Jun
25th
2014
Celestia pin-up · 4:57am Jun 25th, 2014
Okay, okay. I know what you've been thinking. "Bad Horse, if you're so bad, and if nopony is beyond the reach of your hooves, why can't you get the one thing every pony wants? The one thing every pony, young and old, male and female, needs. Bad Horse, why can't you give us Celestia nudie pics?"
Well, quit your grumbling. I got what you want right here. Ponies died to get this picture. Well, one pony died. Princess Celestia has a no-exceptions policy against anypony receiving nude pictures of her without a personal autographing session. The death certificate said he died of happiness.
You've been warned.
So here she is, folks: Our princess, in the raw:
What you do with this picture, I don't wanna know.
It's so weird seeing her without her regalia.
Dang, she needs to get a hoofichure, STAT!
Meh. Still number two princess.
Hooves of the Void, a yawning evil that cannot be shown to her subjects.
I can't write Twilestia because I always imagine Twilight overreacting to the sight of Princess Celestia without her golden shoes on.
Well, she's not totally naked. She's wearing hoofpolish.
Waaait a minute! I see pixels! This naughty picture is clearly shopped!
2232407 2232354 2232360 It's a little court secret. Nothing to be ashamed of, really. Most white horses have black hooves. But when you're the incarnation of purity and perfection, well, it can be awkward. Poor Celly.
2232355 Luna's okay... if all you want is hugs.
2232418
Obviously the photo quality was bad.
Journalism nowadays, huh?
Don't you wish your marefriend was HAWT like me, don't cha?
2232346 I know. It's just this sort of uncanny feeling, like when you see what you look like to everyone else instead of what you look like in a mirror.
2232355
I agree 100% with this...
I am going to follow - oh, I already am.
I knew exactly what was going to be below the moment I read "Celestia nudie pics." I was not disappointed; Well done Bad Horse, you -unlike certain other ponies- actually follow through with your good "bad" jokes.
Oh, she's not sexy now. I guess you've never been to a Dress Club. For Equestrians, who go about naked all the time, putting clothing on is the equivalent of the human taking clothing off.
Oh, I remember seeing Morning Wood doing her routine at the Put-On, gradually adding more and more layers of clothing. She started with socks, and worked her way up to a thick winter parka (fake fur, of course) and snow boots. Half the stallions and mares in the audience popped their corks when she pulled up the hood and slapped on snow goggles to complete the look.
Then, alas, the place was raided, and everypony was strip-searched for forbidden garments. The only blot on my official record.
2232657
It was worse during prohibition... (foalish conservatives and their stupid laws, all because Princess Celestia didn't want to wear her regalia for a week)
One death? I think she's slipping. Weren't there eight ponies at that autograph session?
2232657 I like the strip search bit... or are they strip searching to see if any pony has a bit or bridle in their pocket... the height of kink that
2232425
Those black hooves are either real, or some sort of cock-block protective gear. I bet they're super slippery. In fact, it looks like she dipped them in axel grease.
Does this mean your hooves are white, BH? May I see your hooves, please? What, this string of saliva coming off the corner of my mouth? Totally normal. I was just thinking of a delicious fudge sundae and totally not something perverse involving ice and hooves. Just the sundae... mmm ... sundae...
...Edible ice cream hooves... hoofcream sandwiches... mmrrarrarr *drool deluge*
...
Bueno...
2232725
They're searching for strips of cloth, obviously
2232872 Like 5'th element strips of cloth?
Edited in MSPaint... Like a pro!
2232657
You have successfully predicted a gag featured in my next story. Drat. Now it'll look like I was cribbing off of you. Oh well!
2232488 Ah, cool and thanks!
2232425 Hugs are magical!
i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/641/298/448.jpg
2233451
Not my invention, actually. In the Conversion Bureau genre that I write in, Dress Clubs have long been described... for about two years now. But, hey - shared mythos is what makes for cool stories!
2233301
Or maybe with a Sharpie?
2233656
Rats! Oh well, it's all in the execution anyway. No new ideas under the sun, as it were.
2233656
I had Rarity mention 'dress clubs' in one of my one-shots, as well. The only other alternative might be shaved pony clubs, and that's just too freaky to contemplate.
2233907
...he says as we're all on a fanfiction site.
2233907
2234667
2232707
2232725
I forgot! I did a New Yorker-styled cartoon about Dress Clubs! It's in a collection of Bureau cartoons within a bonus appendix to my 'Brand New Universe' reimaginings of the Bureau genre as a whole!
Here is the cartoon:
jenniverse.com/images/tcb%20cartoon%20dress%20club.png
2234861 I hope your new universe is less... controversial than your last one.
Don't have much taste for the shoes, and egads it's the dreaded Celestia 3/4 dogface angle!
But other than that, yay Celestia!
2235112 Shoes?
Apparently I'm the only person who prefers ponies with hooves.
2235214
Oh, is that what they were? Well, far be it from me to say that Her Royal Majesty the Sun Regent isn't allowed to have hooves.
However, it is considerably less farther to say black doesn't suit her, and she should go get those things painted pronto. A nice light pink, perhaps? Let's ask Twilight.
Try as I may, I can't see this pic as something sexual. It's kinda freaking me out. I like, want to see it as something sexual, but I can't for some reason. This is disturbing for me, for seeing the sexual nature of things usually comes easy. Maybe it's the look on Celestia's face (actually, a lot to do with it), or maybe it's because my eyes are drawn to her black hooves and my thoughts go to things such as Sharpies, ice cream treats, Oreos, and tap dancing shoes. Oh, and penguins. Celestia now reminds me of fluffy penguins who belly-toboggan down ice caps.
I guess the food aspect could be sexual, but it's making me want to eat stuff more, and I see that more as a separate thing to fetishy fuel; eating is eating. Food fetishes are cool though, I guess.
Ok, rather than trying to go about how sexualized Celly, One with Sharpie Hooves is, I think I'll derail this a bit.
fimfiction-static.net/images/story_images/143032.png?1383452678
Stolen cover art from Abyss's story.
I dunno. I think Celly being nekkie evokes images of vulnerability, yet often these pics show her underlying strength.
And she looks adorable hugging Luna like that.
I think Sombra looks cute nekkie, too, in the like 1 pic I've seen him without armour. Well, not necessarily in a sexual way. And that pic was actually sexual since it was on Princess Molestia XD
I remember one pic of Luna resting on Celly. It was done up kinda realistically, they had split hooves due to artistic license, and the light from their manes was glowing off their coats. And they were nekkie. I'll see if I can find it again. I really liked the lighting effects on it.
I propose undermining BH's blog post by posting pics of non-sexualized nekkie Celly (and Luna, cause she seems to be found in those same pics a lot). Bonus points if it's nekkie Celly eating cake and/or ice cream ^.^
And that's my bad deed for the day- wait. Is this a good deed? I am confused 0_o
2235302 2234894 2234861 2234667 2233907 2233907
2233564 2233301 2232872 2232818 2232707 2232617 2232488 2232482 2232449 2232430 2232418 2232366 2232355 2232346
*bump*
Yeah yeah, I know I'm absolutely annoying everybody. But before you dismiss me, and down vote bomb, have a look at this!
fc01.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2012/168/b/e/alicorn_haven_by_raikoh_illust-d53ubof.jpg
It is a nekkie Celestia and Luna. They are glowing with radiance and beauty. And nuclear rainbow manes. It simultaneously fits in with BH's blog's topic, yet also undermines it because there's nothing sexual about it.
There's my good/bad deed for today. The pic is all pretty and glowy! ^_^ Doesn't it make you feel better and calm and all that good stuff? And possibly make you wonder if nekkie=glowing?
2236268
That looks nice, very nice.
2236268 Her regalia suppresses her radiant glow, which would otherwise overcome her subjects with awe. (And cancer.)
2236268
Don't worry, your not annoying me.
2235515
Sounds fun to me!
Here's a semi-canon nekked Celestia:
derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTMvMDQvMjQvMTVfMTNfNDhfNjcyXzMwNzEyOV9fVU5PUFRfX3NhZmVfcHJpbmNlc3NfY2VsZXN0aWFfd2V0X21hbmVfc3BvaWxlcl9jb21pY181MTc3ZWRiYmE0YzcyZDQ3M2MwMDAwZGEuanBnIl1d/307129__safe_princess-celestia_wet-mane_spoiler-comic_5177edbba4c72d473c0000da.jpg
(IDW comic)
s3.amazonaws.com/bronibooru/6c8e43396d87e2837f9244ffc19ddf9a.jpg
Singing in the shower
fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2013/038/9/8/golden_slumbers__by_britishstarr-d5u6vgr.png
Diabeetus inducingly cute
derpicdn.net/img/2013/7/14/373795/full.png
Just plain funny
I haven't looked at the pic yet. I was very careful about that.
But I fully expect it to be something along the lines of "Ah, Rarity? We don't normally wear clothes."
Was not disapoint. Also, like 2232346 says.
2235515
Luna has "hawt eyes" in that pic. It's confusing me.
Maybe I should go find that story.
2236268 Damn son!
2236289 There's always a catch
2236268 i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/632/577/774.gif
2236345 How'd you find these? I tried googling "princess celestia nude". It didn't work. Well, not the way I wanted it to.
2236749
Because I'm awesome?
You need to carefully define your search terms, young grasshopper.
All those that I just posted were an image search of "Celestia in a bathtub", since I knew that she was shown in a bathtub in the IDW comic.
I also had good success with the google image search "Celestia without regalia." That had beauties like this
th01.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/i/2013/096/9/2/celestia_by_fikakorv-d60ng42.png
this
static1.e926.net/data/cc/52/cc52cc57c5885bc30b51bd136d7fe134.png
this
s4.hostingkartinok.com/uploads/images/2012/10/07636399e90b6649f33550af3102a390.jpg
and this
fc00.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2011/252/5/9/naked_celestia_by_virenth-d49cfwj.png
(i have no idea what's going on there)
And just to annoy Bad Horse, here is one that also includes a small pink blank spot in the foreground in the general shape of his denial:
Clicky Clicky
2237268
No doubt fueling his displeasure is the fact that she goes around nekkid all the time, unlike tall and pearly.
2237268 Isn't that your OC from your alternate universe story series?