Fic recs, January 28th! · 3:04pm Jan 28th, 2021
Has it been very quiet on Fimfic for the past month or so for anyone else? <.<
I've got no news today. My current plans are working nicely, however, and this blog is three somewhat longer than usual stories I've read while listening to a longfic. A fic I should be done with today, in fact, though there's one more after it before I can post that blog. So I'll do some minifics next, and then another one of these, and we'll see if upping my standard word limit to under 30k or so will have any effect on what I can get read for next time. :)
H: 1 R: 1 C: 2 V: 0 N: 0 I: 1
Futile Devices by themoontonite
Genre: Shipping
When I look at you, I love you.
This is the one I read ahead of its Pride and Positivity sequel. On the downside, it's yet another first-person Rainbow Dash fic that doesn't sound like Rainbow Dash. I mean, whether or not you think she'd use a word like "arrhythmic", this just isn't the way she talks. (Though I'd still love to hear LostNarrator read it!) But on the upside? I can't fault the way she expresses her feelings, or those feelings themselves. This doesn't come to much of a conclusion, but it's good if you enjoy reading ponies moon over each other.
Recommended for Shippers
Human Rituals by Aegis Shield
Genre: HiE
With five years to live in Equestria before he can return home, a human spends his time telling the ponies about the world he came from.
This is incomplete, but I'm reading it so I can do a thing later on. And, happily, it's almost like an anthology, so leaving it off in the middle isn't that bad. It literally just started to have a plot in the final two chapters before the updates ended anyway, and the rest can be taken bit by bit. And, my word, I was surprised by how much I liked this! I don't know what it is, really, but the protagonist is affable (I was highly amused by the fact that his name doesn't translate via the magical translation bracelet he wears, so he spends most of the story being addressed as a long 'neigh') and the way he goes about introducing his culture to ponies is… I dunno, there's something right about it. Granted, there's also something wrong about it, namely that this story is billed as human rituals when they're often American ones. Also, affable though he is, the protagonist is pretty much your standard cishet, white, moderately conservative American male. And this does eventually get into pony/human relationships, though I was frankly flabbergasted that his first relationship with a pony is mentioned as basically a footnote at the end of a chapter, used as a major timeskip. So in all, there's some funny stuff, there's some weird stuff, and of course it'll never be finished, but it wasn't bad! It was, in fact, much better than I'd expected it to be.
Recommended for HiE Fans
Keep on Trying by ColdGoldLazarus
Interquel to Griffon Over the Line
Genre: Lunaverse/Friendshipping
After the fight with Gilda, Trixie tries to console her friend.
This was very short but very interesting, lending a great deal of characterization to Lunaverse Raindrops, and even a little to Trixie herself. After all, she's not exactly good at consoling, but she pulls it off somehow. But more characterization for Raindrops is something I'll always be here for, and this delivered.
Recommended
How About Because I Love You by Coyote de la Mancha
Sequel to The Real Question
Genre: Shipping Drama
Things haven't been the same since Twilight got her wings.
This starts off with Applejack and Twilight having a massive quarrel (they are dating, for the record), and Granny Smith just weathering it with a pot of tea as though it were a light morning breeze. And for all that this is about Twilight and AJ's relationship, Granny ends up being a big part of the story in a very clever way, not to spoil anything. Honestly, I found this was just plain excellent from start to finish, from the dialogue to the characterization to the way Twilight's freakout is ultimately dealt with. This is a really awesome entry to Elsequestria.
Highly Recommended
Our Day in Disdain by Rainb0wDashie
Paid Review for the Author
Genre: Grimdark Drama
It all started going wrong when a mare called Dashie returned to Ponyville.
I'm very thankful to this story's introductory author's note, which has a short definition for "Dark Romanticism". One of its ideas is that people are inherently sinful rather than inherently good, so it prepped me to read a story that goes completely against everything MLP:FiM ever stood for. Not that I haven't read things like that in the past, but you get me.
Anyway, this is a very dark piece, with a lot of mystery to it. One of the biggest things I wondered about was Rainbow Dash: she's all over the description, the tags, even the cover art, but until the last published chapter, the story is focused on Rarity, Twilight, Sweetie Belle and Pinkie, and Rainbow barely gets a mention. The big questions, of course, surround this "Dashie", and we get some clues to start piecing things together before Rainbow shows up to answer a few. Dashie has been banished from Ponyville after doing some kind of wrong to a few of Twilight's friends, and while what she did in the past has yet to be answered, what she's returned for is another big point of contention. The CMCs take a big interest in her and are continuously told to just forget her, or that they're not old enough to know, which was a really effective method of keeping my interest up as well.
As I said, this is quite dark, and includes a lot of ponies crying and being hurt. By the end of the first part, Cheerilee's blind in one eye, Dashie's had her nose broken among other wounds, and Twilight is paralyzed from the neck (or shoulders?) down. <.< And the plot just barrels ever onward, which brings me to the writing. The scene-setting tends to be good, and I appreciate that we're shown a lot more about Dashie than we're ultimately told. But there's a lot of editing and proofreading mistakes, which is the really big downside here (assuming the dark stuff isn't a barrier to entry, of course). Despite this, my interest is still piqued just enough to want to continue, though a scene with Applejack clearly lying about her knowledge of Dashie was almost enough to break my resolve. This is an odd commission, because I have to end the review with:
Incomplete
It’s been a busy month.
I thought it was just me...
A little. I can imagine that for the members from the USA, the last month's real world chaos has probably been pretty draining.
5443389
As an American, I second that notion and then some. Can't really speak for anyone else, but if anything, the entire past year's been draining for me creativity-wise. (Granted, that's not a bold statement in the slightest, but still.)
Not-so-Fun Fact: The last time I published something, Friendship is Magic was technically still an ongoing series.
5443414
Ah I see someone else has been slacking for ages.
I've been working the whole pandemic, let me tell you I would have to toss a coin if you asked if I'd rather be working or at home getting the same money for free from the government. It's been THAT bad at work.
(On the interesting side though I'm probably going to be getting cuff and baton training for free thanks to how bad it's gotten. Coin toss as to if I'm going to be getting cheap armor from work or spending a lot more on it and buying it myself.)
Dead, mostly. Maybe five posts a day on my feed.
Yeah, it seems like it's been a slow month. I posted a story back at the beginning of January that stayed in the box for a good day or two maybe, despite pulling in only 30-ish upvotes, which makes me think story output's been pretty slow.
5443438
I maybe get two a day, geez. D:
I've been really emotionally crushed so it's been hard to update my last story.
Yes, very quiet. I guess it's not just for me that current events are pretty draining. I'm in a constant state of emotional exhaustion at the moment, and having three kids in online school at home while also having to work from home due to lockdown is... hard. Pretty sure I'm not the only one with this kind of issues. My creativity is dead for now. :/
5443421
Security guard? My friend does that and he’s vastly underpaid
Just wanted to say thanks for reviewing my story! I'm glad to hear you were enjoying it and a little sad that I had to have you leave the review off with an "incomplete" but as I said in my latest blog post I needed something like this:
Obviously it makes me feel good to read that you were enjoying the story, this is my first win (if you can call it that) since pulling this story off the backburner, but between your review of Waiting For You, my EQD rejection on Waiting For You and Our Day in Disdain, and now this review of ODiD, one thing is very clear:
I'm not good at editing, I'm good at writing. And by writing I mean I'm good at creating stories, the point A to B to etc crafting of a story. I'm good at description and setting scenes, I'm good at setting a mood; but that's only one half of writing cause as I said in my blog I focus more on the story than it's presentation. And it shows from all the basic editing mistakes. I'm focusing more on making the story than presenting it.
I'm not going to get big-headed because you were enjoying ODiD, because there's still a lot of work I need to do.
Even though I've been working on this story on and off for the last 10 years, it's very obvious that I need a dedicated editor. Someone who I can pay to clean up all these mistakes and allow me to work on what I excel at the most. Cause I feel like if I pull my nose off the grindstone to learn how to edit better it will redirect the creative energy I pull out of the ether to write my stories and cause them to suffer; although maybe that's just me being a little pretentions artist
Either way, thanks for the review, I'm gonna shop around for someone I can hire and then I'll get this story fixed up! Maybe even fix up Waiting For You as well if you'd be willing to do another review once it's been cleaned up
5443611
Yeah, definitely find an editor if you can. The mistakes seemed to get worse as the story went (though to your credit, the first actual chapter presents a strong first impression), and the mystery is just strong enough to make me want to keep reading. Hence the Incomplete rating, I feel like there's not quite enough for me to make a judgment either way. :)
5443582
yup, me too. No one wants to pay security well because when we're doing the job well they don't see problems. Or because they see us "doing nothing" so obviously we don't need lots of money.