Sideboard Stories: Thick as Thieves Preview 2 · 3:20am Aug 25th, 2020
I know it’s been a long while since I’ve posted anything, but I want to assure everyone I am still working on writing the next chapter of My Little Planeswalker: Sideboard Stores. The stress of dealing with a global pandemic has made it very difficult to get work done, but I have a solid vision of where I’m going next, and I want to give you a short preview of what to expect from the next chapter.
So, without further ado, here’s a preview of Thick as Thieves, Part 1:
Verko’s office was a very plain room. A small chamber, sparsely decorated with only a few pieces of antique furniture: A simple wooden desk with a matching chair, a standing lamp, red velvet drapes, a wall clock, and a few cheap-looking landscape paintings.
To an outsider, it would look almost quaint. But to everyone else in Klugetown, it stood uncomfortably apart. Far from the constant bustle of the merchant town, everything in the office was oppressively still. The only sound to be heard was the gentle ticking of the clock — and Verko’s claws tapping against each other as he steepled his fingers.
As Capper entered, Verko’s goggles gleamed in the room’s dull light. Though some would call him a naked mole rat, he was never seen without his trademark clothing. A tuxedo and top hat, patched and worn in places, yet always kept clean of any traces of sand or dust. In a desert town, such a feat would cost a fortune.
With an open palm, he gestured to a roughly-hewn wooden stool placed right in front of his desk. “Please, have a seat.”
Capper placed himself on the seat, so low to the ground that his knees almost reached his chest as he sat. From such a low angle Verko seemed to tower over him, his desk nearly eclipsing the entire room. The glare of his goggles intensified as he frowned, staring down at Capper.
“Do you know why I called you here, Mr. Dapperpaws?”
Capper had to force himself not to tug at his coat-collar. “No, I can’t say I do.”
Verko sneered. The click-click-click of his claws intensified as he furiously tapped them together. “For the sake of being charitable, I’m going to assume you’re telling the truth. Lately, you have been getting involved with some very interesting creatures. Interesting and important creatures.”
“Important... wait, you mean those ponies?” Wheels began to turn in Capper’s head. With a bit of work, he could spin this to his advantage. “Because I happen to be something of a hero to them, you know. If it’s a favor you want, I could—”
Verko raised a hand. “Stop right there. I’m not letting you weasel your way out of this.”
“Actually, I’m more of a cat—”
“That is irrelevant!” Verko interjected. “What I’m trying to get at here is ‘those ponies’ were not the mere livestock you told me they were. Oh no. They were much more than that.” He sat up from his chair, his bare footsteps sounding across the wooden floor as he approached the window. He held his hands behind his back as he stared outwards, into the distant skies.
“See, while you were busy lounging about in my town, I’ve had a few eyes scout out Equestrian lands to the north. I didn’t think there was anything up there worth the effort, but your little adventures got me curious. You know what I found?”
“...more ponies?”
“Not just more ponies. I found that there are six ponies of particular importance to that kingdom. Heroes. Legends. Royalty.”
With every word that Verko spoke, comprehension began to dawn on Capper. He did not like where it was taking him.
“For fifty years I’ve owned this town. I found these crooks and scoundrels and brought them under my heel. Before, they were no more than a loose collection of barbarians and outcasts. Now, they’re part of the most wretched hive of scum and villainy you’ll ever see.”
“Er,” said Capper. “Good for you?”
“It’s not good enough,” Verko spat. “I’ve been content with running the show in this measly little town, but the world is bigger than that. And now you’ve proven that there are greater things within my grasp. You stiffed me out of those ponies, and since them I’ve learned that those very same ponies hold the respect and admiration of thousands. My sources have even told me that one of them is a possible heir to their throne! Do you have any idea what sort of bargaining power that would buy me? I could have held an entire kingdom at ransom!”
“With due respect, Mr. Verko sir, I don’t know if provoking an entire kingdom is a good idea.”
“There’s no such thing as profit without risk,” Verko countered. “But those ponies don’t know that. They believe in silly things like ‘friendship’ and ‘love.’ That means they’ll pay any price to see the heroes they cherish alive. Do you understand what I want from you, Mr. Dapperpaws?”
Capper paused. A part of him wanted to say something, but couldn’t find the words.
“And are you familiar with the phrase, ‘there’s more than one way to skin a cat?’”
Capper nodded vigorously. This time he knew exactly what he wanted to say, but the lump in his throat was too thick to speak.
“Good,” said Verko. “You have one week to find those ponies and bring them to me. Don’t think you can run away from the deal this time, because I have eyes watching you at all times, and they will follow you to the ends of the earth. Fail, and I will show you exactly how many ways to skin a cat there are.”
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Verko, Crimelord of Klugetown 3BB
Legendary Creature — Rat Rogue
Assassins, Mercenaries, and other Rogues you control get +1/+1.
Whenever another creature you control deals combat damage to a player, that player discards a card.
Every lowlife, knave, and villain south of Equestria answers to him.
3/3
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Good to hear from you! I definitely understand the stress of trying to work during the plague.
Not all prices are paid in gold, Verko. Blood, sweat, and tears are valuable currencies as well, as your own efforts can attest. And bodily fluids are much more precious in the desert than up north. Add in Mount Aris being just offshore...
Yeah, a one-town crime boss really can't comprehend the scale of the forces he's about to anger.
Also, I'll note that Mole is a supported creature type.
Oof. There are going to be some uncomfortable lessons learned in short order. Capper might want to look into learning the various definitions of asylum, while I suspect that Verko is about to expand his knowledge of some choice four-letter words (fear, pain, nope)...