Nothing New Really

So, I guess I need to start working on this thing again.... And I still need to write at least two thousand words for the torture spike contest as well. I know you can't see it at this stage but the plan was for nightmare moon and Sunset to escape in order to end the chapter and the next chapter would begin with Binky and Diamond again in the lead. But, there would be a cut for the other Diamond in the Noragami abridged universe before shifting perspective to the Sunset and Nightmare Moon thing again.

A/n: This is a work of fanfiction, as such it is a branching story that uses the characters created for a series (if not a line) of children's toys; Toys that have been marketed using similarly representational material, and material which encourages the playful discharge and expression of pent up energy with the potential for insight if not wicked and illicit purposes. I do not own A Certain Scientific Railgun, A Certain Magical Index, Noragami Arigato (abridged or otherwise), Equestira Girls, Friendship is Magic, Parasyte, or any references to the number of other head nods, winks, and ribbing for many of the other books or animated series like Discworld that strike my fancy.

The story so far is not as complicated as it might seem at first glance. The Diamond Tiara from the Noragami Abridged universe was bitten by an extra terrestrial snake. Binky, which we'll argue is a Tantabus like entity, took over her body shortly thereafter when granting Diamond Tiara's death-wish thus becoming Screwball. Scootaloo is actually one of a number of __flawed__ Regalia weapons and blessed vessels crafted by Binky (the others unnamed at this point except for Twist, and possibly batsy-loo) the idea being that 'he (in the little g sense of godlike) gets more incompetent or incomplete with the manufacture of each one. Binky was called to an isolated location under the guise of granting a wish by Princess Luna. Being the god of wisdom that she is, Princess Luna was actually using this as a ruse to capture Binky and purge the minor god of discord and havoc.

While this was happening another version of Diamond Tiara was trying to escape a world caught up in an infinite time loop as a result of something along the lines of an angel falls or endymion tower incident if you are familiar with the certain magical Index universe. The Diamond of that universe is the analog of Backstabbing Blade, and this will be clarified with any future chapters taking place in Academy City. In the Academy City universe Apple Bloom's body was taken over by an extraterrestrial that is currently living with Derpy hooves. Applejack has been hospitalized, and Scootaloo is a spy working for Queen Chrysalis. Rainbowdash is the analog of Academy City's Railgun, so everyone familiar with A Certain Scientific Railgun already knows she's a terrorist seeking revenge for the creation and mass murder of her clones, which were originally intended to help scientists find a cure for muscular dystrophy(or something along those lines). I'm still debating over whether to have the clones call themselves rainbow tank, thorax, or Dashell … if anything the little one should be Thorax.

But, ironically enough, the introduction itself is still far from over.
Binky's Friend
Chapter 3 (part 1)
Another Face

By Everglue Horace

Princess Luna's 'Center For Kids Who Can't Magic Good, and Wan'na Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too' wasn't just another school located in the heart of Academy City. It was a CLOUD research facility that housed state of the art medical facilities, a hamburger university for vocational skills training, and a public library which rivaled anything available through many a rare bookseller or online media warehouse in the exterior.

To become one of Little Woona's Urban Achievers you had to be truly 'special' among the special needs population. Not remarkable, just special in the sense that your parents had more money to burn than common sense.

The only exception to this was, of course, Twilight Sparkle. Who, through some fluke or strange coincidence, won the contest to name the learning center while pretending to be a fifth grader.

Technically, she wasn't really pretending. But, Luna had no idea Twilight Sparkle was _THAT_ special until she laid eyes upon her. And, clearly there was no one more special than Twilight Sparkle. Princess Luna had just assumed Twilight Sparkle was a bit slow among the underprivileged, not developmentally challenged beyond all hope of repair.

Luna had seen fewer than three such creatures assembled by a necromancer or alchemist with as much care and precision craftsmanship. In fact, if it wasn't for the glamour spell to hide the stitching, and the fact that Twilight Sparkle's blood had been replaced with some sort of magically regenerating dark ichor, she might be completely indistinguishable from other foals.

Twilight's blood, now the color of ebon darkness shrouded with a faint purple glow, was probably the only 'dead' give away to the creature's creation. Whether or not Ms. Cheerilee was aware of the full extent of Twilight Sparkle's handicap, or whether it was a lie of omission, one thing was painfully obvious. Twilight Sparkle was among the living impaired. While admittedly a high functioning zombie, or goul depending on whatever terminology was politically correct at the moment, Twilight Sparkle was by all means not the only zombie in Academy City.

After all, there was at least one other...similar creature working in a nearby café, and [if she had to hazard a guess] at least a community of hundred more within the city limits itself. Additionally, while it's true that even Jello has brainwaves Twilight Sparkle clearly wasn't getting the necessary intake of proteins and metta-cognitive brainwaves necessary to maintain a level of healthy psychological functioning much higher than that of a dog.

Fourtunately it..she, whatever Twilight was, the undead thing itself wasn't contagious because that could have opened a whole other can of worms for the school considering it was already a test site for illegal medical experiments. The least of which being the cloning of pegasuses en masse for the purposes of epigenetic testing, whose bodies were being disposed of covertly through the local hamburger academy.

Luna briefly wondered if she should have the remaning headcheese sent over to the rancid creature's stable, apartment, flat, or solar just to see if the Promethean experiment could then learn calculus. Then she remembered the original Rainbow Dash had dyscalcula and palmed the bridge of her snoot with a hoof an not out of shame or a momentary bout with nausea.

With a sigh Princess Luna idly looked over the rest of the files of the students in her end class. The files were stacked half-hazardly on her desk before shimmering briefly, floating a foot off the desktop and encircling her like an organized rolodex with a faint blue glow. After selecting one of the files as they rotated around her with all the energy of a praxinoscope, the files neatly lined up and fell onto the desk stacked once more. Luna then took a moment to flip through the file on hoof.

Diamond Tiara, code named the Alchemist, was special in a different way from Twilight Sparkle. And, even among the special she was special... not to mention her old man was flush with cash up the wazoo. A natural prodigy when it came to alchemy and earth based magic she was largely tutored in the arcane until she accidentally stumbled upon telekinesis as a poor facsimile of substitutiary locomotion. With the unfortunate side effect of permanently crippling her ability to use magic ever again unless she wanted to suffer internal hemorrhaging or a grand mal seizure accompanied by fits of epilepsy, she is currently recovering from a form of goldfield syndrome.

The investigation into how a promising level 4 gemstone, or whatever the current generation of earth ponies preferred to call themselves after the latest civil rights movement, was reduced to a level 0 three hares away from being a permanent vegetable was still pending. There was, of course, speculation that Diamond Tiara pissed off the wrong person before it backfired and nearly cost the filly her life. While it can neither be confirmed or denied, it was also suspected that her father either runs or maintains order within the criminal underworld of Academy City. As such, it was with extreme caution and trepidation that any treatment plan involving cloning or experimental surgery be taken very seriously and blah, blah, blah. Nothing interesting there.

Next file; Button Mash, code named Minecraft and better known as the god of gaming (little g obviously), an autistic technophile and strategist who spends most of his free time playing what he likes to call 'gal games.' Rarely a moment passes when he isn't staring idly at a computer screen of one form or another like a tonberry. His half sister Elise, a thestral of some sort code named: Fire Engine, being the only other person he talks to with any regular frequency (in more than single word sentences).

When he isn't out playing detective, or patrolling the streets like a common gigolo looking to snatch a young filly's first kiss, he seems to turn up at a lot of crime scenes with casual disinterest and a flex rack, both highlighting the fact he is magically disabled and usually supporting a pocket media player he mastered with the use of his tongue. Additionally, there were rumors that if he kissed a girl she would have no memory of him following the exchange.

While certainly more interesting than Diamond Tiara, Button Mash was nothing to write home about, and if a lady couldn't remember her first kiss then it was doubtful he'd have meaningful relationships with any pony other than his sister for the foreseeable future.

Next File…Apple Bloom Magnus; Luna would be having words with the recruiter of their latest hire. While Apple Bloom's picture was conspicuously missing from the teachers file, one thing was obvious, if it took her seven years to complete a four year degree she was clearly incompetent. And, while all the A's on her transcript looked promising, taking anthropology, sociology, communication, and speech language pathology classes as her electives instead of learning a second language proved she was anything but clever.

Apple Bloom was neither cum laude or valedictorian, and her degree had no minor whatsoever. The only possible explanation was her recruiter had been charmed by a gifted lemming who knew how to feign intelligence and play catfish. Not to mention Luna had never heard of a 'Canterlot High School' much less Apple Bloom's previous employer 'Sweet Apple Acres.' Granny Smith indeed, Luna rubbed her temple in annoyance and decided it simply wasn't worth it to press the issue further. After all, it wasn't like she needed anything more than a foal sitter to play look out for the students anyway.

Still, whoever this Apple Bloom character was she must have been a real idiot. She'd met children who could speak a second language, and this girl could barely speak the one if her regular 'C's in college English were any indicator of academic intelligence

Next up, Snails Escargot , second oldest student enrolled in the end class after Twilight Sparkle. Registered in the Academy City database as Black Swordsman, Snails was one of the roughly 6,000 survivors of Sword Art Online. SAO was a massive multiplayer online role playing death game that lasted just over two years and cost the city billions in medical expenses alone.

Snails, while academically gifted, was literally a psychopath and total failure (if not a complete retard) when it came to logical reasoning, choice dilemma, and citizenship questions. When confronted with test scores revealing his status as a violent psychopath, Snails argued the tests were stupid, unrealistic, and did absolutely nothing to keep a real tyrant from acquiring money, status, power, and influence. Bold words considering the tests also revealed Snails has both a paranoid personality disorder and no natural leadership ability whatsoever.

With a strong need to objectify others, and a need to protect his property like a young dragon should a situation come to blows, it was hoped Snails would imprint on one of the other students in the end class like a "badass baby duckling." Then, once tethered like the dog he was, continue preparing him to enter military service like all the other SAO survivors.

Finally, there was Snips, codenamed the Joker. Who genuinely believed he was an extra terrestrial from the planet Arkham and that his girl Harley would love the new meds he was tripping on. Other than the delusion he was an alien from another world, and that the learning facility was actually some sort of outpatient mental hospital where the lunatics were running the asylum, the Joker seemed mostly harmless and agreed to keep a watchful eye on the Black Swordsman.

Should the joker notice any signs that his new 'friend was a danger or threat to himself or others Snips was to report to the nurses station immediately and let the Anti-Skill or Judgment officers effectively neutralize him. Luna sighed, she really needed some wild turkey if these ponies were the best chance she had at assassinating the great and powerful "Trixie" Lulamoon before she became an alicorn.

Every single pony on file were little more than a bunch of two bit hacks or mary sue recolors. Granted, Luna still had until weasel stomping day to get them all up to snuff. For the moment, however, the only two she could consider putting money on at this point were Diamond Tiara and Twilight Sparkle. That is, of course, assuming she didn't find Twilight Sparkle's mysterious necromancer first. All she had to go on was pink thread and yellow pegasus feathers at this point.

It just didn't make any sense. It was almost as if Luna were looking for the ghost of that poor little orphan mare Fluttershy. The poor filly whose body was recovered during a recent investigation of the local rainbow factory. Granted, it was common knowledge as to what happened to young pegasi who didn't meet certain homogeneous standards or requirements in the pecking order, still something about Fluttershy couldn't help but remind Luna of Snow Drop and her brother Cruise Control.

It was absolutely barbaric how pegasi treated their crippled foals and wounded. At the very least, Luna felt secure in the knowledge that she gave her little urban achievers the chance to let their deaths have meaning for all their suffering. And, while the hypocrisy of what she was doing completely eluded Luna at the moment, that security was enough to make her feel better about herself. Besides, with teamwork and synergy all things were possible.

****

Elsewhere Twilight Sparkle, a Level 0 ESP'er code named 'Imagine Breaker' in the Academy City database, lived in alone in a third floor studio apartment with a balcony and no air conditioning. Academy City ranked most of its inhabitants based on natural psychic ability. Twilight Sparkle had none. And, while she was by all means an inquisitive and intelligent unicorn she wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. Hence the reason she was currently taking remedial lessons with Button Mash, Snips, Snails, and Diamond Tiara under the tutelage of Ms. Apple Bloom.

To add insult to injury, not only was she twice the age of most of her classmates, Apple Bloom was a child prodigy making Twilight the oldest pony in the classroom. Worse, Twilight Sparkle had no natural talent in applied sciences or mathematics. So, in all likelihood, she could suffer retrograde amnesia and no one would even notice. At the very least she could pride herself on the fact she wasn't as delusional as Diamond Tiara, who seemed to think being told that even among the special she was special was a compliment.

Wisdom was not one of the natural gifts bestowed upon Twilight Sparkle, and as such, she wasn't considered very smart. Because she was a few years older than her classmates the closest thing she had to a friend was her Smarty Pants doll, which had been lovingly converted into a clutch cover with a purse strap for her cell phone during one of her home economics classes. Her parents had sent her to Academy City so that she might have opportunities that would be unavailable to her in Canterlot. But, considering her social status was roughly equal to her psychic ability there was little chance of it bearing any fruit unless some miracle happened.

Some miles away Bellatrix Lulamoon, A level 5 unicorn code named 'Accelerator' in the Academy City database, spit on the corpse of her latest victim from the hive. "Pathetic." Bellatrix Snorted. 'Trixie was the highest ranking level 5 in all of Academy City. And, it was presumed she was the most likely to attain alicorn status. Hence the reason for the necessary slaughter. Although 'meat grinder' would probably be a more appropriate nickname for her, she always had the excuse she was following orders waylaying any guilt she might have felt for killing the 'sisters. It wasn't like they had souls anyway. After all, they were 'clones made exclusively for her personal use as training dummies.

The 'sisters, all members of a hive mind, were Level 3 clones of another level 5 listed in the Academy city database as 'Railgun. In theory, the great and powerful Trixie would ascend to alicorn status if she killed 100,000 level 0's or more.However, since there wasn't exactly a war to test this theory out, and no one was willing to kill that many "assets" just to find out if it would work, they used the left over clones from the muscular dystrophy trials to train Bellatrix in her special talent. That the ice blue unicorn, with ice in her veins, might reach her full potential and become an alicorn as powerful as the legendary Nightmare Moon was far to great a tantalizing prospect to resist for any scientist.

Railgun, the template upon whom all clones of the hive were based, better known as Rainbow "Danger" Dash had to be escorted at all times by a member of Judgement to ensure accidents didn't happen during the experiment. Unfortunately, Scootaloo (a level 4 nicknamed the Transporter or simmilar) couldn't be with her 'sissy always. And, her scotophobia prevented her from following Rainbow Dash at night.

Additionally, Even with the __STRICT__ curfew enforced, Rainbow would often sneak out at night to parts unknown. In spite of this, although there were rumors among Anti-Skill and Judgment that she was the terrorist blowing up assorted C.L.O.U.D. factories throughout the city. Nothing could be verified and Scootaloo would never believe it anyway. Seeing as CLOUD was the largest pharmaceuticals manufacturer in the city, and considering how poorly Dash reacted when Tank died, there was no way Scootaloo would ever believe her 'sissy would put peoples lives at risk in such a reckless or senseless manner.

Still, it would be today of all days, the day that all of these aformentioned ponies lives would forever be entangled because of a certain magical Index. Index, the unicorn formerly known as Sweetie Belle, who had all memories of her former life erased when more than 100,000 forbidden books, grimoires, and tomes, in addition to other magical textbooks and necronomicon housed in Celestia's personal library among the archives -within church of necessary evil- were uploaded into her brain all at once.

Yes. For this honor, and in spite of her photographic memory, Index had no memories of her former life because her personality was slated to be wiped as part of routine maintenance schedule to protect her from accidentally or purposely revealing the contents of the Grimiores to anyone outside of Celestia herself or the Church of Necessary Evil. Index, being sharp as a whip even before she forgot who she was, failed to see how she would know if they followed through on their promise of allowing her to remain Celestia's apprentice if she had the memory of a goldfish.

Within Index or Sweetie Belle's not so humble opinion, loosing both your sense of identity, and any semblance of personality was too high a price to pay for being unable to keep your mouth shut. It was bad enough she lost the former when the books reformatted her brain in the first place... she also didn't want to loose what was left of her soul, and while Flufflepuff was the bestest pony ever she enjoyed Cadence so much more when she could still talk.

Sadly, considering magic was a public secret anyway, the text were so obscure as to be ridiculous, the only way one could know she violated the trust were if they knew the text she quoted from just as well she did. And, considering she had no memories of being Sweetie Belle prior to being implanted with the 'Guilty' knowledge of dark magic and chaos theory to begin with, the only way she could avoid leaking sensitive information (or unconsciously quoting the works that made up the core of her new identity), would be if she knew how to blackmail every-pony that thought she was more evil than Silver Spoon and Peppermint Twist.

However, unfortunate for the guard at least, the filly formerly known as Sweetie Belle escaped just days before the ritual that would erase the what was left of the Index Librorum Prohibitum's latest avatar, and more or less infantilize her for the next two or three months. She didn't care if she was going to be Celestia's latest pupil or personal student. It obviously didn't do Sunset Shimmer any favors.

And, it went complete without saying, many of Celestia's former protégés reportedly died before they managed to become an alicorn. The only successful ascension to alicorn through magic during the last century was of Princess Cadenza, and being a blood relative of the royal family meant she never had to worry about being lobotomized... Fufflepuff not withstanding.

The Church of Necessary Evil sent only two Magi to retrieve the filly formerly known as Sweetie Belle from Academy City. There were other places the Index Librorum Prohibitum could have been, and other hunters and skip tracers had been directed elsewhere. But, ultimately, Index was hiding in Academy City, so it stood to reason she would face off against one mage or the other.

Big Mac, better known as Styil Magnus, had a legitimate excuse for visiting Academy City. Along with Rarity, her majesty's personal tailor and private assassin, the two Magi traveled beside one another in awkward silence. It was because of Rarity's skill that Celestia appeared six inches taller and ten pounds lighter in full regalia... and it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Sweetie Belle had once seen her sister turn into a giant insect and try on the clothes herself.

Although Big Mac's sisters lacked a similar aptitude for magic, both were quite successful in their own right. Applejack was a member of Anti-Skill whereas Apple Bloom was now a teacher at a nearby middle school. Neither knew of his magical aptitude for fire, nor were they aware of his true name. Rarity, on the other hoof, had a 'kill anyone Index comes into contact with on sight' order. Neither were particularly fond of the mission they had been personally selected for, but lacked the necessary authority to care.

Operation: 'Puppy-Smiles is Bestest Pony' was underway.

May the Helhest of Dulahan have mercy on their souls. . .

Back at Twilight's apartment it was obvious she just didn't want to get up in the morning. It wasn't because she didn't have friends. Twilight Sparkle had the bestest friends ever… the only problem with them was that they were imaginary. While holding her smarty pants doll turned purse Twilight Sparkle sat up in bed, wrapped herself in the covers of her sheet so that it settled around her like the cloak of a monk, perhaps even like a dark mage, even though it felt like the aluminum wrapper of a baked potato, and Twilight looked more like someone in a tweaker shelter. Twilight Sparkle called out as if summoning a demon into the sweltering void of her studio apartment in Academy City.

"Discord! Are you busy?" Twilight asked. Having opened the magical Avenue Q: Complete Chord Songbook (for ponies that can't sing good)which she picked up at a thrift store one day on a whim. You know, at that one ability shop, run by that crafty merchant who usually hangs out at anime conventions giving every-pony a hard time by sending them to the land of Mar as a hairless ape or five fingered tentacle monster. And whims were something the dead rarely had as mood rarely struck them.

Obviously, knowing that demon by name helped tremendously when summoning forth the greatest evil the multiverse has ever known. As such Twilight didn't need to flip a light switch or light any candles. No sooner had the secret words of the obscure summoning ritual known as the blatantly obvious slipped from her lips when the real world melted away. Melted like a moment of mindful meditation escaping into a world of structured chaos or something to that effect.

The heat of the room around Twilight quickly evaporated immediately... because that is how magic works apparently, leaving a cool feeling of a breeze on an autumn morning tingling across her warm body.

The only thing that remained of her apartment, at least from Twilight's perspective, was the bed. Whether or not it was a real bed will be heavily debated by philosophers and politicians. Still, it was clear the pointless narration was starting to get distracting.

"Twilight Sparkle! For you I have all the time in the world, but first there are a few things I have to finish up." the draconequus replied. "I am amending a finer point of causality."

"Oooh! Sounds like someone has a lot on their plate." Twilight replied. In a cruel mockery of a more impassioned creative genius.

"Reality benefits from the occasional jolt-"Discord was interrupted.

"You aren't going to like, start a war or anything, are you?" Twilight asked in a lilting tone only mildly interested. Which is more interest than the usual zombie or other undead creature could hope for without a lot of training or help.

"You dislike violence?" The way Discord asked this question was like a cat eyeing a mouse. "I can't just reveal everything, you'll simply have to wait and see…"

"So…" There was an awkward silence between the two before Twilight Spoke up once more "What's it like to be the lord of space and time?" She wasn't exactly grasping at straws with the question. She knew Discord liked to talk about himself, his goals, and his work. Plus, since this was all in her imagination, again more imagination than the dead have need for, she could find out a little about herself in the process.

"Hmph, again with the same stupid questions." Came a distinctly different voice from behind Twilight Sparkle. She would have been startled if she hadn't felt the pink pony crawl into the bed with her. "How does someone like you survive if you can't even remember the answers to questions you've already asked a million times over?"

"Hello Pinkie Pie. I missed you too." Twilight responded cheerfully. " Has Discord been treating you well?"

"He made cotton candy with chocolate milk for breakfast, but completely forgot to buy whipped topping." Pinkie Pie was also a zombie so this was actually a saber rattling, riveting, and completely original conversation despite it coming almost entirely from somewhere else.

"Oh…" Twilight responded mournfully. " That might be my fault actually, there was a power outage last night and I haven't had an opportunity to replace everything in the fridge since I got up. I was late for class this morning and Apple Bloom insisted I stay behind and help her grade papers."

After patting Pinkie Pie on the head like a dog Twilight continued. "If it makes you feel better I haven't had anything to eat at all. Of course, since we're all technically he same person, I suppose it's good that one of us ate something."

Pinkie Pie looked as if she had been stunned stupid. "Gasp! Ohmygosh! You think-"

"Pinkie." Discord gave her a mothering look.

"But, I mean c'mon. She really doesn't know?" Pinkie seemed utterly and truly shocked "How could she not know? She comes here all the time."

Twilight wasn't entirely sure what the two mental constructs of her id and superego were talking about, but she never really understood half of what Apple Bloom taught her either.

Discord's simple response was "Deus ex Machina" and the matter just seemed to drop into silence so quiet you could hear a pin drop. And then, there was another pregnant silence before Twilight started talking again.

"Anyway, I've been thinking of using my cell phone to write a blog or web journal based on my adventures in Academy City, only instead of letting everyone know I live in Academy City I was thinking I'd tell everyone I lived in a make believe city called Pontypool or Ponyville and-" Twilight sparkle was cut off by Discord who had a rather excited gleam in his eye.

"What an excellent idea! And, maybe each week you could throw in a paragraph or two about what you learned about friendship. Ooh! And you know what else would be cute, if you addressed each one to Princess Celestia and ended it with 'your favorite student. Twilight Sparkle." Discord smiled wickedly "That ought to scare the living daylights out of her for at least a week or two. "

"Why would it scare the living daylights out of her?" Twilight was confused and looked visibly perplexed "She probably doesn't even use the internet."

"Good point," Discord snapped his fingers "I'll have Pinkie Pie write down a copy of everything and send off a burn notice after the situation with Index has settled down." Discord then snapped his fingers twice before a martini appeared in his gryphon like appendage.

"Index?" all train of thought from Twilight's question immediately halted when her cellphone started vibrating in her Smarty Pants clutch. "I'd better get that, it could be important."

"Twilight… Are you lonely?" Discord asked.

"What do you mean?" Twilight responded nervously. The question was uncomfortable, especially from Discord, and especially considering the void of chaos should have dissipated the minute her reality started interfering with the illusion of fantasy. " Other than my phone and this place I don't have anyone else I can talk with really. You guys and my family are my whole world."

"Twilight, Given the opportunity to reinvent yourself, what would you do?" Discord asked.

"I- I don't know, I'm not all that bright." Twilight responded. Discord was scaring her. Why wasn't the illusion breaking, that was her talent after all, breaking things, this realm shouldn't exist anymore if she didn't want anything more from it. Her phone vibrated again. Could she answer it in this place, this void of madness… what if Pinkie Pie and Discord said something while she was talking, then everyone would know she was crazy. If she was both crazy and stupid her parents would probably lock her up in a nuthouse.

"Twilight, suppose I bestowed upon you the ability to predict the future." It was more a statement than a question. . . but given the lack of originality, creativity, and spontaneity in the imagination of the dead it was at the very least comforting. Like those stupid writing exercises where you're supposed to re-write what someone else wrote and then tweak it so that the tone and voice chance around a bit.

Twilight decided to answer her phone. After removing it from her Smarty Pants clutch she looked at the screen. A sigh of relief. "Good. It looks like someone's just texting me." Her anxiety must have been powering the illusion of Discord's realm because almost immediately her apartment faded back into existence.

For once Twilight could appreciate the blast of warmth as reality overtook the fantasy. The text message had one line, the email was from Discord. It simply read "Check the balcony…"

The sheet fell back from Twilight Sparkles's head, cascaded down her neck, and rested on her shoulders as she blinked in surprise. Twilight would have been terrified that Discord had sent her an email if it weren't for the fact that the message disappeared after the second blink and she was staring at the blank illuminated app screen of her cellphone.

"The flip…" Twilight then looked up from her screen to see a young marshmallow colored unicorn filly draped over her balcony. She was about to question what exactly the strange unicorn was doing there when all of a sudden.

"I'm so- I'm so very hungry. Feed me." The unicorn filly begged.

Twilight looked around so see if there were any cameras in place.

"Did Shining Armor put you up to this?" This seemed like a prank he would pull.

"Very-very hungry." the marshmallow like unicorn whimpered and whined.

"What was that?" Twilight asked. She wasn't completely sure she heard right.

"I said I'm hungry you ninny." The filly with a nerdy two toned mane replied.

"Excuse me?" Twilight wasn't sure how to respond. This was getting tedious.

"Are you even listening? I told you I'm hungry." The unicorn filly huffed indignantly. "What are you retarded?"

It took Twilight a moment to figure out how she should answer either question before she realized this foal thought she was retarded anyway. It wouldn't matter what Twilight said. Being in special classes because she was dumb did not mean she had to accept abuse from complete strangers ...That sort of thing was for friends and family only, which made it okay.

Rather than answering this rude little beast's questions, Twilight decided to ask another. "Do you make a habit of showing up at peoples homes and asking for things you didn't earn?"

"So, do you have any food in there, or what? I'm starving." The unicorn filly whined like a trained seal. Twilight blinked, it was like having a conversation with miniature version of Pinkie Pie.

Twilight took a moment to briefly wonder if she had left Discord's realm at all. Everything looked normal enough, but this was too much like her fantasies of friendship to be real. New friends didn't just pop out of the aether fully formed, she had to work really hard to come up with the design for discord, even though she based him on a statue she once saw during a field trip to Celestia's labyrinth… and Pinkie Pie looked kind of like that waitress at Sugarcube Corner.

Still, it took a bit of effort to draw all the different parts of the chimera with just the right proportions and everything, and the waitress always looked so depressed and stone faced it was only a matter of time somepony drew a picture of her with a smile on her face. Twilight had to concentrate really hard to draw her good, and it wasn't like she had a photographic memory or anything. I mean how else would you explain the curly hair.

Granted this did not help twilight with a creative answer to the question of whether or not she was stupid or what. "Or what, definitely what...” Twilight thought aloud. “Hey, listen. I didn't catch your name." Twilight regarded the filly with a lackluster expression.

"I told you already, I'm Index. Index Librorum Prohibitum. Can't you remember anything? I sent you an email. Shining Armor said you were a librarian." Index huffed "Now shut your pie hole and gim'me some food."

"Just because I hang out at the library does not make me a- WHERE IS HE!? SHINING, I KNOW YOU'RE WATCHING ME!" Twilight Yelled.

"Whoa, Nelly. Just hold your horses and pipe down. I never said Shining Armor was actually _With_ me." Index sighed.

"Then how did you find me?" Twilight asked.

"Internet. Duh." the filly formerly known as Sweetie Belle stated it as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

Meanwhile, on yet another parallel world, Sunset Shimmer was currently living in a rehabilitation center. This was not entirely unexpected as she was apparently counted among a number of young survivors who found themselves displaced after Kayaba Discord's MMOVRPG Sword Art Online went viral. What made her different from most of the other participants in her mandatory group counseling sessions was that she wasn't a complete and total nutcase. Granted, She didn't exactly know what a MMOVRPG was, but she had good reason to avoid it after meeting Nightmare Moon, the Dazzlings, Chrysalis, Fluffle Puff, Laughing Coffin, and Button Mash. The only one in the group that seemed marginally normal was Starlight Glimmer and even Sunset knew she was a total headcase.

Evidently she was suffering from a phenomena the psychologists at the center were referring to as the pretty pony princess from a parallel world syndrome, wherein a selection of youths (predominately young girls) exposed to Discord's MMOVRPG believed themselves to be pony princesses from another planet. Button Mash being an exception only in the sense that his delusion was more along the lines of being the greatest gamer that ever lived when in fact, technically speaking, they were all just delusional teenagers.

Chrysalis was convinced that she was really someone named Cadence, and that the real Chrysalis had taken over her body somehow just to steal her boyfriend away.The Dazzlings insisted that they were the greatest pony musicians of all time, and that Starswirl the bearded was “so totally jelly of their natural talent” he had them exiled from wherever, only to find themselves in a perpetual hell where high school never ends. Fluffle Puff was rather tight lipped about her belief that she was a raspberry, but everyone knew what she was really thinking.

Laughing Coffin. A group consisting of Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, and Rainbow Dash were candy stripers at the rehab center until they were flagged as being criminally insane during an attempt to kill one of the residents, apparently Starlight had turned a bunch of her friends into mindless zombies and the effects didn't exactly wear off when Discord's game ended. Having met Rarity and Applejack the last time Starlight tried to escape she really couldn't blame them. But, the logic of putting them in the same group as Starlight eluded her.

Finally, there was Nightmare Moon, the only other resident in the rehab center that believed her. She actually believed Sunset Shimmer when she said she came “here,” a world overrun by bat faced tentacle monsters (that mostly resembled hairless apes), through a magic mirror.