Being Alone In a Fandom of Friends · 1:45am May 22nd, 2018
Hey guys!
So, I had a realization the other day about some things regarding me and my friends within this fandom. But before I get into it, I wanna preface it by saying this isn't a pity party or an "oh, boo-hoo, nobody likes me" type thing. This is just something I wanted to talk about, get off my chest and know if anyone else ever feels the same!
So, as per the usual, stop at this cute picture if you want, or continue on for a look into my soul...
I love this fandom.
It's given me some of the best friends I could ever have. Friends that have moved cross country just to hang with me more. It's given me a family and an appreciation for something I was never planning on attempting before (writing, yo).
But, despite all of that, there are a handful of things I run into on a daily basis with this fandom that make me feel, well, like I'm looking in from a window on the outside. Let me explain.
So, to start, I have very, very very minute amounts of interest in a lot of things my friends in this fandom have. Like, video games, internet culture, youtube, memes, computers... None of that stuff really sparks my interest. Actually, I'm the only one in my entire friend group that found the show before the fandom. My older sister was watching it, I sat in on an episode and was like "Yo! This is cool!" And then, she showed me a thing called Fanfiction, which honest to gosh, I had no idea was a thing.
Yeah, I'm that much of a newb.
So, I run into an issue with common interests a lot, even with my best friends. I don't enjoy playing games like Fortnite or Overwatch online; instead I'd rather be out skateboarding or going to a football game. I don't really care for perusing memes and stuff (To this day, I've never been on Reddit or 4chan), but instead, I'd rather be getting the crap beat out of me in a moshpit at a concert.
I mean, I definitely do these things with my friends, still, because we're friends and we do things for each other. But, I don't have that passion or desire to talk about it and get into it like they do. You feel me?
That's not to say it's like that all the time or anything or that my friends don't do stuff with me. In fact, two of my bros from Fimfic are going to a death metal concert with me tomorrow night. (Born Of Osiris... look 'em up) But, it's more of a majority thing that I run into.
I divulged my feelings to one of my friends the other day, however, and he brought something really big to my attention: Personality type. According to him (and I later verified through some research), I'm a very rare personality type for not just this fandom, but fandoms in general.
I'm extremely extroverted. Like, I hate being alone in my room and just talking to people online kind of makes me depressed. I love meeting people in person, being in a position of leadership at work, going to parties, and if nothing else being in voice chats with my online friends.
I actually have an incredibly difficult time communicating with people via text/comment chat. Why? Because I can't communicate very well in a patient setting. To really understand someone and respond to them, I rely on things like eye contact, vocal clues, and body language: stuff you can really only get in an in-person setting. I can't explain it really, but I'm like the opposite of a lot of my online friends in that regard and it can make communication difficult and I probably come across like much more of a dick than I actually am.
I guess the point of all this is just getting my thoughts on paper because I'm tired of just thinking about it. This is not an incrimination on the way oth er people handle their lives: we're all different and that's fantastic. It just means I feel a bit awkward sometimes. (Feeling awkward in a fandom dedicated to awkward interests... go figure).
Anyway, my emotional rant is over. Thanks for reading and being confused. I appreciate it!
-Famous
I'm not confused. You just had to get all that out of your system.
Well, I’m glad that you’re hear, because your stories are simply magnificent. It’d be a crime to set if they never existed.
Well, it is understandable from my viewpoint - and if you have a life outside, go pursue it without regrets.
There are many though, who are on their own - so online is the closest thing available. Both have pros and cons, too.
we're glad to have you in the fandom
Now we gotta video chat. So you don't have anymore reasons to neglect us!
Wow. I thought I was the only one who was a newb in fanfictions and memes when I first came to this fandom back in the fall of 2016.
Like you, I don't go on reddit or 4chan, and I never even heard of fanfiction in general. But i'll never forget my first dab into MLP fanfiction. Past SIns was my first and STILL is my favorite story on here.
Nice to here your thoughts
You’re amazing! And always will be!
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Thanks guys. I actually model my characters a lot off of my own personality, which is why my dialogue tends to feel so natural. I talk a lot, so I know how to use a lot of small details and tendencies to my advantage.
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This was my first story I read and the one that got me into writing Spike. No regrets.
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Thank you very, very much.
Now you know what it's like to be the freak!
Honestly though, it's a really fascinating situation. The fact that you're more outgoing and eager to engage with people has isolated you to a degree. It's almost terrifying.
Anyway, you cool, bro.
We've all been created to be different, ain't nothing wrong with that.
I'm the negative nigga to your positivity.
Don't you forget that.
Your stories are very well made, you can be proud of that.
I dunno man, I feel you too.
I love the energy I get from being outside with people, like there's something ther you can tap into and feel good about. Meeting people, talking to them, face to face and through voice is good it just makes me want to jump.
But like, It's like there's a duality where I'm concerned, cause I can have just as much fun playing or watching a football game as I do playing or watching video games and memes.
I could spend hours reading books and writing and staying in and I would be fine but I would also love talking to my friends and joking around and playing games and sports for hours and biking and hiking.
I suppose there's something for everyone. But I get what you mean
Rant if you have to. Complaining is just something that we humans do every now and then.
Let it all out mate, let it all out.
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Yeah I'm quite like you, there are times to be alone and times to hang with the dudes. But I'm more to being alone, for now at least
I get the vibes you’re laying down, and tbh, I wish i had friends that enjoyed the show or the fandom. I am the polar opposite of what you just descibed yourself as, and I understand it. It’s hard to find people with common intrests sometimes, and that’s you should cherish the people you know who both do and don’t. It’s nice to hang out with someone who’ll go to a party with you, but it’s also nice to be able to have a friend to play online with. Hope that i put a point into this somewhere. Anyway, nice chatting with ya!
I definitely understand that... as over the years I've been around l similarly have felt dissimilar to most in the fandom as well in many ways. I discovered the show before the fandom as well... by accident somehow on Youtube. I didn't know the show had a fandom or fanfiction (or what those even were, I was the definition of a newb) or any of that until like three months after I watched it the first time, also discovering those by accident. Nobody I knew ever introduced any of it to me. I discovered it all on my own kinda by chance and it just kinda slowly grew on me, starting with just watching the show for a while. I also have kind of an unusual background for the fandom... as like you I've never been much into video games, internet culture, all that stuff especially when I first came across MLP. None of my friends at the time were into anything like MLP and I've always been more of an athlete-jock type, particularly during my earlier time in the fandom when I was in high school, playing baseball especially. There just doesn't seem to be a ton of people like that around within the fandom, so I've definitely sometimes had hard times in the past relating to people here or at meetups/conventions I've attended in the past. Similar to you you I'd rather go to an MLB baseball game then watch someone play Overwatch or some other video game. Regardless I've managed to make several enduring friends anyway within or as a result of this fandom, as this IS the best fandom out there. To this day I'm not really quite sure what drew me to MLP and the fandom initially, I guess it filled some kind of void I had in my life. That and it's just a really great TV show! XD I am very thankful that it did draw me in, as it has been a major part of my life since 2011 and it's honestly difficult to imagine life without it now.
Anyway, the point is I definitely understand a lot of where you're coming from dude. While it seems like there's some things like video games, internet culture, etc. that kinda commonly bind many people's backgrounds and other interests in this fandom, part of the amazing thing about the MLP fandom is its willingness to include even those who are on the more unusual side like yourself and I. It is a television show centered around the power of friendship, after all. Like that season one episode where Rarity and Applejack have a sleepover at Twilight's despite their obvious differences in personality and background, they still manage to find a way to become great friends. I think that applies to this fandom as well. MLP binds us... and helps teach us the many intricacies and forms friendship can come in.
Brony on, my friend.
I'm glad you got it all of your chest. I didn't know it could be this difficult for extroverts, but the more you know
Well, I'm definitely on the opposite side of the extrovert spectrum from you, but I understand the disorientation of sharing a Big Interest with people who aren't interested in the other things that come naturally to you. (For me, it's distance/backcountry hiking. The sort of person who is big on the outdoors doesn't tend to spend as much time on the internet.)
Wrt the metal interests though, you're certainly not alone there. Just off the top of my head, Horse Voice and Jake the Army Guy are dedicated enough fans that they wear their patch vests to cons. (I'm assuming that they're not the friends you're talking about, anyway.)
Thank you for saying that. I have felt the same way for a long time as well. That's a good thing to know about ourselves though. Knowing is half the battle and now we can move forward. Thank you again for this. Keep on doing your thing.
holy frost, there are Extroverts in the fandom? In ANY Fandom?! the end is neigh...
I myself, am also an Extrovert! Even if I enjoy video games and voice chats more, I've made a name for myself at my school among everyone, and is actually somewhat known throughout my neigh-borhood (yes, sue me) because of me being good at comedy, and sports. Safe to say, you're not alone!