We are nearing Christmas, and in celebration, our esteemed Lord Vader has commanded that all TIE fighters change the left laser to red. He felt it would give an air of cheer to the interstellar slaughter that is to happen in the near future. Additionally, he has wrapped a bit of garland around the end of his lightsaber. We've all agreed that it really makes the occasion.

Johnson made eggnog, which is The Emperor's favorite. He'll often take the whole batch, then grin at us, saying "You want this, don't you?" And we do. Johnson really does make the best eggnog.

The stormtroopers are still complaining about the chafing their suits are causing, but when do stormtroopers not complain about something? First it was loud-mouthed farmers. Then it's tricky old men and their confusing hand waving. Seriously. Stormtroopers. What are you going to do, eh?

Here in the Planning Devision for Oppressive Planetary Domination, we are all a-titter. The boys in Architecture and Engineering have announced what they're calling a "Super Star Destroyer", and we've been asked to come up with the slogan for the project. So far, we've got:

Super Star Destroyer: Putting the 'Super' in supernova. (It's McGillicutty's. No one else likes it, but he's so pouty when he gets shot down.)

From black holes to black ops, The Super Star Destroyer can do it all!

Law enforcement at light speed!

They are still works in progress, obviously, but I think they have potential.

In sadder news, the culinary decks are reporting a shortage of festive holiday sprinkles. The eggnog is nice, but it's hard to work up the proper enthusiasm without merry AT-AT and speeder bike-shaped gingerbread cookies with multi-colored sprinkles. Mark my words, those rebels will pay for their sugar sprinkle embargo!

Okay, that's all the news from the Death Star. We're all hoping the messy business with these upstarts ends soon, and we can get back to workaday tyranny once more. It's so awkward when you don't know exactly what your day to day will be, but we are trying to make the best of it here, even without the sprinkles.

This is what happens when you're bored but can't focus on writing fics because of the presence of your coworkers isn't it.

3902150 Pretty much...