The chronicles of Project Horizons : chapter 23 & 24 · 3:34am Nov 15th, 2018
That's right folks, another double edition just for your pretty eyes and believe me, I have a lot to talk about these two chapters and I am quite... saddened. Saddened because, with chapter 22, I was hoping for Project Horizons to go towards something better than the "going around in circles" we had for the first 20 chapters. However, destiny decided otherwise since, well, more info were given to us. I'll try to explain why those are an issue at a fundamental level too.
Let's go !
As I feared, this chapter is another pity party chapter. I know I explained in details in the past why it was an issue but I need to clarify one thing : I don't mind a character suffering from the consequences of their choices, I even strongly invite authors to go for it. However, it has to be a strong character moment and while the dilemma here is clearly more interesting than the one in chapter 6 (which was a fabricated scene), the dilemma here will not affect her character in any significant manner and no, suicide isn't significant. Blackjack didn't develop her suicidal tendencies, here she had it from the get go and it crippled her character. Why so ? Because she continues to go around in circles development-wise and I fear that this won't be broken anytime soon, especially when all people around her are just mindlessly saying that she has no reason to feel guilty.
Guilt and Pity are unfortunately the two pillars of many characters if not all protagonists in this sad fiction. Blackjack feels guilty for the one she kills and we are supposed to feel pity for her and you can apply this same logic for all of them. This is an endless circle of Pain that can have an interesting aspect in a thematic sense (someone perpetuating the same mistakes, showing that it is trapped in something they can't get out of) however, it has to be timely. Repeating the same type of scenes again and again can only get you so far before "subtle writing" becomes "sloppy and mindless writing." Here, it is an example of the former.
As a reader, in no small part because of the constant exposure of angst, gore and rape, I am not finding this moment poignant. I only feel it's another chapter where BJ killed a bunch of people and had to go through the same beats all over again. Yes, I do agree that chapter 22 was immensely more contextualized a tragedy but it doesn't change that it still follows the same beats : a huge massacre, BJ feels bad for about a chapter or so, her friends forgive her and then she's back to say one-liners and kill people all over again in a campy Wasteland where she has no real opponent.
However, let's talk a bit about the memory of Twilight and Goldenblood in this chapter. I never felt so much contempt for a character than I did for Goldenblood. Why ? Because he is written as someone to make the canon characters look inept, mad or incompetent. He is essentially the brightest lightbulb in the room because the author decided to break all the other one. In this memory, Goldenblood is the one saying that Twilight should not use Chimera as a basis for the Maripony Project and the Twilight we see... doesn't care a single second that this Project was an horrible fusion of innocent lives with monsters and even baby dragons ?
I know why Somber did it : he wanted to show Goldenblood as this ambiguous character who can both be the biggest of assholes and the most compassionnate of all Equestria while showing a ruthless Twilight. However, even if Twilight had some kind of fallout (huhu) with Big Mac, it doesn't justify the... shell of Twilight we're being presented. The Twilight who fell in love with Big Mac and is overly emotional would never be this cold and detached mad scientist. Where's our explanation ? She wants to win the war. Sure, how does that change that she is characterized as an ice cube without a shred of decency while GoldenBlood is shown as a parangon of morality ? (Also, he punched Twilight and she didn't care because he is always on the verge of dying ? Yeah, no fuck you. GoldenBlood is not a fucking friend, he is not even higher ranked than her but he can punch her without repercussion ? Does he piss on her bed too ?)
This criticism is to be seen as the culmination of this OC being just Mr "Did it all" and whose simple existence is constantly shown to make all the beloved MLP characters as completely... inept. We'll get there, believe me, for now, let's move on.
We did have a bit more info about Lacunae and her place in all of this but quite honestly, while it is nice, I have a really hard time being invested in a story involving the Black Book and the Goddess when I know it will lead to nothing since the story of the Goddess is set in stone to be a stupid one thanks to FO:E.
Also, I am very, very disappointed in how her friends treat BJ. She is obviously and quite visibly breaking down in front of them and they know that when she's in that state, she's stupid, reckless, suicidal and utterly blockheaded. If it was something exceptional, their attitude and their ignorance would make sense. Right now, it just shows how little they truly know her or actually care about her. How many times do P-21 and Glory needs to come close to dying before they realize that Blackjack works in very simple ways. There is a simple response : they are all victims and having no one challenging their victimhood and only just pat them on the back does nothing. Even the fucking Dealer whose purpose is to make her face her hypocrisy is simply relegated to a sad expy of her friends. She doesn't need people whitewashing all of her crimes, she needs someone to destroy her face and tell her that if she isn't ready to kill and to suffer the consequence of having this power to kill, then she should just quit. Especially if her angst makes her shoot innocent people because she feels baaaaaad.
You don't get to kill people left and right with ease and cry every time like a baby and threaten to kill yourself. Feeling bad can be natural but damn this fucking character always feel bad, always feel like she's a monster and honestly if she had killed herself, I would have been glad. Because at the very fucking least, she would have taken the natural course of not being able to adress the burden of killing. This character needs to stop feeling bad and internalize that if she wants to be this savior she really wants to be then she has to be determined.
Her friends and others should stop telling her that she's a hero and doing great things. They should say "If you don't want to quit and still wants to kill, then you stop crying and keep marching. Not happy about it, tough luck." and then MOVE. THE. FUCK. ON. This fucking circle of repeated development needs to be broken.
As for Deus memory orb, I would almost feel bad for a character who needed only a few words say by a bitch of a mare to... rape her comrade because he liked her. Then he became a part of Project Steelpony. However, I don't feel sorry for Deus. I don't care about him and about the fact he raped a drunk Twist. This is only another voyeur rape fetish on the part of Somber. It could have been anything with this character, he could have been angry and done something stupid like smacking someone across the face so hard that it would have killed or durably maimed him then he would have been discarded all the same. But no. It had to be rape. Rape, rape, rape. This is becoming a clinical issue at that point.
We also lean that Sanguine is... Trueblood as a Canterlot ghoul and that he is still as crazy as ever and that he works for ANOTHER mysterious figure. One must love this "Secret True Last Boss" kind of plot. I suppose it makes the story going but I hope we won't repeat the same thing over and over. Repeatitivity is already rampant in this fiction.
And then... BJ meets Homage (through a computer screen, but still). If you've read my critique of FO:E, you know how much I like this splendid character who is not at all the most hypocritical and downright hateable pony of the whole Wasteland, second to Pip only. Essentially, BJ trusts Homage enough that she tells her the whole truth about the Stable 99 safe from her trying to kill herself but I'd like to stop on a particular line.
“And then… then… I activated a poison gas talisman in the ventilation system,” I sobbed as I shook, feeling that emptiness ripped apart by pain as I hung my head back. “In a few minutes, I killed four hundred ponies, Homage. Four hundred! I killed everypony I knew in the stable. I… I killed foals. I killed stallions who’d finally gotten their freedom. I killed them all. I know there were probably some uninfected in there too. I killed them. I killed them before they became monsters.”
So... you actually thought about others uninfected but you didn't try to save them ? I actively mentionned that this was what made the dilemma was potent to me and you purposefully didn't look for them ? Sure, I could say that this is Somber covering his ass but I'll treat it as something purposeful. BlackJack, you're a piece of shit. Not because you suffered through the dilemma which was actually pretty good but because you didn't care about killing uninfected ponies. You didn't look for them, you didn't ask around. You would have encountered resistance ? So what ? You were ready to kill them all, would some ponies being a bit worried about you that much of a deal ? Hell, if you tried and they didn't want to follow you AT LEAST you would have tried. You didn't try and so you're whole breakdown means shit to me. Trying is what counts, you didn't and are just sad you didn't succeed in killing yourself along with your Stable.
Also... are we really following a scene of a breakdown with BJ giving music to Homage and even some of her own recordings ? That's not how you break up the tension. It's jarring but... it's nothing new.
And then... the chapter ends with the reveal that a kid was adopted by Card Trick during the rush towards the Stable. I know who that child is and I am now 100% sure that my Twilight theory is correct. However, I won't expand on it, here. I'll do it for chapter 24. What I will talk about is that... Spike left his cave for Blackjack.
You see there is not a lot to respect regarding Spike in FO:E. He is a fucking recluse who did jack for 200 years and stayed in his cave. When in FO:E, he finally left his cave for the war, it was supposed to be a strong moment for his character, something meaningful. Sure, he was and is a shit character but this was supposed to be the moment where he finally accepted to go out of his cave. But PH decided "Nu-uh, he left the cave for me because even if Pip had to convince him, BJ trying to kill herself was enough." Once again, this shows how much PH tries to one-up FO:E by reducing the few arcs that exists to basically nothing and the fact he trusts her enough to show her the Gardens of Equestria when he was barely willing to do so for Pip is extremely jarring.
Somber, stop leeching everything FO:E did. Try to be great on your own. There is no greatness to be found by saying "I'm like Pip but better" constantly. It feels petty and childish. On to chapter 24
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The discussion about why BJ doesn't quit could have been good. However, her reflections only touches on what OTHERS would think of her if she quitted. It isn't linked to any deep motivation or belief, it's just peer pressure. It's quite telling that she didn't think "I wouldn't be able to live with myself" when asked but "What would they think if I did ?" As such, my comment on this character having close to no motivation to do what she is doing and yet still allowing herself to kill AND angst about it at the same time remains unchanged.
“Yes. She commissioned it from the O.I.A. Goldenblood got the machines, the equipment, from somewhere. Everything completely off the books. A hundred ponies lived in this cave for two years straight constructing it. Then he had their memories erased.”
Goldenblood strikes again : he builds the Garden of Equestria. One more thing to add to his ever-growing list of things he was privy about or directly responsible of. Yes, Twilight conceived the idea and schematics but it remains that he is a pillar in the fabrication of something that Twilight hid from Luna and her friends. Let me restate that : Twilight hid the biggest and most important piece of software from Luna and her friends for two years straight before Goldie... My god I had this character but I only will talk about him when his interventions in this chapter are done.
Personally... I don't know what to think about Charity being the element of Generosity. Or at least a candidate. First because, I pretty much hate how Spike said he barely find a dozen ponies worthy of the title in 200 years and yet, Pip found four in two months and BJ is at one. Spike is really sloppy at his job. Second, because I don't feel Charity represents Generosity all that much, sure she had some instance where she was helpful but more importantly... why focus on such a non-character ? She's just a child merchant. Why not Bottlecap ? Isn't it generous to think of trade as the catalyst for a better world ? Exchanging to create order and happiness ? Bottlecap's goal go beyond greed and it would have been a fitting character.
He was smart. Not like Twilight Sparkle smart... but he knew things that I couldn’t imagine anypony knowing. He could read Zebra and speak Dragon. He probably knew most of the most influential ponies in Equestria. But above all, he knew politics. And he was the one who knew that what he was doing was wrong and did it anyway.
My god, stop it ! This character is a fucking embarrasment ! The more of a special snowflake you make him, the less it makes sense for him to never have been mentionned by anyone to Pip, especially since she knows Spike. And he knew how to speak Dragon too, because that's necessary.
In the recording, Luna shows her ineptitude and Goldenblood essentially creates the Ministries from the ground up, pick the Mane 6 to be at their head and will even give directions and "suggestions" to them. GB does everything because, newsflash, on top of creating the structure of the Ministries, he created the O.I.A. that is the most important and powerful ministry that actually knows all the secret and creates the secret projects. He even tells to Dash to make her Ministry the espionnage one... Because no ideas can come from the ponies of the show. What would they do without the benevolent guiding hand of this random pony that they barely know ?
Oh and about that Gardens of Equestria thing, for some reason Goldie successfully tricked Twilight into forgetting that she had built the stuff, erasing her memories and double-crossing her. Because Twilight is dumb like that. I mean how would Twilight ever know now that she has lost her memory, right ? No one is going to ask WHERE THE FUCKING ELEMENTS OF HARMONY ARE, RIGHT ? All alone in a mountain that no one knows is the vessel of the Gardens of Equestria except for Spike who can't talk about it.
Also, Goldenblood knows Twilight's friends better than Twilight. Because he is awesome like that.
“Luna comes to him for advice and he sets up the ministries. He talks your friends into becoming the Ministry Mares. He works in the O.I.A. behind the scenes. The war gets worse and worse and he starts doing the Projects like Chimera and Steelpony. Then…” I knocked one gem and it fell against the next, which fell against the next, and then whole pile was tumbling over.
I... So you realize that and...
“Well, over time, it sort of changed. I’d never really spent a lot of time around a guy like him. I told you how scary smart he was? Well, that didn’t wow me much. Twilight was smarter. But he was also… strong. Determined. Focused. As much as I resented how he created the ministries, he was also the closest thing I ever had to a father.
Okay, fucking stop. I'll make a claim here and now : Goldenblood is the worst character of Fallout:Equestria - Project Horizons.
So this character not only is the only one to know about zebra culture when it would make sense that diplomats, ambassadors, merchants or even Zecora would know about it almost on the same level if not deeper than he does. Not only does he survive alone Littlehorn when everything was made clear that this incident left no survivor. Not only does Luna and Celestia asks for his advice to the point of Luna letting him create the Ministries, choose the head of the Minstries and stir the six of them in the direction he wants on top of creating a secret branch of the government that knows and does everything. Not only is he considered to be on a level enough to flirt with Dash, to hit Twilight in the face, to know better Pinkie than Twilight does and be taken care of by Fluttershy. Not only does he remain the one building and knowing of the Gardens of Equestria and several other projects. Not only is he a prominent figure that appears on newspaper clips and memory orbs...
He is also Spike's father figure ?
This goes beyond one-upping the original story. This goes beyond making a Gary Stu that is behind every crucial aspects of the lore of FO:E. It is a strange mix of both combined with making all the characters stupid, easily manipulated, ignorant or downright uncompassionnate. He has to be the dominant one. He has to be this unstoppable force completely unduly.
From what I heard, I am far from being at the end of Goldenblood's interference. He is EVERYWHERE. There is NOTHING he didn't touch and yet... no one knew about him in FO:E. It makes as much sense as BJ being known by Homage and being on LittlePip's level of fame and yet, we never hear about her in FO:E. This character and everything that revolves around him is just another example of Somber's extreme level of try harding.
In any case, the next parts are utterly boring. BJ is now remotivated and she slams into Enclave. We learn that Thunderhead and Neighvarro doesn't like one another. We learn about the Shadowbolt tower and we have more BJ being badass no matter the situation and she goes back to Megamart. Yes. I'm skipping a good chunk of the chapter because it's business as usual and... we have to talk about BJ.
Blackjack is the direct descendant of Big Mac and Twilight. It is obvious that Twilight is the mare in question and so it means that BJ is of both Apple and Twilight's blood. The sole descendant. Did this character needs to be more special ? Isn't the fact that she owns all the big guys in Hoofington in three weeks not enough ? Isn't the fact that she gets the best weapon and armor special enough ? Isn't the fact that she created a spell out of nowhere special enough ? Isn't the fact that everyone knows her accomplishment special enough ? No, we NEED to make of illustrious ancestors in the most convoluted of manner.
The sequence of events to make her the descendant of a war hero and the most powerful unicorn alive really boggles my mind. I don't get what it was necessary but I'm sure that, with her being Twilight's descendant... There'll actually have a narrative purpose which will be to make cry blood. It could have been anyone in the Stable, hell she could have had killed him in her massacre but no, she's the one. She's the chosen one. She isn't just a random pony. She is THE pony.
Finally the battle against the Reapers. Nothing to say aside from... Psychoshy. Similar name, similar cutie mark, hell she even quotes Fluttershy when she is discorded and she has golden hair... Let's just say she's an experiment from one of the Project for now. I am thinking of things I don't want to and without context, it would be unfair to judge.
But, really "Psychoshy" ?
Closing thoughts : Fuck Goldenblood, Fuck BJ.
The farther you get into the story and post these, the more I feel sad for you. I know what's coming, and looking back on the story it is really absurd. It's gonna get to the point where BJ might as well be fighting a corrupt A.I. system that stole her body and is wielding the elements in order to destroy the planet. Just be prepared to be pausing in between each chapter yelling at your computer, but you mustn't give up as I did. Please, I want to see your opinion on the matter, you're a pretty good reviewer.
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I have no intention of stopping. I am too stupid to quit and I am the kind of person who will go to extreme length to try and analyze something. Sure, this live analysis I'm making is bound to be imperfect since there are things that I am bound to omit but I'm really trying to do something more than just live reacting. I actually try to give to the people that read a comprehensive explanation behind my way of thinking. It's so easy to just say something is good or bad without qualifying it.
Out of curiosity, where did you stop in the story ? No need to talk about events, just the chapter number will do.
Also, thanks for following my blog posts and reading them. It feels nice to see the face behind the views. Don't hesitate to leave comments in the future, I always like to discuss.
I made it all the way to the end, I just skipped all of the really long scenes that didn't feel like they were doing anything. I also didn't read the prologue due to how it ended. If I actually read the whole thing instead of skipping some things (which I find myself constantly doing in these really long stories) I might have enjoyed it more. As you've said in the past, most of the scenes that feel like they're supposed to be serious just end up evolving into hilarity, at least to me.
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I see. Then let us fight together to the end, my good fellow for I have much to read !
Oh man, it's ch. 23–24, and already you've cast aside all hope for this story. I'm intrigued to find out how you trudge through to the end.