OH MY GOD · 3:12pm Nov 11th, 2014
I'm so fucking done!! I'm posting this in a blog on this site because in case someone who wants to know of my current whereabouts and status, they might stumble across this post and get their answers.
I am rebronified. I like FIMfiction and read pony stuff. But I just can't find the will to write. I'm facing a severe inspirational drought, and that doesn't mean I don't have aspirations or even artistic ideas, it just means that nothing I do anymore feels competent. I've read and reread my stories and they just feel so juvenile and bland and cliche that I can't think of what to do with them.
That, and my life right now- sucks. At least I think it does. I don't know, compared to the people reading this blog I'm sure my life is just fine right now but still, this year I've discovered several different definitions of the word pain. I went through a week of nothing but suicidal thoughts, injured myself several ways, and watched my mom fall into emotional and mental disarray. I hear laughter in my head constantly, especially when someone is crying, and I feel trapped and free at the same time.
I don't want help, I want OUT!
Anyway yeah that's.... that's my status post.
oh and um Hi, InkTapper here. forgot that bit.
Hey, you can come with me to the mental help place. We can be crazy together.
2588152 That sounds like a lot of fun, but weed is enough to help me right now tbh X9
Holy shit, man, that's a big pile of unnecessary baggage to deal with. Writing, as you probably know, is always a good way to escape from the troubles of life but you must understand that in times of emotional pain, your creativity will be drastically reduced. Don't expect too much from yourself. Eat a lot of fruit and drink plenty of water, rejuvenate those oestrogens and nutrients.
I honestly had no idea how bad your life is dude. I usually got small things from Nick about how you are doing, but for a long time I haven't. I hope all the things in your life can be worked out. And just between us (and everyone else who reads this comment) my life is doing so hot either. Though I don't want to tell you why, I can say that is been hard for me so join the club. Hope everything works out for you man.
2588797 dude, you can pm me if you want to talk about that shit man. like you said, we're on the same boat.
2588770 Thank you for your advice.
I'll be sure to do that
2588936
Nah don't worry about it man. It's really personal and talking about it doesn't make me feel any better. But yes, we are on the same boat. Hopefully, we're setting sail for happiness.
Ok, I have to do the Mum thing.
STOP the weed!
If you are a bit predisposed to mental health issues, it can make them 100 times worse.
Please talk to a councillor, you are very precious, and self harm will only remind you in the future, that you had a bad time - a constant reminder that you were in a dark place. No scars means you think of happier things.
PM me if you need to talk further privately.
Regards Annie
Whyyyy, blargles. I've just been doing my best to feel well myself.... which has mostly involved cartoons (Gravity Falls and Over the Garden Wall and Korra S4, mostly--as well as several other smaller ones--and Doctor Who of course, but the season ended on that, so, there's the Christmas special to look forward to on that).
School is fusuckishkickle, but still good. I suddenly have the fire suddenly ignighted after 6+ years to want to really buckle down and learn Esperanto, but only AFTER I have decided to learn Spanish, which I bought the fucking $200+ book for for class, cuz fucking school! And I am currently enrolled in Spanish anyway, and have class for that tomorrow... eh. That minor though, eh?
I guess I just have issues mostly right now with my concentration. Like, the past few days have been nothing but even worse storms in my head. I can hardly write, read, or enjoy video games for any decent amount of time. Eh.
Am I venting? Yeah.....
But hey, from impulsivity should come creativity, eh? However round-about. Anyyyyyyyywho! I miss ya my friend.
I know you're going through shit right now, and shit happens in life, but that doesn't me life has to be shit. Kick shit's ass with soap!!!!
Also, I've been through some shit since the last we talked, I believe..... Like I had a crazy, legit crazy, gf for a bit.. I didn't know until the end, but that messed me up right bad... but I've gotten over it with not letting the shit be my life, because my life, myself, I may feel like shit sometimes, especially when I am covered in it, but I am not shit. And if I could be any near as not shit as you, I would be happy :P Cuz you, you bro, you is one passionate dude! Like everytime I hear from you, everything is full of your.... essence--is that the word? I dunno. It just comes through with original power, as though from your very soul, everything you say. That honesty!
Save me from this part of my ADHD acting up more than usual--what is this!.... I am jk, but seriously, though, this bit going on with me is quite odd
2594174 Seriously, you sir have been my greatest internet friend I've ever made. (You and Cloudy)
We should keep talking!
2594675
You still have my number, bro