An issue revisited.

You may or may not have read this blog post from a few weeks ago.
If not, I'll summarize. I read a story that was very popular and it left me with a feeling that it was lacking in some of the must fundamental ways, but I couldn't seem to put my finger on what it was beyond being a predictable and tired use of previously written material that had been handled better by other writers.
Well, I think I know what was wrong with it.

Conflict, or the lack thereof.

You see, in this story there are three notable characters. A and B taking the majority with a side mention of C. A is a new character who has some odd 'proclivities', B is an established character, and C is a side character who has a few lines of dialogue and a role to play. A and B go to a place do some things, C is there and then A and B leave and do some more things. Pretty standard. Nothing wrong with that.

What drove me up the wall is that the 'proclivities' never develop into anything. When these things come up they are address immediately, okay-ed, and the story goes on to the end. The author tries to build a little suspense with the early use of C, but, because the 'proclivities' are so obvious and expected, it just falls flat. C doesn't raise an eyebrow at A's request, and never finds out about what the 'proclivities' are. When B finds out there is a short few paragraphs of dialogue questioning it and then it is accepted and I would go so far as to say embraced. It's a "WHAT?" kind of moment handled more like a "... what?" only to be quickly explained away. There were no moments of tension or suspense, at no point is there a doubt that things will come to any conclusion that is not favorable for all parties... it was like reading an idyllic story about the new kid at school being accepted by everyone on the first day without ever dwelling on the possibility that things might not workout. If the author had done that, focused on A's internal worries that things might go south and fast, had him sweating bullets waiting for B to pronounce judgement that he was found wanting, scorned forever by society and forced to flee, never to return. Then it would have worked, but he didn't and it doesn't.

So that's what I wanted to point out. Conflicts, internal or external, are the flesh hooks that drag your readers in and Suspense is the chain that pulls them along for the ride.

Then again, what do I know. I'm just a guy who's entire library hasn't gotten half the up-votes as that one story.

-Count Honigwein von Beinehaus

P.S. Kerfuffle is a word, and I love it.

Comments

[Tundara]

Kerfuffle is a great word.