Depressed · 3:13pm Oct 29th, 2019
I'm feeling depressed, guys. About my life. And stuff.
So this morning, I was just sitting on the couch, wearing my geeky Zelda\Pony tshirt (I got it people!) and thinking about my life.
NTS: Never think about my life again.
To be honest, I really have nothing to complain about. I live a very good, stable life with awesome parents, five siblings, and a cat. What more could I ask for?
Well...this time I was really thinking about my friends.
I've ALWAYS been the "weird" girl, no matter where I go. I'm a paralyzingly shy introvert, so I can't initiate conversations on my own or even have a talk with someone who's already my friend without feeling like a ball of awkwardness and wanting to crawl in a hole and die.
I'm the most modern person in my family/friend group. There are things about the world that are changing. Not all of them are necessarily good for society, but I ignore the ones I don't want to acknowledge and live my life just the way I would if those things DIDN'T exist. But for some reason, my parents and older sister can't seem to stop talking about the great evils that are coming upon this world and how they will most likely cause the destruction of western civilization. 
My friends all seem to want to talk about it too, so I always sit out of conversations and listen.
I never know how to talk to someone, unless it's about a fandom. But the fandoms I know most about are MLP, Legend of Zelda, and Splatoon. I know one person who's a fan of MLP. One. And I've never met her in real life, only through a group chat. Most people just ridicule me and say it's a cheesy kids show.
I know a couple people who like Legend of Zelda, but never to the extent that I do. I own 8 of the games, (9? 10? I'm honestly loosing count) write tons of fanfiction, draw art.....and basically obsess about it. 
As you may know. But no one else I've met seems to want to talk about it with me.
And I've met one person who knows what Splatoon is, but she was way older than me so it'd feel weird to discuss theories and fanfiction and.....everything that makes a conversation enjoying for me.
I guess I'm just always the geeky, weird one who likes weird things. And no one seems to get that. I don't fit into their happy world of non-depressed teens who get along great with their parents, love school, and are generally perfect. Sometimes I just wish I could find the perfect friend who gets EVERYTHING about me. My inability to continue a conversation by myself, my quirky randomness, my general geekiness......
Well, this turned into a straight-out rant. I guess I just had to get it out somehow.
well thats my life in a nutshell
Well, you have all of us here.
I certainly don’t find you awkward or anything negative.