You Can Lead a Pony to Water · 2:26am Jul 3rd, 2015
I'm so, so sorry.
Last Sunday, the NPR quiz (with Will Shortz) was about proverbs, and this was one of them. I think.
Or maybe it wasn't.
Anyway, if ever there was a formulaic Pony does X (in this case, doesn't), this is it. It's crossed with a proverb, and I pretty much told you what was going to happen in the story and chapter title . . . y'all do notice those, don't you?
Well, I don't apologize. My muse has been poking me for days (since Sunday, actually), shouting "hey, listen" in my ear, and this was the only way to shut her up.
Once again, I went without pre-readers, mostly because I figured they'd smack me upside the head and say "what is wrong with you?" So all brilliant misspellings and grammatical errors are entirely my fault. Those, and the whole idea to begin with.
I'd initially planned for it to be a chapter of Not another Pony on Earth, but then it got long, and . . . well. . . .
I don't think there's anything in this story that needs to be mentioned specifically. Y'all probably know the proverb, and I guess if you don't, I can't really give a source. So have another picture of Rainbow Dash:
EDIT: Incidentally, I just wrote what is surely the shortest PoE ever (attached to the aforementioned Not another Pony on Earth). I couldn't help myself. Have a Big Mac.
...but a pencil must be lead?
You know, I seem to recall that last time this happened, I was assured there wouldn't be any repeats. Care to explain?
Well duh we're going to smack you if you keep not letting us help. Too many more strikes of the figurative sort and we'll be forced to head on over and literalize them. Given how much of a pain that'd be for everyone involved, perhaps you might just consider doing things the right way instead, hmm?
. . . I really should just learn to turn my brain off when I read one of your randomfics.
3202143
It just sorta happened.
3202150
Ya know, did I even use the random tag? I'll have to check that.
. . .
I'm not sure what's more upsetting: that you didn't trust us to play along, or that this is something like the third story in a row we weren't allowed to be a part of.
3202907
Dude, I wrote the thing in a two-hour binge, and didn't even proofread it. I'm shocked it's in the feature box.
3202947 Wait, it's in the featured box? I just got here through my feed.
3203131
Yeah. Number 5 right now.
I saw this first in the feature box, didn't see who it was by, and skipped it because most Human/Pony stories that aren't yours aren't very good and it was a weird premise. Then when I checked my feed and saw it was by you, I had one of those "apprehension vs. morbid curiosity" moments and checked it out:
absurdnotions.org/an20000127.gif
I'm not sure if I regret it or not yet.
3201560
It's just nudging the edge of my brain that there's another bad pun to be had here, but I'll be damned if I can think of it.
3203482
<implying that my PoEs are good>
To be fair, I'm not sure if I regret it or not yet, either. It was one of those ideas that just kept nagging at me, and I finally had to do something about it
Did you ever watch Futurama? There's a line (over a commercial break) which pretty much sums it up (I'm relying on my faulty memory, but this is close):
Or, perhaps more apt: "You've watched it; you can't unwatch it."
Really, all I ever hoped from this story was a few chuckles and then a groan at the end.
3204520
I can assure you, you hurdled that bar.