Apr
8th
2023
Well, it's starting. · 5:57pm Apr 8th, 2023
I knew it would eventually.
"You should go. Never know who you might meet with similar interests, tastes, and attitude."
Family and friends are starting to try and push my introverted self out to public events to meet another special someone.
I know they mean well.
But I am not ready to put myself out there again, and don't know when or if I will be ready.
Because I've experienced firsthand what someone with similar tastes, interests, and attitude can turn into.
And I won't go through that again.
Do I get lonely being single? Absolutely.
Know what else I get?
A surprising lack of drama.
Start pushing your family to take up juggling flaming chainsaws. It's the same thing.
5721880
Soft disagree.
If something happens to you while juggling the chainsaws, you have yourself and only yourself to blame.
One even though it might be nice to meet someone you like if they are being too pushy tell them to back the more sensible ones will listen the rest well you got club handy because that's the only way short of miracle that you are going get it in.
I don’t know what you went through with in your last relationship, but I will not ask. I can tell it is something that is personal. Just know that whether or not you decide to find someone to share a connection with again, it is your choice and your choice alone. I understand where your family is coming from, but at the end of the day, it is up to you if you want to take that step. You are your own person and that needs to be respected no matter what others think. Please do not take this as me saying you should meet someone, because I can tell you have no plans to. All I’m saying is that you should not forget there’s always a choice. It’s up to you what you want your life to be and no one else’s.
yep
I see this happen in online media and groups all the time.
As someone who had a 9 year relationship and has now been almost 10 years without an SO I both agree and disagree with your position. Don't go looking, sure but don't close your heart off to the possibility either.
The big issue I have is, your judging what others might be like, based on a bad previous person.
No your family should not be pushing you like that, but, you should not be hiding yourself away afraid to try again. Find the balance point in there, slow steps, don't rush in, don't hold back too much.
Everything has a middle ground.
How long has it been since the divorce? One, two years? Given what family is like, I'm surprised the well-intentioned prodding didn't happen sooner.
What kind of public events? Because if something like a con, you go because you want to go to the con. I don't go anywhere with the sole purpose of finding a new significant other.
Other than that, yeah. I think everyone else, you included, covered everything.
5721944
2.5 years since the separation (him leaving while I was at work) and 14 months since the divorce was finalized.
No, nothing like a con. Was a "video game concert" downtown at an arts center.
When I discovered it was free, I began to immediately question the size and quality of the performance.
Luckily it was livestreaming as well, so I took a look at that and had my suspicions confirmed. It was a quintet, and most game music I like requires more performers than that.
I would like to get to a convention again. I wanted to go to an HCS LAN tournament, but nothing even remotely close to me this year.
After watching my brother go through 3 bad relationships before meeting his wife, the last of which he still has to deal with because she's my niece's bio-mom, AND watching a couple friends with relationships that ended badly, I've come to the conclusion that relationships are overrated.
If I someday find someone, great, but I'm not going to go looking. And my brother has 3 kids total now, so it's not like I need to help continue the family or anything either.
5721924
He's not hiding. He's waiting.
He'll know when the time is right.