Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
The B-Cubed pivoted about with dramatic speed, grinding the stone surface of the cavern floor up with its tank treads. From inside the core of the vehicle, the stone limb vibrated and strobed with unearthly light.
“Yessss! She speaks to me!” Top Dog's voice rang through the massive speaker system. The mechanical limbs swayed across the room, re-aiming at Rainbow's flopping figure. “The Big Bitchin' Bitch hungers for ponyyyyyy blood! Raaaaugh!” The claws swung again.
Rainbow barely flew out of the way while the impacting limb rained gravel and debris all over her figure. “Mmmmfnnngh—Guh!” She looked up, wincing.
The topmost center of the turret glowed with chaotic energy.
“Well, then!” Lancie popped up out of her satchel and spread his arms. “Looks like Top Dog's got... a leg up on the situation!” He slapped his little stone knee. “Haah haah haah! Ohhhh ho ho ho ho! Whew...” He wiped at an invisible tear. “Sorry, I couldn't help myself.”
“Grrrrrrrrrrr...” Rainbow Dash grabbed the statue and slammed him—antlers first—into the nearest wall. Cliiink! While his stiff body wobbled to a stop, Rainbow stripped of her saddlebag and supplies, tossed her mane, and squatted low on all fours. She faced the tank, nostrils flaring. “BRING IT!”
“I will bury you here under the blood and tears of slaves!” Top Dog rotated his arm about, extended three golden claws, and shoved them in Rainbow's Direction. “And the flatulence of my brothers will be your funeral dirge!”
“Hutt!” Rainbow jumped the swinging limb, galloped up its metal stalk, flapped her wings, and dive-kicked at the cockpit cage. “That all you got you mangy sonuva—”
WHAMMM! An enormous drill slammed into Rainbow's side.
“Ooof!” She flew off, ricocheted off the catwalk, and plummeted towards the rocky floor below. Thud! “Owwwwwwie...” She curled up in a little blue ball. “My squishy parts...”
“What is a pony?!” Top Dog spun the turret around and drove towards her. “Nothing but a miserable pile of cuddles! But enough bark!” He brought both the claws and the drill bit over her. “Have at you! Nnnngh!”
Rainbow winced as she saw the metal limbs sailing down at her aching figure. She hid her muzzle into a pair of bruised forelimbs. “AJ...” a foalish voice whimpered.
Swissssssss! A pair of thick hooves slid into place. CLANG! The metal limbs stopped against a pair of muscular biceps. Iron Will stood over Rainbow Dash, blocking the robotic attack with sheer muscle.
“You... will not... squish pint-size!” Iron Will hollered.
“Ah yes! The labyrinth scum!” Top Dog hissed into the microphone as he tripled the hydraulic motors forcing the limbs down on the minotaur. “You were always the worst slave. Looks like, in a bloody pulpy death, you finally have a use to me!”
“I don't think so, brotha...” Iron Will sweated and heaved, his body buckling under the force of the criss-crossed claws and drill. “No... means... nnnngh... NO!” He shoved the claws back with a vaporous blast of ridiculously masculine energy. ”RAAAAAUGH! HUUUUUUUGE!”
“Wh-What?!” Top Dog flailed in his pilot's seat as the B-Cubed actually slid back from the exchange. “Nothing's impossible! I have chaos on my side!”
“Ruthless Aggression!” Iron Will hollered, the veins showing in his neck. “You wanna ride space mountain!”
“Oh lay an egg, will ya?!” Top Dog thrust forward with the drill.
Iron Will ducked the blow, pointing an angry finger at the cockpit. “YOUUUUUU!” Snorting, he yanked the ring out of his nose, flung it aside, and charged the tank head on. Thud Thud Thud! “Grnnngh!” Taking a running leap, he flew through the air and came down on the top turret with a vicious leg-drop. “Snap into an Iron Will!”
THUDDD!
Rainbow Dash winced, being rolled back by a virtual blast wave. She bumped up against the wall, staring with twitching eyes as sparks and chunks of metal shrapnel flew.
“Whoah...”
“I know, right?” Lancie sputtered from where he struggled to dislodge himself from the wall. “I swear, that impact alone produced rainbows...”
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Don't fuck with Iron Will! O_O
Jeeze.
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Apparently dem muscles aren't for show.
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4388092
Also, this. I wonder if this very, very near brush with death (with her essentially helpless) will push her towards actually making a move...
6 hours over 2 days, 175 chapters. Aww yeah.
So far, all I have to say is HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME and that I'm starting to have hope that this won't end up with a tragedy tag!
4388762 She'd better do it.
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It's one of those "Holy shit I almost died" moments that makes one realize... life is short and no sense in waiting. I'm hoping Dash realizes this and talks to .
4389841 I'm just hoping this doesn't get to be one of those fics where the author takes forever to finish it. We haven't reached season 2 yet. When will Dash finally confess? After the series finale?
>B-Cubed
>Transfer one unit from Cubed to B
>C-Squared
It's like they're fighting to see who's more surreal.
Ooo! This is getting intense!
Current score: 17
4390733
I know, so many references! My RD fangirl-squeee imitation is getting better every chapter!
Wouldn't this i don't know... drill a hole into her side?
Was he referencing this?
OMG OMG OMG!! Awesome reference!!!
Only this author...
4867375 A cartoon drill that ends in a point? Yes. If we are to assume that this is a true history. (That assumption being not at all unreasonable.) We derive our understanding of massive drills from the current selection of massive tunneling devices. These are kilometers long with a flat face covered with sharp wheels that allow the machine to burrow forward. I assume the aforementioned drill is a miniturized version of this. The force on Dashie at he moment of collision is still undoubtably immense because it is spread over a large surface area.
Eee, references.