It's All Downhill from Here
It was a night like no other at the Crystal Empire. Well, atleast a night for four certain individuals. It was a night meant for fun and merriment as the wives had a night away while the husbands hung out and played.
Cadance and Twilight were at a local art and literature exhibition. Something Twilight had been excited to see for quite some time, and the fact she was getting to spend her visit with her sister-in-law made it all the greater. Especially as they innocently used their princess authority to gain a nighttime visit.
Cadance and Twilight were looking over some art by a pony named "Mareiangelo.
Twilight was indeed excited as she examined every detail of the painting, noting the amazing coloring and attention to detail. Cadance was smiling. She was just happy to see Twilight so happy. It was a good time for them, with good feels to be had as they took the time to examine and talk about everything they came across.
Of course, given that their husbands were not with them. Twilight had also started to feel a few concerns about the night as well.
Twilight looked up at Cadance with concern as they traveled the halls of the museum. "Cadance, are you sure it was ok for them not to come with us?"
Cadance smiled at her with a whimsical dismissive look in her face "Twilight relax, I don't think
Anon or Shining would have want to come anyway. Besides, you've been looking forward to this for awhile. So don't let a little worry ruin it for you"
Twilight frowned and looked down " I know but, I guess I'm afraid things might not work out. Anon can be a little odd."
Cadance giggled "Odd enough that you still married him. Twilight...relax, trust me. I'm sure Anon can handle himself. Besides...Shining can be quite odd too, so I'm sure they are going to be the best of friends!"
Twilight gave her a small smile "you're...yeah you're probably right"
Meanwhile, in the basement of the Crystal Castle.
"Darnit Shining, you can't have your pony paladin crit against my stallion knight, that's not how it's done!" You point at him, and then at the dice, holding out a skill sheet.
"Anon, pony paladins can crit like any other class. You'd know that if you played more" Shining looked into your eyes with dead seriousness. He was much more well versed in the game than you were. But you were persistent, you were sure you were right. "Yeah, they can crit the undead. Just because you rolled a perfect twenty doesn't mean jack squat!" You cross your arms.
Shining uses his magic to hold up his skill sheet "I can if I have the "Crusader" skill active! Come on Anon, it's basic stuff, i've been playing this game for years, before you even came to Equestria."
You point at him, baring your fangs "Yeah but did you actually activate the skill?"
Shining backs off a little, looking left and right "I....I think I did...wait...no..I did, like five turns ago"
Your eye twitches "WHAT?! That skill only lasts for two turns and you know it!"
Shining gives you an arrogant smile "But I'm wearing full paladin armor with an amulet of lasting, making it last for a full five turns..."
You sigh, slamming your hands on the board "Screw that, I call shenanigans...Get me the rule book!"
Shining almost slams the rulebook into your hands as he starts checking his own copy "Sure, you're just going to see how right I am!"
You both begin reading through the rulebooks thoroughly.
You scoff "You know, why don't you just brush up on your skills by playing this with Cadance?"
Shining sighs "....ehmm..well....she never wants to play...and hey...what about you? I thought you and Twily played this game?"
You gulp and hide your head in the book "we...we...did....once..."
Shining sounded surprised "Once? What happened? Why once?"
You groaned "Something about this game causing fights and ruining friendships or something like that...Also I chucked her character in a lava pit for a sandwich"
Shining raised his head from the book and looked at you with a dismissive look "That's kinda ridiculous."
You give him almost the same look "I know right?....now keep looking so you can see how wrong you are!"
Meanwhile, back at the museum
"....it's just that Anon can be irresponsible sometimes." Twilight said as she was reading an info kiosk on a Starswhirl book.
"Irresponsible? Twilight..he never...cheated on you has he?" Cadance was feeling concerned, hoping that wasn't the reason that her sister-in-law was feeling anxious.
Twilight looked at her and shook her head "No!no,no,no! he's never done that. He's actually really sweet and kind when he wants to be, and he never ever does..or tries not to anyway...to do anything to hurt my feelings. But sometimes he gets these hair-brained schemes and...."
Cadance softly shooshed her "shhhh..Twilight, if you're worried about any crazy stuff then don't worry. You know your brother is the epitome of responsible. He'll make sure he doesn't do anything bad ok?"
Twilight nodded with a smile "Of course, I knew that! I'm sure he'd never let him do anything that might get himself hurt"
Meanwhile, at the castle
Both you and Shining stand before a peculiar mirror in a room somewhere within the castle.
"So that's the mirror Twilight told you about? Takes you to my world or something?" You point at it, feeling unsure.
Shining nodded "Yeah, that's the one.It's weird though. Twily's version of your world sounds a lot nicer than the way you told it."
"Considering what I heard, about skin tones...other versions of her friends...and Celestia knows what else. I don't think that's exactly my world either. I've told her that much...And I know I didn't appear here through a mirror...why are we here anyway?" You rubbed your chin
Shining looked at you, he seemed nervous "Well...I've been kinda curious about this since I heard the stories. I mean, I never jumped in because, you know...duty and all. But...the girls did say to have fun. And they even had me send away the other guards so we wouldn't be bothered...the portal opens every thirty moons..and well....you know..."
You continued to rub your chin, staring at the mirror "You just want to take a peek, huh? Man Shining, and here I thought Cadance had you whipped"
Shining gruffed "Come on, don't say that. I love her with all my heart, but even I get curious about these kinda things...so do you wanna..?"
You think about it for a moment. Would be interesting to see if you were wrong and see the human world again for a little while. What could possibly go wrong? "Yeah sure whatever, we can get back here easily right?"
Shining nodded "Yeah, apparently we just come back the way we came..easy stuff"
You nod "Alrighty then, let's uhh....do we walk in?..jump in?...I dunno..."
After a moment of decision making, you both decide to jump in as both of you are briefly blinded by a white light before appearing in front of a high school.
Shining almost trips over, managing to stand on his two burly legs. He looked quite the stunning man in his sudden red blazer and blue jeans. Quite buff with perfectly groomed hair.
He was astonished by the new sights around him. He looked at his hands as he wiggled his fingers "Woah, this is really weird"
He tried walking, and remarkably, he could do it quite well. He was even smiling as he got into it. But as he started to get into the groove, many people started to stare at him....and they kept increasing in number. "What the...?"
Suddenly, he notices you aren't around and quickly looks for you. He can suddenly hear you screaming. But he just couldn't see you "Where are you?!" he yelled.
That's when he noticed. He looked down to see a furless crippled looking pony, with just a mane "GAHHHSHININGHELLPPAHHHHICAN'TFEELMYFINGERSAHHHHHH!ORMYTOESAHHH!"
Shining started yelling "AHHHHOLYCELESTIAANONYOU'REAPONYNOWAHHHH!
You look up at him screaming "AHHHHDOIATLEASTLOOKMANLY?!AHHHH"
He just looks down upon you in horror "NOMANYOULOOKFREAKYAHHHHH"
You scream "NOOOAHHHITHOUGHTI'DLOOKFUCKABLEAHHH!"
He screams "YOUDON'TAHHHH"
"AHHHHHH"
"AHHHHHH"
"AHHHHHHH!"
At the museum
"Twilight" Cadance giggled "I have a silly question."
Twilight smiled at her "What is it?"
Cadance looked up, in wonderment "Well, who do you think would win in a fight? Shining Armor or Anon?""
Twilight gasped "Cadance! That's such a bad question...why would you even ask that?"
Cadance giggled at her "Come on Twilight, you never thought about it once since we got here? Personally, I'd put my bits on Shining, unless Anon has some secret powers I don't know about."
Twilight giggled "No,not really. Which is why I'd also bet on Shining"
Cadance eyed Twilight and gave her a sly smile "ohhhhh Twilight, that's so cold"
Twilight looked away "Well....A-anon just isn't a very good fighter, he's pretty smart though. I bet him and Shining would make a great team"
Cadance nodded "He did seem pretty smart"
Meanwhile, back at the mirror room
You were on the ground, kissing and hugging the floor as you nuzzled your face with your fingers "ohh....ohhh...beautiful fingers, ehrjgheuosjdos..." You almost began to spasm.
Shining was leaning behind you, he had blood on his front hooves "Let's...never...do...that...again..." he was panting.
You were just hugging the ground, wiggling your toes. "A-agreed...geez, my back hurts. Why did that guy have to drop me on my back."
Shining turned and looked at you "because you peed in his face when he picked you up
You exclaim "Man! I was scared man! I was like a little pony...well..I WAS a little pony. I'm scared of heights. He shouldn't have picked me up!...ngh" you roll over to your backside, hoping some pressure from the floor would help it. "And geez, you went into him the moment I twitched and squealed on the ground."
Shining started to use magic to make the blood vanish from his hooves "I...I dunno what that was. The moment you got hurt, I felt like. I felt like he hurt you on purpose. You're family, y'know? I....I just lost it."
"awww,....that's pretty sweet" You smile as you flinch in pain "Did you even get the guy's name?"
Shining looked up "I think it was Brad...or Flash...or something.."
Meanwhile, at the museum.
Twilight and Cadance are examining books in the literature exhibit.
"Twilight, maybe you should make Anon your royal guard captain." Cadance was eyeing a book.
Twilight shook her head "I don't need any royal guardponies...or humans. I can handle myself"
Cadance turned and smiled at her "Come on Twilight, Wouldn't he look adorable in a set of armor? Protecting his princess with his love?"
Twilight blushed "W-what are you talking about? H-he already is cute the way he is!"
Cadance giggled "Twilight, you're fun to tease sometimes.....so, cute the way he is huh? But what if danger did come knocking on your door. He'd be with you throughout it, right?"
Twilight nodded "Of course, he'd never abandon me ever! That, i'm sure of. He's loyal to a fault!"
Meanwhile, through the halls of the castle. A sudden stealth attack by changelings had occured.
You were hiding in the closet of Cadance and Shining's bedroom. You could hear Shining screaming in fear just outside the door as he was being sexually molested by the queen of the changelings. Given the passing of dialogue between them, it seemed she had grown a taste for his brand of love. And it seemed he didn't even remember any of it due to hypnosis shenanigans.
You held your head as you could hear moans, mischievous giggling from the queen, and Shining screaming for help. You didn't want none of this. Whatever this was, this was his problem.
Suddenly he starts screaming your name specifically, and mentions of a closet. You begin to shiver hard. You couldn't make it out. But surely he didn't....oh crap, the door opened. And Queen Chrysalis was looking at you with a very sly smile "Well well, such odd things we keep in the closet."
You yelp in fright and quickly reach for a weapon. "Y-you don't scare me! P-p-prepare to be defeated by my mighty human muscles and m-my..." You pull out a spatula like a sword "A-and MY SPATULA!....what...a spatula? WHO KEEPS A SPATULA IN A CLOSET?! WHAT KIND OF SICK CRAP ARE YOU INTO SHINING?! oh well...TAKE THIS!"
You throw the spatula at the queen, who looks unamused as she zaps and disintegrates it before it even reaches her face.
You gulp and look at her "Look, I'm just a victim of circumstance. You want Shining right? I'll just y'know. Stay here and...umm...play with my spatula particles...yeah...heh....heh.."
She smiles evilly at you "I could do that, but now you have me curious as to what "mighty human muscles" taste like~, especially a certain...particular...muscle~"
You gulp as she slowly approaches you.
blabla museum bla
Cadance was feeling tired "Twilight, how are you feeling?"
Twilight was losing quite a bit of energy herself. She had speedread quite a few books in the library and she was absolutely pooped "I'm feeling kind of tired actually..."
Cadance nodded "Yeah me too, you want to call it a night and head back to the castle?"
Twilight nodded and smiled "Yeah....hehe, I can't wait to hear about how well the night went for Shining and Anon!"
Cadance smiled "I can't either, I bet they had as much fun as we did!"
Meanwhile, in the bedroom of the castle
You were in a corner, naked, shaking, shivering,crying. Shining was in another corner, doing the same.
The changelings were gone, but the unspeakable horrors they left behind lingered.
"S-s-s-s-hining...I..I don't...fee....f-f-f-feel like a man...a-a-a-anymore" you stuttered
Shining rocked back and forth in horror "I-I....know"
"Sh-she-she made...u-u-us..kiss...a-a-and...touch our peepees together" You rocked back and forth
Shining looked out of his mind "I-I-I know"
You fell over "T-t-then she...m-m-made me....do her...w-w-while...y-y-you did me"
Shining began to hide his face in his hooves "I-i know"
"A-and...all..w-while making u-us wat-watch..." and you say this with complete dread "H-home movies...Wh-why did she ma-make us watch them? She-she can't even s-s-sing Winter W-wrap U-up that well..........the horror...why...Shining...W-why?"
Shining just looked at you, emptiness in his eyes. "I know"
"No you don't Shining. Apologize to the poor man for lying, he's been through a lot." Chrysalis snickers as she stretches on the bed, it seems she had not left like the others, and made herself comfy on the bed.
Shining looked at you "S-Sorry Anon"
You looked at him with dreaded eyes "It's o-ok Sh-shining"
Chrysalis got up and opened a window "Well boys, I had my fun. You should be alone more often~, we could have more fun together~" And she flew off into the moonlight.
After sometime, the girls walk into the room. They had been looking for the both of you in urgency when they noticed damage around the castle. They both look at you and shining's drained forms with astonished stunned looks and both yell if you both are alright.
You slowly get up, and walk towards Twilight, and place your hands on the top of her back as you bring your face towards hers with an extremely serious look on your face, then you silently say "Twilight....Spatulas....do not make good weapons, THEY DON’T MAKE GOOD WEAPONS TWILIGHT! AND HORSE ASS IS GROSS! OH...SO….g-gross"
You fall over, falling unconscious in a state of shock.
The following days would be difficult for both you and Shining. As you both had to hide away the fact of sexy bad stuffs that had gone on that night. Things would never be the same for the both of you mentally ever again.As you both grew a paranoia to Bugs,Spatulas, and mirrors. And sex became incredibly awkward. And you both couldn't pass by pony flash sentry without secretly tying him up in a bag and beating on him without him ever being able to look at who his captors were. The queen had ruined both your lives....for at least a week anyway. Everypony seems to reset after a week
THE END