The One Where You Reacquaint Yourself With the Dragon Lord

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When you first found yourself stranded in Equestria, you wouldn’t have dared step foot anywhere near the Dragon Lands. Not after you’d heard the tales from Princess Twilight and her friend Rarity. They had gone there years ago to help their friend Spike and were lucky to return unscathed after an encounter with a dragon named Garble and his friends.

Now, almost six years after they had traveled there, you found yourself returning to the Dragon Lands for the second time in about four months. Your first trip there had come only because Spike had begged you. You considered the little dragon to be your only ‘bro’ in this world. As a guy, he understood you, and you understood him. It was that understanding that had led to you accompanying him on his trip, and you were glad you did. He had run into some trouble with Garble yet again, but he actually had a dragon on his side that time around: Ember.

She was… different, as far as you had been able to tell. Not only was she considerably nicer than the other dragons, though she still had an attitude about her, she was also much smaller, just barely a head taller than yourself. Of course, she was still a fire-breathing reptile that could fly, so you hadn’t exactly felt safe when she first discovered you, Rarity, and Twilight. What she ended up saying about you stuck with you, though. She had called you “quite the exotic creature”.

Whether that was a compliment or not, you had no clue. What you did know was that she had become quite the leader. Which brings you to your current situation. “Spike, are you sure she’ll be fine with me coming along?”

“Well, to be honest, I’m not really sure,” your friend shrugs. That worries you a bit, and he notices. “Don’t sweat it though, we’ll just tell her I didn’t want to travel there alone.”

That makes enough sense that you don’t push the subject any further. Though, an odd question does come to the forefront of your mind as you near the edge of the Dragon Lands. “So why does she call herself the Dragon Lord, and not the Dragon Lady?”

Spike chuckles at that, and shrugs his shoulders again. “No clue, bro. Maybe they think ‘Lord’ sounds scarier?”

The idea of anyone finding someone like Ember scary amuses you. Sure, she can breathe fire and claw the hell out of you, but your impression of her had left you thinking that she wanted to learn what it was like to be friends with others, rather than harm them. You’re lifted away from your thoughts as you notice the heat, and you turn to Spike. “Maybe. I forgot how hot it was here, though.”

“Well it is a volcanic area,” he says matter-of-factly, and you stick your tongue out at him. You had been to Yellowstone a couple times before you got stuck here, but you had never endured heat like this while you were there. But hey, it was still better than the freezing cold Crystal Empire.

“So why did Ember call you here, Spike?”

“I dunno, I just woke up this morning and I was glowing.”

“And itchy,” you add, laughing a bit as he scratches his back when he hears your comment. “Maybe she just wants to chat or something?”

“Well I wish she would have just written me a letter then,” Spike replies, scratching at his arms as you walk past a group of larger dragons. You aren’t familiar with any of them, but the largest one steps directly in your path, making you and Spike stop in your tracks. He’s a huge, pure black dragon. Normally, you’d find something like that incredibly intimidating, but he was shooting the two of you a crooked grin for some reason.

“So you’re Spike, huh?” He asks, looking towards your tiny companion. Spike laughs nervously, and nods his head as he reels back a bit, bracing himself for trouble. That trouble never came, luckily, and the dragon simply claps his hand onto Spike shoulder. “Hah, he looks pretty scared, guys,” he calls back to his friends, who snicker. “No sweat, bro, we’ve been dying to meet the dragon that finished the Gauntlet of Fire.”

“Oh, heh, well that’s me!” Spike grins, pointing a thumb at himself.

“Great, now he’s never gonna shut up about it…” you mutter jokingly. The other dragons laugh at that, and the one in front of you turns to face you.

“So what are you supposed to be, some kinda hairless gorilla?”

“I’m a human,” you beam. “The only one on the planet!”

“Man, and you thought I’d get an ego,” Spike mutters.

“Ya don’t say?” The dragon leans towards you, inspecting you closely. “What are those things on your body?”

“Um. Clothes?”

“Yeah, what do they do?” He asks, tugging a bit on the right sleeve of your shirt. You brush his claws away, not wanting him to rip it. “They’re not strong like armor.”

“They keep me warm,” you reply. “Plus, humans can’t exactly hide their pieces,” you add, pointing towards your crotch for emphasis, “and it wouldn’t exactly be decent to walk around showing off my genitals.”

He stares at you for a moment, then busts out laughing. “Hah, you’re alright, man! I’ll get out of your way now, I can tell that Spike is really anxious to see the Dragon Lord,” he chuckles. Your attention is drawn back to your friend, and he’s practically rolling around on the ground in an attempt to get rid of an itch. “The name’s Pyre, by the way.”

You tell Pyre your name, and shake hands with him. After that, he goes back over to his friends, and you direct your attention back to Spike, walking over and standing above him. “Need some help there?”

“Yeah, that’d be great,” he replies, scratching himself all over. Luckily, the walk to Ember’s throne room isn’t too far, so you toss him over your shoulder and begin the trek there. You don’t run into many more dragons, and the ones that you do run into are just as friendly as Pyre was, thank god. Of course, the fact that you were holding a writhing, pulsating dragon that had been summoned to these lands basically meant you were escorting a VIP.

Thankfully, your journey came to an end after about five more minutes. Your forehead was practically caked in sweat, and your shirt was beginning to grow damp as well. You walk through the dark entrance to Ember’s lair, and are shocked to see that the inside is incredibly bright, no doubt a result of all the gems that adorn the walls and ceiling. Sapphires, rubies, emeralds, topaz, even a few diamonds! In fact, the only place that seems to be lacking any gems is the far ends of the room, which is shrouded in darkness.

“Heh, I guess she really likes gems,” you joke to yourself. Unbeknownst to you, you’re not alone, and a reply echoes throughout the cave.

“Gems are exotic minerals.” You look all around for the source of the voice, but can’t see anything. The sound of a roaring fire pulls your gaze to the previously unlit area of the room, and you see that Ember is sitting in her throne, having just lit a torch. She looks exactly like you remembered her. Her scales were a gorgeous blue, and she had a few blue spikes poking out from her head. The most striking feature was her horns, though, which curled back and then forward, much like a ram’s. “Though I suspect your kind doesn’t look at them that way.”

“Actually, humans found gems just as precious as dragons do,” you inform her. She lets out a huff of air, perhaps out of disbelief, and rolls her eyes. Deciding that you don’t want to just stand around like a chump, you slowly begin to make your way towards her. Her tail slithers up the side of her throne, then smacks back to the floor as she regards you.

“I suspect that Spike is incapacitated?” You nod your head as you come to a stop no more than a meter in front of her, and she gives you a small smirk. “It’s a good thing he had a friend to escort him here, then.”

Ember moves to grab her scepter, and waves it in front of Spike. The glowing that’s encompassed his body for the past few hours finally begins to fade away, and he lets out a massive sigh of relief as you lower him to the ground. Once he’s back on his feet, he smiles. “Thanks for carrying me,” he says, then turns towards Ember. “So why did you call me here, Ember?”

Ember raises her head up, and looks down to him. “I have a request for you, Spike. One that you may find a bit… strange.”

“What is it?”

“I ask that you teach me more about friendship.” You have to stifle a laugh at her serious expression, which she catches onto. “And just what are you chuckling about?”

“Oh, just your face,” you reply… and immediately realize your mistake. She sends you a glare, and you reel back a bit. “Oh god, that’s not what I meant! I, uh—”

“Just do yourself a favor and keep your jaw closed unless I speak to you,” she practically growls, cutting you off. You nod your head insanely fast to appease her. She gives you a smile that you can see right through, and turns back to Spike. “The dragons here have no concept of friendship. At least, not in the same way your pony friends do.”

You zone out a bit as the two begin to chat, and decide to look around the room. Aside from the gems, there wasn’t anything too special about it. It was just an unsculpted cave with a stone chair that looked far too massive for Ember. Of course, you wouldn’t say that to her face, because she’d probably claw yours right off.

Your attention is grabbed again as you hear her say your name. “Huh?”

“I said,” she frowns, “would you like to join Spike and I for lunch?”

“Oh!” You look over to Spike, and he gives you a little thumbs up. You shoot him a grin, then turn back to Ember. “Sure.”

“Very good. Follow me,” she instructs the two of you. She flaps her wings, giving her enough lift to hover over to the wall directly to the right of her throne. To your surprise, she presses a hand down on it, and a tiny pressure plate is revealed. To the left of it, the wall rises up, and a new passageway becomes visible.

“Hey, that’s pretty cool,” Spike gushes. Ember doesn’t reply, giving the two of you a wayward glance as she takes off into the tunnel. “Well, looks like we’re walking, bro.”

“It would seem that way…” You sigh. “And here I was thinking we were done walking.”

At least you have your buddy to chat with, which passes the short time it takes to make it to the room Ember had relocated to. She’s already sitting at the end of a rather large table, and the two of you split up to opposite sides of the table. By the time you’re both sat at her sides, she’s already set up plates of…

“Uh, Ember?”

“What is it?” She asks, raising an eyebrow.

You point to the gems she’s put on your plate. “Do you have anything that won’t shred up my insides?”

She sighs, and heads off to what you can only assume is a kitchen. She returns shortly after, holding what looks like a huge t-bone steak in her hands. Where she got that, you have no idea, but you certainly aren’t gonna complain. She drops it onto your plate with a thud, and immediately ignites it with her breath. After about five seconds, she stops and sits back down in her seat, the steak fully cooked. “I assume you’re not opposed to eating beef?”

“Are you kidding me?!” You shout, stuffing your face with the glorious food. “Twilight and her friends never let me eat meat!”

Your actions get a giggle out of her, much to your shock. “Well I can’t say I’m surprised. Ponies are notorious for being one of the few species on the planet that don’t eat any kind of meat.”

“Well if they’re anything like the horses where I come from,” you speak with your mouth full, not caring at all how rude it is, “then they just can’t digest it as easily as they can vegetation.”

“Hm… interesting. So tell me, Spike.” She turns back to the little drake, whose mouth is just as stuffed with gems as yours is with steak. He somehow manages to gulp it all down, something you decide you’ll have to have him teach you. “How is Princess Twilight?”

“She’s doing great,” he beams. “Actually, she and the girls are off at the Crystal Empire right now.”

“Crystal Empire?” Ember asks. You swear you can see a bit of drool running down her mouth as she repeats the name.

“Yeah, it’s where Princess Cadance and Shining Armor rule over the Crystal Ponies. I don’t mean to brag, but I’m considered a national hero there,” he boasts, trying to act nonchalant and failing completely.

“Oh, don’t be so modest, Spike,” you speak up. “You definitely meant to brag.”

Spike blushes at that, but continues. “That’s why I brought him.”

“And he intrigues me,” Ember replies, turning back to you as she gulps down a few gems. “Tell me, do you remember what I said to you when we first met?”

“Um, I think so. You said that I was an ‘exotic creature’, right?”

“Yes, and my opinion has not changed. You’re more dragon than you are pony, so why do you choose to live with them?”

“Twilight was the first one to find me,” you recall. “I actually had no idea how I ended up here, but she was willing to help me find out.”

“And have you?”

You shake your head. “Not yet, but by this point it’s not really important.”

“What do you mean? Do you not have any family or friends that you miss?” She asks.

The question calls forward memories of your past life. It had been a happy one, but at the same time, you weren’t as upset as some people might have been.

“My family and friends were great, but I dunno,” you shrug. “I took it pretty hard at first, but I doubt they would want me to waste the rest of my life trying to find a way back home, even if they do wanna see me again. I’m sure they’d rather I just made the most of what I’ve been handed. After all, I have been here for three years”

“That’s certainly an optimistic way of looking at it.”

“Well, it also helps that I’ve got Spike by my side. He’s the best friend a guy could ask for.” You smile at him, and he returns it.

Ember doesn’t seem entirely satisfied, though. “So what happened after you were found?”

“Well, she wanted to study me,” you laugh at the memory. You’d never recoiled faster than you had when she’d tried to remove your clothes. Having to explain to her that humans wear clothes to remain decent was quite an embarrassing ordeal, especially when she kept asking questions. “After that, she helped me get a job at Rarity’s boutique.”

“Rarity…” Ember repeats, putting a claw to her chin. “Is she the white pony that journeyed here during the Gauntlet of Fire?”

“That’s her,” you nod. “I made enough money there to rent a house in Ponyville, so that’s where I live now.”

“I see. I may have to visit this ‘Ponyville’ one day, and visit with her and her friends,” she smiles. “But for now, I believe the two of you shall suffice.”

“So how come you wanna learn about friendship?”

“It was Spike’s friendship that helped me get to where I am today,” she responds, motioning to the scepter leaning against her chair. “And I believe that it could serve to help me grow as a leader.”

“Well you’re already a pretty great leader,” Spike comments. “I mean, not as great as my whole ‘Garble has to hug everyone’ rule. That one was classic!” He snorts with laughter. You’ve gotta agree with that. “What ever happened with that jerk anyways?”

“Shortly after you and your friends left, he attempted a coup with his friends,” she rolls her eyes. “It was rather unsuccessful, and father came up with a pretty severe punishment for me to hand down.”

“Heh, how severe are we talking?” Spike asks.

“He had to wear a tutu for three weeks,” she laughs, and the two of you immediately break into your own laughter.

“Okay, that is priceless. I had no idea your dad had such a great sense of humor,” you laugh, wiping away a few tears. After a few moments, the laughter begins to die down, and you look back over to Spike, who has finished off the last of his gems. You only have a few bites of steak left yourself, and it seems as if the two are waiting on you to finish. “Anyways, what do you wanna know about friendship?”

“Everything,” she replies, making you spit out your food in shock. “Is… something wrong?”

“N-no, nothing,” you reply, wiping your mouth off. “Um, does that mean we have to stay here for a while?”

“I have made arrangements for you to remain here for the next two weeks,” she answers, making you gulp. You weren’t sure if you could handle two whole weeks in the Dragon Lands. “You may leave if you wish, as I was only expecting Spike to come, anyways.”

You look over to Spike, who’s giving you that look. The kind that practically screams ‘you better not abandon me bro’. When he gives you that look, you’d feel like an asshole if you turned him down. You let out a sigh, and offer him a tiny smile. “It’s alright, I can’t leave my bro hanging.”

“Awesome!” He exclaims, pumping his fist in the air.

Ember chuckles at your camaraderie and flaps her wings, hovering back into the air. Taking hold of her scepter, she motions for you to follow her once more, and you and Spike shuffle out of your seats. You trail behind the dragoness for a few minutes before coming to a small room with nothing more than a stone bed in it. “This is where you will be staying.”

“This is the arrangement you had made?” You ask, scratching your head. Deciding that you wouldn’t be the one to sleep on the floor, you turn and look down at Spike. Extending your hands towards him, you smirk. “Alright bro. Rock, paper, scissors for who has to sleep on the floor.”

“You’re on!” He grins. The two of your go through the motions, and each throw out a hand after chanting the name of the game. To your dismay, he’s thrown out scissors while you threw out paper. Silently cursing, you turn back to Ember.

“Are you sure you don’t have something a little more, um, comfortable?”

“Sorry, but you clearly lost at that little game,” she smirks. “I’ll be leaving you two to get comfortable while I attend a meeting.”

“Yeah, whatever,” you grumble, not looking forward to throwing your back out. Ember says nothing more, leaving the two of you alone, and you sit down on the rock bed. “So if we’re gonna be staying here, we should probably send a letter to Twilight soon.”

“I’ll ask Ember for some paper when she gets back.”

“Aw, crap,” you mutter, having just realized something. “This is going to cut into my vacation days at the Boutique…”

The One Where You Read a Book

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“I wonder when Ember is gonna be back,” you sigh, your feet swinging back and forth off the edge of the bed. It had been nearly an hour since she’d left, or at least, you were pretty sure it had been. Clocks didn’t seem to be a thing in the Dragon Lands, so you had absolutely no idea what time it even was.

“Hopefully soon, I’m starving,” Spike replies, making you raise your eyebrow.

“Dude, we ate like an hour ago.”

“Yeah, I know, but I wanted a second helping.” He blushes.

“Well then why didn’t you just ask?” You say, slapping a hand to your face in disappointment.

“I didn’t wanna be rude. After all, we are her guests.”

“Yeah, well if you ever tell the others that I ate beef, I’ll—”

“Am I interrupting something?”

That voice makes you scream for joy inwardly, and you turn to the doorway with a smile. That smile quickly fades as you take in Ember’s appearance, though. She looks absolutely exhausted, as if she’d gone a few days without sleep. What the hell had happened at her meeting?

“N-no. How did your meeting go, Ember?”

“Well,” she replies. “Though I did not expect it to go on as long as it did.”

“Heh, that’s meetings for you. There’s always something that makes them last longer.”

“Especially if Twilight is your boss,” Spike comments, making you laugh. Ember tilts her head.

“I don’t understand.”

“He means that Twilight is always finding work to do,” you explain. “She’s a huge nerd, basically.”

“Ah, I see. Well, I was thinking that you two could help teach me about friendship now.” The two of you quickly shuffle to your feet. She smiles at that. “You two seem anxious to leave this room.”

“Hell yeah!” You shout, ready to finally go somewhere else. Spike seems to share your sentiments, but you cut him off. “Please tell me the room we’re going to isn’t made entirely out of rocks…”

Ember chuckles at that, and motions for the two of you to follow her. It’s only as you take a good look at the hallway you’re in that you realize just how large this place is. The throne room must have had several more secret passageways in it, because you could see numerous hallways connected to the one you’re in. You follow Ember’s lead and take a left down one of those hallways, and come to a large wooden door. “This room is our secret study,” she explains, pushing the door open.

To your absolute disbelief, the room is made almost entirely out of wood. There are a few wicker chairs in the center around a coffee table, and the walls are completely lined with books, some of which you recognize from Twilight’s library back home. “But I thought dragons didn’t care about being smart?”

“Father might not, but I had this built after I became Dragon Lord.” You watch as she walks to the nearest bookshelf and grabs a rather large novel. The name on the spine seems awfully familiar to you. “This is my favorite book so far.”

“Wait a sec, can I see that?” You hold your hand out, and she gives you the book. “‘Nineteen Neighty-Four’...” You mutter out the name, then look back up to Ember. “Are you freaking kidding me?”

Ember puts her hands on her hips and turns her nose up at you. “Hmph, well if you don’t like it, then just give it back.”

“No, that’s not it at all. I love this book,” you smile, hugging the book close. “Do you mind if I borrow it to read?”

“As long as you stay in here while you do. But you so much as scuff that book, and I’ll claw your eyes out,” she warns you, poking her claws out at you for emphasis. You take the warning, and make your way over to one of the chairs she has set up.

“Hey, do you have any blank scrolls?” You hear Spike ask Ember, and she leads him to the other side of the room. While they’re off presumably writing a letter to Twilight, you open up the book and begin reading. To your astonishment, it’s almost a word for word copy of the one from back home, aside from the humans being changed to ponies. As you begin to read, the world around you is zoned out, and you lose yourself in the dystopian world.

You aren’t sure how long you’ve been reading the book, but the sound of a platter being dropped on the coffee table freaks you out enough to make you throw the book up in the air. You manage to catch it before it falls onto the mugs of coffee she’d brought, and Ember gives you a glare as she sits down next to you, running her index claw up and down the arm of the wicker chair. “It’s a good thing you caught that.”

You chuckle nervously, rubbing the back of your head. “Heh, you’re not really gonna claw my eyes out, are you?”

You feel Spike take a seat to your left, leaving you in between two dragons, and you gulp. “I guess you won’t know until you mess up,” she replies, smirking.

“So why did you decide to have a study built?” You ask, attempting to change the subject. Luckily, she takes the bait, and takes a sip of the coffee she’d prepared before replying. You decide to grab a cup, and take a sip as well. It’s good, and you drink a bit more as she begins speaking.

“I felt that, in order to better understand ponies, I should try to surround myself with their knowledge,” she speaks slowly, looking around the study as she does. You take the opportunity to shove your nose back into the book you’d been reading. “Plus, learning about the history of Equestria has been pretty cool.”

“Heh, you should see how many books Twilight has in her library,” Spike pipes up. “And she used to make me reorganize them every single morning.”

Ember raises an eyebrow at that. “She forced you to reorganize her library for her? Why not do it herself?”

“She helped,” you say, not looking up from your book. “Spike likes to leave that fact out when he talks to girls he likes.”

Spike punches your arm playfully at that, and you snicker as you rub where he’d hit you. Ember, though, is blushing and says, “O-oh, I see.”

‘Crap,’ you think, ‘Now she’s all embarrassed…’

“He’s just messing around,” Spike says, catching on to it as well. Hopefully he knows how to use tact so he doesn’t piss her off. “I like you as a friend, but that’s it.”

Ember clears her throat, doing her best to regain her composure. Her tail slithers up and smacks back down against the floor, and you can tell that she’s having trouble getting out words, so you decide to help her. “So Ember, tell me, what do you like to do for fun?”

She takes a moment, but says, “Hunt.”

“Hunt for…?” Spike asks, leaning forward along with you as you await her answer. She mutters something, but neither of you can discern what it was, so you ask her to speak up.

“Birds, alright?! I hunt birds!” She yells, her face turning red. Your sudden laughter confuses her, and she leans towards you. “And just what are you laughing about? I’ll have you know that birds are a formidable enemy!”

“Humans hunt birds too, Ember,” you reply, and she seems to calm down a bit. “You done freaking out?” You ask, and she nods reluctantly. “Humans eat bird all the time.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, but I’m surprised you guys do, to be honest. Spike, have you ever eaten meat?” You ask, turning to him. He shakes his head.

“No, but most griffons and dragons do. I was raised by Twilight and Princess Celestia, and ponies don’t eat meat.”

“That makes sense,” Ember says. “But actually, most dragons prefer to eat beef. I’m one of the few that likes poultry more. Father says it’s a sign of weakness, but what does he know? I’m the Dragon Lord now,” she smirks.

“I don’t really care what I eat as long as it tastes good and doesn’t kill me,” you chuckle. “Though you might want to keep the fact that you eat meat on the down-low if you’re ever in Equestria.”

“Yeah, probably,” Spike cuts in. “Especially in Ponyville. I swear, those ponies will freak out over the smallest thing. But hey, it wouldn’t be Ponyville without a little chaos now and then.” He was definitely right. All you had to do was think back to the story they’d told you about when bunnies stampeded through the town, and the townsfolk all ran away in terror, to know that overreacting was a common occurrence there. Heck, there had been times where ponies had taken shelter in your home from just a little bit of rain.

“I’m sure I can handle just eating some gems if I ever visit there,” Ember grumbles. “What, do you think I don’t have any restraint?”

“It’s not so much we don’t think you have self-control as you’re a fire-breathing dragon. I don’t think ponies are big on that, are they Spike?” His answer is a snort of laughter, which tells both of you all you need to know. “Exactly.”

“Part of befriending someone is making compromises with them,” Spike adds, and you nod. “If you promise not to act mean, like you have been with him,” he points to you, “then they’ll be more accepting of you.”

“Even of my meat-eating?” She asks.

You sigh. “I’m sure that they’ll be fine with it as long as you don’t do it in front of them,” you say. “When Twilight found out humans were omnivores, she didn’t make too big a deal out of it.”

“I see. What do ponies eat, if not meat or gems?”

“Plants,” you and Spike say at the same time. Her face blanches at that, and the two of you snicker. “They’re not that bad,” you say, but her expression doesn’t seem to change.

“You mean to tell me you eat vegetation? That is absolutely disgusting…”

“Ponies think the same of eating meat,” Spike counters. “‘Sides, it’s not like you have to eat them.”

“What else do friends do?” she asks, quite clearly trying to change the subject. She looks like she’s about to puke, and you feel bad for laughing about it, but not bad enough to stop.

“Friends make fun of their friends,” you say, leaning towards Spike. The drake lifts up a hand and you give him a high-five. “Nah, but friends do poke fun at each other once in a while,” you say, leaning back in your chair and putting your book down on your lap. “Speaking of, what kind of dragon drinks coffee?”

“The kind that likes to feel energized,” she replies, seemingly calmed down. Suddenly, though, she pounds her fist against the arm of her chair. “Gah! Why is learning about friendship so difficult?”

“Well you can’t exactly learn it in five minutes,” Spike deadpans. “You just need to find someone you’re willing to look out for, and that would look out for you.”

“Well then that rules out him,” she says, pointing at you.

“Hey, I’ll have you know that I—”

“I guess that just leaves you,” she says to Spike, cutting you off. You grumble a bit, but decide to just let the two converse. “You were willing to die to help your friends, and to help me.”

“Well, yeah,” he blushes, rubbing the back of his head. “I just thought it was the right thing to do. Besides, you did the same for me.”

“Huh, I guess I did. Does that makes us friends?”

Spike titters. “Of course! The fact that you called me here to teach you about friendship should answer that question,” he says matter-of-factly. “And I do wanna help you.”

“Speaking of that, how’s Starlight?” You ask, turning back to Spike. You hadn’t heard from the unicorn in a while, and you were curious how her redemption was going. Twilight seemed to have high hopes for the former villain, but you had been far less willing to trust her after seeing what she’d done to her village.

“She’s great,” Spike replies, which was good; at least she wasn’t causing trouble anymore. “Twilight thinks she’ll be ready to go off on her own soon.”

You blow a bit of air out of your nose at that one. The very idea of the pony who had altered the timestream just to cheat her way to victory being accepted so readily is laughable. Still, this world seems to be a lot happier than your own, so something that crazy didn’t sound, well, crazy. “If you ask me, I think she still has a lot to learn.”

“Excuse me, but who is Starlight?” Ember asks. You let out a sigh.

“Damn it,” you curse, hating having to explain stuff like this. You decide to condense it, and hope for the best. “Alright, she’s this unicorn that tricked a bunch of ponies into following her every command. She stole their cutie marks, and if it wasn’t for Fluttershy, she would have done the same to our friends.”

“That sounds terrible…” she mutters. “I don’t know much about ponies, but I know that their cutie marks make them who they are.”

“It was. She was a horrible leader, but…” You think back to what Twilight had told you on numerous occasions. “I suppose anybody can change, given the right motivation.”

“Many of my dragon kin believe that I’m not fit to be a leader,” Ember responds. “They believe that a leader has to be tough and fearsome, but I can be those!”

“I dunno, you are pretty cute for a dragon,” you reply.

Her eyes go wide, she blushes, and you know exactly what’s coming. “S-shut up, I am not cute! I’m the Lord of all dragons!” She shouts, banging her scepter against the ground a bunch as she does. The whole display only serves to reinforce the fact that she’s cute, but you decide to just let her have this one.

“Fine, you’re the most fearsome dragon I know,” you say, your voice dripping with sarcasm. You hear her yell at you some more, but you tune her out as you pick your book back up, open it, and lean back in your chair. You begin to read where you’d left off, chuckling at how easy it was to upset her. She definitely isn’t going to learn how to take friendly barbs quickly, that much you’re sure of. After a few seconds, your thoughts are consumed by the book you’re reading.

‘Oh, 1984, I love you...

The One Where You Discuss Various Bits of History

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Once Ember notices you are no longer paying her any attention, she turns hers towards Spike. Most of their conversation is about the intricacies of friendship, but then they start talking about dragons. Turns out Spike knew shockingly little about his own heritage, so it looks like Ember is about to give him a rundown. Deciding that this might be worth your time as well, you place the book on the coffee table.

“So how long does it take for a dragon’s wings to come in?” That is actually a good question, one you’d been aching to know the answer to since you’d met Spike. The fact that the dragon is as small as he is surprised you. Heck, you have yet to run into a dragon the size of the ones from the movies you used to watch. Well, aside from Ember’s dad.

“Why do you ask, Spike?”

“Well, this one time, I went out of control hoarding stuff and grew really huge,” he pauses for a moment, which you take to imagine him being as big as Torch. The mere thought is hilarious, but the actual events had probably been pretty sketchy. “Rarity ended up breaking me out of the hoarding, but I still never grew any wings.”

“Hm.” Ember puts a claw to her chin in thought. “Very few dragons have fallen prey to the curse of hoarding, and those who have were already pretty big.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” You butt in. Spike seems curious as well.

“What I mean is that the growth of a dragon’s wings may have to do with their age, and not their metabolism,” she explains. You sort of understand, but beckon for her to continue. “It doesn’t matter how big a dragon is, because sprouting wings is a matter of how old you are.”

“Huh, I guess that makes sense. How long ago did you start growing yours?” Spike asks. You’re curious about that as well. You actually had no clue how old Ember was, but you knew that Spike was around fifteen now. The lack of growth in him may have been a result of his metabolism not growing out of control due to greed, but you find it more likely that dragons simple age very slowly.

“My wings grew out about two years ago, around the time I turned nineteen.” Ah, so she’s twenty-one then. “But it varies from dragon to dragon.”

“How old were Garble and his friends?” You ask. They looked a lot older than Ember and Spike, that much was for sure, but that could also just be their metabolism. Honestly, this conversation had only served to further confuse you on dragon physiology thus far.

“Garble is actually older than me, but I’m not really sure how much,” she replies. “Between you and me, I know why he’s such a jerk to everyone.”

“Why’s that?” Spike asks.

“He’s what the dragons referred to as a bareback for the longest time, because his wings grew in really late.” Okay, that is something you’ll need to remember to bring up next time you see him. “He’s also a, uh…” Ember mumbles out the rest, and you and Spike lean closer to her.

“He’s a what now?” You asks. You’re sure it’s something juicy as hell, since she’s reluctant to say it.

“He hasn’t… you know.” It takes you a second, but then it dawns on you, and your eyes widen as a smirk grows on your face.

“Oh. Oh!”

“What? What is he?” Spike asks. You’re not sure whether you should tell him, because you really don’t want Twilight to find out. The look on his face makes up your mind, though.

“He’s never had sex, Spike.” You expect Spike to blush at that, but he surprises you by falling out of his chair and rolling around on the floor, laughing his butt off. You turn back to Ember while he does, smirking. “Why’s that such a big deal with dragons?”

“It’s seen as some kind of status booster,” she shrugs. Ah, you had known some guys during your time in school that had thought of it that way, but you’d never cared much about it yourself. “Personally, I don’t understand it.”

Spike seems to have calmed down his laughter and hops back into his chair, scooting it closer to the two of you. “I’ll have to remember that, but what else can you tell me about dragons?”

Ember offers Spike a warm smile. “Did you know that not all dragons breathe fire?”

Spike’s eyes go wide at that, and you listen with interest. “Really?”

Ember nods. “Mhm. Lots of dragons in the Northern and Southern areas of the planet live in cold places.”

“Lemme guess, they have frost breath?” You ask, and she nods again. “How come none of those dragons came here when your father sent for everyone?”

“Would you like the full history lesson?” She sighs.

This could be a cool chance at learning some more history of the planet, but you can also tell she doesn’t really wanna explain everything right now. Fortunately, it looks like Spike wants to hear about it, so you decide to make a compromise with her. “How about an abridged version?”

“Alright, that’s fine,” she replies. You and Spike look giddily at one another, then back to her as she begins talking. “Thousands of years ago, before ponies even inhabited the planet, the dragons were the dominant creatures.

“The leader of the dragons was Brimstone for a lot of those years. Once some other species started popping up, Brimstone wanted to attack all of them so that dragons would be not just the dominant creatures, but the only creatures on the planet. Some dragons liked that idea, but—”

“What do you think of it?” You interrupt, curious.

She raises an eyebrow at you, as if the answer is obvious. “I think it’s a stupid idea, obviously, or you wouldn’t be alive, you idiot.”

“Oh, she got you!” Spike laughs. Yeah, you had kinda walked into that one, damn it. “Keep going, Ember!”

“... But there were other dragons that knew that it was a terrible idea. If you destroyed every species but the dragons, then they would have to eat just gems for the rest of time, and the dissenting dragons brought up a good point. What would happen when the planet’s supply of gems ran dry?

“Those dragons ended up rebelling against Brimstone, but their revolt wasn’t successful, and a lot of them died,” she pauses, looking a bit sad at that. You’re about to say something when it looks like she’s regained her composure. “Anyways, one of the dragons, named Gelid, led the rebellious dragons to the Southern ice caps.

“Brimstone cut them off from all other dragons, and it’s remained that way ever since. So whenever the appointed Fire Lord summons any dragons, those dragons are left out,” she finishes explaining.

You have a few questions, though. “Why not go find them?”

“The areas they live in are too harsh for normal dragons to go to,” she answers. “We’ve tried to send parties to find them in the past, but we’ve never been successful.”

“Yeah, remember how cold you were in the Crystal Empire, Spike?” The young drake nods. “Well the polar caps would be like five times as cold, especially at night.”

“Whoa, and there are dragons that live there? That’s pretty impressive.” He looks awestruck, and you almost feel bad that he’ll likely never meet any of the dragons Ember was talking about. “What else can you tell me?”

Ember leans back in her chair, and her tail slithers around a bit as she thinks. You’re enjoying learning a bit about dragons, and Spike has looked ecstatic as he’s listened to Ember. No doubt he was going to relay all of this information to Twilight, who was then going to write numerous notes about it. “Why are you so much smaller than your dad?” You ask.

That seems to catch her off-guard, and she glares at you. “I’ll have you know that I’m still a young dragon.”

“Aren’t you twenty-one?”

“Dragons age differently, you idiot!” she exclaims, and you chuckle as you try to calm her down to no avail. “My father is over three hundred years old, for your information!”

“Wow, dragons really live for that long?” Spike asks, wide-eyed.

Ember pinches the bridge of her nose in frustration, but manages to give Spike a smile and a nod after a moment. “My father isn’t even that old. Some dragons live to be thousands of years old.”

“What are the age groups like?” You ask.

“When a dragon is born, they’re referred to as a ‘wyrmling’,” she explains. “A wyrmling is equivalent to what ponies call ‘foals’.” She pauses for a moment to take a sip of her coffee. As she does, you’re reminded that she brought you a cup as well, and you take a sip as she continues.

“After about five years, a wyrmling begins to go through some changes. Their spinal column grows out, and their claws begin to separate.”

“I don’t remember that happening,” Spike comments, looking over his hands.

“Most dragons remember very little about their time as a wyrmling. Anyways, for the next ten years, a dragon doesn’t grow much, if at all. You might notice that Spike hasn’t grown at all since you’ve met him?” She guesses. She’s right, of course. The little guy was the same size he was the day you first saw him. “After that stage, another growth spurt occurs. Dragons get taller, and they begin to, uh…” She pauses, blushing, but manages to spit out, “sexually mature.”

“So are you sexually mature?” Spike asks bluntly, and you immediately laugh.

Ember slowly nods, which doesn’t surprise you, but there’s one thing you’re curious about now. “How do you know?”

“What?” She looks confused, as if your question had an obvious answer.

“How do you know you’re sexually maturing?” You repeat.

“I don’t know, you just kind of know,” she answers, shifting uncomfortably. Screw it, that answer was fair enough, and she clearly didn’t want to talk about it anyways.

“Ah. Human females know because their body starts to expel eggs. They get cramps, bleed a bit, it’s pretty gross.”

“That sounds… unpleasant,” she replies, her face blanching.

“Yeah, trust me, they let the guys know that it is,” you chuckle. You couldn’t exactly blame them for it either. No other mammals on Earth had periods, so it was definitely unfair. “You can continue, sorry.”

She smiles graciously, and does just that. “It’s during that time that a dragon typically tries to find a mate. Other species seem to think dragons will mate with anyone, but that’s not always true.”

“Do you have one?” Spike asks.

She shakes her head, which isn’t very shocking. With how uncomfortable she was talking about sexual stuff, she was definitely pretty innocent. “I don’t really have any interest in letting a dragon touch me like that. Male dragons aren’t very, um, gentle.”

“Shocker,” you reply sarcastically. “This may sound wrong, but why can’t you see a dragon’s… you know. Junk?” Your term seems to be lost on the Dragon Lord, and she blinks a bit. Alright, it looks like you’ll have to just take after Spike and be blunt about it. “I’ve seen you walk around, and I’ve never noticed your genitals.”

Her whole face lights up red at that. “And just what are you doing trying to look at my genitalia, you freak?!”

Spike snickers and leans towards you as Ember fumes. “You woke the beast, man.”

“It’s not just you,” you defend yourself. “It’s the same with all dragons, I was just wondering.”

“If you must know… you pervert,” she adds under her breath, “they’re concealed under our underbelly unless we grow aroused.”

“Hey, man,” you reply, “I’m just curious about dragon physiology. You’re only flattering yourself if you actually think I wanna see your freaky reptile bits.” You give her a smug look, and she’s about to shoot back a reply when Spike interrupts both of you.

“You still haven’t finished explaining how dragons age, Ember.”

She lets out a sigh and sticks her tongue out at you. “You got lucky this time.” Taking a moment to recompose herself, she picks right back up where she’d left off earlier. “It’s during this stage that most dragons begin to sprout their wings. There are a few exceptions—”

“Like Garble,” you recall.

“Like Garble. The next age group is when a dragon starts to grow to the size that Garble and his friends are,” she continues. “From then on, dragons begin to age at a slower and slower rate.”

“That’s pretty cool,” Spike comments. “Does that mean I’ll live for thousands of years?”

“As long as nothing kills you, yes.”

“Well hopefully I can avoid that,” he smiles. “But that does mean I’ll outlive Twilight…” He sounds a tad morose, and you frown.

“Yeah, but you’ll get to make all new friends,” you attempt to comfort him. “‘Sides, you shouldn’t focus on the future, you gotta live in the moment.”

“How long do ponies live for?” Ember asks. You actually aren’t too certain yourself, and it doesn’t look like Spike is either. You knew Granny Smith was probably around a hundred years old, which absolutely decimated the age limits of equines on Earth, and nobody ever talked as if she was close to dying any time soon.

“Well, I know one pony that’s around a hundred years old, but that’s it. Celestia and Luna have been around for thousands of years, though.”

“Interesting. I thought dragons were the only creatures capable of living for such a long time?”

“Well, they’re alicorns,” Spike says.

Ember raises an eyebrow at that. “Alicorns?”

“You’ve never heard of alicorns?” You ask, kinda surprised. You would think that over the thousands of years that Celestia and Luna had ruled, the dragons would have known about them. Of course, she was also a pretty young dragon, and she had said herself that many dragons had no interest in learning. “Not even from any of these books?” She shakes her head, and you look to Spike. “You wanna explain or should I?”

“You’ve got it,” he chuckles. “You’re more like Twilight than I am.”

Well he has you there. You had done your best to learn about Equestria during the three years you’d been here, and even Twilight herself was surprised at the amount of knowledge you’d retained up to this point. You turn back to Ember, and begin to explain. “Okay. I assume you know about the basic pony species, right?”

“You mean earth ponies, unicorns, and pegasi?”

Well at least you wouldn’t have to explain those to her. “Right. Well, as far to my knowledge, an alicorn is something of a combination of all three, but with a few enhancements.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, everyone knows that the main attribute of a pegasus pony is its wings that give it the ability to fly. Unlike dragons, pegasi are born with their wings.”

“I see. Are they able to fly as foals?” She asks, and you nod. “That’s gotta be a strange sight.”

You think back to watching Pound Cake fly around, and she’s definitely right. It’s both strange and hilarious, though. “Then you have unicorns, who have the ability to perform magic.” You pause, assuming she’s going to ask a question, but she doesn’t. “Then there are the earth ponies, who are more physically gifted than the other two.”

“And where do alicorns fit in this?”

“Alicorns are basically a better version of all three species mashed together into one pony. They have bigger wings, larger horns, and are generally larger than most ponies. They also have a much higher capacity for magic.”

“How much higher?”

“Well, Celestia moves the Sun itself with her magic, and Luna does the same with the moon, so I’d say so much higher that you can’t put a number to it.”

Ember’s eyes go wide at that, and she reels back a bit in her chair. “Th-that’s impossible!”

“That’s what I thought,” you reply, “until I saw Celestia raise it myself.” Her jaw drops at the very idea, and you titter. “Guess it’s a good thing Garble didn’t get the scepter, right?”

“What do you mean?” She asks.

Spike gives a surprised look at that, and asks what you were about to. “Wait, you mean you don’t know what he was planning?”

She shakes her head. “My only extended interaction with him was our fight in the cave.” That was true, which meant she had never heard him when the announcement was made that the winner would be crowned the new Dragon Lord.

“He wanted to attack Equestria.”

“He… did?” She looks downtrodden at that, her head drooping slightly. “I had no idea, and my selfishness almost let him do just that…”

“Hey, it’s fine,” you smile. “The important thing is that he wasn’t able to do it.”

“If he had, and what you’re saying about Princesses Celestia and Luna is true, then he would have led us all to ruin.”

“Yeah, they would have put the smackdown on you guys for sure,” Spike giggles for a moment. You shoot him a glare and he stops abruptly. “Eh, hehe, sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Ember admits. “I see now why you care about your friends, Spike. They would never try to do something so… cowardly.”

Thinking back, there weren’t many times you could recall that even required Celestia and Luna to help out. Twilight and her friends had always managed to stop whatever threats came their way through the power of friendship, which was something you’d come to appreciate. But still, the fact that Celestia and Luna had been able to hold their own against Discord, and even defeat him, spoke bounds about the power they possessed. Of course, whether they had defeated him after a long battle, or simply caught him off-guard with the Elements of Harmony was a mystery that they’d likely never reveal.

“You cared enough about the safety of your home to risk your own life to save it. I can’t think of a single dragon that would do the same thing if they had the chance,” Ember goes on. “I’m glad to call you my friend.”

“I’m glad you’re mine, too,” Spike smiles happily. “But I can think of one. You.”

Ember tries to stammer out some excuse about how that isn’t true, but you aren’t having any of that. “Oh, come on, Ember, you fought off a dragon three times your size just to help save Spike. The other dragons might not think so, but that makes you a better candidate for leader than any of them could ever hope to be.”

She blushes a bit at your compliment, which you find adorable. “T-thank you…”

“Any time,” you smirk. After a moment, you get up from your seat and stretch your arms out with a yawn. “Well, I’m beat, long trip today. You mind if I just sleep in here?”

“In the study? But there’s not even a bed.”

“That’s true, but there is a rug, which is a lot more comfortable than stone.”

Ember thinks for a moment, then nods. “Alright, I guess you can if you want. C’mon, Spike, I’d like to hear more about your friends before I follow his lead and go to bed,” she says, getting up from her seat. You watch as the two walk towards the door, chatting the whole time, then fall back into your chair. If you were going to be spending two weeks here, then you’d at least spend the majority of that time in the study so you could read to pass the time.

Once you hear the door slam shut, you think back to a thought that had entered your mind just a few moments earlier. Had you really thought that Ember looked adorable? You try pass it off as an in-the-moment thing, and close your eyes as you attempt to fall asleep. She's a dragon, for christ’s sake. The thought eats away at you for a bit, but you manage to drift off after a while.

The One Where You Talk About... You Know

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As you wake from your slumber, you’re aware of something poking against your side. You reach out to brush whatever it is away, but reel back when you feel it. It’s sharp, and the feeling of it pricking your hand causes your eyes to snap open as well. Your vision takes a moment to clear up, but when it does, you look to your right. “Your tail is poking my side.”

Ember looks up from her book, but makes no move to shift her tail. “Looks like it.”

You roll your eyes, and move to grab it, this time being sure to avoid the tip of the tailfin. With a little nudge, her tail flops to the floor and you fold your arm back over your belly. You force your eyes shut, but it’s useless at this point. The pain her tail had caused to your hand was lingering, and your eyes open back up after a few moments. “That hurt, you know…”

The dragoness just shrugs. “It was your fault, not mine.”

“Well you were the one poking your tail into my side,” you argue, shifting yourself to sit up in your chair. You let out a yawn as you stretch your arms outwards.

“Well you were the one who just grabbed at it without looking first, idiot,” Ember retorts. Well shit, she pretty much had you there. You decide to take this moment to look around the study for Spike, but you don’t see any trace of him. “If you’re looking for Spike,” she guesses correctly, shifting her focus back to her book, “he insisted on sleeping in.”

“Heh, what a shocker.” That didn’t surprise you. Twilight always made the poor guy wake up at ungodly times. You were honestly surprised whenever he didn’t have massive bags under his eyes. “So what brings you here?”

“I am reading, if that wasn’t blatantly obvious,” she replies coldly. You ignore that, and look at the cover of the book. When your eyes finally manage to adjust to reading it sideways, you recite it aloud.

“‘Equine Dating Habits’?” You chuckle. “Why on Earth would you care about that?”

“If you must know,” Ember turns her nose up at you, “our conversation last night piqued my interest.”

You look at the book again. It looks as if she’s already about forty or fifty pages in, which seems to be about a fourth of the book overall. “So I’m guessing you’ve already read about the cheesier aspects of their dating rituals?”

Ember doesn’t directly answer your question, instead asking a question of her own. One that you can’t help but laugh at. “Is it true that the mares eat the flowers they’re offered?”

“Some of them do, but not all of them.” You chuckle at the thought of a girl doing that back home. You’re almost certain that any guy who saw that happen would take off faster than a speeding bullet. “I actually had a question for you, though.”

“Then ask it,” Ember replies, moving her attention back to her book. “Unless you humans are incapable of performing such menial tasks.”

You ignore that little barb, which is probably for the best. “How do dragons court each other?”

“Hm?” The Dragon Lord hums, “What do you mean?”

“You know. Ponies give each other flowers and get married and stuff. What do dragons do?” You ask, clarifying it for her. “I know you guys don’t exactly believe in ‘love’, but you’ve gotta have some way of figuring out who you want to… you know, with.”

Ember gently places the book down on the table, and turns to you with a smirk. You swear you can hear a slightly chuckle escape her lips. “You want to know how we go about mating.”

“Yes, well…” You feel your cheeks heat up a bit, and your cross your arms over your chest as you avoid the dragoness’ gaze. “You don’t have to put it so bluntly, ya know.”

“What would you like to know about?” You hear her ask. “The process of earning another dragon’s affections, or the process of—”

“Okay!” You shout, thankfully cutting her off. You definitely didn’t need to be hearing about how dragons had sex, especially not from the fucking Dragon Lord. “I think just telling me how you guys find out who you like will be fine, thanks.”

Ember opens her mouth to reply, but shuts it just as quickly. Instead of replying right away, she grabs her book and flaps her wings, hovering up and over to the bookshelf and putting it back in its rightful spot. As she flies back, she finally seems to have an answer for you. “We don’t ‘like’ each other. When dragons choose their mate, it’s not out of love, it’s out of necessity,” she says, plopping down gently in her chair.

She stretches her wings a bit before finally retracting them against her sides. She turns her chair a bit so that she’s facing you, and continues. “Once a year, on the week of the Winter Solstice, the dragons enter into a mating ritual.”

“Kind of like when mares go into heat?” You ask for clarification. Ember nods, and you chuckle a bit. “Minus the bitchiness, hopefully.”

She raises an eyebrow at that. “What is ‘bitchiness’?”

Oh. Right. The creatures of this world don’t know about human curse words. “It’s just a word used in my world to describe someone with a foul attitude.”

“Ah,” Ember nods in understanding. You motion for her to go on and lean back a bit more in your chair. “Well, the ritual begins when the male dragons take their places on top of their rocks. They stretch their wings out as far as they can, and then the females go around to look for the best available dragon.”

“... That’s it?” You ask.

“Well… yeah,” she shrugs. “Like I said, it’s not about love or anything. The females just pick the males they think are the most attractive.”

“Man, the women in my world would have a field day if they heard that…” You mutter, just quiet enough so that Ember doesn’t pick up on it. Raising your voice a bit, you reply to her. “Have, uh, you, ever taken part in the ritual?”

Ember turns so red that you could almost mistake her for a female Garble. Oh god. Ew. No. Get that image outta your head, bro.

“N-no! Why would you even assume I have, I’m too young for children! Besides, I told you yesterday that I would never let a dragon touch me like that!”

Oh. Right. She had, hadn’t she? Whoops. “S-sorry, just trying to make conversation,” you reply weakly.

“Well think of a better topic than whether or not I’ve ever had a penis inside of me!” She shouts at you, her face red as a tomato. It’s actually kinda funny, but you’re not laughing. You don’t want to die today.

“O-okay,” you stammer out. “S-so, uh… how’s the weather been?”

Ember stares at you blankly, blinking a few times. Finally, after what seems like hours, she pinches the bridge of her nose. “... You’re an idiot.”

“Yeah, an idiot that you’re having fun talking to,” you shoot back. “Otherwise you would have left already.”

“Hmph, I just don’t want to upset Spike by maiming his ‘bro’,” she replies, sarcasm evident in her voice as she turns her nose up at you once again.

“Yeah, sure, keep on—” You’re cut off as the doors to the study open up, the drake in question walking in. He’s rubbing at his eyes, and lets out a yawn as he waves weakly at the two of you. “Morning, Spike. Tired?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” he replies, immediately making his way over towards the coffee machine. God, even his voice sounds like it was just awoken from a thousand year slumber. Hopefully some caffeine will fix that. “I couldn’t fall asleep on that stupid rock bed. It kept digging into my spines.”

“At least you didn’t wake up to a tail poking you in the side,” you grumble, earning a little jab in the arm from Ember’s elbow. “Hey, get me some coffee too, would ya?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Spike waves a hand nonchalantly, as if to say ‘no worries’. “So what have you two been up to?”

“Just talking,” you’re quick to reply, cutting off whatever Ember was planning on saying. Not that she seems to mind. Anything to avoid telling Spike just what you were talking about.

“Oh yeah. About what?” He asks a bit too sarcastically.

Fuck.

“Uh…”

You’re doomed. At least, until Ember suddenly decides to save the day. “We were just talking about… food.”

You can’t see Spike’s face as he goes to work making some coffee over by the bookshelves, but you’re fairly certain he just chuckled. “You two are terrible liars.”

… Shit.

“If you don’t want to tell me what you were talking about, just say so.”

Okay, that works. “We don’t really want to tell you what we were talking about,” you say. Ember nods profusely in agreement. Spike shrugs, seemingly okay with that, and after a few moments he comes back and hands you a cup of coffee, placing his own down on the table.

“You know, for a trip to the Dragon Lands, this feels an awful lot like Twilight’s tree library.”

Tree Library? You’ve never heard about that. “What library now?”

“Oh yeah, I guess she never told you. It’s a pretty bad memory, after all. But back before the fight with Tirek, we lived in this tree that had been hollowed out into a house, and a library. Tirek kinda blew it up during their battle, though.”

“... I fail to see the problem,” you reply, earning odd looks from the two dragons. “I mean sure, her house blew up, but now she lives in a castle. A friggin’ CASTLE.”

“I’m sure you’d feel different if it was your home that exploded,” Ember argues. She almost has a point, but…

“Maybe for a bit,” you chuckle, “but I’d be moving into a castle!”

“You keep saying ‘castle’ as if they’re some sort of mystical buildings that you’ll never be able to go into. Don’t you live in one?” Ember asks, eyebrow raised curiously.

“Damn straight I do.”

Spike chuckles at your behavior, turning to Ember. “So what’s the plan for today?”

“I was actually waiting for you to wake up,” Ember replies, her face showing a bit of the excitement she has in her plan. “I was hoping that we could go out, and let you two get to know some of the other dragons.”

Meeting more dragons, huh? Well, Pyre had certainly seemed pretty cool. It would be nice to just hang out and chat with him, if your conversation had been any indication of his personality. You can only hope that most of the other dragons are like him. You smile. “I’m game.”

You look over to Spike, and he offers up his own smile. “Yeah, it could be fun! I just hope we don’t run into Garble….”

“Not like Garble would be able to do much with Ember around,” you say, pointing in her direction with your thumb. “He’d never disobey as Dragon Lord as cool as her.”

You keep your eyes focused on Spike, but you just know that Ember is blushing. “H-heh, thanks. But I’ve still got a lot to learn, and my hope is that Spike can teach me a bit more about being a good friend.”

“Well if he fails, you’ve always got me, “ you wink at her. That makes her giggle, and you feel as though you’ve succeeded in finally saying something she liked. What a fuckin’ miracle. And hey, that laugh was actually kinda—

“Uh, are you okay, bro?” Spike asks, nudging your shoulder and pulling you away from your thoughts. “You’re, like, totally staring at Ember.”

You blush a bit at his words, and turn sharply towards him. “Dude, shut up!”

Ember giggles again, and the two of you turn back to her. Damn, that giggle is cute. “Is this what being friends is like?”

“If you mean always poking fun at each other, then you’re spot on,” you reply, smirking. “Now, what do you say we go meet some dragons?”

The One Where You Do Something Weird (& Have to Re-Read Three Year Old Chapters :P)

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As you walk through the scorched, barren Dragon Lands, you try your best to stick close to Spike and Ember. The last thing you’d want to do is piss off the wrong dragon and not have any backup on standby.

Hell, you don’t want to piss off any dragon.

“You alright, bro?”

Spike’s question knocks you out of your stupor, and you look down to meet his worried gaze. “Y-yeah, I’m okay.”

Ember’s tail slithers up, and comes crashing back down to the ground with a thud as she stops to address you. “The stutter in your voice says otherwise. Don’t tell me the only human in Equestria is afraid of dragons,” she mocks you. Though she’s not wrong.

“Well, duh,” you affirm. “Dragons can fucking breathe fire and rip creatures apart with their bare claws.”

“Mmm.”

“Aw, c’mon,” Spike interjects. “Now that Ember is in charge, things like that won’t happen anymore. She’ll be the best Dragon Lord ever.”

Ember sighs. “I wouldn’t be so sure, Spike. One of my scouts reported back recently, with news of an attack on Fillydelphia.”

“Who was responsible?” you ask. Ember peers up to the sky, a look of contemplation painted across her face. This is probably the first time you’ve actually seen the dragoness show some form of doubt since you’d met her.

“A rogue female,” she replies. “She wasn’t able to do much before the local guards ran her off, but she’s not doing any favors for the process of diplomacy between our nations.”

“If my world is anything to go by,” you say, managing to grab her attention, “you don’t need to worry. Most people can see that one bad apple doesn’t spoil the whole bunch. Of course, you’ll find those people who believe that one act is representative of an entire race, or religion, but they couldn’t be any more wrong.”

Ember doesn’t say anything, but gives a slight nod of approval to go along with the faintest of smiles. Shifting her head to the right, she beckons for the two of you to begin following her again.

“With gusto, captain,” you joke. Even though her head turned away from you, you swear you can see her rolling her eyes. Meanwhile, you use yours to scan the surrounding area. Geysers are certainly plentiful in the Dragon Lands, and plenty of dragons are putting them to good use with Winter quickly approaching. “So, what do you call this part?”

“This is Geyser Gorge,” she answers. “When the Dragon Lands begin to grow cold, the geysers release their natural gasses and help warm up the area.”

“Kind of like letting a shower steam up a restroom?”

Ember nods. “Yes, but on a much larger scale. The air becomes so thick that the average pony finds it hard to breathe when outside.”

You raise an eyebrow at that, something she quickly takes note of.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay staying here?” she asks. Then grins. Oh lord, here it comes. “After all, I’d hate to see the only human in Equestria die because he was too stupid to breathe.”

Before you can offer up a reply, Spike tugs on your arm. You look down to meet him, only to see that he’s pointing to one of the geysers. “Hey, check it out. Aren’t those the dragons we met when we first got here?”

“Huh.” You definitely do remember seeing the largest of the group before. “That’s Pyre, right?”

“Ah, so you’ve already met Pyre,” Ember pipes up. “He’s one of my most loyal dragons. When Garble tried to stage an uprising, he was the first one to place himself between the two of us.”

“Huh, no kidding?” You reply. Damn, that gave you some new respect for the guy. “Maybe we should go say hey?”

“If you insist,” Ember shrugs, flapping her wings and taking to the air.

“Welp, looks like we’re going on foot,” you chuckle, earning a laugh from Spike. The walk over there isn’t long, but it’s definitely hot. If this is how the Dragon Lands are all the time, then it’s going to take some getting used to.

By the time the two of you arrive, Ember is already knee-deep in conversation with Pyre. Luckily, he spots you, giving an upward nod of his head. You nod right back, letting him finish up his conversation with Ember.

“So I told him, ‘If you can’t handle being ruled by a girl, then tough luck finding a home on this planet,” Pyre boasts, causing his friend group to erupt in laughter. Ember, to her regal credit, only giggles.

“I was going to introduce you to Spike and his friend, but apparently they took the liberty of doing it themselves,” Ember glared abjectly at you.

“Ah, don’t sweat it,” Pyre smiles. “If it helps, she said you were ‘kinda charming’ while you were walking over here.”

In an instant, all the blue faded from Ember’s cheeks, replaced by the deepest of reds. Her stammer matched her blush to a ‘T’. “Th-that never happened. Shut the heck up, Pyre!”

“Your stammer says otherwise,” you finally clap back for her earlier insult. Truth be told, you’re absolutely floored that she’d said something like that, but you may as well roll with it. “‘Sides, it’s okay. I know I’m full of charisma,” you finish, striking an exaggerated pose, much to the amusement of Pyre and his group, whose uproarious laughter drowns out any reply Ember tries to throw out.

By the time their laughter finally dies down, Ember is shaking, face still as red as ever. Only this time, you can tell she’s pissed. “Alright, that’s it. Tour’s over. We’re going home, now!” she shouts, violently flapping her wings and flying off.

You and Spike simultaneously let out sighs. “Well, we’d better do what she says,” Spike says, earning a nod from you.

“Thanks for the laugh, Pyre,” you called out over you shoulder as the two of you begin the trek home.

“Hah, any time!” he shouts back.

Ember might be angry, but one thing is definitely certain. Not all dragons are scary. Some of them are downright fucking hilarious.

Dinner time. Every night, you thank Celestia that dragons eat fish, otherwise you’d starve for sure. Still, this meal wasn’t going to be without intrigue. As you pull out your seat and plop down on it, Ember slams her fork down on the table. The sound echoes through the dinner hall, eliciting a wince from you.

“Why is it just you tonight?” She demands. “Where is Spike?”

“Sleeping,” you reply. That earns another slam of her utensil. Fuck this, you’re not going to let her foul attitude ruin your meal. Instead of elaborating, you poke at the tilapia she’s given you with your own fork, read to chow down.

“Aren’t you curious?”

“Huh?” You ask, shoving an especially delectable piece of fish in your waiting maw. “Curioush abou’ what,” you try to ask around your food.

“Why I said I think you’re… ‘charming’,” she spits out, disgust lacing her voice.

You gulp down your first bite. “Not really. I don’t really care if you find me charming. You’re kind of, you know… a dragon?”

Ember shoves herself away from the table, rising to her feet. Her hands go to her hips, and this is where you realize you’ve fucked up. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

You let out a very annoyed sigh, and roll your eyes. This was getting out of hand, and fast. Freaking Pyre. “Look,” you begin, “it means we’re not compatible. Even if you do think I’m charming, attractive, cute, whatever, I definitely do not feel the same way about you.”

Oh, shit. That might not have been the best thing to—

“Y-you think I’m ugly?” She chokes out. To your utter shock, tears begin to well up in the corners of her eyes. Before you can object, she takes off from the dining hall and flies in the direction of her personal chambers. The sound of a door slamming shut makes you wince yet again.

“Well, that could have gone better,” you announce to the empty room. After prodding at your food for another minute, only to realize you’ve lost whatever appetite you had, you make the somewhat foolish decision to go talk to her. “Well, on the bright side, it can’t get any worse…”

You can make out what sounds like sniffling on the other side of the door. It’s definitely not like Ember to show any semblance of weakness, be it physical or emotional, so something is wrong.

With a gulp, you rap lightly upon her door. You hear a faint gasp, then what sounds like items being shuffled around. “Who is it?”

“It’s me,” you answer.

She gives a defeated sigh, and you hear the click of the door unlocking. “Ugh, just come in.”

You do as she asks, gently pushing her door open and walking into the darkness. The door clicks back shut behind you, and find yourself totally lost in the pitch black of her room. “Uh… Mind lighting a candle?”

“Oh, right. You humans can’t see well in the dark,” she says, gently blowing on a candle, igniting a flame on it. It’s still pretty dark, but much more manageable. “Just sit on the bed.”

You walk over to the foot of it and plop down next to her. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” Ember asks. You can tell she’s trying to remain composed, but her voice is betraying her with a tinge of sadness. “You were just being honest…”

You turn your head to face Ember, whose gaze remains focused on the floor. As you take in her features, one thing becomes very apparent. “Well… not entirely.”

Ember’s gaze rises back up to meet you, as her tail slithers around on the ground. “What is that supposed to be mean?”

You rub the back of your head, chuckling nervously. “I mean, you are shapely. F-for a dragon,” you add.

Ember blushes a little. “Frankly, I’m the one who owes you an apology. I shouldn’t have yelled at you and Spike the way I did.”

“You were embarrassed,” you say. “Anyone else would have reacted the same way, especially if they’re in a position like yours. You’re not supposed to seem vulnerable.”

“Right…” Ember mutters. She idly twiddles her claws. Something is on her mind, surely. “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, anything,” you smile.

“What is a… kiss, like?”

Your eyes go wide, and you fall into a coughing fit. That is not a question you’d expected to hear from the Dragon Lord. After regaining your composure, you speak quietly. “I’ll tell you, but only if you answer a question for me first.”

“If I must,” she nods, a little smile present on her lips.

“Why aren’t you called the Dragon ‘Lady’?”

“Tradition,” she answers, immediately back to her regal self as she begins to explain. “The Dragon Lands have had hundreds of leaders, some male and some female. The title has nothing to do with our sex, it’s just a title meant to display power. I think you’d agree that ‘lord’ has more power to it than ‘lady’.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” you nod. Your gaze falls down to the floor, and you now find yourself twiddling your thumbs. “Now, I guess I owe you an answer as well…”

“Don’t bother.”

Curiosity gets the best of you and you decide to look back at Ember, just to see why she’s had a sudden change of heart. “What do you m–”

Your breath is taken away, replaced by the warmth of the Dragon Lord’s lips, which are now firmly planted upon your own. On any other day, you might have screamed and ran away, but honestly… you were afraid of upsetting her more. Surprisingly, her lips are soft, a sensation you aren’t against.

It feels like forever before her lips pop free of yours, a thin strand of saliva hanging between them. Your heart is pounding out of your chest. She doesn’t seem to care, though, and just smirks.

“Hm. Not bad.”

The One Where Things Go Full Scalie (Or: Seven Tries to Write Sensual Porn & Fails) [CLOP]

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Throwing caution to the wind, you throw yourself backwards, nearly knocking Ember off the bed in the process. “What the fuck was that?!”

The dragoness takes a moment to right herself, and you’re shocked to see that she doesn’t even look upset. “What?” She shrugs. “I didn’t think you would be able to explain what a kiss is like through words.”

“What, and that book you spent so much time reading didn’t help?”

She gives a little waggle of the hand. “Eh.”

“Yeah, well…” you trail off, treading carefully over your next words. You can’t help but look over her body once more, taking in her curves. You hate yourself for it, but you’ve gotta admit Ember is actually kinda hot. Still… “You shouldn’t kiss someone without asking first.”

The Dragon lord’s hands fly to her hips. “Are you saying you didn’t like it?”

“Uh…” Well, damn. She’s definitely got you there. “Look, that’s not the point. There’s a little thing called ‘consent’.”

“And would you have ‘consented’ to me kissing you, had I asked?” she prods you.

“Again, not the point,” you deflect her question. “It doesn’t matter how pretty you may or may not be. If you did that to a pony, it would be a huge thing.”

Ember shrugs. “Well, good thing you’re not a pony then. So it doesn't really matter, does it?”

“Oh, piss off,” you reply. “Look, that kiss definitely wasn’t the worst thing in the world, just… ask next time?”

Ember groans to go along with a roll of her eyes. “Ugh, I suppose.” Suddenly, her demeanor changes to more match your own shocked look. “N-not that I’m going to be asking you again,” she finishes off with a blush.

“Sure you aren’t.” Your sardonic reply doesn’t fall on deaf ears, as you suddenly find yourself jabbed in the side by her tail. “Ow!” You rub at the spot she had pricked. “What was that for?”

“For assuming that I’m into you,” Ember sticks her tongue out at you.

“Well, I mean… you did kiss me,” you shrug. “But if you say so.”

“And so what if I am?” Ember rambles on, seemingly ignoring your retort. “I’m the Dragon Lord. I make the rules. It’s not a crime to like someone that isn’t a dragon. It’s not a crime to find the only human on the planet attractive. And it’s certainly not a crime to take what’s mine,” she finishes, staring you down steadfast, lust evident in her glossed over eyes.

“Wait, wh—”

Your breath is taken away as the Dragon Lord lunges at you, knocking you onto your back as her lips connect with yours. Any struggle you could have put up is quashed as her hands pin yours down to the bed. With no means to resist, and her snake-like tongue seeking its way to your mouth, you make your decision and there’s no going back.

Fuck it…

You grant her tongue entrance, meeting it with your own. You can sense Ember’s surprise as her body trembles slightly, her once-firm grasp on your hands weakening. Taking advantage of what mobility you have, you resolve to wrap your arms around the dragoness and pull her tighter to yourself.

“Mmm…” Ember moans, sinking further into your body. Your right eye pops open as you feel something slithering under your back, only to see that her tail is beginning to entwine itself around your body, once again removing your option to leave.

Not that you would have anyways. Once all the cards were on the table, it was all too easy for Ember to call your bluff.

And it feels oh so good…

You’re not sure how, but you manage to gather enough strength to turn the tides on the dragon, deftly flipping over onto your stomach with Ember now pinned below you. Shock is evident on her face as she finally pulls away from you, bringing your second kiss to a close.

“You do find me ‘cute’, don’t you?” She grins.

“In a ‘dang, she’s pretty cute for an angry dragon’ kinda way.” You shoot back an even larger grin, though it quickly evaporates as you feel something prodding at the front of your jeans. Peering down, you spy her tail, still wrapped around your body, trying its hardest to pull your clothing off. “Uh… it has a zipper,” you advise her. “But… are you sure you want to do this?”

“The Dragon Lord always knows what she wants,” Ember replies, craning her head up next to yours. You don’t have a chance to reply as you feel her teeth clamp down ever so slightly on your earlobe. The sensation forces an involuntary moan from you, earning a purr of satisfaction from the dragoness. From there, her tail makes quick work of your pants, ripping them off and tossing them to the floor as she continues to nibble on your ear.

The sudden sensation of her tail running over the front of your boxers is more than you can bear, and you force her back down before locking your lips against hers. All the while, her tail continues its ministrations, causing your member to swell up. Ember takes notice, shooting you a grin.

“Pent up, are we?” She mewls. You sense that she gets some satisfaction from putting you in this situation, something that further proves evident as she continues. “It must be hard, not having any way of finding release in this world.”

Normally, you’d offer up a witty remark, but something about the compromising situation you’ve found yourself in keeps you from speaking up. At least for now.

“I’m sure you’ve longed for a moment like this…” She murmurs, her tail forcing its way through the flap in your boxers. The nimble appendage runs across your shaft, and you let out a little pant. Fuck, she knows just what to say and do to get under your skin. “All you have to do is let loose, and you can finally have the release you’ve been longing for…”

“You know what, Ember?”

She raises an eyebrow at you. “What?”

“Shut up and let me fuck you.”

“Heh, that’s more like it…” she smirks. The sound of fabric ripping resounds through the room, and you find yourself looking back to where the action is going to take place.

Your swollen member flops down onto her belly as she rips your boxers off completely, a thin strand of pre oozing forth from it. It’s at this moment that you look back down and finally notice her nether regions. Your eyes widen as you can feel the heat emanating from her folds.

“I’ve never done this before,” she says, drawing your attention back to her face. A light blush permeates her cheeks, yet somehow, she looks as resolute as ever. “Forget ‘foreplay’,” she no doubt quotes the book she’d been reading up on, “I just want you inside of me.”

You could have said a lot of things in response to that. Maybe something sensual? Or even something funny, to ease the tension a bit? Instead, you settle on something so stupid that even you aren’t sure why you asked it.

“It’s the Winter Solstice, isn’t it?”

“Well, duh,” Ember responds, moving her hand to take hold of your erection. Her smooth scales work quickly to coax your dick into reaching its full length in no time, the sensation not unlike a snake slithering across your skin. As she begins to tug on you, you can’t help but find yourself looking back down. The sight alone is enough to cause more pre to well up on the tip. “Well… are you ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” you answer in earnest, your body simply aching for release at this point. Ember does her best to guide you towards her waiting folds, and you thrust forward as you make contact with them. She’s slicker than you expected, causing you to miss your target and simply slide your dick over her labia.

Redoubling your efforts, you guide yourself to her entrance and finally sink into her waiting depths. Both of you moan as the sensation washes over you, and you lock your lips back over hers. The heat she’s pumping out works wonders on you, and she’s definitely tighter than you expected. After only a couple inches, you find it difficult to ease into her. You retract ever so slowly, something that you can feel Ember protesting. Just as you’re about to free yourself, you thrust back down, eliciting a cute moan from her as she gives you a few more inches.

It’s not enough, though. You want all of her.

Your next thrust is enough to shake the bed, and Ember forces her tongue back into your waiting mouth, an action you find yourself eager to reciprocate. As your tongue mingles with hers, you finally feel your thighs meet hers on your next thrust.

Ember ends your kiss, gazing at you with eyes full of lust. “Take me…”

You do just that, beginning to pump in and out of her with earnest, her molten hot insides trying their best to keep you inside all the while. Ember wraps her arms around you, and you find yourself speeding up. You know you’re not going to last. It’s been too long since you’ve had release. Still, you find yourself wanting to make her feel good.

Your eyes lock with hers, every little whimper and moan making you fall for this damn dragon even more. Just seeing the subtle reactions on her face are enough for you, and you find yourself content to just watch her. Every little thrust elicits a tiny wince from her, and her tongue lolls out of her mouth. On a particularly hard thrust, her eyes shoot open and she blushes as you stare her down.

You’d expected her to be much more domineering, but as you find yourself drawing closer to the edge, you’re glad she let you take the lead.

The more you speed up, the more you can feel her own body tense up. You know she’s nearing her own edge, and something in you really wants to help guide her over it. Using her now-hot chest, you push backwards and brace yourself with your knees. Grabbing her by her sides, you continue thrusting into her at an even wilder pace.

With nothing else left to grasp, her claws clench on the bed-sheets as her back begins to arch upwards. She’s freely moaning by this point, and you’re eager to draw more out of her as you make her yours. Every slap of flesh serves only to turn you on even further, and you find yourself overcome with a want to use her, just as she used your feelings against you.

“M-more…” Ember manages to whimper through her moans.

You’re all too happy to oblige. You grab one of her legs and stretch it upwards, wrapping your arms around it as you pound her with everything you have, sending both of you careening towards your breaking point. Through all of this, one thing is clear, and you make sure she knows it.

“You’re mine,” you growl through gritted teeth, releasing her leg and letting it flop back to the bed.

You feel her tighten around you, and her body tenses up as she lets out a labored moan at your words. Her climax works well to coax you towards your own, and you feel that ever-present coil in your body beginning to tighten, ready to explode. You only last a few more thrusts before everything goes white and the dam inside of you bursts.

You lean forward, you lips crashing into hers as you flood her insides, and she returns your kiss, pulling you closer as her body does its best to take everything you have to give. After a few more pulses, you find yourself ending the kiss.

Through your heavy panting, you can only manage to say one thing.

“Holy fuck…”

The One Where You Do It. Again. [CLOP]

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The warmth of the quilt covering you is blissful, but it’s nothing compared to the heat being put out by the dragoness laying next to you. Sex with a dragon certainly wasn’t something you’d expected to be having when you fell into Equestria, but now that it happened, you definitely aren’t going to complain.

You feel a shuffling under the sheets, and turn to see Ember awake, laying on her side and staring right back at you. Realization seems to spread across her face in the form of a heated blush, and she struggles to speak.

“S-so, uh, about last night…”

You smirk. “Pretty good, right?”

Ember bites her lip, turning her head away to avoid your stare. You spy her peeking from the corner of her eye, though. “Y-yeah. For my first time, at least.”

Your heart plants itself firmly in your throat. “Oh god. I, uh, I was your… first?”

“Mhm,” she nods, turning back to face you. Her voice is markedly quieter than usual. “Father always warned me about sharing my first time with a dragon.”

“Isn’t he a, you know, dragon?” You ask, eyebrow raising.

“Well duh,” Ember replies, rolling her eyes. “But he’s still my dad. His views on girls might not be the greatest, but he cares about me.”

“Sounds like a better dad than most dragons would be,” you chuckle. “But if you’re worrying about me doing something to hurt you, I won’t.”

That earns you a slight smile from Ember. “Thank you. I, uh, didn’t expect things to go as far as they did last night.”

“Do you regret it?”

“You know,” Ember sits up a little, the covers sliding off of both of you a bit as she does, “I really thought that I would. But… not really. You might be a bit of a ‘smart-ass’ or whatever you call it, but Spike was right.”

Confusion spreads through you. Spike had talked to her about you? Well duh, of course he had. But about something like this?

“What did he say?” You ask.

“He told me that he could always count on you. That even if you’re mad at him, you’ll still come through to help him,” Ember explained.

“Well, I can’t argue with that,” you reply. “We’ve had our fights, but I’d die for my bro.”

“... Would you die for me?” Ember asks.

You hesitate. That’s not the response you had expected, for sure. Thinking about it, though, you were certain about one thing. “Yeah. I would.”

Ember smiles.

“You did what!?”

“Yeah,” you answer, sporting a huge grin. A stupid, happy grin. You lean back in your chair. “It was pretty damn good, too.”

“You know, normally I’d give you a high five out of respect, but this is huge,” Spike replies, leaning forward in his own. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”

You shrug. “Had sex with a dragon?”

“You had sex with the Dragon Lord,” he corrects you. “Did you not read the book Twilight gave you?”

“Gonna have to be more specific,” you say.

Spike smacks a claw to his face, dragging it down comically and drawing a chuckle from you. “Dude, the book that’s all about dragon culture?”

“Oh, right,” you nod. “I leafed through it a bit, but I figured I’d learn more by actually being here.”

“Oh, you’re gonna be learning a lot real soon,” Spike retorts. The young drake hops down from his seat, and waltzes over to Ember’s expansive bookshelf. Twilight must have taught him well, because it only takes him a few seconds seconds before he grabs the book in question, tossing it over to you.

You catch it clumsily. “Uh, so what am I supposed to do with this?”

“Flip to chapter twelve,” your buddy advises you, “and read the first paragraph.”

With a huff of your breath, you do as Spike tells you and open the book, reading through the table of contents. Once you locate chapter twelve, you quickly make your way there.

“‘Chapter Twelve: Dragon Mating Habits’,” you recite the title aloud and chuckle. “I think I know a bit about this now, Spike.”

“Why don’t you go ahead and read that first paragraph out loud then?” Spike smirks.

With a quick shake of your head, you oblige. As you read, though, you can practically feel your heart beginning to drop.

“‘When a new Dragon Lord is chosen, they will typically spend their first few months deciding on a potential mate. Once a partner is chosen, they will go through what dragons call the ‘Four Rites’. These rites of passage are meant to test a dragon’s strength, courage, and honor. Survival is not a guarantee.’

You lower the book down, staring at Spike. “...”

“I tried to warn you, bro.”

“... Maybe she won’t make me do those rites,” you laugh nervously, pulling at the neck of your shirt. “Is it hot in here? It feels so hot.”

“Alright, just calm down man. Look, we’ll figure a way out of this,” Spike says. “For now, promise me you won’t do what you did again.”

“I promise.”

You gulp. Hopefully you can find that way out.

Weakness was one thing. But your absolute inability to stop yourself from being with Ember was something else entirely.

The dragoness pants below you as you straddle her. “God damn it, I just can’t stop myself,” you say.

“That’s for the best,” Ember breathily replies, reaching between your legs to grab hold of your shaft. Her claws burn so good, sending a pulse of pleasure throughout your body as you grow harder. “After all, you wouldn’t be so mean as to deprive me of your thick cock,” she asks, using her thumb to rub your tip, spreading precum across the head. “Would you?”

You shudder. “W-wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Good,” Ember says, repositioning her claw to grasp at the base of your shaft. Ever so slowly, she runs it upward. “Not that you’d really have a say in the matter. We both know you wouldn’t resist.”

Her ministrations begin to pick up in speed, and you find yourself thrusting aimlessly towards her. One of your hands extends to the top of her head, holding you in place. “F-fuck.”

“I’m sure you’ll do fine with the Four Rites,” she says, finally addressing what was on both of your minds.

“W-what do I have to do?” You ask, gasping a little as she tightens her grasp.

“We’ll discuss that later,” she says, then smirks.

Keeping her claw firmly planted to the bottom of your member, she cranes her neck forward to give the head a teasing lick. It sends tingles through you, and you wordlessly beg for more with a little thrust. Ember is happy to oblige, guiding your dick to the opening of her mouth. Pleasure jolts through you as she wraps her lips around it.

Pace is thrown out the window as she quickly begins bobbing her head up and down, all the while running her snake-like tongue up and around the shaft. It’s all you can do not to blow your load right there. But you’re not planning on letting this end that quickly. Deciding to make the most of a fucked up situation, you pull yourself back, getting free from her mouth with a ‘pop’. Before Ember can say anything, you forcefully push her back and shuffle yourself backwards, lining your cock up with her entrance.

“What are you do— Ah~!” Ember cries out, clutching the sheets as you slip inside her effortlessly. If you were pent up last time, you were like an out of control freight train this time around. “F-fuck!” She cries out as you slide to the hilt.

“Just shut up and let me fuck you,” you say, grabbing her thighs to hold yourself steady. You begin to pump in and out with fervor, bed shaking beneath you two. Ember’s back arches upwards, her claws ripping at the quilt beneath you. Still, you don’t relent your assault. The wet slaps of your thighs meeting again and again drives you further. As her back falls back down, your fingers dig into her plump thighs, eliciting a squeal of delight from the dragoness.

You feel her tighten around you, her folds heating up as she cums around you. It draws you closer to your own finish, but you’re not satisfied yet. With renewed determination, and a primal want to please your new partner, you grab her legs and push them upwards until her knees are inches from her face. Ember seems to know what you want, wrapping her arms through the crook under her knees and holding them in place.

Your hands find their way to her abdomen, and you grasp it as tightly as you can before going back to work. Ember’s eyes roll back as your cock slams into her G-spot relentlessly. This new position also does more to squeeze at you, and you find yourself inching ever closer towards release.

You use the opportunity to reach a hand back to where the action is going on. You extend your thumb, running it across the little clit peeking out. Ember whines, and you love it. Applying a little more force, you do circles on the nub, all the while still keeping up your onslaught below.

With a cry, Ember peaks again. Her pussy does everything in its power to milk you dry, and you struggle to hold back. Still, you manage to continue your thrusts long enough to coax her into her third orgasm. Finally, the intense heat and pressure becomes too much to bear. With one final, powerful thrust, you go as deep as you can go and explode. Rope after rope of searing hot cum paints her inner walls, drawing a heated moan from her. It feels like you’re going to drain yourself entirely once the flow finally comes to a stop.

A mixture of your fluids begins to leak out, and you finally manage to pull yourself free of her confines. Ember’s arms fall down, her legs crashing back to the bed around you. You share a look of satisfaction with her.

“We should do this more often.”

“Try… every… day,” she pants out.

You could get used to this.

Exotic

by Lucky Seven

The One Where You Reacquaint Yourself With the Dragon Lord

The One Where You Read a Book

The One Where You Discuss Various Bits of History

The One Where You Talk About... You Know

The One Where You Do Something Weird (& Have to Re-Read Three Year Old Chapters :P)

The One Where Things Go Full Scalie (Or: Seven Tries to Write Sensual Porn & Fails) [CLOP]

The One Where You Do It. Again. [CLOP]