Present Perfect vs. Somewhere Only We Know (1000th review of 2014!) · 3:31pm Dec 7th, 2014
Yeah, I should be writing, but the audiobooks are piling up and I wanted to get this done. Here we go, my thousandth review of the year! I knew I could do it! And for the occasion, I picked a classic sadfic that I've been meaning to vs. post on for a while: Patchwork Poltergeist's Somewhere Only We Know. Be sure you've read it before checking below the break: here be spoilers!
(And here be a reading by Ender. And another by Voiceguy.)
The greatest thing about this story is its core idea: that Equestria and everything that goes on in MLP:FiM are really the wistful dreams of an aging, slightly battered pony in the real world. (I've always placed the "real" setting in 19th century London, but really there's no way to say for certain, though it sure doesn't feel modern.) That pony is, of course, Rainbow Dash, which makes her plight all the more tragic. All her friends have been sold off and she's the only pony left in her stable. All she wants to do is have a good run, but her knee is busted and she's not as spry as she once was.
There's something really magical about animal POV, something about the mixture of nobility and naivety that is pretty much cruise control for sad. Stories about dogs are usually the best at this (see also every fic written from Winona's perspective). Add to that the wishful escapism that Dash goes through and it's easy to see why I had tears in my eyes at the end. Even though the ponies in this story seem to have a good bit more self-awareness than animal perspective characters tend to, knowing what she wants, what she lives through, and what she can never have is heartbreaking.
There's an undercurrent of pro-animal sympathies in this story as well, along the lines of "don't mistreat horses just to make yourself look nice". Not only is Dash without Pinkie, Twilight, Applejack or Rarity (Fluttershy oddly never comes into the picture), but when she meets them again, their appearances tell stories about how they've been treated. No single line is sadder than "Oh, Applejack."
hang on, im cri ;_;
All right, so it's sad, it's heartbreaking, it's really imaginative. Is it perfect? Not quite. Most of its more flawed aspects are indicative of its age (story number 65!) The paragraph spacing is haphazard at best, though since the paragraphs are also indented, it doesn't make for a difficult read. I also caught a single typo. The biggest issue is characterization. Rainbow Dash is hard to write convincingly melancholic, and the first few paragraphs sound more like writerly narrative than true first person. She does sound more like herself when expounding her own accomplishments, at least. Strangely, Rainbow's best characterization is when she's a pony. If she were a real horse, this is how she would act: quick to kick, daring, loving to run, untamable even in old age.
In all, it's easy to see why this is a beloved classic (and I guess I really have grown to like sadfics more over the years). At its heart, it's an exploration of the reasons we escape into utopic worlds. Despite starring a simple pony, this is a story about all of us.
4/5
A more creative and depressing story you will never find.
Good choice for #1000. Also, I note that he has the same initials as you. Coincidence, or conspiracy?
I prefer the RBP version. It has zombies.
2638575 Conspiradence!
But yeah, this is one of my favourite fics on this site. First I read by a competent and creative writer at the time. I think.
An excellent choice for a review. Also, a damned good story. I read that way back before I was a member, when I was trying to determine whether pony fanfiction was a worthwhile pursuit.
2638575 Illuminati confirmed.
Yeah, I've only seen the RDP version of this. It's nice to see a review of the actual story.
I'm mildly surprised you hadn't already reviewed this; I somehow thought you'd have been bound to. I'm with the consensus that this is one of the best of the really old stories on Fimfiction. (I gave it 8.5/10.) I can't really argue with anything you say here, which does make things a little dull. :P But one thing I will pick up on:
Given the numerous similarities to Black Beauty, I'd say that was probably what Patchwork Poltergeist had in mind. Not just the general "pro-animal sympathies" either, but specifics: Rarity's endurance of the bearing rein and the broken-down Applejack are both very similar to strong themes in Anna Sewell's book. Mistreating horses just so they'd look nice is pretty much what Sewell was protesting about. Actually, the "Oh, Applejack" scene is surely a conscious homage to a scene from Black Beauty involving a horse named Ginger; even her colouring is similar.
This was a great story.
I never quite got the overwhelming feelings of sad back when I read this story years ago. No, I was too busy being creeped out by the idea that it was a real world horse imagining all of FiM. I still thought it was a great story, but I got something else out of it, I guess.
First off,
Congratulations!!
Secondly, looks like I have another story to add to my library.
This story is one of my all-time favorites. I agree on the characterization bit, though I can see even that as being some kind of wishful thinking: that she isn't like that and imagines that she is.
I also like the way it can be interpreted as a story of just Dash or of all of them. Is MLP just Dash's fantasy world where she's assigned those identities to the other horses she knows? Is there some collective dream world where they all interact?
This story didn't hit me as sad at first, but about three days after I read it, it did. It doesn't so much draw conclusions or teach you something about the characters, but it's a wonderful mood piece. I agree on the time frame, but based on the language used, I always envisioned it taking place somewhere in the American northeast.
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Rain...Bow Poop? O.o
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Oh. OHHH. Okay.
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Well, I had read it previously, but that was long ago, before I did reviewing. Also, that link doesn't surprise me, as I'm led to believe another of Patchwork's stories is based on The Last Unicorn.
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I, too, always wondered if it wasn't a collective dream (which would only make it sadder ;_;)
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Link, please? I have no idea what RBP or RDP is. But the zambie fan in me wants me to see what it is.
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OMG WTF BBQ I remember watching this a long time ago. I completely forgot about it. I remember reading SOWK during the summer recently, but couldn't shake the feeling I had already read the story. Like, déjà vu. Rainbow Dash Presents is apparently the reason why.
Damn, RDP was fucking dumb. Fuckin loved it XD. You get a sense of apathy or ok-ness or hilariously "whatever, sure," for RDP, rather than the full on sad-emos from the actual story.
Damn, RDP makes such a great amusing farce of anything it's touched.
Also, the acronym for Somewhere Only We Know sounds kinda like "sock". Yeah, I can't take this story seriously any more
Makes me feel kinda bad or maybe even sad 
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*She
If one reads Black Beauty, one realizes that AppleJack is on the verge of being worked to death. AppleJack is Ginger.
Black Beauty
How can you say all that, then give it 4/5?
2638925 RDP fell down on that one. Usually they take a sad story & make it silly, but here they just took a sad story & told it worse.
2640553 Yeah, not their best. I preferred Cupcakes in their earlier ones, but my all time favorite was Rainbow Factory.
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I really like it, and it's got some flaws: that's a solid 4. :B
Woo. 5000th review on the big master list.
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Hey. Hey. Uncle Bad. Uncle Bad. I got me a bunch of heavy crap I need to get across the border. Like, could you please lend me a hoof?
I know you gimped your leg down some stairs awhile ago (hope that's healed, bee tee dubs. Looks sure healed) and you might be getting kinda old, but your back is damn strong. I could use a strong back like yours.
Y'know, they oughta call it the "Charity of Horses" or something. Like, some spend their whole lives hauling crap around, day in and day out. And they never say a word, never complaining. That's a charitable sacrifice, eh? Well, it ain't like they can say a word about it. Well, I guess you could, since you can talk. Then again, you're not completely a horse, but some sort daemon/horse/furry/car/evil thing, so I dunno. I guess it does kinda apply because that's still part horse. It's kinda like how I'm a catboi/large moth/flesh-shifting cyborg/sorcerer thing, but I can speak on behalf of moths, because I'm part moth, but I'm a pretty big moth, so I dunno if I can speak for all the little ones since they're so little and all.
*opens up an orange, neatly tossing the peel into a nearby waste bin, and offers half to Bad Horse before eating the rest*
Anyways, yeah, I wonder if horses could talk that they would complain a lot and demand equal rights and stuff and maybe even start a horse revolution... a horse-olution.
I think I need to work on that.
*spits out orange seeds on the ground and kicks dirt on top of them*
But yeah, they can't really talk so I guess that's why they don't get all uppity. Or maybe if they could they'd be all stoic and not really give a damn, continuing their thankless break-back tasks. So... who are you to speak on behalf of horses? Who am I to speak on behalf of moths? We're both part human (maybe). Who knows? Maybe horses' and moths' views are varying on matters, like humans. Maybe a few welcome being worn into the ground, so as to have a purpose in life. Maybe a lot detest it extremely and want to play outside and all those lively things. Maybe some would seek enlightenment. Y'know, if horses were smart enough to think of stuff like religion and knowledge. Maybe the horses' view is actually all the same and they're all like robot drones, programmed with only one view. I guess it's highly likely they'll do all that crap just to get a carrot. They're, like, conditioned to do so. Working hard equals food and shelter.
I dunno. I guess it's still pretty fun to take a guess at what they would think. We'd prolly piss off a lot of horses and moths if they cared about such things, though.
Hmm? What's in the crates? Fuck if I know. I don't ask those kinda questions. Privacy and shit. I dunno. Maybe explosives. Maybe rock candy. Maybe ancient Neighican texts of dark arts. But yeah, you in? There's a lot and I really could use your help.
Yeah, of course I'll split the money. I just really could use your help, eh, Bad?
Hazard pay? What's that?
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Imma go over to PP's an' steal all his Sharpies an' replace 'em wif dry erase markers :B
...Also, does :B =
cdn.bulbagarden.net/upload/thumb/f/f5/399Bidoof.png/250px-399Bidoof.png
?
Cuz damn, you spam that emote a lot, PP. It's as if you're trying to reference the prolificness of Bidoof :$
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Bidoof is always relevant. :B It can be Bidoof if you want it to be.
It's a good thing I didn't do fic reviews when I read this. Everyone loves this story and I simply don't get why.