the best advice ever given. · 3:03am Jan 6th, 2015
HOW TO DEAL WITH SLEEP PARALYSIS
One: If you wake up in the middle of the night and feel hungry, do not try to go back to sleep.
Remember the quote from Charlotte's Web: Being tired and hungry don't mix well.
Two:Go eat something sweet and drain it down with some milk. This always works for me.
Three: Watch something funny. Turn on the lights, play a game.
Don't sit there laying awake motionless, the possibilities of something being in the room to kill you are slim if the damn thing's only prey is up and moving. It's a proven fact that aliens/demons/ghosts envy sentient beings like humans. (Not really...)
Four: Don't go to bed earlier than 8:30 right after eating dinner.
Doing this and you'll only set yourself up for failure.
Word of advice: I have been dealing with sleep paralysis for years, and I've learned to stop and control the hallucinations with some intense mental training. Tell yourself, "I am dreaming, I can take control of this." The calmer you are, the easier it works. Yes, our brains work like season finales to My Little Pony, why do you think us bronies like that fucking shit? Fucking horses are saving you from heart attacks and you don't even know. I once hallucinated that a monster was chasing me, and I was so scared shitless that the best I could do was turn the monster into floating chairs and teddy bears. Yeah, imagination is so powerful. But keep in mind, you will automatically think of the best thing to do in this situation, (which is panic, but good luck with that since you're fucking paralyzed) so most likely, you'll do what I do and force your brain to magically beat off the influence of DMT in your brain. If I can defeat the effects of a drug as powerful as DMT with some shounen-anime-esque fucking pep talk to my brain of the century, then I must be fucking awesome!
SLEEP PARALYSIS: IT'S THOSE LIFE-LEMONS THAT PEOPLE KEEP TALKING ABOUT.
God that happened to me once it was truly one of the most terrifying experience in my life.
You can't tell me what to do, Fem-Discord.
It's not like you own me.
Something to tag on rule 3. Look for a shimmer, that's how you know predator is there, so keep a flashlight handy.
Wow, chaos is magic, I referenced the end of this blog without reading it previously.