Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
Somewhere...
Amidst a splotch of sunlit gravel...
Several specks of ruby-colored dust lay in a shattered circle.
Hooves crunched and crunched across the forsaken sediment.
The shadow of a petite pegasus drew over the scene.
A blue hoof reached out, needlessly pawing at the flaky remains of the ruby griffon stone.
Rainbow Dash stared, eyes thin and dull.
Her nostrils flared from the weight of a dense sigh.
Lancie slowly stepped up behind her, rubbing his chin in thought.
"Is it completely smashed?" he asked.
The pony slowly nodded. With a gulp, Rainbow muttered, "I dropped it harder than a DJ-P0N3 track."
"Very well then." Lancie swung his arms behind him. "I'll pretend that I even remotely understand that."
"Mrmmfff..." Rainbow grunted out the side of her muzzle. "So kill me for trying to summon a scraggily sense of humor."
"Bonus points on the whimsy," Lancie said with a slight smirk. He snapped a talon. "A two out of ten on delivery."
"Meh." Rainbow sighed, plopping down on her haunches. "I blew it, Lancie. Our one and only ticket both in and out of this Celestia-forsaken spit trough of a continent."
"Mmmmmm... not necessarily." He took a few bold steps forward, crunching through the gravel on tiny stone feet. "Assuming we get my shards from Big Boss—and I do mean all of my shards... then I should have more than enough power to whisk us away from this charming lost world."
"And save Apple Bloom, right?" Rainbow retorted with the hint of a growl.
"But of course, Sparky!" Lancie smirked, coming to a stop behind her. He folded his stone arms. "That's precisely what I meant to imply."
"Because... if it comes down to it..." Rainbow Dash gulped. "I'd totally prefer that you would—"
"Yes yes..." Lancie rolled his gray eyes. "It's never about you. Everypony knows that the great and awesome Rainbow Dash would gladly waste away in a far-off land, rather than allow a certain marefriend's baby sister to die. Only... eheh... nopony truly knows, am I right?"
Rainbow clenched her teeth. Her tail flicked once, then hung in silence.
Lancie stared at her, blinking. He swallowed and spoke in a low tone: "Rainbow Dash... just how long were you seeing her."
"... ... ...who, Applejack?"
"Correctomundo."
Rainbow sighed, shuddering slightly. "Ever since the cave..."
"With Charlotte?"
"The big friggin' spider. Yeah." Rainbow gulped. "I... I don't think all of that venom gunk wore off."
"And what was she doing, exactly?" Lancie craned his neck. "Aside from exotic fan-dances right up in your muzzle?"
Rainbow grimaced. "It's not—!" She clenched her eyes shut, sighing. "It's not like that. I... almost wish it was."
"No doubt."
Rainbow was silent.
"Do... you see her now?"
Slowly, hesitantly, Rainbow Dash opened her eyes.
An orange face full of freckles stared back at her, smiling.
Rainbow tilted back, her teeth gnashing. She forced her head to turn towards Lancie. "What... if I had no response to that...?"
Lancie face-palmed with a sigh. "Sparky, I know I may not exactly be cuddle material, but if you 'neeeeeed meeeeee' so badly, then perhaps it would be most beneficial that you told me about these sorts of things."
"I... guess I didn't see the use."
"The use in what?" Lancie cackled, waving his stone arms. "In letting me know that your better judgment was being wrecked by a grotesque doppelganger of your one true love?"
"Lancie..." Rainbow glared down at the statue. "Y'know... there was a time when I wasn't entirely sure if you were real."
Lancie grinned. "Wanna bet if the jury's still out on that?"
"Unnnngh!" Rainbow rolled her eyes and folded her forelimbs. "Don't friggin' do that, dude! I am so not in the mood!"
"I'd say smash him to bits, sugarcube," Applejack said, rubbing up against the pegasus like a big fuzzy kitten. "He'd be plum easy to hide in this here gravel."
Rainbow bit her lip.
"Hmmm?" Lancie caught the expression. "Lemme guess. Now she's professing her undying apple love to you."
"No, actually, she's suggesting I break you into tiny pebbles and hide you amongst the gravel."
"Hah! Now that would be a mare with good taste!"
"I'm being serious."
Lancie froze in place, blinking. "Oh." He blinked harder. "Huh."
"She tells me that kind of stuff a lot," Rainbow muttered. "Oddly enough, this is a little less creative..."
"Well, then..." Lancie took a few steps aside. "Maybe that... means that the effect is wearing off."
Rainbow's eyes darted up, watching as Applejack mimicked a noose around Lancie's neck. "Uhhhh... not as much as you'd hope."
"Well, we could stand around here and wait for you to get saner," Lancie said, oblivious of the apple spectre lingering behind him. "But you're not the only pony who's been venomized, aren't you?"
Rainbow sighed. "Dun need to remind me twice."
"Ah, go on and take another one of yer endless naps, sugarcube," Applejack said with a glinting smirk. "Come to think of it, Apple Bloom would be a lot easier to rock to sleep when she's dead."
Rainbow huffed and puffed. "Yeah." She trotted over to where her saddlebag lay and strung the thing swiftly over her flanks. "Let's move. Now."
"Anything I can do, Sparky?" Lancie asked, following after her.
"Yeah." She scooped the little statue up and placed him in one of her satchels. "Don't. Stop. Talking."
"Excelsior!" Lancie pumped his arm while Rainbow Dash took off, abandoning an orange equine figure on the surface. "Something I'm relatively expert at!"
"Meh... don't get a big head, it'll snap right off."
"And then Applejack could put it in a basket, right?"
"Oh hush!"
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Star Trek reference?
Hey, I never doubted you were real.
Awww! Dashie finally is opening up to one of her friends, about anything. As opposed to random strangers.
Go Lancie!
Though I have a question? Are we nine chapters away from doom?
I really hope Lancie doesn't turn on Rainbow. My feels couldn't take that.
6352156
No, Marvel Comics. I believe the starship was Excalibur, not Excelsior. Stan Lee used to sign off his editorials that way.
Other than this sadistic Applejack doppelganger, it's good to know Rainbow's sanity is somewhat in check again.
Now...off to big baddie dragon!
And for the second time, Lancie actually called her by name.
Just so you remember, guys. That hallucination is there for all those saying Appledashery doesn't have enough Applejack.
6352488 Sulu's ship was Excelsior.
At this point I think Lancie knows more about the real Rainbow Dash than the mane six, with the possible exception of Fluttershy.
It's going to be heartbreaking to read if one of the few people Rainbow trusts enough to open up to betrays her.
Huzzah! More Lancie and Rainbow banter!
6353259
I really hope the hallucination is there for a bit more than that, like giving Rainbow a warning about the group tailing her. That way, she's not completely blindsided and facing down two groups of enemies.
Anyone else get a Ratchet and Clank ish vibe from that?
...you're probably all sick of me filling up the front page with comments on long past chapters too.
Well hey. I'm closing the gap, just a little longer.
Can't believe no one pointed out this Star Trek reference, especially since plane boy below made a Star Trek stab.
Is that seriously just the venom talking? For a hallucination, AJ is being remarkably articulate and persistent in what she wants RD to do.