Spoiler Alert: Son of Batman, Part 1

: Saw Son of Batman the other day.

: The movie begins at the base 'a Ra's Al Ghul, Batman's ecoterrorist villain, which he shares with an army 'a ninjas, 'is daughter, Talia, an' 'is grandson, Damian. Ah haffta say, Damian has a remarkably soft an' polite voice; ah honestly expected somethin' a little whinier or angrier.
They're then attacked by a mercenary army led by Deathstroke, who's apparently Ra's' disgraced former second-in-command. Gee, where have ah seen THAT before?

: ….um, we might haffta split town aftah this review.
: Anyway, even though this battle gives Talia one of her rare opportunities to kick some flank, Ra's' forces begin to be overwhelmed. This is largely because he seems uncharacteristically unwilling to use modern technology, and Deathstroke seems uncharacteristically willing to work with dozens of rank-and-file mercenaries, even though he usually can't stand working with inferior fighters. He manages to blow Ra's up with a fireball and drop him a couple stories, which is apparently so damaging that the Lazarus Pit can't save Ra's. It saved Jason Todd after he was beaten with a crow bar, blown up, buried, dug himself out of the ground, and endured several weeks of near-starvation, but apparently it can't save Ra's.
Damian and Deathstroke then fight, and Damian manages to cut Deathstroke's eye out, causing Deathstroke to flee while swearing vengeance. I think I know now why they picked Deathstroke for this; he's one of the very few villains who would actually bother starting a blood rivalry with a 10 year old.
: We then cut to Batman, who seems to be the only cast member who got the memo that all costumes post-"Justice League: War" were supposed to be inspired by the New 52. He finds that hooligan Killer Croc, who has apparently had a tail grafted to his overall reptilian appearance. Batman tries to stop Croc from absconding with some mutagens, before Talia arrives to save Bruce's tuccus. She then reveals that Damian is Bruce's son, conceived in an incident where she drugged Bruce in order to get him to, how shall I say, engage in the amorous congress. I must say, the revelation that Batman was date-raped was given a lot more impact and horror in the comic. I really hope they aren't INTENTIONALLY trying to enforce the double-standard on this issue. Talia then leaves Damian with Bruce for safe-keeping.
: We then cut to Dr. Kirk Langstrom, a geneticist who's known in the comics for being the original Man-Bat. He has a wife and a vegan, punk rock loving daughter. Langstrom seems to have a history of being forced to upgrade super villains, like Killer Croc, and creating bioengineered warriors for terrorists, like Ra's Al Ghul. Since Ra's is dead, Deathstroke arrives to kidnap Langstrom's family and force him to make an army of Man-Bats for him. Deathstroke is wearing a hooded poncho to cover up his face, which seems odd since the audience already knows who he is and who cut out his eye.
: Damian spends the next day or so belittling Bruce's achievements and damaging his property in order to continue his training. Um, n-not that there's anything wrong with that. Though there IS something wrong with how Damian wants to hunt down Deathstroke and…and k-kill him. Batman tells him to stay at home while he goes to Arkham Asylum to interrogate Killer Croc. Interestingly enough, they've recycled the Asylum design from the "The Batman" cartoon. And then….
AIIIIEEEEE!!!