EPISODE 145 - All Bottled Up

Starlight smiled far wider than normal, more trying to convince herself everything was okay than convincing Trixie. Her thoughts were interrupted by... Herself... When she was flattened to the castle floor.

“Hi again!” Starlight smiled to her past self, this smile actually real, not a facade she had thrown up. She popped up from the floor like a piece of popcorn, and started talking without sparing a moment. “Gotta be snappy on this one. You just 'graduated’ from being Twilight's student, I honestly expected better of, well, myself. Don't bottle up your feelings, friends are for talking to, they aren't ponies who don't annoy you, they're ponies worth forgiving over and over. So how about instead of pretending everything is okay, you actually talk to Trix!”

Past Starlight sighed as she got up from the crystal floor, her head hung low in both exhaustion and shame. “You really don't sugarcoat it, do you?”

“I'm you, when have we ever sugarcoated anything?”

“... Good point. So is that it?” She raised and eyebrow, hoping it was so simple.

Future Starlight's horn glowed, and the Friendship Map appeared in the air, falling and landing hard on the crystalline floor with a thunderous crash. She didn't even flinch. “You were missing that I believe. It was in the spa, in case you were wondering.”

“Thanks... I think. What should I do with this?” The bottle containing Starlight's negatively charged magical energy floated from the saddlebag, and between the two Starlights. Angry red swirled inside the small glass bottle, sparking aggressively.

Future Starlight eyed the bottle, groaning at her own stupidity. “First of all, glass, really? If you're gonna bottle up your emotions don't do it in a breakable glass bottle you idiot. Second.” She slapped the bottle out of the air, letting it shatter on the floor to prove her first point. The swirling magic immediately flowed into her past self, disappearing without harming anypony else. “You're cleaning that up by the way, since that wouldn't happen with plastic.”

Starlight hissed as she reabsorbed the angry magic, her eyes narrowing. “We're a real jerk, what in Tartarus was that for?!”

A boop silenced any further anger. “You're cute when you're angry, now go tell Trixie how you actually feel instead of pulling off this stupidity.”

Their ears both swiveled at the sound of hoofsteps belonging to a certain blue magician. “Starlight? Where are you? I thought you were right behind me!”

“Remember, friends aren't perfect, but they're worth forgiving over and over. Let them know how you feel, otherwise your feelings build up and explode. Oh, and when you're done hugging and kissing or whatever, you two can share these.” Future Starlight disappeared, leaving a large bucket of cinnamon nuts in her place, just as Trixie rounded the corner.

“There you are Starli-... are those cinnamon nuts?”

Starlight growled and marched towards Trixie, about to lay into the mare harder than she ever had before.

6529455

Starlight Fixes Fluttershy Leans In

Starlight Fixes Fluttershy Leans In

It was midday when Starlight popped next to Fluttershy’s cottage, a flash of blue magic as usual announcing her appearance into the physical world. Of course, she picked a perfect time to go to this particular event. If she was correct, Fluttershy was currently coming home from the Ponyville veterinarian office. This meant she had a moment to get ready at Fluttershy’s door.

Climbing through an open window, Starlight let herself into her friend’s home. The place was well-kept, with the usual pet and animal food or beds laying around. However, none of that was relevant to her. She needed to get ready for Fluttershy coming home so she could stop her from wasting time with the ‘experts’.

Not a moment too soon, Fluttershy opened the door to her home, only to find none other than Starlight Glimmer standing next to the front door. This startled the pegasus, making her jump and gasp. “S-Starlight, what are you doing here?!” Fluttershy half-screamed.

“Not important, Fluttershy. Just listen. I know you have an animal issue you want to solve. Did you call the others here?” Starlight asked.

“Uh, yes, but how do you know that?”

“Again, not important. Just realize I’m trying to help. They’re going to recommend some experts to help you with the project, but they’re not who you need.” Starlight addressed.

“O-oh my… This is all a little much! How do you know all this?”

“Well, just understand it involves some complicated time-altering magic. Anywho, just ask our friends, and me, to help. I’ll be available later on. Don’t say anything about our talk here. Oh, and you should also ask Big Daddy McColt for some help!”

“I’m not sure what to think about all this, Starlight… But, I suppose you may be right. That sounds like a good plan.”

“It is! Just, uh, trust me on it, okay?” Starlight reassured Fluttershy that things would go smoothly.

After that, Starlight left to find a place to take herself through time somewhere in the Everfree Forest, leaving Fluttershy to take the path she wanted all along without having to spend time with the ‘experts’ in the way and making a large mess of everything.

Starlight Fixes The Perfect Pear

The Timberwolves were closing in.

“I think this is it, Pear Butter whispered. “Are you scared?”

“Not as long as you’re next to me,” Bright Mac replied. “I love you, Buttercup.” The two huddled close together, waiting for the end. The Timberwolves prepared to pounce.

*BOOM!*

Reality cracked and warped in front of them. The wolves reared back in confusion. A purple mare appeared before them, casting a shield spell around them. Silhouetted by sparks of lightning, she turned to face the two terrified ponies and reached out a hoof. “Come with me if you want to live.”

---

Applejack had just finished hauling a fresh load of harvested apples into the barn when she appeared.

“Starlight Glimmer! What an unpleasant surprise! Let me guess, you’re here from the future to make my life difficult. Well go on, get it over with. Solve my problem and let me get on with my harvest!”

But Starlight looked different this time. Her face was blank, as if trying to hide some deep emotion. “Applejack, I have two ponies I’d like you to meet.” And from around the corner, two ponies trotted.

AJ gasped, falling to her knees. “M-mom? Dad?”

The ponies in question also gasped. “Applejack--is… is it really you?” Bright Mac said, tears rapidly forming in his eyes.

****
Okay, so here’s what I want to do but don’t feel I’m a skilled/focused enough writer to do without some help. It’s loosely inspired by an episode of Doctor Who I watched long ago called Father's Day.

Basically, Bright Mac and Pear Butter are brought to the present day (Season 7) and get to meet the Apple Family, and at first everything is amazing, if a bit odd, as they are only a few years older than Big Mac. But one day, out of nowhere, a Timberwolf attacks the farm, nearly killing Applebloom in the process. Everyone is puzzled, but brush it off as a freak occurrence. Then just when things are settling down again, another two attack, this time seriously injuring Big Mac. Starlight starts to suspect her messing with time has something to do with this.

Then, the next day, an entire pack attacks the farm. The family takes refuge in the cellar, but Pear Butter and Bright Mac realize that the timberwolves are after them specifically. They aren’t supposed to be alive, and the forces of time are trying correct this fact. Despite their family’s protestations, they insist that their time has come, but they are glad they got to spend a few more days with their kids and parents, and that they’re so proud of the family the Apples have become. As the Timberwolves are about to break the cellar door down, the two ponies open it and are ripped to shreds, but the Timberwolves then disappear, as do Big Mac’s injuries and the damages to the farm.

In a final scene, Starlight Glimmer visits their gravestone in Ponyville cemetery, and notes that their date of death has been changed. She wonders if her meddling with time has gone too far this time.

Would somepony be interested in taking this over for me or collabing?

Starlight Fixes Discord
Ep 155: Discordant Harmony

An urgent burst of magic flashed in Discord’s kitchen and Starlight Glimmer crashed through it, screeching to a halt amid twin trails of fire. “Okay! Only have 30 seconds to fix this!” She hissed.

Behind her, Discord, dressed in a pink cowpony outfit flew out of the portal.

Starlight turned to him. “We have to fix the present! But don’t let either of our past selves see us!”

She peeked into the living room and saw Fluttershy and a well-dressed, if slightly transparent, Discord staring in shock at something. Starlight - her past self - was also there, gesturing wildly at a young, butter-colored draconequis (also see-through) in a red down vest, shouting, “It’s your kid! Something gotta be done about your kid!”

Starlight - current Starlight - retreated to the kitchen. The only door out of the room was through the living room. She looked at Discord - current Discord - for a beat, and they nodded to each other in unison and lept through the window - the currently closed window.

As quickly and as quietly as they could, they snuck around the side of the cottage. They carefully sidled under the living room window where they could hear Past Starlight shouting at Past Discord. “Look at yourself! You’re fading away! And because of that, Eris here is fading away too! At all your other tea parties, did Fluttershy fall in love with a boring nerd?”

“L-l-love?” Fluttershy stammered.

“No!” Past Starlight barked. “She wants the god of chaos! So act like it, dummy!”

Now safely around the other side of the house, Starlight and Discord crawled into a bedroom window. From the other room, they could hear Past Starlight. “Here, take this and play it. Your kid is gonna love it.” There was a “PFF!” sound and a sudden smell of pizza.

The pair was barely into the bedroom when Flim appeared in a flash of light, carrying a copy of Starlight’s time travel spell she’d carelessly left unguarded. He reached for a book on the bedside table titled “Bay’s Sports Almanac: Complete Rodeo and Race Statistics 950-1000”. With a loud “BIFF!” Starlight socked Flim in the jaw, sending him sailing right back through his own time portal.

“Mission complete,” Starlight nodded to Discord. “It’s time to split.”

Discord just frowned. “Why was I even here?” And they both disappeared in a puff of magic.

In the living room, Past Discord began to strum his new red guitar to the tune of “Earth Angel”. Bunny Angel covered his ears as he ate a slice of pepperoni.

Starlight Fixes Babysitting Part 2: Electric Boogaloo
Ep 162: It Isn't the Mane Thing About You

Rarity casually sauntered into Sugarcube Corner. “Pinkie, I need one of your confections to put Photo Finish in a good mood. And no-”

“PFF!” There was a flash of light and suddenly Starlight Glimmer stood in the middle of the bakery with a rolled up stack of papers.

“Oh,” Rarity puzzled, “Am I interrupting?”

Pinkie grinned, gesturing to the decorations around the shop and Cake twins, each with their own cupcake. “We were just-”

“NO!” Starlight barked. “We were celebrating NOTHING.” She lit her horn and the decorations all disappeared, including the babies’ cupcakes, down to the candles. The twins began to bawl for their lost treats.

“Hey!” cried Pinkie in a rare moment of indignation.

“Hey is for horses!” Starlight responded.

“But we ARE h-”

“No! Bad Pinkie!” Starlight swatted the earth pony on the rump with her rolled up papers. “We don’t spray our friends and tiny infants with industrial caulk. Or scrub baked goods with industrial-grade solvents. Bad! I SPECIFICALLY told Cadence you wouldn't do this EXACT thing!"

She sighed. "And honestly, who celebrates the anniversary of a sneeze? Seriously. I'm sorry to be violent, but it was this or spend weeks traveling backward countless times and preventing the twins from sneezing for the first thirteen years of their lives. Ain't nopony got time for that!”

Pinkie opened her mouth to defend herself but never got the chance. Starlight unrolled her papers and held them up. On them were pictures of things like a mane with bubbles and an X’d out bottle of glue with a skull and crossbones.

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I have about 15 seconds to pay Zecora a visit. Just because she’s illiterate, that’s no excuse to not label identical-looking potions with completely opposite, sometimes harmful effects.” With that, she teleported away.

Nopony moved for a moment. “You mean we don’t even get a pizza?” Pinkie snorted. The twins continued to wail.

Rarity blinked. “Um. I’ll come back later.”

"Y'know what?" Applejack declared after emitting one of those 'poing's that meant she'd just had a fantastic idea. "I am gonna help Rarity judge her show!"

VLWORP, said the universe, as a pink unicorn appeared in the orchard where none had been previously.

Big Macintosh and Apple Bloom let out shouts of anguished surprise, but AJ just hung her head, her previous enthusiasm deflating.

"Or I guess I won't," she mumbled at the ground, "on account of it's a bad idea an' somethin'll go majorly wrong if'n I do."

"Oh, Applejack," Starlight cried, throwing a friendly foreleg around her neck, "don't be like that! Just because I showed up now doesn't mean I'm here to ruin your fun!" She chuckled and whispered into Applejack's ear. "Trust me, judging this fashion show will score beaucoup points with Rarity. No way would I mess that up for you!"

Applejack's head snapped up, a pink tinge on her cheeks.

"Get it?" Starlight said with a grin, poking her in the ribs. "Score? D'you see what I did there?"

"I am sure I have no idea what you are talking about, Starlight Glimmer," AJ said, her voice thin and strangely high-pitched.

"All right, but joking aside." Starlight pulled AJ closer and motioned for her siblings to leave them some privacy. "What I came to do is simply remind you of a very. Important. Thing."

"Oh yeah?" Applejack raised an eyebrow, trying and failing to divest herself from Starlight's grasp. "And what might that be?"

"Oh, you know..." A pink hoof waved vague circles in the air. "Just a little something you value highly. What might it be again..."

Applejack, now fully tangled in Starlight's web, wagered a, "Family?"

"Hmm, no, not quite..."

"Farmin'? Honesty?" AJ narrowed her eyes. "Don't tell me it's apples. That's typecastin', an' you know it."

"No, no, no, no, no." Starlight hemmed and hawed. "Starts with an H?"

"Honesty again?" said Applejack, bewildered.

"No, no, not like 'honesty', you can't hear it. Haaa?

"Haaa..."

"Haaa, harrrr..."

"Har-dee-har, Starlight." Applejack grunted. "Lemme go."

"Hard work." Starlight's voice was a sledgehammer. "Hard work, Applejack."

Out of all the ponies in Equestria, there are few who could match Applejack for strength and endurance. Bulk Biceps springs immediately to mind, but he spends his every moment of spare time lifting anything -- and anyone -- heavy he can find in his vicinity. That's the kind of effort and dedication it takes to equal an earth pony who spends her every waking moment kicking hardwood trees, from sunup to sundown, in a field suffused by her and her family's magic.

You can't match earth ponies for strength. Doubly so when they put their minds to having it. Endlessly so when generations of them have tilled a patch of earth for nearly a hundred years, imbuing it with their life essences even as they harvest its life-giving bounty. A magical feedback loop of that sort only serves to strengthen itself, burgeoning over and over and over again as toil, sweat and love are poured into its surroundings. That's earth pony magic. That's hard work.

Which is why, when Starlight cranked her hoof around Applejack's neck, and Applejack found herself held fast in place by a unicorn mare approaching middle age whose hobbies included finding ways to get other ponies to do anything even remotely strenuous so she could avoid doing it herself, Applejack knew at last the meaning of fear.

"Fashion is hard work," hissed Starlight into Applejack's ear. "You may not appreciate the outcomes, but designers and clothes horses put as much effort into making their dresses as you do tending to this orchard. Kindly keep that in mind when you go to judge their work.

"Or so help me, Applejack.

"So help me, little green apples.

"I will break you."

Applejack believed she could.

Starlight released her suddenly, and AJ staggered and fell back onto her haunches with a frantic inrush of breath. She fanned herself with her hat, staring at Starlight with a mixture of fear and awe. For her part, Starlight Glimmer was all smiles, just as friendly and cheerful as could be.

"Just something to keep in mind!" she said airily. "That's all I wanted to say. Good luck judging the fashion show! Love you, kisses, byeeee!"

The universe turned itself inside-out with a haughty SHNORP, and Starlight was gone.

Applejack didn't sleep for a week. But she did score major points with Rarity.

168 & 169. Shadow Play

"Trying to steal our magic, Stygian?" Starswirl the Bearded accused of the other unicorn. He and the other Pillars had come to confront their 'friend' regarding the theft of their items. "I'm afraid you have left us no choice but to-"

Starlight Glimmer appeared in a flash of purple light.

"He wasn't-!" she said, and immediately keeled over onto the floor. "Ugh! And I thought traveling a few years to save the Apples was bad!" she groaned, clutching her sides. "A thousand years..." She looked up at the other ponies, Stygian and the Pillars. She knew she didn't have long. "He didn't want your magic, he wanted your respect!"

"It's true!" Stygian said. "I brought you together. I plan strategy. I read all I can about the beasts you face. But I don't have magic or strength. So no pony ever notices me. I was going to go to Ponehenge to make his own copies of the artifacts. With them, I thought I could be a Pillar too, and stand beside you in battle. I never wanted to steal your magic!"

"There... you understand now?" Starlight said to the Pillars as she wheezed. "Stygian doesn't have to get ostracized... The Pony of Shadows will never be summoned from Limbo..." She felt her time spell about to snap back. Starlight crawled over to a trash can and wretched into it.

"Miss, are you okay?" Mage Meadowbrook said as she and the others gathered around to help her.

Starlight was too weak to warn them to stay back.

It was too late.

In a flash of purple light, the entire group vanished, returning along with Starlight to her present time.

Starlight Fixes Maud's Social Life
Ep 147: Rock Solid Friendship

Pinkie was building to a full on freakout at the thought of her BSFF going to live in some boring canyon until she heard Maud say, “I'm giving Ponyville a chance.”

She sighed in relief. “Phew! So all I have to do is prove Ponyville has better rocks than Ghastly Gorge? Challenge accepted.”

Thwp! A faint whistling noise preceded a sharp sting on the back of her neck.

“Ow! Okay, Mr. Mosquito, that wasn’t very nice to bite me. And you’re waaaay out of season too. Now let’s go see Flushershisher nd blergle narm….” Pinkie slurred as her eyes rolled back into her head and she collapsed like a pink sack of potatoes.

Maud looked down at her, barely reacting. “Pinkie?”

A periwinkle unicorn popped out of a nearby bush, carrying a blowgun in her magic. “Hi, Maud! Nice to meet you. I’m Starlight.”

“What did you do to my sister?” Maud deadpanned.

Starlight backed up a bit, eyes wide. “Whoooa, calm down, girl. Pinkie’s fine. I just had to dart her. She’ll sleep it off in a couple days.”

Sure enough, there was a tiny pink dart sticking out of Pinkie’s neck. Starlight’s aura plucked it out before picking up the mare entirely.

“Why?”

Starlight waved a hoof. “Oh, you know Pinkie. She was gonna go overboard trying to get you to pick Ponyville and make this a whole thing. You know how she gets better than anypony.”

“Yes. She’s my sister.”

Starlight nodded. “Well, now you can get to know the town at your own pace without her hovering over you. You’ll become friends with me, and with Sunburst when he comes to visit. You’ll meet your coltfriend, Mudbriar. And of course, you’ll be near your sister.”

Maud simply stared.

Starlight continued. “Oh, and Ponyville has a decent cave system. There’s this beautiful subterranean grotto with some very interesting strata.”

Maud’s ear flicked marginally.

“Whoa, that got your attention!” Starlight smirked. She hefted Pinkie in her aura. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to go put the ADHDemon to bed. Go and find me. ...Errr, present me. Not ME-me. I’m from the future and- you know what, forget it. It’s a whole thing. Take my card.”

There was a flash and Starlight and Pinkie were gone. A sparkly business card fluttered to the ground in front of Maud. It read:

Starlight Fixes The Publishing Industry
Ep 157: Fame and Misfortune

“How would you girls feel about making our journal available for everypony?” Twilight proudly held the book aloft and she looked lovingly around the room at her very best friends. She thought of all the good their experiences could do the ponies of Equestria.  “If we can get these lessons into other ponies' hooves, maybe they'll benefit from them.”

Her friends all enthusiastically agreed. For about twenty seconds.

Then there was a burst of turquoise light and all copies of the book, save the worn original, were seemingly vaporized. The noise Twilight made was not equine.

“Whew,” exclaimed a voice from doorway. “Got here later than I would have liked, but I got that nipped in the bud just in the nick of time.”

Everypony save Twilight, still staring blankly in shock at the place where the books at been, turned to see Starlight Glimmer smiling smugly to herself. Six hooves met foreheads.

“You… you… destroyed…” Twilight stammered.

Starlight waved a hoof. “Oh, don’t worry, Twi. You know I’d never destroy a book. Especially YOUR book. ...At least not in front of you.”

This broke Twilight from her stupor. “What was that last part? Wait, never mind that. If you didn’t burn the journals, then where did they go?”

“You wouldn't want to publish that book in Equestria. Trust me,” Starlight assured her. “The public scrutiny and loss of privacy it would bring on you is just NOT worth it.”

“But think of all the good we could have done! The lessons we could teach!” Twilight gasped.

Starlight furrowed her brow. “Do you want analysts? Because that’s how you get analysts.” She rolled her eyes. “Besides, you want to teach friendship? Open up a school.”

Twilight rubber her chin thoughtfully. “A school…?”

“I was going to just change the names to protect the innocent and publish it anyway, but it wouldn’t have really worked. I mean, how many groups of friends are there that include Wonderbolts, famous fashionistas, and unicorns that have ascended to godhood recently? Dead giveaway.”

“So what did you do?” Twilight asked.

“I sent them to another dimension!” Starlight grinned.

“You what?”

“I sent them to a dimension where they can still do good and teach friendship but where none of the inhabitants can give you any trouble. Win-win!”

Twilight thought on that a moment. “Well, okay. As long as you promise its lessons will be taken seriously and it will be treated with the respect it deserves.”

“I promise,” Starlight assured her. She lit her horn to cast the temporal return spell.

But then she paused. “Oh, and one more thing. I changed the name of the author. Couldn’t have it look like one of the main characters wrote it herself. Now it was written by, uh, ‘Laurel Fast’? ‘Layer Fowst’? Something like that. Anyway, love ya, bye!”

EPISODE 150 - Parental Glideance
A drunk summary by yours truely.

WARNING THERE ARE TWO VERSIONS HERE

VERSION ONE

“More family drama, when will it end? Ugh.” Starlight snapped the friendship journal shut and stuck the landing on all four hooves upon falling out of the portal. She was on a cloud, just in time to catch Scootaloo in her magic as the flightless filly shot towards Cloudscale. “Gotcha! Starlight with the catch winning it for Sire's Hollow!”

Scootaloo watched the time traveler do a little hoof pump before becoming her center of attention. “Uhm. Hi Starlight, what are you doing up here?”

“Just playing a little catch with Rainbow's favorite stalker, seriously, this is reaching creepy levels of worship kid.” Starlight deadpanned, her expression not giving anything away either.

Scootaloo squirmed in the magical aura, her wings not doing much to help. “Hey! A little invasion of privacy never hurt anyone! Let me go!”

The unicorn snorted. “Yeah, okay. That's not why I'm here anyway, so listen up. Rainbow Dash has a complex relationship with her parents. They're crazy, and she's an idiot, so don't say anything about Dash joining the Wonderbolts and I won't have to tell Dash were her favorite panties went.”

Never had Starlight seen a pony turn red so quickly, it was almost concerning. “How do you kn-... Argh! Deal!”

“Good, I'm glad we understand each other.”

Starlight disappeared, her magic going with her just mere moments after catapulting Scootaloo the rest of the way to Cloudsdale.

VERSION 2

Wonderbolts and Rainbow relatives alike jumped back as the air crackled and sparked, the smell of pizza and ozone cut through the air. When the blinding light faded one Starlight Glimmer was standing in the grass to the side of the Wonderbolt's runway. “Okay kids, this is where it gets complicated.”

Spitfire was the first to regain her composure, though her body was still tensed up on adrenaline. “Look, I don't know who you are, but this is a restricted area, you can't ju-” She was stopped by a magical aura around her muzzle. “Not now spitball, I need to talk with Dash.”

Further behind the unicorn, Rainbow groaned and facehoofed. Hard.

When she released the hoof from her face, she found herself teleported across the runway along with Scootaloo. “Now what is it Starlight? I'm kinda in the middle of... Something.”

“What, aren't you happy to see me?” Starlight gave a mischievous smile, and turned her attention to Scootaloo. “As for you, first, stop invading Dash's privacy, you're stalking her so much it's creepy now, not cute. Second, maybe if you're gonna visit Rainbow's parents, you should tell Rainbow!”

Scootaloo shrank back a bit, unable to keep eye contact, but noticing the vein on Starlight's neck. “Sorry Starlight…”

“But you Rainbow Dash, how old are you again? I'm pretty sure you're an adult, so deal with your parents like an adult instead of hiding from them like a baby. This family drama is getting old fast, urgh!” The time traveler groaned in frustration, first Sweetie Belle and Rarity, now this? “Your parents are supporting you Dash, they're your biggest fans, maybe appreciate the amount of encouragement they give instead of brushing it off like some brat.”

Rainbow opened her mouth to reply, but there was a flash and Rainbow Dash had traded places with her parents, who shook their heads in confusion.

“Hi, I'm Starlight Glimmer, just here to help clear up a little misunderstanding. CALM. THE BUCK. DOWN. You can support your daughter, but tone it down just a bit so she doesn't lose her mind.” She leafed through the journal to the dog-eared page. “I mean, it says you launched fireworks, at an air show. Were you trying to kill Fleetfoot?”

Again, before a retort could leave their lips, they were teleported back to the group.

Starlight readied her spell, but had a last second thought. She shouted across the runway, to where Rainbow Dash stood with her family and slight team. “Hey Dash! You know those lacy black panties you're missing, ask your favorite stalker where they are!” Her mischievous grin returned.

“That should overshadow anything her parents might try. You're welcome.” She said to herself, and disappeared.

“Who was that pony?” Spitfire asked the newest Wonderbolt.

Rainbow Dash just sighed and facehoofed again.

Triple Threat
S7 E15 - Episode #158

"You invited Thorax over to Ponyville on the same day as Ember?!" Twilight whispered.

Spike moaned. "Apparently."

"That doesn't seem like a good idea," Starlight said. "How are you going to — oh, hello, Future Me."

T +10:

Twilight and Spike glanced up. Future Starlight smiled. Spike freaked.

"AAAAAAAAHHHH!" Spike shouted, starting to run in circles. "That means there's a friendship problem, I was right, Thorax and Ember are gonna start a war that could ruin Equestria as we know it —"

Future Starlight put a hoof on top of his head as he passed by and twisted slightly, straightening out his running path. Spike sprinted off into the suburbs of Ponyville, his wailing slowly receding.

"Uhh," Thorax said. "What was that about? And who's Ember?"

"You'll find out in about —" Future Starlight checked the timer on her pastern, where the second hand was sweeping past 14 — "four more seconds. As for you —" she pointed a hoof at her past self — "come with me."

Past Starlight saluted. "Check," she said, and the two of them vanished in a burst of teleportation.

Twilight double-facehoofed, whimpering. "Okay," she said, "with Starlight's arrival, now we're up from two crises to three. This day officially could not get any worse."

There was a moment of silence, as if the universe was holding its breath.

Twilight realized her mistake as Second 18 ticked off.

A herd of ponies stampeded past them, pursued by dark chitinous forms. "Changeling invasion!" the lead Flower Sister screamed.

There was a draconic roar of "Revenge!" from two blocks away, and a loud series of thumps. "OH SWEET CELESTIA, MY EVERYTHING," Spike wailed.

"Uhh, Twilight," Rainbow Dash said from her side, the speed lines of her sudden appearance fading away. "I kinda hate to pull you away from those problems, but your entire castle is on fire."

* * *

T +00:

Garble narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "You're offering me a free chance to give Spike the beating of his life. And you're even going to teleport me there."

"Yep!" Starlight said. "And not a single pony is going to do anything about it!"

Garble's eyes narrowed even further. "What's the catch?"

"You've only got one more second to agree," she said, eyes fixed on her watch.

"… Deal."

* * *

T +04:

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "YOU are offering to help me invade Ponyville. YOU."

"Yep!" Starlight said. "And I'm even going to —"

Chrysalis stepped forward. "Deal."

"— teleport you AND your army …" Starlight trailed off, looking up from her watch. "What?"

"Deal. Let's go."

Starlight opened and closed her mouth several times. Finally, she managed: "You're not going to ask what the catch is? You're not even going to hold out until I sweeten the deal with a distraction that will keep any pony from fighting back? You're just going to trust me, just like that?"

"Shut up. Every second we're here is another second I don't get sweet, sweet revenge."

At the mention of time, Starlight shook her head violently and looked back down at her watch. Two seconds longer than planned. She muttered a curse, refocused, and lit her horn.

* * *

T +14:

"Okay," Past Starlight said as they reappeared in the center of Twilight Sparkle's crystal palace. "What's the plan?"

"You have four seconds," Future Starlight said, "to incinerate this pile of ugly, and then take a one-week vacation to the Bahamares."

Past Starlight blinked.

Then grinned, and lit her horn.

* * *

T +18:

PEW! Future Starlight's time-travel spell ejected her half an hour forward. She took a moment to reorient.

Thorax and Ember were chatting animatedly as they strolled up to the smoldering foundations which used to be the Friendship Palace — where the sooty, singed Mane Six were collapsed on the heat-withered front lawn.

"You know," Ember said, "that was really awesome how you turned into a bear and mauled Garble to within an inch of his life."

Thorax blushed and looked away. "I was just protecting Spike. It wasn't half as awesome as when you hundred-combo'd Chrysalis' entire army, suplexed one of her bodyguards into the other one, and then crammed her head into her —"

Ember put a claw to his muzzle. His eyes crossed to track it.

"Ssssh! Stop talking," she said.

He did.

"Just … just accept the compliment, damn it!" The scales under Ember's gorgeous red eyes flushed. "B-baka."

Thorax's cheeks heated even further. "… Whoa," he breathed. "That just gave me chills."

"How does crystal even burn," Twilight whimpered in the background.

"Alright!" Future Starlight said, stepping forward. "Now that you've caught each other's eyes WITHOUT Spike being an idiot, I think we can all agree that we learned a valuable friendship lesson today — that there's nothing like a common enemy to —"

Her timer chimed.

"— unite very different people." She facehooved. "Ugh. Dammit. Note to self: Next time, don't be so surprised when Chrysalis is too stupid to live. Anyway!" She gave Embrax a grin. "Since the palace I burned down will take a week to rebuild, Ponyville's going to be too busy to deal with you two lovebirds. But there's three free pizzas and a keg of dragon-wine over at that remote, romantic lakeshore." She winked and threw her forehooves around their shoulders, leaning in. "Ignore the video cameras."

* * *

EPILOGUE:

"I have to admit," Ember said, "the way you handle friendship problems has gotten way more epic."

Twilight levitated another sheet of crystal onto the half-rebuilt castle's scaffolding and scowled.

"Anyway, Purplesparks, thanks for getting Thorax and I together." Ember grabbed one of the crystal sheets and bit into it, mumbling around her mouthful, "And for the pizza."

Twilight darkly mumbled something inaudible.

"Still," Ember said, "I just don't understand why you would burn down your own castle."

Twilight's eye twitched.

Starlight Fixes Babysitting
Episode 146: A Flurry of Emotions

A weary Cadence trudged her way through Ponyville, dutifully pushing a foal carriage before her and dragging a bedraggled Shining Armor behind her.

“Come on, Shiny. We’re almost to Twilight’s castle. Just a little further.” She called back to her husband.

He merely groaned face down in the dirt as he was scraped along. Flurry Heart burbled excitedly in her buggy.

“Once we get there, we can unload Flurry on Twilight, then we can have some time to ourselves to relax at your friend Sword Poke’s art show,” Cadence droned, as if repeating for the umpteenth time.

“Spearhead,” Shining moaned. “‘s name’s Spearhead.”

“I don’t care if his name is Chopped Liver. He’s an excuse to have a break,” she sighed.

There was a flash and suddenly a unicorn was standing in their path. “Let me stop you right there.”

“Whoozat?” Shining wondered. “Uh‘ll prutegtyoo, hunnibunny.”

“It’s just that mare, Starlight,” Cadence reassured him.

“Cn’t see frum dunherr,” he whined back.

“And how are the happy new parents doing today, eh?” chirped Starlight. “Thinking of ditching the rugrat with her aunt for the day without any notice?”

Cadence frowned. “Twilight loves spending time with Flurry.”

“Yeh.”

Starlight nodded. “Oh, I know. So much so that she’ll put all else aside to do it. She wants to be the ‘cool aunt’.” She set her jaw. “But your sister is a Princess now too. She has a myriad of responsibilities she has to attend to every day. As a government official, as a community leader, as a national hero, and as an educator.”

“Djyucator?” grumbled Shining.

“Wait, scratch that one. Not yet,” Starlight grimaced. “Point is, she’s busier than the pair of you seem to be, and she can’t just drop everything at a moment’s notice when you show up out of the blue.”

Cadence ruffled her wings in agitation. “Now listen here, Starlight. You can’t speak to me like that. I am a princess. I want to speak to y-”

“Oh get in line,” Starlight cut her off. She rolled her eyes. “Why you didn’t just have Sunburst foalsit Flurry is beyond me. He IS the filly’s godfather.”

Cadence cocked her head. “What father?”

“Wuz ‘god’?”

Starlight clamped down on the voices in her brain screaming ‘Deus vult!’. She shook her head. “Err, I mean her Crystaller. Never mind. You’re already here, so I’ve arranged for a foalsitter to take Flurry for the day.”

“Thnkyuuuuu…”

Cadence sighed. “Now we can go to Axe Wound’s show.”

“Sprrhead.”

Cadence’s eyes narrowed. “Wait. WHO is foalsitting?”

The was a pop and a burst of confetti and suddenly Pinkie Pie stood before them. “Surpriiiiiise!”

“Pinkie Pie?” Cadence asked in disbelief. “You want Pinkie Pie to take care of Flurry?”

“Hey, I did a pretty dingdangdarn good job the last time back at your place, didn’t I?” Pinkie grinned.

Starlight put a foreleg around the earth pony. “Don’t underestimate Pinkie. She’s a pro at this. She sits for the Cake twins all the time and they’re still alive!”

“Babies love me!” Pinkie cheered.

Cadence made a show of hemming and hawing. “Wellll… okay. I’ll allow it.”

Starlight rolled her eyes. “Oh, don’t act like you’re doing us a favor. You were dying to unload her. Just get going. Pinkie has this.” She smiled at her pink friend. “Besides. What’s the worst she could do? It’s not like she’d spray industrial chemicals on an infant.”

Shining snored into the dirt.

EPISODE 153 - A Royal Problem

Starlight Glimmer exploded into the royal dining room, earning the attention of all present, even the exhausted Luna. She was so done with family ‘friendship problems’ that plagued the Friendship Journal as of late. Family was a pain in the flank, always had been, always will be. If she was being honest though, getting a chance to fix the chaos that had been her first friendship mission was an appealing idea.

“No! No no, no, no. I've got this, I'm showing Twilight I can do this on my own and you aren't swooping in to mess everything up!” Starlight's past-self marched up to her, syrup still on her muzzle from the pancakes.

She rolled her eyes. “No, you're the one who messes everything up, you decide switching their cutie marks is a good idea! So shut it and let me handle things, besides, technically you are doing this on your own, I'm you, remember?”

The Royal Sisters stood together, watching the spectacle of Starlight arguing with herself.

“Sister what is happening?” Luna leaned closer to her sister, whispering. “Why is there two of Starlight Glimmer?”

Celestia sighed and leaned closer too, a deadpan expression on her face. “Starlight decided in the future to travel back and fix everything, and I do mean everything. I dare not stop her, I fear the consequences if future Starlight became stuck in the past.”

The diarchy of Equestria stood watching a moment longer, until it was interrupted by a blast of magic from future Starlight. “Sorry your highnesses, but this is the best I have.” She looked back at her past-self, stuck in a bubble, angrily hitting the barrier, her mouth moving but unheard.

Luna looked at her sister and found a form she hadn't seen since school millennia ago. “Oh sweet Faust no.” Next to her stood the Celestia she knew from high school, Daybreaker. If the look in Celestia's eye was anything to go by, Luna was just as bad.

Starlight interrupted their simultaneous horror. “Since you two wanna act like a couple whiny teenagers, you should look the part. Honestly, you've been alive how long and you still can't figure out how to talk to each other?!”

“Nononononono Starlight I demand you change us back!” Celestia tore the backwards ballcap off her fiery head and threw it away from herself in horror. “Daybreaker cannot come back, and neither can Nightmare Moon, we left those days behind!”

“Have you really?” The time traveler raised an eyebrow. “Luna the emo goth whatever and you the popular mean girl? You argue like a bunch of whiny teenagers, how did you manage to keep Equestria running this long?”

“I'm alternative, stop labeling me!” Luna blurted out in the Royal Canterlot Voice, her mane lashing angrily. She froze and covered her mouth. “Oh no, I'm already falling prey to her mind. Starlight Glimmer, you must change us back!”

Starlight tapped a hoof on the marble floor. “Mmm... No, not until you two quit acting like a bunch of teenagers and talk like the adults you should be.”

“You wouldn't let us regress.” Celestia narrowed her eyes.

“Try me.” Glimmer narrowed her eyes.

Luna wasn't about to take a chance. “Yes! We will talk like adults, just release us from this angst!”

In a flash, Luna had returned to normal with a sigh of relief. “Dear Faust... That was horrible.”

Celestia meanwhile was fighting the urge to do a keg stand. “Gah! Fine! Luna and I have been avoiding talking, I admit!” She felt the heat around her dissipate, and she found herself no longer in the fiery form of Daybreaker.

Starlight blew air over her red hot horn with a rather unnerving grin. “Good, now play nice, I'll be the mediator, bye!” She disappeared, and her past-self approached the Princesses with a timid smile.

“Sorry about that your highne-” Her apology was cut off, an open pizza box falling in front of her. A pineapple pizza sat inside, her favorite. "Ooo!" She happily took a bite from a slice she lifted in her magical grasp, not noticing the Princesses at first.

Both Celestia and Luna stared at the offensively topped pizza, then up to Starlight, who froze mid-chew.

“What?”

179. Starlight Fixes The Break-Up Break Down

"It's time for your intervention," Twilight Sparkle gloated. "I finally have proof you have a problem."

Starlight nodded absently from where she was sprawled on her custom crystal throne by the Cutie Map table. She flipped a page in Kites Quarterly, and sucked some pineapple smoothie through a straw.

Twilight held up a dog-eared friendship journal in her hornglow. "Remember this? All those friendship lessons we all learned the hard way, which you thought you could speed-run through with time travel?" She shook the journal at Starlight accusingly. "Well, now there's one you can't solve, because you messed with the timeline too much!"

"Mmm," Starlight grunted, flipping another page.

"It's Hearts and Hooves Day today! And look! Big Mac was supposed to send Sugar Belle a pie, which would get misdelivered to Sweetie Belle, and then he would overhear Sugar talking about ending a relationship, and Discord would convince him to preemptively break up with her before everyone finally sorted out their misunderstandings and they got back together!" Twilight said. "But he can't do any of that, because you caused Sugar Belle to fall in love with Double Diamond so you could catch Mac on the rebound!"

"Okay," Starlight said. She turned her magazine sideways and flipped out the centerfold, nodding appreciatively. "And?"

Twilight's eye twitched. "And!?" she shouted. "How will Big Mac learn the valuable lesson that when your friends do something which seems hurtful, you have to talk it out with them before making assumptions?"

The crystal door behind them squeaked open. "Hey, Twi?" Applejack said. "Have you seen Star– oh." She cleared her throat. "Mac said to tell ya he's takin' Future You's advice, and takin' you out to dinner tonight to talk 'bout why the pie he baked ya was in yer trash can."

Starlight nodded and flipped another page. "Let him know I'd like to propose a counteroffer," she said without looking up. "His room. 7 pm. Romantic candles. He brings a new pie to replace the one that Chrysalis poisoned. I bring the pizza."

"Fine, I'll —" Applejack paused, then sighed. "Sufferin' hootenannies. The bug's back in town?"

Starlight waved a dismissive hoof. "I've got it." She glanced over at Twilight. "Was that all?"

Twilight opened and closed her mouth ineffectually, then shook her head and jabbed a hoof angrily at the friendship journal. "That doesn't fix all the friendship problems! Plural, with an S! For example, Sugar Belle was supposed to move to town and apprentice with the Cakes. How are they going to get enough free time to take care of their foals now?"

"'Scuse me, Purplesparks," a draconic voice said from right over Twilight's shoulder. "You wanted to see me?"

Twilight jumped. "Dragon Lord Ember?!"

Starlight raised her hoof. "I did, actually," she said. "Would you do me a favor real quick?"

Ember grinned, revealing rows of fangs. "I'm just gonna assume you're the one who set me up with Thorax last time I was here, and say, 'Tartarus, yes'."

Starlight grinned back. "You also remember Chrysalis, right?"

"Yeah, the invading changeling queen whose splines I reticulated that day. Why?"

"Well, this morning, I made her a very generous offer. Namely, I would overlook the fact that she's snuck into Ponyville for revenge again — for as long as she disguised herself as a baker, apprenticed herself to the Cakes, and didn't do anything to hurt anypony. But she seems to have declined." Starlight's smile grew menacing. "So I'd appreciate it if you could walk over to the ugly vase in the corner, bend it into a mathematically impossible shape, and then find out how many housecats you can cram into its —"

With a green flash, the vase turned into the changeling queen. "I've reconsidered," Chrysalis blurted out, voice raised by an octave. "If I apologize for the pie, can I still accept your terms?"

"Sure." Starlight turned back to Twilight, and asked pleasantly, "Anything else?"

"B-b-b-" Twilight sputtered as Chrysalis waved at her and walked out. Her eye twitched even harder. She shook her head tightly, whirled back to Starlight, and shouted, "Discord! He and Spike had that whole side bet going on! But now he's never going to learn how important love is!"

"Oh! Hey!" Cadance said brightly from the doorway. "There you are! I've been looking all over the Crystal Palace for you!"

Twilight blinked several times. Then sighed, and her posture wilted. "Okay, I give up," she said in a small voice. "Intervention over. Starlight, you win. I'll … just get out of you two's way now."

Cadance blinked, then giggled at Twilight. "I wasn't looking for Starlight, silly! I was looking for you!"

"… Huh?"

Cadance's smile slowly grew. "I already shot Discord with a love beam, just like Future Starlight asked. But then he got all pouty, and said it was unfair he was the only one getting zotted, when it was Hearts and Hooves Day and there was an attractive alicorn in town who'd never even been on a date~"

Twilight froze.

She slowly turned around.

Discord, hiding his face half-behind a bouquet-hive of rosebees, giggled and waved. His cheeks reddened underneath eyes filled with heart-shaped pupils.

Cadance's horn flashed. Twilight's eyes also popped into little hearts.

As the three of them teleported off, Starlight sucked down the last of her smoothie, her straw making that bottom-of-the-glass noise. She set the empty down, and raised her voice. "So, girls, was anypony else planning an intervention tonight?"

The Cutie Mark Crusaders slowly raised their heads from behind the nearby map table.

"N-nah," Sweetie Belle said. "We're good."

S8E8: The Parent Map

"I know, I'm a horrible daughter." Starlight proceeded to flop onto the train seat.
"No, no- my mom actually does kinda the same thing."
A muffled thud emanates from one of Sunburst's books, along with a small burst of teal light.
Starlight sits up. "Did something just teleport into..." Tilting her head, she reads the spine. "Quartz Quill's Treatise on Advanced Enchantment?"
Sunburst shrugs and opens the book, letting out a whinny at the parcel that burrowed its way through all the pages of his signed copy. Starlight, meanwhile, opens the package.
"Dragonlighter, letter, Peach Ribbon's Guide to Empty Nest Syndrome and Accepting Your Foal's Independence, another copy of the same, and - oooh, this one's addressed to you and me."

Starlight, Sunburst

I'm on a schedule here so I have to be brief.
Give these books to your parents.
Be nice to them, they are your parents.
Send this letter to Celestia, she's looking for a place to build a government facility/theme park. Don't ask.
Don't worry about the Treatise, you would have left it there anyway.
Yours, Starlight.

P.S. Ask Trixie about what she keeps in the secret compartment under the wagon. It's certainly something.

After sighing with relief, Sunburst packs their new weapons of map destruction back into his book-shaped box, Starlight burns the letter, satisfied in bringing the town some new income so they can actually grow to a population that needs committees, and a pair of binoculars retreat into a suspiciously speedy cloud, which then vanishes in a burst of teal, leaving behind a flyer for something called "Seventh Sanctum."

Sorry for late upload, but better late than never.

Rainbow Dash sighed as she walked through the Las Pegasus, un able to fulfil her dream of riding ‘The Wild Blue Yonder™’ (although not hearing about it prior to Soarin telling her), and was totally not about to join Granny Smith doing some weird Applejack friendly stuff, and would much rather just stand around and keep the cider out of their reach (her belly, of course).

Suddenly, Starlight walked out of nowhere and muttered: “This is going to be difficult.”

Her horn lit up and she dragged them all over to the The Queue™ for The Wild Blue Yonder™ and stood behind The Queue™s Railings™. (okay this is getting old) She pushed everypony waiting in the line and pushed them out of the way as they walked swiftly through. She placed everyone on the rollercoaster and walked up to the pony controlling its speed and when it would go.

“Get this baby running, okay?” She asked the worker.

“Sorry mam, can’t do that. It’s against the law without waiting in the line.”

“YOU DARE DISOBEY ME?!? YOU PEASANT. GET IT RUNNING OR SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN! AM I CLEAR!? OR YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME IS THE LAW WHEN I LAY MY HOOVES ON YOU IF YOU DO NOT GET THIS THING GOING!!!”

“AAAAAAAAHHHHHH OKAY!!??!” The worker threw the levers forward and ran off. He accidentally forgot that he put it on turbo. The rollercoaster flew off the tracks and started its own adventure through the air.

And at that moment, everyone in Shawshank The Rollercoaster felt free.

Until gravity kicked in and they plummeted to the ground.

Sorry for the VERY late upload. I was out of town the last several days for my grandmother's funeral and just got home today. With this and with my brother's wedding when you handed out assignments for season 7, you just keep picking all the worst weeks for my family obligations. So really it's YOUR fault. Anyway:

Starlight Fixes the Competition
Episode 178: Non-Compete Clause

It was Wednesday at the School of Friendship. That meant it was time for another faculty meeting. This particular Wednesday’s main topic of discussion was a field trip the students (or rather, the six students that actually mattered) were going to undertake. The trip was meant to teach teamwork, which caught the attention of two particular teachers (the two teachers who really had no business being teachers in the first place).

Applejack raised a hoof. “I'm your pony, Twilight! Sweet Apple Acres has taught me a thing or two about workin' together.” Why she wasn’t tending said farm right now was never asked.

“Yeah, but being a Wonderbolt's the definition of teamwork,” countered Rainbow Dash, equally absent from her real job.

Applejack chuckled, only slightly insincerely. “I'm sure you're not sayin' fancy flyin' makes ya a better choice than me.”

Rainbow chuckled, very insincerely. “I wouldn't say ‘better’. Just a little more qualified. No offense.”

“Maybe you can lead the field trip together,” Fluttershy offered, breaking the tension.

“Of course!” Twilight declared. “Who better to model the importance of working as a team?”

“HI!” Starlight announced as the door flew open and she swept into the room.

All eyes turned to her. “Starlight?” Twilight questioned. “I thought you had a doctor’s appointment today.”

“Oh, I do,” she confirmed. She leaned close to Twilight. “By the by, the test is going to come back negative.”

Twilight looked visibly relieved, then seemed to catch herself and blushed.

Starlight smiled and looked around the room at her friends, finally focusing in on Applejack and Rainbow. “Anyhoo, don’t mind me. I’m just going to borrow these two for a jiffy.”

Without further ado, she lit her horn, there was a flash of light, and the three were gone. The room was silent for a beat.

“Ohhhhhhhh! It was THAT Starlight!” Pinkie droned.

~~~~~Seven Seasons Earlier~~~~~

There was a flash behind a conveniently concealing tree and suddenly the trio appeared at Sweet Apple Acres.

“What the… where are we?” Rainbow asked, looking around.

“We’re back in Fall Weather Friends, just before, well, watch,” Starlight answered, pointing a pair of ponies off to the side. It was another set of Applejack and Rainbow Dash, deep in heated conversation.

“Tomorrow is the annual Runnin' of the Leaves. I challenge you to race me in it," drawled Past Applejack.

Past Rainbow smirked. “Heh! Easy shmeasy.”

“Ohhh. Yer THAT Starl-” Applejack started, turning to her companions before realizing she could see right through them. “Ahhh! Yer transpirit!”

“That’s ‘transparent’,” corrected Starlight, “Though you’re actually closer than you think. I cast a ghosting spell on the three of us. We can’t be seen, heard, or felt. You two are going to observe some of your past interactions and see if you can glean a lesson or two from them. Copacetic? Kay, I’ll be back to pick you up tomorrow afternoon. Byeee!”

There was another flash and she was gone, leaving two very confused and irritated friends.

~~~~~Three Seasons Later~~~~~

There was yet another flash and Starlight appeared in the dark husk of the ruined Castle of the Two Sisters. In one corner of the great hall, there was a tent pitched which emitted seven sets of quiet breathing. To the other side two ghostly ponies leaned against a wall, looking very irate.

“Hello again, you two! So have we learned anything this time?” Starlight asked archly. “If not, I have some individual lessons in taking it down a notch for you to revisit. ‘Fact or Fan Fiction’, Wonderbolts Academy’, ‘Somepony to Watch Over Me’, ‘Pinkie Apple Pie’. I could go on.”

“An’ what lesson were we s’posed to learn?” growled Applejack.

“Yeah!” Dash agreed. “That when something even kinda interesting is about to happen you swoop in and fix stuff before it starts?”

Starlight looked back and forth between the two in confusion. “What? I’ve already fixed these two? But I haven’t been to these yet. This is one of my first… Ohhhhh. Right, that’s not how temporal continuity works. Okay, um… how about this?

She slapped the pair upside the backs of their heads. “Ow!” they both cried.

“Ah thought you said nopony could touch-”

“Don’t! Be! So! Competitive!” Starlight barked. “Every time you get stubborn and try to one-up somepony, especially each other, it just ruins everything!”

“A g-g-g-ghooOOooost!” a pink voice shrieked from the corner of the room.

All three turned to see Pinkie peeking out of the tent, staring directly at them.

“Ah thought you said nopony could see-”

Starlight snorted sharply. “It’s Pinkie. Forget it. Let’s go home.”

With a big bang and a final flash, they were gone, leaving just a shocked Pinkie. “Gasp. I see dead ponies.”

6691031
6649722
Please note that I updated this ever so slightly to fix a couple errors and make it flow better in a spot. So please make sure to use the updated version. Thhhhiiaaaaaaanksssss!

6691574 Done.

6693909
Same; I updated 6686160 to clean up the flow and wording of some of the middle bits.

Starlight Fixes “Molt Down”

Changes in their bodies: everypony has them, right?

But Spike used to think it only happened to ponies. He was a dragon, he wasn’t going to grow like that...

Now, Spiked wished it only happened with ponies.

Voice changes, indigestion, those terrible scales stones that itched like hell... Smolder had told him he was growing, and that he was going to move out since no one wanted a molting dragon around.

But that couldn’t be true, could it? Sure, Twilight wasn’t very happy with his burning breath, and the tourist group complained about his voice, but that didn’t mean they didn’t want him, right?

Right?

The more he thought about it, the more nervous he became, and the more his scales itched. He didn’t want to go live in a cave...he wanted to stay with Twilight, reorganising books and making lists. He wanted to stay with Rarity, helping her find gems for her wonderful dresses. He wanted to stay in Ponyville, where everypony knew him and liked him. He couldn’t just go.

And...he was going to grow, in size. He was terrified at the thought of becoming a monster who would terrorise the town and steal treasures for himself. Smolder had told him molting was different from growing out of greed, but ¿What if it wasn’t? ¿What if he hurt someone? ¿What if he...?

And there she was again, at the entrance of the Everfree Forest. She always was somewhere near everytime someone had a problem...

Starlight Glimmer

“Hello, Starlight”

“Hello, Spike”, answered her, “Molting, I presume”

“Yeah, it’s awful”

“So...What’s exactly bothering you? The scales? The voice? The smell?”

“What smell?”

“Oh, you'll see”

Spike replied, in an almost unintelligible voice, “I’m nervous about leaving”

“Sorry, what was that?”

“I said I’m nervous about leaving”

“Could you speak a little louder? Just a bit-“

“I’M NERVOUS ABOUT LEAVING”

“...Yes, I heard”

Starlight had to leave home at some point too, and she was about to leave the castle once. Maybe she understood Spike more than she imagined.

“I know it hurts to grow up, but it’s not something you can help. You just have to accept it. Sooner or later you got to leave the nest”

“But,” Spike said, “Do I have to leave now?”

“Would you like to find out?”

Spike nodded, and watched as Starlight performed her time-travel spell in both of them

“Wait, didn’t you say we were going to see if I leave home in the future? Why are we still in the Everfree Forest?”

“Oh, I just have something to do first”

And as soon as Starlight finished her sentence, a giant bird passed by them, only to be shoot down by a magic laser beam.

“That’s all”, Starlight said, “Now, let’s continue”

“... And whatever happens, we'll get through it together”

Twilight was hugging Spike, who now had grown wings

“Is...is that me?” Spike said, seing his future self as he and his friends started walking back to Ponyville.

“Yes, do you like it?”

“It’s...it’s amazing”

“I told you Spike. Growing may hurt, but it brings along great things”

“Did it happen to you?”

“...maybe...”

Spike went back to his present, now more confident about his molt, knowing that soon he would change for the better.

“That’s all” said Starlight to herself, “and I just have a small delay”

“Delay?...Wait! Starlight!”, Spike shouted

“Yes?”

“I appreciate what you’ve done, really. But couldn’t you just cast a spell on me so I could grow faster?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”, Starlight said, nervously

“Come on Starlight, You’ve turned yourself into a filly, sure you could’ve turn me into a grown-up dragon. It could’ve saved you a lot of time”

“And let you skip one of the most awful and embarassing moments in your life? Where’s the fun in that?”

The end :p
So...my computer broke down just after finals and...OH MY GOD WRITING AND EDITING IN A MOBILE IS HARD
But somehow I managed to do it

Salutations, everyone. Here's my first contribution. Bit rushed and unpolished but time is short.

“Wonderful news, everypony!”

Twilight was happy, it was simple as that. She proudly watched as her friends worked hard on their stage preparing for the play in honor of her mentor Princess Celestia. Her dear friends gathered around her to hear if their play is set to go. Now, some would wonder why did they start preparations if they weren’t sure that there will even be play, but those ponies have no place in Ponyville.

Applejack was first to respond,“Yeehaw! We get to put on our show?”

Bursting with happiness, Twilight was more than glad to share the good news. “Even better. Princess Celestia is gonna be our star!”

The response was not what Twilight imagined when she meticulously planned to share her news. Instead of cheers of joys everyone on the stage just gained worried looks on their faces. Nervously they looked at each other, hoping that one of them would be brave enough to say what they all were thinking..

Again, Applejack was first to speak. “Ya sure it’s a good thing, Twi? That sounds like just askin’ for Starlight to come.

Starlight, who stood next to Applejack, looked at her and slowly said.“But, I already am here.”

“I meant the other you. Ya know,” Applejack looked carefully left and right before whispering, “Future Starlight.”

“Yeah, that’s how I felt too,” grumbled Spike to himself.

Before Twilight could say anything it was Rarity’s turn to mildly worry. “This is a disaster! I must remake everything! And then remake everything again just in case Starlight does anything horrible.”

Fluttershy on the other hand had a contrarian opinion. “I kinda like Future Starlight solving all our problems. I can’t remember last time I had a problem I had to deal with.”

“Well I don’t like it,” Dash complained. “She is always there ruining my moments to shine! I can’t even prove that I am more daring pony than Applejack!”

“Can’t prove what ain’t true, suggarcube.”

It was around this moment that Twilight had enough. “Girls! Everything will be fine. Celestia will play her part and there will be nothing for Future Starlight to solve. I mean, what could possibly go wrong? “

“What are we gonna do?! If I tell Celestia she's terrible, it'll hurt her feelings, and I'll be a bad friend. But if I keep her in the show, she'll be the laughingstock of Equestria, and I'll be a worse friend.”

To say that Celestia’s acting was not very good would be an understatement. In fact, saying that Celestia’s performance was bad would probably be an insult to the very word bad. This and thousand other thoughts were jumping around Twilight’s head as she zipped back and forth on the backstage.   

Applejack grabbed panicking Twilight, “Ya need to tell Celestia the truth, Twilight. Do it before Future Starlight comes and does who knows what!”

“No, we can fix this!” Twilight summoned quill and parchment and then started writing. “I just need to get professional actors to help, or maybe we can attach strings on Celestia and puppeteer her while Pinkie uses her ventriloquist skills to-”

But before Twilight was able to reveal finer details of her master plan, Spike casually tugged her mane and pointed at the stage.“Too late, Starlight is already talking to Celestia.”

Time froze for Twilight. She helplessly starred as her own student was about to undermine everything she worked for. Her friendship with her mentor gone in a blink of an eye. But then a tiny voice was heard. Telling Twilight that it’s not too late to stop it. As she finished her blink she disappeared in a purple flash of light.

As Starlight was speaking she was blinded by a sudden flash of light. Before she knew what was going on she was pinned on ground by Twilight.

“She is only kidding! She was just kidding about you being a horrible actor, it’s a theater tradition!” said Twilight completely with nervous smile and a slight eye twitch.

Celestia just stood shocked and whispered to herself, “I’m a horrible actor?”

Figures started falling in place and Twilight realized they were not fitting. Seeing the surprise on her mentors face she uncertainty turned her attention at the pinned Starlight.  

“Twilight, I’m not the Future Starlight,” said Starlight.

“Wait, you are not? So that means that I just...”

“Revealed to Princess Celestia  that she is a horrible actor in most dramatic way possible? Pretty much.”

Twilight sighed, “Well at least that was one way to settle this. And we didn’t need Future Starlight to deal with anything for once.”

“Um, Twilight,” Starlight pointed behind her.

Twilight turned her head and watched in shock as Future Starlight was channeling a spell directly into Celestia’s head. Twilight’s pupils shrank and she mouthed a quiet no.

“And another friendship problem solved. Next stop, Sire’s Hollow” Future Starlight concluded and disappeared in a flash back to the future.

For a moment both Twilight and Starlight stood motionless, watching the spot where Future Starlight was just moment ago. Then both of them rushed towards unconscious princess.  

“Princess Celestia?” Twilight hesitantly asked, “Are you alright?”

CELESTIA: To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,

Starlight smiled at Twilight, or at least she attempted, She placed her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder and tried to comfort her. “Well problem solved, she can act now.”

CELESTIA: And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep
No more; and by a sleep, to say we end
The heart-ache, and the thousand natural shocks

Starlight tried to force her smile even more while Twilight just blankly stared at her mentor. Celestia continued her performance completely ignoring the two, which challenged the forced smiled capacity of Starlight.

“I think that all she can do is act now.” Twilight calmly nodded and added, “I can work with that. And after the play you’ll reverse the spell.”

“Me? Why me? I don’t even know which spell it is.”

And with that Twilight’s calmness ended. She turned towards Starlight, pointing her hoof and yelling, “Because you cast it! Or you will cast it because the Future you cast it in your past. I mean in our present. I mean uh.”

And it was at that point where Twilight simply reached her limit and collapsed on the ground. Spike knowing Twilight well was already there to grab her and take her away.

He turned and said, “Take five, everypony.”

The door snikt closed behind her, leaving Fluttershy to face the empty interior of Rarity 4 You alone.

But she would not be defeated. She would not be cowed! She would not be rendered something less offensive to cows. She had made a promise to her friend, and she would use every ounce of her admittedly paltry strength to see that promise through, because she was a good friend. She was a winner! She was on fire! She! Was! Flutter--

"Eep!"

Fluttershy materialized under a rack of stallions' shirts the moment the bell on the door tinkled. Her raccoon friends chittered and face-pawed in disgust.

"I mean..." Clearing her throat, Fluttershy extricated herself from the shirts and stood up mostly tall and somewhat proud. "W-welcome to Rarity Number Four You?"

She stopped with a question mark because the pony who had just entered was not one she had expected, in more ways than one.

Okay, maybe some tiny part of her wasn't surprised to see Starlight Glimmer. Every time Fluttershy's life got even the tiniest bit potentially aggrieving, Starlight was sure to show up. But she didn't usually have this much grey in her mane. Or look so haggard. Or thin. Not that Starlight was fat.

Not that Fluttershy would ever say Starlight was fat.

"Starlight?" was all she could think to ask.

Starlight glanced around the shop, looked Fluttershy over, and gave a relieved sigh. "Hi, Fluttershy," she said, voice tired. "It's good to see you again."

Fluttershy licked her lips. "Um, is it safe to assume you're future Starlight?" She got a nod in response. "A-and that you're not here to buy a dress?" A shake of the head.

"I'm here to help," said Starlight, though there wasn't much enthusiasm to her words.

"Oh!" For a moment, Fluttershy's most contrarian nature took control of her mouth. "But I promised Rarity I would look after the shop for her! I mean, me, only me! I have to do it! R-right?"

Starlight shook her head sadly. "Fluttershy, don't you remember what AJ learned about letting other ponies help?"

Fluttershy looked at her blankly.

"Right, of course you wouldn't." Starlight sighed. "It's in the Journal." She rubbed her temple. "I've been doing this so long, I can't remember what's when."

Stepping forward, Starlight placed a hoof gently on Fluttershy's shoulder. The smile she gave was the kindest and most supportive Fluttershy had ever seen from her friend. Not that Starlight wasn't kind or supportive.

Not that Fluttershy would ever say Starlight wasn't kind or supportive.

"Fluttershy, do you want to sell some goddamn clothes?"

Fluttershy wasn't sure what one of those words meant, but she nodded nonetheless. "Yes! I do!"

Starlight smiled, and the door bell tinkled.

It wasn't the most profitable day in the history of Rarity 4 You, before or since. But neither was it a drama bomb. They sold some clothes. They didn't scare off any customers. They had a laugh or two. And, by the time Starlight said goodbye and took the magic carpet ride to another time, they had maybe even learned something.

Because that's what's really important.

Pinkie Pie was so mad, she could just about have sweared a cuss.

She'd just gotten done dealing with the most annoying, boring, aggravating, irritating, dumb, stupid, dull, stupid, stupid, awful pony in all of Equestria, only to find out the cake shop had closed for lunch! She was gonna make a super-special-duper-awesome cake for a super-special-duper-awesome pony, but nope! Not anymore! That pony was just going to have to go cakeless for ever and ever because some ponies couldn't decide between saying "goodbye" and saying "see you later"! Speaking with precision, her adorable pink bee-hind! It was enough to make a pony want to punt something into next Thursday.

Thankfully, she bumped into her big sister like, right afterward, so everything became much better.

"Hello, Pinkie Pie," said Maud, in her usual affectionate deadpan.

"Maud!" Pinkie cheered, hugging her. "Found you! My turn to hide, hee hee!"

"I'm sorry I wasn't around this morning."

"Oh, pssh." Pinkie waved her hoof. "What are you apologizing to me for? I'm not upset, you silly-willy."

"The reason is I met somepony--"

"Wanna hang out right now?" Pinkie wrapped an arm around her sister's neck. "I mean, I can see you're not doing anything with anypony else. Unless they're invisible or reeeeeaaaally small." She stuck her hooves really close together, watching Maud through the gap.

"Pinkie, the reason I've been so busy is that I have a special somepony now."

Every gear in Pinkie Pie's head came to a screeching halt. All she could say was, "A wha?"

"A significant other."

"A whaaa?"

"A shmoopy-doo."

"A whaaaaa?"

"A marefriend."

Pinkie sprang into the air. "That's so exciting! My sister, in love! Tell me, tell me, tell me, is she anypony I know?"

"No."

This didn't surprise Pinkie, all things considered. There were, after all, plenty of ponies in Equestria. Plenty of fish in the sea. Plenty of pancakes in the--

"She's two ponies you know."

"Whaaaaaaa?"

Maud blinked, looking behind herself. "There's one of them now."

Of all the ponies in all the gin joints in all of Equestria, who should walk up to Maud Pie and give her a familiar hug but the Great and Power Trixie. Pinkie was agog. Agog, I tells ya!

"Hi, Pinkie Pie. Hiiii, Maudie!"

Maud's smile grew infinitesimally wider. "Hi, Lulu."

"Trixie does love it when you call her that." Trixie giggled. "Are you ready for our big date at the Hoofington fair? Starlight's waiting for us."

The ambient temperature decreased slightly as Pinkie sucked in all the air. "You're dating Trixie and Starlight?"

Maud nodded. "I'm really glad Starlight hooked us up with her younger, hotter self."

"More like she hooked Trixie and Starlight up with you." Trixie tittered, and Pinkie thought she smelled an awful lot like flowers? "Either way, bonus! Come on, let's go. Those fried foods on sticks aren't going to eat themselves!"

"Something tells me those aren't the only things we'll be eating today," Maud said. Trixie blushed a deep red and slapped her on the flank, eliciting exactly zero reaction as they moved off.

"You are terrible! Trixie loves it."

"Wait!" shouted Pinkie, zipping ahead of them. "This is great! My big sister is dating my kind-of friend and a kind-of friend of a kind-of friend! And you two are dating each other! I need to throw a party about this!"

Trixie sucked in a breath between her teeth. "Trixie appreciates the enthusiasm, but maybe you should hold off on any party-throwing on our behalf? Starlight's a little, you know..." She waved her hoof in the air.

"Shy?" Maud suggested.

"Gassy?" Pinkie added.

Trixie rolled her eyes. "Closeted. Despite making numerous major relationship decisions at the behest of her older, wiser self."

Maud nodded. "I know what that's like. Up until now, I'd had deep questions regarding my sexuality. I kept finding myself going out with really boring stallions." She gave a little uptilt of the corners of her mouth. "It's good to finally know who I actually am."

"The point is," Trixie continued, "we're keeping things on the dee-aich-ell, as they say. Starlight's not ready to tell everypony yet. But I'll make sure she tells you when it's a good time for a party, promise."

She grinned at Maud and threw a hoof around her withers. "Now, come on, let's go!"

They went.

Boy, did Pinkie have a lot to think about. Maud, dating! Ponies dating more than one pony at once! Mares dating mares! Starlight dating Trixie and also Maud too!

Some small, terrible part of her pointed out that it was a good thing Maud had figured out who she actually was, as she'd put it. After all, she could have ended up dating a pony like that weirdo she met earlier that day!

She spun around to see said weirdo staring at her.

"Hello," he said, in his dumb, stupid, boring way. It was like he was all of Maud's worst traits, balled up into one horrible, pony-shaped package.

"What?" said Pinkie.

"You were talking aloud, despite nopony being around," he explained unhelpfully.

Pinkie's face contorted in rage. "You ruined my morning cake-shopping!"

The colt held up his stupid hoof. "Technically, you delayed the store clerk yourself by attempting to rush my conversation."

Pinkie's face turned bright red as her cheeks puffed out and steam poured from her ears. "Fuck you, dickbag!"

The colt closed his stupid eyes. "Technically, the bag is underneath--"

"SHUT UP!"

With his eyes closed, he thankfully couldn't react as she punted him into next Thursday. A cry of "Technicallyyyyyyyy--" fading behind him as he made a twinkle on the horizon.

Pinkie Pie felt much better.

She bounced all the way back to Ponyville, making plans for a "Congratulations on Dating Two Ponies" party, sometime in the hopefully near future.

A few days before the Cutie Map decided something needed to be done...

Terramar sat on a rock at the ocean's edge. When the tide washed up on his back legs, dangling over the water, they would magically become a long, sinuous tailfin. Then, after a little bit, the water would dry and the fin would turn back into hooves.

Terramar scowled at his tailfin as though it had done him wrong. He picked up a rock in his front fin and heaved out as far as he could.

The sound of rocks scattering and a rasping cough told Terramar he wasn't alone. He turned his head to see an old unicorn standing on the rocky beach a few lengths behind him.

"Hello." Her coat was light pink, her mane silvery, with a single bright streak of teal. She wasn't, he realized, quite as old as he'd initially though, but he was still surprised to see her.

"Would you mind coming in off the rocks so we can talk, dear? I'm afraid they're are a tad intimidating."

Blinking, he waited until his tail had split into legs again and did as bidden. He might have no idea who this pony might be, but he wasn't about to disobey an elder. His parents had taught him...

He wasn't going to think about that. He joined the pony on the beach, looking up at her curiously.

"What's a unicorn doing out here on Mount Aris?" he asked. "Uh, if you don't mind me asking."

She smiled warmly. "A little birdie told me a certain hippogriff was having a problem. I thought I'd see what I could do to help." She beckoned, and they moved off the beach, up the cliffs of Mount Aris.

"Problems? I don't have any problems..." He rubbed a claw across the back of his head, blushing as she regarded him with a raised eyebrow.

"Glaring at your own appendages like you're thinking of cutting them off isn't the kind of thing a creature with no problems is likely to do." She smiled softly. "My name's Starlight. Why don't you tell me what's bothering you, Terramar?"

Part of him wanted to ask her how she knew his name. There was something just slightly off about this pony, though not in a bad way. He couldn't put his finger on it.

"It's my parents." He frowned, and it deepened with each word he spoke. "My dad's setting up the 'Glad to Be a Hippogriff' Festival." His voice was mocking. "Queen Novo wants to celebrate the hippogriffs returning to Mount Aris, but he's being all... stupid about it!

"And my mom still lives in Seaquestria. She's helping with relocating and trying to... I dunno, keep our history alive or something?" He scowled at the ground. "And every time I try to help them, they start talking about how great Mount Aris or Seaquestria is, and how much they want me to spend more time there, and..."

They had climbed rather high at this point. The ocean below was choppy under the grey skies. He picked up a pebble and tossed it over the edge, counting the seconds before it splashed into the water.

"Every time I think about it, I can't choose. I don't want to live in just Mount Aris or just Seaquestria!" He sighed. "If I pick one, I'm going to let the other one down. There's no way to fix this without disappointing one of my parents. It's not fair."

The mare said nothing, putting an arm gently around him. When she finally spoke, she was quiet.

"That's not all that's wrong, is it?"

Something heavy rose in Terramar's throat. "They're not talking to each other," he said, heat stinging the corners of his eyes.

Beside him, Starlight gave a small sigh. "My parents had similar problems when I was your age. It didn't help that I was already a troubled foal. I went on to make some really bad decisions because I felt like my family's happiness was riding on my shoulders."

Terramar hiccuped, and Starlight turned him toward her. She crouched down, looking into his eyes.

"It's not your fault, Terramar."

The words hung around him like a wreath of smoke, obscuring everything else.

"It's not your job to fix your family's problems. Don't let your parents put you between them. If the worst happens, just remind your mom and your dad that you love them both, no matter where they live."

Terramar scrubbed at his cheek. "But where should I live?"

Starlight smiled. "What were you doing when I found you just now? Changing back and forth between seapony and hippogriff, right?"

"Yeah." He looked away from her. "I can't figure out which I'd rather be."

"Terramar, you're missing the big picture. You were changing." She smiled at him, her shining eyes warm. "You don't have to choose to live in one place or another, because you have the beautiful ability to change back and forth. You can be a seapony if you want one day, and a hippogriff the next. Where you want to be is up to you!"

And suddenly, it was like Terramar never had a problem to begin with. He wiped his eyes and gave the mare a smile. "How come I didn't figure that out before?"

Smiling softly, Starlight said, "Sometimes, you need somepony else to see your problems for you."

Hesitating only a second, Terramar rushed forward and hugged Starlight, who patted his head. "Thank you," he whispered.

"If you'd really like to thank me, how about a swim?" Starlight chuckled and tapped the pearl in his necklace. "I hear sea water is good for achy joints. And I was always a little jealous of Princess Twilight getting to be a seapony."

He blinked at her. "You know Princess Twilight?" he asked, reverently.

Laughing, Starlight led him back down the steps. "Come on. Once we're in the water, I'll tell you some stories about her younger days."

170 & 171. School Daze

"I think a school of friendship is a wonderful idea Twilight," Princess Celestia said. "I'll help in any way I can. You were my star pupil. If anypony knows how to run a school, it's you."

"There's a big difference between attending a school and running one. It's not like there's a rule book to follow," Twilight said.

"Actually there is. The EEA guidebook is very specific about how to run a school."

With a flash of purple light, Future Starlight appeared.

"Yeah but a school doesn't need to be EEA accredited, does it?" Starlight asked rhetorically, already knowing the answer.

"Like in the 'Capital N', hunter/gather sense of the word, need? No," Celestia answered.

"Then don't," Starlight said.

"But I want my school to be EEA accredited!" Twilight said.

"Shhh," Starlight shushed her, gently caressing her cheek. "No. You really don't. How would you like some pony popping in every week telling you what to do?" she asked, before vanishing again with a flash.

"I already hate it," Twilight grumbled.

181. Marks for Effort

Future Starlight Glimmer saw Twilight Sparkle speaking with the Cutie Mark Crusaders in the Friendship School hallway. "Hi Twilight, looks like you could use a guidance councilor's help!" she said. "Hint hint?"

"No thanks Starlight. I got this," Twilight said, dismissing her.

"I said, HINT HINT," Starlight repeated.

"Oh geez, it's you, again," Twilight said, recognizing that it was that Starlight. "I was just about to tell them that they can't be my students because they don't need friendship lessons."

"That's true, but why not take them on as tutors?" Starlight suggested.

"I don't have anything to spare in the school budget for that," Twilight said. Starlight chuckled.

Oh please! Hasn't Spike taught you anything about the value of unpaid internships?"

182. The Mean 6

Shutterbug zipped about the room, pulling the hair of each pony and taking their pictures except Starlight. Then she left. Future Starlight appeared in the hallway behind her.

"Hey, I was too nervous to mention it before, but I couldn't help but notice that you pulled everypony's hair except the one who likes it pulled," Starlight said with a devious grin. "You big tease." Starlight flipped her tail at her.

"Oh." Shutterbug just stared at her for a moment, processing the words. "Okay then." She pulled a hair from Starlight's tail.

"Mmf, yes!" Starlight shuddered.

"Well this got weird in a hurry," Shutterbug said, making haste out the front door. Starlight teleported above her and tackled her to the ground.

"My turn," Starlight whispered, pulling a hair from Shutterbug's tail. In a flash of green flame, the hair transformed back into a piece of black chitin. "Oh?" Starlight struck Shutterbug with her changeling nullification spell, revealing Queen Chrysalis's true form. "Oh." Starlight frowned. "I guess we're both looking for love in all the wrong places." Her horn glowed brighter. "And you still have something on your face."

183. A Matter of Principals

"Wait, you all were called on this friendship quest too?" Twilight said, walking into the map room and seeing that she and all five of her friends had glowing cutie marks.

"It must be a really important one," Fluttershy said.

"And terribly far away," Rarity added. Motioning to the map table.

"Just getting there will take days," Rainbow Dash said.

"Yall know what this means?" Applejack said. "There won't be any teachers left to run the school!" Everypony gasped. In a flash of purple light, Future Starlight appeared. She pointed at the map table.

"Ignore that. Discord's screwing with you," she said before disappearing again.

184. The Hearth's Warming Club

"Um Starlight, usually I put up those decorations," Rainbow Dash said, looking at Starlight Glimmer levitating herself to the ceiling rafters above the Hearth's Warming tree.

"I've got it this year," Future Starlight said, affixing some decorations and applying a liberal coat of slippery grease to the beam.

185. Friendship University

When Flim and Flam opened the Friendship University, one mare made it a point to be right at the very front of the registration line on the first day.

"Good morning madam!" Flim greeted.

"How can we serve you?" Flam asked. The mare took and paid for a set of the study notes.

"Actually, I'm serving you," Future Starlight said. She gave them each a copy of the court summons. "And you can shut-down this for-profit school."

"What!?" Flim gasped.

"There's nothing illegal about a for-profit school!" Flam said, nervously looking at the line of customers- er, students behind her. "If- if this even was one!"

"While that is unfortunately correct," Starlight said, "Plagerism is still really really illegal. Especially now that you have used it for profit!"

"But we haven't even-" Flam looked at the notes she had just purchased. He tried to snatch them back.

"Ah ah! These are mine now." Starlight said, putting them into a plastic evidence bag. She looked back at the two rugged stallions behind her. They revealed their badges, identifying themselves as officers of the law. They proceeded to arrest Flim and Flam. "See you in court."

186. The End in Friend

"Rainbow Dash and Rarity have very different interests that keep them busy," Twilight Sparkle explained to the class. Beside her on the stage were the two mares of discussion. "But being friends is so important to them that they always make time for each other." Rainbow Dash both blushed and Rarity chuckled nervously.

"Our day of fun was hard-planned," Rarity said. "What with Rainbow Dash's extremely time-consuming and erratically scheduled Wonderbolts ,

"And Rarity's weird fashion seasons," Rainbow Dash added. "She's working on her winter collection, and it's not even summer yet!

"But you still found time to be together!" Twilight said. "And that's what counts. See class? These ponies are models of true friendship in action."

"What amazing stuff are you going to do together?" Silverstream asked.

Rarity and Rainbow Dash exchanged nervous glances. They knew they couldn't tell them the truth. Both tried to say a fabrication. Both tried to say it at the same time. Both said something different. They each tried to say something else, each of them talking louder over the other. It began to devolve into a quarrel.

"Are we supposed to be learning something here?" Smolder asked. "Because this doesn't sound like compromising at all."

"Yeah! You guys have nothing in common. How can you be... friends?" - Gallus asked.

Rainbow Dash and Rarity blushed and chuckled even more nervously. Future Starlight groaned from the stage. It was so obvious to her, of course, but nopony else could see it.

"Rarity is the femme and Dash is the butch!" Starlight shouted out across the room.

"Ooooh!" the entire class said in understanding, writing down their notes.

187. Yakity-Sax

Pinkie Pie stood outside the Yakyakistan music shop. "Maybe I'll get a souvenir to bring back to Ponyville," she said to herself. Future Starlight appeared beside her and put a hoof on her shoulder.

"Or you could NOT do that," Starlight suggested.

"What? Why not?" Pinkie asked.

"Yakyakistan music shops have this really nasty habit of randomly bursting into flames."

"What? They do not. Don't be silly." Pinkie Pie's smile vanished. "Seriously. Don't be silly. That's my job!" Her moment of seriousness passed and she walked past Starlight towards the shop. Just before she could go inside, the entire music shop randomly burst into flames. "Holy Moly!" Pinkie Pie screamed, running away from the inferno. Ygritte ran screaming out of the blaze and then stopped, dropped and rolled in the snow, extinguishing the embers in her fur.

"She'll be okay," Starlight assured Pinkie. "Everything is going to be just-" Starlight smelled burning pizza. "AWW CRAP!"

188. Road to Friendship

"One caravan for two, all set!" Trixie said to Starlight Glimmer. "Oh, you brought luggage."

"You bet I did! Everything two ponies need for the road trip of their lives!" Starlight said. "Three 1000-piece puzzles. One copy of Dragon Pit, the best board game in the history of ponies. My famous collection of campfire spices and an inflatable raft. Did I forget something?"

Future Starlight appeared with a flash of purple light and slapped Starlight across the face.

"You don't need none of that crap!" Future Starlight said. "Actually, wait... keep the raft. And take this." She gave Starlight a single, small piece of luggage.

"What's this?" Starlight asked, opening the bag.

"Everything the two of you will need," Future Starlight said before disappearing again. Trixie looked in the bag as Starlight sorted through it.

"Let's see... ear plugs, hotel reservations, an almost-criminal amount of bits and..."

"Oh my," Trixie gasped as the last item in the bottom of the bag started to buzz like a nest of angry hornets.

189. The Washouts

Rolling Thunder was getting ready to help set up The Washouts show in Ponyville. She walked over to the equipment trailer to start unloading.

Starlight Glimmer was standing just outside the trailer, leaning against it.

"Oi! This is a restricted area! Crew only!" she yelled. "What are you doing back here!?"

"Pizza delivery," Future Starlight said, lighting a cigarette.

"You bloody off your nut!?" Thunder screamed. "Do you have any idea how much pyrotechnics are in there!?!"

"Yeah," Starlight said, flicking the cigarette into the trailer before disappearing.

190. A Rockhoof and a Hard Place

Professor Rockhoof was regaling the classroom with an exciting tale

"Ooh ooh! What happened next?" Yona asked.

"The Ursa Major backed me up against the wall," Rockhoof continued his story, "I looked at her, she looked at me, and I said,"

"Uh, Professor Rockhoof?" Twilight said from the smashed hole in the wall.

"Nope, guess again!" he said. "Oops."

"Class, why don't we take lunch early today," Twilight said.

"How 'bout no?" Future Starlight said from the back of the classroom. She munched on a box of popcorn. "It's a really good story and he's telling it really well. He has a real talent for it, Twilight. Like... a special talent. For story telling. Twilight? Hintity hint hint?"

"Okay! I get it!" Twilight said, rolling her eyes. "His special talent is story telling."

"One of many I'm sure," Starlight said, winking at massive stallion.

"But no smashing!" Twilight said.

"Twilight!" Starlight balked. "What I do in the privacy of my- oh wait, you mean like literally."

191. What Lies Beneath

Silverstream and her friends gathered around the floor grate of the library. A glowing crystal root from the friendship had dislodged the cover. "I only glanced at that plumbing book, but I'm pretty sure that's not supposed to be there," she said.

Smolder leaned down to peer inside.

What are you doing?" Ocellus asked.

"Dragon," Smolder said of herself. "Strange magical cave. What do you think I'm doing?" she asked. Future Starlight appeared with a flash of purple light.

"Or you could NOT do that," Starlight said.

"But what about the magical glowy thing?" Ocellus asked.

"Seems like something you should tell the maintenance faculty, or a teacher, or literally any adult, before you just go spelunking in an underground space. You could get caved in, asphyxiate in a low oxygen environment, or get exposed to radon! So if you're unless you're a ninja turtle, stay out of the sewer," she advised.

"What's a ninja turtle?" Sandbar asked.

"It's a turtle that's a ninja," Starlight said.

192. Sounds of Silence

Starlight Glimmer walked up the hillside to the dwelling of the recluse Kirin.

"Autumn Blaze?" she called out. The Kirin stepped outside to meet her.

"Yes?" Do I know you?" Autumn asked nervously.

"Not yet." Starlight gave her a bundle of Foal's Breath.

"Oh my gosh! You found some!" she said.

"Yup. Wanna go mess with the village's water supply?" she asked with a devious grin. Autumn squealed.

~

Applejack and Fluttershy were just about done packing when their cutie marks stopped flashing.

"Huh. I guess it sorted itself out."

193. Father Knows Beast

"Coming to Ponyville wan't an accident," Sludge said to Spike. "I was looking for you. Spike... I'm your father."

Before Pinkie Pie could win the longest gasp everyone vanished in a flash of purple light. Everypony re-appeared in the seats of the theater used for Celestia's play. The rest of Ponyville was already there. Sludge and Spike appeared in seats on the stage.

"Welcome back everypony!" Future Starlight announced as she walked down the aisle of the stands. "And now we find out the big reveal from the paternity test!"

"Paternity test!?" Sludge asked in confusion. He looked around the stage and saw a giant sign behind him. "Who the hell is Mulely Povich?"

"We have the results from testing your blood, Sludge," Starlight said.

"What!? When did you take my blood?" he asked.

"While you were sleeping!" Starlight said with an unnerving cackle! "And we compared it to Spike DNA sample!"

"Wait! How did you get MY DNA?" he asked.

"You're going through puberty! It was easy!" Starlight said. Spike blushed. Starlight Glimmer opened the envelope. "Sludge! What do you and Darth Vader NOT have in common?"

"What!? Who the hell is-"

"You are NOT the father!" she announced. "Our lie detector determined that THAT was a lie!" Red lights flashed and there was a buzzer. Everypony in the audience booed. "You are, however, the weakest link. Goodbye!" Starlight pressed the button on her remote and the rocket underneath Sludge's chair activated.

"I don't understand these referenceeeeeeeeees!" he screamed as he vanished into the sky.

"Looks like team rocket is blasting of again!" Starlight laughed.

"Starlight, when did you have time to set all this up!?" Spike asked.

"It's amazing what you can do when you don't have to sleep!" she said. "Let's just say that Pinkie's 'nose sugar' isn't actually sugar."

"Narc!" Pinkie grumbled. "Though that does explain all the forth-wall breaking."

194 & 195. School Raze

Dear Cozyglow,

Rumors of me exploding in the Golden Oaks Library are greatly exaggerated. I am indeed imprisoned in Tartarus. My time here has taught me that trying to take over Equestria is a bad idea, and I do not recommend it to anypony. You sound like a brilliant strategist and I'm sure you'll do great things for the Equestrian Royal Guard one day. In the meantime, I think you should focus more on your studies and your talent on the school chess team. And be nicer to your guidance counselor.

- Sincerely, Tirek

~

Starlight Glimmer finished writing the forged letter and sent it off to the troubled filly, setting her on the right path.

6697622
I just realised I put "¿" in English questions...
whoops :T

196. The Best Gift Ever

Twilight Sparkle was a little frantic when she left her castle to go shopping for her friends. She wasn’t paying attention and SOMEHOW managed to wrap her friends in a to-do list! Her friends were struggling to get free.

“Do we wanna know why you're wrapping up everypony in town?”, Rainbow Dash asked.

“Not wrapping paper. A to-do list.”, Spike replied. Sure enough, Twilight was going around the stands to get everything for her friends for hearthwarming.

“Two of these! Three of those! I'm gonna need ten of those! Just in case!” Twilight was trying to get everything in order when suddenly, Starlight JUST happened to teleport in front of her, making Twilight fall to the ground.

“Whoa! Twilight! You okay? Let me guess...Traditional holiday meltdown?”

“Starlight?! What are you doing here!? I thought you were going to spend hearthswarming with Trixie!” Twilight was shocked that she was here! “And how did you know?”

“Lucky guess.”, replied Starlight as she checked her watch. She had only a few seconds to do this. “Okay! You are trying to get everyone a special gift, but don’t know what to do? I got this!” Starlight charged up her horn and with that, seven new gift appeared! A handmade guitar for Rarity, a new bucket for Applejack, a few sweets for Twilight, a winterchilla for Fluttershy, warm socks for Rainbow Dash, a pile of gems for Spike and a recipe for pudding for Pinkie Pie!

“Get this recipe prepared in the oven...STAT! Don’t let Flurry Heart even GET to the stove!”, Starlight instructed Twilight. “And you! Make sure you put this winterchilla outside at sunset because then, it grows into a monster!”, she ordered Rainbow Dash. She checked her watch, and time was almost up! “Oop! Gotta go! Hope you have a good time tonight! Happy Hearthwarming!” And with that, she teleported away, leaving a confused group of friends.

“How did she even know what to get us? I mean I know I have warm socks, but do you think this is overdoing it?”, Rainbow Dash asked.

They all looked at the ground and saw a chocolate pizza!

“Mmmmm! Tasty!”, replied Pinkie Pie as she gobbled up the chocolate pizza in no time flat!

197 & 198. The Beginning of The End

Twilight and Spike were rushing to the entrance to Canterlot.

“Oh, good. We're all here.”, Fluttershy said.

“So, everypony got an urgent summons to the castle with no explanation?”, asked Twilight urgently.

Pinkie Pie was eager to know what the surprise was that Celestia and Luna were preparing for them! “Yup! I just love a good mysterious summons. What's it about? Do you think it's a surprise party? Hey! Why are we running?”

Twilight was really worried about what was happening so far. “Because something could be terribly wrong! Somepony turned bad? Another evil creature back for revenge?!” Just at that moment, Starlight showed up!

“Hold your horses, everypony!”, Starlight said, and everyone just skid to a stop! “You’ve got questions. I’ve got answers! Nopony turned bad! Yes, King Sombra is back for revenge! He’s gonna be at the Crystal Empire, And that’s what’s wrong!”

“SOMBRA’S BACK!?!?”, the Mane six asked in horror.

“Yes, he’s back. And, I just wanted to tell you that you better hop on that train to get there before anything else bad happens!”, Starlight replied. “Oh, and I almost forgot!” Starlight gave the the Mane Six the Elements of Harmony. “Keep these on you at all times! Don’t even think about putting them back until Sombra is truly defeated!”

The Mane Six immediately changed course for the train station! At that moment, Starlight told Twilight, “Oh yeah! And Celestia and Luna are both retiring.”

“THEY’RE RETIRING?!”, asked Twilight in horror.

“Yeah, And I just want you to tell them that you’re not ready for this sort of responsibility yet, and they’ll understand”, Starlight told Twilight. “Now, go on! You’ve got an empire to save!”

Twilight quickly obeyed Starlight’s order and ran off to the train station. At that moment, Starlight was about to teleport when she realized she forgot to give them a pizza!

“OH, CRAP!”, she shouted at the sky!

199. Uprooted

“Well, this is a surprise. Why are you all here so early? Did I send out the wrong back-to-school date?!”, Twilight asked when the Young Six entered the school of friendship.

“Oh, we're not here for school.”, Smolder told her.

“Yeah. We're back 'cause the Tree of Harmony called us here.” Sandbar called out!
Twilight gasped at that!

“Don't feel bad it didn't reach out to you. We kinda have a special connection with it after last year.”, Gallus told her.

“But the Tree couldn't have called you. It's gone! Sombra destroyed it!”, Twilight alerted them. Just then, Starlight randomly showed up for the 199th time in a row.

“(Buzzer sound)! Wrong answer, Twilight! I thought I literally told you to never take off the elements until Sombra was truly defeated! The tree is still there!”, Starlight told them. And she teleported them to the tree which was still in one piece! They were pretty shocked at that sight!

“It’s still there?!?!”, Twilight asked them.

“Yep, it sure is!” A few signed permission slips were shown in front of the Young Six’s eyes. “By the way, I told your kingdoms that you were going to honor it, and they’re okay with it! Honestly, Twilight! Have you learned nothing since last time I came to fix everything?!” Starlight then teleported away, leaving seven, no make that EIGHT pizzas falling down on top of them!

The Young Six were already enjoying their pizza. “This is what you ponies eat?”, Smolder asked Twilight to which She only replied with a shocked look on her face, “Uh huh!”

200. Sparkle’s Seven

At Canterlot Castle, Shining Armor was getting ready to invite his sister to come and test out the new security system. “I’ve got a good competition that will get Twily the chance to know who’s going to be sibling Supreme.”, he told Celestia.

Just then, Starlight showed up. “Shining Armor? I’ve got a special surprise for you.”

“Really?”, he wondered. “What would that be?”

“This!” Starlight clobbered him on the head, and snatched the crown from his head and left, leaving a pizza right in front of him.

(Back at the School of Friendship)
“Guess that explains your love of charts and so much else.” Starlight told Twilight. Just then, the Sibling Supreme crown landed on Twilight’s desk, along with future Starlight appearing before them.

“Here’s your prize, Twilight!”, Future Starlight told Twilight. “Oh, and when Spike comes, maybe share this with him! He’s gonna love it!” She then teleported away, and at that moment Spike showed up.

“Whoa! The crown’s already there?! How?”, Spike asked.

“Were you secretly cheating?” Starlight playfully asked Twilight.

“What? No! I wasn’t cheating! Don’t be ridiculous! Why would I ever want to cheat?” Twilight playfully answered. “And how did that pizza also get here?”

201. The Point of No Return

(At Twilight’s studying quarters, the day she was to arrive for Ponyville...)
“Spi-ike!”, Twilight called out. “Quick, find me that old copy of Predictions and Prophecies.” Just then, she noticed Spike had something on his tail. “What's that for?”

“Well, it was a gift for Moon Dancer, but...” The toy dropped out of the crumpled box.

“Oh, Spike, you know we don't have time for that sort of thing.” Twilight was about to throw a book under her bed, if Starlight hadn’t shown up!

“Whoa, Twilight! Better take a look under the front cover!”, Starlight told her. Twilight did so, and saw that the book she borrowed from the library was due today!

“Holy hay! That’s the book I was going to return to the library!” Twilight realized! “Thanks!”

“Don’t question it!”, Starlight told her. “And after you return that book, check for info on the Elements of Harmony!”

Twilight obeyed without a word, and dashed off to the library! She returned it on time, and she was nonetheless proud that some pony reminded her.

(Present day...)
“You don't understand, Spike! I have a perfect library book return record!” She told Spike, and she was still a little worried about the not-anymore overdue returned book.

“Had a perfect record.”, Spike corrected her.

“I've never turned in a book even a minute late!”, Twilight cried out. “And this one has been...” Twilight’s form suddenly sputtered and fizzed, like static on a television. She changed shape and size more than once! When it had passed, she remained as she always had been. “Uh, what was I worrying about?”

Spike was a little surprised at what happened. “Uh, Twilight? You okay?”

“I’m okay, Spike! I’ve never felt more better!”, she replied. “Hey, want to go to the Tasty Treat for lunch?”

“Oooooooookayyyyy.”, Spike answered a little confused. They both flew off to Canterlot for lunch, and instantly forgot about the box of memories that was right before the school.

202. Common Ground

“Come on, Sweetie! Quibble planned this out for you! Have some fun! You’ll enjoy it!”, Clear Sky told her daughter.

“I don’t care how fun it’s going to be!”, she answered stubbornly. “One thing’s for sure that it will not make me forget about Dad!”

At that moment, Quibble Pants showed up, and he was looking...a bit more muscular?

Clear Sky was shocked at this. “Quibble?! What’s with the muscles?”

“Oh, nothing much...just a surprise to show you how athletic I’ve become!”, Quibble replied excitedly.

Wind Sprint was surprised as well. “Here. Throw this ball to me.” He told her. Wind Sprint threw the ball, only to see that he caught the ball and threw it back hard at Wind Sprint, giving her a black eye!

“Quibble! Don’t you think you could be hurting her?” Clear Shy was horrified!

“Sorry! I just...” Only at that moment, Wind Sprint got up, still rubbing her eye. “You okay?”, he asked her.

“That...was...AWESOME!” Wind Sprint cried out! She hugged him tightly, smiling! “How’d you get muscles like that?!”

“Oh, well somepony wanted me to ‘show my athletic side’ so I headed to the gym, and poof! These bad boys appeared!” He told her, showing off his muscles.

“I’m so proud of you, Q!” Clear Sky told him! “Only next time, don’t throw it too hard to her.”

“Oh. Whoops.” Quibble blushed that he threw to her a little too hard. “Wanna go see the buckball game?”

“HECK YEAH!” They said with excitement. And with that, they headed toward the stadium, not know that Quibble would later be seeing Rainbow Dash. As he headed there, he just couldn’t help but wonder who suggested he work out.

(Later...)
“Quibble?! What a surprise!”, Rainbow Dash said.

“Yep! Can you believe it’s been so long?!” Just then, Dash noticed that he was now sporting muscles.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up! hold up!” She stopped him. “How’d you get all muscular?”

“Well, it’s a long story, but...would you believe that somepony just randomly told me I needed to work out.”, Quibble asked.

Rainbow Dash was shocked for a moment, but then she realized. “Starlight!”

“Who?” Quibble asked.

“Uh, nothing. How’s about we go the museum? I have to do this for a friend!”

203. She’s All Yak

“Hey, Yona, want to be my pony pal?”, Sanbar asked Yona. “We can enter the contest together.”

“But Yona yak. Yona not pony.” Yona replied. At that moment, Starlight teleported in front of them.

“Starlight?”

“Counsellor Pony?”

“Yes, it is I! I just wanted to give Yona a few quick tips for the dance.”, She answered. She then turned to Yona. “Okay. You’ve never been at a pony party before, so I’ll give you some tips. You don’t have to wear a dress, you don’t have to dance like everypony else, just have some fun with Sandbar and you’ll be fine!”, she told her.

“But, Yona not know HOW to have fun!”, Yona replied a little worried.

“Just stick with Sandbar, and he’ll help you out with having fun! Get out there, and party hard, you party animal!” Starlight told her.

“Okay! Yona won’t let pony pal Sandbar down! Thanks, Counsellor Pony!”, Yona thanked. Sandbar looked a little shocked as he tried to process what had just happened.

“Uh, Yona?”, he asked. “What just happened?”

204. Frenemies

Deep inside Grogar’s lair, Grogar himself was checking his ball and all of a sudden, Tirek came down to greet him in his usual way.

“Don’t trust anything that nosy little Pegasus says!”, he snapped.

“I don’t trust anything any of you say!”, Grogar snapped back. Just then, The magnificent Starlight Glimmer zipped down and decided to give him a piece of his mind.

“There you are. You can cut the act, Discord! I know that’s you!”, she sarcastically said to him.

“What?!” He asked. “Who are you, and what are you doing in my lair?”, he demanded.

“You know it’s me, Discord.”, Starlight replied. “You don’t have to disguise as him while I’m around.”

Grogar suddenly turned back into Discord. “Why, Starlight Glimmer!”, Discord greeted her. “You didn’t have to drop by this lair just so you could see me.”

“Actually, Discord, I do.”, Starlight answered. She showed him an antique-looking bell. “This is the bewitching bell that I found all the way from Mt. Everhoof, and the bell must be destroyed.” Discord was shocked. “No, no. Don’t thank me. I just came to save you and your group of baddies a lot of time that you could have wasted. Speaking of which...” Starlight fired a beam in Chrysalis’s direction, which not only caught the attention of both the changeling queen, but the magic-sucking minotaur as well.

“What’s going on?!”, the changeling demanded. Even Tirek wanted to know what was going on. Then, they saw it.

“STARLIGHT GLIMMER?!?!”, they both shouted.

“GET HER!”, Chrysalis shouted.

“I’d love to stay and chat. But as you know, duty calls!” She teleported away, and the two fired blasts every which way.

Discord turned back into Grogar. “NO! STOP! YOU’LL BE BLOWN TO BITS!!!”, he cried. They suddenly stopped, and noticed that the whole lair was about to collapse, which it did.

Tirek And Chrysalis rose from the rubble, and asked Grogar, Who was the last one to rise from the wreckage, “Well, Mr. Leader. What do we do now?”

Grogar had only one thing to say, now that his lair got destroyed. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

205. Sweet & Smoky

It happened when the new baby dragon eggs were just about to hatch. a few dragons had some other ideas.

“Hey, guys!”, one of the dragons said. “Check out this whole tub of lava!”

The other dragons were all excited and wanted to have it all to themselves. However, the unexpected happens. Starlight Glimmer arrived and told the dragons off. “You’d better stop that right now!”, she demanded. “There are baby dragons out there trying to hatch, and if you don’t watch it, you’re in for a whole heap of trouble if you know what I mean!”

“We don’t need you telling us what to do!”, the dragons told her! “Just buzz off!”

“I was prepared for that!”, she said. “Because, if you don’t put that lava back, I will tell Dragon Lord Ember, And you know how She is about the eggs not hatching because they’ll freeze to death!”

“Okay, Okay, Okay! We’ll do what you say!”, the red dragon said. “Just don’t rat us out to Ember!” And with that, they put the lava back where it was, which made the baby dragon eggs in turn hatch.

When Spike, Smolder And Fluttershy arrived, the red dragon was the first one to greet them. “Well, if it isn’t our pony friend, Spike!”, he snapped.

Starlight popped into existence once more. “Don’t even think about it!”, she warned him. “Spike just came with his friends all they just to see the baby dragons hatch. And if you mess with him, you mess with her! Got it?” Starlight was pointing to Ember when saying that. The red dragon nodded. “Good. Oh, and one more thing.” Starlight teleported a pair of bongos and a poetry outfit right in front of said dragon, and she was gone in a flash. The red dragon looked pretty embarrassed.

“Gar-Gar?”, Smolder asked. “You never did any of that poetry while I was away! You gonna play me a lick?”

The red dragon felt a little embarrassed once more as Fluttershy picked up the newly hatched baby dragons, and held them. Spike and Smolder were watching the red dragon, while he said “ OH, COME ON, SMOLDER!!!” He was also blushing as well.

206. Going to Seed

Applejack opened the door and in came some cats and a few of them were all over the place and some of them scratched her brother, Big Macintosh, waking him up. And guess who arrived in time to help the apple family.

“Howdy, y'all! Now, that's how you wake a pony up.” The figure said.

“Goldie Delicious!”, Applebloom cried out in excitement. She hugged her with all her might.

“Granny told me y'all could use a helpin' hoof with this here Confluence, so I came a-runnin'.” Goldie informed them.

“Well, with a harvest this big, we're grateful for all the help we can get. I guess.” Applejack replied. She wasn’t real big on the idea that Goldie Delicious came to help and would rather have some muscle to help. Big Mac agreed as well.

“It's too bad y'all ain't ever caught the Great Seedling. He'd have granted you a perpetual harvest, Confluence or no.”, Goldie told them. Applejack was just about to laugh when suddenly, she heard another knock on the door. She opened it and it was none other than that time traveler of fixing everything, Starlight Glimmer!

Applejack groaned. “What do ya want, Starlight? If you’re here to fix another mistake, thanks but no thanks!”

“Oh, no problem.”, she replied. “I’m just here for a little surprise for all of you.” She thrust out a bag that looked like it had something...alive and squirming around in there. She untied the bag, and out popped open...

“The great seedlin’?!” Applebloom was in a state of shock and excitement!

“Yep. I caught him, brought him to you, and now you’re gonna have a bumper crop of apples all year round!” She checked her watch and saw that was almost out of time. “Oh, I gotta go! and I almost forgot!” Before Applejack could object, Starlight teleported away and there was a pile of apple fritters in her place.

“Ah can’t believe Starlight actually caught her! Now we get apples all year round!” Applebloom shouted in glee!

“That was something, alright.” Agreed Applejack.

207. Student Counsel

“I totally respect my younger cousins' decisions to stay seaponies, but they've never been on dry land. Preparing for a visit with them is almost as much work as the research assignment Headmare Twilight gave me on hazardous fauna of the Everfree Forest! How would you describe a shower to creatures who live in water? So far, I've got "warm" and "steamy". Actually, steam has water in it.” Silverstream wanted to find out adjectives for dry land that don’t mention water, and Starlight herself was getting a little worried, because a lot of students were lined up to see her.

“Silverstream, there are a lot of students who want to see me today.” She told her. Just then, Future Starlight appeared without warning.

“Here are all the adjectives you need that feature words for shower, towel and a whole bunch of other words and what not!” Future Starlight reluctantly replied.

“Really? Wow! Thank you, Counsellor Starlight! I’ll go tell my cousin right away!” Silverstream replied and flew out of her office. Starlight was shocked at all this.
She left, and put an out of order sign to go get ready for the Spring Solstice party. But, when she arrived at the Spring Solstice party, there was already a cake prepared and her friends were there!

“Hi, Starlight!” Trixie was excited to see her. “ I’m so glad you could make it, and also the cake has already been made and delivered! I’m so proud that you were on top of things. I’m impressed!”

“Me and you both”, Starlight replied and went to join her friends.

208. The Last Crusade

Scootaloo’s aunts had just left for the weekend, leaving the Cakes to take care of them for the night. She was super excited to have aunts like them.

“Your aunts are so nice.” , Sweetie Belle complimented.

“Yeah. It's really cool they watch you while your parents are gone.” Applebloom agreed.

“I know. I just wish they lived closer. Nopony bakes like Auntie Lofty.”, Scootaloo agreed as well. Just then, there was a knock on the door. The Cutie Mark Crusaders answered it, and got a note. When Scootaloo saw it, she beamed with excitement like never before! “They're coming home today!” She cried in excitement!

“Who?”, Sweetie Belle wanted to know.

“My parents!”Scootaloo was so excited that her parents were finally coming home, and who else should show up, but Starlight Glimmer!

“Ugh. Not again! Alright, Starlight! What is it now?” Scootaloo asked a little flustered.

Starlight was ready to spill the beans. “Well, it seems like your parents are wanting to move to Shire Lanka and want you to come with them. I’m surprised this letter arrived after your aunts left.”

“What?!” Scootaloo was now shocked.

“They are also getting ready to sell the house and you’ll feel like you’ll never see your friends again.” Starlight told her.

“What?!” Scootaloo felt like she was ready to pull her mane out.

“Yes, and I know that’s a lot to take in. I suggest you go see your aunts and tell them all the schematics about your parents coming back. I bet they’ll understand.” She seriously told them.

“I don’t wanna move away!”, the bright orange Pegasus filly told her friends.

“Then, it’s clear what we must do.”, the bright yellow filly alerted.

“That’s why I got you three train tickets!” Starlight shown them the train tickets for the place where the little pegasus’s aunts were staying. “Now get going! There’s no time to waste!” The three fillies were confused. But, they understood. And zipped over to the train station. But before they left, they managed to salvage a pizza that also managed to drop on the ground for on the way.

209. Between Dark & Dawn

“Mr. Tortoise-Snap, I'm only asking nicely once! Let my friend go!” Fluttershy demanded. The Tortoise-snap obeyed and dropped Spike Who was now covered in the creature’s drool.

Twilight was getting ready to cast a teleportation spell. “And now, a simple teleportation spell should send him back to where he came from!”

Twilight cast the spell and he vanished. The princesses weren’t around to help them this time.

Her friends all cheered, and that’s when Starlight Glimmer showed up, cheering as well.

“STARLIGHT?!” They asked

“Yep. And I’ve already fixed some things ahead of time.”, she informed them. “I’ve already sent Celestia and Luna on a vacation, so they won’t have to interfere with your duties, and I’ve already taken care of the royal Swanifying ceremony!”

“Swanifying ceremony?” They asked.

“Yes, it’s how to get the swans to the royal garden. Oh, and take this!” Starlight gave Twilight an amulet about the sun and the moon. “Make sure you turn this twice to the left for night and twice to the right for day. If anything else otherwise, write to Sunburst.” The Mane Six were trying to take all this in, when Starlight was just about to teleport. “Here’s a list, and a pizza in case you get hungry!”

Twilight was glad the Princesses hadn’t interfered, but couldn’t help but wonder how Starlight even knew about the Swanifying. Nonetheless, she and her friends decided to back track it over to Canterlot and prepare for this occasion.

210. The Last Laugh

Cheese Sandwich was a little worried that everyone wanted gags and he didn’t want to let his fans down. He wanted to come up with some ideas for some gags. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. “Who is it?”, he asked.

“Mr. Sandwich?”, the business pony asked. “The name’s Sans Smirk. I have been seeing you spread laughter all over Equestria, and I was thinking of nopony better than you to start an amusement gag factory.”

Just then, unexpected reared its ugly head as Starlight Glimmer arrived. She looked at the contract and blueprint for the amusement factory. “So, this is your idea for an amusement factory, huh? Pretty cool. I like the idea, but have you ever worried about losing your laugh one day?”

“Me? lose my laugh? I’d never lose my laughter to help out these comedy loving ponies!”, Cheese replied.

“But, that’s just it!”, she told him. “Have you ever considered trying to approve of somepony’s gags, and staying all serious and one day, not being able to smile? Or even laugh?”

“Wow. I’ve never thought about that.”, Cheese thought after thinking about it for a while.

“Exactly”, Starlight said. “You’ll be so wrapped up trying to come up with new ideas for gags, that you won’t have any time to throw a birthday party or special attraction! So, unless you want to make serious funny gags without your enthusiasm...” She turned to Sans Smirk. “NO DEAL, MR. SMIRK!” She used her magic to send the contract and blueprint into flames.

“What...?” Sans Smirk asked in shock.

What happened next was having the door slammed into his face, but not before an all cheese pizza was thrown at his face.

211. 2, 4, 6, Greaaaaat

Rainbow Dash was totally shocked and bummed that she wasn’t coaching the buckball team. “I don't mean to sound ungrateful. It's just when you said you wanted my help with something important, I thought you meant something important.”

“The cheer squad is important.” Twilight advised. But Rainbow totally thought this was a joke. That is until, Starlight Glimmer showed up.

“Listen to your friend, Rainbow.”, she said. “Even I can’t take on helping others at the same time.”

Rainbow groaned. “Thanks, but no thanks, Starlight. Every time I get my chance to shine, you always try to mess it up!”

Starlight laughed at that remark. “Oh, I’m not here to make a joke. I’m just here to give you some advice. Try to imagine the cheer squad IS a buckball team.” Rainbow Dash didn’t quite get it. “I’m saying try to imagine the cheer squad as a buckball team. What if they mess up? How would you help a buckball team win? What if they lose? How would you root for your buckball team if they had no inspiration? How would you like that?”

After Rainbow heard that, she instantly realized what Starlight meant. “Oh, yeah! I got it now! I totally can think of them, and root for them as my own buckball team! Thanks, Starlight!” And with that, she dashed off. Twilight was shocked. Starlight told her, “It never hurts to give her some inspiration!” She then teleported out of sight!

212. A Trivial Pursuit

Twilight Sparkle had never anticipated Pinkie Pie, the element of laughter as a player and now, she might be stuck with her as her partner.

...or would be if Starlight hadn’t teleported and burned Pinkie’s player card when no one was looking.

Once that was taken care of, she was out of sight, and now, Twilight wouldn’t have to have her as a partner!

“And our final pair of contestants for this week's Trivia Trot is... Twilight and Rainbow Dash!” Granny Smith announced. Pinkie Pie was shocked, and her mane deflated!

“Alright, Egghead! You’re with me! Team TwiDash forever!” Rainbow cheered!

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Pinkie Pie shouted. “I was gonna make our TwiPie cake!” Now, Pinkie would have to be an audience member if that meant she wasn’t able to play without a partner.

213. The Summer Sun Setback

Twilight’s friends were getting ready to assign their duties to the earth ponies, Pegasi, and unicorns, along with Discord who was trying to not be so “discordy”.

“Could you not go popping us all over the place, please?!” Rainbow Dash asked anxiously.

“Time is of the essence. Let's go, team!” Discord ordered.

“We need to know what we're doing before we go and do it.” Fluttershy agreed. The Mane Six Sans Twilight read their job cards.

“Pinkie, you and I are givin' Braeburn and the Appleloosan ponies some adjustments to the menu.” Applejack informed Pinkie Pie.

“Fluttershy and I are meeting the Pegasi from Cloudsdale to give them changes to the weather.”, announced Rainbow Dash.

“Spike, we're going to update the Flaming Sky Firework Unicorn Troupe with Twilight's new vision.” Rarity told Spike.

Discord read his card. “And I'm supposed to... ‘make sure Discord doesn't do anything 'Discord-y’? Well, that's annoyingly specific!”

They all split up, not knowing that the legion of Doom was watching them.

“Increased security on a crowded holiday with Twilight and her friends bumbling around? This is impossible.”, Tirek grumbled.

“Oh, no. This is perfect. We need a distraction, and those ridiculous ponies just gave it to us.” Chrysalis announced quietly. Just then, she looked and saw Starlight right behind them. “Starlight’s right behind me, isn’t she?”

“Damn right I am!” Starlight shouted. And with a charge of her horn, one magic burst sent the whole legion sprawling all the way back to Tartarus!

A few minutes later, The group got back from their jobs. “We did it! We finally got our jobs done!” Rainbow Dash announced. “And Starlight didn’t show up! Maybe she learned her lesson after fixing everything! Maybe... she’s right behind me, isn’t she?”

The group wheeled on the meddling unicorn, who raised an eyebrow. "Well we don't even care! You're too late! We already SOLVED this problem, thank you very much! So you can just... go home! Or whatever it is you do!" Rainbow Dash paused for a few wheezing breaths, and if anything, Starlight's eyebrow only raised higher.

Applejack took a step forward. "Not the real problem?"

"Uh, nope."

"You've already solved it?", Fluttershy asked.

"Well, yeah."

"Lead the way." With a sigh and a firm tug, Applejack pulled the slack-jawed group along with her, with Discord tagging along.

"...so you see, the important part is that the community knows that they don't need to do much to really make a difference! Sure, I could just magic up the fix, but I don't know if that would count as a real solution, and we can't have you stuck here forever, now can we? So I... improvised."

"Starlight... what is all this?" Applejack gestured with a hoof to the collection of ponies standing in the overgrown park. Most were staring blankly straight ahead, but a few were listlessly trying to get the baked goods ready, start their magic display or control the weather, with very little success.

"They're here to help! With all of them together, you should have this all fixed up for the Festival of the Two Sisters in no time, and none of them will even have to do much!"

This was enough to finally spur words out of Rarity, who had been in a depressed funk the whole way over. "Starlight! You undo whatever you did to these innocent ponies right this instant! This is... this is horrible!"

"Don't worry about it! They'll barely know it happened, and it'll wear off as soon as Twilight, Celestia and Luna think you're done. It'll be fine! Anyway, I gotta go, I've already been here long enough-"

"Now wait just a goshdarn minute-"

"Sorry, can't! Oh! They'll listen to whatever you say, forgot to mention that. See you soon!"

"STARLIGHT-"

With a fizzle and a flash of light, she was gone.

They managed to return to the castle, where they found Twilight. “Twilight!” Rainbow Dash managed to shout. “We’ve got something urgent to tell you!”

“It's all coming together. I really think this is gonna be the best Summer Sun Celebration ever!” Twilight was already proud with them, not know her friends were worried.

“Well, yeah!” Pinkie Pie said. “But there has already been a catch!” She sheepishly giggled.

Twilight was confused. “What happened now, girls?”, she asked.

“We got there too late!” Rainbow Dash yelled in alarm!

“All of the other ponies were somehow now under a spell that makes them instantly do anything we tell them to!” Fluttershy alerted.

“And with little to no success!” Applejack added.

Twilight facehoofed and shook her hoof at the sky. “Damn you, Starlight!” She yelled.

214. She Talks To Angel

Fluttershy was already stressed out that Angel Bunny was annoying her, especially when she had too much work to do at her sanctuary. Angel finally managed to get Fluttershy’s attention when he told her he wanted Carrot extract.

“You just like the taste?! Ugh! Angel, that extract is in short supply! What's gotten into you?”, Fluttershy retorted. “Every day this week, you've been causing trouble when I have work to do! I know you can't talk to anypony else. But that's not my fault. I have responsibilities!” Fluttershy was past the breaking point when her bunny wanted time for her. But just then, when it couldn’t get any worse, Starlight arrived in a jiffy!

“Starlight Glimmer?!?!”, Fluttershy shouted. “I don’t have time to talk to you! I have too much on my plate!!!”

“That’s what I’m here to help you with.”, Starlight announced. Her friend was confused, but luckily she had it all down in a jiff! “He feels like you’re the only pony he can talk to, and all you do is ignore him. Well, Ifeel like he doesn’t care about your responsibilities.”

“Um, as you can see, we're kind of at an impasse.” Fluttershy laughed nervously.

“Well, how about you make time for him, when he really needs it! And also, you can get Twilight or Pinkie Pie or AJ to help you with your sanctuary.” Starlight suggested.

“Um, I’m not sure about that.” She informed.

“Well, if you were Spike, and he needed help, who would he ask to get that help?” Starlight asked.

“Um, he’d get help from Twilight and the others...just like I would need help with my sanctuary?” Starlight nodded. “Oh, thank you, Starlight!” She hugged her. “You’re the best at coming up with solutions!”

Just then, Angel patted her impatiently. “Oh, yeah! And I’d have some time for him!” The kind Pegasus finished.

“Now, that’s what I call a solution!” Starlight winked toward her, and was gone in a flash...as usual. And a carrot pizza was in her place.

“Oh, um...Angel? Do you want carrot pizza?”

215. Dragon Dropped

Spike was busy writing a letter to somepony or rather some creature that he would be there to hang out with her. He was just about to finish the letter, when suddenly, a burst of magic made him fall out of his chair and on his back on the floor!

“Oh, sorry, Spike!” The voice said. “It’s really hard not to bump into any creature in the dark!”

“Starlight?” Spike wondered. “Is that you?”

“Yes, it’s me!”, Starlight informed him. “Try to hold still.” And with that, she cast a spell on the Young drake who cowered in fear! When all the commotion was cleared up, he was confused.

“Uh, what happened?”

“Look behind you.”

Spike looked behind him, and was shocked to see an exact clone of himself smiling and waving at him. “Hi.”, the clone said.

Spike turned to Starlight. “WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?!”, he asked furiously.

“Oh, nothing much.”, Starlight replied. “I just cast Similo Duplexis on you! Do you not remember that after my magic training with Twilight?” Spike raised his claw furiously, and realized she might be doing him a favour. “Now you can be in two places at once!” She then pointed at the clone. “You know what to do!” The clone saluted her, and left for the ponyville post office.

Starlight was once again, gone in a flash! And a gem crusted pizza took its place...right in Spike’s lap!

At that moment, Rarity came inside the room. “Oh, there you are!”, Rarity said excitedly. “I was starting to think you weren't here. I realize this is last-minute, but I've decided on a quick trip to the gem cave!” Suddenly, she caught a whiff of something...cheesy. “Is that gem-crusted pizza?”

216. A Horse Shoe-In

Starlight was in her counsellor office talking to her plant, Ms. Philodendron or Phyllis, as she called her.

“I think you really spruce up the office, Ms. Philodendron.”, she complimented. She gasped. “Oh! I'm gonna call you Phyllis! Don't you look good, Phyllis?”

Suddenly, a note appeared over her head and landed on it, which she proceeded to check.

“Find Sunburst and appoint him as a new vice headmare. And appoint Trixie as a new guidance counsellor. It would probably help you with your new job as headmare of the School of Friendship.”

Starlight’s eyes widened and she grinned a ginormous grin. “Sounds reasonable.”, she thought to herself.

She checked the other side and something was written on it.

“If unconvinced, consult Twilight.”

Just then, Starlight was teleported against her will and landed on Twilight unexpectedly with decent force. It scared both her and Spike...but only for a second.

“Starlight!”, Twilight cried in shock. “I’ve been looking all over for you! Are you okay???”

217. Daring Doubt

When Groom Q.Q. Martingale published the novel, “Daring Do And the Fallen Idol,” one mare made it a point to be right at the very front of the line on the day it was to be released. “Good morning madam! How can I serve you?" Martingale asked. The mare took a good look in disgust at the description of the book AND the cover as well.

“Actually, I'm glad you asked.”, Starlight said. She gave him a copy of the court summons. “Police! Arrest him!” Two stallions in police uniforms grabbed Martingale by the arms. “You’re under arrest, Martingale!”, Starlight retorted. She then pulled the disguise off of him. “Or should I say Dr. Caballeron?” The customers behind her gasped.

“What!?" Caballeron gasped. “There's nothing wrong with trying to list my facts about Daring Do!” He objected, nervously looking at the line of angry customers behind her.

"While that is unfortunately correct," Starlight said, "Plagiarism is still very illegal. Especially now that you have used it to upstage a hero whom one of my friends believes to be her idol!”

"But I was trying to... “ Caballeron looked at the notes she had just purchased. He tried to snatch them back.

"Ah ah! These are mine now." Starlight said, putting them into a plastic evidence bag. The two police stallions threw him out of the store and into the squad car to take him to prison. “See you in court!” And with that, she set the whole stand on fire, and teleported out of existence, not looking back at what she just caused to Caballeron’s career!

218. Growing Up Is Hard To Do

You mean we spent all this time planning a trip and none of us asked any pony to take us?!” Sweetie Belle was now a combination of stressed and angry as she bucked the board down to the ground.

“In our defence,” Scootaloo reassured, “Every other part of the trip was planned well.”

Sweetie Belle was about to chew both Scootaloo and Applebloom out for forgetting to ask about a chauffeur, when there was a knock on the door.

“Howdy, y’all!”, Applejack greeted them.

“Applejack?” Applebloom asked curiously. “Are you taking us to the fair?”

“Eeyup.”, she replied. “Big Mac’s out sick, but luckily, Starlight came by and said that I should make time for you youngins. She insisted I get Granny Smith to take care of him while we’re gone.”

“Starlight asked you to get Granny Smith to take care of your brother, and YOU’RE okay with it?” Scootaloo asked.

“Yep.”, Applejack answered. “No doubt about it! Now, let’s hustle over to the Apploosian County Fair! Daylight’s a burning, and we don’t want to miss it while we still have time!”

The Cutie Mark Crusaders were excited that they were finally going to the fair, and high-tailed it with Applejack over to the train station. Little did they know that there would be a pizza waiting for them when they got back to the clubhouse.

Little did they also know that right behind the clubhouse, Starlight Glimmer herself was checking the problem off her list. “Well, that takes care of that.”, she said to herself out loud. “Now to fix that problem with Big Mac and Sugar Belle.”