Chapter 17/18 "Food with Benefits" has been retconned. Now 20% less controversial! + Some words of thanks. · 2:51pm Jul 23rd, 2012
Those of you who know me from my previous work, know I'm generally not afraid to be a bit controversial at times. There's been murders and tortures aplenty, but never before had there been any kind of "rape" scene in my work. There's a reason for that: I know the reaction to it is always strong, and I, personally, do not enjoy writing or reading it either.
And yet for the past few days, there's been controversy about "Of Maids and Mistresses" due to a rape scene. So what happened there?
Simply put, I never saw it as or intended it to be rape in way. I was shooting for a reluctant seduction, but I messed up. I failed to correctly write down the scene, and while it looked alright to me (because I knew what it was supposed to be) it didn't look alright to some other people. When comments about it first popped up, I tried to reason my way through it a bit, downplaying it as "not a big deal", mainly because I wanted to be free of an accusation I was uncomfortable with. I realise now that was a very bad way of dealing with it, and I apologise to all people who've been involved in the commenting back-and-forth. No harsh words were spoken on either side, but it's still a discussion I shouldn't have taken up to begin with. Again, sorry.
Thanks to all of your help, I have managed to learn a valuable lesson about wording in stories, and about how what is clear to one person can be muddy or suspect in the eyes of someone who does not have the same insight into the story that you, as the author, do possess. I have thus, for the first time ever, retconned a part of a story I already published. If you read chapter 17/18 again, I hope you will find the controversial element has been dealt with.
This is not me "giving in to complaints", this is me using constructive criticism to make that chapter what it was supposed to be in the first place, had I not screwed it up so badly.
I hope that you'll see this as a gesture of peace from my side, and a form of redemption, the way Goethe tried to redeem himself by rewriting Die Leiden des jungen Werthers to be more anti-suicide, after the first version of his book (which romanticized suicide) caused a suicide wave across Europe.
Thanks again for helping me realise the mistake, and I hope we can now go back to the story we all enjoy--me in writing it, and you in reading it.
Regards,
-Unahim
Hey, bro, I'm on IRC right now for yah.
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Rainbow_Dash.png
Now im like shrugging, i get that you never intended it to be seen as rape but it came out that way and its stuck in my mind like it not being rape was stuck in your.
re-read but again it remains that Dash said no and Twilight forced herself and Trixie on to her, regardless what gender preference there is you realize that she shows no care for her friends wishes even if its not rape, either way that remained the same and in my head its crippling their friendship (and the elements of harmony?), that was my main issue, that i probably totally failed to express. I find it much worse when someone you trust does it and missuses your trust and thats where my "rage" for this came from.
But lets move on, i expect a world ending, reality shattering ending from this story with how high your setting the ladder with Twilight's corruption.
Either that or a flat but funny one that wont make to much sense. 
245490
Oh come on, where do you see this "no" this time? Maybe that first, unannounced kiss, but I can show you hundreds, thousands, perhaps even millions of popular stories in our modern culture where one character kisses the other out of the blue, without any sort of warning, and provided that that character was fine with it after the act, nobody ever issued rape accusations against them. The second kiss she leans in to herself, an obvious element of consent, and then she gives verbal consent to let Twilight show her "more" right after that.
The sudden inclusion of Trixie could be an element, but she never says no, and--even though this time around she is completely unrestricted in her movement--she does not protest or resist. If it was non-consentual, I think she'd have at least tried to struggle or at least asked the other two to stop (in which case they would have, so this "no care for her friends wishes" is also not true). There are more languages than just the verbal one, and more ways of consenting than speaking it out loud.
It is, to be honest, a little bit upsetting that you continue to insist I wrote something I did not want to write. If you had a clear and indisputable point, I'd understand, but to me it feels like you're just making a conscious effort to read it the way you are, and it makes me a bit... frustrated.
For comparison: http://tinyurl.com/dxwmnhm
Leia physically pushes Han away, tells him to get off of her, tells him to "stop that", informs him that her sexual preferences do not include him, and then shakes her head... yet he still kisses her. She even flees after the act, exactly like Dash in the fic.
Amount of rape accusations Han has to deal with: 0.
Meanwhile here, of all those elements we only have "informs her that her sexual preferences do not include her", followed by a kiss, yet here it is rape.
Honestly, I don't know what I'm doing wrong by this point.
(and if it wasn't the kiss, I understand it even less, as she obviously and willingly goes along with everything after that)
If it's any consolation, I didn't think the original chapter went too over the top, though I agree the revised chapter works much better at getting your intentions across. Kudos.
245563
you cant compare kissing to eating carpet really. Han didnt bend her over and then later let her go.
But back to the story, I said thats how i saw it and that its stuck in my head now, i didnt mean to upset you and im not say it is rape at this point. But its stuck in my head and thats my problem.
Then i expressed what i would see the consequences being (your story still lacking any means there will be some at a later point so i speculated, no matter what).
Im not trying to upset you and im sorry. Ill just shut up now lol.
245573
It is :p
245586
I've simply misunderstood then, my apologies. I cannot retcon your memories, of course ^^
And yeah, the Han thing was purely for the kiss, the other elements I touched upon separately ^^
Honestly, I never really saw a problem with it. I was expecting Rainbow Dash's internal conflict over it to be explained in a later chapter, which would hopefully bring it more into perspective.
When reading an incomplete story, you literally do not have the whole story. So parts that may seem confusing or controversial at first may be explained or better fleshed out in later chapters. The problem is, not everyone waits to see what will happen, so they're left with half a story, and only have that to draw upon when making their opinions. It would be like reading only the first book of 'The Lord of the Rings', then bitching about the horrible ending. If you never read the second and third book, a large part of the story makes no sense.
When I read the scene, it did seem forced. But Rainbow seemed more reluctant rather than desperate to get away. To me, her reaction after it was over seemed more of shock at what she had just done, and how she felt about it, rather than what had been done to her.
Of course, I may just be more twisted than the average person, so eh. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Twilight_Sparkle.png
246170
Well, I'm still planning to go into it more in upcoming chapters, and if like this less people have a problem with it, it's good, I think.
246173
I look forward to it. Internal conflict is always the best kind of conflict. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Twilight_Sparkle_lolface.png
Like I said, forced isn't always the same thing is rape. True, I can see why people could confuse the two, but one has to take into account many things.
For one, Twilight and Trixie honestly believed that what they were doing was for Rainbow Dash's own good. They believe that their friend is repressing herself for nothing more than maintaining a self image that she would be better off without. In a sense, it would be the same as forcing an alcoholic to got to an AA meeting. But considering that, in this case, the issue at hand is repressed sexuality, rather than excessive drinking, the subject becomes a lot more touchy. What Twilight and Trixie did, basically, was to force Rainbow Dash to confront her own urges and feelings, to push her into making a decision she would have just avoided if left on her own. It still remains to be seen if what they did was the right choice. If they are right about Rainbow Dash, she'll have to decide if she wants to open up and admit to herself her feelings, or close them off again and continue living her lie. If they were wrong, then they made a huge mistake, and will have to some how patch up what's left of their relationship with the pegasus.
I can understand how a lot of people would take the entire scene as being just rape, however. But honestly, I don't see it as any fault of the writer. If taken as nothing more than the visual and physical images, it looks a lot like rape. What people seem to be missing is the internal elements. Rainbow Dash has the inclinations, but it's clear she's been ignoring them, keeping up the act of just being a normal mare. It's likely she's afraid what people would think of her if they knew she had an attraction to other mares. She's likely been doing this so long that she's started to believe it herself. Twilight is also likely very astute to Rainbow Dash's feelings and actions, and has probably guessed that this is the case.
So you have the 'victim' who if she was honest would welcome and enjoy the encounter (and, clearly, she did enjoy it). And an 'assailant' who is doing this, not out of lust or malice, but rather trying to help one of her friends in a situation where they would be unwilling to help themselves. Taking the internal context of the characters and the situation, it's hard for me to see the scene as simply an act of rape. But if you take all of that away, and present nothing but the simple, unexplained actions, then it does seem to be nothing more than rape.
everyponyshrug.deviantart.com