Critique Review: Daring Do and the Daughter of Heroes · 5:15pm Mar 4th, 2015
The Critique aimed, pulling back the trigger. A loud click echoed throughout the shop. He pulled the trigger again and again. Clicks emanate all around him as he pointed the gun in seemingly random directions.
He pointed the gun at the cashier and pulled the trigger several times, every time giving another click.
“Whoa, careful there, Annie Oakley!” the cashier said as he placed his hooves on the Critique’s weapon, lowering it towards the ground.
The Critique gave a grin. “I don’t need to be careful, I’ve got a gun!”
The cashier reached down behind the counter and picked up a suitcase. He places it on top of the counter. “Well, you’ll probably want the accessory kit.”
Those words catch the Critique’s attention as he turns to the stallion, pulling out several items from the suitcase. “A holster.”
The Critique’s grin widened with a nod. “Oh, yeah.”
“Bandelier.” The stallion held up a strap with pockets that traveled all around it. Each pocket carrying its own bullet. “Silencer.” He presented a silence muzzle for the gun. “Loudener.” Another muzzle but looked much like a megaphone. “Speed Cocker.”
A wide smile appeared across the Critique’s face. “Ooo, I like the sound of that one!”
The stallion then attached a large muzzle to the barrel of the gun, making it look more like a rocket launcher than a gun. “And this is for shooting down enemy alicorns.”
The Critique shrugged. “Meh, I don’t really need one of those.” His eyes glanced away as he whispered under his breath. “Not yet, anyway.”
With the speed of a bullet, the Critique reached over the counter, trying to rip the gun out of the cashier’s hooves. “Just give me my gun!”
The cashier wrestled with the Critique, fighting his grip. “Sorry, the law requires a five day waiting period. We’ve got to run a background check.”
The Critique’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped. “Five days?! But,” his voice got to a higher pitch and he got up to the cashier’s face, with the saddest eyes he could conjure, “I want it now!”
Silence fell upon the room as the two simply stared into each other’s eyes. Finally, the cashier’s eyes narrowed. “What are you doing?”
The Critique shrugged and turned his face back into his scowling frown. “I don’t know. It works when the Cutie Mark Crusaders do it.”
The Critique reached across the counter, grabbing the gun once more, mumbling under his breath to let the gun go. Several moments of pulling back and forth and the cashier finally freed the gun from the Critique’s grip.
The Critique growled as he stomped his hoof. “I’d kill you if I had my gun.”
The stallion simply glared at him. “Yeah, well, you don’t.”
The Critique stomped out of the gun shop, grumbling under his breath about how stupid and messed up the law was.
***
God damn, fucking, piece of shit gun shop. Making me wait five days for a fucking gun.
Hello, everypony. I am the Critique and here we are with another review.
We all love new characters. The fans seemed to jump on the bandwagon of new characters, whether they are good or not. Though some characters completely deserve the popularity they get, such as Maud Pie. Others like Sunset Shimmer are popular despite being terrible.
I’m not mentioning characters like Tenderhoof or Flash Sentry because they got the popularity they deserved in the end because they were awful.
And if you like those characters, that’s fine. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and I’m not trying to make you feel bad for liking those characters. I just feel sometimes people tend to jump on bandwagons with new characters, writing stories about them because they know that’s what’s going to be popular.
And I know there are some artists out there who just write the characters just because they find them interesting. And to tell the truth, I don’t think our character today is all that interesting to begin with. Daring Do.
I mean, there’s potential for a character to be told from this, but nothing solid as far as the show goes. I’m sure other media gives her more detail of who she is, but she doesn’t seem that interesting to me. Hell, even her main villain, though carrying a cool design, wasn’t anything special to me.
Her only character that I found that was interesting was Dr. Caballeron. The history with Daring Do was the only thing that intrigued me. It was mentioned that Dr. Cablleron was Do’s partner at one point, but that he turned the other cheek for money. Why? Who was he? What was he like? Was his relationship with Daring Do intimate? Were they just friends? Colleagues? Father/daughter?
That was more interesting to me.
Again, if you like Daring Do, more power to you. I just don’t think she’s a very interesting character, without proper support.
But, will this story change my mind about her? Well, let’s dig into Daring Do and the Daughter of Heroes by Some Bad Scarecrow.
First thing I want to point out is the date that the story is published. I know I don’t tend to do that, but this one stuck out to me.
See, the episode Daring Don’t aired in the United States on December 7th of 2013.
This story was published on December 8th of 2013!
Wow… Not even a day after the episode aired you write this story… Way to jump on that bandwagon quick. Was the feature box really that important?
Okay, maybe that was a bit harsh. After all, the story may have deserved its place in the feature box. And maybe it wasn’t about the feature box at all. Maybe it was about the story that needed to be told and that the story was passionate about it.
… Screw that, I’m going with jumping to conclusions.
Our story begins at the end of Daring Don’t, further proving that jumping to conclusions is the best kind of jumping, with Daring Do feeling down about returning to her mundane, mistrusting lifestyle.
You get used to it after a couple years. Besides, you’re a big selling author. I’m lucky if I can get my stories off the ground by throwing them against the wall!
The third paragraph of the story reveals that Rainbow Dash is actually the daughter of Daring Do!
Rainbow Dash was her daughter, and now, after 19 and a half years, she saw her all grown up, her biggest fan and a heroine in her own right.
Wow… way to keep that mystery alive.
Yeah, kind of a big issue to be throwing at us at the beginning of the story. We haven’t even gotten settled and already we are hit with this huge revelation. Don’t you want to build up to it more? Save it for a more dramatic reveal?
Daring Do decides that it is time to make things right and heads back home. She arrives at her house which had been ransacked earlier by the thugs. Also, I’d like to point out that the main six just watched Daring Do get attacked by the villains in the episode. You know, instead of helping!
But, I’m getting off track!
Daring Do goes back home and starts to reminisce about Rainbow Dash when she was a baby. And honestly, I feel like there is something missing in all this. Again, this could be just the build up to this news is pretty weak. The story just tells us and really doesn’t give us a chance to question it or even accept it. Hell, maybe that’s because the character in the story already knows. And that it isn’t shocking or anything, or takes us by surprised. It’s more of acknowledging it.
Wouldn’t this have been better if it was taken from the point of view of Rainbow Dash, instead of Daring Do? Rainbow Dash wouldn’t have known, so we would have been as surprised as she was discovering this. There could have been a huge mystery behind it, with Rainbow Dash questioning why Daring Do would have a picture of her. I don’t know. I feel like this is a very big missed opportunity.
Hell, even if Daring Do hinted at something more between her and Rainbow Dash during her point of view, but the news never getting revealed until it was told to Rainbow Dash. That way the mystery would have been kept alive and we would have reacted the same as Rainbow Dash, making it easier to relate to Rainbow Dash as well as Daring Do.
But whatever, Daring Do decides to dove into days past and detect Dash’s dad. During which, Do has doubt of Dash’s desire to have her dawn the description of mother.
What, so my alliteration could use some work, deal with it!
No, she told herself. You lost the right to call her yours when you left her here, on the porch of her father's place. You don't get to call yourself her mother until, or if, she accepts you back into her life.
By the way, thanks for leaving me here and throwing me away. Good to know that your career was more important than a pony. But what do I care? As long as I’m in your will, I’ll feel much better!
Daring meets with Dash’s dad and the duo discuss if Do should be in Dash’s life.
Dash’s dad does detail that Dash was a dedicated reader of the Daring Do books and describes how he deduced Dash’s design to allow Do to determine the denouement of the story.
She wrote me letters about how she was 'so into' the Daring Do novels. Then I heard about how the next novel was delayed and I knew for a fact that little Dashie would go off searching for the author and try and force her to finish," he let out a small chuckle. "I wouldn't have been at all surprised if she broke your wings, tied you up in her basement and forced you to write novels just for her."
*Scribbles on a notepad*Oh… just a side project I’m working on… Just ignore it… For now… At least…
Also, is this really something you say to your wife after god knows how many years?!
No wonder she left.
Rainbow Blitz, Dash’s father, starts to go over how much Dash had grown and details her life a bit. Daring Do tries to speak, but Blitz isn’t really interested, stating that Do wasn’t there for her daughter and had left her for whatever reason.
Frankly, I’m with Blitz on this one. What the hell was Do’s problem that she couldn’t at least explain why she left Dash? Was it because of the enemies she made during her adventures?! That’s all fine and good, but you couldn’t tell them! Explain to the father why you were leaving! You didn’t have to explain to them where you were going, just tell them that you have to leave and why! They’d be mad, yeah! But they’d be far less mad that you aren’t just leaving them to fend for themselves!
How hard would it have been to do this?!
Do: Honey! There are terrorists that are trying to kill me and the only way I can make sure you and our daughter is safe is to run away and never return! Love our daughter lots and tell her I love her every night! Bye! Kiss, kiss, hug, hug!
Seriously?! Was that just too difficult?!
Blitz draws out degrading Do by dropping her books, designating different destinations during her trips.
"Daring Do and the Golden Trumpet, Daring Do and the Topaz Tome, Daring to and Ruby, bucking, Carbuncle!
Her next books were about Sephiroth the Islamic Deity and Bahamut the Dragon King.
Do breaks down and declares her desire to see Dash and to donate her days to Dash’s life.
Dash’s dad decides to dismiss her mistakes and decides she deserves to see Dash.
So, as Dash’s dad starts to explain what to expect from Dash…
”Don't..." he pat her on the head. "Don't worry about it, Daring. Just remember, she might take it differently seeing you as her mother for the first time. I'm not saying she'll automatically hate you, but remember that this is the first time," he looked down to see that she'd fallen asleep on him.
Well, that was a bitch move. He was in the middle of a sentence. At least have the decency to hear him out!
After Daring Do’s power nap, apparently confronting the fact that you abandon your child really takes it out of you, she flies off to Ponyville to meet with Rainbow Dash. She’s nervous at what to do and isn’t sure how to tell Rainbow Dash.
Daring Do finally meets up with Dash and Dash preforms her normal fangirl routine.
"Daring!" She shouted at the top of her lungs. "What are you doing here? I thought you had to work on that book for me... I mean," she let out an awkward laugh. "For all of your adoring fans out there!"
The life of celebrity is a tough one. But we march on, forever more!
If you are a celebrity, than I am Madonna.
Shut up! Who asked you?!
Daring Do asks to talk to Rainbow Dash in private and they make their way to Sugar Cube Corner.
Yes, because nothing says private like a PUBLIC PLACE WHERE PONIES ARE ALL AROUND YOU! I don’t mean to be rude, but wouldn’t the moment when you tell the daughter, that you left on her father’s doorstep when she was a baby, the identity of her mother bring out a few … oh… I don’t know… Emotions! And that you are subjecting her in A PUBLIC PLACE where those emotions might be on display for everypony! Wouldn’t a more secluded place be more appropriate to turn Rainbow Dash’s entire world upside down?! Wouldn’t that be a little more tact and professional?!
Did Daring Do really not think this thing through?
Did she just pull a Daring Don’t?
… What? I need to make bad jokes so you can appreciate my good jokes.
You mean the ones that are far and few between?
I recall telling you to shut up!
Is this because you need help with your next book?" Rainbow Dash blurted out with a cocky smile on her face. "Because, and I don't mean to brag," yes, she did. "I have a few adventures of my own I think you can use.
And thus, why I hate Rainbow Dash… She wrote the first fanfiction in Equestria. And now every week, I’m stuck reviewing those fan fics that she started! Thanks a lot, Rainbow Dash!
And then…
"Rainbow Dash, I'm your mother!" She blurted out, immediately covering her mouth after saying it.
… Wow… that was… abrupt. I mean… wow… Really? Just… like that… Just like that… I know you want to get this story rolling, but… There wasn’t any hesitation in that. They barely get through pleasantries before she just blurts it out like that. I mean, I guess she’s nervous and wants to get it over with, but… that is how you are going to react to this situation.
Now, I understand why she chose to do it in a public place! Daring Do is a fucking idiot!
Did she really think that was her best move?! That rushing through it and not even giving her any prep or chance to recover or a chance to let it sink in before throwing this life changing event at her was the best course of action?!
Well, if she gets over life changing events like she does in Mare of Steel, she’ll be fine in about five minutes.
And so Rainbow Dash… just kind of accepts the whole thing about being related to Daring Do. Not even going to question it at all or anything? Somepony just comes up and says “Hey, I’m your mom” and you don’t even give it a second thought? I wonder what would happen if anypony did this?!
I’m your mother, Rainbow Dash!
But how?!
Because she slept with me!
I have two moms!
Actually, you have three.
What the fuuuuuuuuuuuuu-
Daring Do decides to reveal everything to Rainbow Dash and realizes that she may never earn forgiveness. And then, suddenly… And I do mean, really suddenly…
"It's okay," the daughter said simply, holding the older mare as tight as she could, feeling the warmth of her long lost mother's tears stream down the side of her sky blue coat.
That’s right. Rainbow Dash instantly forgives her mother.
This whole conflict that the story was building up was… that. Um… I’m a little disappointed here. Yeah, I know it’s supposed to be heartwarming, but I don’t feel that it was earned. To be honest, I feel kind of cheated here. Like we had something here and it’s just never explored upon. And to be honest, this whole ending feels rushed as hell.
Daring Do tells Rainbow Dash she’s her mother, Rainbow Dash forgives her, happily ever after. Seriously, that is how it goes? I’m not saying I dislike those kinds of moments, but … This is the mare who left you when you were a baby! You seriously have no anger, no sorrow, no doubt, nothing!
There is not a single psychological issue to having been … basically abandoned by the mare who gave birth to you?! Wow, I was joking when I said she gets over this like she does in Mare of Steel, but dear lord, it is as bad.
Mare of Steel showed her getting over the fact that she was an alien from outer space in the span of a few minutes.
Here, it’s like Daring Do accidently got her coffee instead of tea. A mild inconvenience at best.
The sad thing is, this is played up like this is going to change Rainbow Dash’s entire perspective on reality! That nothing is ever going to be the same! But… it never comes to that! It promises something and ultimately never delivers on it! Honestly, the father gave a much better reaction to this news than Rainbow Dash! The reaction the father gave, should have been the one Rainbow Dash gave! That would have been more interesting! Seeing how Do would win her daughter back and the measure she would take to prove her love and make it up to her! But no, it’s just glanced over.
So, Daring Do figures out that the greatest treasure was truly her daughter, who can get over things pretty casually. (Are we sure she wasn’t just extremely high during all this?) And they live happily ever after.
So, how does this story hold up?
Well, I hesitate to call it bad… But I hesitate to call it good.
Let’s start with what I liked. The writing is very solid. With very few grammar or spelling errors that I caught. The idea of the story is a sound one. I know a lot of ponies are opposed to Daring Do and Rainbow Dash being related. Honestly, I’m okay with that. I’m okay with it and this idea is a good example of why. They have similar personalities and Rainbow Dash could see Daring Do as sort of an idol. And maybe even a mother figure.
The moment with the father berating her is good, justified, but makes you feel sorry for our protagonist. However, it’s far too short and I feel it would have been better if Rainbow Dash was in the role of her father, having some kind of reaction. I don’t mean cut out the father entirely. I just mean give Rainbow Dash some kind of reaction to this very life-changing news.
Which I think is ultimately the biggest flaw with this story. The pacing.
While it starts off strong enough, it’s clear that this story feels rushed. Especially towards the end. It ends too quickly and doesn’t feel like the emotional build up paid off. I realize it was trying to be sweet, but there’s being sweet and then there’s almost ignoring the emotions one would go through. And while the story does try to explain why Dash might not be angry, but I don’t think they are strong ones at all.
Discord warping reality is nothing compared to a normal pony making you question everything you believe in and everything you know.
To me, that’s much more painful. And to me, that deserved a much larger reaction.
I don’t think that Rainbow Dash shouldn’t have forgiven Daring Do at the end of the story, I just think it came far too easily. Yes, it was about Daring Do figuring out about family, but wouldn’t the story have been that much stronger if Dash had been hurt? If Daring Do had been shown as wrong and she has to sacrifice everything just to try and win her back? Wouldn’t that have been more satisfying?
In order to connect with this situation, we have to connect to the characters. I’m sorry, I really tried to be touched by this, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t because I didn’t feel like Rainbow Dash was reacting realistically.
Now, many of you may call me heartless and a dick on this, but I really couldn’t see Dash reacting to this the way she did. It felt so forced and as such, it made the ending feel unsatisfying and rushed.
So, what kind of rating should I give it? I have to pick a side… Thumbs up… Or … thumbs down…
Sometimes I hate this part of the review... Picking a side...
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I’m sorry, guys. I tried to give this one a thumbs up, but I just don’t think it’s strong enough to carry itself.
The concept is good and the writing is well done, but the pacing and the rushed emotional parts on the characters hurt it for me.
I know a lot of you like this story and maybe you just see something that I don’t. But for me, it just wasn’t strong enough to tug at my heartstrings. Certainly not the worst I’ve ever read, but not something that I enjoyed.
Have a great day, guys. … I await your hate mail.
But at the very least… I have an easy week next week. After all, it is my first year anniversary. This next story should be no problem… Right?
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You're doing a Molestia story next week? Prepare your anus.... no seriously the chick doesn't go in nice and easy.
...Yes, I'm sure nothing bad will happen to, Mr the Critique. You'll even get Ice Cream and candy!
Dug the Simpsons reference, and it was interesting to see a review of something I had actually read. The only other one was the Trixie/Twilight story. This time, however, I agree with your conclusions. I remember the story being to quick and to forced, most likely because it was written overnight.
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You want to repeat that, motherfucker?
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This is actually quite interesting. If just for ll the awkwardness DaringRainbow becomes because of it.
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Go on...
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Hm, I think I'll take a look at this story myself. I've actually never heard of Daring and Dash being related before, so this be intriguing.
Oh, and about that stinger...
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Well, this looks promising. Let's see how badly the idea is screwed up, shall we?
Oi, yer doin' it wrong. You'z can nevuh haf enuff dakka! Enuff dakka is more'n ya got, an' dere ain't no such fing as "Enuff Dakka"!
Story of my life when writing Avatar fanfics, that is.
It's kind of like Indiana Jones and Belloq. And as you said, there's a lot more that can be drawn from here, we just need to see it.
Get on it, Hasbro. We need a full Daring Do series.
Although Daring Do first debuted in "Read It and Weep", I'm guessing there's significance behind this.
In some stories it works. Others, not so much.
I find this a bit awkward, because I'm used to clearer indication of what is thought and what isn't. It's a stylistic choice, mainly, but it's a bit jarring, all things considered.
So much alliteration... now let's see if you can do a review in verse.
When did this become Misery? Is this just some reference to try and be clever? BECAUSE IT DOESN'T FIT!
Well, that was fast. Wouldn't something like this take a little more time to fully get over?
I'm sure there are other writers that have done this whole plot right... I just need to think of a few.
This is canon, people.
And I thought I made Princess Celestia too blunt when Rainbow learned she was Kryptonian.
Speak of the devil!
Well, that's totally realistic!
I tried my best... and then proceeded to make the same mistake in Kyoshi Rising
And happy anniversary! And you're going for a Molestia story?
May God have mercy on your soul.
"And yet this still went better than when I tried to buy a gun legally!"
I think you got those two mixed up, partner.
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Feelin's mutual, Critique!
Bad Rainbow Dash! We don't talk to friends like that!
Really? Mare of Steel seems to be universally liked.
Anyways, good review!
2849990
Doesn't mean it's exempt from having problems.
2850060 Fair enough.
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Other than that, great review!
2848986
Ooo! I love Ice Cream and Candy!
2849064
I'll be honest... I don't like Sunset Shimmer. I just didn't think she was that great a character/antagonist. I've heard she's better in the comics and in the Rainbow Rocks movie, but I've only seen her in Equestria Girls and I didn't think she was that good of a villain.
Yeah... the enthusiasm just emanates from my body doesn't it? Can't you tell how excited I am to review this one? This is me being excited...
2849990
No, I gave Mare of Steel a good review. I did enjoy it. But there were certain things that did bother me.
2849089
I spent so much time trying to get as much alliteration as possible in this. The Daring Do thing makes it easy. One day I want to do a review in nothing but rhyme. But that probably won't be for a while. I lack the skill I think.
Thanks. I'll need all the mercy I can get.
2850577 26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lq25jd8Z8s1qasi0co1_500.gif
Glad you enjoyed the review.
2850870 Oh, she's awful in Equestria Girls, easily the weakest villain in the series. Rainbow Rocks fixed her as a character, making her genuinely likable. It made me love her and made her new best waifu. You really need to watch it.
Oh, and I certainly hope Molestia somehow figures into the overarching plot. I look forward to it.
Was this a purposeful yugioh reference or was that actually one of the books? I don't really know what most of her books actually are.
2850898 What the Hell is going on in your picture?! I thought NSFW pictures of any sort got banned... unless you're Knighty, in which case you're allowed to post porn everywhere.
2850882 Yeah, Iowa and I already cleared it up. I loved the review!
2850577 Well, you aren't that powerful.
2850896 No! Don't surrender! La revolution must live on!
2851318 Glass houses, bitch.
2851380
The clop indications I understand, but how does anyone get in the mood when Celestia has THAT FACE?!?!?
2851386 Celestia is like Angelina Jolie. She can do as much crazy shit as she wants and she'll still be hot.
Oh, and if you look closely, there's a Luna beneath her.
2851398
2850924 I don't think it was a Yugioh reference. I just think it is something the author put it. To be honest, I made a closer connection to Final Fantasy, but I do see where Yugioh would come in.
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2850896 As a villain Sunset Shimmer fails.... As a character? Yeah pretty damned good, at least to me. Works as a far better protagonist than antagonist honestly, to me. I mean I'm always a sucker for villains trying to make a legitimate turn for the good side(Provided it fits their character, namely... Villains who aren't unashamedly evil essentially). Which is why I liked the Thunderbolts
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At least up until Marvel turned them into a makeshift version of the Suicide Squad.
Also the reason I don't mind seeing Captain Cold on the Justice League in the New 52, since barely any of Flash's Rogues are what you can consider evil.... Thieves and criminals yes, but not evil.
Flash Sentry.... I don't HATE him.... I don't like him either.... We only see his human self, and as it's been shown there can be QUITE a bit of difference between human and pony versions...... His pony self doesn't HAVE a character.
2851404 Well whatever it is, at least the story wasn't full of little references. That bugs the crap out of me. Like I get people like stuff, but why can't they write a fanfic about that thing they continuously reference and not ponies or Marvel or what have you?
2851957 I agree. Too many references kills the story.
2851415 Hi, sexy.
2865561
