Don't get your hopes up
“Hey Pipp?”
“One second!,” Pipp replied. “Sorry about that Pippsqueaks, but it looks like I have to get going. Until next time, Pip-pip hooray!”
Pipp sang her outro with her usual gusto before turning her phone off. She tucked under her wing with a sigh before making her way across her bedroom. Pipp opened the door to find her sister on the other side, looking mildly excited.
“Hey sis, what’s up?”
"Nothing much," Zipp said with a smirk.
“Oh, now?”
“Bad time?”
“Well… not really I guess,” Pipp said with a weak smile as she rubbed her knee. “I guess that stream was getting a little long, anyways.”
“Eh. You know, maybe one of these days you could have your fans watch us. Bet they’d get a kick out of that.”
“Zipp! D-don’t joke about that!”
Zipp chuckled as her sister scowled. “Oh come on, I was only kidding.”
“It’s not funny!,” Pipp retorted. “Do you know what would happen if they found out? We’d be ruined! Neither of us could ever show our faces in this city again! And after I have been working my tail off to fix the damage a certain somepony caused when she decided to crash my concert!”
Zipp flinched, her ears flatting as she suddenly became interested in the tiling on the floor. Pipp sighed. “I'm sorry. That… that was uncalled for.”
“It’s cool. It was a bad joke anyways,” Zipp muttered, her gaze still downward. She suddenly felt Pipp’s wing drape over her shoulder, pulling her into a hug.
“Come on, you know I hate it when we fight. And besides…” Zipp lifted her head as she patted her on the back. She couldn’t help but to match Pipp’s smile with one of her own.
“Live streaming really builds up an appetite, you know.”
Cloudpuff was sitting on Queen Haven’s throne, taking a well earned nap after a long day of flying after birds. Besides him were two members of the royal guard, Zephyr’s Heights elite bravest, most disciplined, and loyal citizens, sworn by oath to fight to the very last breath to protect the family.
“Hey, Zoom! You gotta see what these ponies just did on Clip Clop!”
Thunder thrust his phone into his companion's face, shattering her stoic demeanor instantly. Zoom chose not to dignify his antics with words, instead opting for an annoyed grunt and an eye roll. Just then the throne room’s doors opened, causing the stallion awkwardly stash his phone and snap into a salute. Pipp Petals trotted into the room with an unusual spring in her step as her sister followed close behind. Cloudpuff woke from his nap and flew across the room. Pipp leaped into the air and grabbed him in a hug.
“Hey there little guy, did you miss me?,” she said, scratching him behind the ears as he licked her face. Zipp chuckled, then turned to address the guards:
“Evening Thunder, Zoom. Just letting you that the two of us are going to be using the private room again. You know the drill.”
The two nodded in understanding. In the meantime Pipp had landed back on the ground, trying to set Cloudpuff down only for him to fly up into her face, letting out a pleading whimper.
“Aww,” Pipp cooed. “He doesn’t want us to go.”
“Well, I guess we could bring him along,” Zipp suggested.
“Wait, really?”
“Don’t see why not. Maybe he’d even like getting in on the action.”
“Zipp!,” Pipp shouted, her face changing from pink to red as she pouted. “Do you have to word it like that!?”
“Yes.”
Pipp rolled her eyes and playfully punched her in the shoulder. “You're insufferable, you know that?”
“And you wouldn’t have me any other way.”
The sister’s laughter echoed as they stepped into the hall behind their thrones only to abruptly be silenced by the sound of the door closing behind them.
Some time later, and after being forced to watch more Clip Clop challenges than Zoom would have ever wanted to see, the door opened again, revealing two very tired yet satisfied pegasi. Cloudpuff stumbled out behind them, immediately rushing into his seat and uncerimounsly falling asleep.
“Ugh! I feel so… full. I have no idea how you could even walk after all that.”
Zipp smiled. “Guess all that flight practice is finally paying off.” Whatever she was about to say next was interrupted by a loud yawn. “Okay. Guess I’m more tired than I fought. Think I’m gonna go to my room and chill for a bit.”
“That’s fine,” Pipp with a groan as she stretched her neck. “I think I’m all tuckered out for the evening anyways.”
Zoom watched as the two left, chewing on her bottom lip in thought. “Hey thunder,” she said after a moment. Thunder already was staring at his phone when he heard her.
“Yeah?”
“You ever wonder what they are doing back there?”
Thunder’s gaze shifted from his phone to the other guard pony. He frowned. “What'd ya mean?”
“I mean they’ve been going back there about every other day for the past month or so, they never say what they’re doing beyond ‘having some alone time,’ they’re always weirdly excited when they go in and they leave looking happy. You aren’t a little curious about what they’re up to?”
“Uh, never thought of it that way. I guess I haven’t been paying too much attention to them.”
Figures, Zoom mumbled under her breath.
“Eh, they're probably just working on that weird friendship magic thing they keep talking about. It’s probably no big deal.”
“Hmm. Yeah. You’re probably right.”
“Hey Zoom, you gonna wa-”
Thunder cut himself off mid sentence as he remembered that his partner had taken the day off.
“Oh, right. I guess that means that I’m just talking to myself here, heh.”
Once again there was no response. Thunder sighed and continued scrolling through his phone. He realized that he had already seen the video he was watching at least twice before and turned his phone off. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to try and focus on guard duty, he thought. Zoom was always getting on his case about how he needed to pay more attention to things anyways.
Thunder smacked his lips together, the quiet noise just barely managing to break the silence. He managed to stay still for another moment or so before he began to fidget with his hooves. Eventually he let out an annoyed groan.
Oh my gosh, this is SO frickin’ boring, he thought to himself. Thunder then remembered the hallway behind him, where the royal sisters keep their ‘private room.’ He thought back to the conversation he had with Zoom last week. Sure, the royals had always demanded to have at least some privacy, and Thunder could understand why they would want a place to hide from the public eye. But hadn’t they promised more government transparency after the coup? Did private rooms count?
Thunder supposed he could do a quick check on them. Just poke his head in for a bit, ask if they're alright. He was sure they wouldn't mind.
The door to the hallway was protected by a password lock. Thunder frowned as he stared at the keypad in confusion. Then he entered in the Queen’s birthday and it opened with a soft click. Thunder stepped into the hallway, thinking back to the time Zoom complained to the Queen about how unsafe it was to use the same password for everything. Of course, since she had one of her photo shoots later that evening Queen Haven had simply brushed her off.
Thunder froze midstep staring at the door at the end of the hall for a moment. Should he be doing this? Was it right to intrude on the princesses just because he was bored?
Thunder’s train of thought was interrupted by a giggle coming from behind the door. Clearly the sisters where fine, have fun with wh-
Was that moaning?
Curiosity overtook Thunder. As he slowly crept towards the door he noticed it was slightly ajar.
“C’mon Zipp, you have to let me try for once!”
What.
“I don’t know about that, Lil’ Pip. Don’t see how a little thing like you could even fit it all in your mouth.”
The.
“Hey, I’m not little! And you of all ponies should know I could swallow it all one gulp.”
Fudge.
Thunder was now standing directly behind the door, now too engaged with the conversation on the other side to care about whether or not spying on them would be tactful. Unfortunately, the change in air pressure due to his approach caused the door to swing open.
Inside was a tiny room about the size of a garden shed. Inside was an old and tattered loveseat, in which sat two startled sisters who seemed to be in the middle of…
“Oh my stars,” Thunder said. “I… I… you two… I…”
“Look, everypony just calm down. Let’s not make this a bigger deal than it is…”
“No big deal!? Oh, this is terrible! My-my Pibsqueaks! They're gonna think we’re freaks”
“Oh for the love of Pete, Pipp! It’s not a big deal. Mom even tried last week and said it wasn’t too bad!”
“Easy for you to say! You don’t even have a Ponytube account! He’s gonna talk and they’re gonna wanna lock us up!”
“Like I keep saying, society has evolved past that now! I’m sure if you just explained why you like…”
“I CAN NEVER SHOW MY FACE ANYWHERE EVER AGAIN! Unless… unless we have him locked away in the dungeons before he could talk…”
“PIPP!”
“...is ...is that pineapple on your pizza?,” Thunder stammered, pointing a hoof at the dish sitting on the coffee table near the loveseat.
“OH WHAT’S THE USE! I’M A FREAK! A FREAAAAAAAK!” Pipp curled up into a ball, rocking back and forth as she sobbed.
“Hey come now, you’re not a freak,” Zipp said as she draped her wing over her sister. “You just like to eat weird foods, that’s all.”
Thunder blinked, unsure of what to say. Zipp turned to face him and sighed.
“After we met Izzy she had us try all these unicorn recipes. One of them was pineapple pizza, and ever since then we were hooked. Pipp was too worried everypony would think that she’s weird for liking it, so we paid a chef in Bridlewood to mail us pizzas twice a week.”
“But… I mean, of all the things you could put on a pizza, why fruit?”
“You mean like tomatoes?,” Zipp deadpanned.
“Those are fruits?”
“Never mind. The point is that Pipp shouldn’t be afraid of what ponies think about her eating habits.”
“I know I shouldn’t care, but I just… I can’t…”
“Well, I guess it’s not the weirdest thing ever put on a pizza…” Thunder thought out loud.
“See? He doesn’t think it’s that weird," Zipp said.
Pipp sniffled and wiped her nose with a hoof. “Y-you’re right,” she said eventually. Slowly she climbed off the loveseat and onto her hooves. She turned to face Thunder, a look of shame upon her face.
“I-I’m sorry about wanting to lock you in the dungeon… “
“Pffft,” Thunder said as he waved his hoof dismissively in the air. “It’s no big deal. Your mother always wanted to have us thrown in the dungeon for one reason or another.” At least until we threw her in the dungeon, he thought.
"So, we're good?"
"Yeah, we're good."
Pipp smiled. “You know,” Zipp said. “This could make an interesting video for your Pibsqueaks.”
“Oh my gosh, you’re right!,” Pipp said as she clapped her hooves, beaming with excitement. Suddenly she gasped. “We could do a mukbang!”
With that she leaped into the air and with surprising speed flew past Thunder, likely heading to her recording studio.
“She want’s to do a what now?”
“Eh, I'll tell you some other time.”