Birthday Game Shenanigans

by BulletCat

First published

A collection of stories based off of Birthday games.

Stories written from birthday games on derpibooru. My first time writing stories. I'm working on my writing and storytelling skills. I will write all stories except mature content. Constructive criticism appreciated.

The Dentist

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Pinkie was terrified. Her Pinkie Sense had been acting up since she woke up with buzzings in her gums all day long, and that only meant one thing. It was time for her dentist appointment. Just then there was a knocking on the door. "Pinkie! It's time for your dentist appointment!" Tylor called out from the other side of the door. Panicing, Pinkie dove under her bed. Desperately trying to avoid that which she feared the most.

Opening the door Anon entered Pinkie's room. He was a human about twice the size of Pinkie. He was light skinned and had dark brown hair that stopped just short of his dull green eyes. He quickly noticed the trembling ball of pink cotton candy protruding from under Pinkie's bed. "C'mon, Pinkie. The dentist isn't that awful."

"Yes it is!" The small pink ball of energy yelled out from under the mattress. "She's the meanest, nastiest pony in all of Equestria! She pokes your teeth with all those mean metal pokers! And if if you teeth aren't good enough for her she drills into them! And then she tells you you can't eat any sweets for 4 whole hours!"

"One: Really? Colgate is meaner than Sombra?" Tylor deadpanned as he tried to pull Pinkie out from under the bed. "You threw a 'New-Office-Warming-Party' for her just the other day. And maybe if you took better care of your teeth, then she wouldn't have to keep giving you fillings." Anon pulled on her tail in an attempt to get her out, but Pinkie remained there as if she had glued herself to the floor. "And if you don't do this then you'll probably loose all your teeth and have to live off of pudding for the rest of your life. Do you want that?"

"No!" Pinkie screamed as yanked her tail away from the human."I'm not going and that's final!"

Tylor sighed as he rubbed his temples, trying to come up with a way to get Pinkie to go. Smirking as a devious plan formed itself in his mind he moved to the door. "Well then I guess I'll just have to eat all those cupcakes by myself."

"What?! Cupcakes!?" Pinkie exclaimed as she poked her head out from under the bed befor rushing towards the exit. Only to run head long into the door that Tylor had just closed.

"Sorry, Pinkie." He apologized as he picked up the dazed mare and threw her over his shoulder. "But I promised the Cakes that I would make sure you got to the dentist." Pinkie started to thrash, yell, and plead as Anon started to walk out of Cupcake Corner.

The walk towards the office was long and grating on Tylor's ears, back and dignity. Here he was simply trying to get Pinkie to the dentist as she yelled at him for "being a meanie pants," pounded on his back in an attempt at escape and constantly begged ponies that they passed to save her from the horrible mean things that awaited her. Fortunately most ponies were aware of events like this every few years of someone, usually the Cakes, having to literally drag her across Ponyville to Colgate. Those that didn't know about this phenomenon simply had to be told it was the dentist and offered their condolences befor heading on their way.

"Hello Tylor."

Anon turned to the voice that greated him to see a purple unicorn trotting up to him.

"Hey Twili-""Twilight! Help! I'm being taken against my will to a place of torture and pain!" Pinkie called around the human as she struggled harder to escape.

"Is it Pinkie's appointment already?"

"Yup. Cakes talked me into doing it this year. They were busy with the twins and I think didn't want to deal with this this year."

"Twilight don't just stand there! Help!" This time saying befor biting Tylor.

"EEYOUCH" Tylor cried befor tossing away Pinkie out of reflex. Almost befor she hit the ground Pinkie had already taken off down one of the many streets in Ponyville.

"Aww, crap." He mumbled as he rubbed the bite on his back. "Now I gotta go find her all over again!"

"Want some help?" Twilight offered.

Tylor considered it. Twilight had magic which would almost certainly come in handy for capturing Pinkie if not actually finding her. And even then, having another set of eyes to help search was almost a necessity for someone who could pop out of everywhere and everything.

"Would you?" He half asked half begged.

"Sure. Let's start with Fluttershy."

Tylor and Twilight had search all over town. No one had seen Pinkie since this morning. Needless to say, they were frustrated.

"Where is that Pony?" Twilight asked sitting on the bench to take a load off her hooves. They had been searching for hours and no one, not even Rainbow Dash, had seen her.

"I dunno." Tylor was standing next to the bench watching the clouds and trying to think of where could Pinkie be. They had checked everywhere. Everyone in Ponyville they could talk to had said no. They had even checked in bowls of various objects, half expecting the physics defying Pinkie to be in them. The only places they hadn't checked were Colgate's office and back at Sugarcube Corner.

"Aww, crap." Tylor said face palming.

"What?"

"We didn't check Sugarcube Corner,"

Twilight's eyes widened befor planting her own hoof in her face.

"Come on. Lets go check."

"Pinkie! Get out of there!" Tylor yelled pulling on Pinkie's hind legs as he tried to pull her back out from under her bed with Twilight's help.

"No! Go away! I'm not going!"

"Pinkie it's for your own good!" Twilight stated as she used her magic pull the living sugar high out from under her bed.

"NO!" Pinkie yelled befor rushing towards the door when Twilight had managed to pull her out enough for Tylor to try to get a hold of her. The door slammed shut in front of her as she skidded to a stop but that only slowed her down for a second as she quickly took off for open window. But that was quickly slammed shut by Tylor. Pinkie huddled in the center of her room surrounded by Twilight and Anon. She Made one last attempt for a different window befor Twilight's Telekinesis took a hold of here.

"No! Put me down!" Pinkie yelled as she struggled fruitlessly against the magic holding her.

"Come on. We're late already."Tylor stated before leading Twilight out the door.

Finally at the Dentist office, Pinkie was now being strapped down to the chair by Colgate as Twilight held her down.

"Thank you for getting Pinkie over here. She's always been giving me trouble." Colgate said tightening one of the bond on Pinkie's left hoof.

"Do you normally have to strap her down like that?" Tylor asked. Slightly dubious of the leather straps currently holding Pinkie to the chair.

"All the time." Colgate said as, with Twilight's help, she fitted a device in Pinkies mouth to keep it open."She thrashes around so much that it's mostly to keep her from accidentally making us hurt her." Pinkie moaned loudly as Twilight walked off with the device was finally fitted.

"Thanks for the help Twilight.I owe you for this." Tylor said before Twilight left.

"Dont mention it Anon. I was glad to help." She said flashing a smile at him before trotting out the door.

Tylor looked up from the magazine he had been reading in the waiting room as Pinkie and Colgate walked into the room. Pinkie looked slightly upset but otherwise all seemed good.

"So," Colgate started "Pinkie was much better this time around. No cavities and no decaying enamel anywhere. However there was alot of plaque buildup, so I want her to brush more often. Other than that, she's good to go." Tylor handed over the bag of bits that the Cakes had given him to pay the Dentist with and walked Pinkie out the door.

Pinkie was uncharacteristically silent on the way back home. As well as more controlled, not bouncing down the street.

"That was some good news from Colgate wasn't it Pinkie?" He said trying to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Yeah." She said looking at Tylor a little dubiously.

"Pinkie, I'm sorry I had to drag you all the way over here, but it's important to take care of your teeth. Do you not wanna be able to eat another cupcake again?"

She looked away, down at the ground. They walked on in silence for a little ways befor she finally answered "No."

"I thought so." He said. "And hey, look at it this way, if the news that Colgate gave you isn't enough to throw a "I-have-good-teeth-party" then I don't know what is."

Pinkie immediately perked up at the mention of party and started bouncing again.

"Yeah! The cake can be a big tooth, and we can play pin the toothpaste on the toothbrush, and have mouthwash flavored punch, and..."

"So am I forgiven?"

"For now. Meanie Pants."

Puppy Love

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A solitary unicorn was making his way through the Everfree Forest towards Ponyville. He had recently left Fillydelphia in the hopes of finding more work in Ponyville. His name was Ironworks. He was a contractor. While Fillydelphia was expanding, more of the well paying jobs had been given to companies that had a history in the business. He was the first in his family to have a cutie mark of construction. So when he heard that the small town of Ponyville was thinking of expanding he packed away some of his things and made his way toward the quiet town in an attempt to find more than the occasional renovation that somepony had thrown his way.

"I hope I'm not wasting my time here." The unicorn muttered to himself. He was small for a stallion. About the size of most mares. His coat was a light brown with a cutie mark of a hammer beating in a nail to a board. His mane and tail were hay colored. The mane laid flat against the top of his head and neck while his tail was strait. Despite his small size he appeared rather well built. It was easy to tell that he was strong. And while he wasn't a model he was certainly rather good looking.

The trip had been a long one. Not simply because of time but rather dragging his cart across Equestria. He had thought of buying a train ticket but decided against it seeing as he was low on bits and decided he could handle the trek there himself. Fortunately the road was always clear of obstacles such as fallen trees or potholes. The guards did a good job keeping the road clear and safe despite it running through one of the most dangerous places in the kingdom. So while it had been hard work to trudge all the way here, he was at least able to enjoy the nice scenery if nothing else.

Checking his map he quickly noticed that at the rate he was going he should arrive in Ponyville soon and be able to find a place to set up shop before nightfall. Tucking away the map back in his cart he continued on enjoying the quiet of his trip.

"HELP ME!" Suddenly he heard what sounded like a mare's voice calling out somewhere to his right. Unhooking himself from the cart he quickly rushed that way, only stopping to think when he had actually seen who had called. It was a rather cute mare. Her coat was purple while her mane and tail were more pink than anything and had a much lighter stripe running through the middle of it. Her cutie mark was three smiling flowers. And her eyes were the most brilliant shade of green. And at that moment, filled with fear and trained on the three timber wolves that had backed her up against the tree.

Not wasting time, Ironworks fired a bolt of magical energy that struck the wolf that was closest to the mare square in his side, sending him rolling for a little ways. The other two quickly turned their attention towards the new threat and snarled at him before charging the unicorn. Not having the time to charge another bolt Ironworks wheeled around and planted a firm buck on the first wolf's jaw. Snapping it and sending it stumbling back. Unfortunatly he wasn't quick enough for react to the third and it tackled him, biting into his front left leg causing him to yell in pain.

Using his magic he opened the timber wolf's mouth before rolling away and charging his horn again. This time the bolt shattered the wolf's front paw, causing it to howl out in pain. Using this opportunity, Ironworks trotted over to the mare and thew up the most powerful shield that he could muster. By now the other wolves had recovered and were helping their comrade, whose arm was reconnecting itself, try to break through the golden barrier. After several minutes of trying and failing to get through, the wolves simply growled at the two ponies before slinking off deeper into the forest.After several minutes of silence Ironworks lowered the shield and turned towards the dirty, afraid, but otherwise uninjured mare.

However, Ironworks wasn't feeling good. The blood loss was getting to him. His vision, where it wasn't blacking out was blurring. He felt lightheaded and constantly trying to keep a shield up with 3 timber wolves attacking had been very draining.

"You..okay?" He managed to get out before collapsing to his knees.Just before he blacked out however, he heard a beautiful voice say...

"Hold on!"

Ironworks woke hazily. Checking around the room he quickly realized he wasn't anywhere he recognized. Panicking slightly, he quickly sat up only for a pain that felt like his brain was in a vice to shoot through his head. Slowing down he looked around the unfamiliar room. The walls were a plain white same as the sheets he was in. The bed itself had several strange buttons on a nearby control pad by his right hoof. There was also the sounds of things being rolled around outside and the commotion of ponies talking. From the few bits he could make out seemed to be medical related.

I'm in a hospital. the stallion thought. Before he could do anything else though a nurse trotted in. Her coat was pure white while her mane was pure pink. Her cutie mark seemed to be a red cross with four pink hearts around it. This also seemed to be the same mark on her tiara. Her eyes were also a very deep blue.

"Oh. You're awake." She said walking up and began to change the bandages on his leg.

"How did I get here?"

"Miss Cheerilee brought you here. She said you saved here from several timber wolves. I'm surprised this bite is all that happened to you." She said bringing up fresh gauze.

"Is she OK?"

"She's fine. In fact she's just outside. Would you like to speak with her?"

"Yes, please. Miss..?"

"Redheart. I'll send here right in." She said turning back towards the door after applying the fresh bandages.

In walked the mare he had saved from those timber wolves. She had a few bandaids covering some cuts and looked a little dirty but otherwise no worse for where.

"Are you feeling OK?" She asked looking concerned.

"Yes. Thank you for bringing me back here." Ironworks responded with a smile.

The mare looked down and blushed slightly. "It was the least that I could do after you saved me like that." She looked rather cute when she blushed.

"So your Ms.Cheerilee?" He said enjoying the rather good view the cute mare in front of him made. "I'm Ironworks."

She looked up at him and smiled intently "Hello Ironworks. Nice to meet you."

"I owe you one." He said before something dawned on him. "What happened to my cart?"

She looked at him with those emerald green eyes. "I told some of my friends who stopped by what happened and they volunteered to go get your cart."

"Again, thank you." He said before changing the subject. "So what were you doing in the Everfree like that?"

"I'm the teacher around here. We're covering botany for a few weeks and I needed some examples of more exotic plants." She took a seat in the nearby chair before continuing. "So what are you doing in Ponyville anyway? It's not often we get new faces around here."

"I'm a contractor. Buisness was being taken by all the companies with a history back in Fillydelphia. So when I heard about this place needing ponies who could help expand, I packed up and headed out here."

She smiled looking a little hopeful. "So do you think you'll have a lot of free time?"

"Probably once i get released from here and can set myself up. Why?"

She looked away blushing a little bit. "Well I just wanted to treat you to dinner for saving me like that. Maybe even show you around the town."

"Like a date?"

She blushed a little deeper. "Sure."

"Sounds like a good time to me." He said, causing her to beam with excitement. "On one condition." She looked a little crestfallen but looked inquisitive. "I get to pay for dinner. I wouldn't feel right letting you pay for it." Her smile returned and looked like she was about to start bouncing in her seat. Just then the nurse entered.

"Visiting hours are over. I'm sorry but you'll have to leave." Nurse Redheart said holding the door. Cheerilee looked a little sad at this but turned back towards Ironworks.

"Well, I guess I should let you get some rest." She said getting up to leave. "Get better soon."

"I will. See you soon." He said before Cheerilee left.

Maybe I didn't waste my time.

Dancing With the Sun

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The gala was in full swing. Which wasn't saying much. The nobles, for all their claim to superiority, couldn't organize a party to save their lives. There was no energy, no movement aside from the odd slow dance, and some of the worst attitudes that i had ever seen. The only place that had anything approaching energy was the room where the Wonderbolts were. But I didn't handle crowds well, nor was I that big of a fan of the Wonderbolts so I was just standing next to the punch bowl trying to make it through the night. I had had a feeling that the gala would be something like this. Partially because of what Twilight and her friends had said about it and partially because I had been to a few when I was younger. But when the princess herself invites you, you say yes.

I guess I should introduce myself. I'm Richard Powell. I'm a human. I'm about 5'10" with short black hair, brown eyes, and lightly tanned skin. I was a collage sophomore studying engineering at Wooster Polytech. That was before I got teleported here to Equestria. How, I'm not quite sure. But it had been rather interesting. I quickly became a sort of celebrity because humans in this world were just old legends. Some were afraid of me because the human legends spoke of ferocious warriors who would plunder and destroy at a whim. But in the same legends were tails of great achievement and compassion. Thankfully the princesses were willing to give me a chance based on the later.

So for the past few months I had been helping Equestria with some different technologies such as a refrigerator, a combustion engine, and even production lines. This quickly made me more popular in the eyes of many in Equestria, especially the nobles. Mainly because they saw me as an excuse to make tons of money rather easily. Luckily for the rest of Equestria, I knew enough to give the patents to multiple ponies in order keep monopolies from happening. I also was constantly with some sort of scientist who were constantly asking questions about something. Twilight and Celestia were easily the most fun to talk to. Their questions were less about the tech that I had introduced and more what human culture was like and what went on in my world.

"How is the gala?" A regal voice asked to my right. Turning, I saw Celestia approaching. She was one of the princesses that ruled Equestria. The other being her sister. (Why are they princesses if there are no king and queen, I don't know.) She was a few inches taller than me, with a pure white coat and a ethereal flowing rainbow mane. She had a long white horn and large wight wings. Her eyes were a beautiful amethyst that seemed to look right into you. Most astonishingly, despite being the ruler of the land, she had the best attitude of any of the nobles that I had come across. Admittedly I may have found her rather attractive.

"Boring." I replied with a smirk, offering up a fresh glass of punch.

"Yes it often is that way." She said taking the drink I offered. "That is why I wanted to invite Twilight and her friends again. But the nobles threw a fit about last time and that was that."

"How much did it cost to fix this place after that catastrophe anyway?" I asked looking at the pillars which I could tell were new in the room.

"Oh not much. A few hundred bits"

I looked at her in shock. One, because that was a ridiculously small amount for the damage that was reportedly done. Second, because of the fact that she referred to the cost of "a few hundred bits" as a small amount when most ponies worked for months to make that much.

"Magic makes it much easier to repair things such as this room." She said taking note of my shocked expression. "And I'm a princess. I know it is a lot of money to a lot of ponies but it is pocket change for me."

Shaking my head, (I swear that she can read minds), I looked back at the dance floor. A few of the nobles were prancing around one another in something that approached dancing. I really didn't get formal pony dances. Most were just walking back and forth with one another. It just didn't look natural to me. It just looked too stiff. As the song wrapped up the nobles bowed to their respective partners and either paired back up for the next song or left the dance floor.

"Would you like to dance?"

Looking over at Celestia, she had put here drink down and and was looking at me both playfully and with something that resembled hopefully.

"No, I can't dance." I said trying to turn her down gently. I wasn't lying per say. I knew several formal dances, my parents made sure of that, but I wasn't the best dancer, I wasn't sure how to dance with a pony, and mostly I was too shy to dance with anyone. Especially the princess.

"Please?" She looked at me with those large eyes almost pleadingly and I melted a little looking into them.

"...Okay."

I swear to God that she then squeed before using her magic to drag me out to the dance floor.

Now I was a little worried. Mainly because i was still trying to figure out how to dance with a horse. Turning towards Celestia when we reached the center of the dance floor, I was interrupted from my thoughts by Celestia throwing her front hooves over my shoulders.

"Umm... Celestia?"

"This is how humans dance isn't it?" She said a wide eyed smile on her face. Surprisingly for someone aproaching the size of a full size horse, she didn't weigh all that much. Whether from magic or whether ponies are naturally light for their size, was unclear. What was clear though was: how I was supposed to dance with the princess? I wasn't a vet but generally horses aren't supposed to move on two legs. The music started but neither of us were ready so I decided to take the time to teach Celestia.

"I guess now's as good a time as any to teach you about how humans dance." I said taking her fight hoof in my left hand and placing my right on her side. Her eyes filled with excitement as I positioned myself appropriately. The music was a decent speed and was perfect for the foxtrot.

"This one's called a foxtrot." I explained. She looked curious but remained silent. "It's two slower steps back starting with your right hoof. Just follow my lead." As I lead Celestia through the dance it was easy to tell that she wasn't as comfortable on two hooves as she might of thought she would be. But she was a fast learner and before the song ended was rather proficient at the dance.

When the dance ended I took a step back from Celestia and gave her a light bow. She giggled before replying with a small curtsy of her own.

"Care for another dance?" she said. Admittedly I had enjoyed that. And seeing as how well the night seemed to be going I figured that another wouldn't hurt.

Celestia and I danced the rest of the night out on the dance floor. I taught her some more fast stuff and slow stuff as the songs changed appropriately. I had never been one for dancing but I could have danced until the night ended. Celestia was certainly enjoying this. She was a very good dancer. Especially if you consider that she usually uses four legs. She seemed to especially enjoy the slower dances. I admit I did too.

Unfortunately the musicians had to go home and that put an end to our dances. As well as to my previous confidence as I noticed the eyes of numerous nobles trained on us. I stayed by Celestia for the rest of the night. Which, unfortunately wasn't long because many of the nobles had already left the gala. After the last of the nobles left we headed for our bed rooms.

"That was very enjoyable." Celestia said looking over at me. "I haven't had so much fun at the gala for a long time."

"Glad you had as good a time as I did." I said as we reached her door. I said good night before turning to leave.

"Richard, wait!" she called. Turnign towards her, I was met with a pair of lips on my cheek.

"Sweet dreams." She said with a light blush before closing the door. Not that I noticed. I was still in a slight state of shock from the kiss. Eventually I shook myself out of it and smiled as I made my way down toward my room. Deciding that we needed to dance more often.

Tank Trouble

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"Trixie! Vinyl! Come on! Movie's about to start." Jeff was calling out for two ponies as he searched around his house. He had been housing two of them since they had arrived in his world. When two pastel ponies apeared in Jeff's garage he thought he had gone insane. But after several hours of explaining from the ponies he figured he would at least make them feel at home until Trixie could find a way to get them back home. Unfortunately, Vinyl Scratch seemed more interested in all the cool gizmos that the human world had to play with. He had already had to get his car repaired.

Figuring that they wouldn't be showing up, Jeff went down to his living room, closed the blinds and began to play Up. He was about thirty minutes into the movie when he heard a loud rumbling and mechanical noise echoing from outside. Getting up he paused the movie and went to draw the blinds. But then a tank crashed through his wall.The tank was tall enough that it only barely missed grinding on the roof. It had angled tan armor all over and a huge canon pointing right past Jeff's head. The treads were resting on part of the destroyed wall and what had been his favorite chair. Smoke and exhaust was also pouring in from behind the tank.

"Hey, Jeff! Check this out!" Looking up he noticed a white unicorn with a blue mane and purple glasses waving at him from the gunner's hatch.

"That's a freakin' tank!" He called back over the din of the engine.

"Yes and with it, The Great and Powerful Trixie will show Twilight what she is truly capable of!" Looking down Jeff noticed a Blue female unicorn with a silver mane poking her head out from the driver's hatch.

"Where did you two get that?!" Jeff yelled at Trixie.

"Despite being capable warriors, your species isn't used to dealing with magic." Trixie replied with a cocky grin.

Jeff was appalled. "Do you mean to tell me that you stole that from an army base!?"

"Yeah! Dude, there were so many awesome toys there! I'm surprised that more of ya don't do this." Vinyl called out.

Before Jeff could respond there was the sound of a helicopter passing over head before a voice over a loud speaker called out.

"You in the tank! Come outside or you will be fired upon!" Jeff's face drained of all color instantly. Never mind the fact that his house would pretty much be leveled with little chance of any of them surviving, but if he did he would have a hell of a time explaining to the authorities how he came across two mythical unicorns and how they managed to hijack a tank.

"C'mon Trixie! We need to scram!" Vinyl said climbing back in and closing the hatch.

Before Jeff could protest, Trixie had closed her hatch and was backing the tank out of his wrecked house before taking off down the street. Obviously having trouble controlling the massive machine.

Jeff watched them go until they were out of sight still stunned at what they had done. Before he could act, several humvees pulled up in front of his house and several soldiers popped out and approached him.

"Did a tank just pass through here?" A sergeant asked. Jeff just looked around at the destroyed wall.

"Alright. Which way?" The sergeant said somewhat annoyed by Jeff's attitude. Jeff simply pointed down the street with all the carnage. "Just follow the destruction."

After the soldiers had hopped back into their vehicles Jeff hopped into his car, turned on the radio and began speeding off in the direction that he assumed that the two idiots had driven.

"The tank is now cruising down Red Rock Road southbound. It just passed Wilshire Boulevard."

Fixing his path based on what the news anchor had said he quickly sped down a back road trying to cut them off. After several minutes of cruising, he could finally make them out in the distance. With no other military vehicles that he could see, Jeff took off towards them. But just as he was about to reach them, the tank took a sharp right turn into an old deserted home. Pulling off into the bushes Jeff then whipped out his phone and tried to reach the old phone that he had given Vinyl. It rang for what felt like ages before the DJ picked it up.

"Hey,dude! What can I do for ya?" She sounded oblivious to what was going on.

"Vinyl, I need you and Trixie to teleport over to my car!" Jeff half screamed into the phone while flashing his lights towards the brick building.

"Woah! Calm down dude. I see ya. Why would we do that though? This is awesome!"

"Because you pissed off the military and they're coming this way! If you dont want to be the subject of some weird experiment, then I suggest that you get in this car now." There was a long pause before the phone hang up. Jeff figured that Vinyl just didn't listen before hanging up and was about to ring again before the two appeared in the back seat with a flash and small pop.

"Let's go home." Trixie said looking somewhat worried.

After a quick trip back, they pulled into Jeff's garage.Jeff was just thanking God that he lived out in the country so there weren't many people to see what actually happened.

"Trixie is sorry for what was done." She said after being severely scolded by Jeff. "Trixie could repair the front of the house for you if you want?"

"No. Don't. If you do I'm just going to have trouble explaining why my house magically fixed itself." Jeff said rubbing his temples. Just then there was a knock at the door.

"Sir. This is the police. We would like to talk with you." Jeff sighed before turning back to the two ponies.

"Stay up here and don't draw any attention to yourselves." He said before walking out of his bedroom.

Fortunately no one suspected him of anything. Jeff got his insurance to pay for the damage and get his house fixed. Trixie eventually got her spell right and she and Vinyl went home. Meanwhile Jeff became known to his friends as "the guy who had a tank crash through his house." As much headache as the two ponies caused him, he was still sad to see them go. Jeff would always remember the two ponies and all the fun he had with the two.

Blind Luck

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Celestia's sun rose slowly over the horizon, painting the inside of the hut a golden honey color. The inside of the hut was filled with masks, shelves lined with books and potions, and a large black caldron sat in the center of the room. On the opposite side of the hut from the window where the sun came in was a bed. In the bed laid a sleeping zebra. Seemingly unfazed by the sunlight landing on her face she fidgeted a little to get comfortable before going back to her motionless deep sleep. In walked a blue unicorn with a wild black mane, deep blue eyes, and a cutie mark of a long, thick vine on his flank. Walking up to the bed he slowly shook the sleeping zebra while trying to wake her up.

"Come on, Zecora. Time to wake up." He said just loudly enough to get her attention.

The zebra stretched out from under the covers and began to wake up. Being a zebra she was covered in black and white stripes. Her mane was in a mohawk and her cutie mark was of a line spiraling inward with little triangles pointing out from around it, making it look like a rough depiction of the sun. She also had multiple gold rings around her front left hoof and most notably, around her neck. What was most notable though was her her teal blue eyes seemed to be slighty glazed over and didn't seem to focus on anything in the room.

" Good morning, Evening Herb. Is it already time to be disturbed?" She said rubbing her eyes.

"Afraid so." He replied using his magic to lift the covers off the mare. She slowly rolled out of bed and onto her hooves before laying her head over the stallions back. When she had done that, he walked back toward the room he had just come out of. Inside there was a shower, toilet, and several other amenities that indicated this was a bathroom. Walking over to the shower which had already been used, he guided her into it before pulling the curtain behind her.

"I'm gonna make breakfast. You alright?" His response was the sound of the water running. Content that she was now able to handle herself for a while he walked back out into the main room and over to the fridge. Bringing out several eggs and some salad greens, he placed a pan on the stove before starting to mix the eggs. Several minutes later, he had two omelets with tomatos and lettuce ready on two plates. Just as he finished loading the last plate, the bathroom door opened and in walked Zecora. Her mane was limp against her body and she was still wet but otherwise fine.

"Shouldn't you be able to dry yourself?" He asked as she made her way towards him. She grumbled slightly before sitting down in front of one of the plates and digging in. Chuckling to himself, Evening levitated a towel out of the bathroom and began to dry her off.

"You know, sometimes I think that you're perfectly capable of doing everything by yourself. You just keep me around to wait on you."

"While that reason is rather true, you know that I wouldn't get by without you." She said from under the towel before giving the unicorn a nuzzle. Which he returned with a smile.

"Eat up. We got a lot to do today."

"Daisy's requested that we make more of those essence extraction potions." Evening said holding up one of the scrolls that lay in a small bag by the door.

"She uses up those potions fast. Perhaps we should make some to last. Get the bottles over there." She said trowing her head in the direction of a shelf. "The ones of green berries, and droppings of a hair."

Evening went over and floated out the requested ingredients. Laying them out next to several other materials that rested on small tables by Zecora's sides. As he went over to help her, there was a knocking at the door.

"Hello Zecora. Hello Evening." Said a lavender unicorn mare as she entered the hut. Her mane and tail were a deep navy blue with a pink and purple stripe running the length of both. She had amethyst eyes and a cutie mark of a six pointed star surrounded by five others.

"Ah, Twilight!" Zecora said slightly turning to face the door. "To what do I owe such a delight?"

"Oh,I just came by to pick up those ingredients I requested."

"Ah,yes. They are right outside. Just as you asked, cut and dried."

"Come on. I'lll show you." Evening said leading Twilight out the door and halfway around the hut. There sat a large basket filled with various jars of vines, bark, leaves, flowers and numerous other innocuous things. Picking it up in his magic he handed it over to Twilight, who took it in her own magic before setting it on her back.

"How is Zecora doing?"

"Pretty good. Sometimes I think she doesn't need me around."

"Don't say that." Twilight said, shooting a look at Evening. "Ever since the accident she's had trouble. I'm glad you came to town when you did. She was about to have stop her work because of what happened."

"I know. But sometimes with the way she acts and takes care of herself, you would have trouble believing that she's actually blind." They came around back in front of the hut to see Zecora mixing the ingredients in her cauldron.

"Just take care of her, alright? I don't want to loose a friend." Twilight said, her voice worrisome. Evening just shot her a confidant smile.

"Dont worry. I won't let anything happen to her."

After Twilight left they spent the rest of the day mixing the necessary ingredients into the requested potions. As night fell they were laying down together next to the fire. The cauldron had been removed and instead they let the fire just blaze away as the read a book. Or rather, Evening read a book to Zecora.

""...The masked man held up the small brown vial and said "What you do not smell is called Iocane powder. It is odorless, tasteless, dissolves instantly in liquid, and is one of the more deadly poisons known to ponies."

"Such a thing is not so. If it were, I'd have learned of it so long ago" Zecora mused her head resting against Evening's neck.

"It's a fictional story. They can make up whatever they want." Evening said looking down at the sleepy zebra. "But that's enough for tonight. I think we need to sleep."

"But what of the duel and poison? Will Vizzini choose the right one?" Zecora bemused from half closed eyes as Evening put out the fire, before lifting Zecora with his magic.

"Guess we'll find out tomorrow." Evening led her over to the bed before laying her down in it and climbing in himself. Zecora snuggled in closer as Evening pulled the blanket over them.

"Goodnight, Zecora."

"Goodnight Evening. I hope that you.." Zecora trailed off as she drifted to sleep. Evening chuckled and pulled her in close. Before drifting off himself to the sounds of her breathing and the music of the crickets.

Clopping

View Online

In the halls of Canterlot Castle, a human looked around the hallway. Once he had confirmed that no one was coming, he opened the door on his right and entered. Taking one last look around the hall, he closed the door behind him and made his way to his bed. Smiling to himself he slowly pulled out one of his most prized possessions. Something that had brought him many hours of enjoyment in his time in this new world. Getting exited he set it next to him and began to do things to it to get it ready to use. Just then there was a knock at the door before it swung open to reveal Princess Celestia.

"Davis! I was lookin..." She trailed off looking at the human on the bed. There was nothing out of the ordinary about him. His skin was the same pale white with freckles as it always was. His hair was the same curly ginger color as it had been when they had first met. What made the princess pause for a moment was the small device that rested on his bed.

"Umm, Davis? What is that?" She said pointing towards the strange object.

"A laptop." He responded casually. "Remember those computers that I told you about in my world?" He asked going back to typing on the keyboard. She nodded and walked over to him looking at the screen There was a picture of Davis with a few other humans. Some seemed to be the females of his species. They were apparently on top of a mountain or large hill because of the view that was behind him. A small arrow icon made it's way across the screen and clicked on one of a few symbols on the left side of the screen. Bringing up a white area with more symbols on it that covered the picture behind.

"Well this is basically a smaller version of the large ones that I told you about. It was designed to have less bulk so that it could be carried around by someone." Davis said looking up at the alicorn taking his hands off the keyboard that was connected to the screen at an obtuse angle. "When I arrived here in Equestria, this was one of the few things that I had. But one thing that changed on her was that there seemed to be several new video games installed on here." Looking back at the screen for a moment.

"What is a video game?" The princess asked looking at the strange device in awe.

"Oh, right. I never told you. Basically it's a game that you can play using this device. I was actually getting ready to play one on her I haven't played in a while called CLOP."

Celestia's eyes widened as her cheeks reddened considerably. "Davis!" She admonished sounding incredulous. "I cant believe that you would do something so... inappropriate in front of a princess!"

Davis blushed heavily and his eyes widened to the size of baseballs. "Oh, nonononononono, Princess! Not like that!" He retreated waving his hands in a panicked back and forth motion. "It's a game where you try to move this unicorn forward! Nothing inappropriate at all!"

Celestia sighed as her blush lessened. She was relieved and disappointed at the same time for some reason. The blush that was there now was mostly just there because of embarrassment of assuming what Davis was doing had anything to do with something so risqué.

"May I play with you?" She asked trying to get past the awkwardness.

"Sure! It'd be fun to play with someone for a change." He said clicking on one of the new icons of a rather feral looking unicorn bring up the program.

The program showed a starting screen. Clicking on the start button, Davis was immediately brought to the beginning of the game. There was the picture of a boy seemingly calling out to a unicorn and a picture of said unicorn below that. Both had text boxes that had words written in bad middle English. The boy seemed to be telling the unicorn that there was a virgin on the other side of this hill, and the uicorn seemed to be warning the boy that this had better not be one of his jokes because he hated hills. When Davis tapped on the small pad beneath the keys, the text disappeared and under the unicorn were the letters "k,h,j,l."

"Now here's how you play." Davis said putting his hands over the the keys with the corresponding letters on them.

"Use the "k" and "h" letters to move the front legs." he said tapping them and making the unicorn's front legs move. The horse seemed to drag itself forward as those two were pressed. "And "j and "l" keys to move the back legs." Tapping the other keys made the rear legs move, forcing the unicorn to almost flip onto it's back after a few steps. "Tap them in some semblance of an order to get the unicorn to move." Tapping all four of the keys now the unicorn moved. Not in anyway natural, but it was forward movement.

"That sounds too easy." Celestia noted looking at the awkwardly moving horse with confusion.

"Wait until we get to some obstacles." Davis smirked knowing what pain awaited the two of them. Soon he arrived at some rocks. While obstacles, they were still easy to traverse. Pretty soon though the landscape became more sloped and forward speed as well as balance seem to go down exponentially with each degree of sloping the game provided. Reaching a series of steps, Davis got part way up them before the unicorn started to fall onto his back. Pressing the keys at random and making the legs flail in an attempt to keep the creature upright didn't work and the unicorn fell onto his back. When that happened, a picture of the boy from earlier appeared and text appeared next to him reading "Clip-clop. I heard a four-legged varlot drop."

"Damn." Davis said looking annoyed. "Here." He said turning the computer to face the princess. While she didn't have fingers, she did have magic and the keys glowed in a golden aura. The game popped back into the beginning and she began. Originally thinking that the only reason that Davis seemed to be flailing the legs was because he wasn't sure on how to move four of them, she quickly realized that the reason that he had made it look so awkward was because it was. Unable to make the unicorn move in anything approaching a dignified manner, she quickly gave up as the first of the rocks came into view. Getting the first legs over the rocks seemed to be easy enough, and the rear legs were fine so long as the size of the rock wasn't too big. Eventually reaching the stairs. She move the legs awkwardly, but actually got over the stairs.

"Pretty good Celestia."

Feeling a sense of pride for making it farther than her more experienced counterpart, she soon arrived at a more serious incline. Moving the legs in the same way she had at the stairs didn't work and she soon flipped over. When she had done that the boy and the text appeared at the top of the screen again. This time reading "Fail".

"I do not like this boy." Celestia observed before giving the computer back to the human.

"That's the point." Davis said as the game popped back to the beginning.

"Then why put him in?"

"This is a rage game. A game specifically designed to get you mad at it."

"Why would someone make something like that?"

"It's fun to watch other people struggle to get through these types of games." He said as he traversed the stairs. "That and give you a feeling of accomplishment for doing the slightest thing right."

Feeling that this was rather stupid, Celestia turned her attention back to the game. Davis was now at the part where she had flipped. While he had slightly more luck the results were the same. Flipping over and a taunt from the boy. This time reading "Haw, ye silly ol' horse!" They carried on for about half an hour all the while failing to get very far and the game testing even Celestia's patience. After flipping at the first rock, Celestia's legendary patience wore thin.

"Oh,Come On!" Celestia half shouted at the game. "I made it over that rock every time that I got there but now you do this? And buck you too!" She cried at the aggravating taught of the boy.

"Umm.. You want me to play for a while?" Davis asked, looking slightly worried.

"Would you, please?" Davis took control for the next few attempts not getting much past the stairs. Eventually Celestia calmed down and was able to take control back for a few of the attempts. Even getting farther than Davis had. Beating the game that was trying to make her fail was very satisfying indeed. Eventually though, she reached a rock that had a "V" in them. Thinking nothing of it she approached the obstacle. While she managed to get her front legs over, her back legs got stuck in the little hole. Unable to move the rear legs, she mashed the K and H keys. Eventually there was a cracking sound and the horse dragged itself out of the hole, It's rear legs dragging along the ground and unable to move. A little notification at the top of the screen read: "Lame Horse Mode Unlocked."

"What..?" Celestia asked somewhat disturbed at this.

""Lame Horse Mode". When the rear legs are disabled and you have to drag yourself along with the front legs." Davis explained.

Trying to operate the rear legs confirmed what Davis had said. With no other choice, she bagan to make the unicorn drag himself along. As awkward as it was for Celestia to look at, it actully seemed more stable. Without having to worry about flipping over the rear and being able to just have to get the front legs over a rock made things much easier. As such, she was able to make it rather far up the hill. Even if her pace had slowed to an unbearable crawl. Without the back legs to aid in movement, she was moving at a snails pace. Which would have been fine had it not also made it near impossible to go up any sort of incline.

At this point in the game, most of the ground was now at an incline. And a rather sharp one at that. Eventually she reached a rather large incline and got stuck. No matter how she tried to make it move forward, she couldn't get it to go forward. Only get the digital horse to trot it's front hooves in place.

"This could take a while."

"...and that is how a unicorn horn works."

"Wow. I didn't know that the horn was such a complex blend of bone, spell matrices, and sugar." Turning back to the screen to take a look at their progress as they had been talking, they were disappointed to find that they hadn't moved forward one inch.

"How long have we been talking?" Davis checked his watch.

"About 5 minutes." Celestia groaned. This was taking too long. While discussing things with Davis was rather nice, she would rather say that she had beaten the game. She decided to try taking more deliberate and long steps. Surprisingly it worked! Slowly, the unicorn started to pull himself up the incline. When it reached the top, both Celestia and Davis let out a cheer.

"Yes! I have beaten you game." She was so proud of herself. She had beaten one of the most difficult undertakings of her life. All she had to do was make it back down the hill and she would win. She was in such a race to finish, that she made the unicorn nearly fly over the rocks and up what was surely the last leg before beating the game. She was in such a ruch that she didn't have time to react to the sudden drop off that appeared out of no where. The unicorn tumbled over the edge and onto his back. The same irritating taunt that had greeted Celestia's first attempt popped up at the top of the screen next to the boy. Not that Celestia could see that, as all she could make out was red.

"Wow... That sucks. Celestia?" Davis looked worryingly over at the normally calm and collected solar princess. Her eyes contained an anger that could make entire armies flee in terror, her nostrils flared as she breathed hard and her mane, the once calm ever flowing rainbow, was now what appeared to be pure fire. Needless to say, It scared Davis out of his mind.

"BUCK YOU!" Rang out of Celestia's mouth. The canterlot voice making sure that the voice was heard all the was over in the Badlands. Breathing hard she looked at the device that had caused her so much headache. It now lay on the other side of the bed, thrown by the power of the voice into the dresser on the other side. For some reason still operating just fine. Must have been some sort of protection spell.

"Celestia..?" She swung her head over at the voice. Anger flaring as she heard it. Thankfully for Davis it calmed down when she saw how terrified the human was at the princess's actions.

"I apologize, Davis. My anger got the better of me." Celestia hung her head in shame. She was one of the rulers of Equestria.She should't let a simple game get to her so. Before she could admonish herself, she felt a hand scratch right behind her ear. Forgetting all of her anger and self loathing, she sighed at the wonderful feeling of Davis's scratching.

"It's okay, Celestia. Frankly I get as mad at these games too sometimes." Davis admitted. Getting up and walking back around the bed, picking up the lab top and closing the game. "But I do have other games on here. Some that are more fun and less infuriating." Celestia's curiosity was piqued. She felt slightly drained after her outburst, but felt inclined to see what Davis had in store all the same.

"What else do you have in there?"

"How about this one? The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion."

Apocalypse

View Online

It was midnight. I was sitting in the attic of a home we had decided was reasonably safe. My father's shotgun rested against the wall next to me, my handgun on my thigh, and my pack on my other side. It was a chilly october night and it was too dangerous to consider a fire, or sleeping down in the rest of the house that was actually warm. Not that I cared at the moment. For the past several days, I had been running around all over the damn place trying to find other survivors. Ones that didn't try to shoot me dead. (Found plenty of those.) So far, I had only been lucky enough to find one who didn't want to kill me and actually survived. Her name was Apple Bloom.

My compatriot stirred. Nightmares of this crap probably running through her mind. Running my hand over her bright red mane, partly to soothe her, partly to calm my nerves. Apple Bloom, apart from being the warmest thing I had at the moment, was also a good pony. She might have been terrified of what she saw, but she did a good job of hiding that and doing what needed to be done. A loud groan outside shook me out of my musings. Looking out the window, I noticed several zombies walking by the house we were holed up in. Thankfully, none of them seemed interested in this place.

Not even a full week ago, things were normal. The part of town we were in was considered one of the safest areas in the state. Now, it was suicide to be out anywhere in this town after dark. If not for the zombies, than the people who had resorted to violence against anyone to try and survive. Unfortunately, our travels constantly brought us into the path of these psychopaths.

Don't get me wrong. There were also plenty of people we met who were actually rather helpful and kind. Unfortunately, we usually were going around trying to find anyone we recognized. I was looking for any old friends that might have survived this, and Apple Bloom was looking for anyone from her family who was still alive. I had found several of my friends along the way. It was nice to know that some old friends had also survived the dead rising. They, however, had the good common sense to stay put whenever we found a group of people who weren't "shoot-on-sight." I was stuck with Apple Bloom as we looked for what was left of her family. Not that I minded, of course. It jsut wasn't the smartest thing to be doing.

You see, she and her family had come to this town because her older sister, Applejack, and my dad had been good friends through business since first contact. My dad had invited her and her family down her for the Harvest festival that the town threw every year. Just about the only thing of interest that happened in this small Texas town. I hadn't met many ponies before so I wasn't sure what to think, except that my dad did business with them and that usually meant that they were good people. When they arrived, I found that they were perhaps more touchy than I would have liked, but otherwise, good people.

Unfortunately, that weekend the world decided to end. We were at the fair and the ponies were marveling at the size and complexity of some of the rides. Suddenly there was some screaming from the crowd up ahead. My dad and I rushed up there to find several people chewing on my teacher, Mrs. Bialek, and her husband. I grabbed the hammer off of the strength test and my dad grabbed his pocket knife. It took a while to stop these things, finally managing to knock in their heads. But by the time we had done this, Mr and Mrs. Bialek started to stand up. Realizing that we weren't going to last long we ran back, grabbed the Apples and left with the rest of the crowd. Somewhere in there we got separated from Apple Bloom's brother and granny. I just hope that they got out alright.

On the way back to the house we ran into a much larger group of zombies. We managed to got most of the way around the side when one of them noticed AJ. She got bit on the rump as we tried to get away. She just laughed it off as a scratch. I don't think she would have been laughing if she knew what would happen as a result.

Finally getting home, my dad and I started to barricade the place up and grab our guns. Once we were certain that we safe, dad went and got the medical kit and started to tend to AJ's bite. She was out of it at this point and appeared to be sleeping as my dad administered some stitches . My dad had just finished placing a bandage over it when she started to stir. We gathered around, my dad shaking her trying to wake her up. Just then she whirled around and bit into my dad's neck. He screamed as I rushed forward and kicked her in the face. That only seemed to knock her back for a second as she looked at me hungrily with discolored bloodshot eyes.

There was a loud bang as my dad fired his shotgun at point blank at her head. There was a spray of blood as she collapsed. Looking down at my dad I noticed that the bite wasn't as bad as I thought it was. I knelt down by him to try and tend to the wound. He only shoved me off of him and handed me his shotgun before ordering me to get in the car and get out of here. I was about to protest when I remembered that Applejack had been bitten as well before turning into one of those things. As well as Mr. and Mrs. Bialek.

I went to get Apple Bloom as she was crying over the body of her sister. I scooped her up and she didn't protest. Too drained from the days events most likely. rushing out to the garage I put AB in the passenger seat before climbing in and heading off. We were almost off the property when I heard a shot coming from the house. I kept myself from looking back. It was the only thing I could do not to cry.

We stopped by one of my friend's places. I was glad to see him and his family were all alright. AB and I stayed the night there mostly tossing and turning as we tried to sleep. The next morning over breakfast, Apple Bloom asked me something: She asked me why I wasn't upset about losing my dad. I told her that crying wouldn't bring him back and that now I had her to look after and I was trying to keep her spirits up. She then asked me if I could help her find the rest of her family. I agreed. Mostly because I didn't want AB to end up without a family like me.

So now we've been traveling around several towns trying to find them. Mostly we've gotten "Yeah, but they moved on a little bit ago" or "Sorry, never seen 'em."I was starting to wonder if they've made it back to Equestria, but from what I learned from the other ponies we've met, (which isn't many) the gate was closed soon after the outbreak happened, so it was unlikely that they made it back home. Not that I cared. I still made a promise to Apple Bloom. Alive or Dead, I was going to find her family and help them get home.