Tingly!

3337939 SPORTS!!!!!

3337950

Save me... I went to Youtube and I can't leave!

3337990 turn off your computer and leave for ten minutes.

3337946

^This^ is why I don't go on youtube. I just spent an hour watching Robot Chicken Clips.

I still like this fad:

3339655 Cool.

Your ass. Put it in the air.

3342729

I have achieved enlightenment. Chrysalis was really interested in what Twilight was showing her, because that's the mating dance for changelings. She just had to feign disinterest because Shining totally would not have liked to put off his wedding. And Shining's daughter with Chrysalis would have been so confused if she had two mothers.

Of course, Rarity was there too because, honestly, nopony puts Rarity to the side when comparing the beauty of flanks

3339655

We are pleased.

3342771
And Cadance was always a spy. She infiltrated Canterlot to teach the dance to Twilight as soon as possible.

Also, I've finished writing this exchange:

"The sun didn't-" Cadance's jaw dropped. "This was the Summer Sun Celebration. Nightmare Moon returned." Her eyes burned with the fury of a thousand suns. "I risked my life that night! My friends and I nearly died in the Everfree Forest! And the Captain of the Royal Guard, my brother, was [REDACTED] in my foalsitter the entire ing night?!"

"Twilight, dear, you've been in my body long enough to know that isn't possible. Don't sell your brother short like that." Twilight strutted up to Cadance and started circling her. "Ever since, we've tried our best to duplicate that night every time a threat to Equestria was defeated."

Cadance blushed. "Are you...sizing you up?"

"Yes, I want to with myself. Is that wrong?"

"YES!" Brother and sister shouted in unison.

Twilight pouted. "But when else will I get this chance? I've always loved my legs. You know what I'm talking about, Shining. And you, Twilight, you've never wanted a piece of yourself?"

Cadance studied her real self for a moment. "I guess I have a pretty sweet ass."

Shining sank back to the floor in total disbelief.

"You have the sweetest ass, Twilight." Twilight shook it around a bit. "Doesn't it deserve some attention?"

I have no idea where I'm going with this story, but I am laughing my head off writing it.

3342780

It sounds like I need to take this conversation to PM to actually continue saying what I'd like to say.

3342729 I retaliate with...

3342806
Hey, Fleetfoot got some attention. Nice to see.

3342812 unfortunately she only got attention because the creator didn't want to change the walk to a male model for Soran. it's the same guy who did the twidash hearts and hooves day thing.

The greatest movie line ever:

It goes with everything.

3344423 Wrong!!

Now the hour has come at last...

A second contest has begun.

No, Minds Eye, no. Not yet...

3350584 that archer is racist, always hitting the black part.

3350584
need to adjust the sights.... ummm... how would you adjust the sights on a bow.... ummm... adjust the eyes?

The beautiful game.

3352691 ...
...
...
...I don't watch sports...

I will write a story about this picture one day.

3358033

Fluttershy hates the train station. It's where her friends left her when they went to visit the Crystal Empire. But she can't hate her friends, no matter how much it hurt to see them go. It must be the train station's fault.

3358122
Her animals will spread gasoline on the tracks, too. Then she'll get Philomena to light herself on fire and burn it all. That will be Phase I of her plan to knock Equestria back to the stone age so her pony friends and her animal friends can all live in harmony together.

3358147

Because her plans have worked so well in the past.

I'd expect it to be a comedy

3358151
Scratching plans to say the pet adoption drive in season four was a plan to put assassins in every ponies' home...

Actually...

Also, do you know if that groundskeeper has a name? I've had an idea for a short 1k word one-shot with him.

In Praise of the Index Fund

The what?

The index fund. It is one of two varieties of the mutual fund, the cornerstone of any successful investment portfolio.

Investment portfolio? What the hell does that have to do with ponies? Nothing. Haven't you been paying any attention to me this last month?

So what's a mutual fund?

A mutual fund is like a giant barrel that everyone can throw money into. The people in charge of the barrel keep track of who threw in what, and then they go invest that money for you. They come back every day to let you know how they did. Hopefully, your money will be worth more at the end of the day.

You can find a mutual fund to invest in any kind of commodity you want. Stocks, bonds, cash, real estate, gold. I swear to you, I once read an article about a fund that would somehow try to invest in conjuncture with the future earnings of Arian Foster, an NFL running back. For the sake of simplicity, I will focus on stocks for the remainder of this...thing. Column. Ramble. Whatever.

Think of the stock market as a Blackjack table. You sit down, place a bet, and try to outsmart the dealer. What card is coming up next? Do you take the gamble, or stand firm? How can you possibly know without some kind of strategy? How can you invest in a company's stock without knowing what that company does, where they've been, or who they are?

That's where mutual funds come in. What if, instead of playing yourself, you could bet on an individual player? You could give him your money and trust him to win for you. You could hear about his strategy, research his past, and make a decision between him and any other players sitting at the table. Betting on a player is known as an actively managed fund, meaning someone is in charge of every stock and every decision that comes with the position. You are still trying to outsmart the dealer, only you're trusting someone smarter than you to do it.

Now what if you had the option to bet on the dealer?

That is an index fund. Why bother outsmarting the dealer? The House always wins. Sure, one guy might hit it big and win a thousand bucks in a hand, but what about the three other players who lost five hundred each?

The index fund tracks the performance of the stock market itself. Your money is spread over more stocks than a human could possibly keep track of on his own. If one stock goes bust in an actively managed fund, it could really bring your money down. If one stock goes bust in an index fund, there are hundreds, possibly thousands, of other stocks in the fund to keep your money afloat.

One more benefit of the index fund is the cost. Mutual funds run on this thing called an expense ratio. It works like taxes withheld from your paycheck; the people in charge of your fund take a certain portion out of your earnings, and you just never see that money. Most funds come close to, or go over, a 1% expense ratio. Doesn't sound like much, right? Well, index funds routinely charge around 0.25%. You know what that means? More money to your name. Over the years or decades you hold your investment, those savings will add up.

Warren Buffet, essentially the Michael Jordan of investing, has praised this fund from a company called Vanguard in the past. It tracks 500 stocks from big names like Apple, Microsoft, and Coca-Cola. I once read an article about a bet Warren Buffet made with a group of fund managers. He would put money in that fund while they did their thing in their fund, and they would see who had more money in 10 years. Buffet is winning, and he isn't doing a damn thing. He lets the market work for him.

There are drawbacks, of course. The fund I linked above has a minimum investment of $3,000. I know right? Wouldn't it be nice if we all had three thousand in cash lying around? And there is always the chance of a market collapse like in 2008; however, while a human might panic and dump everything, keeping your money in an index fund will keep you in a good position for the eventual recovery.

Therein lies the rub. Investments are enormous decisions. Ideally, you would set it and forget it, leaving your money locked away for years and decades until you really need it. For example, you would cash out to buy a house, pay for life-saving medical care, or your eventual retirement.

Do not make these decisions lightly. They aren't meant to be made on the spot or even overnight. Take your time, do your research, and make a smart choice. Just remember that the House always wins. Unless the government collapses, taking the economy with it. Then we'll have bigger things to worry about than our retirement.

Now that I think about it...

Hey Timelord, is it cool if I crash with you if the US government collapses?

3358978 I don't think you'd want to live with my sister.

3358995
Your sister is worse than anarchy? She's worse than riots in the streets with no civil authorities to curtail them? She's worse than roving death squads hunting for anything of value?

I'm honestly impressed.

3359027 she used to through random things, like small glass bottles of nail pollish, at me just for breathing or walking into the room.

In 2006...

And 2010...

But now...

I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN!
I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN!
I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN!

3 points! Retribution! Good start!

I saw this movie in theatres as a kid. Now the song is being used to sell macaroni and cheese. I am getting old.

3363702 That was dangerously high concentrate epic right there.

I once referenced this line in a story. Cloudchaser said this and gave Rumble a wooden sword so he could go fight monsters outside. I even named the chapter "The Legend of Rumble." No one got it.

I was disappointed.

3368835

3368835

I actually got it... But I thought it was a reference to the fanfic "It's a dangerous business, going out your door"

3368835 Wow. Even without ever playing that game, we'd have still gotten that. It's one of the most famous video game lines in existence, isn't it?

3368843
My 14 and 13 year old nephews just showed me that song yesterday...

3368847
Well, now you know where they got it from.

3368850
I know right? It's the very first thing you see when you start playing the launching point for one of the most beloved game franchises. It's like not knowing where "The Princess is in another caste" came from.

Now that I've said that, I'm totally working that other castle line into a story one day. I swear it.

3368868 Because you mentioned a Mario quote.

3368847
Actually, no, that's Tolkien, isn't it? "It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door." I know that line is in the movie, at least.

3368882

It's in the book, too. I weren't gonna say nerthin'.

3368872 I choose... Toad. Saw that video in a livestream chat between Bassie and Famous a while back. It's hilarious!

just found this.

Saw this posted in another forum today. Too good to not share.

Too bad he's a Mary Sue and OP as hell.

3371122
Not that OP.