Dream Space
Sweetie Belle was floating through space. A sea of stars surrounded her, one she could swim through easier than any ocean. They did not burn her as she might have expected; instead, they emitted a pleasant warmth, not unlike the hugs she often shared with her marefriends. She reached towards one with a hoof and watched as it was pushed away from her, as if whatever gravity governed this realm had determined they should be apart. Or perhaps it was magnetism. A question to ask Twilight later.
She drifted like that for a length of time completely indeterminate to her. It felt like hours, but in reality was likely minutes. Eventually, though, she remembered what Luna had said, and what she was supposed to be doing.
Sweetie closed her eyes, took a deep breath, centered herself, and—
Suddenly she landed on the ground without any of the grace Luna had displayed whenever Sweetie had seen her do this. At least this time she hadn’t fallen over. Sweetie exhaled, opened her eyes, and observed how the world around her had changed.
There was sand beneath her hooves, with that perfect amount of give. The stars no longer floated freely, but had arranged themselves in constellations in the sky. A beautiful tree grew twisted towards the ocean, but it was not gnarled; rather, it was bent in a pleasing way, creating a comfortable resting spot and aesthetic centerpoint.
Water lapped at the shore of her little beach, and seafoam turned to bubbles that floated past and around her. In the future, they might contain dreams, but she lacked the proper experience to use dream magic outside of her own mind.
Her own mind. An infinitesimal blip in the broad swath of minds that did exist, would exist, and had existed.
Storm clouds gathered overhead, but she paid them no mind.
She was small. Pathetic, weak, talentless. The best dream space she could create, and it was just a shoddy, imperfect replica of Luna’s own. Always in the shadows, with no way to escape.
The sea had evaporated now, and the tree reduced to ash. Lightning struck the sand around her, the intense heat transforming it into glass. The stars were no longer bright and tranquil, but blinding and bleeding.
Sweetie Belle panicked. She called upon her magic, picturing the arcane runes and formulas required to cast the spells Twilight had taught her, spells that would surely calm this down. But her horn fizzled, the realm of dreams operating under a completely different set of magic rules than the waking world. Luna had surely taught her something to deal with this, but any memories of dream spells had fled her now. She could neither control this nor escape it.
Powerless again. An ant trying to pull upon the mystic powers of gods.
“Luna? Luna, are you there?” she shouted. But she received no response.
The ground rushed up to greet her as she fell, sobbing and pleading for Luna to save her, over and over again.
And then a jolt struck her, running through her body with more intensity than any lightning bolt could. With a gasp, she shot up, and she was back in Luna’s chambers.
The Princess of the Night regarded her with concern, and Sweetie Belle felt the urge to curl in on herself, to become as small as she felt. Luna must have noticed this, as her countenance changed immediately, becoming more neutral and detached. Sweetie slowly sat up properly, a wary ease settling her nerves somewhat.
By Sweetie’s estimation, Luna was a master of emotions in a way that rivaled even the most powerful of changelings.
“I am most glad to see that you are relatively unharmed, Sweetie Belle.”
Sweetie Belle laughed, and even she could not pin down what emotion was contained within. Bitterness, perhaps, or maybe simple hysteria. It was not pleasant, either way. Nothing about the past several minutes had been.
“‘Relatively’ is carrying a lot of weight in that sentence.”
Luna nodded slightly in acknowledgement. “That is a fair assessment, indeed. I did not mean to make light of what you have experienced, but merely to tell you that I was glad you did not suffer greater consequences.” Luna looked off into space, eyes unfocused, and Sweetie could feel the deep, incomprehensible sadness of the loss suffered by an immortal seeping into her bones. “There are many I have seen reduced to shells by this magic: friends, foes, and strangers alike.”
Sweetie nervously rubbed the pillow she sat on. “I, uh, take it that’s your way of telling me that I’m out of my depth here, and that I should just go back to Ponyville.”
Luna shook her head, a glint of panic entering her eyes. “No!” She paused, took a deep breath, and projected stoicness once more. “No, Sweetie Belle, that is not what I meant. It has been centuries since I have met a pony with such potential as you with dream magic, and I would very much like to continue mentoring you on the subject.”
Sweetie looked away and rubbed the back of her neck nervously. “I appreciate the kind words, but I know you’ve met more talented ponies before. I mean, you know Twilight, Starlight, and Sunset! All of them know so much more about magic than me, and have larger mana pools too.”
“That may be, but you know that the dream realm operates under different magical rules than the waking world.” Sweetie grimaced, and Luna nodded knowingly. “Ah, I see that you now have firsthoof experience with that. It is not a terribly pleasant experience, to know that power you should have is seemingly gone.”
“Yeah, that’s an understatement,” Sweetie grumbled, then blinked. “Wait, you didn’t know that happened already? But… I thought you were going to be there with me.”
“I attempted to be, but your mind was closed off, and to enter would have had deleterious effects on you. All I could do was observe your opaque bubble, waiting for any signs of distress. And, when I saw them, I woke you.”
“Oh. That makes sense, I guess? I mean, I didn’t know I could close my mind off to you.” Sweetie rubbed her forehead. “I mean, you haven’t had trouble entering my dreams before.”
“Your dreams, yes, but your mind is a different thing. When you enter the dream realm through magic, rather than natural sleep, there is a will to it, and in turn your conscious mind shapes and inhabits the space you create.”
Sweetie looked on in confusion, and Luna tapped a hoof against the floor. “It is the difference between visiting a shop, and breaking into it—if, in the process of breaking into it, you set it alight as well.”
“Okay, I get it now.” Sweetie chuckled. “That’s a good analogy, Princess.”
An analogy she wouldn’t have needed to make if Sweetie was smarter. Her smile slipped as shame and embarrassment set in again, and she looked off to the side, tracing the names of the books on Luna’s shelves without actually reading them. “I’m sorry it’s taking me so long to learn all of this stuff. I’m sure it’s frustrating having to teach me things that just come naturally to you.”
Luna laughed, a full and decidedly unregal sound. Sweetie looked over in surprise, her ears pinned back and cheeks burning. “If you believe the magic of night and dreams has always been something I’ve understood, you are deeply mistaken. And if you truly think I do not enjoy teaching you, you are even moreso.”
The floor in Luna’s room was really nice, in Sweetie’s opinion. Maybe if she stared at it hard enough, she’d be able to melt into it and avoid embarrassing herself any further. But no, instead she heard four hooves clack against the jet black marble, so she forced herself to look up. Luna was standing now, her expression once again stoic and unreadable.
“Walk with me, Sweetie Belle. There is much to talk about, as well as something I would like to show you.”
Sweetie took a few moments to awkwardly stand up, and by the time she had, Luna was already out of her chambers. She rushed to catch up to the princess on shaky hooves, but Luna’s pace was so leisurely that her panic had been entirely unfounded. She sheepishly fell into step with the princess, and took in their surroundings.
The halls of Canterlot Castle were a familiar sight to Sweetie Belle. In her experience, they were beautiful in the day, and lonely at night. But perhaps that was because she spent too much time in the areas around Celestia’s chambers, and not enough around Luna’s. Here the glow of the moon danced through the glass of the large windows, playing upon every surface with a haunting beauty. A pair of thestral guards passed them, giving a respectful nod as they did so.
It was not lonely here, merely different.
“What did you want to talk about, Princess?”
“Do you remember the first thing I taught you, when you first came to me with questions of dream magic?”
“Uh… ‘To understand and accomplish dream magic, you must know thyself’, right?”
Luna nodded. “Correct. Do you understand what I meant by that?”
Sweetie’s brow furrowed as she thought of her answer. “That I need to understand my limitations and be conscious of them, otherwise I will not be able to control whatever happens. But I was conscious of my limitations, my dream space wasn’t malformed in any way, it looked exactly like yours!”
“I trust that you were conscious of your limitations, otherwise the spell would not have cast, but there is an aspect here you are missing. This is not your fault, but mine.” Luna sighed. “It has been countless moons since I last taught somepony these arcane arts, and even then I never was as good at teaching as my sister is.”
“Oh.”
Sweetie found she did not have much to say beyond that, and they walked in silence for a few minutes.
Then, Luna opened an unassuming wooden door, and they walked through into another hall, one that felt older than the other. It felt older than anything else she’d seen in the castle, honestly.
Torches eternally lit with magic flames lined the cobblestone walls, and the sound of dripping water echoed throughout the space. It was narrow, and the space between them shrunk to an inch at most. This was not an uncomfortable change, as the heat radiating from the princess helped ward off some of the chill in this passage.
“The other part of what my instruction meant,” Luna said, continuing as if there had been no pause in their conversation, “is that you must understand your potential. You held yourself back because you were afraid of your limitations, and you created something safe, something you already knew. Do you know why this is a problem?”
Sweetie looked at her and grimaced. “Because what I created was a cheap imitation; it wasn’t original, there wasn’t any worth to it, and it just showed how worthless I am.”
“That is not the problem; your answer is.” Luna smiled at her, but there was no joy in it. “The Nightmare took control of me because I was overconfident in my abilities, and the Tantabus fell out of my control because I lost sight of my potential. Your understanding of yourself must be complete, lest your emotions run wild. There is nothing more dangerous in the dream realm than uncontrolled emotions.”
Sweetie made no response to that, and Luna did not push her on it. They walked in silence until they reached a large, cylindrical room. There was a spiral staircase that ran along the walls, traveling upwards for many floors. The whole space was made of that black marble Luna’s floor was made of, and Sweetie’s mind boggled at how much this would have cost, let alone how it would have been constructed.
“Whoa… This is unbelievable,” Sweetie said, breaking the silence. She instantly regretted it, knowing it made her sound like a fawning tourist rather than a student of two princesses.
“It is quite a sight indeed. My apologies, but to reach our destination we must make the trek to the top now,” Luna said, her tone not apologetic at all.
“There… isn’t any other way? You’re absolutely sure?”
Luna tilted her head. “I do not see any other way, but perhaps there is something I missed.”
Sweetie’s horn glowed, but the teleportation spell she was trying to cast fizzled into nothingness. Her eyes narrowed and brow furrowed. There wasn’t magic suppression in this room, otherwise she would not have even been able to direct mana to her horn. She tried to cast a simple light spell, but as soon as runes entered her mind, her horn fizzled again. Something was at play here to keep her from actually casting anything, but she had no clue what that could be.
Luna was keeping something from her, but it was no use trying to figure it out right now. She wouldn’t bother actually divulging anything to someone as insignificant as herself, and she knew she was too stupid to actually figure it out.
So, with a sigh, she conceded.
“Let’s get this over with.”
The first third of their ascension was no more difficult than the journey through the halls to get here. The second third was brutal, at least for someone as weak and pitiful as herself. Luna wasn’t even winded. The final third was outright torturous, every single muscle in Sweetie’s body burned, yet Luna did not even break a sweat.
Sweetie did not belong here, and it wouldn’t be long before Luna saw her for the fraud she was.
When they finally reached the top of the spiral staircase, Sweetie Belle was gasping for breath, and she struggled not to simply collapse onto the cool marble floor. Whenever she inevitably talked to Apple Bloom and Scootaloo about her experiences here, this bit would be conveniently left out. She’d never hear the end of it otherwise.
“How much farther is it? Please don’t tell me there’s another hallway,” Sweetie panted.
“Do not worry, it is just ahead now, through those doors,” Luna replied, not a hint of breathlessness or exhaustion in her voice.
Sweetie lifted her head to look at the doors, which were stunning, ornate marvels. But, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a metal platform that was floating there, with no visible supports. There were, however, several crystals placed at precise points around its surface, the leylines between them forming a levitation rune. The crystals themselves were likely lift crystals, then, for additional support.
She glared at Luna. “There was an elevator this whole time, and you made us walk up all of those stairs? You said there wasn’t another way up here!”
Luna chuckled, and mirth twinkled in her eyes. “If you’ll recall, I said that there was no other means that I saw, and I did not see this down there. Did you?” Sweetie’s only reply was an intensification of her glare. Luna at least had the grace to bow her head slightly. “Do not worry, we will be taking it down. I apologize for misleading you, but I find taking the stairs makes what you are about to experience more meaningful.”
If Sweetie wasn’t so tired right then, she might have punched Luna in the face. As it was, however, she merely sighed. “Whatever. Let’s just… see what you want to show me, I guess.”
Luna’s horn glowed, and the doors before them slowly swung open. Sweetie waited for whatever breathtaking sight must be awaiting her, some eagerness returning now. The doors were fully open now, and…
It was a balcony. There was intricate tile work on it, depicting scenes she could not make out from this distance, and the railing was as much a work of art as it was functional. It was nicer than balconies she had seen at the castle before, to be sure, but still ultimately just another balcony.
“That’s it? That’s what you wanted to show me? A—A stupid balcony?”
Luna walked forward onto the balcony, and did not turn back to look at Sweetie Belle. “I clearly intend to show you more than a mere balcony, otherwise we would not have needed to leave my chambers.” A twinge of impatience colored Luna’s tone for the first time that night, and Sweetie was reminded that, for as much as Luna was her friend and current mentor, she was also a being as close to a god as any creature of flesh and blood could be. “You may take the elevator now, if you wish to go home to Ponyville tonight, Sweetie Belle.”
Sweetie grumbled. The petulant, petty, short-sighted part of her that had caused plenty of trouble for herself and others over the years told her to take the elevator and be done with this waste of time tonight. The implications of Luna’s ‘offer’ were quite clear, however—if she took that elevator, not only would she lose her chance to learn dream magic for good, but she would also almost certainly damage her friendship with Luna.
She sighed. There was a time, back when she was a teenager, that she might have listened to that side of herself. But as she grew older and became an adult, she’d realized that temporary satisfaction did not trump long term consequences.
With aching legs and hooves that felt like they wore lead shoes, she trudged through the open doorway and onto the balcony. As soon as she did, strength began returning to her, and whatever tiredness or petty frustrations she’d felt began to melt away in turn.
“Look up, Sweetie Belle, and understand why I brought you here.”
Sweetie looked up and gasped. From the normal balconies of the castle, one could look down on Canterlot, true, but one never felt so far away as to be detached from the life of the city. From up here, though, the entirety of Canterlot stretched on beneath her. Buildings looked like birdhouses, or perhaps those blocks that foals played with. Ponies that were still out this late looked like ants wandering to and fro, unaware of how small they really were. The gas lamps and magic lights looked like stars and planets, and the neon glow of the city’s night life was like an aurora. This artificial sky stretched beneath her, while the real sky hung above her.
Unlike the city, which seemed impossibly far away, the sky now felt like it was only meters away, like if she tried hard enough, she might be able to touch the stars. The way the stars floated and danced, like fish playing in a sea, might have been mystifying if not for her prior experiences. She could feel magic flowing from this sky into her, revitalizing her with every passing moment. Sweetie turned to look at Luna, who was regarding her with a soft smile.
“Even with all those stairs… There’s no way the castle could have a balcony this high up, is there? And those stars, the way they move, the magic flowing through them… This is a dream, isn’t it?” Sweetie’s brow furrowed. “I don’t remember falling asleep, though, and I definitely didn’t cast a spell again.”
“You are correct, but only in part.” Luna hummed and walked forward to the railing, and Sweetie found herself following. “This place is not wholly real, but neither is it wholly a dream. Rather, it is a space where the waking and dreaming realms meet, where one who is properly attuned to magic of the night may be able to see both worlds simultaneously. If I brought Twilight here, or Starlight, or Sunset, or even my sister, they would not see the stars to be as close as you do, nor would they see Canterlot to be as distant as you do. This would be nothing more than a particularly ornate balcony from their points of view.”
“But…” Sweetie was at a loss for words, and it took her a moment to collect her thoughts. “Why me? Why can I see all of this, and not them? They’re more powerful than I am; they’re more important than I am.”
“Why do I hold power over the moon? Why does my sister hold power over the sun? Why are your sister and her friends the bearers of the Elements of Harmony?” Luna shook her head. “Thoughts down that road lead to madness, young Sweetie Belle. Every pony is dealt a set of cards, and every pony must make do with them the best they can. Perhaps this is unfair, perhaps it is confusing, or distressing. But ultimately, that is life.”
Sweetie chewed on that thought for a moment, but could think of nothing to say in reply. She slumped against the railing, and felt a wing wrap around her. She looked up, and saw Luna gesturing out at the world of (un)reality around them with her other wing.
“Do you understand now why I have brought you here?”
“Yeah,” Sweetie whispered. “I think I’m ready to try again.”
“Let us return to my chambers, then.”
Sweetie followed Luna to the elevator, and lost herself in thought as they made their way back.
She was small, yes. She was utterly unqualified and undeserving of this magic, it was true. But this was not something unique to her.
No, everything was small, in the grand scheme of things. Even Luna and Celestia were small in the scale of the universe. No one else was uniquely qualified or deserving of whatever powers, gifts, or handicaps they had been given, either.
One of the cards she had been dealt was an affinity for dream magic. This was not good or bad, it simply was. Just another piece of the patchwork that made the whole of her being.
It was terrifying; it was exhilarating. She wanted to run away from it; she wanted to charge headfirst into it. Instead, she would balance in it, on that tightrope that was a complete understanding and acknowledgement of herself.
Before she knew it, they had made it back to that familiar room. Sweetie hadn’t noticed it before, but there was a slight thruming of dream magic flowing through the room, and its presence had a welcome calming effect. Sweetie got comfortable on her pillow, while Luna did the same on her own.
Sweetie took a deep breath, and looked across the room at her mentor.
Luna nodded. “I shall see you soon.”
Sweetie nodded back, and with a flash of runes through her mind and mana through her horn, she left the waking world behind.
She was swimming through a sea of stars once again. It was just as beautiful and mystifying as always, but there would be time to lose herself in it later. Right now, she had something more meaningful to do.
Sweetie closed her eyes, took a deep breath, centered herself, and pulled from her heart and her soul to create a space of her own.
Her landing was as graceful as any she had seen from Luna this time, and when she opened her eyes she was not on a beach. Instead, she was in a cozy home, picture frames lining all of the shelves and tables, and nearly every bit of wall space. A fire gently crackled in the fireplace, and the room smelled of spice, ink, and lavender.
An examination of the picture frames showed two different types. The first type housed memories of important moments in her life with all of the ponies she cared about most.
Her first kiss with Apple Bloom, and the one beside it, her first kiss with Scootaloo. The moment she accomplished casting a complex spell for the first time with Twilight looking on proudly. Having a mare’s night out with Rarity, both of them laughing as they shared personal stories that they only would with each other. Standing on that mystic balcony with Luna, her wing wrapped around her as they gazed at the two night skies before them. And many, many more besides those, too many to go through in one cursory walk around the room.
The second type were blank, but they shone with the same iridescent gleam of dream bubbles, and Sweetie smiled. This abstraction of them felt right, in a way the bubbles never truly had, and one day, they would contain images as well.
Sweetie Belle took in the totality of this space, and felt truly proud of herself. All of her doubts, all of her worries, they were still there, lurking in the dark corners of the room, hidden within drawers. Maybe they would be for the rest of her life. But despite them, and despite whatever pride and ego she had, they did not take away from the beauty here, instead merely adding to its complexity. She had found her balance.
The door opened with a creak, and Sweetie Belle looked over as Luna stepped in. She smiled at her mentor.
“Welcome to my dream space, Princess. What do you think of it?”
Luna smiled back. “I am honored to be here, and I think it is wonderful. Perfectly fitting for a mare like you.” A few tears collected at the corners of her eyes. “I knew that you could do it.”
Whatever pride she had felt in herself paled in comparison to hearing those words from the mare before her. Sweetie ran to her mentor and embraced her, tears of sadness and joy and unnameable emotions in between flowing freely down her cheeks.
She wasn’t perfect, and neither was Luna, or anyone else for that matter. But she had done what she could, she had accomplished something special, made something unique to herself, and that was enough.
Luna returned the hug, and Sweetie Belle felt at peace.