Ascend Deleted Scenes #8 · 2:46am Jan 12th, 2013
Chapter Fourteen was a pain to write. This is mainly due to the fact that it was very dry and boring on the first go around. I also had problems with how it ended. I debated for a short time over how the “earth pony” portion of the test would go. Ideas like tree bucking, gardening, and running on a treadmill were all thought up and discarded. None of them were funny or provided any drama. They were boring and would drag down an already dull chapter. I settled on having Twilight shot. It's not funny, but it at least is more dramatic then watching a tomato plant grow.
Unfortunately, this came with a big problem: Celestia was in court with Twilight. No matter how hard I tried, I simply could not see her letting Twilight get shot. I decided to cut her from most of the chapter and use an OC in her stead. Hopefully, Red Daisy made things a little less dull. What helped my decision is the fact that, after this next scene, Celestia literally disappeared from the rest of the chapter. Instead of forcing her in, I cut her. This scene plays out similarly in the final cut but I can actually do the crossbow scene without having to cringe at Celestia not helping Twilight.
...After all, when else did the court get to decide on a new Princess? Okay, so it had done so twice in the last century, but the point still stands.
Twilight sat next to Celestia at one of the tables. Every once in a while, she would glance back at the hundred plus ponies staring at her.
“Are you sure everything is going to be alright, Princess?”
“Trust me, Twilight. Everything will be fine. Once the High Court finishes the Bench Trial Test, we can get you back to the Castle. You're friends should be there soon after we get back.”
“Bench Trial Test?”
Celestia looked over to Twilight with a bemused smile.
“You mean to tell me that the unicor—er former unicorn who spent hundreds of hours in the Canterlot Archives and who knew each of the guard's names by heart doesn't know what the Bench Trial Test is?”
Twilight looked away, embarrassed.
“That shocks me more then your wings do.”
“Princess!”
“Alright. The Bench Trial Test, named for Chief Justice Bench Trial—who I might say was a crotchety, bitter old stallion who could never take a jo—”
Twilight stared at he mentor.
“Anyway, it's a test the High Court implemented to determine whether somepony is an alicorn. It consists of three parts: weather, magic, and endurance. These are supposed to test the three components that make up an alicorn. Personally, I think it's all just a bunch of hot air, but—” Celestia shrugged, “we have courts for a reason and that's to make sure the lawyers have something to do.”
Before Twilight could respond, the bailiff entered to address the crowd.
“All rise.”
Those in attendance stood.
“The Honorable Chief Justice Docket Number, Associate Justice Quidpro Quo, Associate Justice Loophole Abuse, Associate Justice Kangaroo Court, Associate Justice Hung Jury, Associate Justice Habius Corpus, Associate Justice Writof Certiorari, Associate Justice Activist Judge, and Associate Justice In Rem.”
At each of the judges names, they all entered and took their seats, except for In Rem, who was wheeled in in a wheelchair. The wrinkled old stallion had an oxygen mask attached to his muzzle and a tank by his side.
“You may be seated.”
Everypony sat down.
Docket Number looked over to Celestia.
“Let's get this emergency session of the High Court underway. What matter could be so important as to interrupt the court's docket?”
Justice Quo put on her reading glasses and looked up.
“Yes, we were in the middle of Ace Swift v Equestrian Speedway Corporation and would to continue the case as soon as possible.”
Celestia stood up.
“The Crown has requested this session per article six of the Constitution.”
All the Justices except In Rem, who seemed to be staring off into space, looked at the Solar Diarch in shock. The Justices sounded off in rapid succession.
“Article Six?!”
“This better not be another gene project.”
“That would explain the mobs I saw earlier.”
“Not again.”
In Rem gurgled unintelligibly.
Docket Number lightly tapped his gavel to silence his fellow members.
“If article six is in play, then that would mean...”
He glanced over to the purple alicorn sitting next to Celestia. She smiled sheepishly.
“Ah, your student. Well then, there's no point in panicking and running around like our heads have been cut off.” he looked to the far end of the bench at In Rem, “Not that most of us can run. Can we all agree that the Bench Trial Test is required?” he looked to his fellow Justices, who nodded, “Very well then. Bailiff, please gather the necessary components for the Test.”
The bailiff departed.
“I must say, Your Majesty, that after Luna, I never expected the Court to be considering Article Six again.”
“Believe me, Docket, neither did I.”
I debated fiercely on whether or not to cut this scene. On the one hand, it's funny. On the other, its an Innocent Innuendo/Molestia joke—something that's done to death in comedies. I could feel myself jumping over a shark when I wrote it. I eventually decided to cut the scene. What helped that decision was the severe mood whiplash that it produced. You go from Twilight being shot, to a Molestia joke, and right back to Twilight nearly breaking down in tears. It was too jarring.
The secretary said the Princess was around here somewhere.'
Twilight walked through the halls of Canterlot Castle, trying to find her mentor. She glanced down the side halls and checked the open rooms.
'Where is she?'
The purple alicorn came up to a door labeled “Janitorial Break Room”. After giving it a passing glance, she turned to leave.
“At last. We are alone.”
She abruptly stopped and turned back to the room.
'Princess?'
“You thought you could escape me?”
Celestia's voice sounded different.
“There is no escaping me.”
Twilight's face grew worried.
“The press will expose me? Pfff. They already tried once and look what happened.”
'What's the Princess doing?'
“Soon, your moist cream will be inside me, filling me with warmth and comfort.”
'…!'
Twilight dared to open the door.
“P-Princess? Is everything alright.”
Celestia looked over in shock, an entire chocolate frosted sheet cake laying in front of her on one of the break room tables.
“T-Twilight! What are you doing here?”
'Thank Luna. For a second there—you know what? Let's just drop it.'
“I wanted to see you.”
“Why?”
“The High Court.” Twilight looked away, “I-It didn't go well.”
"That shocks me more then your wings do."
I believe you mean than
702245
I don't edit the deleted scenes. This was literally what was written, without any editing or rereading.
Bam!
I liked the deleted scenes, but I have to agree with you about the mood whiplash.
Would I be correct in assuming In Rem stands for 'In Remission' ?
Reread the first part about three times trying to find the Molestia joke before I realized there was a second deleted part.
Actually.....the Molestia one was pretty funny....kinda wish you kept that one.
702304
In Rem is a legal term.
702366
Huh, you learn something new every day. Thanks.
I liked the title of the book you had Daisy reading.
I'm glad you left the joke out lol. you did great.
702252
Your avatar scares me :l
702574
Everybody says that. C'mon, what's not to like about Tweyelight Sparkle?
Should be
And before you say "Unedited deleted scene", it is still in the final version as well.
702307
same here
702610 I finally found the comic that picture's in. Hentai!Shipper!Twilight is....well, it makes me feel less guilty about spending so much time on this site, that's for sure. I do like the "Grinch Twilight" face best though.
703002
I was going to use that one, but Tweyelight had me in tears from laughing so hard the first time I saw it that I had to use it.
I liked both versions... but i did enjoy the cake one more...
702245 Really? REALLY? You're going to nitpick on DELETED SCENES!? You're some kinda hardcore
Hm, the Molestia joke also smacked of Spaceballs. "No Sir, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!"
702610
Which is scarier? Tweyelight Sparkle, or The dreaded Twicrab?
applejack.ponychan.net/chan/files/src/134884430592.gif
703395 Twicrab: Hiiiiiiii Giiiiiiiirrrrlllllllllllsssss.
703395
Twicrab is best SMG crab.
703395 Spycrab is better fc06.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2011/298/f/5/red_spy_crab_by_wild_fire_1187-d4dzcg9.gif
Heh, yeah, I think you made the right call with cutting the Molestia gag. It's funny, yes, but when you compare it with the rest of the chapter, it does seem out of place.
Speaking of which, was Celestia eating cake just because she got a craving, or because she was in need of some comfort food (given it had been a stressful day for everypony and all that)?
702252
Like I said in my comment of the actual chapter, the Earth Pony test could've been a set of physical exercises that Earth Ponies would excel at; in other words, Twilight would've had to do a workout session in front of the court (maybe have some background music to set the mood for that part) and the results compared with Earth Pony Athletes.
Gosh dang it, now I've got Guile's theme stuck in my head for some reason. *laughs*
Maybe you could edit the chapter and squeeze it in?
NOTE: Not to replace the crossbow portion (I think that should remain, against my better judgement, so as not to mess up the rest of the chapter.), but something before that test but after the Pegasi and Unicorn portions of course.
OFF TOPIC:
Anyway, for the first deleted scene, I liked this part:
I also think this should be squeezed in via editing as well. It could be adjusted so that it could've been somewhat of a short briefing by Celestia outside of the courtroom, just after meeting Red Daisy, right before Twilight and Red Daisy went inside.
Unsure about the second deleted scene though; I liked the humor in it, but may have been out of place.
On one hoof, I might have been out of place. On the other, it would made a good comedy relief moment.
Hmmmmm......Shoot!......
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw2526-132764777691.jpg
Anyway, keep up this brilliance.
703904 It could be both.
I accept the Molestia scene as Fannon!