Unwanted in my own home · 3:49pm Jan 27th, 2020
Being home is nice and I feel relaxed and at-home up until a certain someone enters the premises.
When she does, the air turns cold. That sense of security you should feel within your own home disappears, rots away and is replaced by the aura of unwantedness. As a person living in his father's home, which he pays for and keeps running, to feel unwanted by his other half (thankfully not bound by marriage) is probably the worst, hurtful feeling you can experience. It hurts like hell.
Every single time I come home, I'll always say hello, as you do, and my dad says hello to me each time I come in, but her? Arg...she sits there on her Kindle like a princess, doesn't acknowledge my presence at all and never looks up to me. The second she sees me, I can read it in her face, that expression where it asks ''What the hell are you doing here?'', like I'm trespassing. Like I'm unwanted, not cared about. What makes me sick is that this is 'normal play' for everyone on her side of the family, so bloody oblivious to what they're doing and how hurt they make others feel that they don't realise the actual psychological harm they've done.
As for myself, this is my hell. I don't know how badly my psyche has been damaged and corroded by her very presence in my life and the way she's treated me and my brother so horribly, but I can guarantee you it's far from good. I don't understand why dad doesn't listen to me when I try to tell him when something's wrong or that she's been mean to me. He finds some excuse, anything he can think of, when I list off all of the wrong doings she's done, which includes invading my privacy (of which I have factual evidence of), insulting me, kicking me out of my own living room and kitchen, accusing me of stealing, frisking me, the list goes on... Like, what the fuck has my life turned into, and why doesn't anybody listen to me?
It's plainly obvious that she doesn't like me, everybody in my family knows it. It's just my dad that doesn't know it, and I'm out of ideas how to tell him. And I know why she stays here, and it's more than evident now that we're buying the house, which scares me because it might mean she can boot me and my brother out and take it for herself. Of course, that's only if something happens to my dad. Dad might be many things, but he does still care about us, but it really upsets me on a personal level when he doesn't listen to me or hear what I'm saying enough to do something about it and tell her to bugger off. My dream is to one day get vengeance against her, a form of justice which is well overdue.
If she thinks I'm going anywhere and letting her take my dad's assets, she's very wrong. Nobody will believe a known liar like her. What reason do I have to lie, exactly? She came into my home and entered my family, not the other way around. She lives with us, not we live with her. I'm not taking any of her shit for anything; she has some nerve about her and an audacity to boot if she dares to make a claim against me being the wrongdoer.
Simply put: fuck her.
I'm staying, regardless if you like it or not, Smokey.
=============
- Ribe ☮
I may have said it before, but come to the EQD Morning or Evening Discussions sometime.
Have a good rant and vent there - it's a good place to let off steam and people generally understand.
I always go to the Morning Discussions (best for my timezone, they start at 11:00 UTC).
Cheers, Gyroscopix.
Bro for real that is like ... I can't even describe how much fuck shit that is
Sounds like a collosal bitch. So many kinds of wrong
5192957
I've been on EQD, but that was so long ago. Most people on there are the type I don't have an interest in conversing with. I don't even know where to find those discussion threads, and I've looked on their site after I saw your comment, too. I've only been on a a couple of times and no more, so I have no idea how anything works over there.
5194775
Bud, you've got no idea. Been with me before I was even two years old, so I don't even want to contemplate the damage done to my psyche purely from her presence in my home and life.
5193057
It's better that you don't. Consider yourself lucky you don't feel like a trespasser in your own home because somebody else, an outsider, comes in and takes over, basically kicking your ass mentally until you crack, look insane and you get pinned as the one in the wrong. I'm not going anywhere, so I think when I come back, I'm going to annoy her to death with my amp.
In the words of Heavy Weapons Guy - ''Let this be lesson for you.'' Don't give what you can't take, laddie. Bad thing to do.
5195838
Hope you can get her removed from your life