Short Hand: The Dark Emperor Shepherd 3

The Elements of Harmony meet in the Golden Oaks Library-Or, as Dash was calling it "Super Awesome Resistance Headquarters."

Twilight: "All right. Shepherd invited us to see him in the palace. This can only mean one thing!"

Applejack: "A trap!"

Pinkie: "Snacks!"

Spike: "Trap snacks!"

Twilight: "Yes! It has to be a trap!"

Fluttershy: "Um, so... We don't go?"

Rarity: "Oh dear, that would make us fugitives! I don't have anything for a life on the lam! Maybe in my spare closet I have something that would work..."

Dash: "But we have to go! We have to free Shepherd from the evil spell that's turned him evil!"

Fluttershy: "Do we know what could have turned him evil?"

Twilight: "There are multiple possibilities. Ranging from what's left of the Nightmare Entity, to something left by Discord or Chrysalis. But we can deal with all of them with the Elements of Harmony. Which!" *She tapped her crown* "We're all keeping on us at all times, thankfully."

Rarity: "Yes, except that Shepherd knows we have the Elements. He suggested that plan, as the Princesses's Advisor on Security. So doubtless he will be expecting us to waltz right in the door and try to blast him."

Dash: "Okay, so... We need to get around his trap!"

Twilight: "Yes, exactly. Which is why we're not going to go around the trap."

Dash: "Say what?"

Twilight: "We're going to trip it!"

Applejack: "Beggin' yer pardon Twilight, but have you lost yer mind? You expect us to walk right into a trap set by Dark Emperor Shepherd?"

Twilight: "Think girls! Whatever's turned Shepherd evil probably knows us as well as Shepherd!"

Pinkie: "Some better than others~." *Winks at Fluttershy, who blushes. Everypony else glares intently at Fluttershy*

Twilight: "Wait, what? What did she mean?"

Fluttershy: "Oh, um, I mean, but I didn't, we haven't-!"

Pinkie: "I just mean that Fluttershy's known him the longest! Silly, what'd you think I meant?"

Twilight: "Ohhh! Right! Eheh... Ahem. But what I mean is: Shepherd will expect us to just waltz into the trap and try to reason with him. I mean, it is kind of what we do."

Dash: "At first! Because you're so lame!"

Twilight: "So instead, we'll do what Shepherd would do! We'll strike in the window of the trap, surprising him before his trap is completely set!"

Rarity: "Ah! Brilliant!"

Pinkie: "But wait-What if Shepherd knows we'll do what he would do? Gasp! Does that mean he knows what we would do if we were like him? So should we do what he thinks we would do but in reality do what we think he would do if he were we and we were doing...?"

As Pinkie Pie gets wrapped up in conundrums, Twilight shakes her head.

Twilight: "Don't worry. I have a plan to make sure he's far too distracted to anticipate us anticipating him anticipating us!"

Applejack: "And that is...?"

Twilight: *beams* "We're going to surrender!"

Dash: "WHAT?!"

Rarity: "... Darling? I hate to be the one to say it but-I'm confused."

Twilight: "Exactly!"

Dash: "Huh?"

Spike: "Me too."

Twilight: "I'll explain on the way. We need to get things moving, and quickly! Who knows what evil and diabolical things Dark Shepherd is doing right this instant!"

Meanwhile... At Canterlot Palace...

Shepherd: "Okay, seriously Blueblood? 10,000 bits for mane care products?"

Blueblood: "It does take a lot of money to look this good."

Shepherd: "But the mane alone!"

Blueblood: "It's on my personal income and I reported it on my taxes!"

Shepherd: "You reported it as a business expense."

Blueblood: "If I don't look this amazingly handsome, how can I be expected to grease the right wheels to make sure Aunty's proposals go through? I can't just be a good surveyor, I also must be drop dead gorgeous. And I don't know nearly as many beauty spells as her!"

Shepherd: *sigh* "All right, fine. I'm just saying, I don't see the difference."

Blueblood: "Well my Dark Emperor, you do go for the more rugged look. Like 'I've clawed my way over piles of the bodies of my enemies to get here.' I'm honestly kind of envious, how do you pull that off?"

Shepherd: "With 2 bit shampoo and conditioner, apparently. I think these thousand pages of the tax code can go."

Blueblood: "But my manecare products!"

Shepherd: *Burns the pages* "You're going for the rugged look now, Blueblood."

Blueblood: *sigh* "Well, I have always wondered what I would look like with a beard..."

Comments

[Ether Space]

That is... surprisingly civil for the fanon portrayal of Blueblood.

[Inugami]

5326514
Ditto
I almost thought when he burned those papers Bluebone was gonna go into a hissy fit.
Maybe this Blueblood is the type to see What he could get away with, then do as he see's fit with the info at hand.
Like I totaly expect this B.B. to acquiesce to Shepard's rule of living until Celly comes back to go back to his old routine.

[Drazhan]

Blueblood: *sigh* "Well, I have always wondered what I would look like with a beard..."

Now I kinda wanna see Blueblood with.... well my beard. Sorta on the lumberjack side of wild but reasonably well shaped. I bet if he drops the prissy entitled act and goes for the rugged look he'd be a sexual beast. Just need to not slip into being an ass or as he was.

I like the way this is goin. Should add these in as chapters like you were thinking of.

[Asopus Justus]

I currently live for these Emperor Shepherd bits.

[ShadowLDrago]

Blueblood: "If I don't look this amazingly handsome, how can I be expected to grease the right wheels to make sure Aunty's proposals go through? I can't just be a good surveyor, I also must be drop dead gorgeous. And I don't know nearly as many beauty spells as her!"

I like the idea of Blueblood's pompous jackass persona is an act and that he's a lot smarter than he lets on, just playing the part of an idiot to make sure that Celestia doesn't need to deal with as much bullshit in his own way.

[Darkstarling]

5326554
My favorite portrayals usually fall into the spectrum of ‘actual pompous jackass... but not nearly so much if you aren’t obviously gold digging’ and ‘genuinely very competent’ to taste.

[ShadowLDrago]

5326558

Also fun.

[FanOfMostEverything]

Of course. All of the reforms are part of the trap. As is anything Shepherd says. Well, at least taking a rainbow to the face shouldn't do much.

[Sipioc]

5326514
The best ones I’ve read is where he is actually really smart and good and the pompous brat thing is a cover not unlike Bruce Wayne.

[Sipioc]

“Ahhh Twilight! Tripping my Trap early?”

“You knew?!”

“Of course I knew.”

“Well, I knew you would know! So I planned for you knowing, and made a plan C!

“I knew you would know I knew! So that why I had a plan for that too!”

“Deviously clever your “Lordship”, how fortunate that I knew that you knew that I knew that you knew that I knew you knew!”

“Ever the thoughtful one, but I know you didn’t know, that I-KRAKK GAH!” Applejack stands over the now unconscious Dark Shepherd with a broken wooded chair in her hooves.

“Had to be done.”

Applejack! I had a plan for that! See I knew-KRAKKAHHH!”

Pinkie Pie stands with her own chair in her hooves over a now unconscious Twilight.

man that’s annoying.