That’s German for… what, “we broke the living-room?” · 2:36am Nov 14th, 2014
Hasbro contemplates Anschluss of DreamWorks Studios.
I wonder how that’s being received down in the Art Department...
As you wander through the studios of DreamWorks
There’s a song will greet your ear
It’s a song that we’ve been singing here at DreamWorks
For what seems like half a year...
Every male employee dances to the strain
Of the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”
All—without exception—join in the refrain
Of the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”
We all think that Hasbro is a capitalist tool!
(Sing the “I-Am-Not-a-Brony Polka!”)
We thought “Equestria” was just a fancy riding school!
(Sing the “I-Am-Not-a-Brony Polka!”)
A DreamWorks man is cultured
With multiple degrees
Post-modernism’s what he most enjoys!
He hates ‘accessibility’
And bourgeois values too—
And he never, ever plays with children’s toys!
I never shipped TwiLuna
Or clopped a single colt!
(Sing the “I-Am-Not-a-Brony Polka!”)
Were you not at BronyCon?
I was not at Bronycon!
(“I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”)
Is that not a Twilight plush?
That is not a Twilight plush!
(“I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”)
Don’t you hate those vampire chicks?
I don’t—why, some of my best friends!..
(“I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”)
Don’t you just love Nightmare Moon?--
I don’t—Nightmare who?
“Nightmare--who?”
“Yeah, Nightmare who?”
“Bro, you’re yanking my reins.”
“What’s that mean, ‘yanking my reins?’
“Are you jerking my chain or something?
“Nah, I’m not jerking your chain—Nightmare who?”
“Nightmare Moon!”
“Should I know her? Is she an animator?”
“You don’t remember?”
“Nah, I don’t remember her. Who was she?”
“Well…”
An alicorn
Very mean
Very tall and dark (“mn-unh…”)
Cat-slit eyes
Had fangs for teeth
Lunar cutie-mark (“No, I never heard…”)
She had a sis--
Celestia--
Rainbow tail and mane (“Oh! Yeah, yeah...”)
On the Moon
A thousand years
‘Til her moment came (“Of course!--”)
She’s the one,
Solstice Day,
Left us all aghast ("Yeah!")
When she said
That the night
Would forever last! ("That's her!")
She’s the one
Said the dark
Was a flag unfurled!
And that it
Soon would fly
Over all the world!
The world!
The world!
And all that stood between her and victory was six meddling foals MUAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA…
“…I never heard of her.”
“Neither did I.”
To sound aesthetic values, let us raise a toast
(Sing the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”)
Sure there are some Bronies—two or three at most
(Sing the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”)
We throw out happy endings
Right from the very start:
Our world-view is resolutely tragic!
And like J. Luis Borges
We solemnly believe
In the strict surrealistic use of magic
(”--of magic! --of magic! --magic! Magic makes it all compleeeete….”)
DreamWorks’ brand is cooler
Than snow in Donner Pass!
(Sing the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”)
Our core demographic
Skews strictly upper-class!
(Sing the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!--)
Wait a minute, wait a minute--you there, the new hire...
You are not singing.
You do not like to sing?
Tell me—you still have a student loan to pay off, nicht wahr? Sing...
Sing the “I-am-not-a-Brony Polka!”—HOOFBUMP!
This is the greatest thing ever. The only thing better I can think of is a couple of "reformed" changlings singing the I-didn't-invade-Canterlot Polka.
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Hm...
As you travel through the Palace of Celestia
A melody will greet your ears:
It's been around the Palace of Celestia
For a good two or three years...
Every mare and stallion is dancing to the strain
Of the "I-am-not-a-Changeling Polka"
All--without exception--join in the refrain
Of the "I-am-not-a-Changeling Polka"...
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Speaking of which, I saw a marvelous line in a story earlier today, after Cadance tried a little something new with her traditional dance of greeting with Twilight.
It totally needs to go in the show.
2593765 Chrysal-who?
Oh, Ed. Never change.
This needs a PMV with Pinkie Pie's one-pony oompah-band from Swarm Of The Century.
Hm. Dreamworks-animated My Little Pony movie.
Hmmmmm.