May the muffins be forever in your favour.Fluttercheer Updates: "Letters to Cozy Glow, "Dreamwalker Dash" and Friend Situation · 6:01pm May 4th, 2019
So, here is a little update on the situation..... My friend is back, sort of. I'm not explaining the long of it now, but we went through a bizarre misunderstanding where each of us thought the other has blocked them on Discord. Which happened because I did block her for one second when I thought she wouldn't return, then lifted the block again immediately cause I couldn't give up. But that nuked her from my friendlist and she only accepts private messages from friends, so I thought she has blocked me in return. And she thought the same, because she temporarily forgot that she has these settings on her Discord account.
So, she is back. The situation is still pretty cold, though, and it's going to take a while until we can grow closer together again.
I have some stuff to catch up on now. Updates for "Dreamwalker Dash" and "Letters to Cozy Glow" will resume next week on Wednesday and Friday, respectively, as usual. I will also write my review for "The Point of No Return" tomorrow. Better out of order than never.
So, yeah, that's where it stands. I'm not dead yet.
Ah, that's a start, isn't it? Slowly but steady. Hope dies last. Misunderstandings do happen, it's part of life
5053433
Yeah.^^
5053435
As I said, I am optimistic and I help where I can. For me, that's what this fandom is all about
I'm currently writing a paper, otherwise I'd definitely make this comment longer, but I'm glad to hear that everything wasn't just cut off at the least. I'm also glad you still have your friend, even if things are currently still a little queer, it's better than just dropping and never talking again; it's a a start. I wish you well!
5053966
More than a little queer, sadly. Right now, she is not talking to me again for days, the fear still having her in its grip. I have no idea how long it will take for this to heal, if I can heal it at all.
5054009
The the thing is, you can't necessarily heal it. Time heals all wounds. Now that you both know it was a misunderstanding, let her have her time for a little bit, and let her know that you're going to try and give her a little space for a bit.
5054204
When I read that sentence, my mind started to scream. I was thinking you would say that she can't heal anymore and that all is lost. I'm starting to think I'm more twitchy and anxious than she is, by now.
I did that, but now I can tell that it was the wrong strategy. While I did that, she nuked her Twitter account and let all her art remove from Derpibooru. Which is nothing alike her; she loves everything about her pony art and while there was an occasional weird comment about her art on Derpibooru, she never appeared particularly frightened or startled enough over such a comment that she would not want that her art gets uploaded there. Especially not art of hers that's already on it removed from there. She even let a picture that she drew for me as a gift and that I uploaded on Derpibooru getting removed. It's not like her.
It was a reaction that was very clearly and undoubtedly caused by a depressed, desperate fit; done while she couldn't think rationally and just felt like she has to destroy something in her pain. And I should have seen that coming, really. Despite her fear of me, she has expressed in the past that she is scared of me leaving her alone. Giving her space is clearly the wrong strategy.
Now, I am giving her space again, but merely because I have no choice, because she does not reply to my messages. During every moment, I fear that another fit could happen and that she destroys something else that is dear to her. Even though she said her Deviantart account would stay. That fear is constantly there.
5054235
You can always download all of her Deviantart stuff and put it in a file, just in case.
5054484
It's all saved in the WaybackMachine. But my big concern isn't that her art could be gone. My big concern is that she could do something that she would regret later when she is out of that dark spot.
She loves her pony art, she loves her accounts and her ambitions and plans and I know her well enough to know that, if she would nuke all of that now, she would mourn it once she feels better. Which would drag her right into the next depressed episode.
5054506
I guess all you can do is give her one long message to take a look at explaining exactly how you feel about that right there, in detail, but in a way that doesn't seem like you're targeting her for it, or that it's something she can't control, etc. Basically make it clear that you just want to see her succeed, and not do anything rash.
5054556
Yes, but there it becomes more complicated. She said she will still do art, but not for the public anymore. And she doesn't trust my words lately. Among other things, she has started to believe that I am only encouraging her to create more pony art for my own, personal entertainment. Remember how I said in the long blog entry how she started to see me as abusive. That's another aspect of that.
If I were to go now and try to prevent her from nuking her accounts, there would be a high risk that she does so anyway out of defiance.
Of course I need to tread carefully with her right now, but it's really hard to tell what is the correct approach right now.