Anyone got some pony-yarn to spin, 'cause I'm lookin' to preread! (World's slowest pre-reader for hire...rent? Free? Free.) · 9:04pm Feb 7th, 2014
Your Antagonist checking in from lovely Fort Drum, NY,
So, yeah, I'm falling back into a self imposed literary study period (in which I'll still be writing of course) and as a result, looking to get back into the habit of pre-reading/editing/reviewing/story advising. See, all that time I spent dealing with and occasionally assisting the fresh privates in OSUT made me remember how much I miss helping out folks as a subject matter expert(that's questionable isn't it?), and then I realized that it's just as applicable here. Whether it's helping newer writers flush out the raw potential of their stories or slaving for the old fogeys who've been hanging around for about a minute and have the most chaotic writing methods (as if I should talk...) I just miss the process of unfucking, advising, and appraising, plus the pressure of having a 'boss' makes me read more.
If you do find me a suitable candidate for being your preader/reviewer-- the shit I said I wanted to do above, please do note a few things about me:
A) I work, sometimes for days or weeks at a time. I'll let you know ahead of time what my schedule looks like.
B) I don't intend to stop my own writing. Once I get into a project of my own, everything else is on backburner until I lose steam. Could take minutes, could take hours.
C) I read slowly but precisely. The plus side to this is that I'll have extensive reviews for you since I can take the time to soak in every detail and your editing would be top titties as well... it'd just take a while.
D) Any fics involving insects or incest shoot to the top of my list like a lube-slathered bratwurst through the O-ring.
E) I am not a fucking wizard, merely a high alchemist of the red-pen. If your grammar is hella broken and your formatting is blocky, the most I can do is break down and cry.
F) I'm a very forward guy. Comments I leave can be direct and pointed, which can be misinterpreted as meanness. Grow a pair.
G) I'll read most genres. You know what I write, don't be afraid to ask.
H) Zebracakes are my lord and savior.
So, that said, if you're looking for any of the aforementioned services or just looking to throw another editor on your team of fifty editors, lemme know, I might be down.
Loathe,
Your Antagonist.
Sounds good. I may have to take you up on your offer in future c:
I may take you up on that offer, considering the rather sporadic nature of my own literary prose. I subscribe heavily to Earnest Hemingway's opinions on writing, if you catch my drift.
1807713
Damnit Pearple, you beat me to the punch yet again.
1807767
Pearple Prose always comes first.
Wait...
If you don't mind, I wouldn't mind having an ultracritical once-over done of either Sweetie Bot or Dreamscape. It's high time I pulled my pants down and exposed my most sacred place to some bull-whipping, chaining, ball-gagging criticism.
My writing place.
A warning - both stories are 15,000 words or so.
1807713 1807717 1807767- Just shoot me a PM whenever, I usually try to reply in a swift and timely manner.
1807803 No prob, I'll go through at a sluggish pace.
1807884
I write about as quickly, so take whatever time you need.
What are zebracakes? Personally, Tyrion Lannister is my lord and god.
Would you read ma story?
Oh, shit. Antag editing?
I still have nightmares.
Sign me up!
Insects? Insects??
1808880 The mere thought of this bugs me.
Alrighty. I've got a new story about Photo Finish up and am in dire need of someone to take a shit on it. So feel free to hack it in eadible pieces and shove it down my throat with some vinegar. And here's the story!!!
Dragon