A call for stories: "Versebreaker" anthology? · 11:35pm Mar 22nd, 2015
(Tagging Fugue State due to discussion of sequel.)
Those of you who follow the Writeoff Association's monthly competitions just learned that one of my entries to this round's competition — 4th District Court, Canterlot, 11:35 a.m. — just ran away with the gold medal amid widespread praise. It's clearly a cool story. Will you get to see it posted here on FIMFiction?
Short answer: Not without some help.
Long answer:
It's currently 650 words. With a bit of effort, I could extend the scene to hit the 1k minimum for standalone publication. However, if I did, it would run straight into the wall of FIMFiction moderation, since there's also an explicit ban on stories in script format.
I'm not going to de-format it, because (as the comment thread agrees) it's the formatting which makes it work. I suspect the only good way to tackle the moderation problem is to write enough "supplemental material" in traditional prose for that to pass moderation on its own, and have "4th District Court" be published as merely a subsidiary chapter of a larger work (since the story at that point would not be in script format, just a fragment of it). That would kinda take the wind out of 4DC's sails.
That's not to say that couldn't be a cool idea. One thing I introduced in the story was the idea of a "Versebreaker," a pony whose entire job is to bring musical numbers to a screeching halt. (If the idea sounds cool of Equestria being a world with literal spontaneous musical numbers, go read Fugue State, posthaste.) Everyone in the Writeoff review thread seemed to love the Versebreaker idea, and it would be cool to dig more deeply into the Versebreakers' perspective, and the way in which they solve problems.
I'm tempted to write an explicit Fugue State sequel in which Lyra becomes a Versebreaker ... but to be honest, while that sounds fun, that's not currently high-priority enough to derail the other commitments in my wheelhouse.
So here's an idea: I'm throwing this to the winds.
ETA: (source)
I'd love to assemble a short-fic anthology about Versebreakers, and include 4th District Court as one of the central chapters of the collection. So if the idea of a pony whose job is stopping musical numbers sparks something in your imagination, please write up your own spin on the idea! (Bonus Horizon points if you write it in Fugue State's continuity, but totally not necessary.)
Let's say a minimum of 400 words, max 8000. Submit stories to me via PM, via e-mail to horizon {at} tomorrowlands dot org, or via a link to Google Docs (here or privately).
If I get at least two other submissions in the next two weeks, I'll curate the collection and post it with as many reviews and signal-boosts as I can wheedle out of my ponyfriends (this could be a great chance for exposure!), and I'll also set aside some time for that Lyra story I just mentioned. If not, 4th District Court gets buried in my short story collection, and the Fugue State sequel goes onto the general to-do list, where all my best ideas sit around twiddling their thumbs until I discover the eighth day of the week.
Edit: Per my other post, the official submission deadline to be included in the initial posting is Thursday morning, April 9, when I wake up and check my messages. (I'm on Pacific time, so submit your story by 9 AM PDT (=4 PM GMT).)
I don't really do well with prompts... but I'll see if I can manage at least 400 words in two weeks' time.
As a side note to folks reading the comments: While I was on Derpibooru tracking down some spot art to add to this blog post, I also ran across this amazing Sonata Dusk pic, and suddenly I realized: if you take the second Equestria Girls movie as canon, there is way more meat to the "Versebreaker" idea than I initially suspected.
2900747
Yay
Has someone told you that this would fail as being script format? I'd think it's in a gray area, and while it does have some script-like elements to it, it reads more like a dialogue-only story. You might try PMing one of the mods to explain what you have here and seeing what they think about it. If they agree with you, they'd probably approve the story themselves, rather than take the chance of another random mod being on the same page, as it were. I'd try obselescene or Alexstrazsa.
EDIT: Oh, and I'm working on a Zecora story right now, where I've crippled myself with constraints, so I'm currently getting about 50 words per hour done when I actually have time to write. So no chance of me taking on anything requiring a poetic structure any time soon.
Oh, see, now:
My first thought is, "How can we get Scansion from 'Thou Goddess' involved in this?" But ding dang it, H! I've got a squirrel story I'm in the middle of!
Mike
I will try.
But it may be hard if I do not have somepony to remind me about trying because of brain problems. But I will try to remember to try!
Another alternative would be to post it on Fimfiction but just not click "publish", directing people to it via other means. It'd never show up in the feature box and stuff, but eh, depends what that means to you. :)
I mention this because just the other day I came across Not a Twilight Sparkle Story, which Obselecence used this trick with due to it being way under 1000 words and which still got a significant bit of attention.
Hm. How do I get a Final Words style entry that will satisfy both conditions? This could take some work.
omg that was an aweasome ficlet!
<notes the existence of this blogpost>
oooo interesting! Maybe I'll try a crossover with Buffy the Vampire Slayer? There's an episode where someone summons a demon that makes everyone in town randomly burst into song, dance, and occasionally flames.
Nahh...
My idea for this is solidifying. Although, I think if I write it as I think it works best, it totally isn't going to fit the overall tone of any of the other entries.
And ultimately, a good part of its overall effectiveness will probably depend on my ability to conform to a tricky style.
Hmm... That image has me imagining Sweetie Belle fleeing in instinctual terror from a versebreaker. And Vinyl Scratch. And pretty much any other pony with a musical talent.
Yes, the more I think about this, the more I like it...
This idea seems perfect for a hard boiled detective spoof, like Humphrey Bogart if he acted all whiskey and cigar-serious about stopping people from singing instead of while solving murder mysteries. Someone should go write that.
2900770
That's a good point. No, I have not explicitly been told that 4th District Court would fail moderation (I'm mostly just going by the recent troubles with Lunnas Ache, which Obselescence rejected even after communication with the author).
Having come up with the idea of using 4DC to springboard an anthology, I like that and think I'll stick with it (at least for the two weeks I've announced as a writing period). However, if the anthology falls flat, that's a good thought as a fallback.
2900785
Ooh, especially post-Goddess Scansion.
... I suppose that if I got your brain going while you're overly occupied, it's only fair that you do the same in return.
2900818
I remember when "Not A Twilight Sparkle Story" went live -- it's actually part of a weird recursive sequence of stories Obselescence wrote, each of which were posted separately and only one of which was published (you can see it in his "Stories" list). The idea was that people would start reading the first and then follow the internal links to the subsequent ones.
That said, if I were going to write-but-not-publish it, I think I might as well drop it in my short stories collection, where people can stumble across it without hitting my signal boosts.
2900859
I look forward to whatever you come up with!
Oh you.
2900991
Amusingly, if you did so, that would bring this whole thing full circle. Fugue State was explicitly inspired by that episode, so much so that my original title for the story was "Once More With Feeling" before my prereader kicked me into changing it. (For which I am grateful.)
The idea of a Versebreaker would work beautifully with the Buffy crossover and the literal demon!
2901030
One of the cool things about anthologies — and the Writeoffs, too — is that you get to see a wide variety of interpretations of the core concept, some of which approach from a crazy angle like a car careening through a red light into an intersection, and slamming sideways into your brain to leave a real impact. If you can pull something off that heads at right angles to what everyone else writes, I think it'll just end up all the more memorable.
I'm not too worried about getting stories which all fold into each other cleanly, not with nothing more than "write about ponies who stop musical numbers for a living" as a prompt. It could be cool to all work from a shared base as well, but there's not nearly enough established for me to force that (or want to).
2901075 2901084
I'm more and more glad I followed my whim and made this a Thing. If I'd just flown this one solo, I wouldn't be hearing so many awesome ideas ...
ooh that's intriguing… I'd love to contribute, but I don't know if I'll be able to do something in time, be it 400 or 400,000 words
Fingers crossed!
All I can say is that it's one heck of a catchy, funny and clever story.
2901084
2901094
I'm going to call dibs on that idea unless you want if, Hoof. I'll need to do some research, as well as actually read Fugue State, but I've got an idea.
Horizon, would you be all right with people writing in the 4th District Court setting/universe, or would you prefer standalones? Either is fine by me.
2901094
Well, you see, the Internet IS the Singularity. It is the human hivemind. It produces many wonders and things that would drive a lesser species mad.
2901727
The plan is to publish them all in a single collection, so relying on existing continuity for context shouldn't be a problem.
.... such as it is. I can't imagine that there's much in 4th District Court's 550 words to build you a solid foundation.
It's not a universe so much as a suggestion. You're probably going to have to roll your own even if you make them fit together.
That said, having stories sharing a continuity would be awesome.
2901741
Yeah, continuity might be the wrong word.
I was thinking of using the same Versebreaker pony, and show his side of the scene. Give him a personality and a backstory and all that jazz. It'd be meta-background-pony-fanfiction.
We'll see. I've got some thinking to do.
I'm surprised to find that for such a basic concept, I'm led down a lot of amusing side thoughts. Does Manehattan have a team of Versebreakers on call to prevent interruption of normal business every time a pony from the sticks with a golden voice and a big head full of dreams strolls into town? (Did Pinkie sneak off to bribe said ponies so Rarity could have her big solo and montage in Rarity Takes Manehattan?)
Free idea for anyone who's interested: the Versebreaker employed by the big Crystal Museum in the Crystal Empire normally has a pretty easy job, until the Cutie Mark Crusaders arrive on a field trip. Of course they prove to be stubbornly impenetrable to bad rhymes and when you deliberately throw them off key, they keep singing anyways.
(Cue CMC finishing their solos to find themselves in the middle of a collection of priceless crystal artifacts that have all shattered into a million pieces)
2902280
CANNOT
UPVOTE
HARD
ENOUGH
2901727
Sure, so long as there's a darkly seductive femme fatale, analogies slick as hair product, too much bourbon, and an old detective that talks tough, gets beat up a lot, and only takes the cases he knows are hopeless.
2903261
You've got it, boss! *salutes*
To be honest, it probably won't end up like that - my ideas are spiralling in all the wrong directions.
Good! You're not going to significantly alter it just to publish it by itself. You've thought of a good work around instead. ^.^
2903261
2903689
So, I've produced a short piece about the Deep Psychological Trauma of being a versebreaker, the horror and the ponies lost on the job
.
Something in the style of an old Noir novel. It is really short, needs editing and all, and I am more than happy to throw it at other people to see if they can improve it or do something else with it, maybe in a shared effort.
Interested?
2904546
Verily so. I'll shot you a PM.
2900747 2900799 2900859 2900937 2901030 2901084 2900991 2901302 2901727 2904546
Okay, now that I'm done saturation-bombing replies, some number of you may want to know that I've already sent horizon a possible chapter of the story, and he suggested I provide the link here, so that more eyes can go over it and maybe coordinate with it. You can find it here. Comments are enabled and encouraged.
2904546 2905103 2906083 et.al.
I feel like I should specify that I suggested to both Kettle and FOME that they post about their stories here, not out of any concern for quality, but because this thread is a good place to centralize discussion of submitted chapters. If all y'all feel like chipping in prereading thoughts, and/or use each other's ideas as springboards, and/or keep abreast of which ideas have been written/claimed, please speak up!
I invite anyone who has a story in Google Docs to allow comments from the public and drop the doc link here in this thread, if you're interested in feedback from other Versebreaker authors. I'll try to do the same with anything I write for the project.
As for personal contributions: I'm thinking of doing a brief little fight scene with a Versebreaker neutralizing a siren, as a prologue to the collection to add an up-front hook (which won't bug the moderators like 4th District Court would); and possibly an interstitial or two with Fugue State's Lyra wrestling with a Versebreaker job offer. If someone else has their heart set on either of those two ideas, though, I'm happy to relinquish them.
I'm about 5000 words in on mine, which is AUish and probably very overwrought and definitely intensely styled in a way that I'm not sure people will like. Expect a link once I finish it (1000 more words? 2000?) and have the chance to do a full personal edit pass. I'll definitely appreciate some eyes.
2906083 2903689 2903261 2901302 2900991 2900937 2900799 2900785 2900747
So, seeing as we are doing it out in the open, here.
It's short and obviously needs some work, and can be expanded if the idea seems somewhat good.
2906200 I call the siren idea.
2906233
Cool! Look forward to seeing it.
2906302
Cool! Look forward to seeing it.
… whoa, deja vu.
I feel like I pounded this out in a fevered haze befitting the story, and I, uh, hope that your 8,000 word maximum is a recommendation, horizon. (Sorry!
)
Taking advice and etc. here.
Re: not publishable: Someone has already mentioned entering it as a story but not doing the final publish step. The other alternative I thought of was just to post it as a blog post. That way it's in fimfiction and commentable but not in contention for the front page nor subject to as many constraints.
Re: ideas: It's intriguing to see there are lots of ideas here. The only idea that has popped into my head so far was to see a battle between a versebreaker and kapellmeister. After all, a line ending in orange can certainly be worked around: go for a near rhyme, change the rhyming scheme and rhyme with a different line, use it as a kick to different meter / rhyme scheme, "even though he washes well he always ends up sort of smelly". How might it go? The kapellmeister would laugh maniacally at a rookie versebreaker trying to stop her with something cliché as "orange". The grizzled veteran would throw in a line from time to time while the rookie keeps trying and failing to stop the musical juggernaut, with increasing panic. Then the veteran pulls in the threads and cinches the song closed, singing the kapellmeister right into custody.
(The other 'verse-breaker I thought up was OP-OC-a-lips-oh, the mary sue alicorn who keeps Twilight, Celestia, and Discord in her harem.
)
2907993
brb unfollowing you so that I can follow you for this
...
Anyway, I don't plan to impose a hard wordcount cap; we can certainly make 9000 work. The point of the limit was to avoid the (admittedly remote) possibility that someone got taken by a fey mood and wrote a novella. I didn't want the compilation to end up being 90% the work of a single author. (The more folks in the anthology, the less of an issue that becomes.)
2908203
Oh you.
I like the idea of a kapellmeister though. That would make a great supervillain name.
My idea is starting to coalesce, I can't decide if I want to use a background character or an OC. Either way, it will be from a (possibly) battle-worn verse-breaker's perspective
Well thats a lovely little diddy! Makes me sad I haven't had time to participate in the writoffs as of late.
And reminds me I need to finish "Winter Clap Up".
2908612 et al.
OK, so, surprisingly, I've actually got enough expansion on my idea to put together a vignette. (Sad fact, I was so busy thinking about this I even ran a red light.) Count me in!
Excerpt:
Hopefully I'll get my current ideas typed in to a public Google Doc by the end of the weekend and everyone can take a gander.
That said, anyone up for a little anti-poetry contest? I have the setting but I don't know how the battle will go. I thought it would be interesting to see how you guys would try to stump the kapellmeister while I try to work around it.
Here's my small contribution: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1d8dcy9lKs3e9YpfXBcVPOIsyxHJZEsqQOdhI3z_Vfdk/edit
This is a day in the life of Sour Note, a young versebreaker struggling with his job due to his meek and quiet demeanor. Please do not comment on the format or length. This was mostly just to get a couple of ideas down. It can be properly formatted for FimFiction when the time comes, and I can easily add a couple more ideas (and write what's actually there better) to help it reached the requested 400-word minimum.
Otherwise, feel free to comment.
This is very amusing, and I'm looking forward to see where all of this goes.
It took the better part of a week for inspiration to strike. (Partly because a key piece of the inspiration didn't exist until yesterday.) Now I've got an idea --well, something that claims to be an idea-- by way of a completely unrelated notion (setting?) of mine.
I have no idea if I'll be able to write it before the week is out -- if I'm able to write it at all. I'll get back to you with status if/as I progress.
Are humans okay, ie at all in any way if I can do enough justification? I feel it's evidence of shitty writing for asking, but the idea calls for the presence of humans to make the poor excuse for a joke work. (They're at least justified in the other idea of mine that forms roughly half the source material.)
Here's my contribution. It's a tad… odd, to say the least. I'm not sure it really works, or fits in with the verse-breaker mythos.
Description:
Curio the latest in a long line of caretakers of a magic portal. A portal that, if opened, would unleash unspeakable horrors upon Equestria. Thankfully, the portal is sealed with a musical spell. Unfortunately, the portal is directly under Ponyville.
Length: 1.2k
Read it here
Comments, suggestions, edits,
and derisive laughterare welcome2917860
Excerpt looks good. I look forward to seeing where it goes!
I think showing off your anti-poetry is half the fun of writing a versebreaker story. (Unless you cheat, which is reasonable. There's no reason to reject the great writing resources of the Internet.) That said, I did remind folks to check the comments section here, so someone might take you up on it.
2918216 2919441
Awesome! I'll try to take an edit pass through in the next day or two. (Looks like someone already beat me to it.)
2919383
I don't have up-front objections to the inclusion of humans. Heck, I wrote Mark of Destiny, a Human In Equestria story, for the writeoffs a few months back and won third place with it. Consider this under quasi-Writeoff rules: I'm not gonna put content restrictions up front (though I'm gonna shoot for a T rating for the anthology, so in the unlikely event someone writes Versebreaker clop, it'll have to go in a separate collection or something). If you have an idea you think people will enjoy and you want to write it, go for it. If you write a bad feghoot and the reaction is a collective facepalm, that's on you.
As promised, here's a link to my work in progress. Comments welcome. Tone's all over, since I seem to be more focused on clever that good. I probably should go back and trim the cruft, but only once I've satisfied my need for word play. Nowhere near done yet, but hey, a deadline! It could happen...
Edit: OK, did some editing and wrote up to the kapellmeister's entrance. I'm liking this...
2918216
2929629
2919441
Comments dropped into the docs.
2934927
Thanks!
I've updated mine to address the suggestions and such
So after reading 4th district in the write-off, today I had the odd impulse to google 'versebreakers' at work, and was suitably amused by the post.
Evening rolls around and I was just sitting around minding my own business, but then words started happening.
Apparently we're sharing links, so you can look at the result here, if you're so inclined.
2936371
Great! I took a look through and left comments.
2936818
Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.
2934927
Wow, awesome feedback. Thanks! I'll mention here when I've had a chance to incorporate it and push forward.