Cooking Gone Wrong
The camera goes on-and-off; muttering is heard on the side as a figure tries to adjust it. Eventually, the frame angles before a blank wall with a desk in front. A familiar young lady with the biggest hairdo makes herself known, as she smiles before the camera.
“Hello everyone! Pleasure to meet me!” the girl introduces herself. “It’s your favorite Dazzling, Adagio Dazzle! Now lately, I’ve been hearing some nasty rumors that I can’t cook. Well, the joke’s on you! Because today, I’m live today to clear that up. Not only am I an expert when it comes to baking… I also make the best meals in all of Canterlot City!
“As a matter of fact, I’m such an expert I practically prepared a five-star meal all by myself! But… cooking alone wouldn’t be any fun, now would it? So today, I brought along a rather… ‘special’ guest for this very occasion!”
“HELLLOOOOO everybody!” Sonata comes in, waving at the camera. “Hello! Am I on the internet, Adagio!?”
A sigh escapes Adagio’s lips, her fingers tap on the desk impatiently. Still, she attempts to retain a straight face as she turns back to the camera.
“I originally invited Aria Blaze to be my special guest, but she cancelled…”
“I didn’t cancel, I said I wanted no part of this!” Aria shouts offscreen.
“Ahem… as I was saying, Aria cancelled…” Adagio mumbles. “Something about not wanting to be on camera… ah well, saves me the trouble to be honest.”
“I heard it’s because she’s on her period!” Sonata yells happily.
“I HEARD THAT!!!”
“S-Sorry…” Sonata apologizes, bending her finger sheepishly.
“Good grief…” Adagio mumbles. “Alright Sonata, let’s just… get this started.”
“Oh, of course Dagi!” Sonata smiles. “Hiya folks, Sonata Dusk here! And we’re about to start off by cooking… a turkey!”
“That’s correct, Sonata! And the first step to preparing turkey is to…?”
“Tell the audience how good the turkey will be?!” Sonata asks.
“No, you idiot!” Adagio mutters. “You see folks, the first thing you do is preheat the oven to approximately 325 degrees Fahrenheit.”
“Um… what’s a fair-an-height?” Sonata asks, confused.
“It’s Fah-ren-heit! That’s the oven. All you’ve got to do is press the buttons until the number says 325 degrees.”
“Oh… got ya!” Sonata salutes.
“I’m starting to regret this…” Adagio rambled. “Alright folks! While we get the oven ready, it’s time we bring out the pot…”
Adagio approaches the kitchen cabinets, opens the doors, and carefully takes out a big pot before setting it on the table.
“Next, we take out all of our ingredients, which we already prepped ahead of time…”
Adagio then returns to the kitchen where a basket of ingredients sits pre-set for the live stream. She then proceeds to take the basket and positions it next to the pot.
“Soon we will get ready to start cutting… the vegetables into pieces… Sonata, turn the oven on! Christ, do I have to do everything around here…?”
Taking a knife, she starts cutting a various assortment of the ingredients into pieces.
“And now we put the veggies at the bottom of the pot,” Adagio instructs. “After which, we prepare the seasoning! Sonata, pass the cumin!”
“You mean the kind you get when—”
“NOT that kind!” Adagio quickly interrupts.
“Oh…” Sonata replies, handing out the seasoning. “Here you go!”
“This girl is going to be the end of me…”
Adagio quickly grabs the seasoning, taking a look at the label.
“This is cinnamon, not cumin! We’re not making something sweet!”
“S-sorry!” Sonata calls out, showing the cumin. “Here it is!”
“Thank you…” Adagio grumbled, turning toward the camera. “Sorry about that folks. Now, we just sprinkle a little of this onto the turkey. Now you know what comes next?”
“We put it in the oven!”
“That’s right, Sonata! And for getting the answer right, you get to do the honors!”
Adagio pushes a button, activating the cheering crowd noise and the fireworks effect on the screen. Sonata starts bursting into tears, holding the pot containing the turkey like an Emmy award. To keep her hands from burning, she wears some pink oven mitts for additional protection.
“Thank you!” Sonata cries happily. “You love me… you really love me! Don’t worry Dagi, I won’t let you down!”
Carrying the pot ever so carefully, Sonata slips the turkey into the hot-n-ready oven.
“So far so good!” Adagio nods.
“Told you I wouldn’t let you down!” Sonata smiles.
“And now…!” Adagio pauses for dramatic effect.
“… And now what?”
“We play… the waiting game,” Adagio says plainly.
“… That’s all?” Sonata asks, disappointed.
“Yeah…? You can’t exactly speed the cooking process.”
“Really?”
“Yes… really.”
Sonata pouts, while Adagio merely looks away. Seconds turn into minutes, a few steps away from eternity. Every now and then, Sonata turns to look at the clock, yet the hands look as if they aren’t even moving. She taps her fingers on the counter, dying for something… anything to happen. Suffice to say, Adagio was pretty bored herself… even though she tries not to show it.
“THIS IS BORING!” Sonata whines.
“What do you want me to do about it?!” Adagio yells out. “We can’t exactly accelerate time!”
“We could watch a movie!”
“Our DVD player broke… and even if that wasn't the case, we don't have a TV, remember?"
“Oh… what about some web videos?”
“… Yeah, we could do that.”
“Yay!” Sonata squeals happily. “Silly videos always make things better!”
Sonata pulls out her phone from her skirt pocket, tapping a few buttons to a website where tons of random videos are posted every day. Reluctantly, but only because there’s nothing else to pass the time, Adagio leans in and watches a few videos with Sonata. A brief moment where the two actually start to bond… for about thirty minutes.
“I better check on that turkey,” Adagio suggests. “It should be done by now.”
“Alrighty then!” Sonata answers.
Adagio works her way toward the stove, to check the progress on the turkey.
“Let’s see how it’s turning—WHAT THE HELL?!”
Before her very eyes, or at least through her ‘GoPro’ camera, the whole oven is on fire, spewing flames like a dragon.
“Sonata, get your ass in here now!”
On camera, Sonata rushes in and spots Adagio by the flaming oven.
“I came as fast as I cou—OH MY GOD!!!”
“Quick! Get the fire extinguisher!”
“You have a fire extinguisher in here—”
“SHUT UP AND GET IT!!!”
“Okay, okay! I’m going already!”
Sonata leans toward the bottom shelf, pulling out the fire extinguisher. She aims carefully at the fire… and hurls it, full force, directly into the burning oven. The fire extinguisher explodes upon impact, knocking the two Dazzlings backward (and miraculously unhurt).
“Sonata, you dummy!” Adagio yells angrily. “You’re supposed to spray it, not throw it!”
“Sorry!” Sonata cries. “I just got lost in the moment!”
“Crap! Crap, crap, crap, crap! What do we do? What do we do?! What are we going to do?!”
“I don’t want to die this way!” Sonata cries. “I haven’t even gotten to try every kind of taco!”
“Just shut up and help me put this fire out!” Adagio screams.
But there is nothing more the girls can do. With all the sparks flying everywhere, barely missing the girls, the two Dazzlings could barely approach even an inch. The whole kitchen soon goes up in flames, so great that the view count on the recording starts exploding, too. Walking onto the scene, dressed in mostly a bathrobe, bags under her eyes, and her hair in a mess, Aria turns from a corner and her eyes widen in shock.
“You girls just set the kitchen on fire?!” Aria asks, in shock.
“We got to get out of here!” Adagio yells.
“How the hell did all this happen?!” Sonata cries out.
“We put you in the kitchen, that’s how!” Aria yells.
Without further argument, the three women make their way out of the house, dropping the cameras on the floor. The flames start surrounding the electronic devices before they completely black out.
<>
By the time Adagio had called the fire department, fortunate to still have a cellphone on her person, their entire house had all but burst into ash. The members of the fire department doused the flames, but it wasn’t like there was much they could save. All the girls could do was watch as the house collapsed on the ground from a safe distance.
“Well, that went well…” Aria mumbled.
“Really?” Sonata asked.
“Of course not, you idiot! You burned the freaking house down!”
“Oh…”
Silence fell between the three girls; Adagio hadn't said a word ever since they got out of the house. She had merely been looking at the phone, reviewing the video from their recorded live stream. Mostly at all the comments… most of them not very pleasant.
“You know… I think I just realized the problem,” Sonata spoke, breaking the silence.
“No… you think?!” Adagio asked sarcastically.
“I may have had the oven slightly over 400 degrees…” Sonata admitted sheepishly.
“You what?!” Aria and Adagio yelled, in unison.
“How could you possibly screw that up?!” Adagio yelled rhetorically.
“I just thought if I set it a little higher, the turkey would be cooked faster!” Sonata explained.
*SLAP!*
“OW!” Sonata cried, rubbing the back of her head.
Aria massaged her right hand. All things considered, she was lucky that was the only thing she did.
“Now what are we supposed to do?!” Adagio asked.
One of the firefighters, partly black from dousing the flames, approached the three girls.
“Sorry about your loss, ladies,” he apologized. “But we do have a few questions for you to answer. An officer from the C.C.P.D. will be speaking with each of you momentarily.”
Sure enough, a police officer arrived on the scene before the girls. Slightly thin, with a goatee and mustache. At least a foot taller than the girls, not including the cap, to which he removed, revealing he had a very short haircut as if he would’ve been in the military.
“Good evening ladies,” the officer greeted.
“Anon?!” the three asked, in unison.
“Is that you?” Sonata questioned.
“That’s ‘Officer’ Anon, if you don’t mind,” the officer corrected, placing his hat back on. “Here I was, investigating a report about some noise complaint in the neighborhood, and then I get the call saying there’s been a fire within this same neighborhood. You girls realize the violations and safety hazards you caused?”
“It depends on how much you’ve already seen,” Aria replied, turning towards Adagio.
“Mm-hmm… why don’t we start from the top?” the cop suggested, taking out a notebook.
The three girls looked at each other, wondering what they should do or how to approach. But given they’d already caused enough trouble, their actions plain to see for the entire web, and they didn’t exactly have a home to go back to, their options were very slim. Adagio sighed, shaking her head over the stupidity of her sisters, before turning back toward the officer.
“Here it goes…”