Hi-Rez is a photographer who just wants to get home, but ends up taking a trip that he didn't inten
Hi-Rez, or Rez as his friends call him, is a photographer pony, following in the footsteps of his deceased father. Unlike his father, however, Rez is an inventor of magic. He has invented several useful spells for ponies of all kinds, and intends to make more. He has grown up blind and has managed to find a way to cope, but being blind soon takes its toll.
Sure, you can get around your own house blind, and maybe even around your own town when you're blind, but wander too far and you soon lose sight of where you need to be, so when Rez finds himself on unfamiliar turf, will he be able to find his way home again?
(All category tags are used lightly and may not be present throughout the entire story. Unlisted categories may be present.)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, this is just the prologue, so it's going to generally tell a background behind Hi-Rez and what's led him to be what he is today.
It's going to get a lot better in chapter 1. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi-Rez was born into a family of photographers on October 7th, 1994. Even at birth, his parents could tell something was wrong. Their child had been born with peculiar eyes, which made them think that he could have had some sort of disability.
It's too bad they didn't realize how right they were.
Growing up, Hi-Rez had a problem. He was blind, which made life a lot harder. He couldn’t see what everypony else could see, so he was often forced to ask what things like a ‘tree’ or the color ‘blue’ or other things were. It didn't help that he was born into a family of photographers, who relied on their eyes for adjusting photos and drawings.
His parents, Snap Shot and Quick Shot, had done their best to pass down their talents to their blind son, and at times it seemed futile, but Hi-Rez slowly learned. He learned how to use a camera, and that made his parents very proud. He eventually started into the photography business like his parents, but a mishap involving a broken light bulb caused their home to be burned down. The company they ordered the bulb from sent them a refund, but it didn’t really help at the time.
The family bought a house closer to the center of town, and had it specially constructed so their blind son could navigate easier. Special floor tiles were placed around the house, each having a different surface from another so Hi-Rez could feel his way around the house without getting lost, like he used to. It was shortly after this that Hi-Rez took an interest in magic.
Shortly after the construction finished, a support beam fell on his father, crushing him to death. The medical response arrived five minutes too late, and his father had bled out.
Hi-Rez was only five at the time, so he couldn't completely comprehend what was occurring. His mother told him that his father needed to leave for a long time, but she never implied that he would return. This explanation was sufficient to keep Hi-Rez calm for a few years, before the evidence finally came back to bite.
Hi-Rez had been strolling through the cemetery at age 9, not too far from his mother at the time, and was feeling gravestones. He had a bundle of flowers wrapped up in his tail, and was feeling around to see if he could find the name of a passed friend of his mother, but instead, his hoof came across a name that was too familiar to him.
HERE LIES SNAP SHOT PHOTOGRAPHER FATHER OF ONE MAY HE BE REMEMBERED ALWAYS
Hi-Rez didn't stop crying for days, and his mother didn’t know how to comfort him, but she tried her best.
Hi-Rez’s first hospital visit was after a failed magical experiment. Whatever he was trying to cast blew up in his face, literally, giving him a concussion. He was rushed to the hospital where they discovered no damage, but they did find something peculiar. After the incident, magical energy seemed to flow through him like a catalyst. It would even show in gleaming ‘veins’ in his hair, which would sparkle like the sunrise. These developments weren’t particularly harmful, but others around him sometimes made fun of him for it.
Hi-Rez, at age 10, had devoted a lot of his time to his family's business, as he tried to live up to his father's name and keep their business alive. He also started to put more and more time into the studies of magic, and at the age of 11, he invented his own magic.
He invented a spell that could latch onto an object from a distance away, and teleport it to the user. News of this spell and evidence thereof quickly spread through the town, and a news reporter had even written an entire paper on it. Hi-Rez wasn't sure why everyone was so excited over his spell, when all he used it for was to recall his camera.
He quickly became known for the spell, but the fame only lasted a week as other magic inventors quickly began drawing the attention away from the original spell by inventing new and improved versions. Hi-Rez didn’t really care, so he just continued on with his life.
He later became popular again, but only in minute amounts, with a fan here and an inspired inventor there, nothing big. A sudden surge of popularity did come later, however, when he invented a new spell to help keep his balance in case he tripped on anything, which he did a lot of on account of being blind.
By the age of 15, his mother had gotten a new job, but Hi-Rez was still in the photography business. He did his best to uphold the family reputation, but things fell out of hand before too long, so he hired an assistant. His assistant was named Lens Cap, and she sure had a tendency to ruin photos, but she learned over time.
As time went on, Lens Cap and Hi-Rez Shot became good friends, and usually did a lot of things together. Lens helped Rez around the town a lot, since Rez was still blind.
Shortly after Lens and Rez became great friends, Rez invented a sort of ‘walking-stick’ spell, which allowed him to use the telekinesis spell as a pole, letting him detect when there is something in front of him so he doesn’t just walk directly into it. It doesn’t always work, but it stops him from running into too many ponies throughout the day.
Now, at age 17, Lens Cap has needed to move away with her family, leaving Rez without a friend to guide him. He has grown proficient with magic and has invented at least two other spells. He sets out into the town to make friends and snap some shots of ponies, but he’s mostly looking for someone to help him around. What he ends up finding is not something to be found, but instead, is something he loses.
Hi-Rez stood at the train station, eyeing one train in particular as he stood on the boarding platform. His green eyes weren’t looking at anything, but instead, just staring straight ahead with a blank look. He spoke aloud, “So, Lens, this is it, huh?”
Hi-Rez, or Rez as his friends called him, was two-thirds of a hoof taller than most ponies, and his unusual eyes made him stand out further. He didn’t seem to have pupils, but instead, almost seemed to have a continuation of his irises, which was very unusual. His average unicorn horn stood out of his brown mane, which had peculiar yellow stripes running through them, almost resembling veins. They shone like the morning sun, and almost seemed to emit magic energy. His dark yellow body and pointed ear added to his unusual appearance, but that was not the end of the strangeness of his look. He wore an orange, striped vest with a large turned-down collar and a single vest pocket, where a roll of film jutted out. His orange hooves added to the curiousness of his image, with his tail looking as strange as his mane.
The one thing that REALLY stood out, however, was the thing he did not have.
His cutie mark.
Being a photographer and being blind at the same time wasn’t easy, so he was sure he would have gotten his mark simply by being able to make manageable photos without his eyes.
Yeah, you heard me. Hi-Rez, the photographer, is blind.
He’d been blind ever since he was birthed, which the doctors attributed to an infected gene. With the help of his Mother and Father, and a bit of whimsical magic invention, he manages to get along just fine. He also owes a huge portion of his navigation skills to Lens Cap, who was his assistant in his business. He and Lens Cap had grown quite fond of each other, and became great friends while working in the same line of business.
Unfortunately for him, Lens Cap was moving away today.
“Yeah, I guess so,” came her response. Lens Cap was average pony height, with plain blue eyes and a dark gray-blue coat. Her mane was a ruffled and messy teal, as was her tail. The only other defining characteristics about her were her cutie mark and her bodily structure. As far as a cutie mark went, it was a normal camera with a lens cap over the lens, which matched her name, and ability to mess up pictures in the most peculiar of ways. Her bodily structure, however, was very refined, unlike her personality. Personality aside, though, Lens Cap was very slim and slender, which drew the eyes of a lot of colts and stallions. It couldn’t draw the eyes of Hi-Rez though, seeing as he was blind.
“I’m gonna miss you.” she said unwittingly, quickly putting a hoof over her mouth as though trying to undo what she had just said.
Hi-Rez looked onward; the same vacant stare in his eyes. A short look of sadness swept over his face as he said, “Yeah, I’ll miss you too. You were a great business partner, and I’m sure we’ll meet again.” He casually turned his head to the right to face her, simply out of habit and respect, but ended up looking too high.
“A little further down.” Lens Cap corrected out of habit. Hi-Rez looked down and, although he was staring at her neck now, she felt a little more comforted by him at least looking at her. “Just as handsome as ever…” she said quietly, and then realizing what she had said, she immediately covered her mouth again.
“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.” Hi-Rez asked, a look of confusion coming across his face. In all honesty, Hi-Rez knew exactly what she said, but he just wanted to be sure she didn’t say it by accident. He hoped she didn't say it by accident. “Nothing!” she quickly blurted, before gently adding, “Nothing at all.” Hi-Rez let out a small sigh. Okay, so that WAS by accident, he thought sadly to himself.
The train’s whistle blew as a pony announced, “All aboard! All aboard!”
Hi-Rez went back to an appearance of sadness, in which Lens followed suit. “I’ll see you again, some day.” Lens Cap said, gently putting a hoof to Hi-Rez’s cheek.
Hi-Rez stuck out a hoof to do the same, but missed entirely. He fumbled around in the air for a moment before his hoof connected with her back, which he gently patted. “Have a fun time, and don’t forget about me!” he said with a grin, then taking his hoof off her back.
“You too. Goodbye, Rez.” Lens said, a hint of longing in her voice. She turned to leave, but quickly turned back, pecked Rez on the cheek, and then boarded the train in a hurry.
Hi-Rez just stood there, his face redder than Big Macintosh as the train took off.
A massive grin spread across his face for a moment, but it quickly disappeared and was replaced with a frown. Well, I guess I won’t be seeing her for awhile… better find my way home, he thought to himself, before his horn began to glow. A small rod of magical energy appeared in front of him, and it began prodding at the ground in front of him. By extension, Hi-Rez could feel was the rod was poking, so he could tell if he was going to run into something. He turned to leave, and started to make his way home. He had a general idea of the layout of ponyville, but he occasionally stopped to audibly ask where he was, asking for directions to where he was headed next. This was not the case this time, however, as he knew his way from the train station to his house.
He knew he was approaching his house when he heard the noises his neighbor mowing his lawn. His neighbor was the only pony in ponyville who cared for his lawn every single day, probably because his neighbor’s special talent was plant care. Hi-Rez found his way inside, and let his magic walking stick dissipated. He was met with a friendly greeting from his Mom, to which he responded “Hi, Mom. Lens Cap left today, so now I’m out a business partner… and a friend.” a bereaved look came over his face, to which his Mom responded by embracing him in a warm hug. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Hi-Rez. It’ll be alright; you can find a new partner and make new friends.” These reassuring words helped to put Rez back in a happy mood, which was apparent as a smile spread across his face. He brought up his own hooves to return the hug, his silence being all the response his Mom needed.
He squeezed out of the hug and started to feel the floor, searching for the surface that would take him to the restroom. After finding it, he quickly went inside to freshen up and relieve himself, seeing as he had waited a long time at the train depot.
After washing up and taking a short shower, he nearly slipped and fell on the wet floor, but managed to steady himself before tripping. He re-styled his mane and, when he thought it looked good enough, even though he couldn’t tell, he got his vest back on and found his way to his bedroom.
He used a spell he had invented, a recall spell, which teleported his camera to him from his headboard. He enveloped it in a green aura, and then found his way back to the door. “I’m heading out Mom! Gonna go take some pictures.” His Mom replied with a simple, “Stay safe and have fun!” as he departed.
Hi-Rez walked through the streets, then set up a small stand at what he figured to be the center of town. A sign on the front of the stand said: PHOTOS: 1 BIT.
Hi-Rez stood happily at the stand, with a small background hanging over two stands, with a stool for ponies to sit on in front of it. He casually sat on a stool of his own in front of the stand, with his camera set up on a tripod next to him. There didn’t seem to be a lot of customers that day, but every now and again a pony would walk up and request a picture, usually with another pony.
Without any argument, Hi-Rez happily picked up his camera, used his magic walking stick to position himself on a stool across from the background, and then held up his camera. He knew what way to point it so the picture would come out evenly, and he set it up in that way so the picture would not be rejected.
Hi-Rez waited for a moment before asking, “Ready?” to the couple, who responded simultaneously, “Yes.” Hi-Rez clicked the ‘take picture’ button on his camera, and a small light went off with a click.
A slight buzz was heard as a picture printed shortly thereafter from the camera, which he telekinetically grabbed automatically. He then used his magic walking stick to maneuver back to the stand, where he placed the picture. He waited for a short moment, and two sets of hoofsteps were heard walking up to the stand. Hi-Rez spoke with a minute amount of excitement and pleasure, “That’ll be one bit, please.”
The clatter of a coin dropping on the counter was heard, which Hi-Rez poked around to find by using telekinesis. He quickly located the bit and placed it under the counter, where a bag full of bits resided. The bit found its happy home at the top of the bag. He could hear the couple picking up the photo, so he happily chimed, “Thank you, and have a great day! If you’re happy with the service provided, please come back again soon! Tell all your friends!”
The couple walked away, cooing over each other and how great they looked in the picture. Hi-Rez’s ears fell slightly, only to perk back up with a grin. Looking sad on the job was bad for business, as he had learned the hard way once before.
Hi-Rez had several customers that day, but he could soon feel the warmth of the sun departing. He folded up his tripod-mount and picked up his camera with his telekinetic grip, then did the same for the pouch containing his profits of the day. He then used his magic to summon his magic walking stick, and began navigating the path back to his home, leaving his stand, well, standing.
As he slowly made his way back to his house, he felt a tapping on his shoulder. He instinctively turned his head towards the unknown tapping, asking, “Yes?”
Then a hoof met his face, and he went out faster than the flash bulb on his camera. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- AUTHOR'S NOTE: I am SO sorry about this chapter being so short! Next chapter should be pretty lengthy. Questions, comments, and spelling corrections are appreciated!
That was the first thing that crossed Hi-Rez’s mind.
The second thing that floated through his mind was wondering where his camera was.
It was the only thing his Father really left him before... passing away, so it meant the world to Hi-Rez.
He frantically began poking around with his telekinesis, searching everywhere around him. Two things immediately became apparent. One, he had found his camera. Upon realizing where his camera was, he snatched it up and held it to his chest, jumping for joy knowing that his prized item was safe.
After his moment of unadulterated joy was over, he remembered the second thing that had come to mind.
He was standing on soft ground.
Everywhere in ponyville had hard, stone roads that he could easily navigate.
Hi-Rez shouted for several minutes, hoping that somepony would be nearby. He called for help, but not a soul answered. Panic began to instill in his mind as he frantically poked around for any sort of solid path, but he found none.
Rez sighed. It looked like he was going to have to find his way around the hard way. If only Lens were here, he thought to himself, she’d know what to do. More importantly, she’d know where to go, Rez thought to himself.
Rez summoned up his magic walking stick in front of him again, and started to trek forward. He had no idea where he was and less of an idea where he was going, but it was a start.
It had been what felt like several hours since Rez woke up, and he wasn’t feeling very pleasant. He was tired, hungry, thirsty, and still had no idea where he was. Occasionally, he would call out, “Hello?” or “Is anypony there?” but he would never get a response. Every few minutes, he might find himself bumping into a tree or going over a hill, but nothing seemed familiar.
As he trotted onward, his magic walking stick began telling him that more and more trees were in his path, leading him to believe that he was walking into a wooded area, or maybe just a small patch of trees.
Little did he know, this was the edge of the everfree forest.
Rez had felt like he had been walking for miles, which he might have, for all he knew. He took a short moment to sit and rest, but it didn’t last long. A rustling in the bushes behind him caused him to jump to attention, waiting to see if it wasn’t just his imagination playing tricks on him.
The crackle of branches and leaves being brushed aside was heard, which was more than enough motivation to get Rez excited. Maybe somepony’s been searching for me after all! he thought to himself briefly, before hearing a low growl. Please oh please oh please be a pony… he prayed silently to himself, then audibly asking, “Is somepony there?”
An earsplitting roar answered his question.
Rez was on his hooves faster than a cloud could explode, and charged away in the opposite direction of the noise, immediately crashing head first into a tree. He was woozy for a second, but quickly recovered. He summoned his magic walking stick and bolted away, hearing snapping and crashing behind him.
His magic walking stick didn’t keep him from crashing into things entirely, but he certainly did hit things less frequently. Occasionally, he might have scraped his sides or tripped over a root, but the fear for his life spurred him onward… and right into somepony else.
“Oof!” he grunted, tumbling head over hooves, intertwined with this pony on accident. He quickly scrambled to his hooves and stated, “Sorry! I have no idea where I’m going!” but then two things occurred to him.
One, the form was clearly that of a pony, no mistaking it. Two, whatever was chasing him was now silent, or had retreated. His face immediately perked up with a massive smile that threatened to cut his head in half.
He fumbled around for a moment with the ground, searching for whomever it was that he had just stampeded into. He found whoever it was a moment later, and lifted them up into a strong embrace. “Thank goodness I found somepony! I’ve been lost out here for who knows how long!” Tears of joy threatened to stream down his face, until the stranger squirmed out of his grip.
“I don’t know who you are or why you are out here, but you are lost no longer, so you have nothing to fear.” came the heavily accented voice. It wasn’t an accent Rez had heard before, so he guessed whoever this was happened to be a newcomer, or perhaps she was lost too?
“Well, it’s nice to meet you, whoever you are. Now, can you direct me back to ponyville? I really have no idea where I am.” Rez said, paying nearly no heed to the stranger’s words. He didn’t realize how rudely close he was standing until he heard a couple of hoofsteps away from him. He almost thought the stranger was going to leave him stranded, until the steps stopped.
“My name is Zecora, and it is nice to meet you. Although, the everfree forest is not a place you should go through.” said Zecora, immediately bringing their location to light. “We’re in the everfree?!” Hi-Rez practically shouted out of disbelief. If this was the everfree, then he was lucky to be alive!
“The everfree is where we are currently, but we may no longer be if we do not retreat hurriedly!” Zecora said, accompanied by the faint sound of a howl in the distance. Rez heard hoofsteps away from him, so he instinctively followed. Whoever Zecora was, at least it was someone to travel with, regardless if she knew where they were going or not.
Wherever they were headed, it was rough goings. Hi-Rez very frequently tripped on protruding roots and brambles, getting more than his fair share of cuts and bruises. His torment only increased when Zecora picked up the pace, and Hi-Rez quickly found out why. Whatever had been chasing him before was back, as he could clearly hear behind him. Oh, come ON! he exclaimed in his head, hurrying to catch up with Zecora.
After another grueling few minutes of running through harsh terrain, Hi-Rez ran into what felt like a solid wall. Wow, big tree, he thought to himself, before using his magic walking stick to poke around at it. No, wait, that’s actually a wall. Are we back in town? he wondered quietly, before hearing a door close. Yep, definitely in town… although, if that were true, why would I still be standing on grass? he pondered, remembering the soft soil he was standing upon.
Maybe this is that house that belongs to that one Pegasus.. what was her name? She’s supposed to be really good with animals or something… Hi-Rez quietly brainstormed to himself, pacing in a circle. Yeah, that’s plausible, he figured, supposing that was the most logical choice. It’s not like anyone had a house in the everfree, because that would be crazy, right?
It took Rez a short moment to realize someone wal calling him. He slowly turned towards the voice, recognizing it as Zecora. She was inviting him inside. He acknowledged shortly later, then used his magic walking stick to navigate his way inside. "Thanks for inviting me inside," he said happily, before asking, "but where are we?"
Zecora answered, "This is my home, which I have built in the forest. Now you should lay down to relax, for rest is not something of which you need less." she rhymed again, which was really starting to annoy Rez. Wait, what did she just say? he wondered briefly, before reminding himself, She said we're in the forest. Who builds their house in the forest? Is this mare crazy?? He would have eyed her suspiciously if he could.
"So... this is still the everfree? We're not in ponyville?" Rez asked Zecora, almost disappointed. "I'm afraid that is so, but back to ponyville you cannot go." Zecora responded, which sparked a new fear in Rez's heart.
“What do you mean, I can’t go home?” Rez asked, taken slightly aback by the heedlessness of his own question. For all he knew, ponyville could have been wiped off the map, or overrun by monsters, or maybe some other emergency was happening.
Rez heard soft hoofsteps as he assumed Zecora was going about her business or organizing something, but she was actually turning towards him. She then spoke up, “Reasons for you being unable to leave are not something I can tell, but instead I must insist that you stay here for a spell.” She rhymed again, which induced Rez to sigh. He was getting tired of that.
“I’d love to, but I’m pretty sure my Mom will be wondering where I am. I told her I’d be back, so I really need to get going…” Rez summoned his walking stick and started to search for the door, but his path was then blocked by Zecora.
“I cannot allow you to leave, for should you go now your family would surely grieve. Many creatures of all sizes wait outside, so by this rule you should abide.” Zecora said firmly. When Rez tried to go around her again, he felt himself being gently pushed back by her hooves. She was resolute about him staying inside so, seeing no other option, he complied and sat on his haunches where he stood.
For what felt like hours Rez sat, just waiting and contemplating to himself. If there are so many creatures outside, why did Zecora build her house out here in the first place? was the first peculiar thought to cross his mind. …then again, she does seem a bit.. off. She rhymes, for one, and this place just feels creepy. he answered himself, not bothering to look around, since that would do him no good.
I swear, if I ever get back to ponyville, I’m going to do something about my blindness… he thought idly to himself.
After several hours really had passed, Rez began to feel weary. He guessed it was night, as things within Zecora’s home seemed to be cooling off. It was very subtle, but without his eyes distracting him, Rez’s other senses were always in overdrive to relay information about his whereabouts.
Zecora had been active this entire time, occasionally shuffling by Rez and throwing things about, some glass objects clattering on wooden surfaces and some sort of liquid bubbling and toiling, with scattered hoofsteps rushing about. Whatever Zecora was working on, she was certainly in a hurry to get it done.
Curiosity got the best of Rez, and he found himself asking, “What are you doing, anyhow? You sound busy, but I would like to know.” He turned his head to the side as she spoke, “This is not something of your concern, but it could soon be a lesson to learn.”
He was really starting to get tired of how cryptic she was getting.
“Ugh… fine, I’ll just wait here then, bored and becoming less attentive by the moment.” he said dully, returning his ‘attention’ to the nothingness that lay ahead. He casually picked at the floor with his hooves, before discovering that the floor was a very grainy wood, only cut from special trees that grew in the griffon kingdom. He had read about this kind of wood and how firm and unbreakable it was, and an idea sprang from his head. He focused on a small patch of the floor in front of him, and concentrated on the grains. His horn began to glow, as did the patch of wood. He explored every detail and inch of the wood with his magic, drawing up a mental image, until…
It appeared in front of him.
He could not believe what he was seeing. First off, he was actually SEEING! A huge grin shot across his face, threatening to split it in two, but then he began to concentrate further. He increased the amount of magic he had poured into the spot, and a color came into view. It was a very dark color and almost seemed out-of-place in the empty void that consisted of the rest of his vision. It was a very momentous occasion for him, so he didn’t even pay hardly any mind to the applications he could use this new spell for. He shifted his new viewport around the room, seeing bright colors and shapes of objects that he could once only feel.
A new feeling of excitement welled up inside him as he felt like he would explode from the sheer elation, and then he ‘looked’ out the window and saw…
A sunset.
It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, even though he hadn’t seen much, but the pure joy in his heart caused tears of pure delight to stream down his face as he caught a glimpse of the wondrous oranges and reds that the sun cast over the land as it bid farewell until the next day.
Rez stared at it until it had all but disappeared, watching as it slowly crept behind the horizon. Rez stared until he felt his horn straining to keep his vision lit, so he let the spell dissipate for the moment, and drifted back into darkness. His heart fell as his lovely view dissolved before him, casting his eyes once again upon the infinite blackness that came with being blind.
After a long time of experimenting with the spell, Rez finally got the idea to use it to look at Zecora, whoever she was. As he turned his ‘gaze,’ he noticed several things. One, Zecora was an oddly striped pony. What did they call those kinds of ponies again..? he wondered, before shaking off the thought. The second thing he noticed was that Zecora was staring at him in a weird way, as though she was shocked to see something. He looked around himself, half expecting to see some sort of monster, but then he saw his reflection in the mirror.
Where once blank eyes had rested in his head, there were now eyes with enlarging pupils.
This struck him in the face like a hammer, because he was told that his eyes were one solid color, which his Mom used to call ‘green.’ The small black spots in his eyes, as he quickly discovered, would grow or shrink based off of how much vision he granted himself through magic.
He quickly began to develop a headache as his mind told him he was using too much magic, so he shut down his ‘vision’ for the time being. “Wow.” was all he could say. He was so absolutely in awe of himself and his newfound ability that he didn’t even notice that his flank began to tingle…
An image appeared of a photo with an eye in it, which had a large red X strewn across it. In the middle of the X was a hole with a small green outline. Rez couldn’t see it, but Zecora was smiling affectionately as a bright flash announced the arrival of his cutie mark.
It was likely a moment she would remember for a long time.
Rez experimented more with his new sight capabilities, before he felt his strength leaving him. He briefly wondered why Zecora hadn’t bothered him the entire time, but his tiredness overtook his thoughts as he sought out a bed to sleep in. He sleepily found his way around the room, occasionally using his sight spell to find a bed. Once he had found one, a king-sized bed to be exact, he laid down on one side and was sleeping soundly within minutes.
“Hi-Rez, it’s time to get up,” a sweet voice rang in his ears, which he immediately recognized. It was his mother! He bolted up in bed and looked around the room, immediately seeing his mother. He didn’t recall being able to see, but he didn’t care. He was glad to be back with his mother. He embraced her lovingly and felt like he never wanted to let go… Until his father strode into the room.
Immediately, Rez let go of his mother and reeled back, surprised to see his living Dad, in the flesh, up and kicking. Tears of happiness found their way down his face as he moved to pull his Dad into a hug, but then he felt himself falling. He looked up and saw his parents laughing at him as he descended into a sheer black pit, falling, falling, falling…
WHUMP. Rez woke up immediately, flailing a bit, and then quickly realizing he had rolled onto the floor. He was sad for a moment, realizing he was not actually with his parents, until the memories from the previous day had been recalled and a smile shot across his face once more.
Well, at least I can see now, he thought happily to himself, standing and remembering he was in Zecora’s house. Now that he had his sight for the sightless spell, he would surely be able to find his way home. However, there was only one thought that troubled him…
After practicing a bit more with his sight spell, Hi-Rez felt confident that he could make it back to ponyville... assuming he would know what it looked like. If he could find just one landmark that he remembered the feel of, however, he would be able to find his way around easily.
He cast his sight spell and looked around the room once more, making note that Zecora was not inside. He quickly stood and felt disoriented, as he was not used to relying on his eyes instead of his walking stick and hooves alone. He stumbled for a moment as he attempted to navigate with his newfound colorful vision, his eyes and mind straining to completely comprehend that he could now see. He felt around instinctively anyway, being sure that he had his hoofing before setting out.
He took a few cautious steps towards the door, using both his natural senses and his newfound sense to navigate. His mind still had trouble grasping his ability to see, even though it was just a small viewpoint in the blackness. He had nearly passed out when he’d witnessed that sunset in the first place since his senses were so overloaded... that and the magical strain to see that far nearly wiped him out.
He progressed to the door, taking in every color of everything as he went, and eventually found the handle to the door. He put a hoof up against it and turned, then clicking the door open and pushing outward. As the door swung open, he gasped. New, bright colors filled his port into vision, which he could only describe as wonderful. Tall, unwavering trunks of dark colors filled out with many petals of brighter colors at the top, small brightly-colored stems with even brighter foliage covering a core, and many more things filled his view.
Basically, he was looking at all the plants.
Trees rose furiously from the ground, covered in dark bark and lavishly coated with leaves and branches spindling off this way and that, little blades of grass stuck up everywhere, a pair of beady eyes glaring at him from the brush...
Wait, what?
He reverted his magical gaze to a pair of shining, piercing eyes staring back at him. He was filled with a horror he did not understand, and immediately felt like running. He quickly turned to run, but his vision spell could not withstand all the sudden movement and flashing of colors and scenery. A small pop! was heard as Hi-Rez’s vision blurred, then vanished entirely, leaving him in the dark again, and with a greatly-timed headache. He tried to re-summon his field of vision, but his horn only sparked, and a wave of exhaustion flew through him. He tried to run regardless.
He got only a short distance away before tripping and nearly falling flat on his face, and that’s when he remembered to bring up his magic walking stick again. He had slight strain in doing so, probably from his recent failure with his vision spell, but he kept it up anyhow.
He never realized that the creature he thought he saw had not given chase.
For the first time since she moved away, Lens Cap stopped worrying about Rez. Lens hadn’t made another friend since she moved. She would sit at her window each day, worrying that Rez had gotten lost or hurt, wanting to go back to ponyville to see if he was alright. She wanted to be sure he was alright, among other things, but that wasn’t something she was going to talk about, much less let herself think about.
However, today, she actually had a small moment of relief. She wasn’t actually thinking about Rez that day, so she went to her room. The break from worry didn’t last long.
Thinking about Rez wasn’t the only thing she did all day. She kept a journal of the day’s actions and her thoughts, then snapped a photo of the important event or item of the day. In this case, she didn’t write much. She only wrote the same thing she’d been writing for her last few entries.
Today was another dull day, since I’d moved here. Not much has happened, and I can’t stop worrying about Hi-Rez. I haven’t eaten much and I haven’t gone outside.
She stopped for a moment, before adding,
I need to see him again. I need to be sure he’s okay. I just need to see him one more time. Just once. Just to be sure he’s safe.
She grabbed a camera from a nearby desk and took a snapshot of herself. The picture came out, depicting a forlorn Lens Cap. She taped it into her journal and closed it, then wandered back to her window. Her parents insisted she get outside at some point, as they said it was unhealthy just to sit all day, but her worries took up all her thoughts.
What if he got lost? He’s blind, so he might not ever find his way home. She shuddered at the thought, and the many that followed. What if he’s hurt? What if there’s nopony around to help him? What if he’s lost AND hurt? What if he’s lost and hurt and I could have helped him? What if I could have prevented it?
These ponderings and more plagued her mind, repeating themselves every day like a broken record jammed into your ear. It bothered her to no end, and every day, she would ask the same question.
Rez panted with exhaustion. He’d run as far as his hooves would take him, and then ran further, until his hooves would carry him no farther. He collapsed on the ground in a heap and breathed heavily, desperately trying to give oxygen to his body that craved it so horribly.
After convulsing for a moment as his body attempted to calm itself, he simply laid and rested for a few moments. He didn’t know if he was still being pursued, or that he wasn’t being chased in the first place, so he only stayed down for a few seconds.
He quickly righted himself and continued to navigate his way away from whatever he thought was running after him, quickly realizing there were no trees here.
Then he realized there was no ground here.
It took him a second to realize he was falling.
It only took a nanosecond for him to start screaming.
In a panicked effort, he tried to re-summon his vision to attempt to get a grasp on the situation, so he could help himself out of his dilemma. His attempts failed and only left him more desperate. He didn’t know how far down the ground was, and he didn’t know what lay below him, either, so it was take action or die in this situation.
In a last-ditch effort, he aimed generally down and poured whatever strength he had left into his horn. He let out a massive burst of energy and sustained it as long as he could, shooting a continual beam downward in an attempt to slow himself. It worked for a moment, but Rez could feel his energy draining away by the second. He tried to keep the stream stable, but he was struggling to even retain his fading consciousness as the last of his strength left him. He managed to keep the stream going, but his body went numb and awareness dulled away as he lost consciousness. The stream faded shortly thereafter, and he fell the remaining two feet with a soft thump, landing on a patch of dry dirt.
Something rang out in the back of Lens’ mind. Something that wouldn’t let her rest, or take her thoughts off of Hi-Rez. Something that simply shouted: He’s in trouble! You have to do something! But of course, she knew she couldn’t do anything. Rez wouldn’t be anywhere even remotely near here, unless he was coming to visit, but that was unlikely. She had never even told Rez where she was moving to. She looked out almost expectantly of her window, viewing the skyline over the tall buildings, then averting her gaze to the ponies shuffling about on their own business below. She studied them hastily, almost expecting to see Rez.
She shifted her weight from one side to another before deciding to go outside. She almost felt like searching for him, but she wasn’t sure why. It’s not like she’d find him out here.
Hi-Rez was awoken by a sharp jab in his side. He jumped to a start, literally, being on his hooves as fast as he could scramble onto them. He was still breathing heavy, but then a slightly familiar voice began talking, “Oh, glad you’re awake! At first I didn’t think you were okay and that wouldn’t have been okay because being dead is boring and I would know because I knew a stallion who used to be alive but he stopped being alive and I was really sad but before he was dead he said I shouldn’t be sad so I wasn’t sad but I still missed him because he was my friend and friends are nice to have but dead friends are really boring because they can’t do anything and not doing anything is really boring and” the voice took a massive breath, “I’m just glad that you’re alive because you took a biiiiiiig fall and I thought you were dead and I like to have living friends because they can do things with me.” The clearly female voice stopped talking, leaving Rez a few moments to gather his thoughts, but then she added, “So, who’re you? My name’s Pinkie Pie!”
Now he remembered the voice. He’d been in Sugar Cube Corner enough times to know that voice well enough to be a crazy pony that everyone described as ‘pink.’ He had no idea what ‘pink’ was, seeing as he had only just recently discovered vision. He did, however, know that this pony was out of her mind. However, in a situation like this, he would take any help he could get.
With a sigh of defeat, he said, “I’m Hi-Rez Shot. Can you help me back to Ponyville? I can’t see.” He gave another shot at summoning his vision spell, but failed again.
“Yeah, okay!” Pinkie responded happily. “Now, which way is Ponyville?”
Hi-Rez had been walking for hours... or at least, that’s what his psychotic ‘pink’ companion kept telling him, over and over and over again. Hi-Rez swore that, if he ever got back to Ponyville without becoming deaf, he would pay the ‘pink’ menace to his ears to stop talking.
They had trudged on for what felt like forever, or at least, Rez was sure he was trudging. The ‘pink’ energized ball of crazy next to him sounded like she was bouncing.
How can anyone be so happy all the time, especially at a time like this? Rez complained to himself, the exhaustion of the day catching up to him.. or at least, he thought it was day? IS it day? Rez wondered. It was chilly outside, sure, but he couldn’t ever be sure of much anymore. The weather team had been off lately, since their Captain had gone off on some official business or some other nonsense.
“Do you see Ponyville yet?” Rez asked in a mildly harsh tone, immediately biting his lip at his own action. She doesn’t deserve me being mean to her, he corrected himself, she hasn’t done anything wrong. She’s just annoying. “Nope!” she responded giddily, again seeming far too happy for the situation. Rez had to wonder how she managed to stay so positive all the time.
Well, you know, there’s actually a simple explanation for that! You see, when I was just a litt- Pinkie, you’re a part of this story. Get back in it and stop breaking the fourth wall. Do you even realize how much time it takes to fix that thing? Well, no, but... Exactly. Now, I want you to get back in the story. We can talk later, but right now, I’ve got a yarn to spin and a wall to fix, so go on. Okay... Much better. Now, where was I..? Ah, yes.
Rez had tripped and stumbled a few times, but that could be expected from a blind stallion on rough terrain. He only had his magic walking stick to guide him, which Pinkie occasionally tried to grab or mess with. Rez wasn’t sure if she was just being playful, or was purposefully trying to sabotage what senses he had to work with.
Few questions really poked at Rez at this moment, the first and foremost being, How in Equestria did this pink mental patient get out here in the first place? The answer to this question floated about just out of the reach of his mind, rendering him unable to pinpoint any reasoning as to why she might be lost, and out here, of all places!
He shuffled along silently for a few minutes, his anklets silently clacking against his hooves as he walked. It sounded like the pink maniac was still bounding along beside him, probably with some huge grin plastered across her face. Curiously, Rez tried to use his sight spell, but another short sputter and a headache later confirmed that he was still magically drained. With a very short sigh, he asked the insane pink pony, “So, what’re you doing out here in the forest, anyhow?”
Pinkie let out an excited squeak. “Ooh, I’ve been waiting to tell you that story!” she exclaimed, then suddenly spouting words like a fountain, “First, I was at Sugar Cube Corner and I was baking a cake with the cakes which is pretty funny when you think about it because it’s almost like the cakes are baking their own kind which would be weird because nobody really bakes ponies because they don’t really need baking since they’re not really baked goods but if they were I’m sure they would taste like mint chocolate-chip ice cream and chocolate sauce and chocolate-chip cookies and chocolate syrup and chocolate cake and-“ she stopped for a moment and took a huge breath, “and I’m sure they’d be really tasty but they’re not so back to what I was saying about the cakes and me making a cake for a pony in the hospital because I thought it would cheer them up and make them better so I could throw them an ‘I-got-better’ party but then I thought why not throw them an ‘I’m-not-dead’ party instead so we were baking the cake when I found another bag of sugar in the back of a cabinet full of sprinkles and the cakes told me not to touch it but I wasn’t sure why so I took a little taste of it and” she stopped for another second, taking a huge breath and looking right at Rez, “then I ended up out here, and then I encountered you!” Rez could almost feel the happiness emanating from her face.
“That… uh…” Rez started, putting on a fake smile and looking generally where he thought Pinkie would be. “..makes.. sense?” From what he could gather, the Cakes had something that they shouldn’t have, Pinkie found it, and she lost her mind somehow and ended up just as lost as he had. Great, he thought, now we’re probably even LESS likely to find our way back to ponyville. He turned to keep walking, looking slightly annoyed, but then Pinkie stated, “Oh, that’s the wrong way, by the way.”
“What makes you say that?” Rez asked, not stopping.
“The lake.”
“What do you meAAAAAAHH!!” Rez suddenly shouted, falling off a short ledge and landing with a splash! in water. He panicked for a moment, before he stabilized himself in the water, doing a steady paddle to keep himself afloat. He struggled for a bit to stay above the water, before conjuring up his magic walking stick and poking about hurriedly in the water to find land, which he shortly did. He paddled back to shore and shook himself off, then doing a quick inventory.
Vest? Wet, but check. Film? In a plastic case, so check. Anklets? Check. Camera? Rez suddenly had a horrible thought. Had his camera gone into the water with him? A feeling of despair suddenly swept over him, before Pinkie chimed in, “Here it is! I held onto it so it wouldn’t get wet when you fell into the water!” Rez’s face immediately went to an extremely joyful grin, and he poked around with his magic in the direction of Pinkie’s voice. He located the camera and floated it back to himself, saying, “Oh, thank goodness!” He then galloped over to Pinkie, whose location he knew due to previous magical searching, and wrapped her into a big hug. “Thankyouthankyouthankyou!” he practically shouted in her ear, squeezing her tightly. If it wasn’t obvious, he was preposterously overjoyed that his camera was safe.
It took him a moment to realize he was basically choking Pinkie to death, but he was alerted to this by a tapping on his shoulder. He loosened up, took a step back and let Pinkie go, who then took a deep breath. “Sorry.” Rez said, rubbing the back of his head with a hoof. Tiny sparkles of magic floated from the ‘veins’ in his mane, which then suddenly began to glow. Color suddenly burst into his eyes, to which he almost recoiled. He was looking at an extremely bright pony, so he covered his eyes for a moment as he couldn’t fully process the color at first. That must be ‘pink,’ he thought to himself. He set his hoof back down and basically just gawked at Pinkie, taking in the vibrant and foreign color once more. He caught himself staring, and turned away, looking out over a big, glassy lake of blue water glinting with yellow and white of the sunshine. It nearly brought a tear to his eye.
“You’re welcome.” Pinkie said, laying a hoof on his shoulder, which was considerably difficult due to his height. It was a nice moment, but the rumbling of both of their stomachs simultaneously broke the silence. Rez looked a bit sheepish. “Oh, don’t worry, I brought Cupcakes!” Pinkie said, showing that she had a Cupcake in each of her front hooves while standing on her hind hooves. She tossed one to Rez and ate the other whole, including its wrapper. Rez caught the Cupcake and said a quick “Thanks,” before carefully unwrapping the Cupcake and biting into it.
Almost immediately, he could tell something was off. For starters, the Cupcake didn’t taste sugary at all. Knowing Pinkie, it might as well have been a sugar-flavored, sugar-coated sugar-frosted sugarcake with extra sugar, but this Cupcake almost tasted.. sour. The next thing that caught his attention was that his ‘vision’ was beginning to blur. At first, it was very slight, but then it looked like entire parts of the landscape were becoming a fog. Then, his ‘sight’ went dark. A loud thump! was heard off to his side. This troubled him at first, but then he felt very, very calm.
Rez groaned as he came to. He slowly stood, feeling dried mud flake off as he shook himself off. A slight cringe of pain shot through his head, so he raised a hoof to rub it, but quickly retracted it as he felt a burning, searing heat in his hoof. He was worried that he might be hurt, so he began to use his magic to check himself, but what he intended to be a poke felt like being tackled by a Pegasus at Mach 2. In the same way, Rez went flying and tumbled along the ground for a few feet before coming to a stop. He stood and rubbed his side, discovering that a large bruise had already formed.
He summoned his ‘vision’ again, but instead of coming into view as usual, his line of sight almost exploded with amazingly bright colors. He closed his eyes for a brief moment before opening them again, seeing that everything was settling back into its normal colors. He scanned the environment, finding himself worried about Pinkie, but discovering she was not nearby. At least I still know where I am, he thought with a short chuckle to himself, wincing at the pain in his side then looking down at a puddle in front of him.
He let out a quick gasp, looking over what he looked like.
For starters, he was taller than normal. He was at least two hooves taller than he was before, with his body, head and legs becoming longer and more slender in compensation. The next thing he saw was his horn, which was significantly longer than before.
The last thing he noticed was his Mane and Tail. Instead of its normal brown with little yellow ‘veins’ running through it, the ‘veins’ now seemed to be glowing a very bright yellow, with little specks of bright magic forming and hovering about them.
He was transfixed by his image for a few minutes, before looking away and thinking, Can things get any weirder?
AUTHOR’S NOTE: I used Babelfish for translations from English to German, seeing as I don’t know it myself.
Oh look, things CAN get stranger.
This was the first thought out of his head as Rez began exploring around. Upon taking the landscape in, he definitely noticed things were… different, to say the least.
How different?
How about you ask the upside-down trees and the flower floating by his face?
Rez briefly wondered if he was conscious, so he raised a claw to his shoulder and pinched it. Ouch! He thought, jumping back a bit. Okay, I’m definitely awake. He looked out over the scenery to get a better grasp on his bearings, but the ground was undulating and changing color as though made of liquid rainbow in a wind storm. It gave him a dizzy headache, and he lost his hoofing from seeming to be unable to balance.
He stumbled around briefly, trying to make sense of the ever-shifting ground, but decided to look up instead.
He regretted it.
Above him, the clouds were in a tizzy, shooting this way and that, diving into the sky and making big splashes of fire and pizza everywhere.
That’s got to be the creepiest thing I’ve ever gehesen.
Was, warten?
Rez puzzled at himself for a moment, before speaking aloud, “Warum spreche ich in einer Sprache, die ich nicht verstehe?” He recoiled for a second, before quickly making note to himself that he couldn’t understand himself… or at least, he tried to, but he couldn’t understand himself.
“Dies hat die seltsamen Sache sein, die jemals passiert ist.” He said to himself, sighing about being confused with himself. He looked back down and turned to leave, but was confronted by a forty-hoof-tall behemoth.
It only took him a moment to scream.
It only took another second for him to swim in the opposite direction.
He took off screaming at the top of his lungs, dodging between celery stalks to get away from the massive beast. He looked behind him between bursts of speed, only to see the creature was hot on the trail… which made sense, considering the trail behind him had burst into flames from the clouds carelessly doing sky-dives into the smoky abyss above.
Lens Cap could take it no longer. She’d been doing the same routine ever since she had arrived, and every day she only longed worse to go back and check up on Rez.
She did, however, finally start going outside and doing other things to occupy her mind.
She would sit on street corners and think. It reminded her of all the times that Rez tripped over a curb.
She would talk to other ponies. It reminded her of how many other ponies Rez would bump into.
She would walk up and down familiar streets, just trying to get her mind off of the one problem she could not evade. It reminded her of how much time she spend with Rez, just guiding him around.
All the times she had to pick him up off the ground because he tripped over something small or bumped into somepony.
All the times he made great jokes.
All the times he had smiled so warmly, yet his eyes kept their same piercing, empty stare.
All the times she had felt things about him.
All the times she wished she could have confessed her feeling for him.
The one time that it mattered the most, but she just got on the train and left.
It all burned in her mind like someone had branded it on her brain and left an infinitely-playing record in her ears… and she couldn’t stand it. She needed to get up off her lazy flank and do something about it.
So, when she returned home later that day, she said to her parents, “I’m going to Ponyville.”
“No you’re not.” her Father responded, not looking up from the day’s newspaper.
“Wh.. why not?” she said, almost shocked.
“Because we’re going to Ponyville.” her Father looked up from the paper with a grin that could only be described as a look that screams: ‘Gotcha.’ Lens sighed with a simultaneous giggle, rolling her eyes and wandering off to her room. Well, at least they were going to Ponyvi-
WAIT.
WHAT?
Lens’ brain finally processed what her Dad had actually said, to which she responded with a massive grin, an excited “Eeee!” and a jump for joy. She shot like lightning to her room and began to frantically dig through, well, everything to find all the things she wanted to bring with. She hurriedly brought out a suitcase and flung it over her bed, then messily began scrambling to pile as many things as she could into that suitcase.
After feeling he had put significant distance between himself and the wall of creature that had previously been following him, Rez stopped and leaned against a giant pile of quarters to rest. He was breathing heavily, and it was definitely getting colder, because he could see his own breath in front of him. It waved an angry hoof at him before dissipating, to which Rez only shook his woozy head.
He had given up trying to process things several minutes ago. It was either that, or he’d already had a nervous breakdown and was having a seizure somewhere and was just imagining this… but that was very unlikely. He pinched himself earlier, so he knew he was probably awake. Unless his mind had shut down completely from being unable to comprehend anything. Yeah, that would be bad. He thought to himself, looking confusedly forward into a waterfall of brown cakes, realizing he could understand himself again. “Well, it’s a start.” he said aloud, making quick note that it echoed.
As he stood to continue onward, he turned another direction to avoid a wizard pony casting spells on his left, and a fire-breathing frog on his right. Things were sure unusual today.
Lens was still throwing things around her room when her Father entered. "We’re not leaving just yet, y’know. You can take your time packing.”
Lens didn’t hear him. She was packing her camera, rolls of film, her journals, clothing that she didn’t really need, and other non-necessary items with gusto. Finally going back to Ponyville! she thought frenziedly, hurrying to aggregate all the unnecessary things she wanted to bring with.
In the time that the story cut away from Rez, he’d managed to get himself hurt. How convenient. He wasn’t completely sure how it’d happened, but he had somehow managed to run headlong into a wall of metal. A small green splatter on the wall showed that he had been running full speed.
Rubbing his snout and wincing at the pain, Rez turned around to find that the landscape had changed slightly. Everything seemed to be settling back into place, there were no crazy creatures running after him, and the celery stalks became trees.
“Well, weirder things have happened today,” he said with a cross-eyed laugh, then proceeding to completely shut down due to the incomprehensibility of the situation, falling flat on the grassy ground, rendered completely unconscious.
Lens had two days to pack. Two whole days?! That’s way too long to wait!! she thought to herself, shifting impatiently from hoof to hoof by her usual window seat. She had an entire forty-three hours to wait until she would be departing for Ponyville and leaving this drab scene behind.
For starters, hardly anyone wanted pictures there. They were all too busy, and none-too-friendly. Secondly, nothing there seemed as inviting or pleasing as they did in Ponyville. Next up was how crowded everything seemed… cars hurrying around this way and that, buildings packed so tight you can’t see the sun, and nobody really seemed to be in any mood to stop and talk, as they all seemed too busy to care.
Everything was boring, nothing was fun, and nothing EVER HAPPENED.
In Ponyville, even though most of the exciting events weren’t always for the best, at least they were something. Whereas, where Lens lived, nothing ever happened.
No curses.
No strange encounters.
No awkward quests.
No adventures.
No evils rising to fight again.
NOTHING.
It was the most boring place that ever existed in the entire history of forever. For all time. In all of eternity. Always. Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a bit, but that’s certainly how Lens felt about the place. She couldn’t wait to get back to Ponyville.
In Ponyville, an unusually green Stallion had just bought a baker’s dozen of cupcakes. He felt satisfied in the purchase, having gotten 20% off when he bought an additional four cupcakes. With a smirk, he walked onward.
Until a tap-tap-tapping on his shoulder stopped him.
He turned around to greet the disturbance, but was met with a hoof to the face. Out in the open. Where everyone would clearly see the assailant.
Recoiling a bit from the hit, he angrily turned to the direction of the assaulter, but was met with an empty plaza. Where is everypony suddenly? He thought to himself, shaking his snout out a bit before turning to continue onward.
In the shadows of a nearby bush, a self-angered pony sat in disgust. “Failure.” He whispered to himself. It appeared that some ponies were simply more resilient to hooves to the face than that one blind one had been.
“Hey. Get up, lazy bones. Yeah, I’m talking to you, now get up!”
Rez stirred from his sleep as a hoof poked him on the side of his head. Repeatedly.
He woke and opened his eyes, and suspected that he had not opened them at all. Oh, wait. I’m still blind, he thought with a laugh to himself, his horn then igniting. Color flooded into his eyes once again as the world came into view. It was still beautiful. Never gonna get tired of this, he thought with a smile.
He then turned to see who was poking him, and was greeted by a red Pegasus Mare. She poked him again anyhow. He stood briefly thereafter, towering over her with sudden heightened stature, coming to just over twice her height. She looked up at him with an almost frightened face, but replaced it with false courage. “Cool.” She said as he stood, looking him up and down as though sizing him up for something.
Galsthan gave a short grunt and rubbed his head. He noticed his leg looked slimmer, so he looked down at himself and almost gave himself a case of vertigo. He was much taller and more slender than he had remembered himself being. With similar curiosity, he put a hoof up to his horn, which was now even lengthier. He let his hoof come to a rest at the tip, which was very sharp as he quickly discovered. “Ow.” he said, then looking back down at the red Pegasus.
“So… how did you find me?” he asked, lowering his stance slightly as not to intimidate.
“Well, I was just flying over the forest looking for this thief who took something from me, and I saw you passed out on the ground, so I figured: ‘hey, why not go bother this guy and make sure he’s not dead?’ So I did, and it turns out you’re not dead. Name’s Pyre Aileron, and you can thank me later. Now, I gotta go back to Ponyville. Catch ya later!” With that, she gave a powerful flap and took to the skies in a flurry of wind.
Galsthan shielded his eyes then looked up, extending a hoof and shouting, “Wait! I don’t know…” It was too late. She had already flown off. “…how to get back…” He looked down at the ground sadly, before getting an idea in his head. Wait, if she’s going back to Ponyville, then maybe I can just go the way she went and find my way back! Yeah, that’ll w-
His thoughts were interrupted by a sudden force tackling him to the ground. He turned himself over to see a familiar pink psychopath standing over him, teary-eyed. “Oh thank goodness I found you I was so worried when I got up because you didn’t get up and I went to get help but I didn’t find any and when I came back you were gone so I thought some big monster ate you and that would’ve made me sad because I didn’t want to lose a friend to some big nasty monster and-“ she choked for a moment, tears streaming down her face and dripping onto Hi-Rez. She pulled him into a big hug, continuing through her crying, “I was just so afraid I’d lost you forever!” She was openly streaming tears now as they uncharacteristically shot like rivers from her eyes.
Rez was taken aback at first, unsure how to act, but returned the embrace, patting her back lightly and cooing, “Uh.. There, there, it’s going to be okay…”
It took several minutes for Pinkie to calm down, but she eventually managed to stop crying.
She gradually broke away from him, wiping her eyes, then a happy look sprang back onto her face. “Now that we’re travelling buddies again, let’s go find our way back to Ponyville like we were going to do anyway!” she immediately started to bound away, but Rez called out to her to stop, so she did.
“There was a Pegasus here earlier, and I think she knew the way back to Ponyville. Now, she flew off in tha-“ Rez was interrupted yet again by Pinkie.
“WHAT?! You found another travelling buddy?? What about ME?? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!?” she took on an angry look and had grabbed his shoulders by this time, and was violently shaking him back and forth. Not stopping to ask how she was able to reach his shoulders, Rez replied between shakes.
“I was just getting directions!” he exclaimed, to which Pinkie stopped shaking him.
“Oh, that’s okay then!” she said, her normal happy look returning to her face. “Lead the way!”
Lens was bursting at the seams with excitement. Just two minutes until the train arrived and they could leave for Ponyville!! She was literally bouncing with excitement at the train station, which drew the attention of many a pony in the crowd.
As the train pulled up, you could swear Lens was going to explode if she got any more excited. She practically threw her parents onto the train, luggage in tow, and leapt aboard herself just as the doors opened.
The train departed shortly thereafter, and her parents couldn’t pry Lens off of the window.
Rez’s leading ended abruptly as the duo found themselves on top of a cliff.
“Well, that was effective.” Rez said sarcastically, looking down the cliff. It could have easily been two hundred hooves high, and had jagged rocks at the bottom. Not a survivable jump.
Pinkie didn’t seem to notice or care, as she bounded right off the ledg- WAIT, WHAT?
Suddenly realizing what Pinkie had just done, Rez sprang forward and just barely caught Pinkie’s tail between his teeth. He dug his hooves in as much as he could, but was pulled forward significantly from Pinkie’s weight. Goodness, what does she eat?? Rez complained to himself as he attempted to haul Pinkie back up onto the ledge, whom had spread her hooves out wide and was shouting “Whoooo! I can fly!”
Struggling, Rez began to slowly back up as beads of sweat ran down his face. He almost lost his grip for a moment and could have gone careening down the perilous fall, but he managed to save himself just in time while still keeping a grip on Pinkie’s tail.
Pinkie, who was still unaware of the danger, was now flailing about wildly as she tried to control her ‘flight.’
Oh jeez! Please stop please stop please stop! he thought to himself in a panic as he began to lose his bite on Pinkie’s tail… which oddly tasted like peppermint.
Too late.
Pinkie slipped from his grip and started to plummet to her impending doom.
Rez wouldn’t stand for that, so he did what any other panic-driven pony moron would have done right then.
He jumped.
Pinkie was flailing about in the air as she attempted to fly once more, but her mysterious ‘power’ had seemed to vanish. She looked down, and the smile on her face broke as she realized what she was about to face.
As they fell, Rez managed to close the distance between him and Pinkie Pie. He grabbed her, even though she was confused, around the middle and maneuvered back towards the cliff, which he then tried to dig his remaining hooves into to slow their descent.
Instead of slowing down, Rez only managed to nick the Cliffside, which caused him and Pinkie to tumble end-over-end, distorting them beyond the time needed for recovery.
Rez held his last companion tight as the ground rushed up to meet them.
The train slowed as it approached Ponyville. Over the loudspeaker, the conductor announced that they would be arriving in roughly five minutes.
Lens leaned into the window so hard that her parents swore she would fuse with it.
Hurry up hurry up hurry up hurry up hurry up hurry up! Lens egged the train on with her mind as they drew ever-nearer to Ponyville. She had already been bouncing with excitement, but now she was leaping with joy! She was almost there, and she could finally be sure that Rez was okay!
Lens had a grim thought. What if he ISN’T okay?? No, no! I refuse to let that be an option. Of COURSE he’s okay!
Restoring her positive thoughts, Lens waited eagerly to get off the train.
Rez awoke dizzily, his head spinning as he became aware of his surroundings.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
Rez shifted with herculean effort to move his hooves, and managed to get one out from under his covers and onto his night stand. For some odd reason, most of his body felt encased by something stiff. He fumbled around to find his alarm clock, but realized shortly that there was no alarm clock.
Must’ve knocked it onto the floor... he thought groggily to himself as he opened his eyes.. and was greeted by blackness. Oh, right, he thought, I can’t believe how easy it is to forget I’m bliiiiiIIIIIAAAAAAA-
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Rez’s thoughts were interrupted by someone screaming. A jolt of pain and another yell later, Rez realized it was himself screaming in agony. Then the pain caught up with him.
It felt like he had been hit by the biggest boulder in the history of the universe... which was made of scissors. While on fire. While simultaneously standing on the sun... which was going supernova.
Between screams, Rez could hear various ponies rushing about and shouting. The pain intensified, regardless of how bad it was originally, for a moment, and Rez began to have spasms.
He could feel several pairs of hooves holding him down, then a needle went into his left foreleg, which caused him to yelp in pain and struggle against whomever was restraining him.
Then, bit by bit, the pain began to subside. Rez’s hearing began to clear up, and he wasn’t convulsing anymore. Slowly, he began to feel quite relaxed, and the pain eventually entirely faded away.
“..you......eelin...” a voice began, but Rez could not make out the entire sentence.
“..awake?” Rez could at least hear that much, so he gave a slow nod to the mysterious speaker. He would have nodded quickly, but he began to feel quite tired, and couldn't quite pin why, but he felt restricted as far as movement.
“.ood... goin... inj....... test.” Rez couldn’t decrypt that message, so he just displayed a confused look until he felt another needle in his foreleg. This time, however, it didn’t really hurt. He was just more or less aware of its presence.
A wave of energy coursed through him suddenly, which caused him to gasp and attempt to bolt upright. He quickly realized he couldn’t sit up. Pain soaked back into his body, but not nearly as severely as before.
“Whoa, take it easy, now. That was some fall. You’re pretty lucky to be alive, but you’re in good hooves now, so there’s nothing to worry about. Also, your pink friend’s been wanting to see you.” The same warm-toned voice from before spoke to him, and mentioned the pink mental patient.
Oh, no. No, no, no, no no no no no nonononononoNONONONO
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep beep beep!
A reassuring hoof was placed on his shoulder, which managed to calm him down significantly. Thankfully, he didn’t have to get injected again.
More hoofsteps were heard by Rez’s twitching ears, and a muffled conversation outside the door alerted Rez of a very familiar voice.
It was that pink psychopath.
The beeping machine only accelerated slightly this time.
Rez heard hoofsteps approaching his location, which he presumed to be a bed in a hospital somewhere. “Omigosh! Thank goodness you’re alive!” The pink pony practically screamed.
Out of nowhere, he was pulled into a big hug and a wave of monstrously-proportioned pain rippled through his body.
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep beep beep!
Rez clenched his teeth tightly as the mind-numbing pain locked up his muscles.
Rushing hoofsteps were heard as the pink one pulled away. Rez could make out someone scolding someone or other, which was likely the doctor to Pinkie. Thankfully, within a brief period of time, the pain had gone away and the beeping machine returned to its normal pace.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
After a short while and more hoofsteps, Rez heard a door close. A hoof was gently placed his face a moment later, but he wasn’t sure whose it was.
He tried to open his mouth to speak, but shortly found that the same rough material was also around his mouth and most of his face, preventing him from opening his mouth.
Muffled noises exited from his closed mouth, which was responded to with the hoof casually stroking his face. “There, there, my little Rezzy, everything’s going to be okay.” The voice that spoke, likely the owner of the hoof, was Pinkie Pie. She sounded slightly different though, with a sort of serious and reassuring tone.
That changed quickly. Her hoof moved away from Rez’s face as she shouted, “Once you’re all better, I can throw you a ‘nearly-died-but-didn’t-and-saved-Pinkie’s-life’ party! Woohoo!” A few flecks of paper fell onto Rez for all he knew, since hardly any of his body was not covered in the mysterious rough material, which he logically pieced together to be a cast.
I must’ve broken every bone in my body, he thought sadly. His mind then turned back to Pinkie, who had stated he saved her life. Wow, did I really? I mean, sure, I probably broke her fall, but there’s no way she could have lived anyhow! I hardly did! These discomforting thoughts and more began to plague his mind, which made the beeping machine accelerate its tone.
Beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep!
Beep beep beep!
This was quelled, however, when Pinkie’s hoof met his face once again. It was so soft...
He felt tingly for a moment as she began stroking him again, which calmed him down quite significantly. In fact, he was feeling quite sleepy...
Pinkie’s soft touch, the roughness of the cast, and whatever pain lingered all faded as Rez drifted off into a relaxing sleep.
Chapter 8: Magnesium has nothing to do with this chapter.
Well, at least I didn’t wake up somewhere else… again. Rez thought this sarcastically to himself as he came into consciousness. The constant beeping of the heart rate machine next to him was starting to annoy him, but he wrote it off for now. He’d be out soon enough.
Rez attempted to shift himself, but the abrasive materials that encompassed most of his body stopped him. Oh, right… he thought with a defeated sigh. He would try to summon up his magic vision to survey his environment, but the doctor had already talked to him about this earlier. He wasn’t supposed to use magic until he was out of the hospital. He wasn’t even supposed to use it to retrieve nutrition, as a nurse constantly came through to check on him.
It was nice that the nurse brought food and water for him when he needed it, and it was also nice that the nurse had brought him an extra pillow at request, but the kindest thing she’d done so far was read him a story when he was feeling tired. It had been earlier that day… well, he thought it was day? Actually, being sightless and being under a blanket surrounded by a cast constantly made it near impossible to tell what time it was. Only the nurse was his way of telling time.
Anyway, he was pretty sure it was still day… until the familiar sound of the door opening and a voice speaking blew that idea out of the water. “Hi-Rez, are you awake? It’s time for dinner. I brought you a grilled Silk Chinese lantern sandwich and some soup. I was just going to bring you the usual, but somepony stopped by today and donated these. They said they were specifically for you.”
The nurse wheeled the cart over beside his bed, and then set a tray of food next to Rez on his bed. Over the course of the next ten minutes, she fed the food to Rez almost in the way that a mare would feed a foal. Rez never would have admitted he was embarrassed, but at least he was glad that his jaw had managed to heal so quickly.
After she was done feeding him, Rez gently said, “Thanks,” and put on the best smile he could, which was mildly restricted from the rest of the cast around his face. “You’re quite welcome,” the nurse responded as she wheeled the cart away. The sound of a door announced her departure, and Rez was alone once more.
Rez sighed. He had nothing to do, now that the nurse had departed. He would try to turn on the television they had in the room, but he wouldn’t be able to watch it anyhow. He considered trying to turn on the subtitles or calling the nurse and asking her to do so, but he tossed the idea and decided to get rest.
Unfortunately, he’d been doing this for a long time before he’d been sleeping, so he was quite bored. Well, he was bored until the nurse showed up, but now he was bored once more. Deciding it’d be nice to at least listen to the TV, Rez fumbled around with the limited range that he had until he found the remote, which had been right next to him the entire time.
Using his very restricted range of movement, Rez eventually managed to get the Television to turn on. From the sounds, it must have been a soccer game. Rez thought soccer was okay, but it wasn’t one of his favorite pastimes, so he flipped the channel. Now it sounded like some sort of shopping channel. Rez couldn’t really make use of a shopping channel without vision, so he changed the channel again. This time, it sounded silent at first, so he listened intently to attempt to figure ou-
BOOM
Rez practically jumped ten feet in the air… or at least, would have jumped, had he been able to move. He quickly changed the channel and lowered the volume as to avoid the same mistake. In fact, he was starting to accept the idea of rest, so he clicked the TV off and tried to relax.
Having practically flown off the train, Lens had been all over Ponyville by the time it arrived in the station. She hadn’t found Rez with his parents, by his booth, or any other location she knew he would hang around. She didn’t even see evidence of any recent photo-taking, so of course, she became quite concerned at first.
She went to talk to Rez’s mother, but she didn’t help much. All she had learned was that Rez had stepped out to do business, and he hadn’t been seen back for awhile. His parents sure have confidence in him being capable of taking care of himself, she thought, so why shouldn’t I?
Having complete and utter, undeniable assurance that Rez was safe, she turned a- who am I kidding?
After about ten minutes, she was as worked up as a member of P.E.T.A. at a foreign foods cook-off. There was no evidence of Rez having been in town in the past few days, little to no accounts of recent events regarding him, and even his own household didn’t know where he went!
If I were Lens, I’d be a smidgen worried.
Of course, she was so, so much more worried than that.
She started asking random ponies if they’d seen Rez, but she got few responses that were relevant to his location. There was one couple that said they’d seen him a few days back at his stand, but that was all she could manage to gather up.
This concluded with her speeding about Ponyville and checking every public place, including the park three times, but all to no avail. The two places she hadn’t gone so far included a local pub and the hospital, neither of which she wanted to check.
Had Rez been in the pub, he’d likely be blasted out of his mind from alcohol. She’d learned, the hard way, not to take him to the pub again. One horrid memory and a shudder later, she then developed a frown as to why she wouldn’t want to investigate the hospital. If Rez was in there, then she would feel pretty bad for not having been around to stop whatever nasty thing had occurred to him. She wouldn’t feel right after that, so she felt it best to just not check.
In a relatively desolate cave illuminated only by dimly-glowing crystals, many ponies chat amongst themselves and pass loot around. A great number of them are clad in varying armor, some looking more durable or expensive than others, and some not even having armor at all. Ponies of many shapes, types and sizes wander about, ranging from a small Pegasus filly to a hulking earth pony with more than twice the normal proportions.
This unusual meeting would draw the eyes of many, which explains why it was in a cave. Why meet, though? What is their purpose? Do they have a motive that inspires this meeting?
Calm down and let me explain.
See, each and every one of these ponies is part of a thieves’ guild. Each one has their own sob story of why they want money, or how their family is or was poor, or other sad junk like that.
To make a short story long, each of these ponies were contacted by a mysteriously dark-clad pony who would disappear as swiftly as appearing, leaving only a note for them. Each and every one of these ponies read that note, which detailed a time and place. At this place at the specified time, the pony would normally show up and be confronted by the stranger once more. They get invited to the guild, guild stuff, blah blah, happy ending. Right? Riiiiiight.
Anyhow, each time and place is always different as to avoid run-ins with other guild members in public. Most of those happenstances are either by accident or are pre-planned, and when they’re planned, they are never with good intention. Most public guild meetings are for massive raids.
These raids aren’t held often, but they’re held often enough for ponies of most upbringings to know the name of the guild. Known only as ‘Silver Plague,’ these ponies are supposedly ‘fast as lightning’ and ‘strike with deadly precision.’ Several other accounts and sightings of these thieves reports similar qualities, such a- Okay, know what? Enough side explanation. Let’s get back to the matter at hand. Hoof. What? The matter at ‘hoof.’ Ponies don’t have hands. …oh. Let’s get back to the matter at hand hoof. That’s better.
Anyhow, after a few minutes of idle chit-chat and minor quarreling, a pony clad in all black stood on a podium of sorts, then cleared his throat.
“Everyone, could I have your attention please? Everyone, attention!” The pony called out above the voices of the other ponies, quickly making its presence known with its deceptively cheery tone. All the ponies began to turn to see the speaker, some of which had to be nudged or ‘shushed’ to cause them to be quiet and turn.
“Ah, good. Now that I have your attention, I can imagine you’re all curious as to why I called you here…” The pony stood and surveyed the crowd for a moment, a black hood hiding its unidentified face. “Well, I’m curious too, seeing as I didn’t.” Many ponies looked back and forth amongst themselves, obviously confused. “Don’t you worry, everypony. I know most of you are likely confused.. well, all except him..” the black-clad pony motioned to a wall opposite to it, where a metallic figure was leaning up against the wall. “STATEMENT: CORRECT.” A robotic voice toned, drawing the attention of many ponies. “CONTINUE.”
Pausing for just a moment, the black-clad pony continued, “Er… right. Well, anyway, I know most of you are confused, but I know somepony who can relieve that confusion! Give it up for… Grandmaster Lotus!”
A black-armor-with-gold-trim-clad pony appeared next to the shadowy pony, causing some ponies to gasp or jump from surprise.
A distinctively feminine voice spoke, “Welcome, one and all, to this meeting of the Silver Plague.” The Grandmaster spoke, then reaching up to remove her helmet. Upon removal, a silky pink mane, blue coat, and glimmering aqua eyes. With a devilish smirk, she spoke, “Now that everypony’s here, we can begin.”
Rez awoke to… an unfamiliar texture. It was not the roughness of the cast he had previously experienced, nor was it the softness of the bed he’d been laying on.
He felt neither of those things.
This initially sparked a mild thought of panic, but that quickly subsided as he had not fully gained consciousness yet. He would first focus on waking up, and then he could panic.
He did exactly that.
After gaining his consciousness, Rez immediately tried to summon up his magic sight. No headaches presented themselves, so that was a good sign, but it caused Rez to question how long he’d been out. It felt like it’d only been the day before that he was completely disabled, yet he felt much better today…
As his ‘vision’ came into ‘view,’ many things became apparent to him.
For starters, he was in a plain, white room with a white ceiling and white walls. Next up, he realized the familiar beeping of the machine that was once next to him had now halted. He turned his head, noting that he was now capable of such a feat, and ‘looked’ to his side. Only a wall resided beside him.
Turning over and facing right, he noticed he had no cast around his limbs, and saw nothing except a pillow and the wall on the other side of the room.
Wherever he was, it certainly wasn’t the hospital.
Lens had come to the conclusion that Hi-Rez was not in Ponyville.
He wasn’t in ANY place I checked that he WOULD have been, so where could he have gone? She thought, pacing about, her hooves gently clacking against the wooden floor.
In-between now and the time we saw them last, the Cap family had settled into a house not-too-far from the border of Ponyville, as per Lens’ request. Also during that time, Lens had taken it upon herself to look in literally every nook and cranny in Ponyville, even if that meant checking the pubs or bars… or the hospital.
She hadn’t found him in any of those places.
He… he didn’t just abandon me, did he? she thought, a sadness welling up inside of her. Oh, I hope he didn’t! That would just… I wouldn’t know what to say… would he even consider doing that? No, Lens, you’re being silly! Stop thinking such silly things and just focus on the positive.
She took on a confident look and fought the sadness away, but quickly crumpled onto her bed.
Who was she kidding? There was no way Rez had remembered her, or he would have still been in Ponyville when she got back. In fact, not even his own parents knew where he went.
Tears began rolling down her cheeks. She attempted to wipe them away and force the offending thought from her mind, but both returned just as swiftly.
Now that she really gave it thought, if he had bothered to care, he could at least have told her where he was going. At base minimum, it would have been right to send her a letter or a message of some sorts, letting her know he would be out of town. That, at base minimum, would have been acceptable… or at least, that’s what Lens thought.
No, that’s just overreaction. He’d totally bother to leave some sort of notification, unless anything happened to him… but even then, his parents would know where he went…
…right?
The emotionally distraught Lens Cap bawled into her bed late into the night.
“Well, everypony, I’m sure you’re all wondering why I gathered you here today…” Grandmaster Lotus began, taking a pause for dramatic effect.
Everypony was silent as they hung on her words, just waiting for what she might say next.
Well, what she said next shocked many and disturbed many others.
“We’re here to coordinate a raid.” She said with a wicked grin that only a demon could rival.
Cheers practically exploded from the audience. Lotus swore she went deaf for a moment, but continued on, seeming unfazed.
“Now, before we get too over-excited,” she practically shouted, needing to raise her voice over those of the crowd. After several seconds, the cheering and roaring of the crowd died down. “We need to start strategizing. Our first target, of course, will be…” Lotus paused again.
Two other ponies scuttled onstage, holding a large, rolled-up piece of parchment. They got up on two equal-sized ladders and held it out, then unrolled it and revealed a large map.
“…Ponyville.”
Thunderous applause boomed from the crowd, threatening to topple the ladders and ground the two ponies supporting the parchment.
Rez took a good look around, prodding at the mysteriously soft walls with his hooves and curiously poking about the room. Its texture was strangely comforting, yet something about it felt quite off.
From wall to wall, the room was twelve hooves in any direction. Rez pondered if there was anything else in the roo-
THUNK!
The entire room shook and rattled, sending Rez off his hooves and onto the floor. His eyes flicked about in a panic as he attempted to steady himself, but then the entire room lurched to the left, flinging him into the opposing wall.
Thankfully, the soft padding encompassing the room prevented harm.
What it didn't prevent, however, was the instilling of panic.
Rez did exactly that.
He panicked and charged about the room, searching for any sign of an exit or way out in any possible, conceivable way. He found none. In light of this, he decided to try his hoof at blasting an exit into existance.
Without further thought, Rez channeled magic into his horn and closed his eyes. The strange ‘veins’ in his mane and tail began to glow and spark, sending bits of energy this way and that. His hair began to react as though it hadn’t any gravity at all. He could practically feel power coursing through his body, but he paid no mind to that. Right now, he had an exit to make.
He then focused that energy into a forward beam… but that wasn’t what he got.
At first, he opened his eyes and was disappointed. A small sphere of, what appeared to be, light floated in front of his face.
Two guardponies stood watch as a third raced towards them, something in tow. Unsure of what it was, they were about to stop to question the pony, but they stopped themselves from stopping the pony and just went with the flow. They turned around and looked over their vehicle, which basically looked like a gigantic metal box with wheels and doors.
They quickly ran to the back and opened two doors in the rear of the vehicle, revealing a white room inside.
The first pony hurled the object into the white room, then swiftly shutting the doors and signaling for the guards to move. They hurriedly turned and jumped into the vehicle, starting it then punching it away from the scene.
No more than twelve seconds passed before the third pony, left standing at the location the other two had just departed from, had heard an explosion of tremendous proportions.
Rez rubbed his head and wiped his eyes, brushing soot and smoldering cinders from his eyelids. He shook himself off and took a glance around, making quick note that he was standing in a small crater which appeared to be filled with the remainder of whatever he'd been previously occupying. Two ponies lay on the road further from him, both of which were coated in the same ash and cinders as he. Neither appeared injured, but Rez wouldn't have given it any rational thought anyhow.
He was too busy being in a panic.
He had been in the hospital only moments before he awoke in the white room, then he detonated it like a stick of dynamite with a cardboard box, and now he was unsure of what exactly the circumstances were surrounding his situation.
So, like any normal idiot, he turned to run.
Then ran straight into a tree... which wasn't a tree at all. It was a massive, angry-looking stallion who seemed to have taken one-too-many doses of testosterone.
