Ugh, What Happened Last Night?

by JamesBurton

First published

Waking up with a powerful hangover after her friends dragged her away for a girls night out. Twilight Sparkle must embark on an epic quest to locate those who know just what exactly she did last night.

It was Friday night and Twilight Sparkle was at home enjoying the night with a good book and comfortable lounging chair. That was of course until her friends dragged her away for a night of fun. Now its Saturday morning and she has a powerful hangover...And a wife?

Join Twilight as she goes on a quest to discover. What Did She Do Last Night?


I-I don't believe this! I made it in the popular story section on 09/24/12

Now being edited by RandomSomepony4357

Ugh.

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It was a beautiful Saturday morning in the small town of Ponyville. Princess Celestia's sun was beginning to rise over the horizon and the citizens were beginning to awaken to start the day, unlike our residential librarian Twilight Sparkle. The ever punctual, ever faithful student of Princess Celestia was still sleeping in bed. She was currently sprawled out in blissful sleep and snoring with drool running down the side of her mouth. This was the ultimate state of peacefulness, until the sun's rays started to seep through the blinds causing the purple pony to stir awake.

"Mphmm," Twilight groaned as she tossed and turned in bed, trying to block the light entering her room. She slowly opened her eyes and sat up, grabbing her head.

"Augh my head is aching. What happened last night?"

Glancing over to her nightstand she noticed a medium sized bag.

"Oh what's this now? I don't remember this being here," she wondered, grabbed the bag and opened it. "What the?! Its full of bits?!"

It didn't take long before she started panicking. Did she steal them? Or maybe robbed some poor pony at magic point last night? She would have thought of even more scenarios but her pounding headache prevented her from thinking clearly. As she still held her head in pain.

"Come on Twilight," she said to herself as she got off the bed and headed towards her bathroom. "Let’s take a nice relaxing bath, pop some pain relievers and we'll be feeling like a whole new pony."

She turned the faucet. Steaming hot water filled the tub and she went over to her medicine cabinet, but the reflection in its mirror gave her halt. She paused to take a look at herself. Her mane was a mess and her eyes bloodshot, a perfect match for how she felt.

"Heh, you've seen better days, haven't you Twilight?" She asked herself and grabbed some pills and a cup of water. She swallowed the pills and drank the water, sighing in satisfaction, "Ahh, much better."

She turned off the water and got into the tub, allowing the hot water to soothe her muscles and her mind.

"Mmm, this is so relaxing," she said and leaned back. Her eyes started to droop slowly, and soon she fell asleep again.


Yesterday night, 8:30 pm

"Hmm I don't know girls," Twilight said, "I mean, a girls night out sounds fun and all but I was going to stay home and read some books and maybe do a little reorganizing."

"Twilight darling, everypony needs to have a little fun every once in awhile, and you're long overdue for that," replied Rarity, "so come with us, it’ll be fun."

"Yeah, don't be a buzzkill Twilight," Rainbow Dash mocked her.

Pinkie Pie started bouncing around excitedly, "Oh Boy! Oh Boy! Oh Boy! I could sure use a night off after the three parties I threw last week and two full days of foalsitting the Cake twins."

"So you relax from throwing parties by partying even more?" Rainbow Dash questioned.

"Basically," Pinkie replied mid-bounce.

"So ya comin’ with us, sugarcube? We’ll understand if ya don't wanna come," Applejack said.

Twilight sat down on a chair, mulling it over while her friends looked on happy but expectantly. It had been some time since she did anything with her friends and she hadn’t planned to do anything else today.

"Sure why not. I'll go with you guys," Twilight made up her mind.

"Oh boy, tonight is going to be so wonderful," Fluttershy said in between the others’ cheers.


Twilight woke up from her sleep. She had no idea what had happened afterwards but she assumed that she just had a night out with her friends. Now that her hangover was nearly gone she turned her attention back to the bag of bits that sat on her nightstand. Just where exactly did she get that?

"Hmm, I wonder if Spike knows something about it. And speaking of Spike," Twilight sniffed the air. Something was smelling delicious. "I smell breakfast. And it smells like… pancakes!"

After letting the water drain from the tub and stopping by her room to get the bag of bits, the purple unicorn headed downstairs where her breakfast awaited.

"Morning Spike," Twilight greeted him.

"Morning Twilight," Spike replied in between stuffing his face with pancakes.

"Morning honey," Trixie greeted her, flipping a pancake on the skillet.

Twilight sat down next to Spike, waiting for her pancakes. "Morning Trixie."

It didn't take her long to figure out something wasn’t right.

"Uh, Trixie?" Twilight looked confused, “What are you doing in my house?"

“Making pancakes," she replied, hovered a spatula and flipped over a pancake with it.

"I can see that Trixie, but why here? And did you just call me honey?"

Trixie turned around and used her magic to float a stack of pancakes over to Twilight's empty plate. She was wearing a white apron that said A Kissie for your Cook Trixie.

"Well I live here now. So I thought I should make breakfast, now that we're married."

"Wait, wait wait wait," Twilight replied shaking her head. "We got married? That's not possible! Spike, tell her that we're not married!"

"Twilight, you married Trixie and she lives with us now," Spike said and grabbed some more pancakes.

Twilight faced Trixie again with an assured look, "See, Trixie! I didn't marry you—Wait, what?!"

"You married Trixie and she lives here now," Spike repeated, "See, here's the wedding certificate." He held up a piece of paper and pointed at Twilights name. "There's your name right here."

Twilight felt her headache coming back. "Then I guess that this bag of bits is yours then?"

"No, it’s yours," Trixie said and placed more pancakes on a plate, "you even paid for the ceremony and everything, although Trixie is still surprised that you had so much money from last night. You even woke up Princess Celestia during the middle of the night so that she could perform the ceremony. You still never told Trixie where you got the money though."

Twilight had a thousand yard stare. "I did WHAT?!," she asked breathlessly.

In all the years that Twilight knew Princess Celestia, she was always a kind, loving ruler and like a second mother to her—but she knew one thing, wake her up during the middle of the night and you will face the fury of the sun goddess. Even her sister dares not to wake her from her slumber lest all hope will be lost.

But Twilight was still there. She must have done something that made the princess decide to spare her… or did she?

"Well, Trixie shall head to the market and buy some groceries. She will be making something special tonight," she said, taking the bag of money off the table and heading to the front door.

"THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE SHALL RETURN SHORTLY!" She threw a smoke bomb on the floor and disappeared only to come running back a moment later to shut the door, "Sorry about that, honey."

"So, does this make you Twilight Lulamoon or her Trixie Sparkle?" Spike joked.

Twilight only groaned in response. What had happened last night? She needed to find her friends, maybe they could help her if they weren't too wasted themselves. "Spike, I'm going out, I'll be back later!"

Twilight left the house for a few seconds only to come back and sit back down at the table. She grabbed a couple of the pancakes that her wife or husband or whatever made for breakfast and puts them on her plate.

"First I'm going to devour these pancakes, then I’ll find out what happened last night!"

Hangovers Suck

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Twilight gathered her friends and they sat down in a nearby café to discuss last night’s events, she needed to find out what had happened urgently.

"Okay, please explain ta us how in the hay you ended up marrying Trixie," Applejack asked, “we were with you all of last night." She rubbed her chin in thought, "Or at least I think we were."

"Yeah, we were preeeeetty wasted last night," Rainbow Dash chuckled.

"Being wasted is no excuse, Rainbow! Who knows what kinds of things we did," Twilight slammed her hoof on the table, earning an annoyed and wincing look from Pinkie.

"Twilight could you please please pleeeease take it easy with the noise," Pinkie pleaded and laid her head on the table, "Pound Cake thought it would be funny to storm into my room and wake me up with screaming his head off."

"Oh dear, how did you get him to stop?" Fluttershy asked.

"I instilled the fear of Celestia in him and then politely asked him to leave."

Rarity took a sip from her cup of coffee and set it gently back down on the saucer before continuing the discussion. "Anyway, Twilight may have a point. Who knows what we did while intoxicated. The only thing we do know is that Twilight married Trixie and in the process somehow acquired a large sum of bits." She then reached under the table and pulled out a black shirt and said flatly, “And then there is this. Please tell me I never wore this ugly… thing.”

Rainbow read its text out loud in surprise, "Freddy Fazbears Pizzeria Security? That's weird, I found a shirt like this at home, too.”

Applejack, Pinkie and Fluttershy chimed in and revealed that they, too, had shirts like this. It looked like they all had gone to that particular place, that they had never heard of before.

"Well, I don't have one of those," Twilight noticed.

"Are ya sure there, Twi?" Applejack asked.

"Somewhat, I didn't notice anything like it when I woke up, although it’s possible I overlooked it or Trixie threw it away or something. Ugh I don't know, how did we even get that drunk in the first place?"

Rainbow Dash laughed, "Oh yeah now I remember! That was too good," and fell on the floor holding her sides. "Augh my ribs!"

"Care to share, sugarcube?" Applejack asked, watching Rainbow Dash laughing on the floor.

Rainbow calmed down after a while and managed to get back up on her chair. "Whew, okay, it went like this," Rainbow related.


The Pint Noir 9:30 pm

The Pint Noir, Ponyville's cozy little hangout where adults come to drink and relax after a long day of work. It’s a small but successful business that’s owned by none other than the town drunkard herself, Berry Punch. She also has a masters degree in business, who knew?

With her friend and old drinking buddy Vinyl Scratch playing music in the background, The Pint Noir also became a hotspot for young singles. Later at night and on weekends when the usual patrons have long gone, singles come to meet and that night was no exception. Twilight Sparkle and the girls had gathered around a table and were drinking various alcoholic beverages, including Fluttershy.

"Alright girls," Rainbow Dash spoke up with a mischievous smirk, "Lets play a game.”

The girls looked at each other, looking for mutual approval, then turned their attention back to Rainbow.

"Hmm, what kinda game are we talkin’ about here Rainbow?" Applejack wanted to know.

"Oh boy! I don’t care! I love all games! What's it called?" Pinkie pressed Rainbow excitedly.

"Its called ‘I never’ and the rules are simple. We'll each start a sentence with I never, like, for example, ‘I never lost a race.' Now, if I ever lost a race, which I haven't, I would take a shot of this vodka I have right here."

"Wait, what about that time when you and Applejack both placed last during the Running of the Leaves a few years ago?" Twilight asked.

Rainbow Dash looked around nervously, "I uh… I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You and Applejack were competing to see who’s the most athletic."

"Nope, still have no idea what you’re getting at Twilight."

"I placed fifth just by trotting. How can you not remember that?"

"Are you sure that was me? ‘Cause I don't remember that."

Twilight groaned and threw her hooves up in defeat. “Ugh, never mind…”

"So, are you guys in? Or are you all scared?" Rainbow teased the others.

They had already made their choice. ”We're in," they said in unison.

Ten minutes later.

"I—I—I’ve never clopped during class," Rarity said and took a shot.

Not long and the girls had passed the point of having a good buzz and became full-blown drunk.

"Rarity—Rarity you're—you're drunk, giv—hic give me your gl—hic—ass," Twilight hiccoughed.

”I—I’m not Twilight drunk," Rarity muttered and passed out, head resting on the table.

Scratch that, the girls were completely wasted.

"Who saaaaaaid that?" Pinkie wondered, looking around. "Somepony said we—we wasted…," she began, but laughed hysterically before passing out, her head hitting the table with a resounding THUD.

"Ya'll can’t handle ya'll’s… Celestia is it hot in here," Applejack stammered, "He—Hey, we're ponies."


"Yep, good times," Rainbow Dash said with a smile.

Rarity covered her muzzle with a hoof, "I can’t believe I admitted to clopping. How embarrassing and unladylike."

"What are you talking about?" Fluttershy asked visibly puzzled. "Everypony clops," she said and rapped her hoof on the ground, producing a loud CLOP. "See?"

"Anyway," Twilight brought them back on topic, "What happened next?"

"I don't know," Rainbow Dash said with a shrug, "That's all I can remember."

The purple pony got up and paced around, trying to come up with a plan on what to do now. If only some pony had seen what they had done at the Pint Noir, she thought, then maybe they could get a clue what happened last night. Twilight got an idea and facehooved from the realization how easy it all was. “That's it! It’s so simple, why didn’t I think of it sooner?"

"What is it sugarcube?" Applejack asked.

Twilight pulled Applejack’s face close to her and stared her in the eyes, "We'll retrace our steps, starting with Pint Noir! Somepony we know must have seen us there…"

"…and could probably tell us what happened after that,” Rarity finished Twilight’s thought. ”You really are a genius!"

Twilight let go of Applejack’s face and rubbed her own chest in pride, "I am a genius, aren't I? Come on girls! Lets go!"

"Wait! What about Trixie?" Fluttershy interjected.

"I'll deal with her later." Twilight motioned for her friends to follow, "Now lets go!"


Meanwhile, back at Twilight Sparkle's house, Spike was washing the dishes.

"Man, Trixie sure knows how to make a mean pancake, I wonder where she learned that?"

He had just finished his sentence when the front door flew open and a cloud of white smoke filled the entrance.

A sky-blue unicorn bearing two saddlebags full of food burst through the smoke and declared pompously, "Now introducing her glorious return from the market, THE GREAT AND POWERFUL WIFE OR HUSBAND OR WHATEVER TWILIGHT TRIXIE!"

"Ya know, you don't have do that every time you come in here," Spike deadpanned, "And Twilight Trixie, seriously? Wouldn't it be Trixie Sparkle?" He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "But then again, Twilight's mother’s name is Twilight Velvet, so shouldn't we just call her Sparkle instead? Oh whatever.”

Trixie wandered into the kitchen, sat the saddlebags on the floor and replied, "Whatever. Did you enjoy the pancakes this morning?"

"Yes I did! They were so so perfect," Spike said dreamy and put off washing the dishes to help Trixie put away the groceries. "By the way, where did you learn to cook like that?"

"I picked it up during my travels," Trixie explained, "There wasn’t always a town nearby and I had to either learn to cook or learn to starve and starving sucked so I learned to cook." She scanned the room and noticed that at least one purple unicorn was missing. "Where's Twilight?” She asked Spike.

"Eh, she went out to find out about last night," he said.

Trixie giggled and shook her head, "Last night? Trixie knows what Twilight and her friends did, although Trixie may not know what happened before Freddy's Fazbears Pizzeria, but I do know what happened after."

"Oooh what happened?" Spike asked curios.

Trixie took a seat near the dining room table. "Well, after finding Twilight and her friends and getting rid of Twilight's vomit stained shirt, the Great and Powerful Trixie decided to help them return home."

At The Pint Noir

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Twilight and her friends stood in front of a medium-sized building, looking up in anticipation. They had no idea what to expect once they entered the building, but were determined to find out what happened last night.

“Well, here we are, girls," Twilight said, watching the building intently, "Pint Noir."

Applejack looked at Twilight who was still focusing on the building and said, "Ah thought it was called The Pint Noir?"

"Uh, isn't that the same thing?" Rainbow Dash asked, glancing over to Applejack.

"Well its not really the same thing,” Applejack replied, "All that's missing is the, well, uh, 'The' part."

"Well duh! Because calling it The Pint Noir all the time is just a mouth full."

Pinkie Pie stepped between them with the wide grin she usually has, "Pint Noir sounds like somepony's name!”

"Uhm, it was Berry Punch's original name before she changed it," Fluttershy stated meekly, earning her all her friends undivided attention.

"How do you know that, Fluttershy?" Rarity questioned.

"Well, you see, when she's not drunk you can have quite a pleasant conversation with her."

Applejack cleared her throat, all attention switched back to her. "Look, all ahm sayin’ is that we should call it The Pint Noir. Look, it even says so on the building." She pointed up at the building’s sign to prove her point.

"So what do you want? A frickin’ medal?" Rainbow asked her, annoyed by all the nitpicking.

Twilight interrupted before things got out of hoof, "Girls, can we please get back on track here? Look, we are at Pint Noir or The Pint Noir or whatever, so let’s just go inside already, sheesh!" Twilight barged past her friends and entered the Pint Noir with them in tow.

"…and ah still say we should call it The Pint Noir," Applejack muttered before following her friends.

They entered the Pint Noir and stopped dead in their tracks.

"W—What happened here?" Twilight gasped as she and the girls took in the Pint Noir’s interior.
What was perhaps once a great club now laid in shambles. Tables and chairs were all over the place and empty cups and broken bottles were scattered on the ground. The only things left standing were two bar stools, that were currently in use by two very familiar musicians, and a heavily scuffed table in between.

"Honestly, Vinyl, how long do you intend to sit there and mope?" Octavia asked, rolling her eyes.

The Wub Queen of the nightlife, Vinyl Scratch, had her head lying on the table and a glass of scotch in her hoof. "Why Tavi?" She asked and looked Octavia in the eyes. "Why?" She repeated in a heartbroken voice.

"Vinyl, seriously, its not that big of a deal," Octavia said and patted Vinyl on the back.

"Um, excuse me?" Fluttershy asked timidly, alerting the two ponies to the friends’ presence and making them turn around. "We, um, we are looking for Berry Punch, do you know where we could find her? Also, what happened here?"

Vinyl Scratch perked up a little. "Oh snap! Twilight and Co.! Man, you guys sure know how to party! Especially you, Twilight."

For some reason Twilight didn't like the way that sounded.

"You had me dying last night," Vinyl continued, "Especially when you—"

"VINYL, SHUSH," Octavia commanded with a stern look.

Vinyl pouted and crossed her hooves in protest, "Well it was loads better than what you did last night!" She turned her head and stuck her nose in the air in an insulted manner.

"Uh, are you two fighting about something?" Rainbow Dash questioned

Octavia bit her lower lip. Vinyl turned back to her earth pony friend, "Go ahead Tavi, tell them."

"I don't know if I should. It’s very personal, Vinyl," she replied.

"Either you tell them or I will."

Octavia slammed her hoof on the table. "Fine! Damn it!" she took a deep breath, grabbed Vinyl's drink, gulped it down and whispered, just on the edge of hearing, "I slept with Lyra Heartstrings."

Fluttershy gasped in shock and reared back. Her friends were startled by her reaction and had to make space, they looked at her in confusion, then back at Octavia.

"Could you say that again," Rainbow Dash asked and scooted closer. "We didn't quite catch that."

"I Slept With Lyra Heartstrings," she whispered again.

"Huh?"

Suddenly Octavia yelled as loud as she could, "I SLEPT WITH LYRA HEARTSTRINGS, OKAY?"

The main six could hardly believe their ears.

"You slept with Lyra?!" Pinkie Pie asked panicked, rushed over to her and took hold of Octavia’s head. "No! No no no no no no no no no NO! Octavia, do you have any idea what you've done?!"

"May or may not had sex with Lyra?" She said shrugging her shoulders.

The pink pony let go of her. "Well there's that," she said, then took hold of Octavia's head again, "But you've disrupted the OTP!"

"The what?" Octavia replied confused.

"Octavia, listen to me," Pinkie Pie said, still holding on to her, "Long long ago, back when friendship lessons were a thing and the, quote, Love and Tolerate actually meant something, a group of divine beings saw the minty unicorn sitting funny on a bench and took a shine to her. They gave her a funny personality and a weird obsession involving whomans or some crap, but something was missing. A sane mare to balance out Lyra's quirky lifestyle. So they searched for a mare that she could drive nuts but who would never leave her, and thus Bon Bon was found. She was meant to be the counter-balance to Lyra, so they shipped them because it was hawt or something, but from that moment on, Lyra always had to end up with Bon Bon, for it was written in the book of headcannons." Pinkie Pie looked up and said with a determined finality, "This is the Prophecy."

Octavia pushed Pinkie off of her. "Pinkie that's ridiculous!"

"What will your fans say, Octavia? Just think about all the hard work they put into those OctaScratch fanfics," Pinkie said, looking crestfallen, "They will be so disappointed in you."

"Can we just move on please?" Octavia begged. "I was drunk and I don’t know what happened last night!"

"Well at least you didn't end up with a wife, like Twilight over here," Rainbow Dash said, shooting Twilight an amused look.

Twilight sighed, "Look, do either of you know what happened here last night? Why is this place such a mess?"

"Oh, that's because of the massive fight you guys started last night," Vinyl said and looked around the room.

"Ah beg yer pardon?" Applejack asked.

"Alright, it went down like this…," Vinyl said and poured herself another glass of Scotch.


The Pint Noir 10:15 pm

"AWWWWW YEAH! ITS TEN FIFTEEN AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS… RAP BATTLE!" Vinyl raised her hooves in the air, causing the crowd to scream and roar in ecstasy. "INTRODUCING THE CHAMPION! RHYME THYME!"

A single brown earth pony stallion stood in the middle of an arena, basking in the crowd’s applause.

Vinyl continued, "NOW WE HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR TONIGHT FOLKS! I NEVER THOUGHT THAT THIS PONY WOULD EVER PARTAKE IN A RAP BATTLE, BUT HERE SHE IS! THE ONE THE ONLY TWIIIILIIIIGHT SPARKLEEEE!”

Twilight Sparkle stood on the other side of the arena, opposite to Rhyme Rhyme, occasionally wobbling with a drunken smile on her face. Boy, was she wasted.

"OK NOW, I WANT A GOOD CLEAN FIGHT! LET’S GET IT ON!" Vinyl hit a bell and the battle began.

"Alright,” Rhyme Thyme said,“ since you're the challenger I'll be a sport and let you go first and because you’re completely wasted this should be an easy victory for me."

"Oh, s—s—so you think you superpony, huh? I'll show you how superpony gets down." Twilight stepped forward.

“Where yo heart at? Where yo heart at?

Let me take that, let me give that back, let me deepthroat that

Let me go down smell dat ballsack

Oooooh that shit stinks.

Watch me put in work with my twerk baby!”

Twilight started twerking her flank at the crowd and they went wild. She finished with a powerful pelvic thrust that knocked all the stallions, and some mares, flat on the ground.

"OHHH! SHE SAID YO BALLSACK STINKS," Vinyl yelled in the microphone, laughing hysterically, "OH I KNOW YOU AINT GONNA TAKE THAT!"


Rainbow Dash rolled on the floor in laughter, "Oh man! I regret being drunk and missing that! Oh oh my ribs!” She laughed and laughed, at a complete loss of control, “I cant breathe! I cant breathe! Somepony help me!"

Pinkie sprang to the rescue and tried to calm her down, "Don't worry, Dashie! I got you," and added, "Yeah, the element of laughter is trying to stop somepony from laughing. Ironic, isn't it?"

Rarity was shocked. "Honestly, Twilight," she said, "I never would have imagined that you’d smell some stallions… er… ballsack."

"She didn't really go and smell it, you know," Vinyl reassured.

Twilight still sat on her flank and hid her from embarrassment reddened face behind her hooves..

Applejack shook her head, "Just when you think you know somepony…"

"Just skip to the fight, please," Twilight muttered behind her hooves.

"The fight? Oh right, the fight, aw man!" Vinyl clopped her hooves together in excitement. "That was something…"


The Pint Noir 10:25 pm

Some stallion yelled at Twilight, "HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOIN’ WITH MY GIRL?"

Twilight wrapped her hoof around the mare and pulled her closer, "Hey man she didn't want to be with your lame ass anymore so she came to me."

"I just wanted to know where the restrooms are," The mare interjected, looking rather unconformable.

"Don't worry baby y—you're with me now," she slurred and kissed the mare on the lips, slipping her some tongue.

The stallion held out his hoof to his wing-stallion. "C'mon with it!" His friend sprinkled some baby powder on his hoof. He cocked back his hoof and swung at Twilight, but she managed to dodge it, making him hit Fluttershy instead.

Fluttershy recovered quickly, yelled, "Oh you did not just—" And tackled the stallion into a nearby table, sending everything on it flying off. One of the beer bottles hit another patron in the head.


“And things just got worse from there,” Vinyl finished the story.

"Oh dear," Fluttershy muttered and effectively mirrored Twilight’s pose of shame.

Vinyl leaned on her hoof and thought about last night’s events at the Pint Noir once more, making her sigh. "Yeah that was a good time, but in all seriousness though—you guys should probably leave before Berry gets back. She will not be happy to see the six of you."

"That's probably a good idea," Twilight said a little too quickly, "Did we say anything else about where we was going next?"

The Wub Queen scratched her blue mane and thought long and hard about what happened after the fight. "Well, you guys said something about saving Fluttershy's baby brother from the clutches of the Goblin King and then left pretty fast."

"Well, thank you for all the help, gotta go, bye!" Twilight said quickly, enveloped her friends in a magical aura and left The Pint Noir with them floating behind her, leaving Vinyl Scratch and Octavia all alone again.

"Shoot," Octavia exclaimed, "We forgot to give Twilight her wedding gift."

I know what you did last night

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Meanwhile back at Twilight's, and Trixie's house. The light blue unicorn in question had just finished her story about Twilight's and her friends wild night.

"And that's what happened. Quite an interesting night it was." Trixie finished sighing in remembrance.

Spike on the other hand was laughing his tail off. "So that's how you and Twilight got married?!" he pounds his hand on the table still laughing hysterically. "Oh man, when she finds out what she and her friends did,"

"I just hope that Princess Celestia isn't too hard on her," Trixie replied rubbing the back of her mane sheepishly. "Anyway, what about you Spike?"

The purple dragon laughter slowly dies down as he looked towards Trixie with a hint confusion. "Huh? what about me?" he asked wiping some loose tears from his face.

Trixie nervously shifts in her seat. "Well, what Trixie meant to say is that you don't have a problem with Trixie being Twilight's wife or husband or whatever do you? Because you just seemed to not care this morning,"

"That's because I don't care. When you wake me up at 5:45 in the morning to tell me that you just got hitched, I'll say anything to get back to sleep," Spike hops off the table and makes his way back to the sink to finish the morning dishes. "That, and the fact that you can make some good pancakes. Twilight really enjoyed them you know,"

Although Spike couldn't see it, Trixie had a very light blush on her cheeks. "I wonder what's she doing right now?" Trixie asked glancing out the window. "I wonder if she's thinking about me?"

"Trixie, first pony or third pony. Secondly, she probably found out a clue about her night and is probably trying to fix it as we speak before it gets worse."


"Guys, we need to fix this before it gets worse!" Twilight said in a frenzy.

They were currently sitting outside of Sweet Apple Acres waiting for Applejack who was checking up on her younger sister Apple Bloom. The event at The Pint Noir had the poor purple pony Twilight Sparkle nervous that she and her friends may had possibly done more than just have a couple of drinks last night.

"And how do you propose we do that genius?" Rainbow said in a mocking tone. "We have absolutely no idea what happened or what we did after Pint Noir except that we went on a quest to save Fluttershy's non-existent baby brother from the clutches of the Goblin King,"

"That would make a great movie," Fluttershy quietly added. "If I had a baby brother,"

"Rainbow's right Twilight darling," Rarity said laying on her portable couch. "We don't have any other clues other than that,"

Pinkie suddenly hops in-between her friends looking around in the sky like something was about to fall from it. "Oh No! Guys TWITCHIE TAIL!!"

The girls instantly took cover underneath Rarity's couch trying to look up at the sky for any sign of danger.

Meanwhile in Apple Bloom's room. Applejack was sitting on a chair next to her younger sisters bed while Apple Bloom was laying down.

"Now Apple Bloom me and ta girls may be gone fer a while so ah have Big Mac and granny watching you till ah get back," Applejack replied gently rubbing Apple Bloom's mane.

"Okay, but ah really need ya here sis," Apple Bloom gently rubs her stomach. "How long will ya be gone?"

"Well ya know Twi," Applejack said chuckling. "She wont rest till she finds out what happened and to be honest, Ah'm a little curious myself,"

Apple Bloom allows a small chuckle herself. "That's why you're the element of honesty,"

Before Applejack say anything a large crashing sound interrupted Applejack's and Apple Bloom's discussion causing both of them to investigate.

"WHAT THE HAY IS GOIN ON OUT HERE!" Applejack yelled.

"MAAAIIIILLL CALLLLL!"

Apple Bloom and Applejack look up to see that the mail mare Derpy Hooves had crashed on the roof of their patio, again. "Ooops sorry about that Applejack," she reaches into her pouch and pulls out a small letter. "Letter for you!" she said in a singsong tone. Applejack takes the letter while leaving Derpy to get herself unstuck.

"Who's it from Applejack?" Apple Bloom asked trying to glance at the letter. "Who's it from?"

Applejack gently pushes her sister's head away. "Well ah would tell ya but yer head's in the way." she turns it over to the front where a familiar name was on it. "Well looky here!" Applejack said with a smile on her face. "Its from cousin Babs," Applejack opens the letter and begins to read while Twilight and the girls exited from under Rarity's couch.

"I-is it safe now?" Rainbow Dash fearfully asked.

"Its safe now," Apple Bloom replied. "Ms. Hooves just crashed landed on the patio roof again," Derpy Hooves smiles and waves to the girls while trying to get herself unstuck.

The girls all breathe a sigh of relief and exit from under the couch. "Whew, Twitchie Tails are always so nerve racking," Rarity complained striating out her mane. "Augh! I got dirt on me!" she dusts the dirt off while the girls make their way over to Apple Bloom.

"Hello Apple Bloom," Fluttershy said gently. "How are you this fine day?"

The yellow filly smiles and a hoof on her stomach. "We've been better," she looks down sadly for a moment before looking back up. "Hey, uh, Rainbow Dash?"

"Yeah Bloomster?" Rainbow said. She knew exactly what Apple Bloom was going to ask her. It was the same question every time Rainbow saw her.

"H-have you talked to Scootaloo, by any chance?"

And every time it would be the same answer.

"N-no Apple Bloom, I haven't,"

And every time the exact same thing would happen.

"O-Oh, well then, If you do see her, t-tell her," Apple Bloom doesn't even finish her sentence as she walks back into the house in tears.

Fluttershy sighs sadly as she saw Apple Bloom disappear into the house. "Oh poor girl, I wish there was something we could do,"

Pinkie face falls into a small frown. "I tried that with one of my forgive each other parties, but that just made things worse. This is one of those things that they just have to work out on their own,"

"Wow Pinkie," Twilight said surprised. "That's very mature of you,"

"Why thank you Twilight," the pink pony replied smiling, but raises her eyebrow in realization. "Hey! What's that supposed to mean!?"

Applejack clears her throat gaining her friends attention. "Uh, girls we have a problem,"

"Hm? What's the matter darling?" Rarity asked.

"Uh, well, uh," Applejack takes off her hat. "Well, uh, ah don't know how to put this, so, apparently Ah've been informed that we went to jail last night."

Fluttershy hangs her head down. "Oh dear,"

"Meh," was all that Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie could say shrugging in unison.

But for Rarity and Twilight however, they took it as well as you think.

"JAIL?! WE WENT TO JAIL!? OH WHAT WILL PRINCESS CELESTIA SAY WHEN SHE FINDS OUT ABOUT THIS!"

"A DELICATE PONY LIKE ME WONT LAST ONE NIGHT IN JAIL!"

"WHAT WILL MY PARENTS SAY?! *GASP* WHAT IF THEY ALREADY KNOW?! WHAT IF MY BROTHER KNOWS?!"

"THEY'LL EAT ME LIKE A MARSHMALLOW IN JAIL GIRLS!"

"I'M A CRIMINAL! A BAD GIRL UNWORTHY OF BEING PRINCESS CELESTIA'S FAITHFUL STUDENT!"

"I CANT WEAR ORANGE JUMPSUITS! IT CLASHES!"

Applejack puts her hooves in their mouths shutting them up. "Girls, calm down, Now Ahm sure there is a perfectly good explanation for this. Look, how about we go see mah cousin and set the record straight, okay?"

Rarity and Twilight quickly nod their heads. "Good, now lets all meet at the train station in ten minutes."

Rainbow and Pinkie leaped in the air and said in perfect unison. "Aww Yeah! ROAD TRIP!"

In Manehatten

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Twilight and her friends stood at the train station waiting for the next train to Manehatten. After their short ten minute departure from Sweet Apple Acres. The girls decided to stop by their homes for some last minute preparations before they began their journey.

"Ok girls," Twilight said pacing back and forth on the platform. "Has everypony taken care of their previous arrangements before we go on this trip?"

Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and Fluttershy all nod their heads. Twilight squints her eyes, a certain blue colored rainbow maned pegasus was missing. "Hey, has anypony seen Rainbow Dash?"

"Did somepony say my name?" Twilight and the girls look up where Rainbow Dash was descending from the sky. She lands in front of Twilight with a pose.

"And just where have you been?" Twilight scolded. "We've been waiting here for-" she stole a quick look at the clock to see just how long they had been waiting. "Eleven whole minutes! What were you doing?!"

"Chill Twilight, If you must know I was at home when I had a uh slight problem," Rainbow said look around.

"What was so important that you had to be an entire minute late?!" Twilight asked getting in Rainbow's face.

"Well,"


In Rainbow Dash's spectacular cloud home (Which you can own for your very own home for the low price of $29.99! Get it now while supplies last! Rainbow Dash and Tank the Tortoise each sold separately!) the blue pegasus in question was currently in her master bathroom. She had no idea how she missed this this morning when she woke up, probably because she didn't have to go at the time or probably because she had five other bathrooms in her wonderfully detailed cloud castle home that every child must own.

She sat speechless at the sight before her, never in all her life had she encountered a sight such as this. She thought that either something happened while she was away or some higher power decided to ruin her day, again, like that one time she caught Granny Smith wearing a thong.

Because sitting where her thinking mare's throne should be, stood a hippopotamus head.


Yes you read that right a giant hippopotamus head.

Rainbow Dash had been staring at this hippo's head for Celestia knows how long and she needed to go, but the hippo just glared back and spoke with a deep and threating tone.

"If you go in me, you die,"

Now normally this would make a normal pony spazz out and leave the scene as quickly as one entered, but not for Rainbow Dash who had a twisted grin on her face.

"Well then, I hope you're thirsty big boy," She trots over to the hippopotamus head who's eyes widen in fear. Perhaps making a threat when you have no way to actually do anything to defend yourself was a bad idea.

"Uh, wait cant we talk about this?! No! Stay back! No! Noo!NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Talking Hippopotamus head sold separately


"And that's what took me so long," Rainbow finished while the rest of the girls looked at her with disbelief. "What?"

Fluttershy steps up glaring at Rainbow Dash. "Why would you do that to that poor sweet hippopotamus Rainbow?" she steps closer making Rainbow take a step back. "You know how I feel when ponies mistreat animals!"

Rainbow Dash looks around hoping for a distraction of some kind so that she could get herself out of this predicament that she has so foolishly put herself in. She silently prayed that something would happen, like their train departing.

"ALLL ABOARD! TRAIN TO MANEHATTEN! ALLLL ABOARD!!"

Rainbow took a silent breath of relief. Perhaps telling Fluttershy what she did that to that hippo was not one of her better ideas, it was almost as bad as the time they went to amateur poetry night at The Pint Noir a few months ago.


Twilight, Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and Rainbow Dash were gathered around a table with some drinks. They had heard that Berry Punch had decided to do a amateur poetry night an a attempt to draw in potential customers, so far it looked to be a successful night full of young inspiring writers.

"This had better be worth it," grumbled Rainbow as she looked around the club.

"Aww come on Dashie!" Pinkie said cheerfully. "We never get to hang out as much as friends anymore, and look! We even got Twilight to leave the her house!"

Twilight just continues to sit in her chair pouting with her forelegs folded.

"And look how relaxed Applejack is!" Pinkie continued looking over towards Applejack who just finished her third glass of very hard apple cider.

"RUBY! ANOTHER GLASS!" Applejack shouted waving her empty glass in the air.

Rarity sips her own drink before sitting down on the table. "Honestly Applejack, just because Apple Bloom is eight months pregnant doesn't mean you have to drink yourself stupid,"

Berry Punch's only daughter Ruby Pinch came over to the table with another pitcher of hard apple cider. "Here you go Miss Applejack," she begins to pour Applejack another glass but the farmer stops her.

"Leave the pitcher,"

Ruby smiles and sits the pitcher of very hard apple cider on the table and walks back to the bar. Applejack takes the pitcher and pours herself a glass, then proceeded to drink straight from the pitcher.

"I'll admit that Applejack is more relaxed then what she has been these last couple of months," Fluttershy said.

The lights dim down and a spotlight shines on center stage where Berry Punch was standing. "Stallions and Mares, thank you for coming out to our very first amateur poetry night here at The Pint Noir, I know all you young writers are very anxious to get started, so lets begin with our first writer."

The crowd begins to lightly applaud the young stallion as he took center stage. "Ahem, this poem goes out to a very special mare,"

"Aww, isn't that sweet?" Fluttershy cooed before the stallion began to speak.

"I met a mare who made me happy
But today I found out I have the clappy
And now it burns when I pee
Cause all you gave me was an STD
Thank you."

The stallion takes a bow leaving the stage with the crowd lightly applauding him on his way back to his table while Twilight and her friends just sat there speechless.

"So," Rarity said trying to break the silence between her friends. "That was a thing,"


"RAINBOW DASH!" Twilight yelled

Rainbow shakes her head pushing the memory away. "Huh?!" she saw the her friends was already on the train.

"ARE YOU GETTING ON OR NOT?!"

Meanwhile back at Twilight's and Trixie's house. The light blue magician was sitting on the couch angrily pouting about what transpired five minutes ago.

"Stupid Twilight!" Trixie muttered angrily.

Spike enters the front with his arms crossed. "Are you still upset about that?"

"YES I AM!" Trixie shouted. "I mean, its like she didn't even hear a single word I said! And after I slaved over a hot stove to make those pancakes! I cook, I clean, I even give her a belly rub while reading her a bedtime story! But what does she do? Goes and hangs out with her friends over something that only THE GREAT AND POWERFUL WIFE OR HUSBAND OR WHATEVER TWILIGHT TRIXE LULAMOON KNOWS!"

"Welcome to marriage Trixie, it will be a long one no doubt," deadpanned Spike. "Anyway, I'm heading over to Barnyard Bargains, we're out of ink and Twilight could use some new quills," Spike walks over to the front door before Trixie stops him.

"I shall accompany you Spike," Trixie said with a smile. "Oooh! maybe we can talk about stuff and maybe do a little bonding on the way there-"

"Riiiight, thanks but no thanks Trixie, I got this," Spike opens the door while Trixie continues to talk.

"-And maybe stop and get some ice cream on the way back home and-" Spike stops walking a turns around with the biggest smile on his face.

"Hey Trixie, do you want to go to Barnyard Bargains with me?" Trixie stops rambling to herself and gives Spike a smile. "Sure Spike! It'll be fun! Lets go,"

Spike and Trixie leave the house to go shopping and maybe do a little stepmother and son, or stepfather and son bonding on the way to Barnyard Bargains on what will be a great day for the both of them.

"Hey Trixie, when we stop by the ice cream shop can I get two scoops?" Spike asked with a hopeful smile.

"Of course Spike," Trixie said smiling back

"Bully!"

Yep, a very great day indeed.


Fifteen minutes later. Twilight and the girls reached the city know as Manehatten, the city that never sleeps and the place where the girls apparently spent some time in jail. They exited the train where a filly with a brown coat and a ginger red mane was standing on the platform.

"Howdy cuz," Babs Seed greeted.

Applejack quickly rushes over to her young cousin. "Well howdy there cousin Babs, guys, this is mah cousin Babs Seed."

"Yeah, I think we got it the first time," Rainbow muttered.

Twilight barges in front of Applejack and looks at Babs with a serious look, "Ok, in your letter you wrote that we were in jail, do you know how? And more importantly who saw us?

"Well that's easy lady, do any of yous know a uh, shoot what was his name again?" Babs pats her chin thinking. "Oh right, does anypony here know a Flash Sentry? He's the one who yas in the slammer."

While Trixie is in Ponyville

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It was a sunny afternoon in the small rural town known as Ponyville. Princess Celestia's sun was high in the sky providing light and warmth for citizens of Equestria, even for Spike and Ponyville's newest resident Twilight Trixie Lulamoon who were on their way to Barnyard Bargains.

"Isn't today a nice day Trixie?" Spike asked while riding on her back. "Its nice to have somepony who willingly leaves the house, I have to force Twilight to go outside or when something terrible happens to Ponyville."

Trixie continues to walk forward lost in thought with a sullen look on her face.

"Trixie?" Spike asks concerned. "Trixie what's the matter? Are you still thinking about what happened?"

The light blue magician sighs sadly. "I just don't know Spike, I mean, I know we're both new to this whole marriage thing but at least she could've heard me out, We still don't even know who's who yet, its like she wont even compromise with me, Ohh did I do something wrong? Maybe I should have gave her a kiss and told her I love her before she left," Trixie kicks some rocks in frustration. "Some wife I turned out to be,"

"Oh so did you finally decide to be the wife?" Spike asks

"I sure feel like one," Trixie responded bitterly. "Overworked and underappreciated,"

Spike shifts uncomfortably on Trixie's back, she sounded very upset that Twilight would rather go on a adventure with her friends to find out how she and Trixie got married than listen to Trixie's side of the story. And even when Trixie told or in her case tried to tell Twilight what happened, Twilight just sort of ignored her and told her to stay out of trouble.

"Aw, don't feel like that Trixie," Spike said trying to cheer her up. "But to be fair, you two have not even been married for a day and Twilight was wasted so it going to take her some time before she wises up,"

"You really think so?" Trixie asked looking back at the purple dragon.

"I know so, Twilight has always had a problem with things she's not prepared for, oh boy you should have her when she tried to make some friends," Spike and Trixie stop in front for a very large building with many residents both entering and exiting with bags of various items. "Well here we are Barnyard Bargains, the number one spot for all your daily needs,"

Trixie stares up in awe, she never would have thought that a building of this size would exist in Ponyville, she had seen buildings like this during her travels but one in the town of Ponyville? This required a closer approach and she was of need some new capes and hats.

A large smile replaced Trixie's frown. "Heey Spike, are you pondering what I'm pondering?" Spike looks at her not really understanding where exactly she was going with this, he wasn't a mind reader you know.

"Umm, If your pondering what I'm pondering then you shouldn't have to ponder what I'm pondering because your pondering is correct with my pondering," Spike thinks about what he said for a second before speaking again. "I think?"

Trixie slowly turns around and looks at Spike with her mouth slightly agape. "What? Whatever, lets just have the stupid shopping spree,"

"Oh, well why didn't you just say so?" Spike said.

Spike and Trixie quickly rush inside Barnyard Bargains bypassing all the other shoppers. They stopped by the jewelry department then the clothing department.

"Hey Trixie," Spike called out. "What do you think of this white fur coat with this hat? Look, it even has a feather in it."

"Hmm, its missing something, I got it!" Trixie levitates a gold chain and put it around his neck. " There we go,"

While Spike goes off to find a mirror so he could admire himself, Trixie wonders to the sexy lingerie glancing at the many types of socks and panties on display. She picks up a pair of striped purple socks and looks them over.

"Hmm,"


It was a beautiful night in Ponyville as Celestia's sun set to make way for Luna's moon that indicated the end of the day. A cold frigid air blew across the night sky and many took retired into their homes for the night. The perfect night to sit by the fireplace with a good book.

Like our residential librarian Twilight Sparkle who doing such an action.

"Man this book is terrible!" Twilight complained. "I wish I knew suggested me to read this so I could suggest some good romance novels," Twilight closes the book and tosses it in the fireplace. "If vamponies could sparkle in the sunlight we would be severely and royally boned, almost makes me ashamed of my name,"

Twilight feels somepony gently laying down on her back covering her eyes. "Guess whooo,"

"Oh? Now I wonder who could this possibly be?" Twilight said feigning ignorance. "Cause who ever she is, she smells quite nice,"

Trixie giggles while planting some light kisses on Twilight's neck. "That would be my new shampoo, so I take it you like?" Twilight moans lightly while Trixie starts suck on her neck.

"Trixie stop," Giggled Twilight. "You know I'm ticklish, and wearing those purple socks that I like so much? What's the occasion? Its not my birthday,"

"I thought that maybe you would like a little break," Trixie whispered. "So, want to go to bed and maybe write a new story?"

"Fine by me, you have a much better plot anyway," Twilight said.

Trixie smile falls a little. "A better what?"

"Uh, plot?" Twilight repeated unsurely.

"What does plot mean?" Trixie asked getting off Twilights back.

"Uh, according to young ponies today, plot is another word for flank, butt or ass," Twilight explained looking back at Trixie

Trixie just looks at the librarian confused. "Well why did you just say that?"

"Say what?" Twilight replied

"Flank, butt or ass. Because saying plot just sounds stupid," Trixie said. "Lets just say you're reading one of your books and you tell somepony that you love the plot, now lets switch plot for this new meaning of flank or ass and now some teenaged jackass is gonna start giggling like a horny schoolgirl," Trixie gasps and points a hoof a Twilight. "I get it now! You're saying I dont have a fat ass aren't you!"

"WHAT?!"

"Don't play coy with me Sparkle!" Twilight flinches at being called "Sparkle" a name Trixie reserved anytime Twilight was in trouble. "Everypony know that plots are big! Well I'm sorry that my PLOT isnt big enough for you, maybe you'll find a much bigger one in one of your books!" Trixie angrily turns around and leaves the room in a huff.

Twilight just stands there stupefied. "What just happened there?! If I ever find the pony came up with this I'm going to slap them with a dictionary!"


"Excuse me, Mrs. Trixie?"

Trixie shook her head from her daydream and quickly put the socks back down. She quickly turns around where a brown stallion was carrying some merchandise. Trixie smiles at the stallion who smiled back.

"Oh, Button Mash you startled me!" Trixie said patting her cheat. "What are you doing here?

"I work here," he replied. "I was on my way to do a bit of restocking when I saw you spaced out, thought I'd say hello,"

"You work here? I didn't know that," Trixie said

"Oh but of course! Rent and food aren't going to pay for themselves and Sweetie Belle does have expensive tastes, and speaking of tastes," Button glances at the nearest clock on the wall. "It time for lunch,"

"Lunch does sound nice Trixie," Spike said not looking back from the mirror.

To be honest Trixie was getting pretty hungry herself. They had been shopping at Barnyard Bargains for quite some time now and lunch does sound appealing right now.

"Hey Button, are there any food courts around here?" Trixie asks

"Of course! Follow me,"

They walk to another part of Barnyard Bargains that said Barnyard Bargains Food Court for all your eating needs! They walk inside where a pink earth pony wearing a weeine hat and a brown vest was busy behind the counter making food. Spike and Trixie take a seat while Button Mash walks up to the counter.

"Oh Diamond honey!" Button said leaning on the counter. "We have come for nourishment!"

Diamond Tiara looks back at the brown stallion clearly not amused. "You're getting off on this aren't you?" she notices Trixie siting on one of the tables. "Hey isn't she the one who woke all us up at 5:30 in the morning for her stupid wedding?"

"No, that was Princess Celestia" Button corrected. "I never saw her so annoyed in my life. Anyway where's Flitter and Cloudchaser?"

"They're in Manehatten," Diamond said turning back around. "They said something about Thunderlane getting assaulted last night," she exits behind the counter with two plates of food and sits them next to Trixie and Spike while Button Mash waits for his.

"Uhh Diamond?" Button asks. "Where's mine?"

Diamond Tiara leans on the counter in looks at the stallion with a wide grin. "Oh, its coming,"

For some reason, Button didn't like the way this was going, not one bit.

"OH BUTTON MASH!"

Button's ears droop downward, he finally understood where Diamond was going with this. "Ohh I hate you,"

"No you don't," Diamond replied still grinning.

Sweetie Belle embraces Button in a quick hug and a light peck on the lips. "I brought you lunch just like you asked, if Diamond hadn't relayed your message to me I never would have made it in time," Sweetie looks at Diamond in her work uniform. "Well don't you look cute Diamond, I love a mare in uniform you know,"

"Screw you," snapped Diamond.

"I love it when you get all prissy with me, it makes you look sexy, " she said winking at Diamond who just snorted angrily and went back to work. "Anyway here you go, Oh! hello Mrs. Trixie,"

Trixie just waves back while Sweetie Belle sits a lunch box down on one of the tables. "I made this just for you!" she opens it and a black very ugly dark splooge and you know what? I really cant describe what Sweetie Belle made, all I know is that is was horrible looking, actually horrible is putting it very lightly and I think it moved, and is it supposed to have that green glow and horrible smell?

"Mmm, it looks...delicious," Button squeezed out, "What is it?"

"A daisy sandwich," Sweetie said smiling.

Ok now, Button loved Sweetie very much, but the poor mare couldn't cook to save lives. In fact Sweetie Belle was such a horrible cook that one time she undercooked cereal. Yes undercooked cereal, how does one even do that? Also her cooking is so bad that not even stray animals or flies would eat it and pretty much avoid their house. And the trashponies would wear hazmat suits just to pick up the garbage every morning in its own special truck and taken to its own special dumping area. So of course Button Mash would take great lengths to avoid eating whatever horrible monstrosity Sweetie Belle made.

And this was one of those times. He needed to come up with a plan and fast. "Hey look! Is that Sapphire Shores I see?" Sweetie turns around giving Button the window of opportunity he needed, he grabs the dish and tosses it on the wall burning a small hole next to Diamond Tiara who just pushes something to cover it up.

"That wasn't Sapphire Shores Button," Sweetie said turning back around. "Your eyes need to be checked, anyway I must be off, Rarity left Opal with me while she's off in Manehatten and I just cleaned the house, and Scootaloo is just probably letting her tear up my bed again, so I'll see you at home Button," Sweetie kisses Button and heads to the entrance. "Hey Diamond, are you coming over tonight?"

"Sure why not," she replied not looking back. "I could use a little bit of unwinding since daddy forced me to get this stupid job,"

"Hey Sweetie Belle," Trixie said. "Did Rarity give you a reason for their trip to Manehattan?"

"Huh? Oh, she something about them going to jail last night," Sweetie rolls her eyes. "And she handling it as well as you would expect, now I must really be off, Scootaloo is probably letting that stupid cat tear up the house,"

"Bye Sweetie," waved Spike before going for another bite before stopping abruptly. "Wait, did she just say that they went to jail?"

"Oooooh! When Twilight comes back, she is getting such a scolding!" Trixie growled.

Ugh, What Happened Last Night Part 2 Manehatten Blues

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On the 24th of September a story was created about six super best friends getting drunk and not remember what they did. Of course many stories have this same concept but one author decided to do something different. Something fun.

And we're damn glad about their return.

How to get in the Featured Section build

Soul level...99
Heart...23
Attention Span...20
Flexibility...12
Grammar...16
Tryharding...18
Copycating...10 (But don't tell anyone you actually did that)
Poise...0 ( It doesn't do anything for you so don't bother)

What r u? A Tumblrtard? Shipping, shipping, shipping, become an unstoppable legend! What ideas do you have bitch? Well as long as you have a setting, character, and a decent plotline you'll have everything you could ever want! Or write a decent clopfic.

Use Trixie cane as it is still the best cane in the fandom.

Also don't forget your Ring of Hater Protection and Flamer Shield. Well what is it? Are we cool yet? Its time to write a masterpiece.


Twilight wipes the sweat off her forehead. Her hooves were shaking and her heart was racing as she looked at the bomb before her. She levitates the pliers closer to one of the many wires. "Red or blue?" she says to herself. "Or green and black?"

"Agent Twilight, come in! I repeat come in!"

The purple pony quickly responds to the call. "RAINBOW DASH! I'M A LITTLE BUSY RIGHT NOW!" Twilight takes a couple of deep breaths to calm her nerves. What kind of manic puts a bomb in a orphanage for adorable puppies and kittens? "Look, I'm sorry but I'm trying to defuse a bomb here!"

"...Are you still mad about drawing the shortest straw?"

"Oh very much so," Twilight looks down at the timer eyes widening with horror. "Oh no! I only have ten seconds left!" she refocuses on the bomb, puts the pliers on the blue wire preparing to cut. "Rainbow Dash?"

"Yes Twi?"

"...I love you," Twilight closes her eyes and cuts the blue wire.


And now back to your regularly scheduled story

Twilight was stunned at the name of Flash Sentry. "Flash Sentry?! Captain Flash Sentry of the Crystal Empire?! That Flash Sentry?!" when her older brother Shinning Armor and sister-in-law Princess Cadence had their first foal a few months ago. Shinning Armor resigned and named Flash Sentry as his successor while he became a family man. Flash was less serious than her brother but he could if needed.

"The very same," Babs confirmed.

Now Twilight was curious, what did they do that made Flash Sentry put them in jail. "Babs, do you know if he's still here in Manehattan?"

Babs looks around uncomfortably biting her lower lip. "Uh, ya mean ya don't remember what happened at Flash Sentry's party?"

The six friends shook their heads. Babs just stared blankly at Twilight and her friends until Applejack broke the silence. "Well it can be that bad could it?"

"I hope it wasn't from another fight," Fluttershy quietly said. Babs widen from surprise, another one? They had one before this one? Rainbow Dash notices this and facehoofs.

"And that's fight number two," she said nonchalantly. "So who is lucky victim number two?"

Babs opens her mouth to give an answer but was cut off by two pegasus ponies. "Boss Rainbow?" Rainbow Dash turns around surprised. Two ponies she hasn't seen in quite some time was walking towards her.

"Flitter, Cloudchaser? What are you two doing here? "Rainbow asked surprised. "I haven't seen you two in a while! I thought you two worked at Barnyard Bargains!"

"We do, but only part time though," Flitter said. "The employees discount is quite nice for our shopping sprees,"

"But what about Button? Does he know that you two are here?" Rarity asked.

Cloudchaser waves a hoof at her. "Psssh, Button is a cool boss he'll make do, but just to be on the safe side we told Diamond to tell him that we wouldn't be in today,"

"If its one pony who could butter him up its her," Flitter added. The rest of the group nod their heads except Babs who just looked on unaware of what they were talking about.

"Uh excuse me here but what are yas talkin about," Babs interrupted. "It thought that Button was dating Sweetie Belle?"

"He is," Fluttershy replied.

Now poor Babs was really confused. "But she made it sound like Diamond was dating him instead,"

"Well, you see Babs, Button, Sweetie and Diamond have a, uh...interesting relationship," Rarity commented.

"And by interesting, we mean he has two fillyfriends," Rainbow finished.

"RAINBOW!" Rarity yelled,

"What? Its not like its a secret or anything, everypony in Ponyville knows about it," Rainbow said shrugging. "Except Diamond's father."

Everypony just stands awkwardly looking around the train station. They really didn't understand how exactly Filthy Rich didn't see that his daughter was in some sort of relationship, if you could even call it that at this point. And its not like they're very secretive about it either, sometimes Button would be with Sweetie or Diamond, or both at the same time.

"Well I guess what cuz told me in her letters were true then," Babs sheepishly remarked. "Oh! How is she doin?"

"She's doin fine," Applejack said smiling. "Ta doctor said that the little one would be arriving any day now, we're throwing a big celebration for the new member to the family, Ah assume you'll be there?"

Babs nods her head eagerly. "Of course! I cant wait to see the little guy when he arrives,"

Twilight rolls her eyes in annoyance. She had to find Flash Sentry before he left town and tells her parents or worse, "Hey that's great and all but we HAVE to find Flash!" Twilight said getting topic back on track. "Do you know where he is?"

"Shucks, Ahm so glad Ah didn't wake up next to Twilight married," Applejack muttered.


In one of Manehatten's very fancy hotels, Captain Flash Sentry slept soundly in his king sized bed with a mare on each foreleg. After that wild party he and his three companions threw last night the young captain didn't want to awaken from his peaceful slumber. This was one of those moments that he was glad that Commander Shinning Armor gave him some time off duty.

And by give him some time off, I mean kicked him out. So with the entire night off he took his friends, Silver Hawk, Arrowhead, and Vic Viper and headed off to Manehatten to party, and the night was going well until Twilight and her friends showed up completely trashed.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Flash Sentry groggily opens his eyes, he looks at the mares that slept with him and smiles. He sits up and his face and ears dropped down.

Because there was a stallion dangerously close to his crotch. Like really close. Like so close that he could feel his breath, that close.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Ignoring the stallion groaning as he hopped off the bed, Flash slowly trots to the front door and opens it without looking through the eyehole.

A mistake that was about to cost him dearly as a very familiar purple unicorn mare stood in the doorway looking quite upset. "Hello Captain Flash Sentry, I think you and I need to talk,"

Flash Sentry doesn't say a word, all he does is slowly close the door and locks it as his three friends entered the front room yawning.

"Hey Cap, who was that knocking on the door like that THIS early?" asked Silver Hawk. "Was it housekeeping again? Although that maid was quite the cutie, I wish she could have stayed last night,"

Captain Sentry slowly turns around with a distraught look on his face. "Run, Twilight's here,"

"Huh?" they asked in unison

"I SAID RUN! TWILIGHT SPARKLE IS HERE!"

Hearing the name Twilight Sparkle caused all three of them to snap fully awake.

"Wait, Twilight Sparkle?! You mean Commander Armor's little sister and the one we got the cops on?! That Twilight Sparkle?!" asked Vic Viper.

"Well, she and her friends were quite unruly last night," added Arrowhead.

They can hear Twilight banging on the door again. Silver Hawk backs away from the door fearing she might break it down. "Well, I think she's mad."

"Quite mad." added Vic Viper

"What do we do Captain?" panicked Arrowhead.

Flash Sentry looks behind at the door, then at his friends, then back to the door again. "Men, I think now is a good time to PANIC!"

Uhh, About Last Night Twilight

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Silver Hawk, Vic Viper and Arrowhead watched with a hint of amusement as their captain ran around the room like a headless chicken. They had no idea why he was so panicky but it was sure amusing to watch. Vic Viper shakes his head slowly, it was a good thing that he came up with some options for just such an emergency.

"Arrowhead, get our guests outta here," commanded Vic Viper. "Before they get caught in the crossfire,"

Arrowhead closes his eyes as his horn lights up. "Done,"

Silver Hawk slaps his forehead sighing. "Shoot! I forgot to give my dates my mailing address!" Arrowhead and Vic Viper looks at him annoyed. "What? Have you two wrestled with a stallion while a mare plays referee? And yes things got sexy," Silver Hawk sighs happily. "Good times, good times, yep."

"Really Silver," Arrowhead deadpanned. "Both of them?"

Silver Hawk smirks and extends his wings. "You guys know that I really don't care if its a mare or stallion right? We had fun last night, and that's all that matters,"

Arrowhead and Vic Viper roll their eyes. "Right, anyway we should probably get Captain Sentry to calm down somehow," suggested Vic Viper.

"Right on it!" Silver Hawk steps out in front of the flailing Flash Sentry grabbing him by the face and pulling him in for a kiss. Arrowhead and Vic Viper are neither shocked or surprised as they just stood there. Flash Sentry pushes him off and furiously wipes his lips.

"Yeah, that's not what I meant but whatever, it worked," commented Vic Viper.

They all turn around to the door when Twilight's pounding on the door became even louder. "Captain this is ridiculous, why don't we just let them in and just explain the situation to them," suggested Arrowhead walking over to the door. "Look, Twilight is a reasonable mare I'm sure that-"

Arrowhead doesn't finish the rest of his sentence as a purple hoof broke through the door hitting the unsuspecting unicorn straight in the jaw. He flies back and land on the coffee table braking it, Flash Sentry, Silver Hawk and Vic Viper hurried over to the unconscious unicorn.

"Dammnnn you got knocked the fu-" Silver Hawk notices that Flash and Vic Viper glaring at him. "Uh, Nevermind,"

Flash sits Arrowhead up shaking awake him to no avail. "Damn it! He's out cold!"

"I'll go get some ice!" said Vic Viper heading into the kitchen.

"And I'll give him mouth to mouth," added Silver Hawk.

Flash Sentry looks over to Silver Hawk with a look of disapproval. "Silver, not the time or the place," Both turn back to the door where Twilight's hoof unlocked the door. She pulls her hoof back then busted through the door nostrils flaring with steam.

"Twilight, you just unlocked the door," Rarity said looking at the shattered door fragments. "We could've just, ya know, opened it,"

But Twilight didn't here a word she said, she only saw the quivering Captain of the Crystal Empire. Twilight makes her way to Flash Sentry who was too scared to move. "Perhaps I didn't make myself clear," she spoke with such serious that it reminded Flash Sentry of her brother. "We need to talk,"

Silver Hawk whistles. "I like her, she's feisty,"

Twilight and her friends took a seat while Flash Sentry got the still unconscious Arrowhead a pillow. "So you wish to know about last night?" Twilight and her friends all nod their heads. "Very well then," he sits down next to Vic Viper closing his eyes. "I just wanted to say congrats before we got started,"

"About what?" Twilight asked.

"About your marriage," Flash replied

"Oh yeah," Twilight leans her head on her hoof. "I hope Trixie is staying out of trouble,"


Meanwhile in Ponyville, Twilight Trixie Lulamoon was currently dodging fireballs. She was in the middle of battling a dangerous monster that came out the middle of nowhere, and since her wife or husband or whatever was still out of town it was up to her to pick up the slack.

"Lighting Dust, Blazer distract it!" she commanded.

The two pegasus ponies saluted and flew off flying around circles around the monster distracting it. Spike rushes up to Trixie with some rope. "Trixie, I found some rope!" she thanks the young dragon and took the rope. "Sea Swirl, Bon Bon! Catch!" Trixie tosses the rope to the two earth mares.

"Great! Now what do we do with it?" Sea Swirl asked looking over at Bon Bon who just shrugged in response. Trixie slaps herself on her forehead.

"Use it to trip the monster!" Trixie yelled.

"So...What do we do? Lyra asked standing next to the blue unicorn. "Use our magic to make a giant catapult or something?"

Trixie looks at Lyra with the widest unsure smile on her face. Truth be told, she really didn't have a plan after the trip the monster idea. "Yyyyyeeeesss?"

"Oh good," Lyra said putting a hoof on her chest. "For a second there I thought that you didn't have a plan after the trip the monster part, Ok! Lets do this!"

Lighting Dust and Blazer lead the monster over to Sea Swirl and Bon Bon who pull the rope tripping the beast on Trixie's and Lyra's giant catapult flinging the beast far into the horizon. Lighting Dust and Blazer slap hooves on a job well done.

"Aww Yeah! We just took down Godzilla!" Lighting Dust cheered.

"It looked like Godzilla, but due to international copyright laws, it wasn't." Blazer replied.

"Still we should party like we did take down Godzilla,"

"Though it wasnt,"

Trixie nods in agreement. "Good idea! Lets go to the karaoke bar!" everypony except Spike and Blazer murmured happily. Spike follows behind twiddling with his claws.

"Uh, Twilight forbade me from singing ever again after I butchered Journey."


"I'm sure she's fine," Fluttershy said softly. "

Vic Viper returns with a bag of ice for Arrowhead and puts it on his head. "Well, you guys sure know how to make an entrance," He said taking a seat on the floor. "Allow me to introduce myself since the six of you were so trashed last night, I am Vic Viper leader of Intelligence Operations. The pony currently Ko'ed is Arrowhead leader or the Magic Corps"

"I knew he looked familiar!" Twilight interrupted. "He's the one who created the Wave Cannon!"

Rarity raised an eyebrow. "Wave Cannon?"

"No don't get her started," Rainbow wined.

But it was too late as Twilight began to explain the Wave Cannon. Rainbow facehoofed while everypony else just sat there not really paying attention. "So you see, that's how the Wave Cannon is able to pass through walls! Oh the amount of magic concentration needed to-" and she continued to explain, for two hours. " It was very useful in the Bydo Wars blah blah blah yak yak yak dribble dribble dribble ect ect ect and so on and so on, any questions?"

"NO!" everypony yelled in unison.

"Well then I guess that leaves me then," Silver Hawk said with a hoof wrapped around Babs. "I am First Lieutenant Silver Hawk, but please just call me Silver Hawk, best flier in Equestria," he winks at the girls in a playful manner while sticking out his tongue.

Rainbow snorted. "Best flier? You? Ha! I'm The best flier around here! And also the fastest!"

"Oh? is that a challenge I hear?" Silver said playfully. "Let me guess, You're also going to join the Wonderbolts correct?"

"That's right!" Rainbow Dash said with fierce determination.

"Isn't that that cute?" Silver said scratching under Babs muzzle making her giggle. "When you're ready to join the big leagues baby, let me know, k?"

Rainbow stomps on the ground annoyed. Arrowhead slowly stirs awake and sits up. "Ow, what hit me?" he looks around the room until a certain yellow pegasus catches his eyes. "F-Fluttershy?!" he passes out back on the couch.

"Ohh so close," sighed Silver Hawk shaking his head.

Fluttershy ears drooped downward. She felt awful that she frightened this stallion to the point of passing out. She swore to herself that she would never drink again unless she needed it. "O-Oh dear, he sounded so frightened, I hope I didn't hurt him,"

"Naw you didn't hurt him," Flash said looking at the passed out Arrowhead. "Look it went like this,"


Flash Sentry's party 11:45pm

"Hey everypony! Thanks for coming out tonight, we hope you enjoy yourselves tonight because the night is still young!" the crowd partygoers cheered loudly as Flash Sentry spoke into the microphone. "So lets party!" Loud music begins to play in the background and everypony starts dancing. Flash steps down from the booth and heads over to the refreshment table.

"Um, excuse me?" a mare's voice called out gaining Flash's attention. "You're outta grape juice,"

"Oh no problem, I'll just get some more," he reaches under the table and pulls out a jug. "Here you go some grape-" he stops in midsentence when he saw what he grabbed. "Drink? Damn it Silver Hawk,"

Vic Viper was off to the side talking to a mare and Arrowhead was off in the corner watching the party brooding alone. "So about your friend there," they both look at the still brooding Arrowhead. "Is there a reason he's like that?"

"He's just shy, he cant start a conversation and he thinks he's very boring," shrugged Vic Viper. "You would think that the hero of the Bydo Wars would be a little more...lively."

"Boring huh?" the mare eyes light up with a idea. "My sister just had a break up recently and she's been taking it quite hard, maybe your friend their can help her have some fun tonight,"

"Arrowhead, fun? Ha! I don't think he knows the meaning of the word," Vic Viper replied. "What's your sister's name?"

A gray earth mare walks up behind them. She had a very dull expression on her face and wore a dark blue dress. If you saw her, she looked very, plain and uninteresting. The mare smiles bringing her over. "Vic Viper meet my older sister Maud Pie,"


"Wait What?! My sisters were THERE!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed terrfied. She rushes up to Flash Sentry shaking him franticly. "Are they still here! TELL ME THEY'RE STILL HERE!"

"N-No Arrowhead sent them back home, before you broke in," Pinkie Pie looks at the shattered door then angrily sits back down covering her face swearing. She looks up at Twilight somewhat pissed. " Arrrgh! Nice job Twilight! Now I'm in for it!"

Twilight gasps in shock. "Me?! I seem to recall that it was YOU who organized our little outing last night! So dont pin this one on me!"

"Come now darlings," Rarity hops between her friends pushing them apart. "Don't fight, I'm sure what ever we did couldn't be that bad,"

Flash Sentry and Vic Viper glance at each other while Silver Hawk and Babs Seed whistles innocently. "Uh, about that,"


Flash Sentry's party 11:47pm

"HEEEELLLLLOOOO EVERYPONY!" Everyone turns to the door where six friends stood wobbling. " We heard you like party. So we threw a party in this party so you can party while you party!"

"Pinkie?" Limestone and Maud said in unison.

Arrowhead raises an eyebrow glancing at the Pie sisters. "Friend of yours?"

"More like little sister," Limestone said closing her eyes.

Maud blinks with her usual dullness and monotone voice. "She sounds drunk,"

Pinkie Pie walks up to the Dj's booth and pushes him off. "NOW LET THE REAL PARTY BEGIN! HAHAHAHAHA!"

"I think you mean she is drunk," Vic Viper corrected.

Three minutes later after Twilight and her friends entered the penthouse party, they had pretty much destroyed everything in a drunken stupor. From the refreshment table which Rarity had claimed saying that somepony was trying to steal her pot of gold to the Dj booth. Someone should tell Applejack that she's not a good disk jockey.

Even Fluttershy got in on the action grabbing and holding Arrowhead in a vice like grip. "My names Fluttershy, I like to cuddle, do you like to cuddle?" Arrowhead reaches out for somepony to help him.

"Help," Arrowhead gasped. "Cant breath,"

Silver Hawk opens his bedroom hearing all the commotion. "Do you mind keeping it down? We're trying to have a match here!" Flash turns his head sharply at the silvery pegasus.

"Silver you dumbass! Help us!" he said trying to things back under control.

"Gee captain I would but I'm in the middle of a triple threat match, so, no." and with that he closed and locked the door leaving him own his own.

"Thank you my first lieutenant," Flash deadpanned.

Unfortunately, most of the guest have left the party leaving only Flash Sentry, Vic Viper, Arrowhead, Limestone and Maud Pie to deal with the six drunken friends. They had to get them under control before they did something they would regret. Before they could do anything though they heard a loud banging on the door.

"MANEHATTEN POLICE! OPEN THE DOOR!"


"And that's what happened," Flash said lowering his head down. "I swear."

Twilight and her friends look at each other embarrassed. Babs herself was feeling kind of flustered and it wasn't because Silver Hawk playing with her mane either. "But I thought that you called the police on them," she said.

Flash shakes his head. "I didn't call them. I was too busy trying to stop Twilight from jumping off the building thinking that she was an alicorn princess. And Arrowhead and Maud was dealing with Pinkie while Vic Viper and Limestone handled the rest of you. Maybe one of the guests did?"

"Shucks Mista Flash," Applejack said taking off her hat." "We're mighty sorry for ta trouble, it was wrong of us,"

"Its alright," smiled Flash. "It was quite the night after all. I should thank Shinning Armor for kicking me out for the week, and don't worry I wont tell your brother or parents Twilight,"

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you Flash, thank you so much,"

"Hey, what's that?" Pinkie asked noticing a slip of paper that had fallen out of Applejack's hat. Applejack picks it up looking at it.

"Its an address, Babs do you know where this is?" Applejack gives Babs Seed the paper.

"That's- that's just a few blocks down,"

Twilight stands up. "Come on girls its time to go, thank you for the help Flash, and sorry about the door," They leave the room leaving Flash and his companions in their penthouse room.

"Ugh, what happened?" Arrowhead groaned holding his head.


The address on the paper brought the girls to a small little building. " Well here we are girls," Twilight said looking up at the building. "The address on the paper that fell out of Applejack's hat,"

"I have a bad feeling about this," Rainbow said, "I can feel it in my wings,"

"You sense it too huh Dashie?" Pinkie replied. "My hind leg wont stop shaking, I think something big is about to happen, like story related big,"

Applejack walks up to one of the windows looking inside. "Ya'll worry too much, Ahm sure its-" Applejack stops in midsentence and rushes inside. Twilight and the girls quickly follow her inside where she pinned a gray pegasus on the floor. "Finally! after all these months, Ah finally caught you ya little varmint!" the gray pegasus tries to struggle free but Applejack was much stronger than he was. "Now you'll pay for what ya done to my baby sister!"

"Please! Miss Applejack let me go!" he squeaked. "Please don't hurt me!"

"I suggest you do what my brother said and back off!" Rainbow Dash and Rarity slowly turned around, they knew that voice. It was a voice that one never wanted to hear again and the other one wanted to hear for some time.

"Its been a long time," Rainbow's eye started twitching in anger at the pony before her. "Thunderlane"

You May Want to Clear Some Confusion

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Twilight and Trixie laid comfortably on one of the couches in Twilight's library room. Twilight was reading a book while Trixie was laying on Twilight sleeping peacefully. Twilight chuckles lightly rubbing her wife's back humming a tune. "Hmm? Oh hello there, I didn't see you come in," Twilight closes the book and levitates it back to its proper place back on the bookshelf. "I know forth wall breaking is more of Pinkie's thing but after that last chapter I feel that there are some things that need to be addressed."

Twilight shifts Trixie off of her and lays her on the couch, she goes into the hall closet to retrieve a blanket. "I know we have a large amount of characters and we met many more on our quest, but only a few have anything to do with the story so don't worry." the purple unicorn drapes the cover on her sleeping wife. "But with what happened in the last chapter with Rumble and Thunderlane most of you must be so confused, so allow me to explain." Twilight takes a deep breath but another voice cuts her off before she spoke.

"You see, a long time ago, a pegasus named Rumble fell in love with an earth pony named Apple Bloom." Twilight turns her head to the voice.

"Morgan Freeman?" Twilight said dumbfounded. "What are you doing here?"

Mr. Freeman took a seat on one of Twilight's couches crossing his legs in a dignified gentleman's pose. "I'm here to explain what's going on."

"Uhh, why?" Twilight asked still dumbfounded.

"Because when I come out of nowhere to explain something, I earn a freckle."

Twilight stares blankly for a few seconds before shrugging. "Whatever, would you like some tea Mr. Freeman?"

"Tea sounds lovely little purple unicorn creature."

Twilight merely rolls her eyes as she left the room to retrieve some tea as Morgan Freeman clears his throat preparing to speak again. "Now were was I? Oh yes, Rumble dated Apple Bloom an earth pony while his brother Thunderlane was dating Rarity a unicorn much to the chagrin of Spike. Also Thunderlane was a part of weather team seven with Rainbow Dash, Flitter and Cloudchaser and everything was well. But as they say, happiness doesn't last forever. One day a argument between two friends broke out and was quickly spiraling out of control."

Meanwhile Trixie started stirring awake. She sits up on the couch stretching her limbs. "Whoops," she said rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "I must have fallen asleep while Twilight was still reading." Trixie's eyes wondered over to the man sitting in the chair talking to no one in particular. "Morgan Freeman?"

Just then Twilight returned levitating a cup of tea with her. She sits the cup on the stand next Mr. Freeman and took a seat next to Trixie wrapping a foreleg around her. "Twilight!" Trixie whispered to Twlight. "That's Morgan Freeman!"

"I know Trixie, I know." Twilight replied nonchalantly.

"What's he doing here in our house?" Trixie asked looking back at the man wearing the white suit. "And what is he doing?"

Twilight sighs leaning back on the couch. "Apparently explaining what happened between Rumble, Apple Bloom, Thunderlane and Rarity. You know, that thing that happened a couple of months ago."

"Why?" Trixie asked also dumbfounded. "We already know what happened."

"I know honey but you remember that last chapter which revealed the father of Apple Bloom's foal?"

Trixie snorts while trying to stop from busting out in laughter. "Yes, too bad James Burton sucked at foreshadowing things and almost everyone got confused."

"Well that, and Morgan Freeman earns a freckle every time he explains something." both ponies glance at Morgan Freeman who was still explaining the plot.

"So while the girls were in Las Pegasus they met up with Discord who told them that-"

Trixie leans over to Twilight whispering in her ear. "How long is he gonna keep this up?"

Twilight just shrugs in response.

"So what should we do now?" Trixie asked. "Just go ahead and go back to the story?"

"Eh, sounds like a plan."


Thunderlane steps forward gritting his teeth. "I'm only going to say this one more time, step away from my brother." Applejack reluctantly steps off Rumble and backs away. Rumble get back up and runs behind his older brother. "Now I'm only giving you to the count of five to leave before I call the police."

"Whoa there uh Thunderlane," Rarity steps forward standing in front of the angry pegasus. "There's no need to get the police involved, I'm sure we talk this out."

But Thunderlane only shakes his head angrily. "I'm done talking." Rarity could have sworn he sounded more hurt than angry. "J-Just go." he turns around and motions for Rumble to follow. "C'mon bro, you're taking the rest of the day off."

"B-But Thunderlane." Rarity tries to gain his attention but Applejack puts a hoof on her. Rarity just closes her eyes and wipes a few tears away.

"No, no more tears Rarity!" Rainbow Dash grabs Rarity forcing the white unicorn to look in her eyes. "You gotten that out of your system remember? Don't give this jackass anymore tears! Remember what he and stupid his brother did."

That got Thunderlane to stop dead in his tracks. "What did you say?!" he said in a calm anger like tone. "Because I COULD have sworn that it was that bitch you call a sister fault!"

Everypony in the room gasped. Thunderlane just insulted Scootaloo right in front of Rainbow Dash. Aww horseapples things were about to get bloody very fast.

"I'm sorry, but I could have sworn you just called my lil sis a bitch," the rainbow colored mare digs in her ears cleaning them out. "Would you care to say that again in my face so I can hear you better?"

Rumble tries to hold his brother back but it was no use. Thunderlane steps in front of Rainbow Dash getting in her face. "Your. Sister. Is . A . BITCH!"

*DING* DING* DING*

Rainbow Dash headbuts Thunderlane on the nose causing him reel back in pain. Security guards come from both sides holding both ponies back as the crowd cheers wildly.

JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

Then Thunderlane breaks free rushing up to Rainbow Dash landing a solid hit on the eye. The guards restrain him pulling him back before he could land another hit. "THIS IS ALL SCOOTALOO'S FAULT!" he screamed.

"DONT BLAME SCOOTALOO FOR SOMETHING YOU DID!"

*DING*DING*DING*

Both of them broke free charging at each other landing hit after hat on each other. The crowd was absolutely ecstatic watching these two go at it. Finally the security guards separate the two from there fight.

JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

Jerry Springer just facepalms shaking his head. "Well be right back after these messages." while Pinkie Pie just looks around confused.

"Ok, what the HELL just happened here?!"

Meanwhile, Rumble was outside sitting on the curb drinking whiskey from a flask while watching his brother and Rainbow Dash get carted off by the police, again. This was the second time that this had happened since last night at that party. Rumble takes another long drink sighing, maybe he should have let Applejack beat him up for breaking Apple Bloom's heart.

"Excuse me?" Rumble looks over to the entryway where Babs Seed stood. "You're Rumble aren't yas?"

"Um, yes I am Rumble," he said. "Can I help you?" Babs makes her way over to Rumble taking a seat next to him. "If you're asking for a date, I'm sorry but I don't want to date anypony right now."

"I'm not askin ya for a date," she said rolling her eyes. "My name is Babs Seed, Apple Bloom's cousin."

Rumble closes the flask and sits it next to him. "If you wish to punch my face in, go ahead, I don't care anymore." the gray pegasus closes his eyes waiting for Babs to hit him, but it never came. "Well? What are you waiting for? I'm the one who broke her heart, go on! Hit me!"

"I'm not hittin ya," Babs said firmly. "Apple Bloom wouldn't like that."

"And why not?!" Rumble growled. "I thought she wanted nothing to do with me anymore! Tell me then Babs! Tell me why hasn't she answered any of my letters!"

"Huh?! She never got a letter from you."

Rumble turns his head sharply to the earth mare. "Bullshit! I sent her hundreds of tear stained letters! Begging her to not let our relationship end the way that it did!"

"What?! She wrote to me, pouring her heart out hoping to get a letter from you so she could-" Babs eyes widen in horror. "Oh my Celestia, y-you don't know, do you?"

"Know what!" Rumble was absolutely furious now. "If you know something! You better tell me right now!"

Babs face falls into a sorrowful look. "Babs? Did something happen to Apple Bloom?" he grabs the earth pony shaking her. "Is she alright! Tell me she's ok!"

"Rumble, I don't know how to tell you this," Babs began. "But Apple Bloom is pregnant, eleven months pregnant. And you're going to be a father."


Twilight and her friends exited the police station with Twilight growling every step of the way. Because Rainbow made the first attack she was now in holding for battery while Thunderlane clamed self-defense and pretty much got off scott free all because Applejack did not have a very good poker face. The girls walked to the nearest café to plan how to get Rainbow Dash out of this.

"See Applejack!" Pinkie exclaimed. "This is why you lose so much money playing poker with us!"

Applejack only covers her face with her hat.

"I think we need to figure out what are we going to do," Fluttershy said firmly.

Twilight nods in agreement. "I agree with Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash needs our help, I'll send Flash a letter asking if he could help us in any way he can." Twilight pulls out a piece of paper and a quill and begins to write. "I suggest we check into a hotel cause we are going to be here for a while."

"Hey, where's Babs?" Fluttershy asked looking around. "Wasn't she with us?" everypony just looked around while Rarity just sat there with her head hung low playing with her tea not really paying attention. "Are you okay Rarity?"

Rarity quickly looks at Fluttershy with a wide smile." I'm fine darling, no need to worry about me! Honest!" the white unicorn chuckles while trying to smile even wider getting closer to Fluttershy's face. "See? This is me jusssssttttt finnnnnnee."

"Oh thank Celestia I found you guys!" Twilight and her friends notice that a gray stallion was rushing towards them. "Listen, I need that reel back."

"Are you talking to us?" Twilight asked the gray stallion. "And what reel?"

"Yes Twilight I am talking to you," he said in a panic. "And its very, very, VERY important that I have that reel of film back!"

"Ya mean like, a movie reel?" Applejack said.

The gray stallion facehoofs hard stretching his face down in exasperation. "Yes Applejack and I need it back, like, RIGHT NOW!"

"Wait how do you know us? Twilight asked the gray stallion.

The gray stallion wanted to slam his head on the table but resisted the urge to do so. "Look, Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and hey, where is Rainbow Dash?"

"Kind of being held at the moment." Pinkie muttered.

"It doesn't matter! All that matters is that I have that reel back!" he holds his hoof out waiting for the girls to give the movie reel over to him.

"I'm sorry sir," Fluttershy apologized. "But we don't have a movie reel with us."

The stallion gasped loudly, shaking his head with disbelief. "You don't have it?! Ok, whew, deep breath, in, out, in, out," after taking some deep breaths the gray stallion calms down looking at the girls with a serious expression. "Last night I accidently may have quite possibly given you girls a very important film, by accident of course, and, look just, just get out of town before Sunny Sands finds you."

The stallion leaves the girls in a hurry as they wondered what was up with that. "I wonder what was up with that?" Pinkie asked. "I hope that doesn't come back to bite us."

"Pinkie what is that supposed to mean?" Twilight asked. "And why is your eye twitching?"

"Oh, no reason, hint, hint."

Before Going Back on Your Quest

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"Welp, that could've went better," Twilight said leaning on the bars of her jail cell. She and her friends were currently sitting in a jail cell while Pinkie Pie played a song on a harmonica. "But at least we stopped Sunny Sands and destroyed that horrible movie."

The girls in the cell agreed while Rainbow Dash looked clueless. "Uh, what movie? It feels like I've been in here for a month."

"But you only been in here for an hour," Twilight corrected. "And as for that movie, well lets just say that it made Twilight look like a good love story."

The six friends in the cell shuttered.

"It was for the best that we destroyed it." Rarity added. "I have never seen anything so horrific in my life."

"Wait, so is that how you guys ended up in here?" Rainbow asked. "All because you destroyed some movie?"

Twilight tapped her hoof on the bars. "That's not all we did." Rainbow stands silently for a few seconds looking at her friends who seemed to be interested in something else while Pinkie playing a song on her harmonica and Fluttershy playing with some beads around her neck.

"So, aren't you going to tell me what happened?"

Before Twilight could answer a guard stops in front of the cell and opens the cell door. "Alright girls, the judge will see you now."

The girls exited the cell following the guard into a courtroom where the judge and the jury sat looking at the girls. "Ok girls," Twilight whispered to her friends. "Let me handle this, I've been reading up on Equestrian law." the others took a seat while Twilight Sparkle stood before the judge as he cleared his throat.

"Wha, wha wha wha wha wha wha wha?" Twilight looked at the judge baffled as he spoke. "Wha wha wha wha wha wha wha wha? Wha wha."

After a few seconds of silence Twilight finally spoke. "What?"

"Wha wha wha wha wha wha wha? Wha wha wha wha wha!" The judge repeated.

Twilight looks over to her friends hoping that one of them could help her out, but they was just as confused as she was. "Oooookkay, does anypony know what the hell is he saying?" Rainbow whispered. When she received no reply, her widen with a another idea. "Hey, where's Babs? Maybe she could help us out?"

"Sorry Sugarcube," Applejack apologized. "Cousin Babs left fer Ponyville with Rumble, Thunderlane and those Pegasus sisters."

"Now why would they go to Ponyville for?" Applejack gives Rainbow Dash a are you serious look." Oh right, Rumble is the father of Apple Bloom's foal, totally forgot about that."

"Oh! That reminds me, Rainbow, when we return to Ponyville; You, me and Thunderlane are going to talk about some things." Rarity said happily.

The cyan rainbowed mare folded her forelegs in defiance. "No way."

"Yes way!" Rarity pokes Rainbow Dash on her chest. " I absolutely REFUSE to be forever alone just because you cant get the sand out of your vagina!"

The judge bangs on the gavel demanding order in the court. "Wha! Wha wah wha wha wha wha!" Rarity and Rainbow Dash just looked at the judge with blank stares as Pinkie Pie stands up and walks towards the still stumped Twilight.

"Don't worry Twilight!" Pinkie said with her usual cheerful attitude. "I got this, I've playing Phoenix Wright!"

"Uh Pinkie?" Twilight said trying to stop the pink earth pony. "Court really doesn't work like that, and that game is overrated anyway."

Pinkie gasps and quickly cover Twilight's mouth whispering in her ear. "Twilight! Are you trying to get us killed?!" Pinkie quickly looks outside where a random stallion quickly ducked behind some bushes. "I'm on to you buddy!"

"Pinkie focus!" Twilight exclaimed. "How is a VIDEO GAME going to help us? Like I said; Courts DONT work like that!"

Pinkie Pie pats Twilight head while laughing. "Twi, Twi, Twi, It will work you just have to believe! And besides, if it worked for Motherly Scootaloo it can certainly work for us."

"Motherly whatnow?" Rainbow replied.

"Long story." Fluttershy replied.

Pinkie Pie stands before the judge. "Ok judgey we're ready!" Twilight had a bad feeling that things wasn't going to end well.

"Wha! Wha wha wha wha wha wha wha wha wha."

Pinkie puts a hoof under her chin humming. "Twilight, yes or no?"

"What? Pinkie what did he-"

"Yes or No Twilight!"

"Uhh, no?"

Pinkie seemed happy at the response. "Ooh good one! Ahem, Your honor, Twilight said that we are not guilty of our crime," Twilight took a breath of relief. "But! We are guilty of sleeping with your wife."

Twilight face dropped down to the ground as the jury murmured amongst themselves as the judge's eyes widen with surprise. "Wha?!"

"That's right!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Right in the vajay vajay!"

The judge's face turned red with anger. "Ooh bad move Twilight, he looks quite mad." Twilight grabbed Pinkie Pie shaking her furiously.

"Pinkie! What the hell are you doing! I'm married remember! Apologize right now!" Pinkie Pie hums again and turns to face the judge.

"Your honor, Twilight said that we would like to apologize," Twilight took another sigh of relief. "That your wife found you inadequate and that she had to sleep with six mares just because you couldn't do your job."

The jury murmured amongst themselves again except lightly chuckling. "Wha!! Wha wha wha wha wha!"

"That's easy!" Pinkie said happily. "Magic potions, badly made brews or convenient magical spells. You can get them just about anywhere."

Rainbow Dash facehoofed. "Welp, goodbye jail, hello prison."

Twilight however, wished she just stayed home today. Going on an adventure after being hung over was not a good idea. It would make a funny movie though. "Pinkie, just ask if we can take a recess."

"Hmm, I can ask. Excuse me your honor," Pinkie said to the judge. "Twilight said that Motherly Scootaloo suck, you suck and Equestrian Court suck and we would like to leave," Pinkie shifts her eyes. "To do your wife, is that cool?"

The entire courtroom was so quiet that you could hear the sound of a tree falling in a forest.

"Wha."

"Ok cool!" Pinkie Pie turns to her friends. "Come on guys lets go."


"I cant believe that worked." Twilight muttered as the walked away from the courtroom. "But how did you know what he was saying?"

"Silly Twilight," Pinkie replied as she bounced down the stairs. "I had no clue what he was saying!"

Twilight stopped. Her right eye was twitching very badly and her entire body was shaking heavily and she was sure that she busted a blood vessel. She took a deep breath calming herself down smiling. "You know what? I quit."

"What do you mean?" Fluttershy meekly asked.

"I quit!" Twilight repeated. "I am SO done with this."

"But what about the marr-"

"Fluttershy, I don't care anymore, I just want to go home." Twilight interrupted. "I'm sick and tired of all the craziness, I'm done."

The others agreed with Twilight. This had been the worst day of their lives. "Aw come on guys!" Rainbow Dash said standing in front of her friends. "We just cant let a couple of bad experiences ruin the fun times!"

"THERE YOU ARE DWEEB!" Gilda descends from the sky and lands in front of Rainbow Dash.

"Gilda?" Rainbow said puzzled. "What are you doing here?"

Gilda doesn't say a word. She grabs Rainbow's face and pulls her in for a passionate kiss.

"Ohh my!" Fluttershy gasped as Gilda broke the kiss.

"Now who's the better kisser?" She slapped Rainbow's flank before taking back off in the air. Twilight and her friends looked at Rainbow Dash who was still recovering from the kiss.

"Guys, I wanna go home." Rainbow said on the verge of tears.

Twilight sighs. "Alright everypony huddle up and I'll teleport us back home."

"Twilight daring," Rarity said breaking Twilight's concentration. "Could we please stop by Coco Pommel's penthouse first? She was going to send me some fabric but since we're here."

"Sure, why not." Twilight shrugged.


*Knock *Knock*Knock

"Coco darling, are you home?" Rarity asked knocking on the door again. "Its Rarity!"

The girls stand at the door for a few seconds waiting for a response. "Maybe she's not home?" Fluttershy wondered out loud.

"Well I did kind of showed up unannounced," Rarity agreed. "Come on girls, lets go."

The sound of a door unlocking made the six friends stop in there tracks. The door opens slightly and a cream colored mare appeared through the crack. "Yes? Can I-" her eyes widen and a warm smile appeared on her face. "Oh Rarity! Why hello, what brings you here?"

"Hello Coco," Rarity greeted. "Sorry for showing up unannounced, but I came to pick up the fabric you was going to send me. Do you still have it?"

"Oh yes! The fabric, I-I still have it, j-just let me go get that for you." Coco quickly closes the door leaving the girls outside.

Applejack takes off her hat scratching her mane. "Well that was weird."

Twilight nods her head in agreement. "That was pretty weird. It seemed like she was in a hurry."

"Well she is a fashion designer," Rarity commented. "Maybe she was in the middle-"

A large crashing sound came from Coco's penthouse interrupting the white pony. "Oh no! Coco!" they quickly enter her abode seeing if she was alright. "Coco are you-"

Coco looked up at the girls like a deer caught in headlights. She was quickly trying to pick up the shards of broken glass off the ground. Twilight and her friends stared at Coco who was wearing a very sexy dominatrix outfit then soon turned their attention to the stallion who was wearing a gimp suit, ballgag and a blindfold hanging down from the ceiling.

"O..k.."

The room was awkwardly silent for a few moments until a another voice broke the silence. "Sister Coco, are you ok?" Rarity's gasped. She knew that voice. A pink pony exited from another room wearing a similar outfit. "I thought I herd a crash."

"SURI?!" Rarity gasped in shock.

"RARITY?!" Suri replied back.

"SURI?!"

"RARITY?!"

"SURI?!"

"RARITY?!"

"SURI?!"

"RARITY?!"

"PINKIE!" both mares look at the pink pony who shrunk back. "I just wanted to be a part of the moment."

Coco sat down covering her face in embarrassment. Suri Polomare makes her way over to her wrapping a comforting foreleg around her. "Sister, do not be ashamed."

The room was awkward, really awkward. Like when you confess to your school crush in front of the entire school but only to find out that she doesn't like you that way and now you just made a complete ass of yourself awkward or your parents busting into your room while you're trying to bust a nut awkward or farting during an oral presentation in front your entire class or during sex awkward.

Things was just, so awkward right now.

"I suppose you would like an explanation?" Suri guessed breaking the silence.

"Not really no." Twilight replied.

"Didn't you used to hate Suri, Coco?" Fluttershy asked.

Coco removes her hooves from her face. "I used to, until I found the S.O.B."

"The S.O.B?" Rainbow Dash had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing.

"The Sisterhood of Bondage," Suri said annoyed. "A place where mares like us can indulge in our fantasy of dominating males."

Twilight shakes her head in shame. "So in other words, taking advantage of helpless stallions."

"Actually Twi,"Applejack began. "Bondage isn't even like that, ya see, they don't take advantage of anypony as it is the submissive one who holds the power. Its a trust thing, he's trusting them to stop when he says so and not go completely wild and hurt him and a safe word is usually in place to prevent accidents." Applejack crosses her forelegs proudly with a smirk.

"I'm not even going to ask how you know this." Twilight said.


Last Year

"Hey Twi," Applejack called out. "Are ya home?"

Twilight looks up from a book she was reading. "Hello Applejack, what brings you here?"

"Ah'm here to return this book you gave me."

Twilight grabs the book with her magic. "Ah, Fifty Shades of Hay. So did find what you was looking for?"

"About that," Applejack said looking around. "That was not a farming book."

Twilight gives a look of confusion. "It wasn't?"

"No it wasn't," Applejack said nervously. "Hey, uh, Twi, do you have the sequel to that book though?"


"Ah do mah homework" Applejack replied tipping her hat.

Suri stands up making her way over to Applejack. "Well explained Miss?"

"Applejack"

"Well explained Miss Applejack!" Suri replied shaking her hoof. "Would you like to join our Sisterhood? Some of the guys have been asking for a farm pony and I think you'll be a perfect fit!"

"Boy Howdy!" Applejack replied swinging her hoof in excitement. "Sure I'll join!"

"APPLEJACK!" Twilight cried.

Both Suri and Coco hug their new sister. "Welcome to the S.O.B Sister Applejack," Suri said smiling. "You'll love the stallions at the stables."

"They treat us like princesses," Coco replied. "They take us out on dates and buy us gifts." Coco gives Applejack a card. "Here, take this sister, its our next S.O.B meeting!"

Applejack takes the card and puts it under her hat. "Thank ya kindly, sisters."

"Un-freaking-believable." Rainbow Dash muttered.

They hug one more time before Coco gives Rarity her fabric. "Here you go Rarity, now if you will excuse us," both Suri and Coco turn their attention back to the hanging stallion. "There's a naughty stallion in need of some discipline."

"Rrrrrright," Rarity said. "We'll just show ourselves out."

After leaving Coco's penthouse with Rarity's fabric and with things they really didn't need to know. Twilight asked if they had anymore business in Manehattan before they left for home. The others shook their head indicating that they were ready to go back to Ponyville.

"Alright girls," Twilight said. "Huddle up and lets go home."

Twilight's horn lights up and the six friends disappeared in a flash of light.


In the middle of a city, a small little pizzeria stood decaying from years of neglect, or somebody couldn't afford regular upkeep. There was an icy chill in the wind as the leaves and chips of paint blew in the sky.

"We'll here we are girls," Twilight said smiling. "Home sweet home."

"Uh, Twilight?" Fluttershy muttered noticing something off.

"Ahm going to go see how Apple Bloom's doing."

"Uh, excuse me."

"And I got parties to plan! Hopefully this one wont suck."

"Girls?"

"Don't forget Rainbow Dash!" Rarity said. "We got things to discuss with Thunderlane!"

"Yeah yeah whatever." Rainbow pouted.

"Girls!"

"I guess I'll go see how Spike and Trixie are doing. " Twilight said looking off to the side. "I wonder if she made anything to eat?" the purple pony notices that her friends are looking at her. "What? I'm hungry and Trixie can cook."

"GIRLS!"

The others turn and give Fluttershy their attention. "What is it darling?" Rarity asks as Fluttershy only points to a building behind them.

"What is a Freddy's Family Pizzeria?"

Were you Ready?

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Uh hello? Hello hello? Well If you're reading this, then chances are things about to get real.

Last Night 11:56pm

"Sir, what are we going to do? With Mr. Schmidt's termination we don't have anybody to watch the animatronics and it's almost time."

"I'm aware of that, we to find someone down on their luck with no family members or friends or willing to ask questions."

There was a bright flash of light making both men cover their eyes from the intensity of the light. When the light was gone and both men could see again they were surprised to find six multicolored ponies stumbling around an a drunken stupor. "Hai ther," Twilight said wobbling. "Werr dunk."

"Sir, a-are you seeing this?"

"Y-yeah."

"Ok good, for a moment there I thought that was the pot talking."

"Hey! This gives me an idea! Children love ponies right? So what if a certain bunch of animatronics got their hands on them and turned them into one. We'll win back the hearts of children and parents alike with their cuteness and clean smell! Freddy Fazbears Pizzeria would return to its former glory!"

The mysterious man walked towards Twilight and her drunken friends with a wide smile on his face. "Hey there little pastel ponies, how would you like a job at the happiest place on earth?"

"Burp" Twilight belched in response.

"Taking that as a yes," the man lead Twilight and her friends inside a small building. "Ok then, let's get you inside and fill out your W-2's while I go over your benefits, we got excellent dental care, vision care, we don't got life insurance though. It's real out here."


Twilight Sparkle looked up at the run-down sign that said Freddy Fazbears Pizzeria on it with a puzzling look on her face. "That's weird, I could have sworn I teleported us back to Ponyville." They continue to look at the sign in the night sky. "Does anypony else have a weird feeling about this place?"

"It does feel off," Rarity agreed. "Do you feel some kind of energy too Twilight?"

Twilight nods in agreement. "Yeah, I do, It feels like spiritual energy. It's feint but it's there." Twilight turned to her friends asking if they felt it too. They shook their heads no and Twilight turned back to the building. "Uh, maybe we should just go and leave this place."

"AH-HA!" Pinkie's sudden shout causes her friends to jump slightly. "I knew this place sounded familiar!" she pull out a black shirt. "Look, Freddy's Fazbears Pizzeria!"

Twilight looked at the shirt, then at then at the restaurant, then back at the shirt growling angrily. "You have GOT to be shitting me!"


"So that covers everything, good luck and have a nice night!" the man quickly left the room muttering something about a revival but the girls were too drunk to notice.

"Hey, hey, hey, Twilight," Applejack stammered. "Wat is device herr?" Applejack saw a red button flashing on a phone and presses it replaying a message.

Yo, what's up? My name is Mike Schmidt and I was the previous security guard before you. You might be wondering why am I leaving you a message for your first night. Well, the last guy which I have dubbed Phone Guy died, I think? And management got me to record some messages for you before they fired me. Dirty bastards. Well anyway, about your job, it sucks, it powerful sucks and they probably didn't tell you about the killer animatronics and don't think about leaving during the middle of the night cause it's safer in that room. Why? Because of Freddy and his friends. But luckily for you, you have a badass who survived the week with them, me. But if the power goes out, then, well I hope your life insurance is paid up. So, close the doors if you need to and check the camera often cause no doubt you'll see Freddy and his friends. And if you Do see them, tell Freddy, Bonnie, Chicka, and Foxy, Mike said to suck his dick. Mike out.

The recording ended and the six friends just sat there playing with the doors and lights. "Dorr goes up, dorr goes down, dorr goes up, dorr goes down."


Twilight and her friends explore the abandoned pizzeria, searching for any kind of clue that brought them here. Well Twilight was searching for clues, her friends however were too busy playing with the animatronics. Fluttershy was cuddling Bonnie while saying on how cute he was. Rarity was saying how she could make new clothes for Chicka and Pinkie Pie was wearing Freddy's hat making some silly faces.

And as for Applejack and Rainbow Dash? Well they found pirate's cove with two mugs singing Yar-har fiddle dee being a pirate is awesome you see. "Hey Twilight," Rainbow Dash called out. "Come check out these awesome machines."

"Not till I found out what called us here." Twilight replied. She could've sworn she teleported back home to Ponyville but here they are, in some abandoned pizzeria, in some town, at night, with six of her friends, with four animatronics with abnormal energy coming from them or something.

But this was something that required her attention. She had no idea who or what called them here and she didn't like it one bit, but all she found was empty rooms, except one with a empty golden beaten bunny suit. "What called us here?" Twilight asked herself.


In the cover of darkness three animatronics stood lifelessly in the pizzeria, that is until the clock hit twelve. The animatronics slowly raised their heads and looked at each other. Freddy Fazbear glances over to Bonnie nodding his head. Bonnie returns the gesture and goes off into the darkness towards the security room.

Ten minutes later

Bonnie returned from the security room completely frazzled, like he saw something unusual. "Man I almost shitted myself." he said quickly taking his usual spot.

"You almost shitted yourself?" Chicka repeated.

"Almost shitted myself!" Bonnie confirmed. "Those ponies are no joke! I'm not going back out there!"

Freddy and Chicka exchange glances. "Ponies?" Chicka asked her purple comrade. "Like the one's they have at farms?"

"No, like the one's that live in penthouses, WHAT DO YOU THINK?!"

"Alright Bonnie," Freddy said trying to calm Bonnie down. "Just calm down for a sec." He secretly turns to Chicka twirling a finger around the right side of his head. "Why don't you take the night off."

"But what about the Puppet?" Bonnie whispered. "Wont he get mad that we aren't doing our jobs of randomly killing security guards because of what happened to us?"

Freddy just waves a hand at him. "Let me worry about him." he turned to Chicka who was already off the stage. "Chicka, go see what all the fuss is about."

Chicka nods and goes off into the darkness. "Hmph, ponies, how ridiculous."

Some time later.

Chicka returned to the dinning room area looking absolutely crestfallen. She doesn't say a word to her friends as she walks over to a corner, sits down hugging her legs. Freddy and Bonnie look over towards Chicka with Bonnie giving his I told you so look. What could've happen to her that put her in such a state?

"Chicka?" Freddy asked concerned for his friend. "Chicka are you alright?"

The yellow chicken slowly shook her head no.

"Well aren't you going to tell us what happened?" Freddy asked.

Chicka just shook her head again. Bonnie folds his arms glancing off to the side. "I told you, those ponies are no joke."

"Ahoy mateys!" Foxy the pirate and favorite of many fangirls said entering the room. "So I be scowering the internet in discovered we have a dating sim game of us." he looked at Chicka who was still in the same position. "Arrr what be her problem?"

"She had a run in with the new security guard." Bonnie replied pointing back at Chicka.

Foxy seemed to perk up at hearing that they have a new security guard. Although he would admit it but he had fun when Mike was around and was a big help when Freddy and the gang visited 4chan. Now that was something he never wanted to go through again. Who knew so many people wanted to terrible things to him, weird things, butt things, with mayonnaise. "Avast Capt'n! We be havin another scruvvy dog?"

"Yep." Freddy sighed. "But I think you should know-"

"Excellent! Time to make this land lubber walk the plank!" Foxy bends down like he's about to start a race in the Olympics. "Swiggity swooty, Foxy's gunnin for that booty." he takes off running for the security office in the hope of catching some unlucky unfortunate slipping.

"You can be a real ass sometimes Bonnie." Freddy said to his guitarist.

"No, that was Balloon Boy". Bonnie replied.

Yep, time has passed yadda yadda yadda.

Foxy returned to his friends with a thousand yard look on his face. He had just escaped the terror or terrors that was in the security room. After discovering Rule 34 he thought that nothing could faze him ever again but boy was he wrong. He walk back to his curtain closing it, as if to hide himself from the world.

"Nice work Bonnie," Freddy said to his friend annoyed. "Now he's in his emo mode again."

The room suddenly gets dark as the sound of a generator dies down from a lack of power. "Well, I think its time that I paid a visit to our friends." Freddy said leaving the stage. Turning on his mane theme of you are so screwed cause Freddy coming for you Toreador March, he makes his way to the office with his signature giggle.

Only to stop dead in his tracks when he finds six colorful ponies staring right back at him. "Ooooh pwerrty bear." the yellow pegasus squealed. "I cuddles you now." the six ponies advance forward making Freddy take a step back. "You're going to love me. Forever."

Well that was new, and creepy, very creepy. He finally saw why Bonnie was so scared. That yellow pegasus looked like she was going to attack. "Uh, H-how ya'll doing? Freddy stammered. "W-we got pizza and refreshments in dining room if ya'll famished, but if you don't like that I can get ya some hay, oats, grass or something?"

The six ponies step forward again. "Oh! I know what you'll like, ya'll wanna beat up Balloon Boy don't you?" the pastel ponies stop moving and look at the shaking in fear bear. "I can make it happen!"

The room got silent for a minute with the ponies looking at each other. "Aw, give us a hug." spoke the pink one.

"Please don't hurt me!" Freddy commanded fearfully. "Please don't hurt me, I got kids!" but his words fell on deaf ears as the ponies embraced him in a hug. "Ok, ok ohhhhkkkk, give me hug, give me hug."


Twilight went back to her friends who were still playing with the animatronics. "Come on girls, it's time to go." they all groaned in disappointment but returned to Twilight's side. "I've searched this entire place and could not find the responsible party for our arrival."

"So the egghead messed up a spell." Rainbow mocked. "That's not like you Twilight."

"I know, I know" Twilight said disappointingly. "Let's just return to Equestria." They disappear in a bright light leaving without a trace of their arrival.

"A-are they gone?" Bonnie asks.

"Yeah I think so." Freddy replied.


In a open area somewhere in Equestria, a light blue unicorn was sleeping peacefully in her bed. She has had a long day with trying to regain her magician career. Trixie Lulamoon was her name and magical spells were her game and she was on route to Las Pegasus to restart her career.

Knock Knock

Trixie awoke, startled that somepony was at her door at this time. She angrily gets up from her bed making her way to the door. "Who dares to awaken the TIRED AND SLEEPY TRIXIE?!" she opens the door finding six familiar ponies wearing some kind of black shirts. "Whaa, Sparkle and friends?!

"Oh hai Trix-ie," Twilight managed to say. "We so is drunk now right."

For the GREAT and POWERFUL TRIXIE!

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Ladies and Gentlemen put your hooves together for the mare of magic, the show stopper, the one who's skills know no equal, the one and only, The Great and Powerful Trixie!

Trixie appears on stage in a puff of smoke. "Greetings Trixie's loyal followers! It certainly been quite some time since Trixie has seen your wonderful faces." she takes a bow for the crowd which was roaring with applause. "Thank you, thank you you're far to kind for little ol Trixie."

She blows a kiss out to her audience. "Before we get started, Trixie would like you to meet Trixie's dearest companions she met while in Ponyville. "Give a warm welcome to those high flying schoolteachers, Lightning Dust and Blazer!"

Lightning Dust and her assistant Blazer walked on stage waving to the crowd who received them warmly. They stood next to Trixie as she introduced her next companion. "Next, she is the mare of the oceans, studying the life within, give it up for the marine biologist, Sea Swirl!"

Sea Swirl quickly entered the stage and hid behind Trixie poking her head out looking at the crowd. "Looks like somepony has a case of stage fright." Trixie told the crowd. "But not to worry, these final two are no strangers to large crowds. "Lyra and Bon Bon! Come on down!"

Lyra and Bon Bon enter the stage standing on the other side of Trixie. "Hey! How come we don't get cool titles?" Lyra asked.

"Because everybody knows what you two do." Trixie responded. "Bon Bon is a candy maker while you play the lyre to fund for your 'Human Research'."

Lyra hangs her head down in shame muttering damn it over and over again.

"Now then, Trixie knows how much you all have been pining for Trixie and Trixie understands, so in order to bring you more Great and Powerful Trixie, Trixie has decided to kidnap the author, locking him in the basement forcing him read Motherly Scootaloo from the very beginning till he gets his act together."


"NOOO GOD! NO GOD PLEASE NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Somewhere beneath Twilight and Trixie's basement. Some poor bastard was tied up in a chair with blood coming out of his eyes. "THIS IS PURE TORTURE! OH MY GOD! HELL HAS GOT TO BE MORE PLEASENT THAN THIS!"

"I don't know Rumble, I just don't want to date anybody right now."

"Bitch you cant hear? I said you was going on a date with me."

"Scoots, quit being a pussy and date him."

"Well if you don't Ah'm gonna." Scootaloo gives Apple Bloom a nasty glare. "Bitch that's what ah thought."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"


"Harsh." Lightning said.

"Now then, a recap of what happened since our last chapter." Trixie takes off her cape holding it in the air. "Ta-dah!" Trixie flings her cape and a projector appeared as the crowd begins to applaud her trick. "Thank you, thank you Trixie loves you all!" taking off her hat in reaching inside looking for something. "Now where is- Ah-Ha!" she pulled out Spike and set him on the floor.

"What the?!" Spike said looking around. "How did I end up here?!"

"Spike, could you do Trixie a favor and operate the projector while Trixie does her recap?" Trixie asked putting on her hat.

Spike looks up at the show mare with a look of surprise. "Trixie?! But...How?"

"Magic, Spike." Trixie said with a wink. "Magic."

Not willing to question it any further, Spike walks over the projector still trying to figure out how did Trixie managed to pull him from Ponyville.

"Lights!"

Lightning Dust flies up to the catwalk turning dimming down the light as Trixie began to speak about the first slide. "Now, you remember that Trixie married Twilight Sparkle right? Slide!"

Spike grumbles pushing the button to change it to the next slide. "Well after Twilight cruelly left Trixie to discover what happened last night. Trixie had to go out and...Mingle with the townsponies. Slide!"

Spike pushes the button changing the slide to Twilight and Trixie doing something suggestive. "Wah! Spike change it! Change it now!"

Spike quickly pushes the button to change the slide to something more appropriate. "Ahem, Now while Trixie was out she met her new companions to form the new mane six. Slide!"

"Er, that was the last slide Trixie." Spike informed.

"Oh, well moving on!" she takes off her hat reaching down and pulls out a book. "But if you truly wish to know how Trixie puts up with Twilight you can buy my new tell all book called...Uh...Twilight." Trixie glances at the book displeased. "Probably should've came up with a better name. But! in Trixie's book you will find all the things Twilight does that annoy Trixie to no end. Only $9.99 at your local book store."

"Oh, so is that how it is Trixie?" Trixie's face turned ghost white as her husband Twilight Sparkle entered the stage with her friends looking quite amused.

"Aww damn." Lyra muttered.

"Twilight!" Trixie quickly hides the book back in her hat. "Uh, Trixie is very happy to see you here! And totally not shocked to see you here! Not at all!"

Twilight smiled as she walked up to Trixie. "So, I heard you wrote a book about me?"

"Book? Trixie knows not of what you speak." Trixie said giggling nervously as she looks back to her friends for assistance. "Friends, do you know of this book that Twilight speaks of?"

"You mean the one that you put in your hat?" Sea Swirl asked innocently.

Trixie stared blankly at Sea Swirl. "The next time Trixie asks a rhetorical question just smile ok?"

"Ok." Sea Swirl replied smiling.

Twilight circles around Trixie like a shark that found it's next meal. "No I insist, what kind of spouse would I be if I didn't read your hard work." using her magic Twilight makes the book appear before her. "Now let's see here.

Trixie gasps trying to retrieve her book from Twilight's possession. "No! Trixie demands that you do not read that book!"

"What's wrong baby?" Twilight mocked opening the book. "Are you afraid that they'll find out how you turn to putty if I nibble your ears?"

Lightning Dust and Blazer covered their mouths trying to contain their laughter at Trixie's expense.

"W-What?!" Trixie balked. "Trixie is the dominant one in this marriage!"

"Oh really? Then why am I always on top during the love making?" Twilight smirked.

"Oh my." Bon Bon's face turned red while Lyra was on the floor rolling with laughter crying her eyes out.

Trixie entire coat went from blue to red eyes franticly looking around for a comeback. "Uh...Uh..."

"Or when I whisper sweet nothings in your ear making your legs shake?"

"Welp, that's all the time we have for today!" Trixie shouted. "We'll see you in the next chapter of Ugh, What Happened Last Night where The Great and Powerful Trixie finally takes her role as the star!"

"Speaking of stars, remember when you said that-"

"SHUT UP TWILIGHT!"

Ugh, What Happened Last Night? 3 Trixie Edition

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Meanwhile back in Ponyville. Trixie and her friends were sitting at a local café enjoying some small talk after having a singing session at the local karaoke bar. And by small talk I mean that they where making fun of Spike and his horrific singing voice.

"Trixie has never heard such terrible singing before in her life." Trixie said looking at the young dragon. "Trixie now understands why Twilight forbade you from singing."

Spike just huffs in annoyance and crosses his arms.

"So what shall we do now?" Trixie asks her friends. "Trixie is up for anything!"

"I'm good with anything." Lightning Dust said leaning on the table. "I'm really not in the mood to grade papers."

Blazer nodded along agreeing with Lightning Dust.

"We could go The Pint Noir and get plastered." Lyra suggested.

"Trixie doesn't think that's a good idea, plus its like three in the afternoon." Trixie informed. "Lest we end up like Twi Twi."

Spike slowly turned his head at Trixie. "Twi Twi?"

"The Great and Powerful Trixie's pet name for Twilight!" Trixie replied chuckling to herself. "What do you think Spike?"

The young dragon mouth slowly opens agape, stunned at Trixie's pet name for Twilight. Trixie closes his mouth and pats him on the head. "Yes, Trixie does come up with the best names doesn't she Spike?" Trixie said patting her chest. "Although Trixie cant help but wonder what Twi Twi is up to?"


Meanwhile, Twilight and her friends were busy running for their lives from a terrible red fuzzy monster. "Run girls!" Twilight screamed. "RUN!"

"YOU WILL TICKLE ELMO... OR DIE!!"


"I'm sure she's alright." Spike said waving a claw.

Lyra suddenly slams her hooves with a huge smile. "Oh yeah! I forgot that you and Twilight tied the knot. How did you manage to get the reclusive one to marry you?"

"Lyra!" Bon Bon scolded.

"What?" Lyra replied shrugging. "We called Twilight the reclusive one back in Canterlot. Like she would not leave the grand library unless Princess Celestia told her to."

"Trixie hopes she's still not mad at us for waking her up." Trixie said sheepishly. "Even though it was all Twi Twi's idea."

"Princess Celestia is known to be quite grumpy if she's woken up before a certain time." Lyra replied. "I remember one time when I made the tactical error of waking her up to tell her that I saw a human appear in my room one night. Sure it may have been a tree's shadow but I still believe that they are out there, watching our every-MMPHH!"

Before Lyra could continue her tirade about humans, Bon Bon shoved a pill in her mouth. "I'm the goddamned Batman." Lyra said before passing out on the table snoozing lightly while Bon Bon gently stroked her mane.

"Sorry about that." Bon Bon apologized. "I hate it when she goes off on a tangent and speaks of these mythical human creatures, specially when she sets the mood and I have to cockblock myself."

Trixie gasps and covers Spike's ears glaring at Bon Bon. "Bon Bon!" Trixie scolded. "There is a child present! What would Twi Twi say if sweet, innocent Spike repeated what you said?!"

Spike sighs loudly while removing Trixie's hooves from his head. "Trixie, I'm not a child. I'm twenty-one years old."

"You're twenty-one?!" Trixie gasped. "But you don't look any different than the last time Trixie saw you."

"Oh, yeah, that. Well you see, dragons take a very long time to age naturally and the last time I grew up I was on the half hour special of Hoarders so that's out. Princess Celestia said that due to my profession as Twilight's personal assistant, I may become an elder dragon." Spike explained.

"Oooh I've heard about them!" Blazer exclaimed. "Very wise, very old and very powerful dragons. I've heard that there's one elder dragon that's older than the Princesses themselves."

"Oh, Trixie hopes that we don't encounter such a creature." Trixie notices that her friends are looking at her with dull expressions. "Yeah, Trixie feels that Trixie just may have jinxed this too."

They all began laughing while Lyra mumbled something about dancing on rainbows. "Hey Lightning," Blazer muttered while nudging her best friend with a sly smile. "Look who just showed up and look who he's with." following the gaze of her friend, Lightning face soon turns into a sly smile as well. "Try not to embarrass him too hard Lightning." Blazer suggested.

"Come now Blazer, its just some light teasing." Lightning replied. "Yo! Rain Catcher!" a blue pegasus stallion turns around to sound of his name. Lightning Dust could see him mutter an oh no as he walked over to her. "Girls, I would like you to meet my nephew Rain Catcher."

"Trixie greets the one known as Rain Catcher." Trixie greeted.

"Good afternoon." Bon Bon replied next. "My name is Bon Bon."

"But I don't want another gingersnap grandma." Lyra muttered in her sleep.

Bon Bon rolls her eyes at the still unconscious Lyra. "And that is my marefriend Lyra."

"Hello, I'm Sea Swirl."

"Sup." Spike greeted lifting his head up a little.

Trixie glances down at Spike. "And his name is Spike. So, you're Lightning's nephew?"

"Well, something like that." Rain Catcher replied a little too quickly. "Well it was nice meeting you all but I must be going now." before he could make a quick escape Lightning wraps a hoof around him bringing him close.

"Now now RC, I thought I taught you better manners." Lightning replied with that sly smile again. "Unless you and your date have better things to do today."

Rain Catcher's face turned bright red. "Uh, date? What date? I'm not on a date." he silently wished that something would for something get him out of this situation.

But today was not the day.

"There you are!" a voice called out making Lightning smirk and Rain Catcher slam his head on the table. "I go to the little mare's room for five minutes and you disappear on me! You better have gotten our drinks!"

"That one." Lightning Dust said looking back. "Sup Scootaloo."

"Lightning Dust?!" Scootaloo gasped. "I-I mean, hello Lightning Dust. Uh, we were just getting some breakfast."

"But its three in the afternoon." Sea Swirl told her.

"Oh, guess we did kind of oversleep last night." Scootaloo muttered to herself. Unfortunately for her, she was just close enough for Lightning Dust and Blazer to hear.

Now the fun was about to begin. "Overslept? Why Scootaloo, you didnt stay the night over Rain Catcher's place after the wedding did you?" Blazer added joining in on the fun as Scootaloo face turned beet red in response. "Why I think you did, didn't you?"

"Hey RC." Lightning said nudging her nephew. "I know you wrapped it before you tapped it right?"

"Okay!" Rain Catcher shouted. "Well it was nice meeting you all gotta go bye!" he quickly shoves Scootaloo away while Lightning and Blazer began laughing.

"Your nephew is quite the shy one isn't he?" Bon Bon asked.

"Yep, he embarrasses easily. "Lightning agreed. Bon Bon was about to reply until the girls heard a strange beeping noise. "What's that sound?"

Bon Bon quickly stood up walking over to the restrooms. "Sea Swirl, could you watch Lyra for me? I uhhh have to use the little mare's room." quickly rushing to the restrooms, Bon Bon takes one of the empty stalls and pulls out a small black watch and presses a button.

Greetings Dancing Shadow. We have a new mission for you.

"Dancing Shadow?" Bon Bon replied confused. "No, I'm Shadow Dancer."

...Oh...My bad.

The cream colored mare sighs angrily as she cut off her communicator. "That's the sixth time this week! Whoever this Dancing Shadow is must be quite the agent."

Shadow Dancer report in.

Bon Bon clears her throat. "This is Shadow Dancer reporting."

Status update Agent Shadow Dancer.

"The ponies remain blissfully unaware of the existence of human beings. I'm continuing surveillance of the pony known as Lyra Heartstrings."

Excellent work Agent Shadow Dancer. Continue your mission.

"Yes sir!" Bon Bon replied before turning off her communicator. "They must never know that humans exist." shaking the thoughts from her mind Bon Bon leaves the restrooms and returns to her friends. "Hey guys, what I'd miss?"

"The Great and Powerful Trixie was about to tell the story on how Twi Twi and Trixie got married. "Trixie replied. "Ah, Trixie remembers it like was yesterday."

"Trixie, it was yesterday." Spike noted dully.

"Yes, Trixie remembers like it was yesterday. Twi Twi and her friends had just woken Trixie from her slumber."


"What?! Sparkle and friends?! Trixie gasps as she watches Twilight and her friends stumble around. "Why have you woken Trixie? And why are you here? But most importantly, why have you woken Trixie?!"

Twilight looks up at Trixie in her drunken daze and proceeded to throw up on her shirt. The blue unicorn just stared at Twilight. "Ok, eww." using her magic Trixie removes Twilight's shirt and tosses it away. "What ails you Sparkle?"

Twilight stared at Trixie with a huge smile and fell on the ground. "Hmm, its a good thing that The Great and Powerful Trixie took five years of medical school." Trixie said to herself. Looking over Twilight and her friends for whatever made them act this way. "The Great and Powerful Trixie has finished her examination! And Trixie has deuced that you and your friends are completely drunk. Now that Trixie thinks about it, that probably would explain the alcoholic smell."

"Hhhhhhheyyyy Mrixie." Pinkie stammered. "Look what I can do." Pinkie tried to do something but all she succeeded in doing was landing on her face.

"Yep, completely drunk." Trixie said shaking her head. "But not to worry! The Kind and Humble Trixie shall let you stay the night at Trixie's humble abode." Rainbow Dash stumbled over to Trixie wagon and accidentally bumped it causing it to roll off a cliff. Trixie annoyingly pulls a hoof down her face. "That is what Trixie gets for putting those blasted wheels back on. Oh how can it get any worse!"

Trixie looks up at the sky waiting for something to happen. "I said, HOW CAN IT GET ANY WORSE!" sometime later a pegasus pony flew down from the sky in landed in front of Trixie panting heavily.

"Sorry, but the rainstorm was pushed back until next week." with his message delivered the pegasus flew back into the sky.

"Well, that was a bust." Trixie complained kicking a small rock. "So much for Trixie's sympathy moment, well since my only home is down the cliff, Trixie shall escort you to Las Pegasus, hopefully they have a hotel open somewhere."

"Whoohoo Las Pegasus! Party time!" Rarity shouted. "Lets get wasted!" the girls tried to take off but Trixie held them in place with her magic.

"Yeah no." Trixie replied shaking her hoof. "We are going to Las Pegasus for you to sleep. Not to go on some wacky drunken adventure like The Hangover."

"Oh yeah?!" Rainbow asked. "Well what are you goina do bout it?"

Trixie smiles deviously at the drunken girls. "Trixie is glad you asked."


Walking down the brightly colored streets of Las Pegasus with the girls in tow, Trixie chuckles at her brilliance. "Ha, dog collars, It's a good thing Trixie kept these things from her time as a dog whisper."

"Ooooh, dog collars. I know what to do." Fluttershy stomps her hoof on the ground unlocking the collars.

"What the hell?! Uh, Trixie means, WHAT THE HELL?!" before Trixie could grab the drunken girls, they scattered off in different directions leaving the poor unicorn alone. "Ok Trixie, don't panic don't panic, its just six drunk out the ass mares lose in Las Pegasus!" Trixie pulls out a brown paper bag and breathes into it. "Oh why didn't Trixie listen to her mother and became a foalsitter!"

"Hi Trixie." Trixie turns around where Twilight Sparkle stood with a very big bag. Trixie grabs her pulling Twilight in for a hug. "Twilight likeies."

"Oh Twilight!" Trixie exclaimed very relived. Until she saw the bag. "Wait, what's in the bag?" taking the bag Trixie opens it up and finds a lot of bits. "Twilight...Where did you get this?"

"I don't know." Twilight chuckled. "I just found it."

Trixie stared at Twilight. "You...Found it?"

"Yep!"

Trixie blinks a couple of times before sitting down on the pavement. "Aww shit. Trixie regrets saying what could go wrong earlier." then out of nowhere, it began to rain heavily drenching to two unicorns in rain water.

"Oh there you are! I messed up." the pegasus from earlier descended from the sky wearing a raincoat. Trixie glares at the poor pegasus making him take a step back. "Oh, so I see it raining already. Well looks like my job is done." he takes off in the sky again while Twilight and Trixie sat in the rain.

"Sigh, Trixie should have been a barber instead."


Omake

Ladies and Gentlemen put your hands together for Twilight and Trixie!

Music fanfare and applause

Twilight and Trixie enter the stage waving at the crowd. "Thank you thank you Trixie loves you all!"

"My wife everybody, always the show-off." Twilight said. Trixie replied by sticking her tongue at her. "Anyway, we hoped you enjoyed this story as much as the author enjoyed writing it."

"So the story is almost over then, right Twi Twi?"

"That's correct, uh, Trix. But we wanted to end this story on a high note so, from now on the wackiness will be turned up to eleven!"

"But that's like two levels higher than Super Smash Bros!" Trixie gasped.

"So, turn off your logic caps cause this shit is about to make less sense than Motherly Scootaloo." Twilight said.

"Is that even still a thing?" Trixie replied. "I mean its so bad it makes Twilight look good." Twilight glares at Trixie. "You know I meant the book."

"So, look forward to that! Oh! before we forget, someone made a request that Trixie and I do a little tutoring session. You probably know what's gonna happen right? Here's a hint a sexy blue unicorn flank is about to meet my ruler."

"Yep, that was totally not sexual." Trixie said looking away blushing. "Not at all!"

"So if you would like to see that let a pony know, ok?" Twilight grabs Trixie looking in her eyes. "You know you want to."

"W-w-why are you so sexually active?!" Trixie questioned.

"I was sexually repressed for a long time. The keyword there...Was." Twilight smiled. "The things I'm going to do to you. So that's all the time we have for today, I'm going to borrow Trixie for an hour maybe three. So enjoy the rest of the story."

Trixie's Night Out

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We rejoin our two mares Trixie and Twilight as they are about to be dipped in boiling acid. "Nice job Twilight!" Trixie shouted. "All you had to do was just kiss him!"

"But he is sooo ugly." Twilight replied. "He's so ugly that Scorpion told him to stay over there."

"Really?! Twilight we are about to take an acid bath!" Trixie said struggling against the ropes. "And Trixie prefers bubble baths NOT acid ones!" Trixie hung her head low looking at the vat of acid. "Ok Trixie! Think! Just use your Great and Powerful magic!" focusing her magic, Trixie tries to expand the rope but all it did was crush them.

"Ok, too tight!" Trixie gasped. "Going to pop like overripe zit!" Trixie disperses her magic allowing them to breath again. "Ok, that wasn't Trixie's finest hour."

Twilight looks back at Trixie in her drunken daze. "Don't worry! I got a plan." Twilight takes out a cell phone and begins dialing a number. "I seen this on Naruto...Hey James its Twilight, look we're in bit of a jam can you help a pony out?...Yea...Mmhn...Ok cool thanks...Ok...Bye." Twilight hangs up her phone and put it away. "Our savior should be busting through those doors right about."

The twin doors suddenly exploded and a yellow pegasus enters the room. "Now." Twilight finished as Trixie squealed with excitement. "Fluttershy! Oh how very convenient for you to show up here but Trixie is not going to complain about it! Please help us!"

Fluttershy slowly stumbles to the gang of stallions who had Twilight and Trixie suspended in the air. "You let my friends go right now...or else."

"Or else what?" one of the gang members laughed.

Fluttershy smirks devilishly. "I glad you asked! COME TO ME MY JUNGLE FRIENDS!" A bunch of animals soon came busting through the door surrounding the gangsters growling.

"You just had to open your mouth didn't you?" another gang member said.

Fluttershy commanded her animal friends to attack them while she and her bird companions rescued Trixie and Twilight. "Trixie appreciates you coming to help us! Even though Trixie had it all under control." Trixie glances back to where the animals were completely decimating the gang members. "Uh, Trixie thinks we should leave."

One of the members slowly crawled out of the battle and tried to make his way to the door but was stopped by a giant gorilla who just smiled at him. "It's time." he said.

The stallions ears dropped down terrified. "For?"

"This hot gorilla dick." and began to drag the poor stallion away who was trying in vain to escape and begging for help.

"Isn't nature fascinating?" Fluttershy smiled.


After escaping the building with the help of Fluttershy. Trixie and Twilight continued their search for the four other drunken idiots somewhere in the city. Well Trixie mostly, Twilight and Fluttershy wanted to head to the nearest nightclub to continue their night of debauchery.

"Pwwweasse Trixie!" Twilight begged. "We promise that we'll be good."

But Trixie just shook her head, the last thing she wanted was for them to get even more drunk. "No! We have to find your companions before they end up in some stallions bed or worse."

"Dead?" Fluttershy asked.

"No, before they somehow enter in some second rate clop-fic or wander to Rule 34." Trixie replied. "It happened to Trixie once." before Trixie could tell that story two stallions exited from one of the many nightclubs in Las Pegasus.

"That new white mare is quite the pole dancer."

"I never seen a proper mare move so, so elegantly, so majestic and that lavender mane, she was the perfect mare."

"Not to mention her proper speaking voice." they walk away while talking about that white mare."

"Well its a good thing that Trixie doesn't know of anypony by that description. Come on you two lets-" Trixie finds that Twilight and Fluttershy have sneaked inside the building while Trixie wasn't looking. "Why does Trixie even bother?" Trixie mumbled while walking inside. "Reminds Trixie of her security guard job."

Trixie pushes past the crowd of ponies and loud music searching for Twilight and Fluttershy. "Trixie swears if they're by the bar." glancing over to the bar she found the two ponies in question sitting at the bar drinking. "Twilight and Fluttershy! What did Trixie tell you about staying close to Trixie!"

Twilight and Fluttershy looked at each other then back at Trixie. "What?" unfortunately the music was so loud that they didn't hear a single word the blue unicorn mare said.

"Trixie said, don't disappear on Trixie again!"

"What?"

"DONT DISAPPEAR ON TRIXIE AGAIN!"

Unfortunately for Trixie, she decided you scream right at the moment the club fell silent and everypony was looking at her. "Trixie, Trixie, Trixie, calm down. Here, sit next to me." Twilight pulls Trixie down to the seat next to her. "Have a drink and enjoy yourself."

"Trixie don't know if she should drink." Trixie said looking down at the glass. "Trixie had some...issues with drinking in the past."

Twilight grabbed the glass forced the light brown liquid down Trixie's throat. "Mmm good isn't it?" Twilight asked. Trixie doesn't say anything back, she just sits back and relax. "Good, good." Twilight said waving her hoof. "Let the booze flow through you."

"Booze, it's liquid bread, it's good for you." Fluttershy added.

The lights dim down except a single beam of light on center stage. Mares and Gentlestallions put your hooves together for the graceful pole dance of Lady Striperella The curtains open and slow music began playing. "Pole dancing? Mares? Why are there mares in a place for stallions?" Trixie asked looking around.

A huge white elephant slowly dances her way out to the pole grabbing it and lifting her leg in the air. "W-What the absolute hell am I looking at?" Trixie said. "Guys, seriously. What is this?"

"Oh my, to lewd for me." Fluttershy said looking away. "SHAKE WHAT YOUR MAMA GAVE YA! WHOO WHOO WHOO WHOO WHOO WHOO!"

"I didn't think Las Pegaus had places like this." Twilight said looking at the scene before her. "Welp, it's a good thing that I'm pretty hammered right now and wont remember a thing or I would be shocked about this."

Trixie slams her hooves on the table. "An elephant is pole dancing! This is such a disservice to Trixie's former position!"

"You were a pole dancer?" Twilight asked.

"Trixie...was a lot of things." Trixie replied standing up walking over to the stage. "Now watch as Zatanna comes out of retirement!"

"Her stage name was Zatanna?" Fluttershy said glancing at Twilight who just shrugged in response.

Trixie walked on to the stage forcefully tossing the elephant dancer off the stage with her magic. "Watch, as Lady Zatanna fills your eye sockets with pole dancing taught by Bayonetta! D.J! Hit me!" Trixie quickly ducks her head to avoid the record player from hitting her. "Zatanna meant play her a song you dipshit!"

"My bad!"

"Now then, be amazed at Zatanna's legendary Umbran Pole Dance!" before she could start her dance somepony blew up the front doors to the club. "Now what?!"

A pink earth pony stood in the smoke wearing a yellow zoot suit with a feather in her hat and a wide smile on her face. "SSSSmokin."