For amusement's sake: crack pairings never before done!
Shipping. Shipping the never before shipped! After the end of Season Two, the mane six enjoy a cruise and along the way meet six unusual partners...! - - - No OCs. The challenge is in shipping something not seen before, is it not?! Don't bother checking the character list either. I won't spoil the identities there. Maybe when all the chapters are done and online. Maybe.
We all know that something like half of all ponyfics are venues for shipping. Er. Probably. Don't quote me on that, but it sure seems like a whole lot of em are shipping fics, usually among the mane cast themselves: Pinkie and Dash, Fluttershy and Dash, Twilight and Dash, Dash and another Dash, Dash and everything and everything and Big Mac. Plus occasionally Fluttershy and a straightjacket and Rarity being a MILF/Cougar. All of which can be amusing, but I wanted to do something cracky with pairings nopony would ever expect.
So here we go! Please don't take this stuff too seriously. It's just for fun.
- - - (1) The Sparkle - - -
The words Eros Dreaming were written in pony-sized letters across the ship's prow.
It was, without a doubt, the largest airship Twilight Sparkle had ever laid eyes on. The great vessel seemed to stretch on and on, the colossal nose jutting out from the end of the dock and the wide flank bathing in the ocean. A pony could probably cram half the buildings in Ponyville into it. In fact, if she had time to do the math, it was likely the entire town could occupy the massive vessel's volume.
Even from the train, approaching slowly along the coast, she could see the leviathan towering over the nearby docks and piers. Titanic booms - the rigid skeletal airframe of the flight balloon - soon blotted out the sky as the train pulled into the ship’s harbor. It was an artificial canopy of blue and yellow, the latter color added on to make sure no birds or pegasi flew into it out of disorientation. Moored between the twin zeppelins was a ship-like body, the cabin.
On the very tip of that cabin, on the prow, were those pony-sized words.
"Woo-wee! I can't say ah've ever seen anythin' quite so huge!" Applejack remarked, keeping a hoof on the edge of her hat. The berthed ship was large enough to trap the wind against it, making the dockside breezier that one would expect for a clear and cloudless afternoon.
"You can say that again!" Dash had to restrain herself from taking to the air to get a look from up high. "This thing makes dragons look tiny!"
"Speaking of dragons... excuse me, darling, could you...?" Rarity struggled to keep her luggage from spilling out of the dolly it rested on. The task was proving more difficult than pulling a cart full of gemstones; the pretty white unicorn had packed as much as the rest of her friends put together. Flexing just a bit of magic to tighten one of the straps on her half dozen bags, she breathed a sigh of relief.
"As I was saying," she began again. "Speaking of dragons, I do hope Spike has no problems staying with my parents. He seemed very adamant that he could be left to tend to the library."
"Spike never did like baby-sitters," Twilight said with a rueful sigh. "He's getting old enough I was actually tempted to let him take care of things for the next two weeks, but then again... two weeks is a long time. I'm sure he'd get lonely. Even if he wouldn't admit it later."
"Your folks always seemed like stand-up types, Rarity," Applejack reminded her. "Plus, they do have that spare room..."
"Yes, my old room," Rarity said it with a trace of unhappiness.
"You don't have any weird stuff in there, do you?" Pinkie asked, giggling. "Like old magazines hidden under the bed?"
"You don't, do you?" Twilight asked, more concerned than joking.
"Most certainly not!" Rarity objected, waving a dismissive hoof at her friends. "Why I never!" In a more quiet voice, she explained, "I took all those with me when I moved out years ago."
"Things'll be fine in Ponyville without us, just fer a little while," Applejack assured them, starting towards the docked ship and the harbor's boarding terminal. She had two large saddlebags on her sides, each bearing a large red apple design. "Ah can't wait fer the All Equestria Apple Conference ta begin! It'll be a real hoot!"
"And I'm gonna party every night and every-other morning!" Pinkie bounced along behind Applejack, a heart shaped bag strapped to her back. "Parties on the lido deck, parties in hot tubs, parties in pools, parties in night clubs, parties in bars, parties in ball rooms... parties from one end of the ship to the other!"
Fluttershy followed quietly behind, pulling her large rolling hold-all with one wing. A large camera hung from around her neck.
"It'll be cool to relax and hit a few clubs," Rainbow Dash agreed, toting her black dufflebag over her shoulder as she slowly flew by. It bore a single rainbow-stripe and hardly seemed like it could have enough to last two weeks on a first class cruise. At least by Twilight's reckoning. A week's worth of casual clothes was all but required since her books on cruises indicated many parts of the ship would have dress codes.
"Rarity, you need a little help with that...?"
"Thank you so much, Twilight. I didn't over pack, did I?"
"It never hurts to be prepared," Twilight said, levitating a corner of the dolly so she could pull while Rarity pushed.
The boarding terminal was a large, open atrium area with pictures of the ocean along the walls and up to the glass ceiling. Whales breached and exotic creatures frolicked among the sea-grass. The mural was only really broken by booths selling snacks or magazines and a few large pictures of the airship itself in flight. A trio of cart-sized fans did their best to keep the waiting lines of ponies cool, the spinning blades still making less noise than the two or three screaming foals some couple had brought with them.
Showing their first class passes to a security pony, the six mares were ushered to a shorter boarding line. Applejack was here for the convention, all expenses paid, but the rest of them had gotten their tickets from the Princess thanks to an otherwise uneventful friendship report a few weeks back. Twilight had mentioned being interested in going along to experience something new and the next day Spike had coughed up five first class tickets! It was probably spoiling them, but the tickets had come with a note.
A note that said, simply: You've earned a vacation! Have fun!
To Rarity's relief, a trio of ushers appeared to help them with their bags (the loser of a quick rock-paper-scissors match being stuck with her collection of luggage). Then it was just across the boarding ramp and into the ship itself. Inside, the girls were greeted by the latest in Equestrian design and technology, starting with a lovely little processing center. Their tickets punched and recorded, they were ushered up to a vaunted concourse and atrium, three stories high and lined with shops and resturants. The main elevators, disguised behind and within terracotta sunburst sculptures, were a boon when it came to getting all their luggage up to their rooms.
A luxurious suite of personal rooms welcomed them, each one with a private bath and lavatory, princess-sized bed and large glass window-wall overlooking the side of the ship. The current view wasn't very impressive: just the docks far below, but Twilight could imagine how it would look when they were airborne. A complimentary basket of sweets, an activity sheet, and a map of the ship lay on her bed.
An overly enthusiastic knock on one of the doors prompted Twilight to investigate.
"Um.. hello?" she asked, unlocking and opening the door.
"Ohmygosh! Hiya Twilight!" Pinkie blasted through the moment it was unlocked, virtually bowling over the poor unicorn. "You'll never guess what!"
"What?" she deadpanned.
"My room has a door connecting it to your room!" Pinkie explained, raising a hoof as if this were some revelation and not completely and totally obvious by this point. "We can be immediately-adjacent room buddies!"
"Uh. Right."
A knocking from the door opposite elicited a groan from the librarian. "Don't tell me..."
Pinkie zipped over and unlocked the door, gasping at what she saw.
"Dashie!"
"Pinkie! Guess what!"
"What!"
"I've got a door that connects to Twilight's room!"
"Wow! Me too!"
Still lying on the carpeted floor, Twilight groaned and rolled her eyes. Of all the rooms on the largest ship in the world...
- - -
Peace and Quiet!
The normally distant, gentle hum of the Eros Dreaming's engines was little more than an innocuous whisper in the ship’s library and observatory. Night had settled on the ship as it roared out of its berth late in the afternoon, but that initial drone had quickly and thankfully muted as the ship's lift system kept it airborne. They were now over a thousand pony-lengths in the air, moving slowly over the dark sea below.
Up in the ship's observatory, the ocean wasn't a point of interest.
Twilight Sparkle gazed into the telescope, smiling to herself at how clear the night sky was. Altitude was the astronomer's ally, and so too was isolation from meddlesome light pollution. The ship's observation studio was built into the rear of the mid-castle, while most of the revelers were partying on the front. It was a perfect place to scan the heavens.
A bronze orrery mechanism ticked away in the center of the suite, but Twilight was otherwise alone. The only real annoyance was a window that had been left open and rigged so it couldn't be closed. It didn't result in much noise, but it was letting in air that was definitely a few degrees beneath comfortable room temperature. It had been that way since she entered, too.
Returning to her telescope, Twilight privately wondered why her friends hadn't joined her. It was a perfect night, and who knew how long the skies would be clear once they hit wilder patches of weather down south and by the islands. Pinkie had wasted no time convincing Rainbow Dash to go with her to a party on the front deck of the ship; Rarity and Fluttershy had availed themselves of a massage parlor, and Applejack had turned in early to prepare for the start of the convention tomorrow.
A soft clop-clop sound came from the other side of the observatory, but not from the stairwell. The sound came from the open window. Curiously turning her head, the studious unicorn saw a flash of blue wings as a pegasus came to a cantering landing. He walked nimbly over to a table next to an expansive star chart, checked something, and headed back out.
"Excuse me," Twilight spoke up, catching him just as he was climbing back out the window.
The pegasus paused, looking back over his shoulder at her. "Oh, hey."
"You left this window open?" she asked and he nodded. "Why? Can't you just use the stairs or...?"
The stallion grinned broadly, caught in the act and a little embarrassed for it.
"Sorry!" he quickly apologized, "but it's the only way to get up top from here and I didn't want to get locked out."
"The top?" Twilight walked closer, her violet eyes examining the ceiling. There wasn't anything above the observatory... except...
"You mean the roof?" she asked.
"You bet!" he replied, wings flapping as he slipped out the window.
"What's up there that's worth all this trouble?"
"A whole wide-open night sky," he answered, chuckling at the question. "Maybe it's just me, but I'd rather not have a roof over my head when I stargaze."
"Oh, I see." Twilight reached the window herself and stuck her head out to look up with the naked eye. The blue pegasus fluttered back to give her room. The wind was a bit chilly, but refreshing in a way, too, as it ruffled her mane. The sky overhead was clear, like she had enjoyed before, but now she could see a great expanse of it with nothing in the way.
"You want to try it?"
Twilight blinked, turning to the pegasus. "It?"
"Checking things out from up on the roof?" he asked, holding out a hoof. "I'll swing you up, quick as can be."
Twilight looked from his roof to the railing two floors down. It wasn't academically much of a fall, but it looked pretty far in the darkness. Besides which, the airship itself was so high up that it was hard to make out anything on the ground or ocean below. She gave the offered hoof a look colored by trepidation. Even if she was tempted.
"I don't know..."
"Hey, don't worry! I may not look it, but I'm a good flyer." He held out his other front hoof, too. "I won't let anything bad happen."
"I guess... oh!" Twilight gasped as he took her hooves and pulled her up close. His wings flapped easily, raising them both up and over the lip of the observatory dome. Twilight crushed her eyes closed as they whirled around. Then, thankfully, her hind legs touched a solid surface and she relaxed.
"Here we go! Last stop; top floor!" The pegasus stallion let her go, making sure she stayed on her hooves and didn't slip. She opened her eyes and noticed him glancing upward at one of the masts of the airship.
"Almost the top floor," he amended, pointing at the crow's nest. Then he smiled carelessly and shrugged. "Close enough, though! Not really room for two up there!"
Twilight nodded and saw down on her haunches.
There was no telescope here, of course, just the slight curve of the observatory dome beneath her, ridged with ascending steps to catch and break up rainwater or ice. The sky was vast and black overhead and completely exposed in all directions. The airship was higher than she had ever been before; higher than Cloudsdale even. She could see the horizon curve all around her and the stars above were bright and sharply in focus.
"Don't get to see a nice night like this very often back home," the pegasus next to her said, leaning back with his hooves behind his head. Twilight chuckled.
"What?" he asked, hearing the laughter.
"Nothing. You just... reminded me of somepony," Twilight explained with a growing smile. "She likes to lounge around like that."
"Nopony lounges around like a pegasus," he joked. "We've got the perfect metabolism for it."
"I'd believe that!"
A gust of wind forced Twilight to smooth out her mane and she took the resulting silence to enjoy the sky. Even unaided, she could see the constellations clearly and even the planets. The Pale Mare, Venus, was faint, but the Celestial King, Jupiter, was bright white in the sky, second only to the Moon herself. The Red Pegasus, Mars, was also visible, and so named for his habit of making turns in the sky. Old mares tales said that, once, long ago, all the heavenly bodies had earthly ones, too, and that only Celestia and Luna were left. It was probably just that - a story - since Twilight knew at least one alicorn with no heavenly counterpart.
Then again, Cadence did have the whole 'love magic' thing often attributed to the Pale Mare. That had to be coincidence, though. Love magic wasn't some big mystery. Neither was raising the moon or sun, even, since ponies had been doing it even before the Princesses came along. It was all just mythology, but that didn't make it any less interesting.
Stealing a look at the pegasus next to her, Twilight wondered what he was seeing, looking at up in the sky. She even opened her mouth to ask, but a moment of shyness struck and she bit her tongue. He didn't seem to be looking at much in particular. Just like Rainbow Dash, he was relaxed and seemingly half asleep even when alert. Not that the similarities went too far: this pegasus was no mare and he had a toned and athletic body quite different from Dash's.
Blushing a bit, Twilight forced her eyes upwards.
"So, uh," she tried to think of something to say that wouldn't end up embarrassing. "What's your favorite star?"
The unicorn mare groaned inside at how corny and nerdy that had to sound.
"The moon used to be my favorite," he answered after a few seconds. "Until we lost the mare in it. It's still bright, but..." He chuckled. "I guess it still feels like it’s missing something. As a kid I used to imagine there was a real mare in the moon, except she was actually - you know - as big as the moon. Guess I was right and wrong."
"Truth can be stranger than fiction," Twilight replied, but 'hmm'ed as she also considered: "Though a moon sized pony would be hard to top."
"I know, right?" Green eyes darted over to find her. "What about you? You have a favorite?"
"I have lots of favorites!"
"Yeah?"
Twilight pointed up at the twinkling sky. "Orion! Probably my favorite of favorites. It has a nice hourglass shape and it's so mysterious! Nopony knows what an 'Orion' is, except that it's some kind of mythological hunter or predator. Starswirl speculated that Orion was a spirit, though, and not based on a real animal."
"Then, how could I forget? Pisces is another great one! It's so long and complex, curving down and then off to the side." She traced the constellation in the sky for him, adding a bit of magic to make it easier to see. "Pisces actually used to be called The Tail among earth ponies, since to them, it looked more like a pony's tail than a fish. Of course, almost all the treatises on stars were compiled and written by unicorns, so we all use the unicorn naming conventions... but isn't that interesting? How many other stars could have different names if things in the past had changed?"
"And, well, there's Pegasus..." she said, pointing just above the head of Pisces.
"Probably the coolest constellation," the stallion joked, spreading his wings beneath him. He reached up to right next to her hoof, drawing the rearing front legs of the horse, the head and the wing.
"And next to it," he continued, pointing twice. "Equuleus. The foal. Though they never taught us what kind of foal."
"She's next to Pegasus, so she's probably another pegasus."
"She's a she, now?"
Twilight laughed lightly, playfully batting away his hoof.
"I'm actually a little surprised," she admitted, lying back a little. "You knew what I was talking about."
"Some of it," the stallion replied. "Not the history stuff, though, but I learned some things about the night sky. I used to do a lot of distance flying."
"Distance flying?"
"Endurance flying? You know?" He saw she didn't and explained, "I guess there's nothing fancy to it. It's just another kind of racing, but instead of going fast, you have to go far. Sometimes you fly for days, so you have to navigate by the stars. I did a lot of scouting in the air force, too, and it comes in handy."
"A star and the horizon gives you altitude," he continued, gesturing up in the sky and then down at the distant curve of the planet below. "The tail of Ursa Minor up there, the Guiding Star, helps you find your degrees from the equator. With a little dead reckoning, even without calculating azimuth, a pegasus can get a good idea for where he is."
"Though... I'm actually not that great at it. I know ponies who have that kind of thing for a cutie mark. They're really good." He shook his head, not bothered by the comparison. "I just like the night sky because... I guess, when you're just out there flying by yourself, it's like you aren't totally alone." He grinned broadly and childishly. "Just mostly alone, I guess!"
Twilight nodded. "I can understand that."
She didn't want to admit it or say it out loud, but even with Spike around, back before coming to Ponyville it had sometimes felt like she was alone in her apprentice's study. Most of the time she didn't think about it; she was happy with her books, her projects for the Princess, and her number one assistant. Other times, rarely, she had turned to the stars for a little company. Even though this pegasus had admitted to doing the same, Twilight still didn't quite feel comfortable saying she had been in the same boat.
"What were we talking about before, anyway?" he asked.
"Distance flying?"
"Oh yeah!" He inhaled deeply, staring up at the night sky. "Good times. I'm not bad in a short race either, and my acrobatics are pretty good, I think... but it was my endurance that earned me my spot. Riding a thermal and just going with it."
"What do you mean, earned you your spot?" Twilight made a playful production of checking him over. "I don't see any spots."
"I'm kinda on vacation to get away from all that," the stallion admitted, considering his options for a few seconds before making a decision. Holding out his hoof, he smiled at her. "I'm Soarin."
"Nice to meet you, Soarin!" Twilight shook his hoof. "So, uh, what's this spot and this vacation stuff?"
Long green palms swayed beneath the hot mid-day sun, the gentle crash of waves on the lagoon shore mixing with the sound of haggling voices and the clopping of hooves on wooden planks and gritty stone-grain streets. The smell of a hot grill loaded with spiced vegetables permeated the air and one small shop after another offered a variety of trinkets and wares.
Fluttershy found it was exciting, but also all a little overwhelming.
"Oh, um, it is very pretty... but thirty bits?"
"Only have two left, and this is best one by far!" The salespony before her certainly didn't seem worried by all the noise and passersby. The slim, dark maned earth pony lifted the necklace in question in the air, calling out, "Jewelry! Hoof crafted! Best deals on the island!"
"Oh, wait, please." Fluttershy pleaded meekly raising a hoof in protest. She noticed a few mares in the marketplace take at least a passing look at the necklace that had caught her eye. Colorful and finely woven with beads and slivers of beach combed abalone shell, it looked so different from anything she had seen in Ponyville; it would be a great souvenir.
But thirty bits?
She hadn't even gotten a souvenir for Angel Bunny, yet!
"Better decide quick, Miss," the salespony insisted. He put the necklace back down on the counter of his stall. "I always sell out quick when boats come in."
"Oh, um..." Fluttershy couldn't help but feel this whole situation was somewhat familiar. "Well..."
"Blast it all!" a voice growled from behind her. "Do watch where you're going, you simpleton!"
"Hey! Not my fault you were behind me! Be more careful next time!"
Fluttershy shrank back a bit as two stallions, both earth ponies, glared heatedly over some sort of misunderstanding. She could see a saddlebag on the ground, the contents partly spilled out from the open latch. One of the ponies, the larger one with a white coat and silver-rimmed glasses, seemed to be staring down his smaller counterpart in a festive shirt. With an indignant snort, the shirted pony turned and stomped off without apology.
"Ill-bred, manner-less, mule," the big stallion grumbled, and with a grimace, tried to duck down and collect the bits and pieces of metal that had fallen out of his bag. Most of the passerby ignored him, but he clearly wasn't having an easy time of it with just his -
"Curse these hooves," he muttered, just loud enough for her to overhear. "I have half a mind to..."
Whatever he had half a mind to do, or say, he paused with surprise as a pair of butter yellow hooves helped gather up the fallen gear. It looked like pieces of a compass and some strange metal strips marked with chicken-scratches. Delicately picking the pieces up, Fluttershy offered them back.
"You're helping me?" he asked, wary, holding his opened saddlebag a little more tightly. "Why?" His eyes narrowed slightly in thinly veiled suspicion. "What do you want?"
"I just... I thought... you could use some help," Fluttershy explained, and the stallion's shoulders lost some of their tension. He opened his bag and she carefully put the slightly sandy pieces of - well, she wasn't sure what they were - but at least they were back inside this poor pony's bag. He didn't seem quite so handy with his hooves, especially since he was an earth pony.
He still seemed baffled by her assistance, taking a few seconds to compose himself.
"You just thought I could use the help?" he asked, and suddenly the look in his eyes seemed to imply 'either you're lying, or you're crazy.' "...That's it?"
Fluttershy nodded, each movement of her head meeker than the last.
"Oh. Well... thank you..." He bit his lip, as if expressing gratitude took some work on his part. "Miss?"
Suddenly, her urge to help a pony-in-need satisfied, Fluttershy's terminal sheepishness returned in force. She blushed behind her long pink mane, scuffing the ground with a hoof as she looked away. She tried to tell him her name, but of course he barely seemed to hear her. She tried again, and his response was a firm: "What now? Hmm? Speak up, would you please?"
"F-Fluttershy," she finally managed to roar, though it came out as barely more than a squeak.
"Miss Fluttershy," he said, to be sure he had heard correctly. She nodded, and noticed a certain tightness in his eyes as he got another look at her. Shrugging, he affixed the loop of his saddlebag and clipped it back in place over his barrel-like torso.
"A distinct pleasure to meet you, then, Miss Fluttershy," he said, holding out his hoof to help her up.
"Oh, um, thank you." She took his hoof as he effortlessly pulled her up to stand. "Pleased to meet you, too..."
"Bellargus Blue," he said quickly. "Just a simple earth pony here on vacation."
He noticed her staring back at the market stall from before and at the salespony there, still enticingly dangling the necklace she wanted. Excusing herself, Fluttershy started back over. A resigned sigh followed as she craned her neck to pick out her purse. Thirty bits. If that was what she had to pay, then that was just what she had to pay.
"Pardon, Miss Fluttershy." Bellargus trotted boldly up, holding out his leg to stop her. "But how much do you intend to pay for that bauble?"
"Thirty bits," she answered, shrinking back a little at the look of effrontery on his face.
A look swiftly turned on the salespony.
"Thirty bits?" he snapped, turning up his nose.
"Thirty bits," the dark maned salespony insisted. "Good deal!"
"Oh, I see. I must be mistaken," the tall stallion realized, nodding to himself. "You are quite correct. It is a good deal. For at least one of you."
"It-"
"Why, that trinket is not even real abalone," Bellargus said with an exaggerated nod of approval. "Those beads... are they supposed to be coral? Because they're wood. Truly a wonderful deal you offer her, as I would not pay five bits for such workmareship! I would hesitate to insult a pony by even giving it to them as a gift! Perhaps it would have some use as a source of stress relief, since it will inevitably break anyway. Or it could even suffice as a gag item at a fair."
"H- how could...!" The salespony sputtered, his eyes shooting guiltily over to Fluttershy to see if she believed anything she had heard. "Miss, do not listen to this one! This is very good deal! Um. If you have twenty bits-"
"Oh ho! Twenty bits now?" The stallion asked.
"Fifteen bits! Is same price I paid to have it made!"
"Then why sell it for that?" Bellargus snapped, unafraid to slam a hoof onto the counter of the market stall. "Are you so eager to be rid of it?"
"I - I uh..."
"Disgraceful. The nerve. The effrontery!" The big earth pony turned around. "Come with me, Miss. I know a shop with real mother-of-pearl. Let this foal scam some other mare."
Fluttershy was not immune to anger or indignation of her own. Not by a long shot. Even if she hadn't quite been sure what to think at first, the way the salespony had so quickly settled for half the price he had demanded she pay still managed to get under her normally forgiving skin, like a thorn biting deep one too many times. This pony had tried to swindle her out of at least fifteen bits. Probably more.
"S-sorry," she said, and mustered enough assertiveness to stick up her chin, snubbing the greedy salespony. "But no sale!"
Feeling rather good about herself, Fluttershy followed the large earth pony. He seemed quite sure of himself as he navigated the maze of beachfront marketplaces, occasionally pointing out shops with worthwhile merchandise. He didn't even have to pause to ask for directions or check a map. He just strode through without a moment's hesitation or doubt.
"Bellargus?"
"Hm. Yes?" he asked, leading her up a flight of wooden steps.
"Have you been here before?"
"Once," he answered. "Years ago."
"Another vacation? Is that why you know your way around?"
"Something like that." His answer was evasive, so she didn't press for details.
She did, however, notice his cutie mark. "I... oh, I think I've seen that cutie mark before!"
He stopped, mid-step. "R-really?"
"Daring Do has that cutie mark!" Fluttershy said, happy to have remembered. Rainbow Dash loved those books so much! Fluttershy wasn't much of a fan herself, things could get too violent in them for her tastes, but she had seen many pictures of the fearless and resourceful pegasus on her friend's book covers.
"She does, doesn't she?" Bellargus Blue mused, resuming his pace. "Daring Do." He chuckled, very quietly. "We're almost there, Miss Fluttershy. This way."
There were fewer tourists here on the upper level of the marketplace, closer to the island's village. Instead of market stalls, there were also quite a few wooden huts. The ponies here all had darker manes and tails combined with pale, sun bleached coats. She watched as one of them, a mare, walked by with a stack of woven rugs on her back. Another one stood at a large shack, drying and beating a curtain of roasted sea-grass.
Bellargus led her to a small jewelry shop next to a larger store, speaking a few words with the salespony in both Equestrian and a local tongue. Fluttershy noticed right away that much of the jewelry here was simpler looking, at least from a distance. The salespony suggested a few pieces but otherwise left her to browse. She soon found a necklace to her liking, with delicate round beads of pink the same color as her mane. Carved pieces of iridescent shell marked the sides, lining up with her shoulders and collar.
"Forty bits?" Fluttershy stammered at the price. "B-but that's more..."
"Quality comes with cost," Bellargus Blue told her and laughed as he fished out his coin purse. "Allow me to pitch in. Just this once."
"Oh, you don't have to! Really." Fluttershy objected, though she couldn't help but admire the expensive riviere.
"Correct. I really don't have to," the stallion agreed. "But your company has me in an unusually good mood. Think of it as me repaying your kindness earlier."
"You don't have to repay kindness," Fluttershy told him. "But, um, if you really want to..."
Before long, Fluttershy had her vacation souvenir safely and securely in her bag and a piece of baked sea-grass wound around a stick to eat. It was peppery on the outside and salty on the inside and, best of all, she’d made a new friend. Bellargus Blue was nice enough to escort her around the market to help her find anything else that struck her fancy, though he refused to pay for anything else. She also learned that he was from Equestria when he let slip that he had family in Canterlot.
"Ah, so you really came for the undersea excursion?" he asked as they walked down the rocky, volcanic beach. The dusky sand was hot enough that they both had to wear hoof-slippers.
"Yes. I was really looking forward to swimming with all the fishes and seeing the reef up close." They were on their way over to one of the chartered boats taking ponies out to the lagoon.
"The trip out to the water was why most ponies came here, I suppose." Bellargus pointed to the rather long lines outside the ships.
"You wanted to see the reef, too, didn't you?"
"Among other things," he answered with an easy, confident smile. "I actually have my own ship chartered to take me out to... a special part of the lagoon."
Fluttershy slowed, falling a bit behind as he walked past.
"Mister Blue," she said, as he also slowed to see what was bothering her. Fluttershy fixed him with a serious look. "Are you a smuggler?"
The big stallion blinked, dumbly.
And then he laughed, tossing back his sunray yellow mane. Fluttershy's own serious expression morphed into a pout as she realized he was laughing at her question. It was a different laugh than the slightly mean chuckle he had shown before when dealing with ponies in the marketplace. This one seemed freer... more genuine. Still, he was laughing at her! She felt her face heat up as her body tried to decide whether to be angry or embarrassed or indignant or whether she should just fly away and hide in the fronds of a palm tree.
Reining herself in, Fluttershy very gently stomped a hoof on the sandy ground.
"I was being serious," she said, and the action only prompted him to laugh again.
"That, my dear, is why it was so funny!" He walked around to face her, ducking his head a bit until he was eye level. "I am far from a smuggler, Miss Fluttershy. I doubt I could be accused of smuggling, even if I tried."
"What does that mean?" Fluttershy asked, briefly taking to the air as he circled around and headed back towards the berthed ships.
He didn't answer, but driven by curiosity and more than a little concern, she tagged along. The alternative was waiting in line for hours to get onto a cramped boat, a thought that wasn't very appealing to the shy pegasus. Bellargus hadn't been lying when he said he had chartered a ship just for himself. It was smaller than the others, but still crewed and fully staffed. They let the stallion on without fuss, having expected him. His guest was less expected, but no less welcome.
"Bellargus isn't your real name, is it?" Fluttershy asked, making a few last minute checks on her swim gear, especially the swimfins that had been attached to her back hooves.
"What makes you say that?" The stallion answered with a question of his own, adjusting the goggles over his eyes.
"Bellargus is the name of a butterfly... a blue one. Bellargus Blue doesn't sound... right."
"Just because of that you think I'm using an alias?"
"Now I really do, um... since you, you know, you called it an 'alias'... Ohh!"
Fluttershy fell back into the water, holding her respirator up to her mouth. A little push into the lagoon was one way of ending a conversation, and very quickly, she forgot about her suspicions. Below the chartered boat was a whole new world! A rainbow of colors in coral and sponges spread out beneath her and all across the reef, broken by patches of green leafy sea-weed and sea-grass, drifting against the undersea currents.
She saw giant clams on the sea bed, schools of fish in a kaleidoscope of colors, and even a curious sea turtle cruising by. Swimming gracefully over to the large green reptile, Fluttershy reached out to touch its hard shell. The marine turtle seemed to almost smile at her, letting her hold onto it as it paddled slowly through the sea. The only problem, one she had very much expected, was that she couldn't actually talk to any of the creatures underwater. A sea snake soon came by, wrapping around her foreleg before uncoiling and heading into shallower waters.
A flash of light caught her attention and Fluttershy spun around to see Bellargus and two other ponies in the water. The big stallion had some sort of underwater camera assembled. It was partly contained in a magical field, allowing it to operate much like it would on land. Fluttershy had a camera of her own, of course, but as far as she knew nopony had one that could work in the ocean. She swam closer as he took another picture with her and the sea snake.
It was impossible to talk underwater, but as she got close, he gestured down.
Together with another earth pony, he dove deeper and Fluttershy followed. The trip wasn't hurried; there was plenty of time to take in the many natural wonders of the reef. Even without her voice, the animals seemed to sense who she was and that she was a kindred spirit, coming in close to examine the strange swimming pegasus or flocking around her to vie for her attention.
A small school of dolphins zeroed in on the swimming ponies in short order, circling and investigating the visitors to the reef. Fluttershy giggled to herself as one of the nudged her side, looking for food. It was likely that quite a few of the local sea creatures had grown used to getting handouts from pony divers elsewhere in the lagoon.
To her delight and surprise, Bellargus soon retrieved a small bag of fish from the other earth pony swimmer with him. Holding one of the fish out, he let a dolphin snap it up, running a hoof along it's back as it twisted and rolled away. It squeaked happy at the treat and Bellargus gestured for Fluttershy to swim over so she could join in.
It was a bit of a cheat, using food, but Fluttershy often fed her animal friends back home once they had gotten used to her. Most animals had a natural, innate connection with ponykind, but even then it occasionally needed a little nudge. It was just a shame that none of her friends had wanted to come and swim with her. There were so many wonderful new animal friends out here!
A small shark, more wary of the circling dolphins than the strange ponies, gobbled up a dangling fish before heading off at high speed. Fluttershy smiled, happy to be able to share the moment with somepony. Bellargus had seemed a little concerned by the predatory fish, but he was clearly comfortable enough among the dolphins and other species that came to check them out. He had given most of the food to Fluttershy and idled nearby while she enjoyed herself.
Feeding her last treat to a particularly friendly dolphin, Fluttershy shrugged and dangled the empty bag. The marine mammal nosed the empty sack, swam in a circle and rubbed affectionately against her wing. The others, noticing the party was out of free snacks, began to form up into a pod to move on.
The one who nuzzled her wing lingered, getting a little too affectionate.
"Oh dear." Fluttershy noticed that her new friend was a bit more excited by her then she was comfortable with. At least now she knew it was a he.
"Um, sorry," she muttered into her respirator, bubbles escaping from around her cheeks. She gently tried to swim away. "I, um, don't... that is...I only like..."
To her relief, Bellargus swam by, taking her by the hoof. The excitable young dolphin made a little cork-screw dive, turned around and headed back to his pod. Still red in the face, Fluttershy saw the big stallion laughing behind his breathing mask. He reached down to his midsection and wiggled his flanks. Fluttershy's embarrassment quickly became laughter and she batted him playfully on the side as she swam past.
With her delight in the aquatic wonderland momentarily sated, Fluttershy kept close to Bellargus and the earth pony mare with him. They swam further and deeper down, past fields of brain coral and branching, skeleton-like reef structures. Down a large crevasse, they turned and began to search for something.
Fluttershy wondered if it could be sunken treasure, her mind racing with all sorts of strange possibilities. She couldn't help but remember how Bellargus had laughed when she asked if he was a smuggler. Was it possible: had she been at least close? Maybe he was a treasure hunter! He had seemed to pause when she had pointed out his cutie mark and how it resembled Daring Do's.
No sunken ships seemed to be around, though.
The other mare with him, whose name Fluttershy hadn't gotten before, pointed to something amid the overhanging coral. Carefully swimming to her, Fluttershy saw the ragged entrance to a cave of some sort. A grotto, maybe? It was large enough, once found, for a good sized pony to enter through.
Bellargus swam over and some kind of bright light appeared over his head...
It took a few seconds for Fluttershy to realize it wasn't a light over his head - it was the glow of his horn. He was a unicorn? Seeing her surprise and directing the light out in one direction, Bellargus turned to her and held his hoof up to his lips: the universal sign for 'ssssh, don't tell anypony.' Then he turned to the cave, newly illuminated, and entered.
The earth pony mare he had brought along didn't seem surprised by her boss' sudden transformation from earth pony to unicorn. She nodded to Fluttershy and remained outside, holding some kind of device in her hooves. Not quite sure what to expect, her natural timidity at odds with her growing curiosity, Fluttershy made up her mind and swam into the cave entrance.
She could see Bellargus - or whatever his name really was - up ahead, his horn bathing the dark cave in radiant light. It may as well have been sunlight, it was so gentle and powerful. It made him easy to follow and helped to ease Fluttershy's trepidation. She even had the time and presence of mind to look around.
The walls of the cave seemed... too straight... to be natural.
The cave quickly turned upwards but kept to the same dimensions. Abruptly, Bellargus Blue stopped and pointed to one of the walls. He held up his magically enchanted camera to take a picture and in the light of his horn, Fluttershy could see what looked almost like a carving of a trio of dolphins. They were close together, but still three separate etchings. Their orientation reminded her of the typical three-base arrangement of a cutie mark, her own being a prime example.
They swam on until the cave jutted sharply up, leading to a larger grotto. There was no light inside the cave and as a result, little plant or animal life. Even then, some smaller to medium sized fish had taken to using it as a safe retreat. A small green eel retreated into a crack in the wall, reminding Fluttershy of the much, much larger cousins it had infesting a quarry near Ponyville.
The undersea grotto was otherwise bare, except for a few more carvings on the walls and some sort of tablet on the floor. Bellargus carefully went over the open area, taking pictures and occasionally putting down metal markers to give a sense of scale. Finally, he used rolls of some sort of parchment, clearly water resistant, to make a rubbing of the carvings. Fluttershy immediately wondered why he was ignoring the tablet - it was just sitting there - until she swam close enough to read it. Instead of just strange marks, it also had two lines in Equestrian and a picture of a pony, one hoof raised in greeting.
Breaking the surface a half hour later, Fluttershy lowered the respirator from her mouth to suck in a few long gasps of fresh air. Bellargus and his two compatriots emerged moments later. They at least seemed to be genuine earth ponies. He was still a unicorn.
And she knew who he was.
"You probably want to talk," he said, swimming past her to climb up onto the ship.
- -
"I thought I recognized you." Fluttershy didn't like how upset she sounded, but she had expected him to be covering up his name. Not... just not this much.
They sat alone in the cabin of the ship, motionless and stationary over the lagoon. It was surprising how much heat a pony lost swimming even in warm water, so Fluttershy had a voluminous blue blanket wrapped around her shoulders and back. Her pink mane and tail were still a little wet, but at least she'd gotten her wings dry enough to fly. She didn't feel or look like a wet dog.
"I recognized you, too." Bellargus - or as she now knew, Prince Blueblood - sat on a plush couch in the cabin. His enchanted camera rested on a table nearby.
He leaned forward and made a googly-eyed face.
"You're going to love me," he declared in a bored monotone before leaning back to relax. "Celestia's light, what a night that was."
"Rarity told us about you," Fluttershy said, sitting down, willing to be civilized but still cautious around him.
"Given her reaction to me during my airship christening, I'm sure her ‘Prince’ wasn't what she expected," he replied, sounding just a bit too smug.
"You really made her feel bad," Fluttershy told him, her voice becoming stern enough to shed the normal stutter or stammer. "She waited so long to meet you. As long as I've known her. And you spoiled all that in one night."
For just a moment, he looked like a young colt who had been scolded.
"I'm sure it wasn't that bad to have... to - to show her..." He gritted his teeth, fighting against being chided. Eventually he gave up, his only defense coming in the form of a groan. "Urrgh!"
"Why would you even-"
"I've been brushing off would-be Princesses since I hit puberty," he snapped, though it was more a grumble than an actual outburst. Nothing like the pique he had shown to the shopkeeper earlier in the day. "You know the only way I can get out of the castle?"
He held up his hoof to his horn, and in a sparkle of magic it vanished.
"Instant earth pony," he announced with a little flourish. "Let me ask you, Miss Fluttershy: do you think your friend would've chased me around at the Gala if I was like this? Or would she have ignored me to try and track down Celestia's eligible, rich single nephew?"
"Rarity is a wonderful pony," Fluttershy insisted, having none of it. "You never gave her a chance."
The surly Prince chewed his lip, still refusing to acknowledge his mistake.
"You should apologize when we get back to the ship," she insisted.
"Me? Me! Apologize?" Blueblood seemed scandalized. "Surely you jest!"
"I most certainly am not," Fluttershy replied, narrowing her eyes a bit so he could see how upset all this had made her, and through her, all of Rarity's friends. "Maybe you both had the wrong approach to things that night, but I know Rarity is a good and caring pony, and I think you are, too. When you want to be."
"Hmf!"
Her glare intensified. "I bet you're sorry, too, you just don't want to admit it."
"Celestia's flanks! ... Fine. Maybe I... just fine. I'll apologize." He quickly amended, "In private! I'd rather not make a spectacle of things. And don't expect me to be too nice - she's not my type and I don't think I'm hers."
"Good." Fluttershy nodded, smiling in triumph. "That wasn't so hard, now was it?"
"Well, I haven't done it yet." He rolled his eyes but smirked at her. "I'm sure the actual apology will be like chewing glass."
"The Gala wasn't... um..." Fluttershy blushed a bit at the way he was watching her, minus the tide of indignation to keep her afloat. "It wasn't anypony at their best. But... I think we should all try and forgive each other and move on."
Blueblood didn't reply with words, he nodded once and glanced away, out to the cabin window. He had a towel beneath him and draped over one shoulder, but his coat was still moist and his blond hair fell over his face. Fluttershy could privately and secretly see why Rarity had gushed about him - before meeting him face to face, anyway. He was an extremely attractive stallion.
How often had her friend whispered about how she had dreamed of being held against that broad chest, staring into deep blue eyes, running her hooves along that long, thick horn -
"Oh. Oh dear." Fluttershy squeaked and hid her face behind her hooves. "This isn't good. This really isn't good!"
"What isn't?" Blueblood asked, his attention now back on her, full force.
Beet red, the shy pegasus curled into a ball on her couch seat.
"Anyway," the Prince continued, and she couldn't see his reaction to her mortified state. "Since we're still on the water and I've had my fun, do you want to try diving somewhere else? The first mate mentioned a kelp forest on the eastern rise, I'm sure you..."
Before he could continue, Fluttershy peeked out over her crossed forelegs.
"That cave we went to," she said, struggling to fight her embarrassment raise her voice enough to be heard. "Are there, um, others like that?"
"Oh, that. I'm sure there are," he replied, sucking in a deep breath. "Somewhere. But I haven't found any, and I'm usually quite adept at finding things." He raised his right flank and briskly patted his cutie mark. "Special skill and all. I found that one years ago when I first came here on royal business."
"That tablet?" Fluttershy asked. "You left it behind."
He nodded. "I did. I guess this little patch of ocean's been well and truly abandoned. At least there's the dolphins. That one really liked you, Miss Fluttershy. Do you always have such an amorous effect on animals?"
"No!" She jumped up, but quickly squeaked and tried to hide her face again. "I mean, no," she muttered. "That was the first time. Well... except for a dog... and this one bear..."
One of Blueblood's eyebrows arced. "A bear? Oh ho ho."
Mustering just enough courage to raise her eyes from hiding, Fluttershy knew she had to ask just one other thing. One question. The most important one.
"You seemed to... um... do you..."
"Do I...?" he prompted.
He had seemed quite happy and comfortable around the animals underwater. Moreso than when he had been with ponies on land. Plus, he had picked an animal for an alias. Maybe...
"Do you," Fluttershy took a breath and just said it, "Do you like animals?"
Rainbow Dash knocked the door as hard as she dared, fully aware that most of her friends were still asleep in their rooms. To say nothing of all the strangers further up and down the hall.
"Great. Just great! She must be sleeping like a log in there." Or like a big wad of cookie dough. "I'm done waiting, Pinkie! So you have, like, ten seconds before I go by myself!"
Counting down, Dash could already tell she'd be solo this morning.
Normally, Pinkie was good for a morning run to stretch her legs. It was probably part of why she wasn't the size and shape of her party balloon, no matter how many entire-cakes she inhaled. That and some kind of nuclear monster type metabolism. Something had distracted the fun loving pink pony the other night - probably some trouble she was in - and now she was out like a light come morning.
Heading up to the above decks, Rainbow Dash opened a door to the first class lounges and then jogged down to the promenade. The Eros Dreaming was back at cruising altitude but the weather wasn't as cooperative as it had been the last few days. The sky was marked by a few distant clouds, ones too high to be the work of pegasi. They were wild clouds, then, having drifted in from untamed parts of the country. None of them looked like rain, and they were pretty sparse to boot, though a pony could never entirely tell around self-spawning clouds.
Stretching her wings out, Dash lifted off and began to plot out her circuit around the upper levels of the ship. With all the pegasus guests and workers on board, there had been a special set of rules set down on day one about no-flying zones. It was seriously lame... but then again, flying into an electrical wire or being cut in half by a metal cable was lamer. Those areas were all magically lit up and some had fields to discourage flying.
The best course was a simple oval. The ship's crew had even set up large rings around certain points in the structure, just in case certain restless pegasi felt the need to race around. Rainbow Dash cruised at a good pace at first before accelerating along the set course. A blue hoop shot by and she twirled into a flawless barrel roll, gently banking to the right as she passed by the prow of the mammoth airship. This early in the morning, she had the sky all to herself, and if Pinkie wasn't going to bother coming along, there was no need to land at all.
Wind against her face, Rainbow Dash reveled in the speed and freedom of the air, even if it was on a set course. Briefly deviating, she headed up - ever up - towards one of the wild clouds up in the stratosphere. Even the huge cruise airliner below began to shrink before she turned away and spiraled down in a slow, comfortable dive.
"I wonder if Pinkie ever woke up...?" Dash angled away, checking out the door she had exited the ship from just a quarter hour earlier.
No pink pony.
On the verge of flying off, she just noticed another larger shape galloping along the promenade. A sweep of her wings and she tilted away, making another slower circle of the ship. Coming around, though, she saw the same pony. On the same promenade course.
Dipping and diving, she flew by to get a good look.
"Oh, hey!" Dash said, waiving a hoof as a familiar face turned to find her. "I remember you!"
"Miss... Rainbow Dash, isn't it?" The unicorn stallion kept jogging even as she converted her flying into a sidelong drift. "A pleasure to see you once again."
Still on cruise control, Dash crossed her front legs over her chest. "So what's a big time Canterlot pony like you doing out this morning?"
"The same thing you are, I'd wager," the stallion replied. "A morning constitutional."
"About the only way to keep in shape while I'm stuck on this ship," Dash explained.
"Not much of an indoors mare?" A blue moustache waggled as Fancypants picked up his pace.
"I haven't found that much to do indoors."
"Such a shame," the refined unicorn observed. "The spas?"
"Blegh."
"The pool, then?"
"The high dive was kinda neat, but I prefer the air."
"The theater? The salon? The clubs?"
"Rarity and Pinkie's territory."
Fancypants chuckled as he galloped, keeping up a good pace. "There is an extensive library..."
"You gotta be kidding!"
"Perchance you could enjoy the casino, then?" Fancypants raced ahead, something Dash just couldn't let slide. Dropping down to all fours, taking just a second to stretch out and limber up, she was soon alongside the Canterlot stallion.
"The casino?" she asked, having to work a little harder to meet his longer stride.
"Of course." He gave her a conspiratorial wink. "This ship has a magical wireless, and I never miss a Wonderbolt Derby."
- - -
That night, Rainbow Dash entered the ship's casino just a tad under-dressed. This being a polite way of describing the fact that she was completely undressed. On the other hoof, she had combed her mane. That counted for something, right? She had thought so on her way over, but most everypony seemed to be wearing something.
She tried not to think too much about that as she descended the steps into the casino floor. The whole place was circular, with a large bar and restaurant in the center and radiating waves of tables and brightly lit slot machines. Booths and doors to showrooms occupied the elevated ring around the floor. Everywhere there was the jingle of bits and the excited beeping and clicking of gambling machines. Every row of them seemed different, with spinning pictures and representations of cards or shapes or places.
Flashing lights and magical illusions danced in the air overhead and Dash could hear the distant sound of music from one of the rooms. It was all a little heady and overwhelming. A cheer rose up from a nearby table with a spinning wheel as one of the ponies there celebrated something. On another, a mare tossed a pair of dice and gaped, distressed, at the result of her roll.
Trotting back up to the outer ring of the casino area, Rainbow Dash nudged open one of the doors to look inside. There was a room beyond, like a theater, with two ponies on stage. One was a large earth pony stallion and the other a much smaller unicorn. The duo seemed to be putting on a magic act, packing a bunch of ponies from the audience into a blue box that looked WAY too small to hold them.
"How the heck are they doin' that?"
Ducking back out, checking the rooms counterclockwise, she found the VIP lounge on the next try. A burly earth pony bouncer checked her room key and ID before letting her through. Inside was a large parlor with an open bar, center stage, and a smattering of wealthy looking ponies. Still feeling a little out of place, Dash sucked in a breath, inflating both her lungs and her confidence, before heading over to the bar.
Sipping from an appletini, she quickly noticed that Fancypants was the center of attention. Everypony seemed to want to hang out around him but he treated the constant attention like it was of little consequence rather than an annoyance or indulgence. She wondered briefly if he had a crazy fan club like she had in Ponyville. It was flattering, yeah, and she was admittedly pretty awesome - but it was kinda weird too. Scootaloo she could see acting like that, but everytime she dropped in on them, there had been a disturbingly large number of adult ponies there, too.
Fancypants had to work a little to get them to disperse enough for him to head over. For once not intending to butt in, Dash just waited. She was here for the Wonderbolts Derby, first and foremost. He was close enough that she was thinking of making some token greeting when somepony turned up the wireless.
"...is set to begin! We're here at the be-utiful Canterlot Hippodrome for what promises to be an afternoon of exciting races! The competitors are making the rounds of the cloud field now, waving to what has to be a packed audience of five thousand cheering ponies mountain-side! The air is electric, folks. And there we have the reigning champions, the Wonderbolts-Blue charioteer team, Cannon Ball and Winter Bora! Oh, you can just feel the roar of the crowd, literally feel the clamor of a thousand hooves, from your ankles to the tips of your ears, ladies and gentlestallions! It sounds like we have a lot of Greens in the audience tonight, and they are really hoping to see these two taken down. But don't worry. Security is on hoof, folks, so hopefully we won't see a repeat of the brawl at last week's race."
"Rainbow Dash," Fancypants said, shedding the last of his tenacious entourage, the crowd of unicorns glaring jealously across the room at the object of his attention.
"Fancy," the weathermare replied, vigorously shaking his hoof in greeting. "Thanks for the heads up! I would've missed the race if not for you."
"No problem at all, my dear." He turned to the bartender. "Manehattan, equals parts dry and sweet." Fancypants then set his attention to the wireless radio. "Are you a Blue by any chance?"
"I kinda wish I was," Dash told him, sipping from her half empty apple martini. "My parents were Reds so I'm a Red, too."
"Ah, shame."
"The Reds haven't won a championship since when my dad was my age." She shrugged. "I figure I'll probably live to sixty, so there's a fifty-fifty chance they'll win at least once by then."
"You never entertained the notion of switching teams?"
"Nope!" Dash saw his skeptical look and laughed. "Loyalty is loyalty. It'll make it all the sweeter when they do finally pull through. Even if I'm an old granny by then."
Fancypants raised his hoof in a respectful salute. "Admirable, Miss Dash."
On the radio, the announcer began describing the racing sets for the evening, back in Equestria. In a broad sense, virtually all racing fans in Equestria were divided into four camps, though the rivalry was strongest and oldest among the chariot racing aficionados. There were the Blue and Greens, the top two teams, and then there were the Whites and Reds. Sometimes, especially among pegasi, the rivalry between Blues and Greens got... heated. Racing was serious business, after all.
First up, though, were the individual sets: the flat course open-air races and then the obstacle races. Dash heard a cough and noticed the bartender presenting her with a card. She initially thought it to be a bill for her drink... but it was a racing sheet with a fancy quill pen. Fancypants had one as well.
"What say we adjourn to one of the couches?" he suggested, distractedly floating over his Manehattan with a bit of magic.
"Sure."
Dash soon found herself relaxing on a plush couch as the radio announced the upcoming race. Each racer had a number, one through four, and the sheet of paper she had reflected that fact. There were tally marks so she could record things for herself, but the sheet had another purpose...
"A hundred bits on Fleet Foot!"
"Two fifty on Sun Kiss!"
Reclining next to her, Fancypants considered his score card. "I'm inclined to put my money on Ice Queen. I hear she's vastly improved in the four to six lap range."
"That's a good bet," Rainbow agreed. "Ice is a Mareabian pegasus, so her acceleration isn't great. I'd say she needs about a full lap to get up to top speed, but once there, she’s got the endurance to keep going. I've also noticed that she uses angled wing distribution, so she'll benefit from the freshly repaved clouds in the Canterlot Hippodrome."
"First bet of the evening then?"
"Um..." Dash hesitated to say that she didn't really have much money to her name. Then again, these were the Wonderbolts! If she sucked at predicting their races then she deserved to go broke!
"Yeah! Why not?" she marked down a number on the sheet. "One hundred bits on Ice Queen!"
"AAAAND they're off! Sun Kiss takes an early lead! Look at her go! Fleet Foot is hot behind her, pulling up as they head into the corner! Sugar Syrup is in third, followed by Ice Queen. A bit of jostling between Sun Kiss and Fleet Foot, they better watch out, or they'll get their wings tangled! I can see the judge eyeing them now, but there, they're apart and gaining distance! Sun Kiss still in the lead! Fleet Foot in close second! Ice Queen still in the race, picking up steam! Sugar Syrup closing in from behind!"
Cheers rose up among the gamblers as Sun Kiss and Fleet Foot continued to jockey for first place through both the first and second laps. There was a little less vocal competition between Ice Queen and Sugar Syrup in third. Fancypants just listened, intently, nevermind that he had five hundred bits on the race's outcome.
Dash, too, tried to look cool and unworried. It was ‘only’ a hundred bits she'd put on Ice Queen. So about a week's wages. There was totally no need to panic. Finishing her martini in one gulp, as the racers entered the fourth lap, the weathermare totally didn't start chewing on her hooves. That would be uncool. If she did, at least no pony seemed to see it.
"And Ice Queen had finally thrown off Syrup! Ice Queen surges ahead! Ice Queen's nipping at Fleet Foot's tail! Sun Kiss is out of the lock and into the final lap! Sun Kiss, then Fleet Foot, then Ice Queen, then Sugar Syrup! The racers are hot around the bend, and the crowd is on their hooves, mares and stallions! Fleet Foot tries to shake off her - OH! And Ice Queen just slips past! They're into the stretch now, and there's nothing but air between Ice Queen and Sun Kiss! Can Sun Kiss keep the lead?"
Dash could feel her whole body vibrating as she imagined the race in her mind. "Come on... come on..."
"There's no room to jostle or bump! Ice Queen and Sun Kiss are neck and neck, nose and nose, eye to eye! Sun Kiss is beading sweat, but Ice Queen is cool as ever! They're in the home stretch, and, yes, I can see Ice Queen pulling ahead! They're across! It's over! Ice Queen by a foreleg, Sun Kiss, Fleet Foot just crossed, and now Sugar Syrup!"
"YEESSS!" Dash bounced straight off the couch, legs pedaling in excitement and her face flushed with victory. "YES! YES! YES!"
Fancypants laughed as he helped her back down, her wings buzzing.
"The night is still young, Miss Dash!" He put down a bet on the next race. "Juniper Jump! Four hundred bits!"
Across the room, other ponies also began placing their next round of bets. Dash grinned, checking her score card and running the matchup in her head. This one was a short race, only two laps. Fresh cloud turf. Minimal cross breeze. Of the four racers... Juniper Jump was a good bet, but not the best bet.
"Two hundred on Bullet Bill to win!"
"AAAND they're off...!"
A waitress pony came by, refilling her appletini. Dash hardly even noticed, as she tried to keep up her winning streak. Ponies cried and cheered as they lost hundreds of bits in the span of minutes or won twice as much in half the time.
"Four hundred on Breezie to place!"
Another check on her score card.
"Rapid Fire! Two hundred bits!"
The steeple chases came next, a challenging race involving obstacles on the track -
"Four hundred on Globe Trotter!"
"Two hundred fifty on Sky High!"
"A thousand on my girl, Spitfire!"
By the end of the night, Rainbow Dash's score card had far more checks than exes. The chariot races were the end of the derby and the highlight of the competition, but that was where Dash finally drew her line in the clouds. She was a fan of chariot races, but hardly much of an expert on them. Besides, it felt kind of wrong betting against her poor, beloved Red Team... who were basically doomed to get third.
"I think I'm done for tonight, Fancy," Dash said, putting her quill down on the table next to her empty drink. "I'm sure you'll be betting on your stupid Blues to win."
"I'd put money on Discord himself before those dastardly Greens!" He raised a hoof. "Twenty thousand on Wonderbolts-Blue!"
The biggest bets of the night were, naturally, on the charioteers. Cannon Ball and Winter Bora were both incredibly flyers at the peak of their careers and they had been flying in tandem for years. The Green team was good, too, but Dash knew odds favored the Blues. She had seen Cannon Ball and Bora, one of the few male-female teams, perform in Fillydelphia. It was like they could read each other's minds and anticipate every subtle shift in movement.
They were totally comfortable with each other. Like... the perfect couple... in a weird sort of way. Dash didn’t think she could have it in her to meet a guy and not try and out-fly him at every opportunity. She wasn't even sure she'd want a guy who didn't try and outdo her, either. It was the problem she'd always had with colts, either from flight school or Ponyville: they just couldn't keep up. Most never wanted to even try.
She listened with only half an ear as the race started. Fancypants seemed totally into it, his eyes lit up and his mouth slightly open as he listened to the radio. Most of the evening, he had remained totally cool and composed, winning or losing, but bit by bit she had noticed him steadily open up, becoming more energetic and expressive. Hearing the Blue team neck-and-neck with the Greens, he even pumped a hoof, uttering a quiet, "Yes! Go! Go!"
"Hey, Fancy?"
"Yes, Miss Dash?" He grimaced as the Green team pulled ahead in the third lap.
"After this, I'd like to get some fresh air. You wanna come with me?"
- -
"... No wonder you know so much about the Wonderbolts." Fancypants opened the door to the outer promenade, the same place - give or take a dozen yards - where she had flown into him this morning.
"It doesn't sound... you know... kinda obsessive?" Dash asked, walking outside and inhaling the fresh, cool night air. She'd only had a little drink, enough for a nice buzz but not enough to get really light headed. If anything, she was still a little high from all the bits she had won.
"Or weird?" She glanced up at the cloudy sky. "That I've got all this pointless, silly stuff memorized? Stats and races and, heck, birthdays?"
"I find it rather impressive, actually. It could be seen as a true mark that you've found what you love." He chuckled, a deep earthy sound. "Did you know: there are twenty four point six miles of railroad track connecting Canterlot and Ponyville, including five thousand seven hundred and fifty tons of steel rail, nine thousand five hundred tons of spikes, crossties, and tie plates. Building it, ponies had to move eighty five thousand tons of rock, half of which was used as ballast."
"That," he told her, amused by her agape expression. "That, my dear, is a rather useless statistic to memorize. Compared to that, the birthdays of every Wonderbolt on the roster is rather normal, I think."
Dash snorted, not very lady-like, and laughed. "I guess so! What, you build that railroad or something?"
"In part," he answered, leaning over one of the safety rails and looking out off the edge of the Eros Dreaming. "But what matters is that I do what I love, and I think you will, too. Joining the Wonderbolts? A fine goal in life! I dare say, a pegasus of skill seeking a challenge could not find one better."
"I guess that's kind of the point, right?" Dash asked. "To aim as high as you can?"
"Exactly! Many ponies mistake ambition... for ego." Fancypants, by this point completely relaxed around her and feeling no need for pretense, stole a quick self-conscious look at his cutie mark: a trio of crowns. "There is a razor thin line between confidence and arrogance." He returned to her, blue eyes teasing. "So thin, I think, that many miss it entirely."
"Are you speculating on which side I'm on?" The brash element of loyalty winked, coincidentally covering up a faint blush. "You've never seen me fly for real!"
"That's true."
"Check this out!"
With a whoosh, Rainbow Dash took to the sky, adding the trill of flight to the heady high of the evening's festivities. She imagined herself in a Wonderbolt uniform, the announcer calling out to the world as she blasted ahead of another pegasus on her way to the finish line. How many ponies across Equestria would be betting on Rainbow Dash to win?
As she zipped back down, there was no roar of the crowd, but Fancypants did wave as she bombed past and curled up into a loop. Looking back, she could see that she'd ruffled his cerulean blue mane. Good. He looked better without being so Canterlot-refined. The monocle could stay, though, and the bow tie. They were both pretty cool.
He - he was actually pretty cool.
'For a stuffy unicorn from Canterlot,' she thought. Landing on a perch just over the door, Rainbow Dash smiled down at him. 'He's Canterlot's coolest stallion, to hear Rarity gush on about it.'
"How about a bet?" she asked, struck by a sudden, crazy idea. It was her favorite kind of idea, actually.
"A bet?" He leaned his back against the railing, grinning beneath his moustache. "What do you have in mind?"
"I bet I'll make it into the Wonderbolts," she said, crossing her forelegs under her and draping them over the edge. "I bet you twenty thousand bits!"
"Twenty thousand bits, hmm?" Fancypants asked, seeming to consider it. Twenty grand had also been his biggest bet of the night. "Say I give it two to one odds. You'll need to sweeten the pot for me to take that bet."
"Yeah?" Dash's grin only grew wider. "I think I can do that."
"Really? Nopony else wants to come?" Rarity asked, her gathered friends finding various excuses to stare or pick at their breakfast. The weather had been faintly overcast for a few days, which was just as well, since the ship was between stops and cruising slowly over the ocean. It had taken more than a little effort just to get everpony up and down to the rear commissary for a late breakfast/early brunch.
"Oh. Oh, um. Sorry..." Fluttershy speared her grapefruit with a teeny tiny fork. Teal eyes meekly glanced up at the fashionista and then back down at her plate. "I'm not... much of a dancer..." And down went her ears, producing a look far too sweet and meek to argue with. “And those crowds...!"
Rainbow Dash bit into her croissant, chewing even as she said, "I don't mind dancing at a night club or something, but... yeah. Ballroom stuff? I'll pass."
"What about you, Twilight?" Rarity asked, eyes brightening. "You could wear that lovely violet dress!"
"I don't know," the other unicorn dithered, hiding behind her glass of orange juice. "I kind of had plans for tonight."
"Skygazing again?" Pinkie Pie asked, eyes narrowing as her neck stretched, inching her closer and closer to Twilight until they were almost nose-to-nose.
"Yes, again. And other things!" Twilight Sparkle pushed Pinkie back, hoof to forehead.
Rarity sighed at the lack of turnout. "What about you, Pinkie? Applejack?"
"Sorry! I've got a date!" Pinkie declared with an over-large grin.
"What!!" A chorus of mares cried, all at once.
"Same here, actually," Applejack admitted, to the less gobstruck stares of her friends. "But Rarity, ah totally know somepony who'd love to come with ya ta this ballroom tango thing!"
- -
Unbelievable.
Pinkie Pie and Applejack had dates? To top it off, even Fluttershy and Twilight seemed to be acting strangely the last few nights. If she, Rarity, didn't know any better, it was almost suspect. It very nearly called for an elaborate plan to unmask who her friends were sneaking off to be with. Even Twilight. There was no way anypony, even a fanatic bookworm, would want to spend every night at the observatory. The mystery definitely called for a little snoo-ping.
Later tonight, perhaps!
Easing open the door to the ballroom with a gentle push of magic, Rarity tried to put the potential dalliances of her friends out of her mind. Hard as that was. She had a glorious and devastatingly sexy red dress that she had brought along just for such a night and she intended to use it on the dance floor. Cascading ruffles ran along the skirt, split at the left leg, ending in an embellished chainette fringe, while bell sleeves opened just below her shoulders. The black satin heels were a bit indulgent, but she felt confident about dancing in them.
Now, she just had to see if the supposed date Applejack had set her up with panned out. Eyes scanning the couples already waiting in and around the ballroom, Rarity sighed inwardly. So many beautiful ponies were out there, the ladies in fine dresses (a few she even took note of for later) and the stallions in suits and tuxedoes.
Slowly making her way over to the sign up table to wait, she was surprised as a pony she didn't recognize approached her. He was a trim young stallion, maize yellow in color under a black tuxedo and white shirt. A bright green narrow string-tie around his collar matched eyes of the same color, but it was the cut and slightly curled mane, tangerine orange, that touched her memory.
"Miss Rarity!" he said, waving a hoof and ruining his dignified image with a goofy grin. "Howdy!"
"Braeburn?" Rarity could hardly believe how, well, how well he cleaned up. Somepony must've tied him down and worked him over like her life depended on it. "My word, I hardly recognized you!"
"Ah don't get'ta dress up like this very often, but ah'm here representin' Appleoosa-" And thankfully, he said the town name without too much aplomb. "-so I gotta look the part, ya know? Big city folks don't invest much if ya show up lookin' like ya just plowed a field."
"Of course, one must keep up appearances."
"Sure 'nuff," Braeburn agreed, and gestured with his head over to the sign up table. "Shall we?"
"Let's."
He led her over and, smartly wiping the pen with a napkin from his shirt pocket, signed his name onto the roster. He then dropped it from his mouth, cleaned it off, and handed it over. Though more than capable of signing her name with magic alone, Rarity thought to do so with an earth pony partner was a little impolite. Like a true gentlepony, he had cleaned the pen, so she delicately nipped it from his hoof and signed her name next to his.
"Miss Rarity," he said, as they walked together over to where the couples were assembling. "You'll pardon me fer bein' so forward, but boy-howdy, do you look pretty in that dress. It wouldn't be one'a yer designs, now would it?"
She couldn't help but blush at the compliment, batting her eyes. "As a matter of fact it is. You like it?"
"Ah sure do."
"Alright, everypony!" The dance coordinator, a pretty young mare in a black dance dress called out. "We've got eight out of ten signups! Let's start up."
A guitar and bandoneón piece began playing from the room's gramophone, with the upbeat tempo of the tango. It had a strong two-four rhythm, and as the eight couples took to the ballroom dancefloor, Rarity inhaled, swallowing some well veiled anxiety. Standing in place for a moment as Braeburn walked past her, to get some distance, she met his eyes. He seemed comfortable, but... well, the last time she had seen him dance had been Appleoosa's hoedown with the Buffalos.
"Ready?" he asked, holding up left hoof.
She nodded, and held up hers as well as she trotted up to him. As the music played, their hooves met and touched. He began to lead, right away, lifting her up so they could both stand. His free leg wrapped around her waist, and he wrapped hers over and then across, her elbow over his and her hoof to the back of his shoulder. A close embrace.
One, two steps and then a quarter turn, he led them back and then around in a quick spin. It wasn't anything too difficult, not to start with, as they moved around the room, getting their pacing and rhythm. Occasionally they broke routine from pausing or twirling at the four beat and stepping at the two, to moving across the dance floor on the four beat, right after a two, and then into another energetic two step. Near the end of the first dance, Rarity playfully lifted one leg, letting him hold her up as she leaned back, her slippered hoof stretching out before gracefully returning to the floor.
"You're quite good!" Rarity exclaimed, but then blushed a bit at how surprised she sounded. "Not that... well..."
"Aw, shucks. Don't worry none." Braeburn didn't seem to be offended by the implication. "Ah didn't think anypony knew this kinda dancin' up in Ponyville. I thought ya'll would be into Canterlot's brand'a stuff."
"The tango is quite the rage, even in Canterlot."
"Well, ah'll be!"
Smiling, he winked, giving her a little forewarning before spinning her around, holding her out hoof-to-hoof and letting her hang back on one leg. Then he reeled her back in, held her close and resumed the tempo of the dance.
"I simply have to ask: wherever did you learn to dance like this?"
"Back before ah settled down ta help found Appleoosa, ah worked as a cowpony on a estancia down south." He grinned and leaned closer to whisper, "The ladies wouldn't dance ta much else."
Around they went again, by now comfortable with their partner.
"Ah can see you've done this before, too."
"My own instruction was much more mundane than yours, I'm afraid," Rarity replied, their hooves stepping in time to the music. "I simply hired an instructor."
"Still, I reckon this is a lot easier fer me than it is you; hard 'nuff balancin' on two legs all the time without havin' ta do it in them heels."
"I'm sure by the end of the night, my ankles will feel like putty."
"Maybe Ah'll have ta carry ya around then?"
- -
"Ahhh. Miss Rarity? Remind me again, why we're doing this?"
"To satisfy our curiosity, of course!" Rarity tip-hoofed up the flight of carpeted stairs with all the stealthy prowess of her pet cat. Then again, Opalescence being Opalescence, maybe she was better compared to an actually stealthy pet... like Gummy.
"Besides," she whispered, peeking around the corner of the hall from behind a potted snake plant. "Twilight's up to something. Something she doesn't want us knowing about."
"Yes. But..." Braeburn peeked out right above her. "That still doesn't explain..."
"Oh, Braeburn, darling, you'll simply have to trust me on this. A juicy secret is like a perfect apple hanging from a tree... yes, you can admire it from afar, but sooner or later you have to pick it before it splits open or gets old."
The apple farmer, still in his tuxedo, raised an eyebrow.
"That... actually made sense, somehow."
"This way!"
Rarity zipped across the hall to the opposite side with surprising speed - it wasn't exactly easy for a pony to run around in high heels. Braeburn followed at a more relaxed pace, putting only a token effort into trying to keep out of sight. Rarity speared him with an upset moue for not playing along, but her attention was quickly distracted by the sight of Twilight Sparkle heading up another flight of steps.
One thing was clear: she wasn't headed for the observatory or the library.
"I knew something was up!" Rarity declared. ...Quietly.
On the next floor, the pair soon found a Twilight's destination: a small casual restaurant on the upper decks. It was one of the self-serve establishments lining both port and starboard sides of the ship's central castle. The smell of sautéed and barbequed food elicited a grumble from one of the dance partners turned spies.
"Oh. Terribly sorry." Rarity momentarily forgot her quarry and blushed at the rumbling of her stomach. "I do believe all that dancing has worked up an appetite."
Her blue eyes drifted back to the lobby of the restaurant.
"And since I'm quite certain Twilight had a coltfriend waiting for her in there, why not jump two steeples in one bound?" She was about to head over when Braeburn coughed.
"Miss Rarity," he said, and she paused to look back at him. "Ah don't think we should."
"Whatever do you mean?" the fashionable unicorn put on her best, most doe-eyed look. "All I want is a little peek...!"
Braeburn shook his head. "Ah'm not keen on spyin' on one of mah friends. Well... she's more yer friend than mine, but the principle's the same. If she's here ta meet some feller, she'll tell ya about him when she feels comfortable 'nuff about it. Till then, ya'll should respect her privacy."
"But...!" Rarity protested, her shoulders slumping. "Oh, you're right, of course. I'm just so frustratingly curious what she's up to and who she's meeting! I forgot myself."
"Why don't you and me find another restaurant, Miss Rarity?" Braeburn finally walked back up to her side and offered his front leg. "Since we're all dressed up already, ah reckon we should find the fanciest place on the ship and just enjoy ourselves."
Rarity was already in agreement, and was about to say as much, when Braeburn added, "My treat, of course."
"I do suppose I will have to let this mystery lie; how can I resist such an offer from such a gentlecolt?" Rarity held up her hoof and let him lead her back to the stairs. "Lead away."
They were halfway back to the stairs, when -
"You... do know where this restaurant is, yes?"
"Actually, ah'm not sure," Braeburn admitted with a sheepish grin. "Deck four maybe?"
Rarity sighed but rested her head on his shoulder. "I can wait."
Applejack moved through the convention grounds, a mare on a mission. The All Equestria Apple Convention occupied the entirety of four spacious halls within the ship during the day. Of those, two had to be cleared out every night for conversion back into the ship's main ballroom and dining hall.
Ponies from across the country had been gathered to present the latest in apple-related horticulture, postharvest methodology and physiology, and general arboriculture. There were panels of learned pony biologists and botanists giving lectures on everything from new disease-resistant parasprites to studies of invasive non-Equestrian species to panels on nutritional value of apples and discussions on using magic to improve soil conditions. Crop inspectors from Canterlot and pollination experts and wayward entomologists rubbed noses with plant breeders, ranchers and economists.
It was, needless to say, the most apple-tastic four nights in the Equestrian year!
Applejack had a spring in her step as she all but bounced, Pinkie-like, from one presentation hall to the next. For the first time in her life, she had been invited to give a lecture of her own on the second to last day of the convention. Her topic was none other than the rare Everfree Zap Apple, grown and cultivated exclusively by Sweet Apple Acres. In the meantime, her speech long since prepared and practiced, Applejack had enjoyed the full gamut of the convention, catching up with old friends and relatives she hadn't seen in years... or since the last con, anyway.
Humming to herself, she passed through the Production, Industry and Economics section of the Convention. There were all manner of farm equipment on display here, much of it not limited to just apple farming and distribution. A new fangled disk harrow caught her eye for a moment, and she wondered how Big Mac would take to it if she bought one for the farm. There was a surface-hardened steel plow she fully intended to sign up for, having been mightily impressed by refinements in the design and material science - it was high past time to retire the old wood and iron plow, and though he wouldn't like it, there were better harnesses available too that wouldn't choke her poor brother by putting so much force on his throat.
That wasn't why she was here, though.
"...and so you see, my friends, what makes our system unique - I say what makes it one of a kind! Is the innovational use of low pressure steam, yes low pressure steam, normally vented as exhaust-"
"Our patented magical recycler uses that low pressure steam in a process we call compounding - say it with me now, folks, compounding - increasing the efficiency of the press and reducing water consumption!"
"All thanks to the one-of-a-kind clockwork artificery-"
"Guaranteed for a lifetime of usery-"
"Backed by an unbeatable warranty!"
"And the incredible ingenuity!"
"Of the Brothers Flim and... and - Flam. Flam! Your line, Flam!"
It was a guilty pleasure to see first one, and then the other, brother stammer mid-routine at the sight of her. She hadn't even needed to do more than show up. A quick 'excuse us, folks' and Flim, the more talkative and outgoing of the tall unicorn stallion duo, resumed his discussion of mechanical features unique to their brand new "Cider Squeezy 7000." Apparently the 6000-model was already old hat thanks to a number of minor improvements. One problem remained for the brothers, which she had heard whispered on the apple branch.
The problem being that the current Super Speedy Cider Squeezy model was just a to-scale prototype.
Two pairs of green eyes darted back to her, just waiting for some sort of outburst or sales-ruining condemnation. Applejack just stood and listened to the brothers' pitch and presentation. The technical minutiae went over her head but she had enough of a ear for numbers to follow the discussion of throughput-output and cost versus production. The two tinkerers finished by giving out free samples of cider along with an demonstration of the workings of the machine through a see-through glass.
It really was remarkable what these unicorns could do with their technology. Yes, they had some within a hair's breath of taking her family farm from her, but that was one matter and this was another. Cider season was going to come around next year, and the year after that, and every year until one day they really were in trouble with out of town cider imports. Cider sales were the backbone of the farm between autumn and spring.
Applejack may have written the truth when she told Celestia that she hadn't learned anything about friendship that day, but she had learned a few things about business. Sweet Apple Acres wouldn't get in the same kind of trouble twice. Not on her watch.
"Thanks for coming, folks!" Flim heartily shook hooves with a botanist from Scandineighvia. "Drop by anytime for another free sample of our I-can't-beleiveably de-licious cider!"
Soon, she was the only one left.
"Cider not to your liking, Miss?" Flam asked, his expression turning markedly less welcoming when everypony else had departed.
"Brother!" Flim elbowed him as he at least tried to be amiable. "It's been a while, Miss...?"
"Applejack," she reminded him.
"Applejack," he said. "No hard feelings, right?"
Taking a long draught from her cider stein, Applejack licked her lips. "Correct me if ah'm wrong, now, but with how sweet this batch is, I do believe ah taste... Gala and Honeycrisp plus a little 'a somethin else..."
"Bramley," Flim said.
"And cinnamon?"
"Just a pinch."
"Not bad." Applejack finished her stein and put the empty glass on the table next to a half dozen others. "The mix you made with our apples was better."
The stallion had lost some of his discomfort talking about cider, but her comment quickly undid the ease he had accumulated. "Miss Applejack, about Sweet Apple Acres-"
"Not Flim-Flam Fields?"
"No." Flim sat down and idly scratched his cheek. "About that..."
"It was actually sorta impressive how ya talked yer way into getting us ta give you apples to compete against us," Applejack interrupted, her compliment leaving Flim rather dumbstruck.
"Ah-"
"It was?" Flam asked when Flim stuttered. "You're not angry, then, Miss?"
"Ah was pretty angry, yeah, you bet! Ah was darn proud'a when we drove you fellers outta down." Applejack noticed the brothers cringe a bit at the reminder of their hostile ejection from Ponyville. "But then, as Cider season drew to a close, ah started ta think more about what happened back then."
She tipped back her hat, huffing in vexation.
"Ah had to use a loophole ta compete with you two. Not only don't ah I like having ta be... well, it wasn't cheatin' but it was usin' the letter a' the rules against the spirit a' the rules. Luckily you two went along with it-"
"Admittedly, we were also lucky you let us use the south field," Flim reminded her.
"Point is, ah'm not the type ta ask mah friends ta pitch in fer free every year till ah'm Granny Smith's age," Applejack said, waving a hoof off to the side. "Ah've tasted the cider yer machine made. It was good, and not just because ya used our apples."
"On business," Applejack replied. "Ah want one of yer machines. Heck, I wanted one of em back then, too. Thought we could rent it, even."
"The problem, Miss Applejack, is that cider making is a niche market. My brother and I need capital with a big, fat, juicy 'C.'" Flim gestured back at the diagrams behind him. "That means makin' the most of the market while we can."
The apple farmer shook her head sadly. "And how's that goin' fer ya'll?"
Flim and Flam exchanged uncomfortable glances.
"It's... going places," Flim offered.
"Ahl-right, lemme spell things out fer ya." Applejack crossed her front legs, her tone all-business. "Sweet Apple Acres has never once, aside from the year you came by, produced enough cider for the town of Ponyville. Ah don't mind tellin' ya'll this, since ya know it already, and because no pony there will buy water from ya much less cider. But the honest and brutal truth is that we've never been able ta keep up with demand."
"And yet you control the town's entire supply," Flam observed. "Must be nice, having that little monopoly."
"We don't overcharge anypony," Applejack's reminder was punctuated by a critical glare that made the mustached unicron flinch. "That's just how our family does business: a fair price and no limit on what a pony can buy. Think of it as our business model. Ah ain't gonna change that, but ah'm sick and tired ah seein' my friends go thirsty!"
"I seem to recall one pegasus who was most animated about her lack of cider," Flim remembered. "So?"
"So, first, ah want ta fix the problem, which as ah see it, is in production and supply, not product or sales. Second, and this is important, ah need a cider and juice makin' machine that can do this new fangled pasturizin' thing."
"Heat pasteurization?" Flam inquired, a hoof up to his chin. His handlebar moustache almost seemed to curl a little as he thought. "We already have an integrated optional bypass for that in the 7000 model. The 6000 had it, too, but it slows output by fifty percent."
"Canterlot health regulations signed inta law this year require all new imports to the city to be pasteurized, includin' apple products and dairy, so there's that, too. Now," Applejack said with a deep breath bordering on a sigh. "We may've gotten off on the wrong hoof, but you two seemed like the unicorns to see for this stuff. Ah'm ah right or am ah wrong?"
Flim and Flam quickly ducked into a huddle, the twins murmuring as they conferenced.
"We can do it, no problem!" Flam declared.
"But there's still the matter of bits," Flim insisted. "We have overhead!"
"And lots of it, Flim!"
"That's right, Flam!"
"Maintenance and replacement parts!"
"Water and fuel!"
"Raw materials!"
"And then there's-"
"-personal expenses!"
Flim and Flam had, by this point, just about begun one of their routines. They had their forelegs crossed and hats off and everything, but before they could break into song and dance, Flim's good mood deflated. The hat returned to his head, and he dropped to the floor. Flam followed a moment later.
"There's also one other little problem," Flim said.
"Oh yes, that problem, brother," Flam agreed, momentarily forlorn.
"We may as well let her know, Flam."
"I'm sure she suspects it anyway, Flim."
"Our ingenuous machines-"
"All the ones that rely on apples-"
"From the Super Squeezy-"
"To the Picky Picker-"
"Need magic to work," Flim finished, pointing at his horn. "Our... magic... to be precise."
"Any other unicorn can supply the power," Flam explained. "But the products are, well, sub-par."
Rather than being upset, however, Applejack's grin broadened.
Why, it was almost downright predatory.
"Actually, ah gotta confess something, too, fellers," she walked up until she was between them, wrapping her forelegs around the shoulders of the two tall stallions. "Ya see, that little admission of yers? It was exactly what I was hopin' ta hear."
- -
"What do ya think, Flam?"
"I - I'm honestly not sure what to think, Flim."
"It's workin' ain't it?" Applejack stepped down from the treadmill, picking her hat off a rack on the end and flipping it nimbly over and onto her head. A quick pat and it was firmly back in place.
It was after hours, the day after she had re-ran into the innovative pair of unicorns. Per her request, Flim and Flam had reattached the manual starter for their prototype. It had been their idea to rig that to a treadmill for a more extensive test. A single line of lights overhead provided illumination in the otherwise hanger-like expanse of darkness that was the great showroom. Eight steins of fresh, frothy cider waited for them at the drip-feed output valve of the Super Squeezy 7000.
"Oh! Oh! I can't wait! I can't wait!"
The fourth member of their little group was what Flam called a 'control.' Obviously, he didn't know Pinkie Pie that well, since that was among the last words most ponies would use to describe the Ponyville's premier party planner. She had bounced along on the treadmill just before Applejack did, filling four of the steins.
"Stand back, Miss Pie, if you would!" Flam nodded to his brother. "Shall we, Flim?"
"Let's do it, Flam!"
The twins both faced their machine and concentrated, a bright green light shooting from their horns into the insulated stacks on the top of the cider making machine. It revved up without so much as a hiccup, a hoof-full of apples passing through the automated inspection window and into the processing center. Steam chugged and gears worked, grinding the apples into pulp and then straining them through a filter to remove seeds and stems. Flim and Flam could wring a lot of raw juice and pulp out of the mash, but their machine also expelled the remaining filtered matter post-processing. Applejack intended to change that, if things worked out here. It would easily be used for applesauce, a fact the duo had overlooked.
A belt moved on slotted wheels, filling another four steins.
"Can we drink it yet! Can we!"
"Miss Pie, please." Flam wagged his moustache, still a little uncomfortable with the adjustments to his precious machine, and now hassled by a pink pony trying to wrestle him to the floor to get at the cider. "You don't really think this will work do, you, brother?"
"I'm willing to consider it may, brother," Flim, more into the business and sales than the engineering, trotted over to the now twelve steins, divided into three sets. The apples had been the same, all from the batch the brothers had brought to the Convention to help showcase their invention. The only difference in production was the means: Pinkie Pie's hoofpower, Applejack's hoofpower, and the brother's magic.
"Ah'right now, Pinkie, just hold yer... horses," she had to keep from snickering at that last part. What a strange saying. She bodily picked the pink pony up off of Flam and set her down like one would a potted plant. "We'll get to the cider in just ah second."
"A second just passed!" Pinkie announced, lunging -
"In twenty five seconds then!" Applejack amended, plopping her back in place.
"Awww!"
"We got equal amounts of cider in each glass, right?" she asked.
Flim was already checking, eyeing each stein. "It looks like we do."
"Well, let's have our taste test, then!" Applejack picked up two of the first batch of steins, one for herself and the other for her friend. Pinkie eagerly snatched it up, smacking her lips and staring, mesmerized, at the cider inside.
"I - I just realized!" She punctuated her revelation with a dramatic and all-encompassing gasp. "This is the first, and potentially only, batch of cider ever made by me! If I had only known... if I only had some caramel and nutmeg and cinnamon and... ohhh!"
"There, there, sugarcube," Applejack said, heartily slapping the party pony on the back. "Ya'll helped us last year, remember! That Apple Family cider we made had a pinch of Pinkie Pie in it, too!"
Pinkie's bright blue eyes grew huge and sparkly. "Hey, yeah!"
"Ladies?" Flim held out his stein. "Brother?"
"That's right, brother. Ladies," Flam agreed, and the four toasted.
"Down the hatch!" Applejack joined in.
Pinkie Pie giggled, all smiles. "Cheers!"
Without further ado, they downed the cider control group. It was sweet and thick and fresh - in fact, it was probably too sweet. Applejack could see Flim and Flam exchange confused looks at the resulting product but Applejack just grinned to herself. Naturally it would be too sweet. It really was Pinkie Pie brand cider. It was still relatively soft, though, and a bit too watery without enough of a frothy head.
"Yummy!" said pink pony declared, finishing her stein.
"It was... fair," Flim judged.
"This is the same problem we always had with manual control of the Squeezy series," Flam explained, but still finished off his drink. "Inconsistent product output. It tastes like somepony put molasses in it."
"You seem to be enjoying it, Flam."
"Maybe a little," the moustached pony admitted with a cough. "But it'll never sell, Flim."
"We'll try ours next," Flim decided. A green glow enveloped the four steins down at the end of the table, floating them over to his brother and the two mares.
Four glasses meet in a quiet toast.
"Kanpai!" Pinkie injected, quickly gulping down her cider. The other three ponies present spared her a curious look but followed her lead.
As Applejack had expected, the Flim-Flam cider was quite drinkable. It had good consistency, a nice bite, and it was thick and flavorful. A little acidic, by her reckoning, but very uniform in density from the frosty head to the bottom of the stein. It was good cider. Applejack could admit that without shame: it was good. Heck and tarnation, she already knew it. She'd had quite a bit of it herself when the family inherited the barrels of good (and bad) cider the brothers had left behind in their hasty retreat from Ponyville.
Granny Smith herself - the most discerning and demanding palette Applejack knew - had, in the private of the Apple family home, admitted the brothers could grind and press a good drink, even with their fancy machine. She had also quietly expressed some surprise that a pair of unicorns could make drinkable cider at all (the unspoken connotation being 'with their magic instead of good hard work'). Thanks to her friends, Twilight and Rarity, Applejack knew better. Unicorns worked hard, too, in their own ways.
"Delicious!" Pinkie announced.
"It is good," Applejack said, voicing her thoughts. "One last set, now."
Flam frowned a bit as Flim floated out the final four cider steins. He was skeptical that there would be any difference between Pinkie's cider and her own. He had built the manual drive system, after all, not really expecting it would have to be used in anything but an emergency. Applejack already knew she was right, though. Flam would be tasting the proof soon enough. Flim, though, glanced down at the cider in his glass with ambivalence.
"Miss Applejack-" he began to say, but then stopped himself. Holding up the stein, he toasted, "Bottoms up, everpony."
The four steins clattered together.
"Na zdrowie!" Pinkie cheered.
"What... language was that...?" Flam gaped, staring at the pink mare.
Pinkie was already drinking, though, so no answer was forthcoming. Down the hatch the cider went as the other three drank. Applejack tasted her success in that last batch of cider. It was the taste of Sweet Apple Acres: hearty and rich and thick, pulpy and fruity but not too sweet, with a little bite that stick to your cheeks. It had come out harder than the other two, even to an inexperienced taster. Addictively good, very quickly all four steins were bone dry.
Flim was the first to speak. "Wow. Brother?"
"Unexpectedly good, brother-o-mine," Flam admitted, wiping a bit of froth from his bright red moustache. "I just can't believe how... how much of a difference it made."
"Ah thought as much," Applejack said, and all three ponies turned to wait for Pinkie's critique.
To their surprise, Pinkie was silent, staring down at her empty stein.
"Miss Pie?" Flam inquired, tilting his head. "Are you-"
"MORE!" Pinkie roared, shaking Applejack by her shoulders. "I've had a taste, but I need more! Don't hold out on me, Applejack! Just - just one more! We can make it right now!"
"Ahlright, ahlright, I promise," Applejack barely got the words out as her friend shook her whole body, hooves to hat. One hoof on said hat and another on Pinkie's head managed to calm the silly pony. "Just give us a couple minutes first."
Pinkie responded with a trademark pout, but perhaps realizing the situation, she bounced back and instead busied herself by inspecting the clockwork contraption that was the Cider Squeezy. None of them had gotten much of an up close look at it before during the contest at the farm. Even after hearing about its innards and 'steam compression power' and pistons and whatever, it was a guilty pleasure to see it whirr and chug and do its thing.
"Well, Flam?" Flim turned to his brother. "I do believe Miss Applejack here has us over the proverbial barrel."
"Some sort of unique element to her natural magic, Flim!" Flam took a moment to watch Pinkie try and fiddle with a dial on the front of the machine. She wasn't doing any harm so far, but he kept an eye on her. "I'm not sure how she knew the results ahead of time, though."
"Ain't no fancy experimentation to it," Applejack answered, walking up to Flim and pointing to his cutie mark: a slice of apple. "Just as simple as that..." And then she pointed to the trio of apples on her flank. "And this."
"When I thought about it," she continued. "Ya could've built that machine ta do most anythin. Ya came lookin' fer apples, specifically ta make apple cider. It's all in the cutie marks, and yers aren't a gear or cog or star or anythin' I've seen on a unicorn pony before."
Flim frowned and Flam turned away completely in favor of watching Pinkie Pie try and stick her head into the Cider Squeezy's feeding tube. That was probably safe.
"You're right, Miss Applejack," Flim finally replied, though he didn't sound happy about the admission.
"Flim," Flam snapped. "We don't..."
"We do, Flam." Flim stopped his brother there. "We do. She may as well know, if we're going to work together."
- -
"Do you know what they call this apple, Miss Applejack?" Flim floated over a sliced half of the fruit in question. The skin was like red etched over orange.
"Ah recognize it," Applejack took the snack in-hoof and bit off a good half of it with a crunch. "It's a Cameo Apple, right? Ah hybrid mix ah Red Delicious and Golden Delicious."
"You do know your apples."
"Ah'll take that as a compliment," Applejack finished the apple off with one more bite before flicking away the stem.
It tumbled over the railing, over the edge of the ship, and into the inky blackness that was the drop below. They were overlooking the side of the Eros Dreaming, close to one of the massive twined cables that connected the body of the ship to the starboard flight envelope. The parallel lines of yellow and black clashed with the night sky above.
"I noticed your little sister, the filly with the red hair, she didn't have her cutie mark when we visited your town."
"-she still doesn't."
"They say a cutie mark can be almost anything, but you must've noticed that some marks run in some families," Flim's voice had lost its usual energetic sales pitch. Two peach-yellow hooves hooked over the edge of the railing. "Engineering ran in our family. It was a respectable and proper profession for a unicorn, and we were proud of it. Everypony expected us to have a screw or a piston or a wrench for our cutie marks."
He shook his head at what came next; even Applejack could guess where his story was leading.
"One trip to an apple orchard, and..." Flim softly tapped a hoof against the railing. "You know what happened. After that, we built a picker, first, since we couldn't get the whole apple bucking thing down. I assume only earth ponies can manage it with any real proficiency. Nothing we did worked as well as our apple machines. We didn't own a farm, so we hit the road and built our first Cider Squeezy."
He clearly thought about saying more, but held his tongue. There was no need for more. Only: "Your farm was the first to go as far as it did. Looking back, I don't think we'd even thought that far ahead."
Applejack rested her own legs up on the railing next to him. "Ah had mah test. Ah can use yer Cider Squeezy and I'm willing ta pay ya royalties on the cider ah sell."
"That older mare, ah..." he tried to remember the name.
"Granny Smith."
"Something tells me she won't much like you bringing home one of our machines."
"We need a pasteurizer, and she knows I'm buyin' one," Applejack smirked, having already run the resulting argument over in her head. "Ah never said what ah wouldn't buy. Heck, Ah'm sure Granny probably won't like it at first, but she'll come around. Big Mac, too, once he runs the numbers. In the end, Ah'm the one who runs Sweet Apple Acres, so it's mah decision ta make."
"Why can't you make enough cider for all of us?" she asked, the words verbatum from one of her friends, very nearly left out of the cider harvest year after year. "Ah'm not gonna hear those words ever again. They'll be enough cider for everpony this year. Enough to spare to even sell in Canterlot."
Flim was watching her with a guarded but expectant expression. "And my brother and myself?"
"We do need mechanics who understand apples... and a couple hired hooves." Canny green eyes fixed him in her stare. "Who knows what else ya'll might invent?" She held out her leg and spat into the frog or palm of her hoof. "Ya think we can work somethin' out, Flim?"
He didn't hesitate to mimic the act and take her hoof. "I believe so, Miss Applejack."
They shook, heartily, and resumed staring out over the railing.
"We'll need a workshop."
"Ya'll can refit one of our old barns, but of course it' won't be free."
"And room and board? Is there even a place that will have us in your fair town?"
"Ah can think of a place... long as ya don't mind hay and early mornin's."
"Watch in awe, fillies and gentlecolts, as the Great and Powerful TRIXIE performs yet another feat of prestidigitation!"
Up on stage, a baby blue mare with a lighter shade of mane gestured dramatically into the air, gossamer lights and sparkling fire wheeling around her as she spun in place. Glowing with the tell-tale signs of unicorn magic, a long trough slid out from the right side of the sage and a low glass duplicate on the left. In the latter case, it was easy to see the bin was filled with clear blue water.
Trixie held up a hoof to her ear as she faced the audience.
"What's that?" she asked, making a display of listening not just to part of the audience, but to the entire crowd assembled in the theater. "Trixie can't hear you! You'll have to speak up!"
The crowd roared in a mix of cheers and shouts.
"You're telling the Great and Powerful TRIXIE that you know this trick?" She gasped and drew back, as if shocked. "That walking on water will not impress you?" With a swoop of her cloak, she revealed only her dark purple eyes. "Whatever is to be done, then? Think, Trixie, think! Ah HA!"
The showmare gave a sweeping motion of her hoof, and the glass tank floated higher and higher into the air, all while the metal trough rolled under it. A pair of pegasus assistants - mares in skimpy black costumes - quickly flew over, hitching the glass tank to a series of ropes hanging from the ceiling. Trixie's horn lost its magical glow as one of them gave the signal that the water tank was safely in place.
"A different sort of water walking then!" Trixie declared, pumping her legs as she ran in place. A few ponies in the audience whistled and Trixie took the occasion to strut around, showing off her figure with a few athletic flips and twirls. Shrugging off her cape and hat, she pointed up at the hanging glass water tank.
"The Great and Powerful TRIXIE is ready!" she announced, and her assistants tipped over the tank, releasing a torrent of rushing water. The veritable waterfall cascaded down and into the trough, splashing everywhere. A few audience members whinnied and jumped as some of the spray hit them; the rest of the audience cheered in approval. Everypony could see the water flowing out of one tank and then splashing into the trough below.
"Here she goes!"
Taking a galloping start, Trixie jumped right into the waterfall -
But instead of going through it, her hooves stuck to the rushing water! One leg over another, she scaled the waterfall, her face and mane getting visibly wet for her trouble. It was like watching a pony climb a rope, except the rope was running water. The crowd ooh'd and aah'd as she seemed to slip, falling a few inches before catching herself. Then it was back up the waterfall, right to the top.
Climbing at last onto the rim of the water tank, Trixie straddled the makeshift waterfall.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie!" a well dressed stallion announced as he ran to the center of the stage, a festive towel in his hooves. The crowd cheered again, clopping their hooves as the water tank lowered back down to the ground. For her part, Trixie didn't wait for it to descend more than half way before jumping through the air and into the outstretched towel. Drying herself off as the stage reset, she swept her foreleg across the audience.
"Thank you, thank you!" She tossed back her mane and walked up to the edge of the stage. "Now for everypony's favorite part of the evening! The audience challenge! Is there anypony out there tonight who thinks he or she has what it takes to out-dazzle the Great and Powerful TRIXIE?"
A dozen legs shot into the air as ponies stood, jumped, or even flew to get her attention.
"There must be somepony out there...!" Trixie pretended not to see them, only to keep scanning the audience. "If you want Trixie to pick you, you'll have to be a little louder!"
"OH! OH! OH ME! ME ME ME! OH! PICK ME!"
"You, sir!" Trixie winked, and a rose appeared in the hoof of a blue coated stallion, much to the annoyance of one bright pink audience member.
"Yes!" The cobalt pegasus, egged on by his wife, flew up onto the stage.
"And who are you, sir?" Trixie asked, floating over a microphone from off stage.
"Boulder Dash!"
"And you are blue," the showmare muttered, taking another look over the audience. "You wouldn't be related to another pegasus with a rainbow colored mane...?"
"No ma'am!" Boulder Dash grinned at the audience, waving to one enthusiastic mare with a camera.
"Well, then, what is your special skill?" Trixie asked, back to her usual showmare-level confidence. "TRIXIE shall match it with ease!"
"I break rocks off of mountainsides, ma'am," the stallion replied with a snicker. "Just like my name."
"I see! I don't think even the Great and Powerful TRIXIE can conjure up a mountain for us to break open-" Trixie paused for the laughter of the audience. "-but we may have something backstage. And here come Trixie's lovely assistants now!"
With a heave, the two skimpily attired pegasi pushed and pulled a stone block onto the stage.
"Why don't you show us what you can do?" Trixie prompted, trotting past the stone block and waving away her assistants.
"Sure thing!" Boulder Dash lifted off, and hovering in place, started to gather up water into a cloud overhead. Electricity began to crackle among the billowing innards of the cloud, building up until -
With a crack, a bolt of lightning hit the block of stone, splitting it down the middle!
The crowd clopped their hooves in approval, and even Trixie joined in, though very slowly and with choreographed haughty dismissal. A quick 'thank you' and she ordered the stallion back. She had some weather magic of her own, enough to even summon and charge up a lightning cloud... but no pony just wanted to see the same thing done twice, even if she thought she could put enough juice into it to break what was left of the stone.
Instead, her horn glowed and her eyes shut in concentration. Unlike the 'climbing waterfall' trick, this one was just a matter of the right spell and the right amount of power. Pieces of the blasted rock floated through the air and shot back together, arranging and slotting up like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. The hardest part was soon over: putting the stone block (mostly) back together.
The crowd began to applaud, but she wasn't done.
Another spell, right after the first, so quickly it was like she hadn't paused in between - a flash of light, plus a loud clap of thunder, created the visual illusion of lightning without a cloud. Under that cover, in the moment when ponies averted their eyes, she used a simply division spell to roughly cut the block in half. It was actually quite draining, but the experienced showmare didn't let even a little strain show as she twirled for the audience, her cloak swishing around her.
Now, finally, she could use the more visible magic - unicorn telekinesis - to add a little spectacle to the show. Wrapping the two halves of rock in the glow of her magical field, Trixie directed them off the cart to spin around Boulder Dash, forcing the poor stallion to duck down and cover his head. A few revolutions, combined with a few theatrical pyrotechnics, and she flew the halves back over to the cart.
"Let's give Boulder Dash a hoof of applause, everypony!" Trixie said, not needing a microphone for her voice to carry to every corner of the theater. Extending a hoof to help the stallion back onto his hooves, she even planted a quick kiss on his cheek, much to the delight of the crowd... and the flustering of the pony's wife.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie thanks you for your attempt," she said, walking him back to the end of the stage. "But alas, don't give up your day job! Anypony else? One more!"
"MEEEEEE!!!!"
Four exclamation marks worth of pleading couldn't help but grab Trixie's attention. There was a pink earth pony standing on the edge of her chair, her mane poofed up like some sort of equine imitation of cotton candy. Her legs spun in dizzying circles as she either tried to keep balanced or just outdo the rest of the room in pure energy. Trixie hesitated to pick her on that alone. The hyperactive ones, the ones really, really eager to get on stage, were often also the ones planning to do something inappropriate or bizarre. It was just a fact of life on the stage.
Plus... there was just something a little ominous about this one...
Against her better judgment, Trixie could also see that the crowd seemed to be cheering for the crazy pink pony. The ponies around here had lowered their legs and started cheering for her to be picked. Trixie could sense it in the air, and what the crowd wanted, the crowd got.
"You, Miss!" Trixie pointed dramatically to the pink pony, wasting only a few more seconds in a production of searching the theater for a target.
"WOO-HOO!" One grasshopper-like bounce and she went from her seat to the stage, tucking into a confetti sprinkling ball along the way. That was... odd. Did she have confetti in her mane? It sure hadn't been in her hooves.
"And who may you be?" Trixie asked, floating over the microphone. "Let Trixie guess: your name is 'Sugar Rush?'"
"No! But that IS a great name!" the pony smiled to the audience, gleefully waving one leg in the air. "Hiya, everypony! My name is Pinkie Pie!"
"And what, pray tell, is your special skill?" Trixie directed a small sparkling light overhead, exploding it into a glittering cloud behind them.
"Ohhhh!" Pinkie's expression became coy, her eyes lidded. "I don't need my special skill to do something I bet you can't do."
Trixie's hackles immediately caught on the remark, but she kept up her facade. It had been a while since anypony challenged her on stage... well, anypony who she hadn't invited to do so ahead of time and as part of the act, anyway. Covering her thoughts with a noblemare laugh, Trixie tipped her wizard hat, flipped it end over end through the air, caught it, and retrieved a small juice box from inside. It was just a bit of trickery, but used on the fly it always delighted ponies. It was also useful for killing a bit of time and making a little show.
"Well, well, well!" she told the audience, sipping noisily from her juice box before tossing it to the crowd. "The Great and Powerful TRIXIE is all ears. What did you have in mind?"
"I'll need a prop," Pinkie said into the microphone.
"Trixie will humor you, so long as you do not bring anything too dangerous on stage." She winked at the audience. "You aren't going to swallow firecrackers or needles, are you?"
"I need a cake."
"A cake?" Trixie turned to the right side of the stage, a pair of long-burn fireworks spiraling wildly through the air at her command. They shot all across the stage and overhead before popping into twin sprays of harmless sparks. Just as her two assistants brought out a large single-tiered cake, covered in whipped cream, chocolate shavings and cherries.
"Can you cut it in half?" Pinkie asked, still toting the microphone in one hoof.
"Foal's play!" Trixie's horn glowed, telekinetically retrieving a sword from off stage. With a showy spin, she used it to slice the cake into two neat halves. With another artistic flourish, the sword bobbed and weaved off stage, 'bowing' to the audience as it made its exit.
"Let's see if you can do... THIS!" Pinkie stomped a hoof, on the stage, not even on the platter of the cake, and half of it flipped end over end through the air -
Onto her outstretched tongue.
A second later, both tongue and cake-half disappeared, the former retracting back into the pink pony's mouth. Trixie could only stare, instinct and experience alone keeping her jaw from going slack. Had she missed some slight of hoof, or had... had this pony just consumed half a cake in the time it took to nip the head off a flower?
"Mmmm! Black forest cake! Super Delicious!" Pinkie did a happy little pirouette and bowed to the cheering audience. "Thank you! Thank you!"
"Oh ho ho ho ho!" Trixie chortled, quickly deflecting Pinkie's applause and attention with her act. "A simple parlor trick! The Great and Powerful TRIXIE is not so easily impressed!"
Facing the remaining half-cake, Trixie felt her left eye twitch out of sight of the crowd. She still had no idea how the other pony had done it, eating something the size of her own head... like some kind of pink anaconda... but she could do this. All she had to do was make the cake vanish without being obvious about it. That wasn't so hard. Not for the Great and Powerful TRIXIE!
Rearing up, front legs pedaling, she stomped down, hard.
A discrete burst of magic sent the cake half flying - spraying a bit more whipped cream than she would have preferred - but still flying into the air. Watching it tumble, end over end, Trixie seriously considered trying to eat the thing. It was lunacy, but...
No, no. The risk of making a foal of herself was too much. Instead, she stepped back and tipped her wizard's hat. The cake fell right in and vanished without a trace. Trixie smirked, artfully flipping the hat through the air and back onto her head, snugly in place over her horn.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie, sadly, also has to watch out for her great and powerful figure!" she explained, to the audience's delight and approval. Thankfully. It never hurt to inject a little sex appeal into her shows. The theater filled with the sound of hooves clopping on polished mahogany.
"Aww. What a waste of perfectly good cake!" Pinkie bemoaned the fate of the lost pastry. "One more trick!"
As if! "Ah, now, now - I think you've had enough fun -"
"One more! One more! One more!" The audience, sadly, didn't share Trixie's inclination to get the competition off stage. There was only room for one spotlight per show, after all. "One more! One more!"
The crowd wanted it, so...
"If the Great and Powerful TRIXIE's fans demand it!" she extorted, indulging the crowd with a bow. She frowned at the pink mare. "...one more."
This was getting out of hoof.
The pink pony seemed to know how to play to a crowd, albeit in an amateurish sort of way. Was it that bouncy, bubbly personality? Was it the candy-cane sweet voice? The audience seemed to be eating this pink pony up. Cracking a joke about cakes and "empty calories" she asked for a table and a set of cups. Trixie's instincts were warning her to try and come up with a counter trick. Was this earth pony hustling her, on her own stage?
"The old vanishing balls in a cup, trick?" Trixie asked, sharing a laugh with the audience. "How old fashioned! Trixie recalls playing this game as a foal!"
Pinkie stuck out a bright pink tongue, making an annoyingly adorable 'nyaah' sound.
"I've got something much better than some boring balls!" She leaned towards the crowd, wiggling her eyebrows. "Can anypony guess what it is?" Her lips pinched together into a perfect 'o' as she listened to the shouts of the audience. "I heard cupcakes!"
"B-uu-t..." Pinkie reached a hoof into her mane. "I don't think I have any cupcakes left! Ummm... OH! Here's something good!"
Trixie watched, nonplussed, as the pink pony pulled three plates out of her hair. How - how was she...? Disgusting! A magic hat was one thing, a magic mane was another!
"Strawberry jam swiss rolls!" Pinkie licked her lips and tossed all three over to the table Trixie's assistants had brought out. Twirling like a top, she spun her way over to one side of the table, three rolls on three plates, with three large cups next to each one.
Snorting in disdain, Trixie made her way over as well.
"You know," she warned in a low, quiet voice. "Trixie will see you when you try to palm those rolls. This is the oldest trick in the book."
Pinkie just giggled. "Ready?"
"Trixie shall let you begin whenever you wish."
Sitting on her haunches, the showmare put on an unconcerned expression and posture, even as she sharpened her eyes and carefully watched the other mare. Pinkie slowly put one cup on top of each dish, covering up the slices of swiss roll.
"I missed your last show, you know." She nimbly switched two of the plates, just getting started; just warming up for the trick to come.
"At Hoofington?" Trixie asked, playing along. Conversation was part of the street magic. She knew it well enough herself. She had cut her teeth on street magic. "Canterlot Plaza? Or..."
"Ponyville."
"Oh. That town." Trixie's eyes watched Pinkie's hooves shuffle the plates, occasionally raising one of the cups to show that the roll was still there. "Did those two little idiots ever drag anything worse to the village? A black dragon, maybe?"
"Well... Snips and Snails didn't do anything bad after you left, but we did get attacked by Parasprites."
"Parasprites?"
"And a sleepy dragon."
"..."
"And Discord. Oh! And we had an outbreak of cutie pox! And the dam broke and the town was nearly flooded! And then another dragon rampaged through town, but he wasn't really himself at the time." Pinkie's conversation grew faster and more animated as she jumped from one disaster to another. "And there was this time when Twilight went back in time because she was worried about the future and there was a time loop or a paradox and she thought the world was going to end and..."
Pinkie's hooves stopped, hovering over the two end cups.
"And... how many rolls are there under these cups again?" she tilted her head to the left, big blue eyes full of what genuinely seemed to be confusion. "I forget."
"Urggh!" Trixie groaned, both at the distracting pink pony and at herself. She had been watching for palms, but even then, all that talk had distracted her. Especially mention of that 'Twilight' pony. The very same who had vanquished the Ursa Minor.
Still -
"The Great and Powerful TRIXIE has seen through your little trick!" she declared, pointing to the center cup. "All three are under the middle! Trixie can see the chocolate and strawberry stains on your hooves!"
"Ohhh! Oops!" Pinkie licked her hooves clean, much to Trixie's disgust. "Mmm!"
"Such foal's play!" Trixie's magic seized the three cups, lifting them off the platters. "Did you really think - wha-aa-ah!?"
All three plates were empty.
"Oh yeah!" Pinkie turned to the crowd, shrugging helplessly. "I remember now! I ate all three of them! Sorry, everypony!"
For just a moment, Trixie's vision turned red. Not pink. Red. How - how had she missed this cherry chatterbox not only palming all three rolls, but eating them?! Sputtering, her mind raced to find some way to turn the tables on her challenger: to humiliate her before she won over the audience.
The sound of laughing and hooves clopping snapped her out of thoughts of revenge.
Before she knew what was happening, the pink mare had taken one of her hooves in a hearty hoofshake. The tension ebbed out of Trixie's body as she realized, a little belatedly, that the crowd had enjoyed the show and that they were laughing in enjoyment and not in derision. The showmare took over, dispelling her inner turmoil and replacing it with the need to play to the audience.
"A splendid trick!" she declared, to applause. "The Great and Powerful Trixie salutes you!"
Taking off her hat, she briefly placed it on Pinkie's mane... only to pluck it off a second later, leaving a trio of doves behind. The birds took wing, signaling the end of the show. A bit of magic and the fireworks finale went off behind and in front of the stage, filling the air with sparklers and glitter-bombs. Bouncing off the stage, Pinkie returned to her seat and her table...
It took another pony pointing to her mane for her to realize something had been stuck into her pink curls.
- -
"I was about to say: you can have some... but I guess, help yourself?"
"Thanks!" Pinkie said around a mouthful of sweets and drop-candies. The very last one balanced cutely on the tip of her nose, her head bobbing left and right to keep it from falling.
Trixie raised an eyebrow in mixed annoyance and amusement. They were backstage; Pinkie had found the VIP pass not so subtly magiced into her mane and accepted the unspoken invitation after the show ended. The showmare returned to her couch, brush running through her pale blue mane.
"I didn't see any of your friends in the audience," she said, closing her eyes and relaxing in the post-show glow.
"My friends?"
"The farmer with the rope tricks, the rainbow pegasus, the unicorn with the fabric magic?" Trixie scoffed. "To say nothing of that little lavender powerhouse who handled the Ursa."
"Oooohhh!" Pinkie bounced over, still somehow balancing the last gum-drop on her nose. "Nope! I came here by myself!"
"Why?" the magician asked, plucking the sweet off the pink pony's snout.
"Well-ll-lll...!" Pinkie drew out the word for a vexingly long second or two. "I just wanted to see your show for myself! I didn't get to see you in Ponyville... I didn't even get to throw you a party!"
"Your friends didn't strike me as fans."
"Oh, they're not!" Pinkie assured her and Trixie coughed at the brusque response. "They don't like you much at all! They told me you were a big, smelly, no-good braggy-pants!"
Trixie frowned at the other mare. "Then why-"
"Everypony else thought you were funny!" Pinkie said with an innocent grin, popping out and over the back of Trixie's couch. "They said you put on a good show, even if you did... um... not get along with someponies. When I saw that you were putting on shows here, I just had to come see for myself!"
"And?"
Pinkie stuck out her lower lip in a pout. "Well, you are a braggy-pants, that's for sure! I don't think I could get away with calling myself the Great and Powerful Pinkie Pie!"
"Of course not!" Trixie declared with an imperious laugh.
"You messed up in Ponyville, but you're still doing the same thing." The party pony had a different smile as she spoke, one of admiration. "Making ponies happy." Then, tapping her chin and rethinking it, she added, "And making some ponies angry, too..."
The showmare closed her eyes and resumed brushing her hair. "It pays the bills. So..." she asked at length, "I don't have to worry about anypony making a scene while I'm on stage?"
"Nope!"
"Good."
The brush in her mane paused, wavering in her magic, as something else occurred to the magician.
"You're going to be at my next show, aren't you?"
"Yep!" Pinkie still hung onto the back of the couch. "I really, really loved being up there! The roar of the crowd! The bright lights! The cheers and the smiles! Nothing makes me happier than making other ponies happy! That's my special talent, you know! I just didn't want to spoil it when you asked me earlier!"
"... is that so?" Trixie's right eye opened a crack. She popped the last gumdrop candy into her mouth as she considered something. "Will you have a new trick for Trixie tomorrow?"
Pinkie's impish grin grew half again in size. "Will you let me up on stage?"
"You are strangely entertaining."
Her giggle proved infectious, and soon Trixie was laughing as well.
- - - NEXT (7) Epilogue (aka "Is that who I think it is?") - - -
