So, uh ,yeah, a thing happened · 2:15am Jul 28th, 2012
Naughty words ahead. I only mention it because I don't usually swear in these blogs =3
You may have noticed that I recently released a fic entitled Bearded Lust 2: The Re-Beardening. I feel like I should explain.
I had super-shitty day at work, one of those vast monstrosities of an utterly mundane but utterly horrible day where sure, nobody died, but every damn thing that could conceivably go wrong went wrong. The kind of day that makes you seriously consider just walking out and giving up. And the only thing that stopped me doing just that was that on my way to work, I was thinking about a Skype conversation in which Rarity and Celestia having angry, public sex was mentioned for whatever reason. So I spent the whole day thinking up dumbass ways to make that into a story, and, well, Beards happened in my head. And laughing constantly at that was enough to stop me, I don't know, throwing a Tesco PDA at a customer so hard that they merged into a composite human-PDA being before coughing their twisted, never-meant-to-be last away in the cold, merciless house of indifferent capitalism.
So... yeah. I've shattered my usual PG rating and, if that's not your bag, I'm sorry. But it was hella fun to write and it's actually kind of fun having it just sitting there in my stories list, a total wild card.
Except for the map-of-Equestria thing. I seriously don't even know what the fuck.
I'll probably do a post about it being clop too once I get my head around the fact that I always said I'd never write poneporn and then I spend six hours fucking around with a comedy sex fic.
Anyway thanks, guys and gals. If you can stomach horsecock (RARITY CERTAINLY CAN'T HOHOHO) it would be cool if you read it. I think it's pretty funny.
EDIT:
[03:01:45] Alexstrazsa: Arcainum
[03:01:47] Alexstrazsa: Arcainum
[03:01:49] Alexstrazsa: What.
[03:01:51] Alexstrazsa: What the fuck.
[03:01:53] Alexstrazsa: http://wtfponyfanfiction.tumblr.com/post/28167544502/twilight-impacted-with-celestias-head-her-horn
Yesssssssss.
Is there a "Bearded Lust 1"? :3
Heh, at least you got this out of your system. I've been tempted to write my own porn material but then I remember that I'm too chickenshit and let someone else do it.
And hey, if you're going to do just one, make it the most effed up, off the wall, completely insane thing it can be. No sense in holding back. And boy, did Celestia NOT hold back.
Yeah... poor Twi.
Also, sorry to hear that your work day was crappy. I've had those days too where I want nothing more than to reach through my phone, pull out the person on the other end and shove their face into my monitor until they've become my latest background rotation.
Wat?
Well, at least you have the good sense to be ashamed of it :P
Now the only question is, do I read this before Harpflank because it's short and it would be awkward if it was the first thing of yours I read? Hmm...
Also sorry that you had such a shitty day. At least you dealt with it in what I shall cautiously say was a healthy way.
THE STORY IS A VICTORY FOR ALL BEARD KIND
Anyway I had to hold back from laughing loudly throughout (It's late and I don't want to have to explain this to my family)
251758 There is not =( I am a great fan of the orphaned sequel as a comedic device.
Wait, that was boring. I mean, uh, bears ate it. Mantis bears, with obsidian wings and claws of living fire.
251774 Yeah, it was sort of also partly a response to the fact that I find it super-super-super-hard to write actual ornpay, so i just make it dumb and stupid and moronic so I can pretend it was ironic instead of just bad.
251914 iunno
252091 SHAME IS FOR THE WEAK
Also you should totally read Beards first, it'll make everything else seem that much better =3
252167 well then I'm glad it made you laugh! Or not laugh. You know what I mean.
I always liked the expression "By Celestia's Beard!"