Alexmagnet Explains: Xhosaland Mass Cattle Killing of 1856-57 · 6:04pm Aug 25th, 2014
Boy, it’s been awhile since I did one of these, huh? Well, I’m back… sort of. I’m going to try to get back to doing these on a fairly regular basis, but it’ll probably be more like every two weeks, instead of every week. Turns out that was really hard to keep up. Anywho, don’t really have much to say in the pre-blog thing, so let’s just move on.
This has nothing to do with anything, and yet everything to do with everything.
Today we’re going to talk about a tiny little country you’ve probably never heard of and some people who you’d think were made up, but all this really happened, and all of it was as crazy as it’s going to sound. See, back in the 19th and 20th century, everyone and their rich grandmother wanted a piece of Africa. Actually, even before that people have always been fighting over “The Dark Continent”. Some do it for land, others for power, and a hell of a lot of them did it for slaves. But this story is really only tangentially about that. This story is about a small group of people in the eastern part of the country now known as South Africa, in a country called Xhosaland. Between the years of 1856 and 1866, the population of Xhosaland plummeted by nearly 80%, and why is a tale of astounding superstitious belief and a willingness to want to believe… just like Mulder.
The year is 1856, and the month is April (I have no idea what day it was, so let’s say Tuesday), two young Xhosa girls are sent to the River Gxara to scare away birds from the cornfields. Upon approaching the water’s edge, the older of the two girls, Nongqawuse, experiences a vision. She sees two tall figures materialized beside them, and the figures speak to her. Obviously, at this point, Nongqawuse is flipping her shit, but she dutifully listens to the message. The figures explain to her that a great resurrection is coming, and that there will be no more need for cattle, or corn, or anything else they might cultivate, because all that will be taken care of once the resurrection begins.
So, having been given this message, Nongqawuse is ordered to return to her kraal and alert the chief to this coming resurrection. Wary, but loyal to her people, Nongqawuse and her friend hurry back to their village. She finds the chief and explains to him that they need to start slaughtering all their cattle, and take all the harvested grain and burn it. In addition, she told him that they could sow no new crops, nor raise new cattle. Also, witchcraft and its related practices must be ended forever. In this glorious new world all wants and needs would be taken care of, so no work was to be done except to prepare for the coming resurrection.
This is a kraal, in case you were wondering.
Now, this message seemed absolutely insane, which it was, and the chief, Sarili, laughed them out of his hut. However, there was one particular portion of the figures’ message that seemed appealing, and would wind up being the Xhosa’s undoing. In this great resurrection, all the English and the “whites” would be swept into the ocean, ridding the Xhosa of their influence. With this in mind, the girls returned to the river the next day and received the same message from the same figures. This time, however, they added that Nongqawuse and her friend should seek out Nongqawuse’s uncle, Mhalakaza, who was more or less a witchdoctor/seer.
Now, an important thing to note about Mhalakaza is that he was briefly converted to Christianity when he befriended the English Archdeacon of Grahamstown, Nathaniel James Merriman. Merriman was something of an oddball, eccentric and unconventional, and when he took Mhalakaza under his wing, the latter took on the European name, Wilhelm Goliat. He built a hut in the back of Merriman’s garden, and lived there for some time. Mhalakaza dreamed big though, and it was his life goal to become a gospel man. When he told Merriman’s wife of his visions, she laughed so hard she busted her corset. This pissed him off and eventually caused him to abandon Christianity and return to his kraal, taking back the name Mhalakaza.
Pictured are Nongqawuse on the right, and Nonkosi on the left.
I missed your history posts, glad to see you're back. Also good Trixie.
Jesus Christ.
I linked someone to this.
I laughed at Not Pictured: Russians.
This was a great story, and I hadn't heard it before. Well done.
Dammit, I lost my shirt again. Darn thing just likes to slide right off.
I love reading these. Also, damn.
That is... I have no words.
That's. ..pretty fucked up
That was a decidedly depressing piece of history.
I also noticed that this one, like your Crusades blogs, was about a bunch of people dying for religious reasons. What, have you got something against religion?
Or is religion just really entertaining history to write about? 
Really intriguing how the prophecy becomes real at the end... nice job if you wrote it. Also, where did you hear it?
... By the way it was really hard to read because i was constantly trying to figure out what that Trixie drawing is (it's... a Trixie-Lugia-somedigimon mix?)
2400441
Um, I think you may have misunderstood something here. This isn't a fictional story... This really happened. All the stories on the blog that's linked at the end are historical events. Also, that picture Trixie as Satsuki from Kill la Kill.
2400543
...mmmh yes, I see now that what I wrote was a bit confusing...
I know it's not fictional, what I wanted to say is that your narration of the story was good, and then I asked where did you hear that story from, unless you where there or something :l
...yeah, I express my thoughts very badly
2400587
Ah, I see. No, I just misunderstood what you wrote. But yes, I told the story in my own words, though I read about in and used as a reference a book called Historical Blunders. That book and a few others are where I've heard many of the stories I'm relating in these blogs.
Oh my god.
Jesus Alex...
Yep. 'Bout what I expected from the title.
So does that mean next you'll cover some good old American blunders like early Jamestown?
Where did you get the first picture?