Moving Forward, more WRTMI stuffs · 11:55am Nov 15th, 2014
Hey there, folks. Here's the weekly update.
Went to lunch with Mom yesterday. Last time we did lunch, we never spoke for a very long time. It was different this time.
We ended up speaking at length for awhile about all of it, from the anxiety shit to my boyfriend and my plans for visiting Europe She's never going to be able to fully accept it, because she's a very spiritual person who 'wants me in Heaven', and is asking me to turn to God. I can't blame her. Not only does my life clash with the beliefs of the whole family, but no parent wants their child to turn out this way. I understand it's one thing to accept a gay coworker, it's something else entirely to come to terms with your own son not granting you a grandchild (she's got 4, though, so I'm in no damn rush, whatever my orientation!), or even to to reach Heaven if you believe in it. I told her, patiently, that I've nearly lost my faith because I've never felt like I was ever heard... I've never felt like any prayer was ever answered. No calm or peace ever came over me. I have never had a connection with God, something both parents and my siblings have described having. Besides, I don't believe there's room in Heaven for someone like me. It just doesn't make sense to continue to follow scripture that labels me an abomination. So, for the time being, Mom and I are back on our old terms and she's happy that I'm at least happy (she doesn't know about my present situation aside from anxiety, and she won't know), but I know she'll continue to pray that I'll 'find myself a woman and maybe start a family'. She still loves me and she wants the best, so I can't blame her for not embracing the changes I've made wholeheartedly.
Anyways, I've got a referral for a psychologist. I've just got to fill it out and be extra careful not to claim that I'm at risk of suicide, because that's a lovely removal from home or work against my will and a useless 3 day stay at a mental institution. I'm not at an immediate risk of offing myself right now, but I daresay I could use a long talk with a psychologist. So, that's slowly being taken care of.
In WRTMI news, I've got most of the next few chapters laid out and I'm ready to dive into writing with 38. I wanted to have two chapters left of act 2, but it's not really possible without another beastly chapter like 35. I'm not worried, and I've even got a strategy worked out for the other character perspectives and keeping readers in the loop with what's happening on the side plots. The story will, of course, remain firmly wedged behind Rainbow's 3rd person perspective, but Luna's clash with Gwyndolin and what the rest of the Mane Six, Wonderbolts, and the Crusaders are up to will still be detailed.
We'll get back to Scootalove soon, folks, but shit be goin' down.
Also, here's the remaining chapter titles if you're into spoilers!
Chapter 38 - Check
Chapter 39 - The Hour of Twilit Void
Chapter 40 - The Gate
And random picture.
HHHNNNNGGGG
Peace out, mangs.
Kool that picture is intresting.... Well good luck and its good to see you have it planned out Have fun with a psychologist and hope your problems work out see ya
2596307 Thanks, I'll try to have fun.
Well, I'm very glad you and your mother are talking, at least.
I'll also be the first one to vouch for talking with a psychologist as quite often relaxing and freeing.
Best wishes, my friend!
I'm really glad to hear you're gonna be meeting with a dude/dudette that really knows what he/she's talking about. I can say that speaking with a counselor has done a lot of good for me, and I think speaking with a psychologist about things will be a great thing for you, too.
Also really glad to hear you and your mom are solid about things. And 4 grandchildren? Yeah, she's gonna be fine. I wouldn't worry, either.
And it's awesome that your writing is coming together, too. I think I'm going to give WRTMI a read this upcoming December, when I actually have time to do... anything other than work. I'm looking forward to it.
Take care, and stay strong, man!
~Arwhale
2596416 Thanks, I'll keep everyone updated.
2596502 Thanks! Definitely give WRTMI a read. Bear in mind that the prose in the early goings is a bit dated, hence my desire for a rewrite sometime. I am hoping a psychologist will help me figure it all out.