Unforgettable and Unforgivable

by Catpaw616

First published

Despite being redeemed and accepted by the Princess of Friendship, Starlight's guilt for her actions haunt her daily life and it never seems to go away.

Starlight Glimmer, who was a vengeful villain just a few months ago, has been accepted by the Princess of Friendship as her very first pupil.

But despite Starlight now living a happier life, she now reconsiders if she even deserved it.


Alternate cover by Starcoder. Thanks!

No Room For Pleasure

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Starlight helped Twilight clean out her bookshelves by stacking the books that they carried out. And while Starlight did the heavy lifting, Twilight was dusting the bookshelves with her sweeper. And with the dust going into her nose, Twilight let out tiny sneezes a few times, which made Starlight chuckle by how cute the Princess's sneezes sounded like.

"For someone who likes cleaning, you are not exactly good at keeping the bookshelves so pristine." Starlight said jokingly.

"I tend to let a few things slide." Twilight shrugged. "I'm not the Princess of Cleaning after all."

"No, but you act like it." Starlight rolled her eyes playfully as she continued sweeping the dust off the books and stacking them in organized piles.

As she continued to help Twilight, a question struck Starlight's mind. "Is there a reason Spike isn't joining us? The job would be done a lot quicker if we had another hoof, or claw, in this."

"I've had Spike do many things for so long, he deserves a day off." the alicorn answered her before turning her head to face her. "And since you're staying here now, you can be his replacement!" Twilight smiled.

Starlight immediately looked alarmed. "Oh, uh, I don't know about that one, Princess."

Twilight's smile faded away. "It was a joke, Starlight. And..." she stopped when she touched Starlight's chest with her hoof. "You don't have to keep calling me Princess."

"But it feels like I should." Starlight retorted. "After all, I get to stay here? Rent free?" she pushed Twilight's hoof away and continued. "After what I did to you and your friends? It makes me feel like a-"

"You're doing it again." Twilight interrupted her quickly.

Starlight opened her mouth to continue, but she eventually stopped and hung her head.

"Yeah, I guess I did." she said sadly as her ears lowered.

"Starlight, I know what you did was wrong, but you could've made things a lot worse if you ripped that scroll." Twilight started explaining. "But you didn't."

"What does that mean anything?" Starlight started getting a little frustrated. "You were just lucky I had a change of heart."

"Exactly!" Starlight was startled by Twilight's excited loud voice. "You had goodness in your heart and you accepted my hoof instead of easily ripping the scroll."

Starlight remained silent.

"What matters now is that you are being taught the valuable ways of friendship, and you have me, and my friends as your teachers." she soothed her student.

She extended her hoof to Straight but she pushed it away.

"I don't know." Starlight said. She started rubbing her head.

She looked at Twilight with a sorrow expression. "I think I need to be alone for a little while."

Before Twilight could respond, Starlight exited the room and slammed the doors behind her as Twilight watched with pity.

Oh Starlight. Twilight thought as she saw her student go. She hated seeing her pupil once again getting guilt-tripped by her past; and she now started to wonder if Starlight will ever truly get go of the pain. All I can do is try.


After walking around the castle aimlessly, she finally found her room. She sighed in exhaustion and her expression turned angry and she slammed her door. She has been here for at least a few months yet she can't find her way around Twilight's castle still.

She figured the best way to let out some steam for her is if she gotten some shut-eye. Maybe a good rest will calm her down. But that task was a lot harder than it sounded.

I'm throwing a fit over my stupid past. she said in her mind angrily. Makes me wonder more if I deserve to stay here if I pout and cry over everything.

After long minutes of battling herself in her mind, she decided to finally rest, and she closed her eyes bitterly, and slowly drifted off to sleep.


Starlight slowly opened her eyes and she was startled by the fluffy substance she felt on her hooves. She gasped when she saw that she was standing on a cloud. She wasn't even casting here cloud-standing spell. How was she standing here and not falling?

Oh, I'm dreaming. Starlight realized but she was surprised that she was actually dreaming, when all she intended was to shut her eyes to calm her feelings. Was I really that tired?

"I thought Sunburst and I were the same. But we turned out different, and it tore our friendship apart!" Starlight gasped when she heard the sound of her own voice. Caked with anger and sadness. She looked up and saw her standing on a cloud, with Twilight and Spike at the other side. She also saw the scroll that she used to time travel, inches away from being completely split open.

Why am I being reminded of this now? Now it was present Starlight's turn to be angry. Not even in her dreams can she escape the guilt that she had let herself attach too. And her dreams were usually her way of escape.

As she saw the scroll rip, Twilight immediately descended in the air.

"So try again! Make new friends!" she pleaded. "And if something that you can't control happens that changes things, work through it together! That's what friendship is!"

Present Starlight now saw her Starlight start to reconsider her actions.

"And it's not just my friendships that are important to Equestria! Everypony's are!" Twilight continued her speech. "When yours ended, it led us here. But just imagine all the others that are out there waiting for you if you just give them a chance!"

"How do I know they won't all end the same way?" Starlight asked her as tears started coming out of her eyes.

"I guess its up to you to make sure they don't." Twilight concluded as she landed on a cloud and extended her hoof to her, as an offering.

Present Starlight knew how this would turn out. After hesitation, she would accept her words and her offer to friendship, and while her mental state might never be fixed, at least the timeline will be safe-

"No."

Starlight felt a pang of alarm when she heard past Starlight deny her offer to friendship. She looked to see that her eyes were only filled with anger. "You're lying!"

"But Starlight, I'm not!" Twilight said to her in desperation.

It was finally present Starlight's turn to speak. "Listen to her, please!" she wailed. But it seemed like she was talking to deaf ears.

But it was too late. Past Starlight immediately tore the scroll.

"No!" Present Starlight screamed. This wasn't a dream. This was a full-on nightmare!

"What did you do?!" Spike screamed at her.

"If I can't have a friendship." Starlight said as she lifted herself off from the cloud. "Then no one can!"

"You're insane!" Twilight was about to speak more, but she slowly started fading away. "What is happening?!"

"If what you say is true, then the future shouldn't have another alicorn." Starlight stated. "And eventually, you and Spike will fade away."

"Ugh." The others heard Spike groan and saw that he was fading away too. "I don't feel good."

"Spike!" Twilight screamed. She immediately turned to Starlight. "What about you? Won't you fade away too? Huh?!"

But Starlight just simply shrugged. "I wouldn't care anyways."

And with that, she teleported away.

Past Starlight wanted to get out of this nightmare, very badly. But all she could do was watch, and stare at the aftermath. Twilight and Spike were hugging each other as they both faded away. Not a single trace of them was left behind.

"Twilight! Spike!" Starlight screamed for them. And when she extended her hoof, she saw that parts of it was completely gone.

I'm fading away?! she panicked.

Just then a white orb appeared from the sky. And before anything happened, her vision immediately turned black.


Starlight quickly woke up from her bed. She was panting deeply. And she put her hoof in front of her face. It was there as a whole.

It's not real. she told herself. It wasn't real. It was all fake, an illusion.

But what terrified her more was that it would've been real. And it would all happen if Starlight wanted to rip the scroll, which was so easy to do at the moment.

And worst of all, she would've easily killed Twilight and Spike, and maybe herself in the process.

I would've been a murderer. Of so many ponies. Starlight started shaking. If she wasn't completely drenched with guilt for her past actions, the guilt raised higher when she saw the process of what would've happened in the aftermath.

And... she caused the world to go haywire, and as she stated to herself before, would've ruined so many lives. And she was supposed to be roaming around happily in Twilight's castle?

Then I don't deserve happiness then. Starlight concluded. And it should've stayed like that in the first place.

Boiling

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If I can't have a friendship, then no one can!

If what you say is true, then the future shouldn't have another alicorn. And eventually, you and Spike will fade away.

The insane words lingered in Starlight's mind ever since that night, and it never went away. Since then, she had constant anxiety whenever she slept. Kept wondering if the horrifying nightmare will return. And she also wondered if nightmares about the outcomes of her evil schemes will also return. Probably equally, or more terrifying than the first.

Besides, I don't need sleep anyway. Starlight told herself, although she was really, really tired.

And Twilight started to notice that she started having bags under her eyes and her mane looked unkept as if Starlight had barely brushed it in a week. And according to Twilight, she would usually find her following asleep with a book in her face. And when she questioned her about it, she kept making up excuses for herself. But how long before she runs out? And she doubted that Twilight had believed these said excuses. She wasn't an idiot after all.

And she had no idea why she was keeping the truth from her. She was her friend now, her ally, and her teacher. She wanted to vent to Twilight so badly about her fears. But she didn't want to feel like a burden. First, she lets a mentally unstable pony into her castle, and now has to listen to her babble on and on about her fears?

It was best if she kept it inside. At least for now. The last thing she wanted was to wear down Twilight.

She decided to make herself useful and wash the dishes that were piled up in the sink. With her magic, she lifted the pile, and with a flash, all the dishes were clean and brand new.

"Starlight!" Starlight was immediately startled by Twilight's sudden arrival.

She quickly faced her. "Princess!" Starlight said, clearly surprised, before dropping the dishes by accident, causing them to shatter. The two immediately cast protective spells to shield themselves from the glass.

However, Starlight didn't do her spell in time, and a tiny glass cut her hoof, which left a tiny, bleeding mark.

Starlight stared at the broken dishes in horror. And she immediately bowed her head. "I'm sorry, Princess Twilight!" her voice quivered.

But instead of anger that she expected from her, she looked at her in pity. "Its nothing to worry about Starlight. The dishes can be easily repaired."

Twilight shot a magic beam at the dishes, and in the blink of an eye, they all turned back to the form they were before.

"However," Twilight looked at Starlight when she put the plates on a nearby table. "I, unfortunately, can't say the same for you. What has gotten into you lately?"

Starlight felt sweat marks start going down her face. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, I know that you have been acting a little frigid some time after you became my pupil, but ever since two weeks ago, you are now acting more paranoid and avoidable." Twilight explained before her expression softened. "Please, if there is anything that is going on in your mind, never be afraid to tell me."

Easier said than done. All what Starlight could do was turn her head away.

Twilight looked down at Starlight's cut. "Here, let me help you with that."

But she immediately pulled it away from her. "I can heal it myself!" she snapped at the Princess before immediately teleporting to her room.

Thanks a lot, idiot Starlight. she told herself hatefully. Now you just made a fool of yourself. Add that to the list of things that you really are. A foolish pony who can't even do one simple thing without freaking out.

But she can do at least one thing right. She put her hoof on her table, and she cast her horn on it. After a few moments, the cut healed and the blood had faded away.

Add magical to the list too. She said, trying her best to brighten herself up. But how could she?

All the brightness that was slowly starting to ignite in her immediately disappeared when she heard a knock on her door.

Please don't be Twilight, please don't be Twilight, please don't be Twilight. Starlight prayed in her mind.

But instead, she recognized the voice of Spike. "Hey, Starlight. Mind if I come in?"

Starlight didn't know whether she should teleport out of the castle to be left alone a while longer, or let the dragon come into her room. But she really needed someone to talk too. Someone that wasn't Twilight. And her feelings around Spike were not as bad as her feelings and trauma around Twilight.

"Sure, I guess." Starlight flatly called.

Spike opened the door, and was amazed by how messy her room was starting to get. By having some ripped papers lay on the floor, her bed was a little unkept, and some of her drawers were left open.

"Wow." Spike said after gazing at her room. "I didn't think that a well organized pony like you would leave a room like this." he said, with half amusement, and half concerned.

"I'm many things." Starlight retorted. "And 'organized' is not one of them. Or at least I realize that now."

Spike's smile quickly went away, and he touched her shoulder with his claw. "Why are you being so hard on yourself? You're very organized. Not as much as Twilight but you're up there."

"Why am I being hard in myself? Because I deserve it?" she answered him coldly.

"No you don't." Spike said firmly. "You're an amazing pony Starlight. You don't deserve all this torture that you're putting onto yourself."

"Amazing?" Starlight scoffed. "How can I be amazing when the only thing I did was rule an entire village under my evil rules, and almost destroyed the timeline, and almost killed you and Twilight?" she said the last part with her eyes now filled with tears.

"Starlight..." Spike was amazed by the last part too. "You didn't almost kill me and Twilight. Where did you get such a thought?"

Starlight wiped her tears from her eyes. "Why are you even here anyway?" she asked him, ignoring his question.

"Heard dishes crash, and Twilight told me to go check up on you, since she felt that you didn't want to talk to her at the moment."

"Well, she's smart for thinking that." Starlight rolled her eyes. She placed her chin on her desk, clearly exhausted. "And now, I don't feel like talking to you either."

"Starlight?" Spike's concern now started raising higher.

"Get out." Starlight ordered him.

"But Starlight-" Spike tried to address before being interrupted by Starlight once again.

"Get out!" Starlight raised her voice in an angry tone.

"But we barely talked. In fact, we never talk at all!" he protested. "Why are you pushing me away?"

But Starlight's anger continued to boil. Until she finally got out from her chair cast magic onto him, and forcefully taking him out of the room, and she slammed the door.

But now it turned out to be useless. Now she didn't even want to be in this room anymore. Or in this castle on general. If she wanted her feelings to get back to normal, or at least not make her anxiety go through the roof every five seconds, she needed to be free. Away from reminders. Away from what could've been.

"What's going on?" Starlight was alarmed by the sound of Twilight's voice.

She continued knocking on Starlight's door, more, and more. Until she had enough.

"Starlight, I'm respecting your privacy by knocking, but asserting my authority as your friend by coming in anyway." Twilight said before immediately slamming open the door.

No one was in the room. Except for one note.

Bye.

Darkness and Light

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Starlight shivered as the cold wind blew by her in the Everfree Forest, but the cold suited her. She didn't want to be in a place that's warm or comforting, or at least not be around other ponies. Especially Twilight.

If she wanted to be alone, she would rather be secluded in the Everfree Forest, the scariest forest around Ponyville. Or so that was what she heard from rumors. But Starlight never really understood why ponies say that. She had ventured into this forest before, and she was fine. Besides, she was very powerful; and if any creature came her way, she would not be defeated so easily.

She set her things down to a hidden spot and, with her magic, she flew herself upwards to one of the tree branches where she would see the stars underneath the green forest leaves. She didn't want to be too out in the open since there is a chance Twilight will immediately start looking for her here.

As she stared at the stars, she now started feeling regretful for leaving Spike and Twilight behind when all they were trying to do was to make her feel better. Was she being selfish and petty? After all, she barely did anything useful and when things didn't go her way, she gets easily mad and sensitive about it; and she now started thinking that she was barely trying to be a better pony. Maybe if she just got over her fears and actually commit, then maybe things wouldn't be so bad for her.

Unfortunately for her, it's not that easy.

Eventually, Starlight got bored at looking at the stars, and she was starting to get tired. While she would normally try her best to keep herself awake, she realized that she really needed to get some sleep.

She levitated down to her mossy leafy bed at tried to her best to get comfortable. While she preferred the soft, comfy mattress and her fluffy pillow at Twilight's castle, this was a good alternative.

Finally, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. Which was surprisingly easy to do.


Starlight slowly opened her eyes, and she immediately got to her hooves once she saw her surroundings. She was back in Ponyville, but the buildings were not colorful anymore. Just boring earth tones. And the area around her was pitch black. She looked at the skies. No stars were around.

"Hello?" Starlight called. But no one answered.

After standing and searching around, she saw the house doors slam open. But the ponies that came out immediately looked at her with wide smiles, and their manes were cut and short. All of these that Starlight forced her ponies to have when she ran her village.

Starlight felt her legs shake to the point where she can't move. And she lowered herself to the ground when the ponies walked towards her ominously.

"Welcome..." they all said while they grinned at her.

Starlight lowered her body to the ground, and she covered her eyes with her hooves while her teeth chattered in fear. But then she felt a hoof touch her arm. When she peeked her eyes, she was extremely shocked when she saw that Twilight and her friends were all in front of her, staring at her with the same creepy expressions.

"Join us, Starlight." Fluttershy said in her creepy voice.

"We all want you." Pinkie added.

Starlight quickly backed away; tears were now starting to form. "Get away from me!" she pleaded. But she stopped when she felt bodies behind her. She turned her head and was horrified by the sight of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, who also had the same mane cuts and smile.

"What's the rush?" Celestia asked her creepily.

"We only want your cutie mark." Luna agreed while smiling widely.

Starlight immediately broke away from the group while slowly walking away from them. But she noticed that another new figure appeared. One that Starlight recognized all too well.

"You." Starlight said to the figure with bitter anger in her voice. "Stay out of my thoughts and my dreams."

But her past self chuckled. "How can I if I'm you?"

"Not any longer." she said firmly.

"Actions speak louder than words." Her past self scoffed as she stepped aside. "Take a look around. This is what your future would've been. Everyone, even the princesses themselves, would bow before you. And you would've had an amazing life."

"How? This life is horrible!" Starlight looked aghast. Had her past self really had been this blind and stupid?

"Yeah, you'll get bored once in a while." Her past self somewhat agreed. "But nothing is boring about forcing ponies to be their followers." she smiled evilly.

She couldn't stay here any longer. Starlight, after taking a few step backs, she immediately ran away from herself and the group. But whenever she turned, they will immediately reappear while saying the same words.

"Join us!" They all said to her.

"Never!" Starlight screamed as she continued running through them. But then Past Starlight immediately came up behind her and tackled her to the ground.

"Let me go!" she ordered while she narrowed her eyes.

"You'll never get rid of me. I will always be part of you." Past Starlight grinned. "How long before you reach insanity? How long before you snap? And how long before you eventually harm your precious teacher?" she ended the last question with a laugh.

"You're useless, weak, and afraid." she now whispered in her ear, which Present Starlight tried lowering her ears, but that didn't help anything.

"And its about time to put you out of your misery." Past Starlight immediately glowed her horn before finally saying, "and you'll be an official part of the group!"

Starlight looked up in dismay. And she tried kicking her past self off, but her kicks evaporated through it. After short moments of fighting, she closed her eyes and accepted defeat, praying that she would wake up.

"Enough!" A voice commanded.

Starlight slowly opened her eyes. Her past self was gone. In fact, the ponies were gone, the town was gone; instead, it was replaced with millions of stars and it seemed that she was standing on space.

Confused by what was happening, Starlight regained her footing. Then she saw another mare walk up to her, covered in shadows.

"Who's there?" Starlight asked threateningly.

"I am not a foe. Only a friend." The mare said before finally revealing herself. Starlight gasped when she recognized the mare with a black coat, and her night-colored mane that waved midair.

Starlight squinted her eyes. "Princess Luna?"

She nodded.

"I don't understand." Starlight rubbed her head. "What did I do that made me worthy of being your presence?"

"I help anypony in need of nightmares." Luna simply answered. "Even you."

"Well, thanks for the kind offer, but you shouldn't have interrupted." Starlight sighed. "I deserved that dream."

Luna sighed. "The past can be troubling, I know."

"You do?" Starlight was surprised by her words.

"I've went through this exact torture that you are going through. I punished myself by dreaming of me transforming into Nightmare Moon every night." Luna explained. "But, thanks to six certain ponies, I've found my way out of that literal nightmare. And you could do the same."

"But how?" Starlight asked her. "Every time I do, my guilt keeps crawling back. And it haunts me every single day. I can't get rid of it no matter how hard I try."

Luna nodded in understanding. "The guilt that you have for your past mistakes may be with you for some time, and it may never go away. But, don't let that stop you from being a better pony, and don't let it stop you from your happier life."

Starlight sighed, while trying to take in her words. "But it's hard."

"It is. But be strong and brave, and good things will come your way." Luna advised her. "I bid you well, Starlight. And trust me, things will get better."

Starlight took in Luna's words as the princess flew away from Starlight and headed to the moon.

Be strong and brave. Starlight repeated her words in her head. How do I even start?

"HELP!"


The cry immediately jolted Starlight awake. She rubbed her eyes, and when she listened, she could hear the sound of trees thrashing, and a few roars in the distance.

"What the...?" Starlight muttered in confusion as she got up.

She trotted away from her things and carefully walked up to the source of the sound. After getting closer to the roars, Starlight ducked behind a bush and got a better look.

Then her ears lowered in shock when she saw the scene. She saw a pony, along with her friend, fight a bugbear with all of their might, but eventually, after a few slashes they received, they were both knocked down.

And the knocked down figures were Twilight and Spike, two of her friends that Starlight held so dear, now close to getting mauled by a bugbear.

Fighter

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No! Starlight screamed in her mind. She dreaded the sight of seeing Twilight and Spike exhausted from the fight. While normally she would expect Spike to be easily defeated, how can a bugbear easily defeat an alicorn like Twilight?

Starlight's teeth started chittering, her eyes started watering, and her legs were shaking once again. Twilight had to be fine. She had to be! She's an alicorn and that's a bugbear. She should surely be fine, right?

But when the bugbear got close, an exhausted Twilight used her a teleportation spell, but she teleported her and Spike not very far from where they were. Probably due to the exhaustion. Teleportation spells are not easy to do if you're tired and weak.

Starlight couldn't stand by and watch her friends potentially die. She had to save her two closest friends. But what if she was too late? What if she messes up the escape plan? And even worse, what if she and her friends gets killed in the process?

You're useless, weak, and afraid. Her words from her dream entered her mind as she shut her eyes tight, trying to think of what to do. There was no lie there. As of now, she is standing around doing nothing, shaking immensely, and she was incredibly afraid.

But she also remembered Luna's words too. Be strong and brave.

Be strong and brave. Starlight repeated those words numerous times in her head. She opened her eyes and gazed down at the scene. Twilight continued teleporting away, until finally the bugbear raced to her and slammed her and Spike against a tree, and they both knocked down to the ground.

At the sight of that, she snapped. Her legs stopped shaking, her teeth stopped chattering, she wiped the tears off her face, and took a deep breath. She gazed down with a determined look, she was done being scared. She was tired of running and being a coward, and she was definitely not going to sit by while her friends were in pain.

They went into the forest to find her, anyway. And she's just going to do nothing? Especially after all they went through? Not on her watch.

Be strong and brave. Starlight repeated with determination. If she was going to risk her own life, she will try her hardest to make sure that Twilight and Spike are safe and sound. No matter the cost.

She launched down from a tiny cliff, and she raced towards the scene. And once the bugbear got closer to them, Starlight cast a telekinesis spell on the bugbear and she tossed it aside, away from Twilight and her friends. And once the bugbear got up from the attack, Starlight stood her ground and defensively got in front of Twilight and Spike.

"Starlight!" Twilight and Spike both gasped at the same time.

"Hide." Starlight quickly ordered them, not taking her eyes off the bugbear. "I'll hold it off as much as I can until the two of you are safe."

"But, Starlight-"

"Now, Twilight!" Starlight raised her voice, interrupting her. "You've have done so much and put up with me these last few months. Now I'm going to return the favor whether you like it or not."

"Starlight..." Twilight was about to speak again, but once again, she was interrupted by the roar of the bugbear as it charged towards them.

Starlight immediately teleported Twilight and Spike to a few shrubs, away from the bugbear, and she levitated herself and dodged the bugbear's stinger attack by going over its body.

Once she got herself to the ground, she turned towards the bugbear with her eyes narrowed. Then the bugbear did the same.

The two enemies now started circling each other slowly, both staring at the other with hateful gazes. The bugbear let out a low growl, and while Starlight couldn't make any growling noises of her own, her own sign of intimidation is the bright glow of her horn.

As she slowly descended to the air with her magic, the fear and hesitation that she used to have just a few minutes ago had completely vanished. With determination and anger at the bugbear for hurting the ones she loved so dear as the replacement. And looked forward to a battle once more. And by the looks of the bugbear, it looked excited for a battle too; as if it was expecting to easily defeat a useless, weak, and a scared pony. Well, the bugbear would soon realize that they had messed with the wrong unicorn.

With a snarl, the bugbear flew up and immediately charged with its stinger, but once again, she swifly dodged it by flying. Once it missed, it tried to scratch Starlight with one of its claws, but missed that one too.

After the attack, Starlight shot a powerful beam at the bugbear's eye, but the bugbear dodged and it charged with its stinger once more, making Starlight teleport behind the bugbear and shot another beam at the back of its head, which made the bugbear cry in pain.

"Is that all you got?" Starlight taunted with a smirk. How was Twilight, an alicorn that was even to even with her in their last fight, get beaten so easily by a bugbear?

But she should've known by now not to underestimate her foes, since after the bugbear got attacked, it quickly turned and scratched Starlight on her cheek, leaving several scratch marks.

Starlight, who unprepared for the attack, collapsed onto the ground in pain.

"Starlight!" Twilight called out in the distance.

The bugbear immediately turned to that direction, and the bugbear snarled by the sight of them.

Noticing this, Starlight groaned as she had found her footing and she teleported in front of the creature. As she escaped its snapping jaws, she got its attention by flying upward, and with a roar, it followed her.

As she and the bugbear were high enough, she quickly battled it by shooting another beam at it. But this time, she shot it directly at its right eye. The bear roared as one claw covered its eye, while the rest kept swinging after her, to which Starlight easily missed them.

After rubbing its eye, it went back to the jaws attack, as everytime Starlight got close to it, it kept snapping at her direction. But thankfully, all it was doing was snap only the air. Meanwhile all Starlight could do was sneer.

After the crescendo of jaw attacks, it now started to pant, signaling that it was tired. Starlight quickly took advantage of this and she got its attention by waving at it. As she looked at the ground, and back at the bear, she decided to finish it off with one final trick.

After she got the bugbear's attention, and as it charged at her with rage, Starlight stopped levitating herself and plummeted down to the ground, with the bugbear now following her behind. And she couldn't help but smile. She never felt this alive in days. She felt so secluded and depressed, and shrouded with guilt that its as if she had forgotten the thrill of things lately.

Then once the time was right, she quickly teleported herself away from the bugbear minutes before she hit the ground. But the bugbear fell right for her trap, as once she teleported, it barely had time to react before it crash landed to the ground, making the bugbear unconscious for a while.

Once she thought the threat ceased, Starlight landed softly on the grass, panting. She rubbed her cheek, and winced at how painful the injury was. She looked and she saw blood stain her hoof.

"Starlight!" Twilight exclaimed as she raced over to her pupil.

"That was amazing!" Spike added as he followed Twilight. "I've never seen you that confident in a while!"

Starlight lightly chuckled. "I guess I was."

"Well, that was really brave of you." Twilight said. "You almost got killed."

"And so did you." Starlight said to her firmly. "How in the name of Equestra did you encounter that bugbear? And almost had your life expired?"

"We went inside a cave, looking for you. But the bugbear attacked Twilight in the dark, and it damaged her wing." Spike told her as he pointed his claw at her wing, which Starlight flinched by how badly injured it was.

"Oh." Starlight's ears drooped. "And you went through all this trouble... just to look for me." she said before sighing. "I'm sorry that I teleported away. I was just so caught up with anger that I wasn't thinking straight."

Twilight, instead of getting angry, she hugged Starlight instead. "All that matters is that you are better and safe now." she told her warmly.

"Yeah." Starlight smiled as she hugged her back. "Me too."

"You're finally smiling again." Spike told her. "Have you finally overcame your guilt?" he waved his tail in excitement.

Starlight sighed after she stopped hugging Twilight. "My guilt for my evil past would probably not go away for a long time. But, as I have learned from a wise princess, I needed to be strong and brave. And not let my fears take hold of my day." she said as she smiled sheepishly.

"And definitely don't make us go through dangerous things." Twilight joked as she winked.

And the three of them laughed.

The True Aftermath

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Starlight woke up in her bed and yawned. And she couldn't help but already smile. It felt good to get on a good sleep schedule again, and it finally felt good to not dream about how things would have been if her evil plans had worked out. She was glad she was finally living a normal life with her two friends.

But not all things needed to stay the same. Even though she was not completely discouraged by guilt anymore, her old manecut reminded her too much of her past. And plus, it looked a little too unfriendly in her opinion.

With a sigh, and with an idea in mind, she grabbed a hairbrush and she started brushing her bangs to one side, while keeping the back of her mane the same. She didn't want to completely change her look after all.

Since the bang would not stick naturally, Starlight cast a tiny spell on her bang, so it didn't revert back to her old manecut.

She looked in the mirror with her brand new look. She was happy with how she looked like now. Would she miss her old hangs that she had in most of her life? Maybe. But she would probably get used to her bang very quickly.

Once she was content, she headed to the kitchen to get some pancakes for breakfast. And the moment she got there, she was immediately noticed by Spike.

"Nice new manecut!" he complemented her with a smile.

"Thank you, Spike." she responded with a smile too.

"I agree. You look like a brand new pony." Twilight said as she entered the room. "And it fits. New life, new style, and new mane."

Starlight got to thinking. "Actually, it does fit."

"Well, once you're done with your food, we can get started on your first friendship lesson." Twilight told Starlight. "Come into the main library once you are finished. I am looking forward to discussing this with you." she told her before she walked off from the room.

"Oh wow. My first friendship lesson." Starlight repeated what she just heard. "That sounds like a lot of fun. Or maybe it will be a bore fest." she joked.

"At least you're happy about it." Spike told her as he continued eating. "And I'm happy that you're excited about your first friendship lesson. I just simply can't wait for what the future lies ahead for you."

"Yeah." Starlight said, then she paused. What if the lesson was more challenging than I thought? Or what if the lesson just doesn't sit right with me? What if...

She quickly stopped herself from having these thoughts. As she had learned by now, whatever doubts she has had in her mind, she had to eventually trust that things would be ok in the end.

"Me too, Spike." Starlight said, responding to his question again from earlier. Then she slowly showed a warm smile. "Me too."