Old habits may die hard, but I still need help

Hi everyone. If you're reading this, you've probably read my story The Experiments, which is on itself an experiment. First time I write in ages (I'm not saying how many years), first porn (let's face it, it's porn covered in narration, like Hellraiser), and overall first truly dark fic I ever write.

[Adult story embed hidden]

Because of that, despite having my own experience with writing beforehand, I'm a bit lost on the finer points. As many of you may have picked up, my pacing, descriptions and overall grammar are far from good. It would do me some good to have feedback on those. Plus, I'm a prima dona (which is the diplomatic way to say I'm an attention whore), so I'd love to have more comments to talk with.

But I have no idea on how to promote stories nowadays. Specially this [waves at the non-Newtonian anatomy and sexy horror] thing I'm writing.

So, you would be doing me a solid if you helped promote this story while I write chapter 2. Add it to other groups (huge thanks to Tranquility_Soul for already adding it to Futaquestria and My Little Fetish groups).