Dear Princess Vitamin C,
I did another oopsie.
I tried fixing Manehattan’s alarmingly high suicide rate by casting the want-it-need-it spell on the concept of life. The spell technically worked, so that’s cool. Every living creature in a ten mile radius was filled with an irrepressible craving for life. The making of life, to be specific. It only lasted ten minutes thanks to the scope of the spell, but that’s more than enough time for accidents to happen. Expect a marked increase in the census next year.
Whether this affects the suicide rate is yet to be determined.
Your lack of impulse control,
Plum Bum
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Fucking Sparkle.
You know when I heard that she was making everyone want life; I thought she was going to create a new minority comprised entirely of the undead.
then I heard that it was the making of life and thought;
Twilight: If I can't be a necromancer, I'll just make everyone ELSE a necromancer instead! Then there would be no reason for her to say no and I can't get in trouble since I am technically not practicing necromancy at all!
Then I saw the census and thought, "Oh."
I am sad now.
_______________
then I realized that the story was back and am happy again.
Um... I don't see why that's bad-
... Oh dear god, purple... What the HELL?!!
en.meming.world/images/en/4/4a/Modern_Problems_Require_Modern_Solutions.jpg
Slaanesh approves of this plan.
Going to be a lot of unforking family trees this generation. Oh well. At least Applebloom won't have to feel so alone anymore.
This is why the letter should’ve been addressed to Vitamin D....
Unwanted children and child support will probably raise the incidence of suicide, Purple Smart.
She roofied a city?
Wow...
god i love this story
10173567
It would also work normally since the sun is a source of Vitamin D. Missed opportunity, very disappointed
I always expect to be horrified by this version of Sparkle or laugh my ass off (racist I know). This one managed both. Bravo!
10173443
Sometimes the old methods work better than the new ones. But it depends on the situation.
So she made an entire town go into an orgy craze.
Cool.
TWACKLE, didn’t you learn ANYTHING from the last time you performed that spell? Literally AT ALL?
okay then. damn it, twilight, you dont learn.
10173414
No. I think she was the only one NOT fucking at the time.
If you can't avoid people killing themselves, just make them compensate by MAKING BABIES !i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/facebook/000/022/138/highresrollsafe.jpg
No amount of curse words or therapy is going to make this okay. At this point, Purple Smart makes RD seem smart and Starlight seem sane.
It seems Princess Buns of Suns failed to teach her faithful protege the ever important concept of being very specific with your intent. Either that or The Sparkle Spaz noped out of that lesson when she realized how much it would narrow her perception of what was possible on a conscious level. I don't know which is more likely, and that's very concerning.
Okay, so I'm going to assume that some of the first things that popped into my head technically make me the psycho here... :D And yes, if what I think happened happened, the suicide rate may see a sharp increase in the coming weeks.
10181045
Well hopefully that'll keep the population balanced out with the upcoming baby-boom lol