Is anyone else a bit creeped out by the Crystal Empire? · 5:00pm Feb 9th, 2013
So a new land (the Crystal Empire) is discovered! Flat-tone (for want of a better word) ponies move in and overthrow the ruler of the land, who was, let's be fair, a bit evil.
Celestia then installs her (neice?) Princess Cadance as the new ruler of the Crystal Ponies because the Crystal Ponies can't govern themselves, can they? They need a flat-tone pony to look after them.
Trains bring new shops and industry to the Crystal Kingdom, we see flat-tone ponys acting as sellers. They are the new merchant class.
Cadance has an important job that needs doing - she needs some ponies to show around the games inspector, so she invites her flat-tone pony friends, who know nothing about the Crystal Empire. They've been there once. Those Crystal Ponies can't do it, bless them.
Cadance needs her mane styled. She gets Rarity to do it, none of the Crystal Ponies can be trusted with such a task!
Who put her in charge anyway?
The Crystal Empire is the Flat-tone pony's burden.
...just saying.
There's a story idea here somewhere, but I'm not sure what yet that goes beyond "bloo bloo this has colonial implications, CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE". I can't imagine all the Crystal Ponies being happy with this state of affairs though. "Sombra may have been an evil cruel overlord, but at least he was OUR evil cruel overlord!"
(Before people start moaning, I am comparing the pony occupation of the Crystal Empire to 18th century British colonial expansion, not Iraq or anything like that, though if they show an episode where Pinkie Pie is drilling for oil to import back to Canterlot I will gladly go back on that point. Also I am one of those people who tend to completely miss 'problematic' things like this, and yet it struck me pretty hard!)
Don't worry, Blue. We still love you.
WAY TO OVERANALYZE THE CARTOON BROSKI
Next you'll point out that the breathing exercise Twi & Cadance were doing looks like a seig hail
Only Blueshift would see this. That said...it makes a scary amount of sense. Wow.
Silly Blueshift, Saddle Arabia has all the oil Equestria needs! How is Celestia supposed to unite all pony kind beneath a horned and winged banner without blatant nepotism? Besides, the crystal ponies allowed themselves to be enslaved by Sombra, how could equestrians trust them with the power of democracy? An autocratic plutocracy is clearly the only option. /s.
Also, Spike saved the Crystal Empire, and didn't even warrant an invite. Not cool, Cadence.
Suit yourself. Maybe this makes you think of English colonialism, but personally, Iraq was the first thing I thought when I heard the synopsis of "Crystal Empire" for the first time. Ah well, at least Operation Crystal Happiness doesn't seem to be met with too impressive of an insurgency yet.
I knew I wasn't the only one who saw this. Celestia has basically traded out one evil dictator with another (though this one is pink and has Princess in the title). So, they can't even rule themselves, but rather must be ruled by a pony who isn't even a Crystal Pony? That'd be like the United States having a President who was born in Australia or Britain. Though this could all be an evil plan by Celestia to rule the world by liberating countries and leaving a Princess to rule the people and report directly back to her.
Actually, I always read Sombra as having taken over, rather than being native to the Empire. Also, you want implications? Where are all the Crystal Unicorns and Pegasi? Just Crystal Earth Ponies as far as the eye can see. Sombra has much to answer for.
810868
Yeah but that's because they have this mind-control Crystal Heart.
Maybe the crystal ponies are just to... to..... submissive...
810877
That's a good point. I assume there are Crystal unicorns and pegasi if only because we have toys of them in the blindbags (is it really only earth-ponies in the background, I must say I've not studied it closely)
(Before people start moaning, I am comparing the pony occupation of the Crystal Empire to 18th century British colonial expansion, not Iraq or anything like that, though if they show an episode where Pinkie Pie is drilling for oil to import back to Canterlot I will gladly go back on that point. Also I am one of those people who tend to completely miss 'problematic' things like this, and yet it struck me pretty hard!)
I laughed a little too hard.
I thought that Cadence was sort of princess of the Crystal Empire from before it disappeared, anyway?
I mean, it explains why Celestia and Luna have such a... muted colour scheme by comparison.
810902
Now see, if they had literally done that, it would have been much better. She turns crystal but then so do the mane 6, then she turns back again. If she was always a crystal pony exiled from the empire or something (and lets face it, given the short gap between season 2 finale and season 3 opener, both were probably in development at around the same time) it would have been a lot more cohesive.
Is turning crystal like Cadance and the mane 6 did the Crystal Pony version of blackface?
Civilization follows the flag, Blue. You can't trust those yokels to rule themselves. Best to put a scion of the royal family on the throne.
I've always been keen on knowing, how do they teach the American revolution across the pond? Because, over here, it's notably bias with a few sprinklings of true events that can't be skipped over. Granted, my teacher was quick to correct the bias that the book had within it, but if one were to read the book solely, their knowledge of history might be a little skewed.
So, Bluey? How do they teach the colonization over there?
810878
... Hell, now that I think about it, Cadence's cutie mark and magical abilities scare me more than the politics of the matter.
"Say what you will about King Sombra, but at least he made the trains run on time."
810902 not to forget the fact that Cadence's cutie mark is the Crystal Heart, which I guess translates into her rule of the Empire being predestined
810912
Yeah, but that was the entire ethos behind colonialism. "These indigenous people can't rule themselves so we will need to look after them. Also we will give them small amounts of authority in the hope they can pull themselves up, but give all the important jobs (ie look after the Equestrian games inspector) to the white man. Ah, what a heavy burden we have!)
Curse you Celestia!
I realise I'm overanalysing it, but sometimes it's the stuff that passes without comment that is the most problematic because the ideas and tropes are so ingrained in our culture. Like how there was a massive outcry over Derpy (which wasn't offensive) but no-one cared about Screwloose the insane mental patient who is literally barking like a dog and should be laughed at (which is actually incredibly offensive, but it's an ingrained cultural trope so you don't really notice). I'm sure I'm guilty of many similar things. In fifty years time, what will we look back on and cringe over? I bet it won't be what you expect.
810912
There's a pro-slavery side?
810915
Honestly? It's barely touched, at least when I was at school (that was a while ago, mind!). Of that era, lessons tended to concentrate more on social reform and the industrial revolution, and how that horrible set of circumstances sorted itself out, as well as the entirety of colonialism, which focused more on Africa and India.
810902
810904
Princess Cadence can't have been the former ruler of the Crystal Empire. The flashbacks about her babysitting Twilight in the Season 2 finale showed her as an adolescent, which means that she definitely can't be 1000 years old, unless the ageing processes of alicorns are really strange. However, in the second part of The Crystal Empire she was called "Crystal Princess" by a crystal pony in the background when she caught the Crystal Heart (see http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=twk9WneUt4A#t=2222s), so she seems to be somewhat related to whoever ruled the Crystal Empire before Sombra took over.
Yes, that creeped me out too. Fight the power!
810924
"Hi guys, I know I've just murdered your ruler by spearing them like a javelin and exploding them into bits, and you're keen to rebuild, but look. Now, this is a bit awkward, but I've got a tattoo of a crystal heart on my butt, which means I've gotta rule you. Sorry!"
810924
This is very true. For a land that had vanished for 1000 years, the connecting rail line was very well maintained!
Pinkie Pie would be drilling for chocolate. Please, actually watch the show something :(
blueshift.
blueshift.
It's niece you heathen.
Also, we all know those poor crystal ponies can't look after themselves, they need a civilized colonial power to show them how things should be done. In their own kingdom. Which they overthrew by military coup.
810933
There was at the time, Amit! All these perfectly respectable folk justifying it on all sorts of grounds (a lot of them economic, of course, since slavery = cheap labour = cheap goods. Don't want to give that up). A lot of politicians did not want to come out against slavery either, because many of their voters were slave owners or supported it, so were very much on the fence. "Got to respect their beliefs, there are two sides to every argument" etc etc.
Of course that would never happen nowadays! Everyone in power works on moral and ethical grounds, not economic, power and prejudice!
I have this insane fanon theory that Cadence belongs to a lost royal empire line that was shattered when Sombra took over. Then her family was in exile or hiding or something. Celestia later rescued & recovered Cadence and took her in, groomed her for her inevitable return. Her cutiemark seems to include the crystal heart and maybe indicate that she belonged to the Crystal Empire before she even returned there. Why she's not sparkly all the time, I don't know. She can probably turn it on and off now.
Or it could be weird-flank colonization, yeah.
That's a bit awful. The British created an environment by its policies in collusion with the zamindari whereby famines killed millions of people, reinforcing dependence on British administration. They have killed hundreds and thousands directly by oppression, and their attempt at playing sociologist - the Partition - has led directly to the deaths of hundreds of thousands and indirectly to the deaths of hundreds of millions.
The British have generally carried in Bengal the title of 'thieves of the world' amongst those who have survived them, and comparing them favourably to Bush's administration is an awful, inhuman disservice to America and a compliment which the Empire does not warrant any more than Hitler is to be praised for having built roads.
810972
As an actual History graduate, that post gave me cancer.
810967
OR Sombra is her dad!
810972
Point taken.
Thanks for spoiling it for those of us who haven't seen the episode.
810978
And her mother is the crystal heart.
I think I see it as more akin to the British in China. You have this ancient empire filled with all sorts of culture and traditions and art and treasure, but unfortunately they've let things slide a bit the past few centuries and now they're being led by an evil emperor. Suddenly the
white peopleflat-tone ponies show up, overthrow the emperor, and start importing opium.Now, that would be a good fanfic.
Well what determines if one's a crystal pony or not? At the end of Crystal empires part 2, everypony was all crystaly and transparent. In this episode, not so much. Cadence and Shining Armor looked normal. Maybe Earth Ponies just hold on to the crystal magic stuff better, and the Empire mostly has Earth Pony residents?
Oh, and of course the people working on the show don't even give these things a second though because, hey, children's magical pony show.
When you think about it, though, why -wouldn't- Equestria annex the Crystal Empire? It's a single city in the far north that doesn't even have electricity. Rather than try and pay for all that crap, it's easier to just be folded into the dominant power in the region and get uplifted for free.
810977
check yo privilege
That being said, this is what I've been told by a person who was forced to evacuate his home during the Partition; a 'history' degree - and this is laughable, because the modern history of any country is usually so bloody complicated that anyone who would claim a 'history' degree as basis for the slightest modicum of expertise in anything even remotely related to the history of a specific nation - I personally do not believe that would carry weight any more than a degree in prelaw would allow one to claim a thorough understanding of the Somali informal legal system.
810981
What on earth exactly did you expect when you saw the title?
811009>>811013 The thing about history is, there's more than one version of it.
Personally I take the view that, in times and places, the Empire did great good, and in other times and places it did great evil. That's because it was a human structure, administered by human beings, built over other human beings. Few could argue that ending Suttee and wiping out the thugee cultists was a bad thing for India. Bringing medicine and trade, reforming their government and so forth were likewise good things in the broad scope. On the other hand, the mutiny happened for very justifiable (and a few very silly) reasons.
The problems occur when people take events of the period, apply their particular shade of rose tinted glasses to to it and attempt to cherry-pick from the resulting mishmash of opinion and fantasy to support a particular agenda. The reality is, shit happened. Shit stinks to high heaven and grows roses. It is simply what is.
811013 Him talking about a story he read.
811013
Ha ha, oh wow. We've got a live one here.
A history degree is less about history and more about understanding the context of historical happenings. For example:
British colonialism was bad, but better than the system the natives had before. You keep harping about the partition, but before the British millions upon millions of Indians were ruled by a religious minority who set their emperor up as a living god. Millions died from malnourishment, invasions, in-fighting, and rebellion. There was no social mobility, no technological advancement, no religious freedom. The British rule was harsh, but the lessons the Indians and Pakistanis learned were many and varied. It's because of the British that India is on the cusp of becoming a world military, economic, and political power here in the 21st century.
Am I apologizing for British colonial rule? No. Am I telling you that any rational, educated person puts it within a certain framework? Yes. It doesn't take a history degree to not be a reactionist malcontent.
811013
Did you just say that anyone claiming to have a degree in history shouldn't be able to talk about having a detailed knowledge of history? And did you just someone who studied history enough to get a degree in it to "check their privilege" compared to (apparently) your own second-hand anecdotal knowledge?
...Because it looked like you did.
811009
Sort of the point i would make.
Id like to think that a truly benevolent ruler could sort of introduce modernization without falling into the smash culture, grab resouces/power trap colonialism did.
Also, Celestia and luna were there a thousand years ago, so for all we know the crystal ponies still see them as the rightful rulers with nothing much changed. Depending on your view of divine mandate, cel/luna might literally have/be one, and the crystal ponies might see absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Also, despite being called an empire, its a single city, within the territory of a larger state, that seems to have been either part of it or at least in a strong relation or vassal role, before it became inacessible for a time.
Then, they want to impress or whatever (havent seen the episode yet) the equestrian games inspector, so having someone who is familliar with modern equestria for more than a few months might be helpful there
Also cutie marks, that cuts both ways. Not only will everyone accept that somepony is good at what their cutiemark says, that is literally magically true.
And, modernization on the whole helps a lot if done right in theory, and as i said i would hope/think that celestia can do it right.
811056
Plus, Cadance knows that making Auntie Celestia pay for all of the modernization weakens Equestria's coffers, which will help when she inevitably revolts with Princess Twilight to overthrow the Diarchy.
It doesn't bother me becsuse I just see the crystal ponies as normal ponies who have been irradiated by crystal magic.
Equestria is Krypton.
shut the fuck up buttercup
(no offense intended, but this blogpost is just... yeah.)
im more creeped out by their shininess.
so are celestia and luna actually crystal ponies, explaining their crazy manes?