Dec
11th
2015
The "essay due in five hours" kit. · 6:44am Dec 11th, 2015
FINALS.
ESSAYS.
HOMEWORK.
THESE ARE ALL FRIGHTENING THINGS! BUT WE CAN OVERCOME THEM! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!
HAVE YOU BEEN PROCRASTINATING FOR A LONG TIME BUT REALLY REALLY NEED TO STOP!? I HAVE FOUND A SOLUTION!
FIRST!
GO TO YOUR HOMEWORK/ESSAY AND START TYPING IN ALL CAPS NONSENSICAL GIBBERISH! PERHAPS SPRINKLING IN A HEARTY SKRAAAAAAAAAAWWWW EVERY SO OFTEN. THEN SLOWLY TRANSITION YOUR KEYBOARD SMASHING INTO WORDS OF SOME KIND. ONCE YOU FEEL "READY" OPEN THE FOLLOWING TWO TABS:
TAB NUMBER TWO IS A CLOCK COUNTING DOWN! YOU ONLY HAVE AN HOUR AND YOU'VE ALREADY SPENT TEN SECONDS OF IT READING THIS SENTENCE!
GO!
GO!
GO!
WRITE!!!
WRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITE!
I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!!
This is quite the inspirational message! With the music and countdown, I feel all inspired!
Dem hearty skraaaaaaaws do.
Chinchillax fightin' the good fight
I can just imagine this
i.imgur.com/pVaxNyw.gif
Sitting at the desk, hammering away at the keyboard with that music in the background
For those of you who don't have the fortune of knowing: This is what the "enlightened birdmen" in the tags refers to.
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The music, the deadline, and the countdown fills you with DETERMINATION.
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SCRAAAAAAAAAWWWWW!!! THIS IS SO MUCH FUN TO DO!!!! SKREEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
(No really, typing like I'm a member of /r/EnlightenedBirdmen is cathartic in a way I have never experienced before.)
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I got done with one long essay and I lost all steam to finish my next two. But
Yep! That was me all day yesterday.
I put on the music and the countdown and periodically texted a friend motivational messages in all caps. And somehow I got all three essays done by midnight.
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ISN'T TYPING THIS WAY GLORIOUS!!! SCRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!!!!!
3610891 ...What have you linked me to, you deranged rodent?
Do you want to expose the entirrrrrRRRRAAAWperation?
Pretend I'm posting that encouraging scootaloo gif.
DON'T FORGET ALPACAS!
i.imgur.com/wGygPZw.jpg
Good luck with your studies!
I am used to doing this. However, once when I was still in technical school (A high-school level 2 year degree meant to teach you some useful professional skill), I left those the draft to my graduation project. Even worse, there was a bunch of stuff making fun of specific teachers. Luckily we got those back to do the necessary corrections, and the teacher doing that stuff didn't do anything negative, but he did stop to read the comments out loud for the whole class to hear – which was hilarious.
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Oh man, that sounds terrifying. Glad everything worked out okay though.