Dear Princess Cellybean,
Today I learned two very important things. First and foremost: According to Rarity, a lady does not get drunk, she gets fun. There is a subtle but significant difference between the two. Being drunk means you have an excuse for making poor decisions. Being fun is the same thing, but you're a slut.
The second thing I learned is not to trust Ponkus Badonkus with large sums of money, especially when visiting new places. I put her in charge of buying supplies in Rockwell before we set out for Arimaspi's Ruin, but she spent half of it on a bottle of super fancy wine,* which she and Rarity drank in a single sitting.
If we cut corners, we could have bought enough supplies with the other half of our original amount, but unfortunately Rarity was fun. She "dragged" Pinkie (I doubt she put up much of a fight) to a club where they threw the rest of our money at exotic dancers. Rarity was then kicked out for getting grabby with one of them.
Anon had to burn through the emergency fund you gave him to buy food and tents for us so we wouldn't all die in the wilderness. There's no guarantee we won't die anyway, so here's hoping the rumors about the gargoyle prove false. If we live, I'll have to give you the full rundown in person. We don't have enough money to buy any more parchment.
Your purple Red Ranger,
Spark Plug* To be fair to Pinkor, the label was really colorful and buyable.
Also, I skimped on some of the supplies and kept about a third of the emergency fund. If we need to fix some hurty boo-boos, I'd rather not trust someone to work for free with the promise of payment from the crown later. You never know.
Love, Anon
Jesus Rares... Just... What?
Raunchity
9995443
Unexpectedly good booze? Pinkie grabbed a bottle of absinthe or summat instead of wine?
Smart move there, Anon. Very smart move.
Dear Anon,
Here are the royal bagpipes. You have permission to use such funds that are leftover after the mission for a Bar trip as long as the next day you serenade them with the music of your people.
I want pictures of the results.
Celestia.
Dear Anon,
I'm sending some emergency funds for you.
And your army bugle. Be sure to use it on Dresser and Partyer.
From HRH
Princess Celestia
Ah. Anon being the responsible one.
Kinda alarming.
9995505
I call it "Responsibility of the sane" basically you could be the most uncaring person ever, but if SOMEHOW, everyone else starts caring significantly less than you, you will immediately feel a need to be the smart and concerned one.
9995650
I'm getting the feeling the MLP universe/Harmony basically kidnapped Anon from his world just to keep Book Horse under control and from destroying the place.
Anon suddenly sees a raise in his royal stipend, and a 55 gallon drum of whatever coffee he likes when he returns to Ponyville.
9996243
The only guaranteed effective neutralizing agent for a creature of untamed chaos is a creature of methodical, disciplined chaos. Oppositional order will only spur them on.
9995650
I... huh. You know, I think you might actually be onto something with that.
9995453
Grabbity.
One of the things I love about these two series is just coming in after they've had a day to stew and reading the comments. Usually I glance at whatever else has been said and then don't think about it again (unless I'm rereading a story after a year or two).
9995505
no shit.
"Cellybean" is a pretty cute nickname tbh
9996321
No. The only guarantee against creatures of Chaos is faith in the Emperor.
Please consult your local Commissariat office for immediate absolution.