Aug
5th
2016
maybe if I just quietly blog nobody will notice I was gone for like two months · 8:43pm Aug 5th, 2016
Hey guys a lot of people have been going "Hey obs I'm going to vote this year and I need to know your opinion: Hillary or Trump?"
and I'm like hahahaha obviously neither
I mean neither of their slogans really make me want to vote for them. Trump's is "Make America Great Again" and if you acronymize that you get MAGA, aka Krav Maga, the same martial arts style used by the ninjas who killed my master. Hillary's is "It isn't like you're going to vote for Trump you feeble mammal" and that isn't really snappy enough for my tastes.
So who am I voting for?
HARAMBE 2016
He's a gorilla.
I mean that's really all you need to know about that. Go vote for that gorilla.
HARAMBE 2016 "I'd trust my child with him."
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Obselescence · 1,816 views
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VOTE HARAMBE 2016
Dicks out.
I'm personally voting for Twilight Sparkle myself.
100% behind that.
The day American politics stops being a three ring circus is the day I start giving a crap about it. Until then, my vote goes to our one and only lord and savior:
images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/29200000/PIKACHU-pikachu-29274386-861-927.jpg
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/147/319/1e1.jpg
I'm kinda glad I'm not old enough to vote in this election.
Edit: and now I'm getting ads telling me to vote for Trump. Go figure.
Kool Shit. Maybe Harambe will win. ...Though, so far, it doesn't seem likely.
Sorry Obsy, you can't vote for Harambe. Trump-types got him shot.
#SMOD2016. Burn it all down and give the unicellular life a second shot at the title belt. But seriously, only one of the two had to ask "why can't we use nukes" and that person shouldn't be anywhere near the BigRedButton™.
Seriously?
az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/06/11/636012769664278039-1262123524_flickr.com_Marc-Nozell-620x326.jpg
I bet Harambe isn't promising ponies.
Dicks out for Harambe
That's not how you spell Jill Stein!
Yes I'm a proud socialist. I will defend my views in a contentious comments section of a my little pony fanfiction website.
4133603 Seconded.
4133597 If I could, I would.
Everyone is saying "Dicks out for Harambe," but if I wear a condom while casting my vote does that make me a republican or a democrat?
Well, I guess according to the logic of the facts, without the condom you're doing it for the good of the republic (cuz America) and with the condom you're taking "a" out of "America" and now it's just "Meric". And you're killing your future children.
Does any of this make sense Obs? Or am I just soliciting?
4133652
That still makes him a better choice than Trump. Remember the dead cat's try for president?
iseethefrog.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Bill-For-President.jpg
Now this is a candidate I can get behind.
4133821 It would be unwise to stand in front of him, for sure.
Maybe y'all should do a North Korea thing and make him your eternal leader.
RIP Harambe. President of our hearts.
4133831
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I'm transgender, so if Trump gets elected and packs the court with conservatives, I'm fucked.
Lesser of two eeeevils!
I noticed >:V
I vote for 4133896 cuz some random Brit who approves stories on a pony fanfic site and mods various other things would make a superior, competent president than either candidate at this point.
4133664
Or is it too late to vote Vermin Supreme?
4133673
*moth hissssssssssssss*
Actually, a metal head friend of mine in high school was socialist. I didn't mind. I didn't comprehend the the leftist things he said cuz political talk flies completely over my heady :3 Yeah, he was a swell guy. He's one of the reasons I like Metallica? That's a cool thing.
Is it too late to joke this: Why vote for an evil less than Cthulhu?
Please. Everyone in this blog's comments have apparently forgotten about the real choice here:
img.ifcdn.com/images/03e9d0272e34e00896424569ebf18d0c529bfcb63049a9804d6a7032557a3e00_1.jpg
I'm voting for Obs 2016
As an Australian, I think Trump is bad but I want him to win, for tactical reasons. Australia might follow Hillary into another round of stupid self-destructive wars against Syria and Iran and China and Russia and the Moon and the Mole People, but we would never follow Trump into a war. The Australian public hates Trump too much. And Trump isn't charismatic enough to get us back into an American coalition.
I don't particularly like my tax money and the lives of my fellow citizens being sacrificed to increase the quarterly profits of American military corporations. Which is what Hillary seems to want.
4133673
Doesn't she distrust Vaccines and want to ban pesticides and GMO crops and thinks that WiFi will give children brain cancer?
She seems less of a Socialist and more of a Luddite.
4134170 Oy vey! Slander and and rumors based on out of context snippets. I will reply in more depth when I'm not driving but suffice to say that no, she is not anti-vaccine or anti-science
4133735
Harambe's above political parties man
4133999
Yeeep!
Gorillas always win.
4133604
You mean a two-ring circus, right? The third ring usually sits off in the corner with its Tinker Toys
When the Trumpocalypse comes, at least I'll have my, "Don't blame me, I voted for Harambe!" bumper sticker.
ZOD2016
#VoteBeforeZod
4133796
Wasn't his brain replaced with Trump's in the last year of the strip?
4134170
4134242
4133673
She's anti-GMO. (See: her own campaign promises)
She's "just asking questions" about vaccines - which means that she can say she's not anti-vax all she likes, but actions speak louder than words. She says she's not anti-vax, and then she promotes literally all of the stupid things that anti-vaxxers say. See below (you can find her full comments by searching):
She's also stated that children shouldn't be exposed to wifi because it could harm them.
Jill Stein is absolutely supportive of kooky beliefs. All of those charges are true and the proof comes out of her own mouth or campaign.
So where DID you go, Obs?
If I may ask, that is.
Also Obs almost forgot. Can you ignore the like several dozen death threats I messaged you? Did not know you were gone and thought you were ignoring me for some daft reason. So yeah. Please ignore those. Well, except the one rambling on about Sharpie fumes, a dilapidated truck, some giant Minions plushies and an energetic dog. That's actually my plans to frame my boss for grand larceny. I accidentally sent those to you and equally accidentally deleted my only copy. If you could be so kind, please send that back or I'll have to send a murder of attack ravens with laser pointers to kill you k thnx bye ^.~
I forgot you people even existed.
plz b0ss no ban plz
You left?
Obs, if it makes you feel better, I didn't notice you left.
Harambe 2016: "Just look at those pecs."
I'm sorry, Obs, but Hambre the dead gorilla is far too conservative for my tastes. His festering corpse will do nothing but preserve the status quo. Instead, I'll be voting for a real progressive. One who can actually break through the deadlock in Washington and bring about some long overdue change. Come November, I'll be voting for:
A giant meteor that will destroy the Earth.
HA-HARAMBE?! No way I'm voting for THAT BASTARD!
JEB 2016 OR NOTHING, BABY!