Our Town

by Silver Inkwell

First published

Twilight asks Starlight Glimmer what the name of her town is. Chaos and Confusion ensue.

Twilight asks Starlight Glimmer what the name of her town is. Chaos and Confusion ensue.

Note: Based on Who's On First?

Our Town

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Our Town

Twilight Sparkle was very suspicious of the town that the castle map had sent them to at first but she still had no proof that anything bad or evil was happening… yet… But maybe having a talk with the town leader would clear that up. The ponies slowly (and creepily) took them to the house of their leader called Starlight Glimmer. “We have no idea what monster could come through that door!” Rainbow Dash said once they got inside and saw a door opening up.

But then suddenly a bright purplish mare stepped forward to greet them.

“Well hello there, my name is Starlight Glimmer and welcome to Our Town!”

“Hi there, my name’s Princess Twilight Sparkle, princess of magic and friendship, these are my friends Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity, and Fluttershy as well, how we came here is a rather long story that I won't bore the details of it to you, but your town looks very nice and orderly, but what’s the name of it?”

“It’s Our Town,” Starlight said.

“Yes, I know that it’s your town, but what’s the name of it?”

“Our Town.”

“Look, you already said that, what’s the name of your town.

“Our Town.”

“Look,” Twilight said while all the others started to scratch their heads in confusion, even Pinkie Pie who had a grin and smile on her face as she tried not to laugh, “I don't think you understand me.”

“Oh, I do” Starlight said, “It’s you that’s the one that doesn't understand me.”

“Okay then, you do know what a name is supposed to be and represent and mean, right?” Twilight said.

“Yeah, duh, of course, after all, I have a name.”

“Okay then, let’s try this again, my name is Twilight Sparkle and you are?”

“Starlight Glimmer, but I already said that,” the mare said getting very annoyed.

“Yes, now then, what’s the name of your town.”

“Our Town.”

Twilight took a very deep breath in, “Okay, calm down, let’s try this again. What’s the name of your town?”

“Our Town,” she said.

"Yes, I already know that it’s your town because you practically made this from the ground up from what I hear from the local ponies.”

“Yes, I did, but this is not just my town, it’s Our Town.”

“I still don't get it; can you try saying your town’s name in a declarative sentence?” she said.

Starlight sighed, “Well okay, fine then, my town is Our Town.”

“Your town can't be our town because our town is Ponyville!”

“I’m not saying that Our Town is Ponyville because it’s not, Our Town is our town,” she said.

Twilight banged her head on a wall.

“Okay, let’s keep trying this, what is the name of your town?”

“Our Town.”

“And your town is not Ponyville, correct?”

“Right.”

“So therefore, it can't be my town, right?”

“Yes.”

“Then that would mean that your town is not our town?”

“No. It is.”

“Okay, now you’ve just lost me again.”

“Don't worry, you’ll get it eventually, don't worry,” Starlight said.

“Well okay, fine then, let’s keep trying this, my town is Ponyville, what’s your town called?”

“Our Town.”

“What’s the name of your town?”

“It’s Our Town.”

“You’ve already said that!”

“Well only because you can't understand what the name of my town is?”

“So is your town called my town?”

“NO! It’s not my town or Ponyville, it’s Our Town!!!”

“Oh, so it’s our town?” Twilight said.

“Yes, in capital letters,” Starlight said.

“Oh, so wait, your town is literally called Our Town then?” Twilight said then.

Starlight sighed. “Finally, you get it, yes, our town is Our Town.”

“Okay then, now I’m confused and still don't get it, but just to make sure, your town is Our Town, but Our Town is not Ponyville because our home town is Ponyville which is different from Our Town and Our Town is your town but also their town which means that Our Town is literally your town then?”

“Uh, yes?” Starlight said.

Twilight nodded, “Okay then, I think that I get it, okay, everypony, welcome to ‘Our Town’, a very stupid name by the way,” she said.

“Hey, it’s not my fault that I wanted a bland town name.”

“Well at least we know the name of your town.”

“Yeah, but there’s still one thing that I don't understand,” Pinkie Pie said.

“What?”

“How come Our Town isn't your town if our town is your town which also just happens to be Our Town?”

“Pinkie Pie, you just lost me.”

“Yeah, me too,” Starlight said.

“Okay, never mind that, why is your town Our Town?”

“Because I named it.”

“But why Our Town then?”

“I’ trying to create equality here princess Twilight, something that you wouldn’t really understand since you’re so much better then every pony else.”

“I’m not better than any pony else.”

“Says the princess of magic and friendship herself.”

“Yeah, but there’s still one thing that I don't understand.”

“What Pinkie Pie?”

“Who’s on first?”

“What?”

“No, he’s on second, who’s on first.”

“I don't know.”

“No, he’s on third, but who’s on first.”

“I don't get it.”

“No, he’s the shortstop,”

“What’s happening right now?”

“Oh, he’s the pitcher.”

“Are we talking about hoof ball right now?” Twilight said.

“Yep.”

“Then why don't you know who’s on first?”

“No, I already know who’s on first, I’m just asking you if you already knew who’s on first,” she said.

“No, I don't know who’s on first because I don't follow hoof ball.”

“Oh, that’s too and, but my question is just like Our Town, it makes no sense and it’s very funny in the end because it’s just completely random!”

“Uh, well okay then,” Twilight said.

“Do you ever really understand her?” Starlight said.

“Sometimes,” Twilight said as Pinkie Pie suddenly turned towards the screen.

“Hey, the reader is on Page One, that’s not fair! But where’s the audience?

Are they reading this? If they are then they’re on the story!”

Starlight looked very confused, “What-?”

Twilight used her favorite motto, “It’s Pinkie Pie, don't question it.”