New Ship, Old Traditions · 1:24am Aug 6th, 2015
I've got me own vessel now, and in the grand tradition of piracy, it must be christened. It is with a hand shaky from alcoholism and a heart proud from the adversity of clicking the "New Account" button and all the trials that followed that I apply the stencil reading "The Everlasting Disappointment" to the side of this canoe while pretending to say a prayer.
Right now I have but a skeleton crew, so there be only one soul here to witness The Everlasting Disappointment go from being a boat to a ship, but someday I'll have the mightiest galleon in this ocean! Or at least a slightly larger canoe, with room for a cooler.
Until then, Monotone Magic, the only person who is currently following me, my story is on your page. Which is linked on your name.
On the off chance anybody else reads this, my story is on Monotone Magic's profile, linked above. It's good 
Nope, couldn't keep a straight face. It's alright. 
No, I'm still lying. It's shit, but you should read it anyway, it's not like you have anything else going on.
