Flim, Flam, and the Little Lost Apple Scam · 12:47am May 7th, 2017
Short and to the point. FFLLAS is done out to the eleven chapter point. I'm struggling a little getting Chapter 11 (which has symbolic importance to any Flim-Flam story) to line up just right, but in *theory* I could start posting today. (Which I'm not)
If you're interested, drop me a PM and I'll send you a link to the document. It should be nearly completely finally clean out to Chapter 10 (Tek and Ferret are my heroes) but any careful examination and 'smoothing' of the ending help would be appreciated. What's worse, there's a lot of lying going on in the story, so keeping it all straight has been a pain. Be aware I'm shipping Applejack and Flam in this one, which is the most severe case of Opposites Attract and will most likely gain me a lot of anti-shipping missiles. (Four down, two to go. Rarity and Rainbow Dash.)
Quick sample below, and an introduction to the beautiful Marian, the Mare Scorned:
From the brothers’ descriptions, she could only have been Marian, with that pale pink coat that looked somewhat faded and dusty with a similarly pale cream mane tied up in a tight bun. She looked drained somehow, as if the events of the last year had taken more out of her than a foal and some time, but there was a bumper crop of fire burning behind those golden eyes that bespoke of a lot of pent-up anger, just looking for a pony to take it out on.
And she was looking at Applejack.
“Uh… Hello?” Applejack picked up the folder of statements and stuffed it quickly into her saddle bag. “I’m… ah… sorry for taking up so much of your library’s time,” she added.
There was a long pause where Marian just stood there, not moving. Then she spoke in a flat voice seeming to seethe with acid.
“Rumor has it those two… creatures have been given shelter at your home,” said Marian. Her eyes flashed and she lifted up her chin in defiance. “I thought you were the Element of Honesty.”
“Ah am! Honesty, that is,” said Applejack with one hoof over her chest. “An’ I’m not giving them no shelter, except what they got out at the barn, really. Just keepin’ them in one place while we unwind whatever scheme they were up to.”
“They will lie to you with every word they say,” growled Marian, still standing in the meeting room doorway as if she were glued there. “They will say the nicest things and sound oh-so honest. As they go on, everypony will start to trust them and let their guard down.” She paused to take a breath, and Applejack could see the tremor in her chest as she breathed out. “They will hurt you, far worse than you have ever been hurt before. Please, turn these two criminals into the authorities and let them face justice.”
The last word came out of Marian’s mouth in a near-hiss, and she stood for a long while before turning abruptly on one hoof to leave.
“Wait a sec,” said Applejack almost out of reflex. “Ah know they hurt you and everypony in this town, but they deserve—”
“They deserve far more than to go to jail for the rest of their natural lives,” hissed Marian, still looking away and not meeting Applejack’s eyes. “You’re one of the princess’ friends. Talk to her and have them sent away forever, far from here.” Marian strode away deeper into the library and as much as Applejack wanted to follow her and explain, she knew that would only tear open her wounds and pour salt into them.
It was a very long trip back to Ponyville.
Glad to hear you're back at it. Wanna drop me the new link? I only have the link to the general outlines.
I do like your stories. The two that I've read all the way through, and the one I started reading but never finished. But, I still have a few more chapters of Tomb of Dracula and the Batman encyclopedia to get through. Not to mention, if I were to look over your document I'd be tempted to insert jokes and poke fun of certain things. And, if our sense of humor annihilates togehter, there is the chance it will spark because the proof is in the pudding not in how it was made. I might find time to look it over or not, I wouldn't want to disappoint you before we've even been introduced and I might want to play with you later.
4523006 Well, Flim-Flam is a lower key comedy/drama with a lot less slapstick cannon fire than Changelings, Love and Lollipops, and a lot less long-term drama than Traveling Tutor. It's an attempt at seriousness. Kinda.
This will definitely be an interesting one. The tension between justice and vengeance always makes for good drama.